Today's ration: pizza again, with a soft undercooked crust, pepperoni, and the last of my pickled jalapenos from 2022
Posted by elonmusktheturd22@reddit | shittyfoodporn | View on Reddit | 111 comments
I spaced the toppings out so its easier to cut into 6 slices. Its fully cooked despite what it looks like. This is the last time i will post a pizza like this for a while because this is the last of the pickled pizza toppings in my pantry. I gotta grow more stuff, have a crop in the summer to harvest, then pickle, soonest i might do another is September.
Heavy cloud cover and rain, too dark in my shack, took picture on the porch.
UnhappyBrief6227@reddit
Why undercooked crust?
Original_Head_3487@reddit
Interesting. Pizza cooked rare.
ProgenitorOfMidnight@reddit
Am I on the right sub??? Not a fucking but of that pizza belongs here, that is fucking art bro!
PunkMothman@reddit
i love slightly undercooked pizza man im right there with ya!
LatterParty182@reddit
I crave pizza
Jeramy_Jones@reddit
Good to see another ration post. Hope you’re doing well.
Xlbowlofpho@reddit
Put it back in the oven bro
mrjabrony@reddit
OP cooked that pizza by telling it the story of how cavemen invented fire
plan1gale@reddit
Cooked by the light of Sirius B
thelectricrain@reddit
Dude has no oven lol
slashinhobo1@reddit
how did you manage to cook the toppings and not the bread? Slow cook the pizza at 100 degrees for 3 hrs?
Tha_REAL_BROBS@reddit
It’s so white
meat_thistle@reddit
Like my ex wife would say “can’t ya stick it in the oven for any longer than four minutes?”
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Tomorrow will be bread sticks Thursday and Friday will be ham dinner Saturday will be bean salad
Sunday will be stroganoff Monday and Tuesday will be stuffing, cranberry sauce, and mixed vegetables Wednesday and Thursday will be ham dinner Friday and Saturday will be chicken noodle pot
Sunday and Monday will be ham dinner again Tuesday will be open top apple pie Wednesday and Thursday will be chicken noodle pot again
Then it will be May
caelum_daemon@reddit
I wish i could meal prep this well.
SanestExile@reddit
I've never planned so far ahead in my life lol
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
My rations have been planned out through early June actually
May 1: undecided,
2, 3, 4 cheese and garlic quesadillas
5-6 beans and rice
7 open top apple pie
8-9 ham dinner
10 besn and rice
11-12 chicken noodle pot
13 open top apple pie
14-15 corned beef hash and eggs
16 beans and rice
17-18 stuffing, cranberry sauce, mixed vegetables
19 stroganoff
20-21 bean salad
22 corned beef hash and eggs
23 bean salad
24-25 ham dinner
26 open top apple pie
27 corned beef hash and eggs
28-29 beans and rice
30 corned beef hash and eggs
31 beans and rice
June 1 beans and rice
2 corned beef hash and eggs
3 have not planned yet, in theory my earliest crops plus forage will be available so it becomes harder to make plans until October
g00gly0eyes@reddit
Blast it with the broiler for a few minutes and it's golden
Nightbird88@reddit
Based on the dough and cheese your oven temp isnt high enough.
moader@reddit
How do you like un cooked raw pizza
Anubis-Hound@reddit
I'm going to pretend you put in back in the oven after you posted this bc undercooked Pizza makes me upset
phredbull@reddit
100%
Jopkins@reddit
"It's fully cooked despite not being fully cooked"
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Its cooked, my crappy camera doesn't take very good pictures showing it
Jopkins@reddit
What's the eighth word of your title, fella?
phredbull@reddit
At this point I'm assuming OP took it out of the oven & took a pic for Reddit karma then put it back in to actually eat.
phredbull@reddit
Pulling it from the oven looking like that is on you OP.
DoubleDeckerz@reddit
Base was baked in the heat of the moment.
TheHivemind56@reddit
I wish I could buy you another jar of jalapenos.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
These were homegrown and home canned
ICameHereForTheBoobs@reddit
What’s your dough recipe? The thickness is amazing 🙌🏻
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
3 cups of flour, 2 tablespoons olive oil, 2-3 tablespoons of brown sugar, about 1 cup of water, a pinch of yeast, a tablespoon of garlic powder.
I mix it around 5-6 hours before i plan to use it, a wet dough, cover the mixing bowl with a scrap of plastic from a cut up bread bag, held down with a plate so it won't come off . Set it in a warm spot.
I grease the pan with crisco them spread the wet dough out, no kneeding after the initial mix.
I spoon out 2 more spoons of oil around the center, then add sauce, basil, the shredded cheese, then toppings. Put in oven at 400f for about 15 minutes until the dough is firm. Usually smells done. I sometimes leave it another 5-10 minutes and it doesn't get any darker, the bottom burns black but the tops still whiteish.
Verix19@reddit
Sorry, that's just raw pizza.
musicankane@reddit
Food poisoning is on the menu boys!
JetstreamGW@reddit
… food poisoning from what? A pickled veggie? Cured meat?
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
You’re almost there!
What’s the other ingredient that OP specifically said was undercooked?
JetstreamGW@reddit
Oh please, the crust is cooked, it’s just not dark. And flour’s risk of carrying any pathogens is significantly overstated. You’re more likely to get sick from lettuce, which we usually serve raw.
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
So you did know what the other commenter was talking about!
You were just being a little dickling for the attention. I knew it.
_10032@reddit
I think you must just be a bit 'tarded
shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit
Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.
Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
Your opinion means very little to me
_10032@reddit
Yet you replied.
checkmate bud
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
You seemed like you needed someone to vent to. I volunteer for teens from troubled homes.
_10032@reddit
rip those kids
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
There, there. Let it all out. The usage of slurs tells me you’re hurting inside.
I can take it. Tell me what’s hurting you? 😢
_10032@reddit
are you high, or just really weird?
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
There’s more anger. Your hurt must run deep.
It’s okay. You can keep raging. I’m here for you, bubby.
lambsauce69ramsy@reddit
Usually?
squeakytea@reddit
Stir fried lettuce is very good!!
https://thewoksoflife.com/stir-fried-lettuce/
EleventyElevens@reddit
Saw a recipe for lettuce soup the other day. There are dozens! Will have to try this year.
lambsauce69ramsy@reddit
Let me know what happens
DramaOnDisplay@reddit
He specifically says in the description that it’s fully cooked despite it’s appearance. It just looks undercooked.
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
He also calls it undercooked in the title.
I’m going to trust my eyes.
triatticus@reddit
You know that pizza dough doesn't require eggs right?
Miserable_Mail_5741@reddit
Doesn't raw/undercooked flour carry its own risks?
triatticus@reddit
For some reason I wasn't thinking about that one, I guess it's fairly common to want to blame eggs and such in my mind.
ShootLucy@reddit
You can get salmonella from raw flour (Not saying the dough in picture is raw enough for that- but misconception about what makes you sick from raw cookie dough is the eggs. It's also the flour!)
Talk-O-Boy@reddit
You know that undercooked flour is dangerous on its own, right?
Source for the ignorantly indignant
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Naw, i only get that when i eat dsy old woodchuck off the roadside
JerryMau5@reddit
ACcbe1986@reddit
It's amazing how a look can make one rethink things.
Particular_Ad3366@reddit
Cooked under a heated discussion
Vallkyrie@reddit
This was prepared over a heated argument.
TheMasterFlash@reddit
Toppings are fine, undercooking the crust on purpose is a hate crime
rakondo@reddit
At least some butter on the outside 😩
MrBlueW@reddit
I’m just pulling this out of my ass but it might be easier for him to eat it this way.
donkeyrocket@reddit
I can't really think of an issue where pizza could be eaten but fully cooking the crust would make it prohibitive. Even so, it could be cooked a bit longer to, you know, cook the crust without going so far it's too tough and chewy.
MrBlueW@reddit
Well with all your assumptions clearly this is what works for him.
SanestExile@reddit
r/pizzacrimes
UnderstandingWeak292@reddit
Undercooked cheese too
Awkward-Audience7887@reddit
Why you hate hot oven?
Fuzzy-Produce104@reddit
Looks good. I love jalapeno on pizza
flippingisfun@reddit
Pepperoni and jalapeño is such a good combo I always wonder why more people don’t do it
iamadirtyrockstar@reddit
The cheese isn't even fully cooked, no wonder why the crust isn't done. More time in the oven is all you need.
FollowingJealous7490@reddit
Did you microwave it for 30 seconds?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
I don't remember ever owning a microwave, i may have around 2006, but if i did it was used so rarely that i can't really recall it.
zugarrette@reddit
Nice, I have been missing your additions to this sub. Enjoy!
WiseRisk@reddit
This… was before you cooked it, right..?
thedoomloop@reddit
Hope you and the pets have a great pizza day!
skronk61@reddit
Did you just leave it out in the sun?
mattycbro@reddit
You need to cook it dude
jbblog84@reddit
Why you no cook pizza?
DaprasDaMonk@reddit
You know you can make a brick oven with bricks some wet cement and coals and a rack
gibbonsons@reddit
I've actually never seen such thoughtful topping distribution. Good move there. I mean you're only sharing it with yourself but at least your later self won't be disappointed.
Piccadil_io@reddit
People need to read a bit more before commenting
ACcbe1986@reddit
Why underbake? Is it a preference? Does the crust end up softer or something?
lambsauce69ramsy@reddit
Its a very nice looking pizza nice shape the crust looks nice and even, its just i would be itching to put it back for 1-2 minutes It needs more cooking.. this neglect.
03dumbdumb@reddit
Disgusting
thumbscrolllord@reddit
I'd eat it
ReapingRaichu@reddit
Bro is speed running ecoli
Bulls_On_A_Guerrilla@reddit
It's fully cooked on the bottom? Like a browned bottom? If so switch that shit to briol for a min or two
Fit-Initiative3958@reddit
gotta say, that pizza looks kinda comfy lol. pickled jalapenos make everything better, can't wait to see what you come up with next when the crops come in!
bajablastn@reddit
Don’t be so hard on yourself bud, you can make whatever food you like. I’d try a slice
Fit-Initiative3958@reddit
gotta say, that pizza looks kinda comfy lol. pickled jalapenos make everything better, can't wait to see what you come up with next when the crops come in!
JesusTron6000@reddit
Even when you could have normal food, you gotta go and undercook it.
At this point this I’m convinced this is just love of the game with your Choices.
LaRreinaa@reddit
Shut up
Fibercake@reddit
My mans got fucked teeth, let my bro enjoy pizza any way he can
JesusTron6000@reddit
Well shit, that makes more sense! Okaaaaay fine!
Fibercake@reddit
Good lad! I absolve you of your sins.
gbeamer7@reddit
r/PizzaCrimes
LaRreinaa@reddit
Delicious!!
NortonBurns@reddit
Even the pepperoni & cheese looks like it could do with another couple of minutes.
The crust looks like you hate yourself.
katblondeD@reddit
Under….cooked dough?
Sad_Inevitable7415@reddit
This pizza looks delicious. pickled jalapenos are such a game changer on pizza. Hope your harvest comes through big time!
veebasaur@reddit
Pickled banana peppers are great too. Pickle pizza is a win :)
EncrustedBarboach@reddit
Wrong sub, how is this shittyfoodporn?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
A lot of people hate the color of my pizzas, or lack there of
ackshee@reddit
Shhhh. OP's posts are a staple in this sub.
Insanely_Mclean@reddit
Belongs in r/pizzacrimes
5k1895@reddit
Why not cook longer
EitherChain7966@reddit
not gonna lie, that pizza looks kinda comforting in a weird way lol, pickled jalapenos sound like they could hit just right... hope ur harvest comes through, can't wait to see what you whip up next!