What do I do if my neighbour is harassing me about parking?

Posted by Burnatheburner@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 453 comments

So I bought my house in July last year and within a week of living there, my elderly neighbour had knocked on my door 3 times in one week to tell me I’m parking outside this persons house and they won’t be happy, then this persons house and they won’t be happy. I live on a street of terrace houses and I have a speed bump directly outside my house so I cannot park there. It’s a public road so I can park wherever I want obviously unless it’s blocking anyone’s drive, etc. She’s posted another letter through this morning. Saying that she’s having a delivery so we need to move our car from outside her house, even though she has a driveway and there’s room on the other side of her house for them to park. I honestly want to move house, it’s so incredibly aggravating. Can I even do anything about it? I’ve told her before it’s a public road, and anyone can park where they want to. My other neighbours have come to apologise to me because she’s told me that they’re angry at me for parking outside their houses when they’re not angry at me. She just is making problems for no reason and I don’t understand why. Any thoughts ? 😭

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453 Comments

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LaidBackLeopard@reddit

It's possible that you've been a bit too British so far. Tell her to fuck off.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

🤣 bit too British I like that one, I just feel bad because she’s elderly but as soon as I close the front door I’m like this behind it 🖕🏻🖕🏻

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when_music_hits@reddit

I had a similar neighbour who would try tugging on the heart strings of the person I was living at the time. I didn't realise the extent of it as I was always at work. One weekend I was home and the guy knocked in my door...I didn't answer so he rang the housemate to complain about me, my constant loud music(like i said i was always at work, so not possible). I went and knocked on his door and he tried the same tired old shit on me whilst trying to get me to go shopping for him...I gave him the benefit of the doubt once and went shopping for him, only for the cantankerous old cunt to tell me that most the shopping I'd got was wrong. I gave him his money back and the shopping list that showed he was lying, and told him to next disturb me or my housemate again. That stopped him...

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fotla@reddit

Be polite but firm next time she calls “Sorry, but it is not illegal to park in front of someone’s else’s house, this is a public road. I’m in the middle of something sorry, can’t chat.” And close the door. I assume given your age she is hoping she can intimidate you and make you feel like you’re in the wrong. You’re not.

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coresme2000@reddit

Never lead with “sorry” (even though we’re British) unless you have something to actually apologise for. I did this for a while when I moved to the US and people kept asking quizzically “why are you sorry?!”

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coresme2000@reddit

There is likely some mental health issue going on beneath the surface there or a compulsion, in all honesty that means she isn’t well. I would simply ignore it for now (as blood boiling as it would be) or smile and nod unless it escalates, perhaps be extra friendly with the rest of the neighbors and lay on the charm. Should anything significant occur other than words exchanged like property damage then the escalation path would be through to the police. You might also want to log interactions and notes to demonstrate a pattern of behavior, should you need to.

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LaidBackLeopard@reddit

Yeah, you need to externalise that feeling. Bottling it up won't help.

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quangol@reddit

User name doesn't check out 🤣

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DubbehD@reddit

I had great joy telling some granny to fuck off when she was shouting at me for having broken down in the wrong spot lol

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Super-Log3709@reddit

I know exactly this was lost while out delivering food she was shouting at me blocked me in also tried opening my door telling me I shouldn’t be driving if I didn’t know where I was etc so ended up losing my shit with her husband and they left me alone and buggered off

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Taken_Abroad_Book@reddit

Elderly people can be cunts, as you're finding out. They need to be told to fuck off too when they need it

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seven-cents@reddit

Being elderly doesn't make a twat any less of a twat. If she comes to your door again to complain then tell her that it's a public road and you can park anywhere you like if it's not blocking a driveway.

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_Dreamer_Deceiver_@reddit

Do the same thing but not close the door

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jez_24@reddit

Elderly people are just people, she was your age once and doesn’t feel that much different; just a lot more entitled and self assured than she did at 22

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snakeoildriller@reddit

Don't feel bad about her being elderly: the elderly can be arseholes as well. Source: I'm elderly but not an arsehole.

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SkyPilotOne@reddit

Listen to this guy. I'm elderly and I am an arsehole.

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snakeoildriller@reddit

**not** 😏

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SkyPilotOne@reddit

Am so! 😏

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Ambiverthero@reddit

You need to accept that she hasn’t much going on in her life so she’s taken on the role of parking police for the road. Best ignored politely.

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Efficient_Hyena_7476@reddit

Tell her to apply to the council for a disabled parking space. If she isn't disabled, point out that anyone can park in any unrestricted space on a public highway. Then blank her from now on.

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Slightly_Effective@reddit

Clearly she's being offended on behalf of your neighbours, who aren't the least bit put out. Next time ask her who it is that will be upset and tell her you'll have a chat with them. Have a chat with them, matter resolved. There's only so many neighbours. Next time she chips up on behalf of the same neighbour, you can proclaim it's perfectly alright as you've already discussed it with them. She may be testing the water, assessing how much of a pushover you are or maybe just bored/lonely. Either way, play the game better than she does.

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anotherMrLizard@reddit

She's relying on her age to shield her from any blowback from her rude and antisocial behaviour. Don't let her get away with it and you'll be doing everyone a favour.

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Playful_Beyond_2218@reddit

Just get a doorbell camera and don’t answer when it’s her. And if needed some mirrored window film for the front windows ( remember it doesn’t work when it’s dark so you would also need to draw the curtains at those times )

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Joe_Kinincha@reddit

Also, make sure your doorbell/ other camera can see your car. Y’know, just in case it gets keyed / tyres slashed etc.

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Sea_M_Pea@reddit

Just ignore her, eventually she’ll go away

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MixPlus@reddit

Sometimes elderly people use their age as an excuse to be as 'rude as fuck'.

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Organic-Apricot-6330@reddit

An old bastard is an experienced bastard

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Money-Pen8242@reddit

Do it before you close the door!

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eca3617@reddit

It's nice that you're nice. But young, old, in between... Whatever. If they're arseholes, they're arseholes. Call them out on it, don't be bullied. Being old doesn't give immunity from reciprocal response.

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presterjohn7171@reddit

This is so true. I'm 59 and unless I frighten myself by looking in the mirror the person inside me still thinks he's 30 at best. If I was a pain in the arse then well nothing fundamentally about me has changed since.

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Experiment328095@reddit

😂 You have my exact confrontation coping strategy - I’m getting arthritis in my middle fingers due to overuse, but no one ever sees the bird

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FarmerJohnOSRS@reddit

She needs to know or she will just caddy on

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Consistent-Tree6802@reddit

Don't feel bad just because she's old, she's still being an unjustified PITA and she's counting on you not defending yourself.

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Mountain-Advisor-149@reddit

Young and middle age nasty and rude people likely grow up to be the same, just now elderly. Don’t be too soft.

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smudgethomas@reddit

She's probably lonely and being an irritant to you is her way of forcing interaction. If you manage to get her onto another subject it might give her a new avenue and she'll switch topic. It's irritating to you but that's likely just how pathetically empty her life is that irritating you might be the highlight of her day!

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whyy_i_eyes_ya@reddit

Being old isn’t an excuse for being a prick. It just means they’re an old prick. Respect is earned. Fuck the old bollocks.

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Meas_uredreply@reddit

telling her off might feel good for 5 seconds but it can backfire hard, especially living alone next to her. better keep it calm and just document everything, way safer long term

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coresme2000@reddit

Exactly, it’s a very Reddit answer that will make you feel good temporarily while potentially scaring an elderly person with burgeoning mental health issues into never leaving the house again. I would be seized by a desire to find out what makes this person tick. Throw cocktail parties and invite the neighbours round including her. Get to know people. It’s always easy to understand the neighborhood dynamic and why she is like this.

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lntghll@reddit

Well we are in Britain!

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Apprehensive_Plum755@reddit

Nothing more British than politely telling somebody that you're grateful for their concern but would they mind kindly fucking off

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Dramatic_Honey8209@reddit

Could work to strengthen her resolve though, old people dgaf

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martin__t@reddit

I'm probably an old person. And I certainly dgaf. But there is absolutely no way I'd winge about someone parking legally. Well, not for a couple more years anyway...

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StuartHunt@reddit

Exactly this. If you don't deal with her , she's going to keep on bullying you. I'd also suggest getting a video doorbell, so if you end up reporting her for harassment, you'll have plenty of evidence to back up your claim.

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c0rdal@reddit

I had an elderly neighbour that would randomly give me shit, just rude for no reason. I was super nice to them for ages but made no difference. Finally cracked and told them to fuck off and they’ve been ignoring me ever since. It’s bliss

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Tricky-Alps2810@reddit

THIS She will probably be "shocked" at OP's disrespect for the elderly. If she says so, feel free to repeat it.

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stevedore82@reddit

This would have been my first response to the neighbour 😂

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dereks63@reddit

Exactly

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SignatureGold6447@reddit

‘I’ve actually spoken to x,y,z neighbours and they’ve said they’re happy for me to park there. They said they will contact me themselves IF I need to move, not go through other people. It’s also a public road so from a legal standpoint I can park wherever there is space. Please stop harassing me otherwise I may have to consider escalating this’

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Vast_Ad9484@reddit

> Please stop harassing me otherwise I may have to consider escalating this’ nobody in the uk would ever say this. That's an americanism.

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coresme2000@reddit

It’s far too prissy and conditional to be used in the US, it sounds like a letter to a broadband company. Americans are waaaay more direct about stuff like this than the British are. There would be less “I may have to consider” and more “I will”

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Vast_Ad9484@reddit

in the uk 'escalating' is only used when yo uare on the phone trying to get something resolved. No -one says that except if they are goiing up an esculator, and even then it's escalator, not escalating. Secondly, in the UK someone is much more likely to say - i'll report you to the police/landlord/council/authority whatever. May consider escalating is so vague you would be laughed at , literally.

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coresme2000@reddit

Yer, you won’t be escalating it to her manager 😂

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SignatureGold6447@reddit

I’m from the UK and use ‘I may have to consider escalating this’ on a regular-ish basis as part of my work …

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Vast_Ad9484@reddit

Ok son, go ahead. Consider escalating it, we'll be right here.

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TrustEast4832@reddit

Too many words. "I can legally park wherever on this road and will continue to do so. If you continue to knock on my door or post letters after this conversation I will consider it harassment and report to police." You quite literally waste breath explaining or justifying yourself to these types - she's not interested in reality or truth, she's interested in bullying to get what she wants. You dont invite conversation or back and forth, you're blunt and you walk away.

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EpponeeRae@reddit

I think this is probably the right approach, but you could put one more bridging step between that and being nice if you wanted. Along the lines of "thank you for looking out for me, I took your advice and spoke with the neighbours and we have reached an agreement about me being able to park in those places. Don't worry, I will never block your driveway. Thank you again for your concern, the issue is resolved now."

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Illustrious-Cup-3913@reddit

I hear you I also have issues with a neighbour who doesn’t always use their drive and causes inconvenience with parking sometimes

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Mental_Body_5496@reddit

If the other neighbours are ok then just say to her would she like you to ask the local PSCO to come around and explain public street parking rules to her? Why cant you park on a speed hump - people do round our way?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I was pretty sure it was illegal to but also I can’t anyway because there’s bollards either side of the speed bump so unless I fully park my car on the pavement, I can’t park outside my own house, which I don’t thinks really fair to put one directly outside my house 😭

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Mental_Body_5496@reddit

Yup I guess it has to go somewhere ti stop people being twats. I think that's also your point to this person - where fo they want you to actually park?

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coresme2000@reddit

Sadly, the response is likely to be “She shouldn’t have bought a house next to a speed bump with bollards”

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Mental_Body_5496@reddit

Truth ! Some people are just vile!

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Mat74UK@reddit

Ignore her and park where you like. If she continues, send a recorded and signed for cease and desist letter to warn her formally. * **Identify Parties:** Clear names and addresses of both yourself and the neighbour. * **Detail the Behaviour:** Specifically list the actions, dates, and times of harassment. * **State Impact:** Describe how the actions cause distress or alarm. * **Legal Standing:** Mention that the behaviour violates the Protection from Harassment Act 1997. * **Demand Action:** Demand that the harassment stop immediately. * **Warn of Legal Action:** State that you will consider applying for an injunction through the County Court if the behaviour continues.

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TooHot1639@reddit

No, don't do this. You'll devalue your property.

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thejadedfalcon@reddit

Not everyone lives for their house price to increase, some of us just want a bloody home.

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coresme2000@reddit

Given the harassment, doesn’t sound like op might be living there that long. Written disputes between close neighbours must be divulged by law during a sale.

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maersyl@reddit

She sounds like she may be old and lonely and is acting out because of it. Does she live alone? Recently lost a partner? The same happened to my elderly neighbour when her husband died. She slid into letters through doors about parking to others along the street, about front gardens not being neat, etc. Loneliness and grief is a horrible mix.

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coresme2000@reddit

Also Covid completely ruined a lot of older people’s lives even if they never got Covid bad, and made them hermit-like at a point where it’s much harder to break out of routine. My in-laws still wear masks in the house, never go outside and leave the Ocado shopping on a ‘decontamination table/fridge’, before wrapping each item in individual freezer bags and putting it away. They have literally thousands of towel and loo rolls in the house. Everywhere they walk, the floor has to have fresh towel roll sheets lining it. Sadly in the uk, other than having them committed there is no way to resolve it if they won’t seek help themselves. This is not as uncommon as you may think and the pandemic send many OCD people into a total spiral they have yet to recover from.

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Prudent-Pressure2146@reddit

Yeah my mum became obsessed with street goings on and was a typical nosy neighbour cos she had absolutely nothing else to do.

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letthemhavejush@reddit

Same as mine when my dad passed away, anybody turning up in the road she would do that meerkat move of straining her neck from the sofa to see what was going on. Or, the one that would annoy me the most, the quick dash off the sofa to stand at the window and watch neighbours relatives turn up at their houses.

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Interesting-Amoeba25@reddit

Yeah I have a neighbour like this, first day I moved in she had complained about the parking of my car, then a few days later she asked me to use a different door because using my front door bothered her….long story short, we’re friends now and I go over to hers occasionally for tea and a chat, we’ll catch the bus to the city together, etc. She no longer has any complaints and I get all the good juicy neighborhood gossip haha.

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Dramatic_Honey8209@reddit

This is a valid point

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islanderpm@reddit

Yes, that rage has to go somewhere.

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lntghll@reddit

Does the elderly person drive? Have they ever driven? Years ago, people used to have that unwritten rule that you keep people’s houses clear so they can park outside their own house. And still to a degree this is the case today. They may just remember this info and have too much time on their hands and think they’re helping others. When in fact you can park anywhere on that road and people don’t mind anymore. Just keep telling them that you can park anywhere, you’ve discussed it with neighbours and they don’t care, and that legally you can park anywhere on this road and others do too. I would tell them I understand they’re trying to help others but this isn’t the norm anymore. Then politely tell them to stop harassing you about it.

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Weary_Sun534@reddit

It sounds bad but the best way to deal with these people is direct, tell her to fuck off and ull park where you please.

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playful_adventure@reddit

I think it's as you've said - she's harassing you. Keep records, date and time stamp everything and if needs be you can choose to fight fire with fire...

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No-Garage-7424@reddit

I (M55) had this problem with a neighbour in his 70's who didn't even own a car. On the third occasion of him approaching me about it he became aggressive and shouty, I calmly walked away to diffuse the situation because he simply wouldn't listen and called the non emergency police line 101. I explained the situation to the call handler and asked for our local pcso to visit and explain the law to him. This avoided any confrontation between us and he has never raised the subject again.

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Any_Tomorrow_Today@reddit

Ignore it all - there is nothing they can do about it. It is a public road and a free for all, especially with terraces!

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gingerinc@reddit

You can park on a speed bump.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I can’t because it looks like this https://preview.redd.it/3a7i35cy16vg1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3488a96b7264a34ba1cb7a5a0e629c4c24219176

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gingerinc@reddit

Ahh okay- more than a speed bump.

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Specialist_-Berry@reddit

How old are we talking? Is this likely to be an issue for decades, years or months?

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

lol yeah, hopefully shes way past her expiry date.

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UCanBdoWatWeWant2Do@reddit

Imagine wishing someone's death over a parking issue

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

Imagine thinking I actually want her dead over a parking issue?

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UCanBdoWatWeWant2Do@reddit

That's what you wrote mate. And id they're a horrible person complaining about parking, what's the fitting adjective for you?

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

not my fault you are getting all high and might about it mate. What you gonna do? Berate me until I magically change my mind? Pull the other one...

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Specialist_-Berry@reddit

This went south pretty quickly

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UCanBdoWatWeWant2Do@reddit

She's complaining about parking, chill out.

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Easy_Effort7985@reddit

Just ignore/tell them to shove it. Equally. I don’t understand why you feel the need to mention being a single female, when the person you have an issue with is also a single female.

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Connect_Remote2890h@reddit

just tell her that you have spoken to the other neighbours and that they have no issue with you. also tell her highways owns all rights to all roads on housing estates after 3 years of firstbuilds, so unless they address households themselves about parking etc which may interfere with emergency vehicle access, you can say you appreciate her concern but she has NO NEED to 'disturb' you any more with parking.

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Outrageous_Shirt_737@reddit

Tell her to f*** off.

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Technical_Magazine88@reddit

Bloody coffin dodgers!

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hatterSCFC@reddit

Post the letter back through her letter box, any further ones post back unopened. She mentions parking again, ignore her or just ask her "is it illegal to park there?", "so, why are you bothering me about it?" These passive aggressive old people are a pain in the arse!! Probably hasn't even got a car has she?!! You can't be nasty to her though, just be twice as sweet back, talk to her like she's stupid, " I pay road tax every year deary , I'm actually paying to be able to park there, do you pay road tax lovey?""

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PetiteGardener144@reddit

Fellow Brit here with a bastard neighbour too: As soon as she comes to the door: Hold up your hand. "I'm aware of your concerns and they have been taken under advisement. I'm busy. You may leave." Close the door. Pisses my neighbour off sooooo much, but i was very polite, so they can't argue. He didn't come back. Every note he pushes through my door is taken straight out to he recycle bin. Even tries putting it on my car - into the bin it goes unread. I'm pretty sure he's watching, so adore doing this.

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WashingTurds@reddit

Just be nice to her, lady is old and likes to peek through curtains. Say to her you’ll contact the relevant local authority to see if you’re breaking any laws. Watch how quick it stops..

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Felt2450@reddit

probably why the last person left the house got to nip it in the bud straight away or it'll carry on in a polite book purposeful way

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StuffEducational1632@reddit

Could you not possibly drop a cease-and-desist letter? Stating that if this continuous, you will need to contact the police each and every time and will further seek council to sue for harassment and breach of peace?

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Nettinonuts@reddit

She’s an old lady, thank her for her concern and explain that you are paying your neighbour for use of that bit of road, press a 20p coin in her hand and smile sweetly.

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No_Height_2408@reddit

She is bullying you because you are young. If you give her a bit of attitude and show her you won't be pushed around she will back down.

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TapeDeckSlick@reddit

Just ignore her, if the other neighbours don't care and you're not blocking her drive, there's no issue.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Small caveat on that is that when someone asks you to leave the space empty because they are having a delivery then you should leave it empty.

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CodeBeginning6548@reddit

Under normal circumstances, absolutely. For this thundercunt, not a chance!

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AlwaysNorth8@reddit

What a fucking word

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MaskedBunny@reddit

It comes after the lighteningpenis

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rhc10014@reddit

I’ve been struck by that.

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vectorology@reddit

But not if they have plenty of other space available, as described by OP.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Have you ever carried a cooker? If you had you would get my point.

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vectorology@reddit

Yes. I used a trolley like a sane person. And I’m a small woman. Like OP said, his neighbour had a driveway, so if there is a large delivery it should park there, not the road which would be farther anyways. Why are you so hostile? And cooker-fixated?

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

I once lived in a house with a 3 meter long driveway, good luck parking your lorry there.

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OpenedCan@reddit

Of course your own personal experiences are the same for everyone.

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OpenedCan@reddit

Behave. All of them are on sack barrows. And as an ex removal man, if you can carry a cooker from the kerb to the door, you've got bigger issues.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Post a photo here of you lifting a six-ring gas cooker.

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OpenedCan@reddit

Yeah, I always have colleagues taking photos of us in the job instead of lifting the fucking thing. And of course we've moved those cookers. Might take a few men but how the fuck do you think people move house?

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

By having the removal lorry park in front of their house. Boom.

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OpenedCan@reddit

Yeah that's not always feasible. You try parking outside a house directly in London etc. You adapt and get the job done. And if we've managed to get a large cooker out the house, we then use piano wheels and push it up the ramp, so once it's out, I couldn't give a fuck where the lorry is. Are you the sad old neighbour by any chance? What a strange hill to die on.

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vectorology@reddit

You mean like in a driveway? That the neighbour has?

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Careless-Cooker@reddit

Precisely!!! 🤣

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Andries89@reddit

The person has a driveway have you not read the post?

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Flashy-Cucumber-3794@reddit

https://preview.redd.it/7bdscmhoixug1.png?width=1408&format=png&auto=webp&s=6394f7991c1df21f4727c12e06ecb701b042bedc Found this totally legitimate picture of the guy above delivering to the old lady in question.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Set up photo and everyone in the industry knows Kenwood are built from tin-foil.

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bitterlemon80@reddit

Did you miss that she has a driveway?

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AlwaysNorth8@reddit

OP also describes her as old, can you not infer why she may want a specific space for a delivery?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I mean we don’t have a driveway or a space outside our house and delivery people still manage to deliver things to our house. I mean I’ll move my car because I don’t want things to go further but I do think it’s ridiculous

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AlwaysNorth8@reddit

You are being bullied off a granny - sort it out man

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Hahaha did make me laugh but you don’t know my situation. I’m autistic so I don’t particularly like talking to people or any kind of confrontation. I live alone most of the time and she always seems to do it when my partners away. Because he actually tells her to stop but I just kinda ignore her

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ddmf@reddit

I'm autistic and for these types of people and situation I will ruminate and ruminate and if I don't do something it will ruin my life. What I've found works is to write down a number of things I want to say and come up with a concise retort. I will then practice that retort so that I have it down for when I need it. Sometimes I will smile the sweetest smile and just ignore them, my daughter says that is when I look my most dangerous.

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Glum_And_Merry@reddit

sounds like you need to just bite the bullet and tell her to stop too. the more you put up with it the more she'll keep doing it.

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akabillposters@reddit

👆👆👆

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Hahaa how would you go about it ? If I’ve told her already it’s a public road and I can park where I want. I’m a 22 year old female, my first house and I live alone most of the time and if I tell her to fuck off, how do I know she doesn’t have family that would smash my windows in ? I live in a dodgy area 😵‍💫 I wanted to know if there were any ways to go about it down the harassment route and people have answered that

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SockSock@reddit

Just politely say you will try to avoid parking there if at all possible but will continue to park in any legal available space and won't be moving your car around once parked. If it helps your confidence when dealing with her actually write to the council and ask them to confirm if parking restrictions relate to your street so you can say that you have confirmed with the relevant authorities that no such restrictions apply, your other neighbour has already confirmed that its no problem for them. Then try to just ignore her and focus on enjoying your new life and build relationships with the other friendly neighbours. In my experience some older people dont deal well with retirement and need to find something to do or be bothered about, dont let their problems impact you. You know youre in the right so let it pass you by. She'll soon get bored when you stop giving her a reaction or give her the same reply every time and move on to something else. Maybe buy some jigsaws from the charity shop and give them to her after removing one piece from every box.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Most sensible answer on this thread.

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thegroucho@reddit

Unless she's getting a washing machine from the back of a van herself, I'm not sure why that's an issue. If I have a fridge delivery and they leave it 20 metres from my house I'll just refuse to accept it.

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Heathy94@reddit

In normal circumstances if a Neighbour asked me to move my car politely I'd be more than happy to do so but the way she seems to have harassed OP and the arrogant way she has gone about it would make me want to leave my car where it is just to spite her.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Taking the OP at face value (meaning there is nothing missing and it is in context) I would do the same. Take my upvote.

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Tumping@reddit

Sounds like the delivery persons problem ? If they have to carry what ever down the street then it’s neither OPs problem or even the woman complaining !

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Downvotes?! Adults are in work, kids are in lessons. This must be the unemployed and stay at home mothers.

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ilikeyourgetup@reddit

Which category do you fit in to have made at least four separate comments crying about downvotes?

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Good point, Reddit was slow to upload so I repeated. Should be fixed now. I'm on a day off.

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qbnaith@reddit

So…you realise other working people have day offs on weekdays too?

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oportoman@reddit

Not if they have sufficient room

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Worldly_Let6134@reddit

If someone is having a delivery that requires a very large vehicle, then they need to contact the council to arrange a parking suspension order. They shouldn't be entitled enough to expect the world to just bend to their will.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Downvotes! There are a lot of nasty people around.

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Riovem@reddit

Girl, what?

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THE-HOARE@reddit

Wait would be polite to I agree with you but if someone is being this much hassle why would you be polite? I know I wouldn’t be jumping out of bed to help out by moving my car if the lady had been pestering me.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Down votes! There's alot of nasty people out there.

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Cheap_Television_988@reddit

Found the old lady

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jamesish99@reddit

Depends on the delivery - sofa being delivered, sure! Sainsburys being delivered - Nada.

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jake_burger@reddit

Depends on what it is and how frequent. I have multiple Amazon deliveries a day, so my neighbours have to keep the public tosh that I don’t own free for me? No

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Odd_Scar836@reddit

Maybe if she wasn’t being a dick all the time OP would leave it empty for the delivery

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thegroucho@reddit

Small caveat, if they asked politely, then you should leave it empty. Otherwise, no, fuck that noise.

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AlwaysNorth8@reddit

Key word being 'should' and not 'must'. Another caveat is if she wasn't such an arsehole to her neighbours, maybe a one off clearance of a parking space may be accommodated. But when it's part of a wider persistent whinge, why is she surprised people are reluctant?

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Meas_uredreply@reddit

ignoring works until it doesn’t, she’s already escalating with letters and bothering neighbours, that’s past “just ignore” stage tbh, needs some kind of record or boundary now

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keeppoise@reddit

Yeah this. Public road and not blocking anything means you’re fine. I’d just keep a record of everything in case it escalates and avoid engaging

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Downvotes! There is a lot of nasty people around.

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dhardyuk@reddit

Make a microphone out of a toilet roll tube and a smooth ball. Next time she confronts you just pull it out and tell her you need to record everything she’s saying for “when we go to court”.

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yearsofpractice@reddit

Hey OP. Middle aged terrace-with-limited-non-permit-parking—dwelling married father of two here. I have elderly relatives and neighbours, so I know how their minds work. Her worldview - bless her - is almost certainly very rigid and revolves around “threats and safety”. For reasons unimaginable to younger and more flexible people, other people’s cars are “threatening”. I have resolved situations like this in the past by inviting elderly - it’s ***always elderly*** - neighbours into my house for a cup of tea and a chat. Elderly (and , frankly, stupid young people) develop an agenda that they just need to get off their chest. Once they’ve done that, they are often more agreeable because they feel safe and listened to. You, suddenly, inexplicably, in their mind become “one of the good ones”. The best thing is that you - usually - don’t have to explain your side of the story, just a few “ooohs” and “ahhhhs” and silences in the right place are enough while someone is getting their agenda off their chest. Your neighbour doesn’t care about the cars. She cares about the imagined internal tensions that “they” (that’s you BTW) are doing things that she can’t control. Once you become “we” in her mind, you’re cool and she’ll move onto the everyday concerns of the elderly which - at its core - is bins and dogshit on the pavement. Biiiiiinnnnnnnsssssss. This is all part of the challenge of living in densely packed societies. It’s interesting and sometimes frustrating. If that doesn’t work, you can probably beat her in a street fight. Nothing gets a message of “let’s just live in peace” across like a broken jaw.

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Logicdon@reddit

As the great philosopher RZA once said - "turn the other cheek and I'll break your fucking chin".

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anomalous_cowherd@reddit

I'm not *sure* that last bit would actually help? I suppose it's worth a try if all else fails...

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yearsofpractice@reddit

As Gandhi famously said: > “Become one with your adversary - show them love. If that fails the old bag will have osteoporosis - all the better for a right cross, the brittle jawed ***fool***”

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vectorology@reddit

With a username like yours, I’m inclined to follow your advice!

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IpromithiusI@reddit

Next time she knocks you need to be firm, clear and authoritative that you will park where you are able to legally, and that you do not want her back complaining or leaving you notes. Make it clear that it's bordering harassment and whilst she may mean well, it's unwanted. If it continues, involve the police. As tedious as it sounds for them, they'll attend and give her a talking to.

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Ok_Advantage_8153@reddit

Thank God for a sensible answer. "Set some boundaries firmly" is the only possible advice here. can't believe a load of the advice is "get a ring camera and hide in the laundry basket to avoid confrontation if you see her prowling".

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GnaphaliumUliginosum@reddit

Get reconstructive surgery and wear a disguise at all times so she doesn't recognise you. Consider moving to a foreign country. Anything to avoid actually talking to another human being in the flesh.

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dhardyuk@reddit

Get a Billy Murphy mask with her face on it. Tell her to shut up because you’re the real person; that she’s just a reflection and should remain silent. Threaten to expose her to the neighbours as a coloured in shadow with a bad attitude.

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VOODOO285@reddit

I’ve heard wearing a William Shatner mask inside out and carrying a machete is a good way to look inconspicuous.

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Cultural_Horse_7328@reddit

https://preview.redd.it/v4nvy0t9pyug1.jpeg?width=1511&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=cb69cf42ef3e15f7d08de60c25c2c884aee4754a

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blomba2@reddit

To be fair, most redditors are weak and socially awkward that like to avoid confrontation

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Freedom-For-Ever@reddit

Great reply! >If it continues, involve the police. I would change that slightly to: Make it clear that if it continues you will involve the police - and then carry it through if it does.

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barrybreslau@reddit

It's definitely bullying/ harassment.

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daedelius@reddit

And point out that the neighbours have told you there’s no problem

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Frequent_Flyer_Miles@reddit

This exactly!!

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72dk72@reddit

Write a letter back stating clearly what the law is on parking and ask her not to continue harassing you, or you will have to consider legal action against her.

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Remarkable-Drop8818@reddit

She's a old miserable bully, ignore don't give into her

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adzpower@reddit

Bit late but you just need to suck it up and be confontational about it, ask her why she is lying and tell her to shit off. Bullies only understand aggression, so bite back and she'll likely leave you alone.

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tlhdsc@reddit

I'd park across her drive and tell her to leave you the fuck alone.

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Whitz44@reddit

Just accept that she’s a busy body who likes to interfere in other people’s business and probably piss n moan all the time about one thing or another. The issue is hers and not yours. She’s actually complaining on behalf of other neighbours that aren’t even bothered, don’t let it bother you and take it with a pinch of salt. Just tell her it’s the only place you can park and the neighbours don’t mind, then end the conversation and walk away or shut the door. If she persists then you’ll just have to stop being so polite, tell her to stop bothering you, the neighbours don’t mind and you pay road tax and can park where you like.

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CitroenUK@reddit

Next time she calls tell her you've passed the message on to the chauffeur and that's the limit of what you can do.

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Codders94@reddit

Act crazy, no one fucks with crazy.

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totesboredom@reddit

Get a camera up to monitor your car and front door as you can then prove vandalism and also harassment.

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heyitsed2@reddit

Every time you answer the door and it's her just start wailing. Tell her it's not your car/you don't drive/you sold your car to another neighbour who looks just like you. You have to park your car there because Russian spies are tracking your movements and you need to throw them off the trail. Get one of those wheel clamps so you can say "sorry I didn't tax my car now I can't move it", then make sure she's looking when you take it off and drive away, give her a little wave.

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Welsh__dresser@reddit

My dad was obsessed with the neighbours parking when he became less mobile and housebound, he even kept his old car taxed and MOT’d to ‘reserve’ the spot outside his house even though he could no longer drive, he just didn’t want someone else to park outside his house. It’s sad when their lives become so small there is nothing else to focus on. I would turn the tables and ask ‘are you ok my love? Is there anyone I can call for you? Act like she’s a batty old bird and she may well steer clear in case you call social services to do a welfare check 🤣

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Hopeful_Yam1673@reddit

Put a sign on your letterbox that says “unsolicited letters, $5 each”. And every time they put one in. Send them an invoice for $5 lol.

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Minute-Nothing6798@reddit

I had a neighbour just like this. I told her I would not engage with her nonsense and never did. Finally, she was so infuriated that I wouldn't play her silly game that she sent me a solicitors letter, having made up all kinds of infringements of her 'rights'. I responded to that of course, explaining the situation. Never heard from them again. A couple of months later she called the police to complain about where I leave my dustbin. Surprisingly, they came to me to ask for my side of the story. I have not heard a tweet from her since and neither has anyone else in this area. I'm only guessing she was reprimanded for wasting police time but whatever was their response, it worked. Only way to deal with unreasonable people is 'No Contact'.

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Dnny10bns@reddit

I'd ignore her knocking. My neighbours know not to bother because I won't answer the door unless I'm expecting. 😂

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More-Yard5742@reddit

Stab her

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No_Pollution_950@reddit

Put a gnome in her garden each time she contacts you about it.

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Meas_uredreply@reddit

yeah this isn’t about parking anymore, she’s just targeting you. you’re allowed to park on a public road as long as you’re not blocking anything, that’s it. stop engaging with her face to face, keep everything if she sends letters, like literally keep a little folder. if she keeps knocking or escalating, report it as harassment, especially since you’re alone there. also maybe grab a cheap door cam, people calm down real quick when they know it’s recorded

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Prefect_99@reddit

Pretend you can't see or hear her. Doorbell rings, open it. "That's odd, there's no one here. I wonder where that nice old lady next door went..."

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Iasc123@reddit

Block her drive when she's out.

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Western-Caregiver897@reddit

One day we’ll all grow old, have fuck all to do and become obsessed with parking.

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ScreamingAardvark5@reddit

Show them your vehicle tax, MOT and insurance which allows you to park anywhere you want. I had to do this with my neighbour who thought she owned the pavement and road outside her house EVEN THOUGH SHE DIDN'T HAVE A CAR.

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Kristen242@reddit

I would go down the route of " I'm afraid I have no idea what the issue is, can you not access your driveway? You can? Good. No, my car is on the public carriageway, parked legally. No, I won't be moving it, it's fine. Have a nice day."

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letthemhavejush@reddit

Just being awkward for awkwards sake. Probably lived there since the dawn of man and think she owns the street. She’s probably seen you’re young and live alone and thinks she can use bullying tactics to get what she wants. It’s a public street you can park where you want and she can stamp her feet all she likes about it.

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Dry_Curve9126@reddit

She has probably got dementia or the start of it. Just tell her you’ll move it after you’ve fed your children - and shut the door!

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MidsummerMidnight@reddit

Threaten her with legal action, it's harassment

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DeadbeatChivalry@reddit

I’ve had exactly the same, a neighbour with a drive that fits two cars yet they park both cars on the road leaving their drive empty all the time. Where they park on the road fits 3 cars but they park in a way to stop anyone else parking there. My partner once managed to park there and when she went out later they were waiting and started yelling at her about how wrong she was to park there. (Keep in mind we have no driveway and usually my partner parks in front of our house and I park where I can find further down the road. Some people just feel entitled to something that isn’t there’s just because it is in front of their house. Honest advice is ignore it and park where you want. If she comes round just be polite and never bite or argue, just state facts and eventually she will get the hint… hopefully…

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reverandglass@reddit

> She’s posted another letter through this morning Send one back saying you've added her latest letter to the pile of evidence of a campaign of harassment that the police have asked you to compile. Problem solved.

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No-Ask2117@reddit

Post her letter back with a nice note telling her to do one, as politely or not as you want.

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Ok_Bag2395@reddit

Ignore her, she'll get sick of it if she gets no reaction.

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ServerLost@reddit

If you can manage it invite her in for a cup of tea, find out what's actually going on.

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realmccoyredbus@reddit

she is just an old busy body , trying to bully you because you’re young , tell her you spoke to your neighbours and none of them mind how you park as you don’t have a choice to park outside your home but absolutely 100% entitled to park close by

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WelshEngineer@reddit

It's harassment, report it to the police as antisocial behaviour. I have had to deal with a very similarly situation in the past, eventually the old lady causing problems got an ASBO (don't know if they still call them that).

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Sc00byUK@reddit

Knock on her door and talk to her. Ask her where she thinks you should park? Also unless your car grounds out on the speed bump, why can't you park on it?

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HazelnutLatte_88@reddit

Have her done for harassment. If it was a middle aged or young man or woman you wouldn’t put up with this, would you? The police knocking at hers will probably shut her up.

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PortsmouthGal@reddit

My 85 year old sister was born with a personality disorder which has become worse as she's aged. She has a complete lack of empathy and her sense of entitlement knows no bounds. You've had lots of good advice. Get a Ring doorbell and don't engage with this nasty old woman. Remember that nothing lasts for ever. I wish you luck.

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MJLDat@reddit

How elderly? Can you wait?

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shredditorburnit@reddit

Never play that game, I'm always reminded of the french lawyer who bought a very old lady's house on the "you can stay there until you pass" basis. She outlived him.

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jtr99@reddit

Jeanne Calment I think it was.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Pahahahahahhahaha, knowing my luck she will be immortal 😭

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djjudas21@reddit

Fingers crossed for a good flu season this year 🤞

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KiltedBaklava@reddit

I swear they always are! It’s as if being evil gives them longevity. I’ve dealt with this a lot with my work. Sweet older lady, butter won’t melt? Dead in a year. Evil hawk who watches my every move & is always complaining (even though she’s not my customer)? Outlives her entire street!

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anotherMrLizard@reddit

I think a lot of bad people live longer just from sheer spite.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Maybe I need to turn evil in my old age, maybe that’s the key to a long life 🤣

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FreddiesNightmare65@reddit

They do say, if they are a miserable or nasty person, they live longer. I can vouch for that, my grandmother was both, but mainly a cruel nasty person and she was 86 when she died. My other grandmother was such a happy nice person, and so was my mum, they both died young. You need to put her in her place or you mitt have to put up with it fir the next 20/30 years. Tell her to call the cops on you if she has a problem with your parking and shut the door on her or walk away if you are in the street.

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Spank86@reddit

I always want to say "im surprised you dont want to spend the limited time you have left more productively"

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Mr_Venom@reddit

Self-solving problem.

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sparklybeast@reddit

lmao

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Lotty3@reddit

Tell her straight that the neighbours are fine with the parking they have told you so. Your car is staying were it is parked it is taxed and there are no restricted parking. And if she knocks again you are going to get legal advice. (Im not saying do it just tell her you will) she's a typical miss marple, alone all day with nothing better to do.

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Whenever I have read about The Great Replacement Theory I have always thought if it is a thing it's terrible and must be stopped. Now reading this thread and most comments having a 'F you I'm alright so everyone else can F off' I am moving towards being in favour of that theory.

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Todayisntyourday@reddit

I saw something this morning which might be relevant to this. If you say I can’t do X it gives the other person an opportunity to respond with suggestions. Try I won’t instead. Or just don’t engage with them. The Ring doorbell suggestion is a good one, might be amusing watching them. Don’t let it ruin the experience in your new home.

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NeverTooLate227@reddit

As long as your car is taxed, insured and MoT'd then you can park anywhere on the public highway that doesn't have parking restrictions, and if anyone tries to harrass you about it then explain this to them and invite them to obtain their own legal advice on the matter.

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Constant-Werewolf-39@reddit

Keep a diary of what she is doing then eventually go to the police for harassment she will get a talking to and hopefully stop

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Oceansoul119@reddit

Well that's a problem that could be fixed with a can of petrol and some matches. Unfortuneately the price might make such a solution unavailable at this moment.

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Remote_Atmosphere993@reddit

My son was getting grief from one of our neighbours for legally parking opposite his house. I told my son that next time he shouts at you just smile and wave at him.

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ResponsibleBend2195@reddit

Elderly Karen lots of it about.

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Small_Heart6267@reddit

Sounds like your neighbour is bored or lonely, highlight of her day is coming to moan at you - invite her in for a cup of tea next time she comes! Get her on your side :)

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Acrobatic-Ad584@reddit

Ignore her, she is wrong to upset you in your home. Tell her to leave you alone and get on with your life the best you can.

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cusiter67@reddit

Ignore them. Or tell them to GTF. Both will work.

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PinQuiet447@reddit

At the end of the day if your car has a MOT & tax, you can park in anywhere on the public highway providing your not blocking a driveway/ dropped kerb, not causing and obstruction at a junction and not a contravention of any parking restrictions.

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lmaxwell_@reddit

why can’t you park on the speed bump?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Bollards either side of it

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lmaxwell_@reddit

fair

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Extension_Sun_377@reddit

Had to explain to an American once what street furniture meant. They were thinking sofas!

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RoutineCloud5993@reddit

Get a dash cam hardwired into the car, so it can capture incidents when the engine is off. And then when you tell her to fuck off you have extra protection from her retaliating against your car.

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Middle_Swim_5961@reddit

I had this from a neighbour when I moved in to a terrace 15 years ago. I still ignore her. Don’t move!

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Tricky_Bee6237@reddit

Could be first signs of dementia. My mum had some strange ideas about these sorts of things.

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Timely-Trick8467@reddit

I have been there. And I too deeply regretted buying our house. She was our immediate next door neighbour, we shared an access path between our gardens and side of the house and at the time we had a 3 foot fence. So whenever we were in the garden she would come out and stare at us, moan about kids playing ,BBQ whatever. She even complained that we would put the bins out the front of the house on bin day. We spoke to her family who visited regularly and there advice was to "just ignore it". Easy enough when you don't live next to her. The final straw for me was one day I was taking the kids to school when she trapped me on my front door step screaming in my face about being here and putting our bins out in her space. I dropped the kids at school and took myself off to the police station were I made a formal complaint and asked them to visit her. This wasn't the first time she had been verbally abusive to me or guests but id had enough. They showed up and warned her that if her behaviour continued we could potentially press charges for harassment. It did change her behaviour, instead of shouting at us she would just stick her fingers up at us or glare. We erected a 6foot fence in the back garden and would just play music if she came outside to moan. I also thought I could "wait her out". She lived another 20 years though. But mostly it was amicable after the police visit. Do not sit quietly. Tell her straight that where you park has nothing to do with her. Tell her if she continues to post letters and harass you about parking you will take matters further. And follow through with it. It doesn't matter how old she is, or if she's lonely. You don't deserve to be treated like that. That being said, if you think making friends with her would work better and you don't mind having tea or something with her ask her in.

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dontbeignorantordumb@reddit

If it makes you feel better, knock on the house of the people she says you're bothering and kindly ask how they feel about, mention they you've been addressed by that woman regarding the issue. Chances are they don't give a flying fuck and they know she is a problem. Regarding you being 22, I don't want to sound rude, but you're not a kid anymore, life won't get easier and you need to step up for yourself, people will push while you let them, the more you are quiet the more they will push.

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snarkmaiden5@reddit

Unfortunately for a lot of older people as they get to that age and become less mobile their world shrinks to their home and the land outside it. Things that shouldn't matter becomes very important and aggravating to them. Doesn't make it any less difficult to live with day to day though. No advice really, the road is free for anyone to park anywhere.

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dobbynobson@reddit

This reminds me of what happened to my in-laws. For years they had good relations with the retired neighbours, whose house was at right angles to theirs in the corner of a cul-de-sac. There was even a royal wedding bbq on their driveway with lots of households joining in (not my cup of tea, but it was an excuse to eat lots of halloumi). Within about 8 years things had become strained due to perceived slights here and there. Finally, they asked if my in-laws would remove several small shrubs from their front garden as they were blocking the wife's view down the cul-de-sac from her kitchen. Yes, she liked to have a full 180 of everyone's business without leaving her castle. Since my in-laws had their house on the market and a buyer lined up, they refused. While they were on holiday, the neighbours simply cut all the shrubs down. Even had the fucking cheek to put the remains in the in-laws' green bin!! It was a real demonstration of how myopic and petty people can get over what they feel is their domain.

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CastleMeadowJim@reddit

Pretty much what I was thinking. Elderly people tend to be pretty isolated, this might be the most social interaction she gets.

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Meerkatsu@reddit

Don't be bullied by your neighbour. We had a series of situations with our neighbour and in the end we just ignored them. Tell them to naff off. Then ignore forever. Life is too short.

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mattress_117@reddit

I have an elderly neighbour and he does the same thing, watches to see who is turning around and who is parking where. They honestly just have nothing else better to do. Ignore her.

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JimmyNails86@reddit

Tell them no, that's what they have a driveway for, and if they bring it up again you're calling the cops for harassment. Then if they do it Austin, follow through. Sounds like weponised old lady behavior and the only way or will stop is to call out out

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Snaggl3t00t4@reddit

Id politely remind her its a public road and you pay road tax. You're parked legally and she can therefore fuck right off.

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greyhounds4life1969@reddit

Just ignore her, she'll give up eventually

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Pedantichrist@reddit

Smile, nod, wave, and do nothing. Make the actual interactions comfortable and sweet, and do but even think about them afterwards. She is obsessed with something that does not matter to you at all, so park where you like, but treat this as if she has stopped by to tell you about her grandson’s upcoming promotion at work.

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Badgi@reddit

Remain civil, express that you won't be changing your parking habits because you're not doing anything wrong and would like the subject to be dropped. If she continues or doubles down, report her for harassment. Moving because of this isn't really the answer, as she'll likely just do it to the next person. I realise the problem won't follow you, but it doesn't solve the problem either.

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Remarkable_Bet_4131@reddit

Nezt time she knocks tell.her to fuck off and not to ever knock on your door again. If she says anything or does knock again phone the police and tell them she is harrassing you, which is what she is doing. If that doesnt work id start contacting social services and tell them the old twats lost he plot and is wondering round the streets knocking on random houses causing hastle.

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Psychedeliciousness@reddit

Tell her if she wants a dedicated parking space to get a blue badge and call the council, until then, it's PvP.

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Purple-Custard-5799@reddit

Tell them it's the King's highway, and they need to take it up with His Majesty

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busbybob@reddit

How does the speed bump prevent you parking?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Without showing you the outside of my house, it looks like this https://preview.redd.it/mf1wt681xxug1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d904625e84e5c8e2a6c9ef97d1411460bb91a232

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busbybob@reddit

I see, thats a pain. Your right, i could come and park outside your neighbours house if i wanted.

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rebelallianxe@reddit

I live on a similar street and have no parking on my side so everyone parks wherever and someone put a sticker on my car window overnight saying no parking for parking outside their house. Knocked but no response. Intend to ignore them and keep parking wherever I want. As you say, there are no restrictions. Stop answering the door to her.

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Wheresmymindoffto@reddit

The question is not what can you do about it, more what can she do about it. No one owns the road outside of their house. If its not the car it will be something else. Tell her bollocks.

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MegsSixx@reddit

Ignore the miserable baggage, she's nothing better to do than curtain twitch and be a problematic neighbor. If she keeps persisting then tell her that you'll park on her driveway since she so kindly offered due to no parking availability on the road. She'll soon change her tune.

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Yikes44@reddit

I had an elderly neigbour just like yours when I bought my first place and lived alone. It really stressed me out until one day, after about a year of her constant niggles and general harassment, I finally snapped and told her to mind her own business (I'm 99% sure I didn't actually swear at her but my boyfriend thought I did). After that I didn't hear a peep out of her. It made me realise that some bullies will push and push just to see how far they can push you before you push back. I'm really sad that she made me lose my temper because I never want to be that person. But don't feel bad if it gets to that point because sometimes it has to. It sounds as if your other neighbours all know what she's like already, so believe them - you're not the bad person here.

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manicrazor@reddit

Draw a line under it: "I acknowledge your complaint but I have explained repeatedly that it is a public road with no parking restrictions, and I will continue to park, safely, wherever I so wish. If you continue to contact me about this I will consider it harassment and report you to the authorities."

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Both-Anteater3056@reddit

💩 ask her if she knows where you can purchase horse manure from, as you are planning on planting some new plants in the front garden. 🪴

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stumperr@reddit

Letter through her door 'no'

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Simple yet effective, love that 🤣

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Fit-Fault338@reddit

Don’t answer the door.

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jimmy19742018@reddit

Just tell her to jog on (i would use far more colorful language) and mind her own business, you have tried the peaceful route and its clearly not worked, now she's harassing you

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Natural_Bet6685@reddit

So wht if there's a speed bump outside your house? Just park there. everyone does it. and remember, these people "are" your neighbours and have lived there for years probably; just try to fit in more. ignore the advice here about telling them to f off; that's just rude. You might want to live there for years yourself.

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herwiththepurplehair@reddit

Depends on the speed bump and where it is, and how big OP's house frontage is. I used to live in a wee terraced house that was one room and the width of the stairs wide; if someone put a speed bump right outside there would be no way of parking unless you perched the car right on top of it. And no, the advice telling them to F off is *not* rude, at least no more rude than constantly harassing your neighbour and telling them lies about what other neighbours think of them.

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Natural_Bet6685@reddit

Whatever.

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herwiththepurplehair@reddit

“So what” “Whatever” What are you like 12 or something? Grow up.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I literally can’t, this is an image off google because I’m not putting the front of my house on the internet but there’s bollards either side like this so unless I fully park on the pavement I can’t park there https://preview.redd.it/mvvkr7xp6yug1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=a5462488cbd41ca2d57771c76ae6f5e5f47ef3c5

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Timely_Pattern3209@reddit

Laugh in her stupid face.

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GooseyDuckDuck@reddit

Why can’t you park on the speed bump?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

https://preview.redd.it/nfljmkwk3yug1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ffc91d93e4c725db43eebcb526822efbb4d0116

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GooseyDuckDuck@reddit

Haha, that answers that then 😂

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Ahhaha yeah honestly it’s the most annoying thing ever 🤣

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Throwawayaccount4677@reddit

I’ve always wanted to create an AI powered video camera so it could play ding dong the witch is dead when particular people knock on the door. Your neighbour is the exact person it would be aimed to target

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Bugsmoke@reddit

I would politely tell them to fuck off.

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barrybreslau@reddit

Does she live immediately next to you? Yes, be slightly more polite, but tell her to fuck off in a diplomatic way. No. Tell her to just fuck off.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

She lives directly across from me, so she stares into my house all the time so I’ve had to move my living room to the back of the house

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barrybreslau@reddit

Jesus wept she sounds awful. We had someone similar in our last street. We called her "apocalypse parking lady" as she had deliberately painted the situation in the street as appalling to put us off when we were house hunting. I suggest you actually speak to the neighbours she is referencing and tell them what is happening. It's tempting to tell her to fuck off, but being able to say that it's fine and that you checked with them, despite it being a public road, is less likely to make things worse. Suggest you get some net curtains, or get frosted glass if you have double glazed.

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Clear-Student-9607@reddit

It sounds like you've been more than reasonable and the other neighbors are on your side. Honestly, at this point just ignoring her letters and knocks is probably the most peaceful solution.

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tommybhoy82@reddit

Ignore her, problem solved

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VOODOO285@reddit

Seriously… Ignore her! She’s “one of them” That your other neighbours have been round suggests she’s well known as the streets busy body. Tell her you’re only going to say it once. “It is a public road and anyone can park where they like as long as it’s not causing obstruction to emergency service vehicles. Any more notes or contact about this will be considered harassment and I will inform the police” Make sure you document EVERY interaction you have with her about it. Then… IGNORE HER!

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Ridiculous comment. You are worse than the neighbour.

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VOODOO285@reddit

How so? Care to explain!

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WestleyMc@reddit

‘Look, I have tried my best to be polite but I feel like this has now become harassment. As I have already mentioned I am perfectly within my rights to park anywhere I choose on a public road and our neighbours have already explained they are ok with this. Any further communication on this matter will be reported to the police’.

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ScaredPractice4967@reddit

Ignore them or suggest they call the council and get traffic wardens around.

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oni_666uk@reddit

I'm older than you, but struggle to be assertive too, it's likely a lack of confidence on my part, too. But I've had similar issues and what helped me, was reading some American psychologists page a few years ago that suggested when people were like this to ask them a simple question, "Are you okay ?", This one thing, turns the situation around, as what they're expecting from you, is an argument or abuse etc, But if you're nice to them and feel concerned for their wellbeing, it forces their brain into a rethink. You could even buy her some flowers (or pick some from the roadside, lol) and pop round there and present them to her, apologising for your actions etc and state you'll try and be more considerate in the future of where you park. People that argue with you about petty and trivial things, Want an argument, they want you to either stand there and take it, their whole tirade, etc, whilst they vent, Or they want you to reciprocate in kind and argue back, but if you turn the tables and appear concerned for their welfare, they don't know what to do, because they're not expecting it. Doing this has helped me with 3 annoying neighbours, 1 of which now, goes out of his way to help me, even though I secretly hate them all and wouldn't piss on them if they were on fire.

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DoryanLou@reddit

If this is your only problem you're lucky. Go look at the neighbours from hell sub. You'll realise this is nothing. Just ignore her, say okay then do nothing. If no one else cares it obviously isn't a problem. She's old and clearly has nothing else to do with her day.

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Agave_Addict@reddit

Just say, go away I'm busy and you are not an official parking warden, it's a free road

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LaTroisette@reddit

Tell her to do one.

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BetaRayPhil616@reddit

Honestly, I would just disengage. Not worth your time or energy arguing as you'll never 'win'. Park where you want to park and ignore them.

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LittleUglyBug@reddit

You’re too nice which is lovely but in this situation you need to grit your teeth, stare her straight in the eyes and tell her to mind her own business. Then close the door. Everyone else will be sick of her too.

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AssociationSubject61@reddit

Tell her to fuck off and mind her own business, it’s a public road and anyone is free to park where they choose. Any further contact will result in you taking police action against her for harassment.

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Lanthanidedeposit@reddit

When I parked outside my terraced house, the car was longer than the house was wide. Fortunately my neighbours were well adjusted sentient beings and I never had a problem.

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toogoodfortheelad@reddit

Who says you can’t park on a speed bump? Its it illegal (unless there are yellow lines etc)

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Without posting the front of my house on the internet, it looks like this. I literally can’t without fully being on the pavement https://preview.redd.it/u8n9sv2p1yug1.jpeg?width=1300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=359b6c12915c3d408cd9504664c9228e4454185e

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will1565@reddit

Just ignore her, does she drive? if not, park outside her house.

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AdMoist8798@reddit

Unfortunately you just have to be firm but fair. I had an elderly woman neighbour who complained about everything from day one of moving in. When I gave her evidence to prove her wrong, she had to have a second complaint ready. I asked her going forward to put all her complaints in writing and I would respond accordingly. No verbal interactions. She tried a few times and I politely shut her down and said “in writing please” Eventually had enough evidence to pass to the authorities and get a warning issued. She started on the neighbour the other side of her and he told her where to go immediately 😂

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UCanBdoWatWeWant2Do@reddit

Reddit answers to everything are rudeness and violence, but they'd never be so courageous IRL. Power trip fantasies.

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KeremyJyles@reddit

It's not a power trip to tell a busybody to fuck off. It's not even courageous. What a life it must be where that is a "fantasy" to you.

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HeartyBeast@reddit

Feel free to post some better advice

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ClintonLewinsky@reddit

I know you dont want to escalate but is the alternative you let this person make you miserable? "Stalking and harassment is when someone repeatedly behaves in a way that makes you feel scared, distressed or threatened. If this unwanted behaviour happens two times or more, it may be a crime and you can [report it to us](https://www.police.uk/ro/report/ocr/af/how-to-report-a-crime/)." From [https://www.police.uk/advice/advice-and-information/beta-stalking-and-harassment/what-is-stalking-harassment/](https://www.police.uk/advice/advice-and-information/beta-stalking-and-harassment/what-is-stalking-harassment/) Based on the above, I would log it on 101 or the live chat function.the police may have chat and put him off

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Plastic_Truth3053@reddit

Ignore her, apart from smiling and saying hello. Park where you like. I live in a terrace too and had this nonsense from someone at first. Don’t be intimidated by them. Someone new will move in and they’ll pick on them. People are weird

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presterjohn7171@reddit

Just tell her to eff off and leave you alone or you will call the police on her for harresment .

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cactusdan94@reddit

Lmao. By UK law i think there has to be one busy-body in every street in the UK. just ignore her😂

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blomba2@reddit

Start sending her letters of minor grievances

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sjw_7@reddit

If its a public road then tell her to take a long walk on a short pier. If you are parking legally then there is nothing she can do and she can keep it to herself.

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mk6971@reddit

Write her a letter back stating the law. Ie it's a public road and people can park anywhere. Homeowners do not own the patch of road in from of their if there are no designated parking bays.

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Fuzzy-Bookkeeper-126@reddit

Yeah they used be an old lady down our road that did this. She’d stick notes on peoples cars, then the neighbours would come out and apologies to people on her behalf lol

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abstract_groove@reddit

Just tell the old bat to do one.

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PurplePlodder1945@reddit

If it carries on, I’d give the police a call and ask them to pay the neighbour a visit. My parents had to do it for someone across the road. Despite not having a driving licence, he insisted the space out the front was left free for visiting friends. He got very abusive over time with many people - always women, but I gave as good as I got. Even when we lost my father, he refused to leave the street clear so the hearse and funeral car had to block the street The police went over there a few times and explained you can’t reserve a spot and my mother also called the housing association to complain about them

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Cool_Whole_7139@reddit

Your own fault , should have told them to piss off the first time , and nipped it in the bud , now its acceptable behaviour to come winging at your door

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hanloj1@reddit

Just stick out for few more years, she might have moved on by then.....

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kalendral_42@reddit

So, wait … she’s complaining about you parking outside another neighbour’s house & the actual neighbour whose house you’re parked outside has said they don’t mind?? WTF! Just ignore her, but keep a log of anytime she hassles you & copies of any letters she sends just in case she’s nuts enough to try making actual trouble for you in some way

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

So she knocked on and said ‘ooo they won’t like that they won’t, they’ve lived here 8 years and they aren’t happy with you parking outside their house’ and they saw me on the street and came over and apologised and said they didn’t ever say that and they don’t mind me parking there

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kalendral_42@reddit

In that case definitely ignore & log - she doesn’t have a leg to stand on, even if the other neighbours were upset about it they would have to be the one to make any kind of complaint/problem about it

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pixiemeat84@reddit

I think you've been given some great advice, so can I just say I had to go back and double check that I'd read the first sentence correctly when I got to the edit with your age -you're 22 and you OWN your own Home! You Go Girl! That's such a HUGE achievement. 💪🔥🎉

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Hahah thank you 🥰 fortunately I am really good at saving money

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KoBoWC@reddit

Call social services, tell them you think she's dementing.

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crashgoggz@reddit

How old is old? And how long will it take for the problem to naturally go away?

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Pitiful_Speed_6050@reddit

She's old and has nothing else to do in her life except watch the neighbours and make up scenarios in her head. That's not being mean it's just true and kind of sad. Also you're 22 and she's not, don't stress about it. She'll be dead soon 😁

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Well she also tells me about how she watches me in my house so I just assume she has nothing better to do

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Not-That_Girl@reddit

Agree to her face, be overly nice about it, smile, slight smirk, thank her for pointing it out. Then do nothing. If the other neighbours are upset they can have a word but LEGALLY, the street is a free for all at working.

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DeeDionisia@reddit

Lots of advice on here already but if you own the house and are planning on moving, don’t escalate it, eg to a harassment claim. When you sell you have to disclose disputes with neighbours which might make selling more difficult.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I was also thinking this

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AVeryNiceBoyPerhaps@reddit

try baking something like scones or muffins and bringing them round, or invite them over for tea (if you think those options are doomed from the start then obviously don’t) but a lot of the time these elderly folk are just looking for any human interaction, even if its confrontational

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No_Life_3085@reddit

Document the harassment. Report it. I had a neighbor who harassed me for years for my refusing to let her visitors park in my assigned space. I reported them to the police and the HOA. Got them ticketed. Got them towed. If I hadn't done that, I'd have no parking spot. Some people never grow up.

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Consistent-Tree6802@reddit

Just tell her to fuck off, she doesn't own the road ffs.

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fothergillfuckup@reddit

Practically every street has one of these. We have a gate, into our front yard. There's only our house on our side, and a row of terraces on the other. Our yard has 6 foot wall round it, and open straight onto the road. It's always been hit and miss, as its blind pulling out. Some new neighbours across the street keep parking their van completely flush with the gates (which are only just wide enough to get the car through). It's completely blind on the left now. My only hope is, when the hige crash finally happens, they swerve and hit his van. The rest of the road on our side is empty. Just 10 feet further down and it would be fine. They completely block the pavement too.

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zwifter11@reddit

Explain to her you are legally entitled to park there. And you’re not obliged to move your car. She doesn’t own any of the road, even outside her own house.

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apple_kicks@reddit

> My other neighbours have come to apologise to me because she’s told me that they’re angry at me for parking outside their houses when they’re not angry at me. She just is making problems for no reason and I don’t understand why. If other neighbors are aware just arrange to say they gave you permission and its none of her business.

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plasticface2@reddit

Absolutely ignore them. Just laugh at them and get on with your day.

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FatBloke4@reddit

Make a report about the harassment to the police on the 101 website, uploading photos of any letters sent by any neighbours, stressing that you are a lone female and feel unsafe in your own home. Ideally, get a doorbell camera. I have a Reolink doorbell camera that cost under £100 and doesn't need a subscription.

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Lazy-Objective-1630@reddit

Contact your non emergency police on 101 and ask them if you can file a report for harassment and if they will explain it to her. You're doing nothing wrong and you don't want any interaction with her. Every single time she contacts you, keep all letters and record her on your phone. Make a case showing her unwanted interactions. Keep pushing and the police will have to take it seriously. Harassment is a crime and she can be fined for it at least.

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Some_Artichoke_8148@reddit

I would politely remind her she can't do that to you and if she keeps it up send her a solicitors letter explaining the definition of harrassment under the 1997 act to her - that should calm her down

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Mental-Sample-7490@reddit

22 and bought a house. Well done. No patronising intended The words you, off, qnd fuck come to mind but not in that order

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Thank you hahahah

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Ok_Introduction_1882@reddit

Just tell her to fuck off. She probably thinks she can bully you because you are so young.

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TachiH@reddit

She's elderly and you are only young. Ignore her for a few more years and no doubt the situation will resolve itself when she drops dead. 😉

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

Tell her to GTFO, and report her to your local police station for harassment. Do you really want the upheaval of your entire life just because some miserable crone next door is sticking her nose where it doesn't belong? Stick up for yourself, and stop letting other people use you for a doormat.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I’m autistic so I just struggle a lot with confrontation anyway, I don’t wanna make it worse and I don’t really thrive off getting into arguments. I literally just wanna be left alone tbh

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

People like her won't leave you alone unless you stick up for yourself. They rely on the fact you want to avoid having to deal with it. They *thrive* on the feeling of self importance it gives them and they feel completely justified when you don't do anything to defend yourself or assert some control. The confrontation is already happening regardless of how you feel. Being autistic adds another layer, but doesn't change the fact you need to stick up for yourself, because nobody else can do that for you. Almost everyone (spectrum or not) hates conflict and arguments, but we all hate shitty neighbours as well.

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FitSolution2882@reddit

Ignore her completely. Give her attention and she'll carry on.

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paulbdouglas@reddit

Just tell her to fuck right off, I had this drama with my next door neighbour, he's an absolute bellend. I ended up parking my sons car outside his house for 4 months (he was away with work) and he knows there's CCTV covering it, just to piss him right off. He knocked on the door, asking me to move it, as that is "his space" GET FUCKED!!

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ProfessorYaffle1@reddit

OK next time she knocks, speak to her - be polie but firm. say something along the lines of "I have double checked the position - this is a public road, therefore no one is entitled to reserve a space outside their own house. I have also checked with the neighbours you told me were unhappy with my parrking who have confirned to me that they understand that thi is a public road and they have no issue with me parking where space is available. I am not bloking your driveway so there should be no porbllem for you when you get deliveries. I understand that you persoanlly would prefer that I now park there,but unfortunately, there is limited space to park so it is not possibe, or reasonable, to leave an unsued space. Since I am acting both legally and reasonable, I won't be respondong further, I am at the point where you behaviour is becoming harassment and while I would prefer not to have to, if you continue to harass me I will have no alterntive but to contact the police to report your beahviour. I hope that will not be necesssary (You can leave the last part out if you want)

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RegretEasy8846@reddit

Park outside your own house? What difference does a speed bump make.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Bollards either side of the speedbump

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RegretEasy8846@reddit

Ohhh well in that case, that’s what I’d say, sternly, as in a ‘fuck off’ undertone. She must know you can’t park outside yours, what’s her expectation!

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Lanesra8989@reddit

Next time she knocks, open it wearing a scary mask, and say nothing at all , and wait there until she turns and goes

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feralhog3050@reddit

A cloak & a scythe?

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Zero_Overload@reddit

Ignore her. Treat her like a TV Licence stooge.

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Basic-Pangolin553@reddit

Don't even acknowledge it. If she continues to harass you can approach the council or the police for advice

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stowgood@reddit

Can you write fuck off in red pen and glue it to their window?

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AlwaysNorth8@reddit

If she is petty enough to micromanage neighbors parking by posting letters, print off the relevant part of the highway code which says you can park anywhere on a public highway or whatever your argument is and send it back to her. Mirror the behaviour of others unless aggressive, violent or abusive. If they do become any of those things, ever, make the dispute about that, not the parking. Blue the lines beyond comprehension. Rattles the bones off most people.

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TooHot1639@reddit

Attempting to rationally engage with her, will only encourage her.

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Slow_Net3504@reddit

I’ve recently moved into a new house and have a similar issue but the daft old sod puts wheelie bins out on the pavement when he goes out in the car so no one can park in his spot. I moved it last week and he was over knocking on to tell me to move it because ‘you’ve only been here 3 months’ I’m WFH this week so it’s staying where it is until the weekend. Every subsequent knock on the door adds a week.

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TooHot1639@reddit

Report him to the council - wheelie bins on the road when they're not to be collected is a finable offence.

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Slow_Net3504@reddit

I hadn’t thought of that one - will do, thanks

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

That’s really annoying 😒

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oportoman@reddit

She's obviously just a crank. Don't give in as you're doing nothing wrong at all.

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MojeJmenoJe@reddit

She likely has dementia.

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TooHot1639@reddit

She MAY have dementia as well as being an arsewipe.

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TooHot1639@reddit

Tell her to fuck off. No I mean it, ignore her completely unless she actually engages with you, in which case respond in the most aggressive (non-violent) way you are capable of. If you give her the tiniest of inches, she will take a mile and you will never have peace. She has lived there a long time and believes that she rules the road - you need to dissuade of this. Attempting to avoid confrontation here will either result in you living a miserable life where you're constantly trying to please and placate her on everything from parking, to when you're allowed to open your windows. You need to nip it in the bud.

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UserFortyOne@reddit

You can absolutely park anywhere you want on a public road as long as (as you say) you are not blocking anything. Having said that though, do other people do that? I live on a tiny terrace in the middle of nowhere and the unwritten and unspoken rule is that everybody only parks in front of their house, and if you have more cars than space the other one goes down the road so it's in front of the hedge. None of my neighbours would ever (and haven't ever in 14 years) park in front of my house, and I have never once parked in front of theirs. We just *don't* on this street, and that seems to keep everybody happy. You might be 100% completely in the right but still not quite reading the room. Just a thought.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

I have bollards outside my house so I can’t park there and there’s a school on my road next to mine so everyone parks everywhere all the time. I live just off a main road and people off the main road park on my street too because they don’t want their cars getting scratched, very annoying

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UserFortyOne@reddit

Gah that sounds pretty sucky. I wonder if all of that is really what's aggravating the older lady then. Parking can really cause grief between neighbours, it's actually a bit of a neurosis of mine because when I was a kid I saw my dad fall out with someone quite spectacularly when they started parking the turning circle that he needed in order to get to our house. It went on for months.

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FitSolution2882@reddit

Unless you're actually **damaging** anything (like parking on the verge) or blocking someone in, simply ignore her. Don't engage whatsoever.

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Andries89@reddit

Ignore misery my nan always said, so ignore her

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Dangerous_Towel_2569@reddit

Some elderly people take "Respect your elders" too far and some how feel like they need to police the community. Whether its neighbours like this or Elderly people sitting on community councils. They always feel the need to dictate and control everything. Perhaps its out of loneliness and no longer having a purpose. I'd perhaps document it, escalate it to the police if it continues but maybe try engaging with her in a friendlier, neighbourly way? Invite her in for a tea, try to build a relationship and it'll like stop.

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WatchingTellyNow@reddit

Keep a log of every time she sends a letter or speaks to you. Even the times when she *doesn't* mention parking. She's harassing you, and I'm fairly sure there's a law against that. If you've got a record of all the times, you've got evidence.

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Former_Moose8277@reddit

Utter confusion. Point blank refuse to acknowledge it’s your car. You can’t even drive, it couldn’t possibly be yours. You’ve got a bike you keep in your kitchen, it’s a pain as it gets in the way when you want to make dinner but it’s the only way you can get to work. You don’t want to leave it outside as you’ve heard there’s some bandits who go around putting Jelly on bike seats when no one’s looking. Your job requires you to have pristine trousers and your boss would go ballistic if you walked in with jelly all over them. It is very kind of her to offer to keep the bike in her kitchen but you need to leave very early, would she be ok if you came round at 4am every morning to collect the bike? Oh sorry my it’s my pet armadillos bed time and he just won’t settle if I don’t give him some milk beforehand. Good night.

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itsapotatosalad@reddit

Ring doorbell, ignore her when she comes to the door and bin the letters.

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FireWhiskey5000@reddit

If there are no parking restrictions you can legally park where you want. She can’t have exclusive rights to the parking spaces outside her house. Next time she bothers you tell her that this is bordering on harassment and the next time she has a go at you about it you’ll report her to the police. For most people the threat of police will be enough to stop them.

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Not_Mushroom_@reddit

"Fuck off you old cunt". She will then act all shocked and go away. Life's too short for pleasantries with conplete arseholes. She is basically harassing you and if it was the other way around I've no doubt the police would have been called etc.

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Electronic-Bus-5350@reddit

Maybe your new neighbour has a hard time adjusting to someone new moving in. The previous owner of your home must have parked somewhere ask your neighbour which spot they used and remind her she has a driveway, you're not blocking her and let her know you have spoken with other neighbours and they don't have an issue with your parking. Maybe she will lighten up after that.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

It’s weird because she’s specifically come round to the house and told me I can park outside her house. Even though I can anyway because it’s a public road and now she’s saying I can’t. It was a rental before and the tenant didn’t drive but it was empty for over a year. So I guess she’s not used to 2 new cars being on the road

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Electronic-Bus-5350@reddit

People become weird territorial over parking so at some point you will need to stop engaging with her about parking.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Yeah it’s strange, I don’t want her to come to my house and last time when she came to talk to me about parking I did just say ‘ok’ and close the door on her. I try to avoid talking about it but she just turns up 😭😭

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Nickjc88@reddit

Save all the letters and if you have a ring doorbell, save all the interactions then report her for harassment. Either that or answer the door and tell her to piss off. It seems harsh/impolite but some people just need to be told straight. Doesn't matter about her age, it's just an excuse for her to moan.

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Kid_Kimura@reddit

Just put her notes in the bin and stop answering the door when she knocks.

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lavinialloyd@reddit

Don't bin them, keep them for a record. When it becomes excessive contact the police for harassment.

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Altruistic-Brush6817@reddit

That’s what MIL’s neighbours did she was harassing them about parking, they then eventually got an ASBO because of her behaviour escalating.

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SpectreSingh89@reddit

Yes good way to go about it. Mind u, if it was me I'd probably show passive / aggressive attitude. But defintely not worth moving house. Ignore, ignore, ignore. She catches u outside? Just say yer busy, blank her and carry on doing what yer doing.

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lela7188@reddit

Some elderly people are the worst. One actually tried to run me and my daughter over as we crossed the road even though we had right of way. My elderly neighbour when we were kids would throw bricks over the fence trying to hit us cos we were out there playing! I also think some are the nicest people you'll meet, I don't want to stigmatised all elderly people.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Oh wow ! Yeah definitely not all old people but I think some maybe forget they were young once too

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lela7188@reddit

A lot think they are superior to younger people cos they've been around longer.

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soulsteela@reddit

She is lonely and has no life, just tell her to jog on.

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redheadedwildgypsy@reddit

She might have mental or emotional health issues. She might lead a very small life. She might be an embittered person. Bad neighbours have been a thing since forever and I wonder whether the last owner of your house moved for a reason. I'm sorry to hear this but you will probably just have to buckle up and ignore her. At least your other neighbours are good. Maybe speak to the police and then just tell her you have spoken to the police and they said its fine - just to scare her a little bit into calming down.

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235iguy@reddit

Busybody gonna busybody. Just ignore, nod and smile.

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CountvanSplendid@reddit

Smile and wave, boys. Smile and wave.

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grepusman@reddit

Tell her that the other neighbours likely understand the laws, and that there is not reserved parking, so she's the only one concerned. Ask why she is trying to enforce non-existent rules. It's no different than her telling people they can't drive past her house.

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Crazytimesinlove21@reddit

Why can’t you park on top of a speed bump ?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

It’s got bollards either side of it too, so unless I’m fully parking on the pavement and blocking the whole pavement, I can’t park there :(

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Crazytimesinlove21@reddit

Odd set up but I get what you mean now. Try to be as patient as possible with the old dear if you see her in person. As for the notes, just bin them

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pokaprophet@reddit

Just wait for the old cunt to die and keep driving their blood pressure up by parking exclusively outside their house

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DoctorOctagonapus@reddit

As they say in the US, tell her to pound sand.

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haggis_catcher-@reddit

Sounds like shes the karen on the street and the other neighbours have probably had dealings before with her

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LargeLetter1@reddit

I appreciate some people don’t feel comfortable with confrontation. Particularly with someone who seems angry and the argument may escalate. In this case write a clear letter outlining your right to park in your street and the neighbours have confirmed it’s not an issue with them. Tell her you consider the matter closed and you will treat further communications from her on the matter as harassment. It’s possible she has fixated on this issue because she’s got dementia. Please don’t take it personally.

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Big8cock4u@reddit

Ask her for help with the council to relocate the speed bump

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Frugal500@reddit

Are other people in the street parking on the speed bump? Are you by any chance keeping your house clear at the expense of everyone else?

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

The council have put bollards outside my house because of the speedbump so you can’t park on it

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chronicbint@reddit

Boxing stance

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Leather-Shoulder-674@reddit

Speak to the police and have her banged up for her last few years for harassment

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UCanBdoWatWeWant2Do@reddit

Yeah sure they'll put someone in jail for years for that

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Great-Science-8586@reddit

Be considerate but don't allow yourself to be bullied!

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Intruder313@reddit

Tell her she’s wrong and to leave you alone Also the speed bump is surely not that much of a barrier to you ?

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Delicious-Fee-6225@reddit

Let her continue, document every single interaction, tell her after a month of documenting everything that you’ve got grounds to report her for harassment & if she doesn’t stop bothering you that you’ll take the appropriate next steps to ensure the hassle stops. You can legally park wherever you want on a street with free parking.

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doctorgibson@reddit

Put the letters back through her door

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Kim_catiko@reddit

Tell her you won't park near her house for the delivery she mentioned, but other than that, you will park where you like as long as it is legal. It is a public road. Tell her you don't want to hear about it again but you are more than happy to have a chat about other things. Sounds like typical old person who has nothing better to do, offer friendship and she might shut up about the parking.

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G2022B@reddit

"I've explained my position on this, please go away" \*Close door in face\*.

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ShowmasterQMTHH@reddit

Sometimes people like that react better to inviting her in for a cup of tea, being super nice and empathising that the parking locally is shit, and you appreciate she's trying to help out, but that really there's nothing you can do about it, and you've also spoken to the neighbours she's concerned for, and they have no problem with the parking. You mention she has a drive way, tell her how lucky she is to have that for deliveries and if she wants to borrow your tools to assemble anything, to let her know. If you take away the things she has to complain about by being her ally, it disarms the mania. Or just tell her to fuck off.

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PhysicsForeign1634@reddit

Tear the notes into small pieces and post them back through her letterbox. Or park on her driveway.

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ARobertNotABob@reddit

Gatekeepers abound. Stick a note back saying "It is a public road, I am causing no obstruction. You may call the police if you think otherwise."

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Slothjitzu@reddit

When did we stop telling people to fuck off?

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Big_Block_5271@reddit

Decent people never started, they use communication that conveys reasoning.

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Slothjitzu@reddit

I mean, the reasoning doesn’t get much clearer than when saying fuck off.

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No_Effective_4481@reddit

Unreasonable people don't respond to decent communication that conveys reasoning, or else they wouldn't be causing vindictive crap like this in the first place.

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New_Book131@reddit

I would ignore her. She has no right to ask you to do any of these things.

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Inevitable-Chance-8@reddit

Have a conversation with them. Make sure uou keep a record of every time they knock or letter ring door bell) If they are not listening, tell them that if they do not desist, uou have all ghe evidence uou need to report yhem for harrassment to both the local police andbthe council. Hopefully it will make them think twice about it again, but if not, please do report yhem. Inless there is some come back on them, yhey will not stop!

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Paulstan67@reddit

This is bordering on harassment. Next time she comes round whip out your phone and start videoing her, politely tell her it's a public street and you are allowed to park where you want and you don't want her harassing you any more. Keep a note of all letters and contact. If this continues report her to the police. Just as a point if you own the property and are selling up then neighbour disputes MUST be disclosed to the potential purchaser. In my experience (I was an estate/letting agent for 15 years and have moved houses a lot) this sort of behaviour won't stop , think once a Karen always a Karen. It may pause but something will trigger and it will start again.

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Heathy94@reddit

We had a speed bump directly outside my old terraced house but I always parked on it if I had to. So you can if you want to. I'd just explicitly say I'll obviously try not to park like a nuisance and ideally outside your own house like most people would but if you can't you will and are well within your rights to park anywhere else on this road. If she carries on I'd just blatantly ignore her or document all her visits and letters and report her to the police with all the evidence of her harrassing you.

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Tastetherainbow_2016@reddit

Lonely old busybody who probably just needs human interaction. My old neighbour was the same when we first moved in, used knock on the door complaining if I so much as put the washing machine on past 6pm. In this case I told her to piss off because she was foul-mouthed and aggressive. If your neighbour is more of a polite sweet old lady who’s just a bit lonely, maybe you could make friends and kill it with kindness? Or tell her to piss off. Your call.

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gxb20@reddit

Just my 2 cents but my friend was stabbed to death in an argument about a parking space. Just be careful of fucking mental people, you have no idea how far theyre willing to go over something that truly doesnt matter

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Dramatic_Honey8209@reddit

So this has been happening for almost a year? Sounds like you are waiting for her to get bored and stop, but doesnt sounds like she will- sounds like its one of the only things she has going on in her life. Theres two approaches in my opinion- one, meet her head on and tell her to back down. I doubt this will work and will probably be the drama she is after. Two, kill her with kindness. Invite her in for a cuppa, get to know her a little- whats her story, how long has she been living on the street/ in the area etc. Empathise with her and become her friend- people like that will defend their own to the death, and see the world as us vs them. Just my opinion, having had a similar situation when i was younger- i used to play drums and it drove the neighbour mad. He was a grumpy old git and his wife was the complete opposite. I tried to play at times that were appropriate- during the day, and only for 30mins at a time, but nothing mattered- he hated the noise. Stopped playing for a while and always politely greeted him whenever we saw him, eventually he went from growling at us to giving a silent quick nod which was the best we were gonna get tbh. Sadly he passed away shortly after. I picked up playing the drums again, but ended up agreeing with Vera (his wife) to do it on the weekend when she was usually out visiting so a win-win. Might not work out for you this way but fingers crossed it sorts itself out!

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EvilTaffyapple@reddit

Tell her there is no assigned parking and she is out of luck.

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box_frenzy@reddit

Why can’t you park on a speed bump? But yeah park wherever you like. They need to wind their neck in.

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Burnatheburner@reddit (OP)

Got bollards either side of it

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mr_kaliyuga@reddit

Start sending her notes to clean her windows or something. Just go bizarre on her. It could be very enjoyable.

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DrMacAndDog@reddit

Ignore them.

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thebarrcola@reddit

Honestly at this point I’d be past being kind to her. I’d tell her in no uncertain terms that I’ll park anywhere I want and warn her that if she keeps winding me up, the cheapest box van on fb marketplace will be finding a new home outside her house for as long as I can keep it mot’d.

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lorde_lorde_yayaya@reddit

Tell her if she thinks its that much of a problem to call the police, they'll tell her there's nothing wrong with what you're doing. Then tell her if she bothers you with this again then you'll report her for harrassment

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Particular-Swim-9293@reddit

Just carry on with good grace. Send her a polite note explaining that the other neighbours have told you that they don't mind. A touch of honey can keep things sweet in your neighbourhood. If she's just a natural troublemaker she'll get no drama out of that and won't bother you any more. If she's genuinely worried about her neighbours it'll put her mind at ease. Worth a try anyway.

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limpingdba@reddit

An alternative to telling her to fuck off is to befriend her but keep parking where you are and just change the subject when she mentions it. She's probably just desperate for some interaction, so offer her in for a brew and ask her for gardening tips or something. I guess it depends on how much spare time you have for her.

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Tall-Reputation-9519@reddit

Invite her in for a cup of tea, she could just be lonely.

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Chrykal@reddit

Just ignore her, whenever she tries to talk to you shut it down and tell her you're not interested. It sounds like she's only turning the street against her rather than you, so just enjoy the neighbours who are nice and wait for her to pop her clogs.

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GuybrushFunkwood@reddit

Tell her it’s nothing to do with her … if she knocks again just phone the police and tell them she’s harassing you. You don’t give half wits an inch or they’ll keep coming back. Best case scenario she ignores you and you can happily get on with your life while hers ticks down

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PrunusSpin0sa@reddit

"I'm happy to chat, but not about parking" If she pushes it "get knotted"

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Growling_Salmon@reddit

Just tell them to fuck off. It's not very nice but hopefully they'll get the message

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nikkijxd@reddit

If the other neighbours are ok this is a self resolving problem. I would get a video doorbell and just not answer when she knocks. As others have suggested she might be lonely. I would make small offers to help like "When i take my bins out would you like me to grab yours too?" Its hard to be mad at someone who is being kind.

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spectrumero@reddit

You have a bin, right? Put the notes in the bin, unread.

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According-Let3541@reddit

Ignore her. She is continuing because she’s getting a response. Don’t give her any reaction at all- ignore her, bin letters, don’t answer the door to her. If she tries to talk to you, ask her to put it in writing and then continue binning it. She’s a busybody who has decided to make you her latest target. Just completely block her out and be rude if you need to - ‘I am not talking to you about parking. Please leave me alone’ and walk away. She will soon get the hint and leave you alone. If you want to push it a bit harder, the local PCSO might be worth contacting to say you feel she’s reached harassment territory but I suspect that might escalate beyond what is required. You can also go full nutcase and match her energy. Print off the Highway Code or whatever says the rules on parking and post it through her door every time she annoys you. Put a note through saying you’re expecting a delivery and so her car needs to be tucked into her drive entirely to prevent access issues on the street.

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Delicious-Pitch5956@reddit

Nothing keep on parking street ain’t hers

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GrownDandilion@reddit

Any letter she sends you simply right return to sender and dont pay the postage. (I am petty). When she knocks on the door either dont answer it or when you do and she says anything about anyone's feeling or thoughts else simply say "thank you for bringing it to my attention but if they have an issue ask them to talk to me directly". If she mentions anything else about parking or her own concerns say "thank you but as its a public street I wont be moving my car" and simply close the door. Anything further an asker her to direct her complaints to the counsel as you wont be engaging further.

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AfraidOstrich9539@reddit

Ignore her. Don't give her the time of day and park where you want on a public road.

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Automatic-Plan-9087@reddit

Just ask her if her carers know she’s out on her own

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strooplard@reddit

Ask her to stop. If she does it again, that meets the legal threshold for harassment. Or you can just ignore her.

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TerryGranules@reddit

Just tell them you no longer wish to speak to them and anything they put through the door will go straight in the bin until they learn to mind their own business.

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Odd-Artichoke-5123@reddit

Hand her the keys and tell her to work away herself

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PristineDouble423@reddit

Has she lived there a very long time? If so maybe she remembers back to a time when there were fewer cars and everyone could park outside their own house? No excuse for harassing you of course. If she’s the only one with a problem then tell her to share her concerns with local council parking enforcement, who will hopefully educate her.

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mas-sive@reddit

You’re not sling anything illegal as you said it’s a public road, they just think they own the place. You could say you’re getting by harassed, which technically you are and go down that route.

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ProudMastodon1@reddit

Easiest thing to do is to just park where you like and tell her not to speak to you again. Second easiest thing to do is to park somewhere else.

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