ULPT Request: What can you put on your resume that's impossible to verify
Posted by captaindiratta@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 63 comments
Quirky-Invite7664@reddit
A degree from a college that closed down years ago.
chorrky@reddit
I have two degrees from a college that closed. They still have a database of who finished and who didn't, unfortunately
Complex-Scarcity@reddit
Nope. Colleges that close give their records to another to maintain.
breakinbans@reddit
regional business sales manager for CompUSA.
FormidableMistress@reddit
My bestie used to work for Kmart and is my old boss anytime I need a lie. Toys R Us, Blockbuster, Radio Shack, etc are also defunct businesses you can claim to have worked for. You could also write down any grocery store that used to be local to you and now only operates a handful in another state.
The same goes for schools that were destroyed or no longer operating. My K-12 records were destroyed in a hurricane.
GloriouslyGrimGoblin@reddit
Using defunct businesses to patch a gap in your CV is fine and dandy in moderation.
But if every business you ever worked for in the past is now bankrupt, burnt down, washed away in a flood, or some other sort of gone, they might not want to hire you and continue that pattern.
MungoJennie@reddit
“I’m not hiring that guy. He’s a jinx!” /s
GloriouslyGrimGoblin@reddit
Exactly.
"So, we don't think you're a good fit for this company, sorry. However, and of course completely off the record, [competitor's name] might benefit from someone with your skill profile. You should apply there."
FormidableMistress@reddit
Yeah I meant one of these to patch a hole, not the entire thing.
Creepy_old_man_in_IL@reddit
Pimp.
coolsellitcheap@reddit
Present your trophy for pimp of the year from players ball.
Convenientjellybean@reddit
Present your hookers for verification purposes
Electronic_Repeat_81@reddit
Time Magazine’s 2006 Person Of The Year. I’m putting it in my obituary.
bbennett108@reddit
JeffTrav@reddit
mindyourownbusiness3@reddit
Had to look that one up b
Dull_Banana1377@reddit
Who is it
Iguanabewithyou@reddit
78preshe8@reddit
Not me - you!
Iguanabewithyou@reddit
Iguanabewithyou@reddit
No-Reputation-7843@reddit
Any position at the Chemtool Mechanical Grease factory in Rockton IL.
Awkward_Point4749@reddit
An employment history that required you to sign an NDA
JeffSergeant@reddit
Blockbusters Regional Manager
Ok-Magazine-7393@reddit
Sucks when I actually was a manager at blockbuster and my resume looks like I’m just making shit up. Lol
DrDeems@reddit
I feel the same about RadioShack haha. I was a manager for a few years there.
Prospector_Steve@reddit
You were the 2006 Time person of the year.
Popular-Drummer-7989@reddit
A organized language from the 80s
thatsabruno@reddit
P = NP
No_Cash7233@reddit
Twitter 🤷🏼♀️
ChingusMcDingus@reddit
Unless the interviewer is an expert in thing you can put anything on your resume. Usually “Experienced in/Fluent with” pretty much any software like Microsoft office suite of applications or whatever (more niche more better) is a nice bit to pad your resume.
Also “trained in violence and harassment prevention/intervention” is a good one. Read an article on workplace violence procedures and you have enough familiarity to slime your way through.
jinzokan@reddit
The last one could look like mandated classes....
MungoJennie@reddit
Safety in the workplace?
jinzokan@reddit
Specifically violence and harassment.
tacos_y_burritos@reddit
Volunteer work in South America. Could make up a website, phone number, contact, and the fact that it doesn't exist anymore would not be surprising.
RustBucket59@reddit
All of my past employers no longer exist. True story!
colonels1020@reddit
District Manager for Circuit City
ShortPeak4860@reddit
Hate to break it to you, but they’re still open 🤣
subhuman_voice@reddit
Online
The_Troyminator@reddit
To add authenticity, say you keep in touch with your old boss and have a friend be that boss.
CanoePickLocks@reddit
I know a bunch of them actually which makes this comment hysterical! I’m screenshotting it and sending it out now!
thunder_rob@reddit
personal assistant to JD Salinger
ActuatorSea4854@reddit
Mud Shark fileter, I even have a speed record.
thewharfartscenter_@reddit
You were training mushing dogs in Utqiagvik Alaska for X amount of time. Unless someone in that company knows someone in Utq, it can never be verified.
ironicmirror@reddit
"cannot disclose, signed NDA"
miraculum_one@reddit
Let's see the NDA
jongscx@reddit
It's covered by the NDA.
StevieG-2021@reddit
Which is covered by another NDA
GaGa0GuGu@reddit
we need a circle of NDAs construction of which is also covered by am NDA
JustPlainRude@reddit
It's NDAs all the way down
GaGa0GuGu@reddit
that would be a downwards NDA spiral of which you shouldn't have known
Mother-Pride-Fest@reddit
I know something of NDA spirals but it's covered by DNA
GaGa0GuGu@reddit
sorry, that's mine, had to seal them with blood
JustPlainRude@reddit
It's NDAs all the way down
erisod@reddit
Jobs at companies that no longer exist would be hard to verify.
SPL15@reddit
“1997 Washington County Fair Hot Dog Eating Champion”
There’s 31 washington counties in the US, so would be extremely difficult to pinpoint which one.
1998 is when the Nation Archives started the Electronic Records Archive” program was started.
AgeBeneficial@reddit
I have my dad’s 1972 Ice Cream Glutton champion plaque in my hallway.
I kept up the family spirit by winning his company’s picnic pie eating contest in 1994.
Got enough Baskin Robins gift certificates to purchase an ice cream cake for my birthday a month later.
Mmmm
nicholus_h2@reddit
i mean, they could just ask...
"says here you won the county fair hot dog eating championship? that's so interesting, tell me about that? what state was that in?"
you are either going to have to name a state or come up with a reason why you can't say it don't remember (which is suspicious and a bad look).
risksxh1@reddit
There's really a lot you can do if you don't go overboard. For instance, I worked data entry for an auto insurance company about ten years ago that no longer exists. I learned a whole lot while I was there. At the time I was told we were basically assisting underwriting. I could probably finesse that into an underwriting position now. I really do have about 17 years combined auto insurance work under my belt. It's been a little while, I was doing Home design, but that ended up being even more boring than auto insurance. And I could finagle my home design experience into something else too. Home design sales, etc. Nothing glamorous, but better than what I was doing for a long time.
scttlvngd@reddit
Secret agent
AbueloOdin@reddit
That you were a Director of Whatever in AbueloOdin Inc. I got you, fam.
deleted_by_reddit@reddit
[removed]
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