Do you take a number 2 in your hotel room or lobby?
Posted by lxlviperlxl@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 342 comments
Having a talk with my friend and he’s told me he’s never taken a shit in his hotel room toilet and would only do it in a lobby area so he doesn’t “contaminate” the air.
I find this weird and would only ever relieve myself in my own hotel bathroom were possible.
What do you guys do?
Confudled_Contractor@reddit
Yeah, your friend is a head case.
ukbot-nicolabot@reddit
A top level comment (one that is not a reply) should be a good faith and genuine attempt to answer the question
amboandy@reddit
His friend is Howard Hughes
geekroick@reddit
I said hop in
WrongExplanation1065@reddit
The spruce moose 🫎
amboandy@reddit
neilm1000@reddit
Howard Hughes would be using a milk bottle.
Snoo-84389@reddit
???
neilm1000@reddit
He stored urine in them during one of his 'gone a bit mad' phases.
Snoo-84389@reddit
Thank you for explaining that - I didn't really want to Google what i thought this response might be 😑
neilm1000@reddit
No worries. Yeah, its not something you necessarily want in your search history, lord alone knows what you'd get adverts for.
irishcybercolab@reddit
This is very true .. gross but true.
Chrolan1988@reddit
It’s the way of the future
imtheorangeycenter@reddit
Both crazy, I'll poo when I need to and use whatever is closest.
I don't mean a plant pot, though.
Gingerishidiot@reddit
His friend is talking shit
ThatBaldGuyIsHere@reddit
putting it politely there 😂💯
Generallyapathetic92@reddit
Or his shits are equivalent to biological warfare
Pedantichrist@reddit
Both, but my preference is my hotel room.
katlaki@reddit
Premier Inn will have to replan their layout, if your friend ever books a room there.
SassySasquatch27@reddit
Canny beat a lobby jobbie
Pircster38@reddit
Neither. I use the toilet provided (Rest Room or bathroom for our US friends) as doing it in the hotel room or the lobby seems a bit anti-social🦹
PigHillJimster@reddit
If I am with my wife she tells me to use the lobby toilet and not the room toilet because she doesn't want the smell!
stooduptoofast@reddit
What's wrong with the kettle?
Crazy-Bid4760@reddit
If I need to go, I will find the nearest toilet. I have no shame regarding my normal bodily function. A lot of people do though which is weird to me.
Crittenberger@reddit
I shit in whichever toilet is most convenient to me when I need to shit, other people's neuroses about when and where they go is ENDLESSLY baffling to me
bbwqween69@reddit
Ngl I'm not shy about pooping,my dodgy bowels don't allow me to be fussy, and so if i gotta go,I gotta go ,don't matter where the toilets located 😅
Street-Persimmon8492@reddit
If I'm sharing with someone I do actually often use the lobby ones especially when it's a nice hotel because they'll be clean. Just a bit uncomfortable having a turd while your friend or family member is sitting on the other side of the door
Imaginary-Put-7202@reddit
Too many responses before i read this, i do the same
TeamOfPups@reddit
Yep and me
wimpires@reddit
That's why you loudly proclaim "hey everyone I'm about to take a big shit" so they can leave if they do so wish. And then just run the tap to drown out the noise.
Street-Persimmon8492@reddit
Sure that's one option but my parents aren't young and if I'm staying with them it's easier for me to use the lobby on the way in than it is to turf them out the room
AdministrativeShip2@reddit
But dont you share a house and poop near them all the time?
Street-Persimmon8492@reddit
Yeah but my house isn't a one bedroom building and theyre not sat outside the toilet. It's the same as if there's a downstairs loo in a house and everyone's downstairs if I needed to go id go upstairs
Live-Motor-4000@reddit
Depends whether I’m sharing the room.
You could pack some Poo Pouri; I have a match book in my wash bag for such occasions
neilm1000@reddit
Can you still get match books?
Live-Motor-4000@reddit
I’ll take your comment on face value as I initially read it as you taking the piss.
I have a load of them I nabbed from a restaurant that I keep in the shitter. Or just buy a box of matches - or don’t, I don’t care as I can’t smell it from my house
neilm1000@reddit
I'm serious, I've not seen a matchbook in ages and I've not got a freebie in a hotel etc in even longer. I ask because I wouldn't mind having a couple but I don't want to walk around with a box.
IcyPuffin@reddit
The toilet in your hotel room has a door. Why would you not do a number 2 in thereif you needed to?
UndeadMurderess@reddit
You'd think so, but more and more hotels don't these days.
IcyPuffin@reddit
Seriously? They dont have doors? I think id be asking for reduced rate if they are going to provide rooms that are missing doors!
Dementia5768@reddit
The last Hilton hotel I stayed at with friends had a sliding frosted glass door for the toilet. You could still see what the person was doing in there. It also had a 1ft gap in the ceiling so all the noise and smell would float into the bedroom area since there's no fan.
We tried to use the lobby, which had normal stalls, for number 2 actvities.
CatFoodBeerAndGlue@reddit
What does he do at home? Go round to his neighbour's house every time he needs a shit?
TheCalRed@reddit
My wife always sends me to the hotel lobby for that, so that I don't leave unpleasant smells for her in the rest of the hotel room!
effinjamie@reddit
I bet she doesn't go to the lobby when she needs a shit
TheCalRed@reddit
I don't get it? She's a woman.
Everyone knows women don't poo, so that wouldn't be necessary.
Waste-Bathroom516@reddit
I bet she does!
TheMonkeyInCharge@reddit
Women don’t shit, don’t be silly.
AvidCoco@reddit
Taking a shit in a private hotel room bathroom after a long trip is one of the best things about taking long trips.
ljr69@reddit
Straight off the balcony while singing the dambusters tune.
melancholyy-scorpio@reddit
This is such a funny and British question lol.
Ill only ever go for a shit in public if I'm really desperate. As a child of someone with Crohn's disease I should absolutely know better to not be embarrassed about it, but alas, I can only shit in a bathroom that is my own, even temporarily. (And as long as my boyfriend cant hear me!)
Skoodledoo@reddit
100% the same without the Chron's issue. I have never shat in a public toilet. My body is so well trained that I never get the urge until I step foot through my door. If there is the possibility of someone being in earshot, my lower digestive tract shuts down like a DPD delivery man seeing a front door.
The__Pope_@reddit
So you miss out on the satisfying work shits where you take half an hour and get paid for it
Willing-Primary-9126@reddit
Heimscheißer - the Germans have their own word for you.
AwareCash8389@reddit
That’s amazing
ElPadero@reddit
I was not fond of shitting in public toilets… Until I was in a noise show in Miami and had to choose between getting in my car to find a gas station, shitting my pants, or shitting in the partially flooded disgusting toilet. I chose the disgusting toilet knowing I would not make it if I got in my car, shat with my tippy toes up and without fully dropping my pants. After that, my fear off public toilets completely disappeared. I welcome a public shit be it in the airport or a Tesco. However I will Not shit in a portable potty unless I’m tripping balls.
su2dv@reddit
So, lobby then?
External-Praline-451@reddit
I'm the same. Going away from home does bad things for my regularity!
ElPadero@reddit
I was not fond of shitting in public toilets… Until I was in a noise show in Miami and had to choose between getting in my car to find a gas station, shitting my pants, or shitting in the partially flooded disgusting toilet.
I chose the disgusting toilet knowing I would not make it if I got in my car, shat with my tippy toes up and without fully dripping my pants.
After that, my fear off public toilets completely disappeared. I welcome a public shit be it in the airport or a Tesco. However I will Not shit in sports potty unless I’m tripping balls.
NaturalTruth1374@reddit
Ummm...that's a bit weird. Just shut the door?
JustSpecial9102@reddit
If there is a door, you mean? 'Cause I saw hotel rooms where there wasn't an actual door that would separate the toilet from the room -- it's some weird design trend that is becoming increasingly common in modern hotels. Along with translucent glass walls between the room and the bathroom.
NaturalTruth1374@reddit
Oh yeah, they're the strangest things.
Lumpy_Benefit666@reddit
Ill shit in any toilet thats close by when i need a shit.
CryOld2986@reddit
More important question is where the hell does he go when not staying at a hotel ?
Status-Mousse5700@reddit
So does he shite at home or on the lawn
split-tennisball@reddit
Why would you go to a public toilet when you have your own?
TheMonkeyInCharge@reddit
Depends on the hotel. Good hotels keep lobby toilets spotless.
That said I wouldn’t use it over my room if staying alone, but I have trotted downstairs (or used the lobby one before heading up) when staying with the wife, if I think what needs to be done might make the room stink.
Asher-D@reddit
Yeah but regardless of how clean it is, it's still public. If I can help it I never want to use a stall especially if other people are in the bathroom. Not enough privacy.
Paulstan67@reddit
What do you do at home? Go around to a neighbours house?
0nce-Was-N0t@reddit
Behind a bush in the garden like other normal people
TheMonkeyInCharge@reddit
Exactly the same. Downstairs (family bathroom) is a free for all, I don’t stink up the en suite if someone is sleeping in the bedroom. Frankly if it’s so bad that I need to get up unexpectedly in the night for that, it’s not something I want to be doing near anyone else anyway.
scott94@reddit
At home most People don’t have 1 room and adjacent bathroom as their only escape.
ModTeam-@reddit
OPs mate just using the lobby area, not even public toilet..
Gingerishidiot@reddit
Well the alternative is to shit in his room
AlternativePrior9559@reddit
He does a jobby in the lobby
PorschephileGT3@reddit
I went to S Korea for work a few years back and the Intercontinental lobby shop was ROBBY.
I don’t take a jobby in the lobby Robby shop
museedarsey@reddit
But Bobby did
dommiichan@reddit
he should use the stairwell for privacy
peahair@reddit
The one who dealt it didn’t wanna smell(t) it.
Tiny-Spray-1820@reddit
I mean anybody can enter the lobby so technically they can use the toilet there as well
TMI2020@reddit
I remember a few years ago arriving at a hotel in Derby, and as I’m checking in I glance to my left and near the lift was a shit.
I said to the receptionist ‘there’s a turd there’. He scoffed and was like, sorry, what…I said someone has done a poo by the lift.
Could have been OP’s mate.
Splodge89@reddit
This comment has just had me giggling. Reminds me of the time on the isle of wight when I was a kid. We were in some maze thing, those made out of hedges, with my Grandad at blackgang chine theme park. Came across an actual human poo, complete with a little pile of tissues used to wipe next to it. When we eventually go out we told the theme park teenager, who at first didn't believe us, we ended up going back in to show him...
Paulstan67@reddit
Who is going to down their trollies near reception , drop a log , just to avoid a smell in your room?
And what does he wipe his arse with? Those shiny pamphlets for the open top bus tour?
BigBlueMountainStar@reddit
Laying the first brick, like Ali G
Moomoocaboob@reddit
Scoot across the entry mat I presume
PorschephileGT3@reddit
My rat dog just did this on the brand new hall carpet.
742963@reddit
Why use a public toilet or your own? When you have a perfectly fine public lobby? 🤯😅
Asher-D@reddit
If I have a choose, my own hotel room. If I'm desperate, we'll I'll go take what I can get.
FingersMartinez@reddit
I shit in a carrier bag and throw it out the window. Still get a bit of smell but it doesn't linger.
Constant_Lie_1888@reddit
I’ll take a shite anywhere so long as nobody’s watching and there’s enough bog roll
JustSpecial9102@reddit
If it's one of those ludicrously designed hotel rooms where there isn't an actual door between the room and the bathroom (I mean there's just a door opening without a door, and the toilet is behind a frosted glass screen inside the bathroom) then I can totally understand your friend. The smell (and the sounds) will inevitably spread to the entire room.
I had such a room in one of those all-included Turkish hotels. Luckily, I had the room all to myself, otherwise it would have been an extremely uncomfortable experience.
GeekerJ@reddit
Bowel cancer survivor here. Much prefer to shit in my own toilet. I used to have my own bag for a while which was handy. Could shit anywhere then. Not so compatible without some sports tho.
My wife has been through enough we me to not care how loud or stinky we shit. Everyone does it and it all smells bad. But you can close the door.
aredditusername69@reddit
I also chose this cancer survivors colostomy bag
Ok-Hamster-5263@reddit
Absofuckinglutely only in my hotel room. Lobby bathroom is not private enough!
SpectreSingh89@reddit
Own hotel room. Contamination is literally everywhere best we can do is clean up and wash hands.
badger906@reddit
I have ibs.. when I’ve got to go, I’ve got to go. I’ll shit in a sink if needs be
Due_Peak_6428@reddit
Your friend needs to educate himself about contaminants
Least-Funny7761@reddit
I regularly get thrown out of hotels for this one thing. Puts off guests checking in apparently
sacleocheater@reddit
I am taking a number 2 in my hotel room toilet as I write this.
CaptainChampion@reddit
How big is your mate's house that this is not a problem for him at home?
"Oh bother, I need to shit. I'll just jump in my golf cart and head to the east wing."
Key_Independence3770@reddit
No offence to him but your friend is a woke muppet
SpudFire@reddit
It's rare that we get an original question on this sub. Congratulations to your mate for being so fucking weird that his antics have created one.
PuzzleheadedCarob921@reddit
A friend doesn’t shit in the hotel room bathroom if he’s with his wife as he doesn’t want to stink the room out.
I found this amusing.
Super-Surround-4347@reddit
Just commented that I'm like this. Been with my wife for 10 years and married for four. I try to avoid shitting and smelling out a shared room.
In a hotel I'll say just popping out for a bottle of water/smoke/ ask reception something. Then I can take my time and come back.
I'd hate if we were watching TV together and she took a huge shit, stunk out the room then came to sit down again. If I could hear the noises too then that's just awful.
At least at home the bathroom is usually further away from the front room.
cardiffman100@reddit
This is just madness. What do you do at home? Go out to a public toilet for a shit?
Super-Surround-4347@reddit
It depends. In the morning I'll shit when I shower. My wife goes to bed early so usually if I need to again I can use downstairs toilet while she's asleep.
I don't know what she does, but I don't notice it. A few times I've said something like 'might have shave' or something of I need to during the day.
For the record, I don't think this is healthy. I'm just really uncomfortable by it. In some ways I respect people who just do it, I just can't.
tmr89@reddit
Just need the shit before you shower then the vapour will help mitigate and remove the smell
Dolphin_Spotter@reddit
Wait til he's been married for 40 years
GlancingGlow@reddit
Own hotel room. Though in a hostel the lobby bathroom is maybe a slightly better venue than the bathroom in the room.
AllTheThingsSheSays@reddit
What does he do if the hotel doesn't have a public toilet in the lobby?
International-You-13@reddit
I'd use the hot room toilet, and then ghost your friend.
Aware_Beat5301@reddit
Took me a minute that, though he shit in lobby's and everyone was OK with it. Go poo in your room dude, just go poo in your fucking room My goddddddd
Okhlahoma_Beat-Down@reddit
I'd only do it in the room. It's private and has an extractor, usually.
I'm assuming your friend is hopefully referring to a bathroom in the lobby, and not that he thinks dropping a fat log in the middle of the reception is a good idea.
haggis_catcher-@reddit
I usually shit in the kettle
waggywaggydogdog@reddit
If you ever find that you've shat in the kettle, DO NOT turn it on
Euphoric-Wall-2576@reddit
What's the point then?
qash001@reddit
This is the important bit.
Chrolan1988@reddit
Until you have added the piss you mean?
amboandy@reddit
It's the only way to sanitise, before popping it back up there.
ZealousidealArm9414@reddit
He needs to be put in a straight jacket, the only place to shit unless an emergency is in your living quarters.
Sxn747Strangers@reddit
Done both but I prefer my room so I can strip off and spread ‘em for the humongous bastard that’s coming out.
cardiffman100@reddit
This can be done in the lobby too
Caddy666@reddit
your friend is shitting in the lobby?
like just squatting in front of the reception desk curling one out?
Timely_Pattern3209@reddit
Neither, I use the toilet.
geekroick@reddit
When I needs to shit, I shits.
neilm1000@reddit
I've told this story on Reddit before, but when lived in Sheffield I was on a bus going through the Wicker. A chap ran out of a chicken shop, dropped his keks over a drain grate and crimped one off. Pulled his trousers up and went back in. It was over in about 30 seconds.
simmyawardwinner@reddit
chap, keks, crimped
BakuninsBarman@reddit
What3words: Buckingham Palaces’ downstairs bog
let_that_duck_out@reddit
And straight back to work.
playmaker1209@reddit
This is the most British sounding story I’ve ever heard.
cheflifecdf@reddit
Ye, school, supermarket, your nans house, everywhere!
smedsterwho@reddit
On the bed, on the floor On a towel by the door In the tub, in the car Up against the mini-bar
squirrrrrm@reddit
Why would you shit in my nans house
UnacceptableUse@reddit
I follow the mantra: jobby in the lobby, piss in the lift
TheMonkeyInCharge@reddit
When need shits, I sits.
qazk@reddit
Im with your friend 100%. Don’t want my room stinking especially if it one where the windows don’t open.
LeopardProof2817@reddit
I was away last year with the family and we had a 2 room suite thing and the bathroom had a frosted glass door off the main room the shower was round the corner but the toilet felt very much like sitting in the living room having a number 2. I found a toilet at the back of the resort that had next to no footfall, id just take myself off there when the need arose. Other than that, id normally be all about the toilet in the room.
boomtownrat84@reddit
Your friend needs help
Ok-Dark-Shroom79@reddit
I’d go straight to his room & take a shit
Sea_Line888@reddit
I’ve paid good money I’m shitting as often as I can in the room.
chuggggster@reddit
If I am in a small room with my wife and kids I sometimes go down to the lobby so as not to gas them out. But it all depends on the time of day tbh.
JobInitial4515@reddit
Room.
Staying in Canary Wharf Marriott for work. Dropped a monster in there and blocked it. Water filled the bowl as I flushed multiple times to try and move it. Was around midnight so figured I’d leave it and sort it out in the morning. Woke up to a water soaked carpet outside the bathroom, but magically the monster had disappeared.
Was quite an awkward conversation at reception the next morning, but this was just after lockdowns lifted so I was very grateful for the face mask…
The lady on reception was very gracious though, and they called me later that morning to let me know I could switch rooms. She mentioned something about the plumbing being bad in there, but I think she was just trying to spare me some dignity.
cryptonuggets1@reddit
When I stay with my partner she will go use the lobby because she shy ☺️but I’m fine with doing a dump right before she showers
Particular_Meeting57@reddit
The only reason I could see would be if you were trying to get laid.
Plum_Tea@reddit
"Do you take a number 2 in your hotel room or lobby?"
Who the hell takes in the room OR the lobby? I'd first think of using a TOILET to do it.
Sway_RL@reddit
Your friend is weird.
If you gotta go then you gotta go. Find a toilet and take a shit
Isgortio@reddit
I've done this when on a "romantic" weekend away, especially before being diagnosed with a bowel issue that made things not very pleasant. It felt weird to be like "I need the toilet I'm going to the lobby" but I think now I know the cause behind it I'd find it a lot easier to explain and do. There is a reason why I don't have an ensuite bathroom at home, I don't wanna sleep in pooland.
Upstairs-Quail5709@reddit
Bit unhygienic, surely the friend could use the toilet in the lobby rather than the lobby.....?
PlatJC@reddit
Shitting in a hotel is a highlight of life, your friend sucks.
Frap_Gadz@reddit
So your friend would rather go breathe the "contaminated" public shit air?
Does he shit at his house or go to the McDonald's down the street?
Kai_Harlow@reddit
I fully get where he’s coming from. And this thought has crossed my mind. But going to the lobby is a bit too much effort for me. Best solution is to just keep the door shut
burkeymonster@reddit
I dump in my main bathroom and don't use my em. Suite at home but in a hotel I use whatever toilet is closest.
Familiar9709@reddit
This only makes sense if you're sharing the room with others, then I can see the point of going to a toilet outside, so that you get more privacy, you can take as much time as you want and you obviously don't make the room smell.
tnmoo@reddit
I use the lobby toilet (my wife makes me) bc I eat a lot of meat… she didn’t want to have to smell my wonderful odor in the confines of the hotel room, along with the kids, lol.
I find peace and quiet too while I scroll on so it’s a win-win.
Volley-Boat@reddit
Where does he have a Tom Tit at home? Garden? Out the window?
autocorrect122@reddit
That awkward moment when your friend discovers that toilets have a lid that can be closed before flushing so shit's not contaminating the air
Dangerous-Web-1962@reddit
I will shit in any toilet, anywhere....
daniel_guillon@reddit
That’s crazy. I would happily shit in my hotel room bathroom.
Sufficient-Mess-6931@reddit
If it's a toilet, it's what it's there for 🤷🏻♀️
LinuxLover3113@reddit
Always jobby in the lobby.
BadBacksFuryToad@reddit
I use toilets
BrundleflyPr0@reddit
It’s the first thing I do; christen the toilet
SocialMThrow@reddit
I only ever shit in someone else's room because I don't want to contaminate the air in my room or the lobby which I have to walk through.
Renegade9582@reddit
Sure, straight in the bath even. 🤔
cardiffman100@reddit
Ah the good old waffle stomp
ServerLost@reddit
I have some terrible news for your friend about hotel hygiene.
oli_ramsay@reddit
Your friend is insane. I only poo the bath
eralcilrahc@reddit
Same and if they only have a shower it’s a waffle stomp
laurieb90@reddit
Generally I use the one in my hotel room, but there was an exception:
I went to Amsterdam and shared a hotel room with 2 other guys. The room had a toilet, but it was basically a cubicle inside the room with no ventilation and big gaps at the top and bottom of the door. The room also had no windows.
So, we decided it'd be best if we all used the downstairs toilet to make sure we woke up the next day
Effective-Design2378@reddit
Does he not shit in his own house?
SnooDonuts6494@reddit
I think your friend is a bit weird.
The one in my room is far less likely to be "contaminated" than a public toilet.
Also, millions live in flats (apartments) the size of a hotel room... what are they supposed to do?
DeadBallDescendant@reddit
Bloke needs sectioning.
osterlay@reddit
Lmao ‘contaminate’ the air is wild. Does that mean he doesn’t shit at home? Sounds like OCD to me.
I let it rip anywhere with a degree of privacy.
liltrex94@reddit
Wherever I need to. I'm a woman, I will poop wherever I need to.
CarterPFly@reddit
Im with your friend on this one, though only if sharing a. Room, on my own id use the room one. . If at all.possible I use the public one and I can usually find an out of the way quiet one in most hotels usually near the breakfast area outside of breakfast hours or in the buisness meeting rooms area.
the-bone-rat@reddit
Does your mate also go to a public toilet to shit rather than use him toilet at home?
eralcilrahc@reddit
He obviously knocks at his neighbours house and uses theirs
captain_crackerjack@reddit
On the plus side, he saves a fortune in shit tickets
UndeadMurderess@reddit
New favourite terminology unlocked!
Splodge89@reddit
I am also stealing this!
Berty_Puddlebottom@reddit
Depends how well I know who I'm sharing the hotel room with. Last time I definitely went to take a "call" outside and went to the lobby toilet because it was a bit soon for her to hear what I was gonna do in there.
mazrimtaim_@reddit
After being caught short with food intolerances when travelling and having to use very basic facilities, any fear of public loos is long gone. I’ll use a hotel lobby for convenience or if partner needs to use our room toilet. Hotel lobby’s usually keep the toilets super clean and no need to wait for elevator.
NoisyGog@reddit
Neither. I always use the en-suite bathroom or the public toilets.
Taking a shit in your room or in the middle of the lobby is insane.
not_microwave_safe@reddit
If I need a shit, I need a shit, and I don’t care which toilet will need to deal with the consequences of this.
WhatsThePlanPhil95@reddit
oh I go number 2 whenever I need to, I heard it's really unhealthy to like, keep them in
EqualPie515@reddit
But the lobby bathroom most likely is germier...?
thebarrcola@reddit
Does he just shit in the fucking garden at home?
Heavy-Locksmith-3767@reddit
Use the shower like a normal person.
Spiritual-Peach-4032@reddit
On my own - always the hotel room bathroom. In a shared room, depends on the bathroom and toilet situation - if it’s closed and well ventilated I’d use it, if not I’d use the lobby or go in the hotel room at a time when others weren’t around.
shebasmum49@reddit
As a Crohn's warrior, I go wherever there's a toilet.
Jassida@reddit
I’d only do a lobby jobby in an emergency
KingKhram@reddit
Does your mate even take a dump at their home or go out and find somewhere to take a dump?
Your mate is bonkers
thunder2132@reddit
I once went to Myrtle Beach. When we first got into our room I went pee, and the toilet wouldn't flush. I called for maintenance and he came in, spoke almost no english, and plungered the toilet. "You clog." he said. I said I just peed. He said "You poop. Poop clog." I told him again I just peed. He very quietly said "You poop." then left.
It was an experience for sure.
SirQuay@reddit
Which ever one is the closest. If I need it when walking into the hotel after being out, I'll use the lobby one. I'm not risking it coming out whilst trying desperately to get back to the room.
art-beer@reddit
First of the day after a hotel steak with a few ales and wine ... Yep that's getting checked out down by reception.
doepfersdungeon@reddit
A jobby in the lobby , call the Bobby Johnny or you'll all be sorry.
Dutch_Slim@reddit
Whichever is closer at the time I need to go
KeepMyselfAwake@reddit
I remember I sought out the public/general hotel access loos on a 6th form trip and I shared a room with my crush (same sex) and was too embarrassed to go in the ensuite. It also didn't help that the bathroom light didn't work! Similarly if I'm around people I'm not comfortable with on a trip I'd maybe seek out alternative loos or wait until people aren't around if I needed a number 2, but I think that's an anxiety thing. But generally speaking I would always use the room one, I don't think it would really cross my mind to go in the public loo when travelling alone or with someone I'm very comfortable with.
papercup@reddit
I haven't shat in anything but my own toilets or a hotel room toilet since 2011 (I had a string of traumatic shitting experiences).
Your friend is essentially my opposite
Total-System877@reddit
People get very childish about this shit. Stop fucking worrying about it. I only give a shit about shit problems when it's people with Crones or other legit issues.
Not_Mushroom_@reddit
Your friend is a knob.
Fellsy8@reddit
Huh? What does he do at home then? Does he only use the en suite for number 1s?
smedsterwho@reddit
Always in the hotel room.
But if I'm sharing with my girlfriend and we're both in there, yeah I've headed out into public
BrieflyVerbose@reddit
Surely it would just make more sense to just do a courtesy flush the moment it hits the water while using your own bathroom.
If you're that worried about smell then that would pretty much sort that out without having to put your arse on a seat that's seen multiple random arses that day (or since it was last cleaned)
Serious_Badger_4145@reddit
This is mad tbh. Does he always go at the same time? Cause what if you wake up and need a shit. Do you go to the lobby in your jammies
snapper1971@reddit
I always shit right by the check-in desk, especially at Travel lodges. Premier Inn always shit on the counter.
SmugglersParadise@reddit
So it may not be because of this...
But I was on holiday in Mexico years ago. I went to the toilet by the swimming pool, so a communal toilet.
The toilet water was VERY high. Anyway, there were probably some backsplashes
I was very ill the next day. Make of that what you will
Good evening Reddit
simmyawardwinner@reddit
didnt get the subtext at all
theevildjinn@reddit
When my son was about 10 we took him and his classmate to Alton Towers, the classmate's parents came along too. We stayed at a Premier Inn, with rooms across the corridor from one another.
I went and got us a Chinese takeaway, and the 6 of us sat together in the classmate's hotel room to eat it.
Suddenly I realised that there was a very strong smell of shit, and then turned around and saw their bathroom door was wide open. Then realised my son had just taken a dump in their toilet, instead of literally walking across the corridor to ours. Just as we were dishing the food out.
I was mortified. Not enough to suggest we should go and eat in our room, though.
simmyawardwinner@reddit
my cat does this everynight as i sit down and start eating, she waits all day when im out at work and saves it for dinner time :)
VandelSavagee@reddit
If i had to, I would probably do it in the hotel room tbh
Doing it in the lobby would get you kicked out i reckon
BCF13@reddit
A jobby in the lobby
Aggressive-Artist-63@reddit
Top class comment
-FantasticAdventure-@reddit
A faeces in the foyer
BillWilberforce@reddit
A shitter in the litter.
bindmedown2@reddit
Rabbit raisins in reception.
4x6x8@reddit
Voiding in the vestibule.
iwantmuscle@reddit
He's weird
kermitor@reddit
I'd shit in the lobby, make eye contact with anyone walking by.
Aggressive-Artist-63@reddit
I take personal pride in destroying my hotel room toilet! I’ve paid for the pleasure.
abyssal-isopod86@reddit
No, I shit in a toilet, why would I go in the room or I. The lobby in front of people?
Knowlesdinho@reddit
It's like the first thing I do when I get in the room.
Rich_27-@reddit
Got to Christen the room
Current_Fly9337@reddit
My ex used to say you have to shit, shower and shag to get your moneys worth.
captain_crackerjack@reddit
Marking your territory
Superb_Literature547@reddit
keep other preadtors away
miguelpess@reddit
Last year went on a Ski trip with 2 other friends. We were trying to save some money so we only got 1 room.
After the 1st day one of them took a massive dump. It took 2 days for the smell to dissappear.
Also, it did not help that the fan in the bathroom only worked when you had the room card in that little slot that gives electricity to the room.
Next time someone wanted to take a dump, they went to the hotel lobby.
RegretEasy8846@reddit
Jeez a hotel room toilet is unhygienic enough, I’m not going to make it worse by going to an even more publicly used one, in an openly shared area. Just crack a window open if it bothers you and do what’s humanly necessitated (not out the window!).
InstanceExcellent530@reddit
If sharing a room, then I'll use the lobby to save my companion's discomfort. If solo, luxuriate in my own miasma in the room. (I am absolutely rancid, btw)
neilm1000@reddit
Miasma is an excellent and underused word. You can see why people used to think disease was miasmatic.
InstanceExcellent530@reddit
I certainly can.
neilm1000@reddit
You definitely could in the pub gents I was unfortunate enough to be in at the weekend.
simmyawardwinner@reddit
lobby, my upcoming girl holiday our room is one of those modern cool ones where the bathroom has no door. yeah its not cool or modern it means we cant shit in peace :)
Suspicious_Steak_696@reddit
I’ll poo as and when I need. Wherever I like
ElectronicBenefit286@reddit
If I’m in a hotel and not staying alone in the room 100% I am doing a number 2 in the lobby!
If it’s just me in the room no problems.
But I do get it some hotels have terrible ventilation.
Outside_Assistance50@reddit
Your “friend” has issues.
Admiral-snackbaa@reddit
I do it in the reception
Zealousideal_Fold_60@reddit
the lobby 100%...
SeamasterCitizen@reddit
Wording, my friend, wording
greattimes99@reddit
That’s insane
dynze@reddit
sex workers chest
ammobandanna@reddit
When I need a shit I need a shit, your friend is an idiot
TheSJDRising@reddit
I do it in the lobby but I try and maintain eye contact with the receptionist whilst I do it.
Double points if it's a work event.
InternetPerson00@reddit
Does that mean he doesnt poop at home as to not contaminate the air in his home
random_username_96@reddit
I'd obviously go in my hotel room but I 100% would try to wait until close to leaving because most hotel bathrooms don't have windows and the extractor fan does a rubbish job of dissipating the jobby smell before it stinks out the rest of the room (yes, even with the door closed). So, I kinda get the struggle.
Imreallyadonut@reddit
I go with the bathroom,rather than the lobby or my room.
Foundation_Wrong@reddit
Definitely a toilet
Dru2021@reddit
Sharing the room - I’m using one of the public area ones.
On my own, setting up a mirror to watch the tv and poop with the door open
Super-Surround-4347@reddit
When staying with my wife, I share your friend's thought process. The hotel lobby toilets can be fantastic and private. I'll tell wife I'm just popping for a smoke, or find a reason to go to reception, then I can take my time.
I've been with my wife for 10 years but still don't like shitting in an en-suite we're sharing.
When I'm by myself I shit (often with door open) nearly as soon as I arrive in my own room. Simple joys of life.
Tumeni1959@reddit
But does your wife observe the same discipline?
Super-Surround-4347@reddit
As far as I know, yes. I haven't noticed anything (bar one case of norovirus but I'll let her have that one 🤣).
We don't discuss it and I haven't noticed at all. Maybe she does it when I'm on my walk.
_frank_tank@reddit
Every time I poo in the lobby, the concierge taps me on the shoulder, requests I stop immediately, and asks me to leave. Makes it a real challenge to pinch that brick.
Gary_BBGames@reddit
Out of respect to my wife and family I will poop in that lobby toilet. If I’m by myself I’m shitting exclusively in my rooms toilet.
Super-Surround-4347@reddit
🎯
TheJoeBloggs@reddit
When you say "in the lobby", do you mean literally doing a jobby in the lobby?
glitterswirl@reddit
Perhaps your friend needs to learn about courtesy flushes, flushing with the seat down, and leaving the extractor fan on.
Or bring some air freshener.
AdministrativeShip2@reddit
I'll do my Jobby in the hotel room I've paid for.
They have windows and fans and a door you can shut.
bananabastard@reddit
He'd rather take a shit in a public toilet than the private one he's paying for? Some mothers do 'ave 'em.
I_Speak_Guacanese@reddit
Jobby in the lobby, classic
neilm1000@reddit
You have all brightened my day. I've been cackling at this on the bus home and got some funny looks.
GanacheAffectionate@reddit
Lol how disgusting are his shits?
neilm1000@reddit
This is the big question here. Or big jobbie.
RandomPsychic20@reddit
Would your friend not use an en-suite in a normal house?
Kerry22022@reddit
Where ever is the most private...so preferably the hotel bathroom, but if the family is in the adjoining room and it's quiet, and if the WC in the lobby is empty I'd choose there.
Does your mate not poo in his own WC or bathroom at home then, for fear of polluting the air?!
They do say to shut the lid for better hygiene but your mate seems a little extreme about it.
Second_Guess_25@reddit
sheepandlambs@reddit
By this same logic, shouldn't your friend also not do it in their own loo at home?
Inside-Sprinkles3235@reddit
The room! I drink lots of coffee and orange juice at breakfast then go have a lie down in the room for half an hour until I’m ready to drop the kids off at the pool. Couldn’t relax for the day until it happened!
Away-Activity-469@reddit
Hotel room. I like to get my money's worth, so shit in a drawer and wipe my arse with the curtains.
jvlomax@reddit
Rhododendron outside the lobby bar.
Gullflyinghigh@reddit
Firstly, I'd find a slightly more sane friend. Secondly, I'm going wherever's nearest when the urge hits.
snowdrop0901@reddit
Good poop ehh either
Bad poop lobby
Just got to the hotel....lobby
Just leaving the hotel....room
Evil poop...room, need to be alone.
kaisey212@reddit
Tell him he’s missing out. When I go to a new country it’s the first thing on my lists a sort of plant my flag… or leave my mark 😅. Messing on the last part, I really don’t understand people who don’t clean up after themselves. Anyhow re your friend, I think it’s quite common to have strange toilet habits, we just don’t talk about it. My “friend” couldn’t do that business for a long time unless he was fully nude.
Natural_Peak_5587@reddit
Depends if you are sharing the room with others. If so (and they aren’t your immediate family), lobby is more polite.
Diligent-Worth-2019@reddit
I do them in the lobby now to stop my kids crying
LuinAelin@reddit
On the front desk
ZaharaWiggum@reddit
Only in Greece.
ThatNiceDrShipman@reddit
I too jobbie in the lobby. On the floor, while maintaining eye contact with the concierge.
Jealous_Problem356@reddit
I think taking a shit in a hotel lobby area is possibly likely to attract the attention of hotel security. Probably mid-log!
Where does he shit at home? The bottom of the garden, with the dog?
_Permanent_Marker_@reddit
I try not to take a shit in public restrooms. But if I pay for a hotel you best believe I’m getting my monies worth.
muddman67@reddit
Where does he shi*t at home, in the garden not to effect the air in the house??
ScreamingDizzBuster@reddit
If I'm sharing the room I will take a courtesy lobby jobbie.
TheMonkeyInCharge@reddit
Stealing this turn of phrase, cheers chuck.
fuzzelduckthethird@reddit
The lobby. Doing it in the hotel room puts the hooker off her rhythm
GrahamGreed@reddit
You can just pay extra for that.
6-foot-under@reddit
What does he do at home? And by extension, why does he treat his home's air worse than a hotel's?
tiorzol@reddit
Digs a hole in the garden
Illustrious-Divide95@reddit
If I'm with my partner i prefer the lobby. On my own I couldn't care
Weaubleau@reddit
I like to do it in the ice bucket and then sit it out in the hall.
HatOfFlavour@reddit
They're entitled to their odd opinion, the world would be boring if we were all the same. But sometimes you get caught short, or need to poop at night, or get some local stomach bug and need to get naked for a proper wide legged power stance. It's hard to get away with those in the lobby.
ElPadero@reddit
I use the hotel lobby toilet of the hotel across the street from the hotel I’m staying at.
Same at home, I never shit at my Home toilet to avoid contaminating the air, I always go to the 24 hour Tesco that’s close by.
TheClnl@reddit
Same, I live near an airport so I'll go there. It's annoying when the only flights are long haul but it's worth it to avoid contaminating my county.
National-Somewhere26@reddit
Just close the bathroom door in the hotel room the extractor fan clears everything fast 🤣
Old_Crow_5646@reddit
That's why I excrete into some toilet roll, gently package it up and sell it. No takers, into the street bin it goes. Job done.
KryptonionNipple@reddit
I don't care where I am if I need the toilet I need the toilet. Number one, number two, if it wants out it gotta go out 😅 I cannae hold it
ukbakeslotsofcakes@reddit
You have a choice? My constitution gives me about 2mins notice (sometimes far less). I’ll poop in the closest loo
CozJeez85@reddit
Always in the ensuite, unless I'm sharing with a friend and can manage to do it in the hotel lobby facilities.
ManicPixiRiotGrrrl@reddit
if it’s a hostel style room with friends, then the lobby. if it’s a hotel room with my partner then the room.
morebob12@reddit
So by that logic they definitely wouldn’t shit in their own house then
louse_yer_pints@reddit
I try to avoid having a dump in the room when I'm away with my wife but solo travels I use the room toilet.
MCRN10379558@reddit
The air in the bathrooms of most hotels is being vented continuously at a low level.
That’s why if you ever take a shower, even if you don’t have a fan switch, you’ll notice it doesn’t stay too steamy in there for very long. Come back in an hour or two and it seems pretty dry in there.
Relevant_Swimming511@reddit
I shit everywhere
ThickTadpole3742@reddit
So.....what does he do when he's home? Nip down the road and use the public bogs?
MiniCale@reddit
I get the idea but half of the reason for getting a hotel room is being able to shit in comfort.
Weird-End5410@reddit
Always in the lobby. If I can nip it long enough I try and find the toilet down there first.
i_jizz_nails@reddit
Prefer the kettle
Reesy@reddit
I usually knock on the next door and try and strike up a quick convo and ask to use theirs
GojuSuzi@reddit
I crap where I won't get arrested for doing so, nothing deeper.
Though I did hotel work, and it was pretty common for folk to avoid shitting in their own rooms because they didn't want it to be obvious to staff that they're the ones who dropped a massive honker; better to do it in the restaurant loos and have the culprit remain a mystery (even though we always knew, like, we see you scurrying and can put two and two together just fine, but if you need that denial rock on I guess).
210poyo@reddit
At this point do an aqua dump, n plop one in the pool.
Itchy-Pumpkin31@reddit
As long as he doesn't do it in the kettle.
Basic-Pangolin553@reddit
Hotel bathrooms have air extraction so the air comes from the room into the bathroom only
Cult-Film-Fan-999@reddit
Private toilet over public toilet everytime (if I can obviously). If you live near a shopping centre would you shit there rather than at home?
OrbitingPlanetArse@reddit
I cleaned hotel rooms over a summer 30 years ago.
You can be assured we have cleaned any room for a guest very thoroughly, because frankly the state some of them were left in defied all belief.
Triordie@reddit
Your friend is a moron
OneSufficientFace@reddit
Its the first thing i do. Gotta christan the toilet
Moppo_@reddit
If I need one, I use the toilet in my hotel room. Usually, though, "traveller's constipation" has other plans for me.
Tuarangi@reddit
Hotel solo, or with partner, hotel room. been together over 20 years, it's just human functions
In the rare occasions I have had a twin I've actively looked for an external toilet out of politeness, was forced to use the bathroom last time as the loos down in the breakfast area were all out of order
AdministrativeTea500@reddit
What does he do at home?
Unusual_Martian1@reddit
I go to the nearest toilet whenever I need to go. I woukdnt go from my hotel room down to the lobby when I need the loo
Persona_Insomnia@reddit
How toxic is your friends shits if he is polluting his entire hotel room. He need to learn to flush.
Acceptable_Hope_6475@reddit
In a posh hotel in Budapest I did my 2 in the lobby toilet as it had birdsong playing it was tranquil
captain_crackerjack@reddit
Selfcare
GuybrushFunkwood@reddit
Does he store jam jars of his own piss by any chance?
iffyClyro@reddit
I tend to stay in hotels with my wife. Treat the hotel bathroom like the en-suite at home. No solids.
Keep romance alive, don’t gas out your wife.
Mikon_Youji@reddit
So instead of keeping the stink to your hotel room you would make other guests smell it instead? Lovely
Return_Cultural@reddit
Personally, I wouldn't take one. Id leave it.
Standard_Response_43@reddit
Hotel room obviously.
If I'm in a hotel there is a good chance I've drank and eaten plenty.
liverpoolfuckingsuck@reddit
I only take a shite in your mates room
captain_crackerjack@reddit
This guy toilets
Electronic-Fennel828@reddit
If I need the toilet, I use the toilet. That’s kind of what they’re for. I don’t really think about it beyond that.
strodey123@reddit
Unless you get off to shitting next to somebody else shitting, I don't get why anyone would ever want to do this haha
Electronic-Stay-2369@reddit
Bit unfair on the poor receptionists if he dumps in the lobby. WTF does he do at home?
read2live2today@reddit
That's totally loony
johnlewisdesign@reddit
Just wherever it needs to happen IMHO...everybody does it!
I'd rather punish myself than the rest of the guests so would opt for the room over the lobby if feasible. That does seem weird. But each to their own I guess!
geeered@reddit
It turns out laying one out on the bellhop's cart isn't considered socially acceptable. So I stick to the toilet in my room rather than using the lobby now.
cognitiveglitch@reddit
From now on I'm only going to take a dump in your friend's room. The bathroom bit if he's lucky.
TorstedTheUnobliged@reddit
I do mine in your mates hotel room.
Rh-27@reddit
Your mate is a bit odd.
Mysterious_County154@reddit
I'll do it in the toilet in the room
I felt dirty just going into a hotel reception bathroom to wash my hands
dragongirl_3@reddit
Very rarely. Only if I'm alone, it's stupid because my husband stinks the place out as and when, but I physically can't do it. I go downstairs and use the public toilet.
TheBrightestSunshine@reddit
Sink. Or kettle.
PootMcGroot@reddit
I think this is the opposite of most human beings.
5h0D10n@reddit
What the fuck am I reading 😂 poo in the room toilet I don’t pay for on suite facilities and not use them!
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