HR needs to just have stacks of these. “We have accepted feedback that you were not happy with a pizza party in lieu of year end bonuses or merit increase, so this year, we’ve decided to give you pizza pants instead. Happy Holidays from everyone at Human Resources.”

“P.S. please come by the office and collect these by December 16th because everyone in HR and all of your supervisors got an extra 2 weeks of paid vacation in addition to our bonuses and salary increases.”