Someone ask me if I am good?
Posted by jari065@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 38 comments
It's been 2months of working in London. I'm an immigrant and I was surprise when a random co worker ask me "are you ok"? but when I say "No, I'm so tired" they were shocked/surprise by it?
But when I was just in the neighborhood we don't even do eye contact?
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liverpoolfuckingsuck@reddit
You should have just said ‘yeah fine thanks, you?’ When we ask in Britain we don’t actually want to know
CandourDinkumOil@reddit
I’d add that it’s not that we don’t want to know per se, it’s more of the fact that “you alright?” is more of a greeting like “hello” than a genuine question.
liverpoolfuckingsuck@reddit
Nah not me. I just don’t want to know lol. Part of integration is learning to bottle up your emotions
sub273@reddit
Which is why your response of “yeah, fine thanks” seems unnecessarily over the top when an understated “not bad” will suffice in 99% of scenarios.
Let’s not get all American and positive, eh? 😎
External-Praline-451@reddit
"Mustn't grumble"
liverpoolfuckingsuck@reddit
Too true. Far too chipper today, my bad chaps, I’ll reign it in
MightyDevOps@reddit
Bottle them up and have some good ol side effects in your 50's , I used to say , if you don't wanna know , don't even fake it
liverpoolfuckingsuck@reddit
Sounds dreamy I can’t lie.
MightyDevOps@reddit
You said you dont want to know , but you are a fake shit , at least I'm not doing any of that haha
A_Roll_of_the_Dice@reddit
Depends on the phrasing.
"Are you ok" generally means we do. Some variant of "alright" or "you alright?" Often means nothing more than a greeting.
Also depends a lot on the area/community, too.
ezyhunter@reddit
Unless its someone really close asking no one cares
arashi256@reddit
I cannot stress enough to our immigrant friends how this is not an earnest enquiry into your well-being but rather just a weirdly worded greeting. You could be visibly on fire and the response should still be some variation of "yeah, you?", "yeah, not too bad" or "can't complain, you?".
xDzerx@reddit
"could be worse" - I mean you could be dead tbh.
donalmacc@reddit
Honestly if you were dead and reanimated, I'd expect "yeah, you?" as a response
arashi256@reddit
Yeah, that one too. Sometimes I like to mix it up.
GamerGuyAlly@reddit
No British person will ever ask you earnestly if you are ok like that.
The real are you ok is "I'll put on brews" or similar tea related enquiries.
xDzerx@reddit
"you alright" is a form of greeting in the UK. We don't actually want your life story lol. The usual response is "Yeah fine you", "could be worse" or some such.
King0llie@reddit
Yeah mate living the dream
Ill_Tonight_2069@reddit
Cant smile wide enough
Funmachine@reddit
Did they ask "Are you okay?" or did they say "you okay?"
The former is likely a genuine question, the latter however is just a greeting ala "How do you do?" It's not a question asking about you are currently feeling.
OilAdministrative197@reddit
Yeah i use to love saying no and then seeing peoples faces. Funny asf like noone actually expects you to say it your supposed to say fine.
JennyW93@reddit
My favourite, when I was going through a fragile patch, was earnestly saying “fine, thanks!” And then immediately bursting into tears. That got some great looks
ttrsphil@reddit
Well, here you go. I’ll ask you sincerely: Are you OK?
bahumat42@reddit
Generally speaking are you ok is semi a greeting.
I wouldn't freely tell somebody if I wasn't good except for 2 scenarios.
1) they were actually a friend and concerned
2) if I was seriously struggling and needed to just talk to anyone.
Outside of those 2 I won't bother anyone with the specifics because they don't really want to know.
Jesssca@reddit
One “you okay” means hello, a second “are you really okay?” Is when they really wanna know if your okay and you thoughts and feelings.
PolarLocalCallingSvc@reddit
It depends how it is asked.
Often it's more of a greeting than a genuine enquiry. In this sense it's often shortened a bit to something like 'you'ok?' or 'ya'alright?'
If someone clearly pronounces the words 'are you ok' in a slower, softer tone, then it's more likely to be a genuine question.
I'm a little more obvious with it. If we're out on a long hike and I genuinely want to know if someone is ok, I ask, 'how are you feeling?' This is a clear genuine question which isn't usually just answered with 'fine yeah' if actually their feet are hurting or whatever!
MillsOnWheels7@reddit
"You ok?"
"Yeah. Sound mate, same shit, different day. You?"
"Yeah, sound. Living the dream."
hallerz87@reddit
What do you mean "But when I was just in the neighborhood we don't even do eye contact?" How does this relate to them being surprising by your answer?
Remote-Pool7787@reddit
You’re taking it too literally. It’s just another way of saying hello, they aren’t actually enquiring about your physical and emotional wellbeing
Sage-Freke-@reddit
You could do what everyone is suggesting or you could be honest with people and they might stop asking if you’re alright 😆
I’ve lived here all my life and still think it’s weird.
roskopeek@reddit
We often reply with the most depressing response we can muster and its taken perfectly normally....
Could be worse Been better Clinging on Well, I'm still alive Well i haven't had a live grenade inserted into my arse yet today
Last one may be a slight exaggeration.
Competitive_Rub_9590@reddit
They were just saying ‘you alright’ I think, it’s not literal
Hot_Fly_8684@reddit
The correct response is 'yeah, you?'
Alternative-Emu2000@reddit
In many contexts, "Are you OK?", "Are you alright?" etc are just generic greetings, not an actual enquiry into your well-being. They don't need a detailed answer, just something like "Yeah, you?" or "Alright?"
jadegoodyp@reddit
Just reply. "Yes mate, you alright?"
No one actually cares if you are ok. It's just a way of saying "hello"
Ok_Adhesiveness_8637@reddit
Took me a while to get this too mate, but in the UK if someone "asks" you if "your alright" or "you good", we dont actually want to know how you are, its just the way we say hi.
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