As a Parent Have You Ever Been Good Friends With your Kids Mates Parents But The Kids Fell Out?
Posted by CapitalWatchClub@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 14 comments
So as the title says have you been friends with a couple because your kids are mates but the kids fell out or no longer see eachother how did you deal with it?
PoinkPoinkPoink@reddit
My parents were great friends with my brothers best friends parents. My brother and his friend are no longer friends, but our parents are closer than ever, go on holidays together, are very involved in each others lives. It’s been many years but I don’t remember it ever being awkward.
CapitalWatchClub@reddit (OP)
Oh coo good to know, were they junior school or secondary school mates?
PoinkPoinkPoink@reddit
From nursery right through to maybe year 9 when they sort of drifted apart as their interests changed, never really a falling out just a growing apart I guess.
aje0200@reddit
My parents still meet with the parents of a friend I’ve not seen since school over a decade ago.
WryAnthology@reddit
Yes. We were close friends for about 13 years but the kids fell out and are no longer friends.
As parents we're still close friends but it is different. I now feel awkward talking to the other mum about my kid as they're still in senior school together and not at all on good terms. I know the mum talks to her teen about everything, so I know that anything I tell her about my own kid will be reported back to her kid.
We used to talk a lot about what the kids were doing and our own worries and issues as parents. Now I feel like there's this whole gap about what we can talk about and this awkward feeling of all the things I can't say.
So it has changed things. We also used to do a lot of mutual hanging out - dinners where the kids would hang too, public holidays, etc.
The kids are old enough stay home now but she doesn't invite us over as much, which makes me feel a bit like some of our previous hanging out (from her side) was at least partially driven by her wanting someone to hang out with her kid.
So we are still close. Still friends. But it's not quite the same.
ProfPMJ-123@reddit
Yeah, that’s happened to me.
It doesn’t make any difference to the friendship I have with the other kids parents.
One of the things you learn quite quickly as a parent is that children are right daft bastards. Their emotional development is far from complete. You can’t let that dictate your life.
sin0shine0@reddit
Yes this, our kids fell out but we remain good friends. Our kids still don't really like each other but as long as there's no bullying and it's just general dislike for the other, we can live with it.
lavayuki@reddit
My parents were good friends with the parents of my brothers friends who were also our neighbours. Even though my brother is no longer friends with their son since they faded out as kids, my parents remained friends with the parents and still are, so like 30 years. Their dad always visits my dad.
My parents are also friends with this other couple who have a son and daughter who were previously good friends with me and my brother, but became enemies and we both hate them. But the parents remain friends and visit each other regularly.
My parents don’t seem to care if me and my brother fall out with friends, they keep the friendships with the parents if they are friends because other than the two I have mentioned, there are many more actually.
nikokazini@reddit
If you’re good friends, then there should be no reason why you don’t continue being good friends. Why would you not be friends just because the kids aren’t anymore?
Exemplar1968@reddit
Many, many times. Still friends 21 years later!
eternal_entropy@reddit
My husbands parents are great friends with his best friend from school. They still occasionally go on holiday together.
My husband however, has no desire to see his old friend. He classes the money he’s still owed from him as ‘worth it not to have to deal with him ever again”. Which is strong words from him as he’s generally very chill about people.
Ocean682@reddit
My mum and my ex best friend’s mum are no longer close. We went to my ex besties wedding last year and they saw each other after many years, hugged and briefly spoke but nothing past that.
I think once we stopped talking it trickled down to our parents. We have mutual friends and each other’s numbers hence the wedding invite but yh…
PsychologicalLayer57@reddit
Yes, I have. I kept my friendship with the other mum separate from the friendship between the kids. We happened to meet through our kids but we were friends because we were friends. We saw each other as grownups without the kids.Eventually the kids actually fell back in sync but the older they get the less they need you involved in their friendships anyway.
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