"Went with the flow" for many years and it's gotten me very far - now being told to take the reigns

Posted by MediocreDot3@reddit | ExperiencedDevs | View on Reddit | 14 comments

Ive worked at very large companies my entire career (F500 tech heavy companies) and been on large teams. I made a lot of quick progress to senior engineer by a couple job hops and just being easy going and not pushing back a lot

I've seen people and even helped hire people who come in and try to do too much and end up getting burned and pushed out quickly because of that.

Well now I'm being told I need to start owning things and pushing decisions and stuff and I'm having a hard time adjusting. The stakeholders and the scope has always been handed to me and now I'm essentially being told to do some skunk works type stuff as well as act as sort of a staff engineer with getting support across teams so I'm having to play like politics and stuff with teams

I'm fully remote but I went onsite a few months ago and felt like I clicked well with the larger parts of my team I dont interact much with but man even just getting a simple answer from them is like pulling teeth and since I'm just trying to brainstorm some skunkworks type stuff I don't want to waste their time by just forcing these guys into zoom with me (but tbh thats how my my manager got to his position)

I *want* to get more politically savvy as my manager is telling me but it's like pulling teeth at a company this size and it already feels like everyone is kinda guarded cause of the politics in general

What are some good resources or strategies to start gathering organizational influence as an engineer?

One of the big problems I face is my team is just myself and another contractor who only reports to me and my manager. So these people don't really have any engineering experience w/ me. But my manager was the owner of this project before me and was able to build influence. Really I think by just speaking up and inserting himself. And I'd do that but I don't want everyone to hate me lol.

One other thing is I'm the youngest and have always been the youngest on my teams. I'm Gen z and everyone I work with is Gen x or millennial. So especially older devs I find it really hard to get taken seriously with my own ideas

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MinecReddit@reddit

It doesn't have to be political - you can be a data-driven truthseeker and get support for your projects if they really are that important to the company. Companies all have limited resources, and it's about deciding what to spend it on, and if the project your manager is handing you is important, then you need to communicate why it's important and get buyin.

I think something that gets overblown a lot is the concept that workplace politics is about selling something that isn't real. Yes, people do this sometimes, but the majority of the reason your manager got buyin probably has little to do with him "playing politics" and has more to do with the fact that your project is actually important and deserves resourcing/funding.

Taking the reigns is about communication and collaboration, it's not about "playing politics." Your soft skills matter, but don't think that you have to do weird things like embellish stuff or make things up to be successful. Inserting yourself is about being confident in the product priorities, and working with other teams to find out what you all should be doing and why. I know this doesn't exactly tell you how to do this, but this post reads to me a little like it's written from my former self who had bad impostor syndrome and was afraid to insert myself, but just BE CONFIDENT

Approach cross-team collaboration with an open mind, and at the same time make sure you clearly and loudly state exactly what you need and why, and what about your work is important to the org/company.

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MediocreDot3@reddit (OP)

My manager has talked about confidence a lot in our 1 on 1s.

One thing I have trouble with is pushing back when something doesn't seem right and someone's saying it is. I feel like I'm so laid back that when I pull the "no, actually .." card people are like oh lawd he's finally snapped and get really alarmed lol

engineered_academic@reddit

Staff Engineer's Path has some good examples. You will need to learn to lead with soft power.

SolidDeveloper@reddit

I’ve tried reading it twice now, and just couldn’t get past the halfway point, as I lost interest each time. I don’t know, I didn’t feel like I retained much from it…

ghdana@reddit

Ditto, maybe interesting to a junior engineer, but the audiobook bored me to tears listening to it while on the exercise bike, where I listen to all sorts of books throughout the year.

Also, if you have enough experience, you recognize the author as the type of engineer that has time to write a book lmao. I just was picturing the one engineer in my department the few hours I did listen to the book.

A lot of it is common sense if you have been at the level for a while.

thisismyfavoritename@reddit

A lot of it is common sense

FTFY

QuitTypical3210@reddit

It sounds like your position is to break status quo. So when you talk to others, it has to be benefit-focused. If they don’t see a benefit, it’s just extra work or relearning if it’s adopted.

hipsterdad_sf@reddit

The move from "easy to work with" to "drives direction" is mostly a trust conversion. You already have the easy part. What people underestimate is that driving direction does not mean being louder or more opinionated in meetings. It means picking a few things you're willing to have a real point of view on, being able to defend that view with evidence, and being okay with the possibility that you're wrong and will adjust.

The practical version: pick one ambiguous problem your team has been circling on and write a concrete proposal for it. Not a deck, not a polished doc, just "here's what I think we should do and why, what are we missing." Share it, take the pushback, refine. Do this three or four times and people start bringing problems to you instead of the reverse.

The going with the flow years are not wasted. You've absorbed a ton about how large orgs actually work, what fights are winnable, which ones are not. That context is what makes a good technical direction setter. The switch is just deciding you're going to use it.

Wide-Pop6050@reddit

You just have to dive into these things. If they're pushing you to do it they see the potential. Don't get hung up on things like team size or being younger. I've always been the youngest. Even now at work I actively avoid mentioning exactly when I went to college or things like that.

This seems like a good opportunity to get your feet wet and see if you like managing.

Why do you thik speaking up would make everyone hate you?

Agree with the other books recommended. I also really liked Radical Candor.