What's the right way to eat a Greggs cream slice ?
Posted by Sad-Muscle5148@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 99 comments
[removed]
Posted by Sad-Muscle5148@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 99 comments
[removed]
GrabbedByTheGhost@reddit
Knife and fork, otherwise that cream stuff is going everywhere
TheDawiWhisperer@reddit
Heather brooks it
SgtBushMonkey69@reddit
Just put them in your mouth and suck em
dartiss@reddit
Slide it into the mouth like a CD going into a slot loading player. Then push the final half in, filling your entire cheeks. Make sure to grin inanely afterwards, showing off the contents of your mouth.
666sonicboom666@reddit
Take the top off then eat the bottom part first then eat the top part that's how I eat them anyways
Boulder_Brock@reddit
Open mouth and put it in
Only_Tip9560@reddit
Rotate by 90 degrees.
AlexisOnren@reddit
i usually eat them in reverse, i call it a creampie
Gornal-Annie6133@reddit
Squish it down, give the surplus to the dog and eat it as a flat wafer type thingy.
Leftleaningdadbod@reddit
Give it here, I’ll show you.
AppropriatePurpose36@reddit
Take the top off, put it underneath, (almost) mess free eating
spookystarbuck11@reddit
Oooh! I like this idea!
PurplePeso@reddit
Just flip the top over.
blarfblarf@reddit
Almost the opposite of the cupcake sandwich manoeuvre, genius.
MaleFeministActuary@reddit
I've never seen one of those before, is a Greggs similar to a GAIL's bakery?
ayyyybee167@reddit
Found the foreigner
cyanicpsion@reddit
Rotate it by 90 degrees so you're eating it sideways.
Also, the right way is with your mouth. If you are doing it any other way we do not need to see pictures
Fandangojango@reddit
This is how I would do it. Lie it on its side, cut it into smaller pieces - about 1.5-2cm, cutting from one side to the other. This is what I used to do with the Tesco value frozen cream slices - bloody loved those things!!
AdMaleficent6813@reddit
Who's got a knife and plate in the van though.
ApprehensiveKey1469@reddit
https://share.google/DwN9TZR8Pi7VjyDut
If you are stuck in van then use cutlery to reduce your cancer risk.
Wide_Ad_8365@reddit
I here by diagnose you with autism 🙏
Complex-Honeydew-111@reddit
That's a custard slice surely?
Difficult_Bad1064@reddit
It's brie
MaleFeministActuary@reddit
Butter
Wide_Ad_8365@reddit
Butter yes. Butter put it in the bin.
Wide_Ad_8365@reddit
It's brie yes. Brie long in the bin
beavercleaver9000@reddit
Snot Block is the official terminology I believe
Hal_E_Tosis@reddit
I asked the queen this once, she said " shove it in ya gob"
Pedantichrist@reddit
In the bath.
Flaky_Ship4665@reddit
Try putting some of it, not all in your mouth and chew before swallowing. What were you doing before?
AdMaleficent6813@reddit
Sideways.
BigWhole3650@reddit
That looks more like a vanilla custard slice 👀
NervousBug7077@reddit
Orally
FredH3663@reddit
With great care, but it will still be messy
Aer0Sith1@reddit
Not in public.
Sad-Muscle5148@reddit (OP)
Lol
valkyrie8118@reddit
Amen
ihavetakenthebiscuit@reddit
That looks depressing
teethofgod@reddit
Whole. Like cartoon swallowing a fish
Marzipan_civil@reddit
Unhinge your jaw like a snake
imtheorangeycenter@reddit
I've still got a flip-top head Colgate sold me on.
WillSym@reddit
Sub doesn't allow gifs so mentally insert Kpop Demon Hunters deepthroating entire sushi roll clip.
imtheorangeycenter@reddit
Flatten it in situ, lick the custard off the wrapper like cheese from a cheeseburger, flick the pastry into a bin.
Call it "A Northern Toss" and qualify for the banquet on Great British Menu.
Capital-Clerk6452@reddit
Divide in half by cutting sideways through the custard. Eat the half with the flaky pastry base first, then finish off the side with the icing.
MidasToad@reddit
That would be ideal, but you can't put down the other half with the sticky icing on one side and custard underneath without losing custard or icing to your plate. So you have to eat the best icingy bit first.
Imreallyadonut@reddit
Remove icing and upper pastry slice, devour, then the custard and pastry, devour.
Jealous-Shallot-3071@reddit
Knife and fork on a plate. At home.
bowen7477@reddit
Next we'll teach you how to blink.
Cute_Direction_8500@reddit
I press the lid down so the custard pops out the side a little. Lick round the edges. Now I can eat it without custard spurting out
hairlikebrianmay@reddit
Off a brasses arse.
DullBite8164@reddit
There is no correct way. Chuck the ultra processed, ultra high sugar, ultra high fat, chemical tasting piece of crap in the bin. And buy something else that is actually food.
SmurfBiscuits@reddit
If it doesn’t end up all over your face like a madman’s shit, you’re doing it wrong.
repair-it@reddit
Sideways, it's the only way to eat a cream slice
Unable-Discount-9266@reddit
Take top off. Eat middle and bottom together. Eat the top.
CthulhusEvilTwin@reddit
Enthusiastically?
Shawn_The_Sheep777@reddit
Carefully
unnaturaldoings@reddit
with your mouth
MoominMai@reddit
For all the heathens - take a look at this video, 'how to eat a custard slice' https://share.google/fV8OuC0XFgw19S7b6
colinah87@reddit
Split it and then eat it like two separate slices
Eukonidor_Of_Arisia@reddit
Suspend it 20cm from the ceiling with string, then jump and bite. This must be done to the theme of Magnum P.I.
You award yourself fifty points for a full bite. Twenty five for a glancing nibble.
Lopsided_Snower@reddit
by buying one from an indepenent bakery, that actually tastes like a vanilla slice, that's our first step, man
Wide_Ad_8365@reddit
Typically I decide to set up a small corner of the store to smash it against the ground then consume it through my hair by completing a handstand and moving in a side to side way making sure none of the desert is left then I top it off by ordering a pastry randomly selected by flipping a coin. I then headbut that said pasty 45 times exactly then eat it in a unordinary manner while making grunting noises and to top that off I dip my feet in the milk container in the coffee area so I can soak up all the calcium I missed out consuming the cream slice via my hair. I then leave the store feeling most complete thanking the store members for this terrific experience of pleasure. I then go back inside do a little jump and a 175 degree turn 2 times to the right 3 to the left pull down my trousers and walk back out of the store backwards while chanting the national anthem of Germany feeling utmost humane.
prustage@reddit
Turn it axially through 90 degrees so that the pastry is on the left and right sides and the custard runs from top to bottom. Then bite down so the side teeth bite into the pastry and the front teeth bites into the custard. Use a plate to catch crumbs.
SeaworthinessNeat516@reddit
Slurp custard out all the way around the sides until the volume of custard is reduced to a manageable amount then eat like a sandwich. Preferably do this next to a stranger on the bus. Make sure to sit in the aisle seat so they can't escape and must bear witness.
bradpitt3@reddit
Use a knife to cut it into quarters and then the pieces fit in my gob.
Wide_Ad_8365@reddit
The little station where you put sugar in your coffee has a hole you put these in where they belong. I think it might be labelled general waste whatever that means.
No-Temperature-7195@reddit
Like a demon
Codders94@reddit
Legit looks like a slice of Brie
Anon_on_internet@reddit
You turn it upside down, holding it carefully between the finger-tips of your non-dominant hand.
Carefully peel off the base and eat it.
Then you can chomp through the rest (still upside down).
I've been eating cream/custard.vanilla/whatever slices like this for many years :)
Slobbadobbavich@reddit
turn it on its side, make 4 cuts so it is 5 slices of goodness. Eat each piece like a king.
JBB2002902@reddit
With zero dignity, shame or regrets.
sin0shine0@reddit
I take off the top and eat it, then use my tongue or fingers to eat and scoop the middle, then lick the bottom part before I eat that. I don't care who is watching I am enjoying my food.
Return_Cultural@reddit
I absorb through my skin.
matmah@reddit
In the bath with a glass of wine!
Namaste_Life@reddit
The noisier the better.
GoodTato@reddit
Swallow it whole.
MidnightRambler87@reddit
The only sensible answer.
Two bites dependent on mouth size, don’t go getting lockjaw.
GoodTato@reddit
Yeah not exactly whole but... Whole thing goes in, maybe your throat breaks it but you aren't consciously "taking a bite"
Interesting_Branch43@reddit
Abysmal
New_Mindset1@reddit
Naked.
MaxximumB@reddit
Messily
Jolly_Psychology_506@reddit
All over ya face
Tonybham01@reddit
If you don’t know, you don’t deserve one. Hand it over!
Relative_Dimensions@reddit
Sideways. While making Cookie Monster noises.
Left-Incident620@reddit
Either you're being irreverent, or there are at least 2 of us then...
NecroVelcro@reddit
There's no right way to eat a custard slice. They're slimy, sickly shite.
RogueTyper@reddit
Where did you get this? I never see this in Greggs. Not that I want one...
Mysterious_Fox_8058@reddit
You have to do it methodically. You take a small bite, pushing some of the cream out of the sides. You then lick the cream that has spilled out from each side. Then repeat.
yiddoboy@reddit
Messily.
ferrarif50hunt@reddit
Cream slice?
Dreadheaddanski@reddit
Split it at the creme level and save icing side for last
wybird@reddit
Orally
Feeling-Bluebird8413@reddit
Boring
HotLyps@reddit
With a second cream slice next to it and a cup of coffee.
Or, if you want a dull answer - peel off the top layer, eat that, then set about the remainder - avoiding cream squirtage.
Tall_Stick5608@reddit
Rotate it as someone said sideways
TapeDeckSlick@reddit
By getting it absolutely everywhere
the_tartanunicorn@reddit
take the top off and eat it like a biscuit, then eat the rest. no mess
considerthec0c0nut@reddit
I always remove the top pastry layer by twisting it, trying to get as much of the cream/custard to stay attached as possible so I end up with two halves I can eat separately.
AutoModerator@reddit
Please help keep AskUK welcoming!
When replying to submission/post please make genuine efforts to answer the question given. Please no jokes, judgements, etc. If a post is marked 'Serious Answers Only' you may receive a ban for violating this rule.
Don't be a dick to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on.
This is a strictly no-politics subreddit!
Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules.
I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.