Just saw this in a Swedish sub. Is it common for people from your country who moved abroad & married a foreigner to still give their children ethnic Balkan names?
Posted by Substratas@reddit | AskBalkans | View on Reddit | 84 comments
OkoMushrooom@reddit
I’m thankful to my mom every day for putting her foot down and choosing a continental European name.
equili92@reddit
What's a continental european name?
OkoMushrooom@reddit
Names you’d find in every European country that are just normal like Leo, Martin, Mario, Nicholas, Dario, Oliver, Maxim, Timothy, Carlo, Alexander, Stefan, Antonio, Matthew, Theo, Marco, Constantine, Luka, Filip, Lazar, Pavel, Daniel etc.
equili92@reddit
That's just a mish mash of popular names from different countries, Carlo would sound weird in Finland, Nicholas would feel weird in Serbia if spelled with ch and s at the end, while it would be weird in france if it was spelled with a k. Luka would. While Filip sounds normal in ex-yu it wouldn't be normal if it was spelled as Philippe
OkoMushrooom@reddit
I’m just giving you an Idea of normal names that can be found all over Europe, their spelling Luka/Luca, Filip/Philip Marko/Marco is inconsequential they’re still of the same origin.
equili92@reddit
I just told you that spelling is very important, people don't bat an eye at the origin of the name, just how it sounds
OkoMushrooom@reddit
And I’m telling you it isn’t no ones going to care if you’re Teodor or Theodor
equili92@reddit
I had a classmate spelled philip and he had to change schools until he was out of schools to change....and that's almost a passable difference, imagine a Matija whose parents spelled the name Mathew...that kid wouldn't get a chance to change schools
OkoMushrooom@reddit
I have absolutely no idea what you’re trying to imply with the absolute nonsense that is your school changing scenario but learn from your friend’s mistake I guess and don’t name your child something that has a strong ethnic stink to it, the child will thank you later in life. However if I was that person named Matija I would be reminded of Matthias an Icelandic guy from the band Hatari, they were on Eurovision, I loved their song and the singer is also cute so the name gets a pass.
equili92@reddit
Feel free to read it again then.....you can't word it simpler than that
_KingOfTheDivan@reddit
I also don’t get it. Do you get bullied if your name is written in a different way in Bosnia? I’d expect everyone to just adapt and call you a native equivalent
Aggressive-Prize-522@reddit
Also alot of those names are Christian names, nothing wrong with that but they are not "neutral" just because they are common.
OkoMushrooom@reddit
There is no such thing as neutral, there are only smart and not so smart parents.
Aggressive-Prize-522@reddit
What a sad and narrow world you must live in.
OkoMushrooom@reddit
Actually my world has all the colors of the rainbow in it but thats beside the point. The point is if you live in Sweden and are stubborn about these kind of things, you are the one who is making your offspring live in that type of a sad&narrow world so be smart, be a responsible parent and don’t mess up.
equili92@reddit
Yeah, it's not peer pressure, it's peer motivation to change to conform to their standards....and that's...right?! According to you?
OkoMushrooom@reddit
Yes exactly, if you’re not living in Bosnia anymore and are living in Sweden, It is expected of you to assimilate. What about this don’t you understand?
equili92@reddit
Imagine saying shit like this to Germans living in Slovenia. Hi Hans, I expect that you give your child the name Žiga because we expect you to assimilate... Damn...it certainly is an opinion.
OkoMushrooom@reddit
It is but it is also a very necessary opinion to maintain the very thing about Sweden that attracts everyone to live there, or used to anyway. Or are you one of those people that likes to live in balkanized ghettos abroad that excludes the host country? Because those people make me depressed.
equili92@reddit
I lived in Slovenia not Sweden and nobody here felt pressure to change names or felt that it was needed to do to make the country better. Follow the laws and respect the customs and the different roots of immigrants just make the country richer in a cultural sense
OkoMushrooom@reddit
Nobody’s talking about you changing your name we are talking about what the implications will be for your child if you live in Sweden and give your child a wrong name.
Aggressive-Prize-522@reddit
The implications come from other people being narrow minded and racist. And if you were a bit more open to other people's experiences you'd know that the ghettos you talk about are not by choice. They are indeed depressing but have been forced upon people because other people choose to look down on them. And in your logic being exposed to ethnic cleansing and having no choice but to flee to save yourself and your kids, then being treated like a second grade citizen by many should just make you try harder to make yourself and your family invisible. It is one thing to obey laws, work for a living and lead a normal live. It is another to erase yourself at the will and benefit of others "discomfort".
equili92@reddit
I worded it poorly but I meant change name as in change the name of the child from what you would like it to be to what some people expect you to do.....change name was shorter to write
OkoMushrooom@reddit
No one cares for cultural enrichment anymore that ship sailed many years ago, the fact of the matter is are you going to give your kid a head start in life or make him/her deal with things they don’t need to deal because naming things and people is a powerful thing that should not be underestimated.
StPauliPirate@reddit
You are perfectly assimilated in Swedistan with a muslim name lol most western european nations are way past the point of no return
OkoMushrooom@reddit
And even if that is the case that doesn’t mean anyone has to contribute any more fuel to the fire.
OkoMushrooom@reddit
There is no such thing as neutral, there are only smart&dumb parents.
CmdrJemison@reddit
I'm thankful my parents gave me a very very croatian name despite me being born in germany
Substratas@reddit (OP)
That’s what every parent should do 👏👏👏
Poglavnik_Majmuna01@reddit
Seems like not even balkaners are capable of comprehending the concept of assimilation.
Yeah that tells us everything we need to know.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
https://i.redd.it/144bu5zkctug1.gif
Separate_Business880@reddit
Her first and biggest mistake was marrying a Balkan man. 9/10 will be like this. Patriarchal, traditional, and rigid.
Men in diaspora are actually more likely to be even more conservative than men back home because they stick to their small, tight knit, and poorly integrated ethnic communities.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
The way you clocked that tea 👏👏👏
https://i.redd.it/5qqhn1aqbtug1.gif
Jermajestyandtony@reddit
Yes? i think everybody does this, many cultures choose family names that have significance
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Yes, but you can’t do shit like that when you want to mix with a local from the country you’ve permanently settled in.
Jermajestyandtony@reddit
In my country its very common, an ethnic name doesnt hold people back professionally and is usually regarded with interest.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
In Sweden, your likelihood of getting hired drops tremendously, especially if your name is of islamic origins. Like Ibrahim, Ahmed, Mohamed, etc, etc.
Aras1238@reddit
Wtf? The hiring stuff needs to be rehired then. Loosing good candidates because they don't like their names, that's shooting yourself on the foot...
Panzerscout_SRB@reddit
If your name is Ibrahim, Ahmed, Mohamed, you should seek employment in Iraq not Sweden.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
It’s not the hiring stuff - it’s the whole society.
You can still get a good job - but overall it’s still much more difficult for people with Arabic / Islamic sounding names to even be called for an interview. And it has been a problem for decades.
gushi1-@reddit
Oh well, keep the name Bosnians or Swedish. No need to have an Arabic name neither are Arabic.
equili92@reddit
That seems like mild racism .....also i don't bend to racism so i would name my child the most ethnic name i could muster if i lived in Sweden
Substratas@reddit (OP)
It is racism and it’s horrible, but remember that it’s your child’s life at stake when you try to do that. You can change your name into an Arabic one & fight for the cause, yet still make your child’s life easier by giving them a name that won’t get them bullied at school.
equili92@reddit
If it came to the point that the child is bullied for their name, I would not really be sure if we were supposed to live there, probably would move....
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Bingo!
https://i.redd.it/5a37684lmpug1.gif
Ujemegaz@reddit
Neither my mother, nor father did not care. The first name they were suggested by some family member, they said okay, and now they brag that they chose our names.
That-Wrangler-7484@reddit
Same. My mother "played" with my grandma's name and even though I am named after her, my name is quite different and modern (unusual and only a handful of women have it) I consider it my own.
Jermajestyandtony@reddit
Aw, that sounds cute that they were happy with their choice. I know ethnic albanians, greeks, montenegrins, turks, serbs and macedonians who were born abroad but still have traditional names from their countries. Funnily enough my cousins in the balkans mostly named their daughters more trendy names like Isabella, Sara, Maya, Krystal etc
CypriotGreek@reddit
Compromise and call him Zlatan Ibrahimović
Problena@reddit
This. It's both Bosnian and Seedish.
theystolemyusername@reddit
Not at all. I know people whose foreign-born grandkids are named Ocean and the like, lol.
CmdrJemison@reddit
Is it common to not?
GustavIIIWasGay@reddit
This child will be named Johan. End of discussion.
Big-Vegetable4550@reddit
We (me American, wife Croatian) thought long and hard about a name for out daughter. We wanted a Croatian name that wouldn’t get murdered or mocked by Americans, not an easy order. Luckily, my wife’s grandmother (a sweet Baka beloved by all her twenty grandchildren) name was Matea. Even most Americans don’t get that one wrong. My daughter was initially upset at having a name no one else around her had, but then she met her 2nd cousins, 4 of whom are named Matea too (from the same Baka).
equili92@reddit
If I had to bet i would say that 80% add an "h" after the "t"
Big-Vegetable4550@reddit
No - in fact I never heard any American do that in 23 years. Probably because they may have heard the Italian boys’ name Matteo.
equili92@reddit
Weird, almost the same name as Matija (my nephew) and everybody in the states spells his name as mathia(s)
Big-Vegetable4550@reddit
Ah - could be a regional thing - we were in Chicago - lot’s of Poles and southern Slavs and Italians, so maybe the Americans there were more exposed. We avoided names with a ‘j’ because Americans invariably pronounce that like a ‘đ’ as in Jack, so Matija would be pronounced something like Mah tai đah. Painful to the ears. My own mother couldn’t pronounce my landlord’s daughter’s name (Jasna) when she came to Croatia for my wedding. I told her to just think ‘yes-no’ and it would be closer than the murder she was doing to the name 😂!
AirWolf231@reddit
Thats how its done, try to find a name that is good in both countries is the best solution.
arcane_labor92@reddit
Ha, Matea is a name we also considered. Opted for something else do, but still one that makes sense in Bulgarian and internationally.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Matea is a gorgeous name 😍
The girl in the OP is writing ”the name sounds religious” - that’s the politically correct way of saying ”My husband wants our child to be called either Ibrahim or Ahmed.” 😂
jesushatedbacon@reddit
Something ending with -mir can cover both. Or name them after a cigarette brand
tomgatto2016@reddit
"Marlboro! Camel! Winston! Come here, fast!"
GeneralButtNekid@reddit
Drina is naice
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Kent is beautiful, but it sounds like a surname. Tarabosh is peak ghetto 😂😂😂
gushi1-@reddit
I have 3 kids- one name Greek, 2 kid name is Slavic, 3 kid name is Latin. I’m Albanian, liked the way the name sounds and went with it. 2/3 names are commonly used in 🇺🇸. My name first name is Slavic. Him being Bosnian, if he chose a Slavic name I think that would be fine. I wouldn’t put a Muslim name may effect the kids future.
GeneralButtNekid@reddit
What are the names you chose
StPauliPirate@reddit
Mohammed Lee
gushi1-@reddit
Prefer not to say,
Ujemegaz@reddit
Karuc could sound swedish enough.
PecansPecanss@reddit
No, not really
Substratas@reddit (OP)
He doesn’t mean that, he’s just throwing shade at me by using Albanian curse words. 😂
PecansPecanss@reddit
Ah I see... and here I was trying to find associations to the word Karuc 😭 the closest I got is horse wagon, "karutsa" in Bulgarian
Substratas@reddit (OP)
But does it sound Bosnian enough though?
Stverghame@reddit
I mean, many if not most of Serb kid names have their international version, they don't sound too weird abroad.
Novio024@reddit
This is one of those things an intercultural couple should discuss before entering in a relationship
Discipline_Cautious1@reddit
Every Balkan muslim in diaspora: I ll call my son Lion.
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Lol, they do that when they live in the hood. Lion, Liam & Kevin are the typical names associated with the white ghetto.
RedditAnonDude@reddit
By Bosnian, do you mean Muslim? There are plenty of generic Balkan names, some possibly similar to Swedish names. Neven, Dino, Ivan….
Environmental-Pea-97@reddit
Gunnar
Substratas@reddit (OP)
Afaik there are no Gunnars under 80 years old in Sweden, but I’d still rather name my child Gunnar than Ibrahim.
Environmental-Pea-97@reddit
Vikingur then.
Cefalopodul@reddit
Yes.
Meowmeowmeow31@reddit
This is extremely common in my country, though people in mixed marriages often try to find names that are easily pronounceable in both languages.