In your personal life, is alcohol a big part of social gatherings?
Posted by Dont_app@reddit | AskAnAmerican | View on Reddit | 188 comments
I’m curious how central alcohol is in everyday social situations.
Is it something that’s almost always present, or not really?
WinterRevolutionary6@reddit
It’s normal but not expected. When gathering with people my age, we don’t usually drink because it’s expensive when going out but if there’s something at someone’s house we’ll probably have some wine. If I’m eating with family at a nice restaurant about 50-70% of adults will order alcohol of some sort and it’s normal to order something or not order something no one bats an eye either way.
I typically have about 1-4 alcoholic drinks per month.
MortynMurphy@reddit
This is going to be such a mixed bag of answers. The real answer is that Americans can be anywhere on the alcoholic spectrum, from completely sober to "don't light a match when they exhale."
Some regional cultures are a bit weird about it, like mine. They know they drink, they know they love to drink. But without fail, every single holiday, anything stronger than wine must be consumed outside the house. Wine or beer inside the house is fine, liquor is not. I think it's because the county used to be very strict back in the day, my other grandfather was a moonshiner and kept the same rule. Anyway, the host will be outside drinking it with us, by the way. So it's not their personal rule, it's just what they've always done.
hippiechick725@reddit
Southern US?
MortynMurphy@reddit
Yep! It was so hard to explain to my now-husband lol
DangerousHour2094@reddit
This is funny, and shows how experiences vary! Alcohol was never a shy subject for us, when my uncles got their basement furnished, the focal point was the bar. My Dad built one of his own post retirement
CupBeEmpty@reddit
Baptists? I have seen them do the “we don’t drink at home” but we do drink type of thing.
MortynMurphy@reddit
My mother's side was Baptist, my father's was Methodist, it was a whole thing when they were trying to figure out which church to get married in. (Also my grandmothers refused to speak to each other, in a town of less than 600 at the time, after they got in a fender bender on main street when my parents were kids. So there's that, too) They both do the alcohol thing though.
_handlemewithcare_@reddit
I want to hear more about this! I can envision it from my Gran’s small “village”.
MortynMurphy@reddit
Two houses, each alike in dignity, in fair Duplin County, North Carolina where we lay our scene;
This was in the 1960s. Both women blamed the other for running a stop sign, when in fact both of them had run said stop sign with all of their children in the vehicles. My aunts', uncles' and my parents' stories all matched well into their adulthoods and they never wavered when asked what the true cause of the accident was: Both sets of kids had been acting out in public and my grandmothers had been getting after them from the front seat. Grandmama preferred the flyswatter for reach and speed, while Meme was partial to a wooden spoon she kept handy.
CupBeEmpty@reddit
Heh. Small town Protestants do be like that.
Kingsolomanhere@reddit
Both sides of my family were baptist and there was never drinking of any kind at family get to gathers or even once a year family reunions. Any drinking was during fishing or at the local bar after work.
CupBeEmpty@reddit
Yeah sounds about right. What’s the old joke?
How do you keep a Baptist from drinking all your beer when fishing?
Invite a second Baptist.
hippiechick725@reddit
I get it 😂
dangleicious13@reddit
Lifelong southerner. Never heard of that.
MortynMurphy@reddit
Like I tell people on Reddit all the time, the American South is not one single cultural monolith. Not surprised at all to hear that other Southerners didn't have the same experience.
_handlemewithcare_@reddit
No one in my family would overtly bring in alcohol. Anything of that sort is consumed outdoors.
Dr_Watson349@reddit
That is definitely top 10 wildest shit I’ve read on Reddit.
juanzy@reddit
I don’t know if it’s just a culture I’m not a part of or the teetotalers/kids here that don’t really know yet.
Stop_Already@reddit
This is so dumb.
A shot of whiskey has the same amount of alcohol as a glass of wine. Assigning moral value to one but not the other is silly af.
Religious people are…interesting.
Not_an_alt_69_420@reddit
Religion has nothing to do with it. It's acceptable to have a couple beers after work, but if you tell people you go home and drink whiskey, they're going to think you have a problem.
The difference is the amount of alcohol you drink, and how long it takes to down it. Most people don't sip on a single shot of whiskey over the course of an hour, or limit it to one or two drinks in a sitting.
hx87@reddit
The whole culture around "hard liquor must be drunk quickly and repeatedly" is just so weird to me. I'd absolutely sip a shot of whiskey over an hour and call it a day.
Stop_Already@reddit
You’re assuming people only drink hard liquor as shots. Mixed drinks are a very, very common thing and are quite popular.
Mocktails are HUGE in the northeast right now - almost every restaurant I’ve been to has a section of the menu dedicated to them.
Mixed drink vs beer vs wine = same amount of alcohol
Again - moralizing one over the others.
MortynMurphy@reddit
The cognitive dissonance is very real lol. I don't follow the same rules at my house and they are genuinely confused about it (seasoned with a bit of judgement and smugness, obviously).
Standard_Plant_8709@reddit
What do you mean "outside the house"? (I'm from Northern Europe, never heard about this)
Like... you take a bottle of vodka, step out on your front lawn and start drinking there?
MortynMurphy@reddit
Usually in the garage, workshop, that kind of space. It's often a separate building on the property, but not always. No liquor crosses the threshold of the living spaces during those holidays that I've seen (whether or not they bring it in when they don't have company is a whole other story).
HowsMyBuddy@reddit
Is this a familial or religious thing, or actually regional? I’ve never come across it, so it’s legitimately fascinating.
MortynMurphy@reddit
A bit of all of the above. Not all of the South is like this, and some people outside the South might not drink liquor in the house. My family is from a dry county and one side used to do some bootlegging so there's probably an element of "oh well it's not in my house so they can't search my house now."
Weird_Squirrel_8382@reddit
My family's from Ohio and Kentucky, and looking back, the people who did drink never did so in the house. It had to be an outdoor picnic. Only exception I think was a hot toddy with bourbon if someone was sick.
sammysbud@reddit
I’m a southerner as well and the whole “drink liquor outside” is new to me, but the general sentiment is true.
My parents rarely drank and that was only ever a glass of wine/beer on occasion. Even as an adult, if I reach for a second glass of wine at a family function, I get a disapproving look. I was like 26 one Christmas and got a bottle of wine for my friend to drink on our porch to catch up. I got the “a whole bottle for the two of you?? Yall are trying to get drunk?” from my mom lol.
In high school, everybody drank but there were like unspoken rules. Being perceived as a “good Christian” was more important than anything so you’d get drunk with friends then deny it the next day. Most of my friends’ parents had the same sentiment towards alcohol, even though they knew all the kids drank.
MortynMurphy@reddit
Like I tell people all the time, the South is not one single cultural monolith, so it's not surprising to hear the differences in how people approach alcohol.
My family is from ENC, a particularly odd and understudied region in Southern History. If you know your nitty gritty Civil War History, I'm a direct descendant or relative of 7 of the 21 citizens unlawfully imprisoned and executed in Kinston (Feb - Apr 1864) by Confederate General Pickett for swearing allegiance to NC, not the Confederacy, for not reporting for the Confederate army, and for not dying in vain when the Union "took" (was welcomed into) New Bern and Beaufort.
DawaLhamo@reddit
I wouldn't say a big part. A lot of people I hang out with have cut way back or stopped in general (ages between 40 and 70). I have, too, tbh. At some gatherings we share a bottle or two of wine between 5 or more people, at some gatherings there is none at all and it's not missed.
I'm pretty sure that these answers will vary WIDELY.
Able-Seaworthiness15@reddit
Not for me, I haven't had an alcoholic beverage in over 25 years. Personal choice, I never liked how any alcohol tasted so I decided why drink something I don't like.
annang@reddit
About half of Americans don’t drink at all (never or less than once a year). Of those who do, the top 10% of drinkers consume more than half of the alcohol in the country. So it’s really going to depend.
passisgullible@reddit
Yes, parties with adults present there is either beer or wine, depending on the formality.
byebybuy@reddit
Just to add to that: not just parties. Bowling alleys, movie theaters, sporting events, concerts, plays, snack bars, restaurants and bars (obviously), even some odd places like kids indoor playgrounds.
When you stop drinking you notice that it is everywhere. I think people who are responding that it's not a part of their lives are misinterpreting OP's question. It's a massive part of American life (but not specifically a US thing). It might not be central, but it's almost omnipresent.
*This is all location dependent. I'm in the Bay Area.
Blobwad@reddit
Wisconsin here, anywhere you want it you can have it basically.
That said, nothing tops my surprise landing in Dublin at 6am to see people sitting at the airport bar with a beer, and the Burger King meal menu having a beer option. It’s not just WI and not just US.
Amockdfw89@reddit
Yea Airports in general are one of the few places drinking that early is socially acceptable
trinite0@reddit
Time is an illusion. Time in airports, doubly so.
WhatABeautifulMess@reddit
No rules at the airport. It’s like International waters.
ForestOranges@reddit
We did not have alcohol in movie theaters growing up, it was a bit of a culture shock when I moved.
byebybuy@reddit
Yeah I'm like 95% sure it wasn't available in movie theaters where I grew up either (SoCal). It's still a little weird to see it served there.
Stop_Already@reddit
Indeed. It’s kinda gross because it’s actually pretty bad for people - drinking has been proven time and time again to be bad for us.
But there’s money to be made so that gets pushed aside in favor of profit.
byebybuy@reddit
It's awful when you stop to think about it. Millions of people hurt and killed each year in alcohol-related accidents, disease, abuse...lives ruined on a massive scale.
I don't think prohibition is the answer, but I would love to see it acknowledged as at least as dangerous as smoking, and therefore extremely limited in advertisement in a similar way.
Stop_Already@reddit
Instead? I get downvoted by a few people.
People don’t like to hear they are actively causing themselves harm, I guess. Cognitive dissonance is a hell of a thing.
/shrug
NumberOk9619@reddit
The "Green" Bay area, by chance?
byebybuy@reddit
lol, no but I hear it's very similar over there.
shelwood46@reddit
I grew up in GB, then moved to NJ and then PA. In WI, they issue a liquor license for every 300 in population. Out here, it's every 30,000 (many sitdown restaurants are BYOB) and they've only just started to loosen up the liquor laws, which are arcane and really strict. It was quite a culture shock when I moved.
juanzy@reddit
Even when I’m doing dry January, I’ll stock my fridge and have a house cocktail available for guests
Eat-Ca-Ca@reddit
Yup!
phenomenomnom@reddit
Not everyone drinks, but if alcohol isn't at least offered, to be very honest, I will be expecting a boring evening with people who do not understand how fun works.
This is based upon many very social years of entertaining and being entertained.
Alcohol is as important as a signal of conviviality as it is useful as a social lubricant.
It's an acknowledgement of the happy sociability of the occasion. It's "good cheer" being offered.
In fact, if you invite me to dinner, I am very likely to show up with a bottle of wine, which you can open or not that night, whichever you prefer -- it's just a traditional gift for a host/hostess: it implies that we all anticipate a fun and amicable time to be shared -- in a different way from tea or lemonade.
(Of course I'd choose a different gift if I knew the host did not partake. But that makes it harder to figure out what is suitable.)
Aloh4mora@reddit
No, not in my own personal life. We hang out primarily playing D&D or watching TV together, and we don't drink during these activities.
My birth family in the Midwest is composed of professional alcoholics.
Ryan_TX_85@reddit
Yes, there is always beer when my buddies come to hang out.
baalroo@reddit
It's sometimes around, sometimes not, but it certainly isn't playing a "big part." No more than coca cola.
Used_Return9095@reddit
It really depends who you hangout with. But for me yes. That or boba.
SomeBroOnTheInternet@reddit
Never not present. Even at kids birthday parties usually there's a cooler or a bar for the adults.
Cinisajoy2@reddit
I went to kids church party once, where the soft drinks were put in a cooler so the kids with churchy parents didn't see the case of beer in the refrigerator. When the youth minister asked me to help move some drinks, I didn't know whether to throw up, call him a hypocrite, put some beers in the cooler or just call my mom to come get me. If he hadn't been preaching all throughout church camp, if you drink you are going to H***, I wouldn't have given it a thought.
Traditional-Roof-980@reddit
For me? No
For a lot of, if not most, Americans? ...probably (from what I can tell, at least)
Which is why I try to avoid most-any 'special' occasions involving liquor (and definitely don't go to bars and the like), unless I know for sure there's at least something palatable and easily-available, beverage-wise
Cinisajoy2@reddit
All bars with have a variety of soft drinks and club soda.
xxxHAL9000xxx@reddit
Its regional. and its on the decline in most areas. 20 years ago you were weird if you were under 40 and you didn’t drink at least 10 drinks in a week. 30 years ago is was normal for young males to drink 10+ drinks in one night out. Im not young anymore but i am pretty sure alcohol consumption is greatly diminished among young people now. For one thing, its a lot more epensive than it used to be. Not many can afford it anymore. And now with legalized cannabis being normal theres other options.
Cinisajoy2@reddit
I remember a party about 30 years ago now. Someone had decided to quit drinking and was getting teased. He came over to me and said you aren't drinking either but you aren't getting teased. I just walked him over to the drink table. Grabbed a red solo cup, poured his coke into it and said now no one will know you aren't drinking. No one teased him the rest of the night.
BAMspek@reddit
Yes. People in my town usually congregate at the breweries and bars.
FreeStateOfPortland@reddit
Really? In Portland the default would be a coffee shop
FreeStateOfPortland@reddit
Central? No. Present usually? Yes.
pete_blake@reddit
Used to be but not anymore
thedawntreader85@reddit
Not in my life, I mostly do gatherings with family and friends with kids so no one really drinks. I'll have something on occasion though.
WowsrsBowsrsTrousrs@reddit
Most of the social activities I engage in arw in places where alcohol isn't even allowed on the premises, although I do hace ance a month lunch with old friends at a pub and people will order a beer (one) with lunch. Drinkingvwould interfere with most of my otber activities.
Judgy-Introvert@reddit
Not really. We drink, but not often. Sometimes it’s there, sometimes it’s not. Don’t care either way.
sean8877@reddit
Stopped drinking myself but pretty much any social gathering I go to involves alcohol. Which sucks when you're trying to stay away from it, but you can hold a glass with soda and people will assume you are drinking some sort of mixed drink.
Main_Needleworker661@reddit
On my fiance's side of the family, yes. On my mom's side of the family, no. On my dad's side of the family, I guess a little bit.
It depends on the type of people you're with.
Bluemonogi@reddit
Not for me. My spouse and I don’t drink alcohol. Sometimes when we get together with friends they choose to drink wine or beer and we have non-alcoholic drinks instead.
Roboticpoultry@reddit
I grew up and still live in the Midwest. It’s not a family gathering, holiday or baptism without copious amounts of booze
eagles_jesse@reddit
Very much so for me. At least for my family and friends, and my neighborhood in Philadelphia. There will be people drinking beers/cocktails for even young children’s birthday parties lol.
spacefaceclosetomine@reddit
Yep, we drink at baby showers in my group. Mom does not, of course.
SpecificWorldly4826@reddit
In my life, I’d say it’s pretty much always present at social events. It’s a toss up as to whether I’ll actually drink any. I’ve never been made to feel weird about choosing not to drink. I rarely even get a follow up, “Why not?” Just, “Okay! What can I get you instead?”
infinite_five@reddit
No.
My friends occasionally bring stuff or drink their own if we go over to their place, or if we go out. But my husband and I don’t drink so we don’t tend to have anything in the house.
caseygwenstacy@reddit
I just came back from a party where I sat in fetal position crying the whole time. I’m home now and got drunk to numb that pain. Feels better to be sober with friends, drunk alone
bjbigplayer@reddit
No.
DrBlankslate@reddit
I won't go to parties where alcohol is any part of the gathering. I don't like how people behave when they're drunk.
Weird_Squirrel_8382@reddit
I wouldn't say a big part, but it's there.
hobokobo1028@reddit
Yes. It’s Wisconsin
Thrillhouse763@reddit
I moved here from MN a couple years ago. I went to a church block party in Lyndon Station (population maybe 300?) and they had the kegs flowing at 10am. That town also has like 6 bars.
robitj11@reddit
It depends on where you live. I live in the South in a part of the "Bible belt" and they pretend alcohol is the devil. However they also celebrate Nascar's origins in moonshine running. Private gatherings often have beer or wine, but not at fairs, social clubs. In my County, they can't have bars with hard liquor, only beers if they are breweries or if they sell food.
natigin@reddit
I married into a Wisconsin family…
Thrillhouse763@reddit
My father in law was late to his 10:30AM Busch Light this morning. Got side tracked on a couple projects so he cracked it open a little after 11AM.
Thrillhouse763@reddit
I live in Wisconsin BUT surprisingly the church family night I just went to did not have booze.
Asparagus9000@reddit
There's some there over half the time, but no one really notices or cares if there's not.
Remarkable_Table_279@reddit
No. Because my faith doesn’t allow alcohol…and neither does my work. And I hang out with family or coworkers (usually at lunch)…I’ve been to evening things where they served alcohol but I just get water or a sprite and no one cares. Tho 20 years ago they probably thought I wasn’t old enough to drink.
PlusPresentation680@reddit
Yeah I guess. I don’t drink though.
Roborana@reddit
No. My social circle is my family. There is never alcohol at our get togethers.
pkupku@reddit
No. I live in Wisconsin, the drunkest state in the nation by far, yet my social interactions rarely include alcohol.
Intelligent-Invite79@reddit
Not anymore thankfully, gave it up in 2017. Family gatherings? There’s usually alcohol somewhere.
DGlen@reddit
Yes.
shelwood46@reddit
Present, but I don't often partake. I was never much of a drinker (too broke, on duty, just didn't want to), and these days it mixes poorly with my medication. No one ever gave me a hard time about it, and there are always non-alcoholic options.
CommanderKrieger@reddit
No. The vast majority of my family is either alcohol free, will only drink a little during special occasions/events, or only drink in the privacy and comfort of their home. My parents, grandparents, my aunts and uncles, and a handful of cousins all fall under the first category, as in they don’t drink at all. Myself, my brother and his fiancé, and yet another handful of cousins fall into the second/third category just based on how we’re feeling about it at the time. But alcohol is never brought to our family gatherings, save for a wedding if they decide to allow it, and I’ve only ever been to one that did.
skipperoniandcheese@reddit
nah, weed is though
pinniped90@reddit
In my 50s now. Yes, alcohol is present/available, but drunkenness is not cool.
Business setting, it'll be a curated wine list and maybe an after dinner single malt.
Personal setting...I have a group of friends I drink whisk(e)y with and another group of guys who meet at a local brewpub. With my wife it's usually wine - either something from our collection or meeting friends out for wine.
Any given session might be 1-2 full drinks, 3 max. Wife is either a few tastes or 1 glass.
We're kind of lightweights these days.
ITrCool@reddit
Nah. I don't drink for religious reasons but also because of a promise I made to someone that I will never break to my grave.
But in my family and friends circles no one really drinks anyway. The two friends I have that do, tend to read the room and keep their alcohol consumption under self-control out of being polite but also because both have had DUIs in the past and definitely don't want to go down that road again.
ALoungerAtTheClubs@reddit
I quit drinking years ago, so it's not a part of social gatherings for me, although other people at some social events I attend may be drinking moderately.
Consistent_Damage885@reddit
Not at all. We don't drink and most of our friends don't or do so rarely.
Many_Inevitable_6803@reddit
Yes. With my friends & family, the first question is always “what do you want to drink?”
Cinisajoy2@reddit
Well I would ask you the same thing. Your choices are coffee (creamer, sweeteners and flavoring available), teas (again a variety of flavors and do you want it hot or cold), hot chocolate, ginger ale, milk or water. If I know your preferred soft drink, I would have it on hand.
Many_Inevitable_6803@reddit
Ahhh good point. But in my family it means wine, beer, or the house cocktail of the day
Cinisajoy2@reddit
I grew up in that family.
Nancy6651@reddit
Always, yes, though some have sworn off.
Designer-Travel4785@reddit
Not really. I'm about the only one in my friend group that drinks much. I'll have a couple of beer, but that's it. Most of us are firefighters, so we need to be sober to respond to emergencies.
YoshiandAims@reddit
It wholly depends. It's present at some, not at all at others.
baddspellar@reddit
I like to have a drink with friends. Emphasis on 'a'.
wieldymouse@reddit
No
holymacaroley@reddit
In my personal life? No. In quite a few people personal life? Yes.
I rarely drink, just not my thing and gets expensive if you hate beer. Most of my friends aren't big drinkers, either. They're night be some drinks, but people usually stick to 1 or 2 if any. Now back when I did improv comedy or the 3 years I played roller derby, a lot of the people around me drank like fish even though I didn't. Some of them are in recovery now, actually. They made a huge deal in high school of how much we would be peer pressured, but I never had peer pressure until those years of roller derby when I was in my mid 30s.
Birdywoman4@reddit
No after being married to an alcoholic and divorced I avoid those types of gatherings. Just got burned out on all of it and the financial pitfall too.
sammysbud@reddit
“meeting up for a drink” is the go-to social hangout option. Getting dinner too, but sometimes you just want to spend a few hours catching up without the pressure to clear the table for the servers. I have quite a few sober friends so it’s never a requirement to drink alcohol. Even though I drink, I’ll order an occasional mocktail if it looks good on the menu.
So personally, it’s always present but rarely the focal point.
SnooChipmunks2079@reddit
Virtually nonexistent. We got old.
SnowblindAlbino@reddit
Almost always, yes, and most people never have more than 1-2 drinks in my circles. When we go to a bar-- usually for trivia nights --the "big drinkers" among us will have two pints.
Additional-Software4@reddit
Yes, Los Angeles area here. Its expected to at least offer a beer to a guest.
Upstairs_Highlight25@reddit
It depends, it it is just a group of adults hanging out beer and wine are normally available but if we are actually doing a activity we normally don’t have alcohol as being buzzed or drunk would get in the way of participating in the game/event/sport.
pickledplumber@reddit
Zero
Lugbor@reddit
In my personal life? No. I don't drink, and I don't hang out with people who drink to excess. If someone needs to be intoxicated to have a good time, they need therapy, not alcohol.
elsandeth@reddit
With family, they all drink alcohol. With close friends, we all use weed instead.
RipleyCat80@reddit
Not at all, ever since recreational cannabis was legalized in my state we've basically abandoned alcohol. Friends parties will have a mix of people drinking and others outside smoking.
RhinoPillMan@reddit
Depends on the people. I’m an alcoholic and most of my friends drink, so yeah. But it’ll vary.
dangleicious13@reddit
Yes. I go to a friend's house probably at least every other weekend. We've never not had some kind of beer, liquor, or wine (usually beer).
01benjamin@reddit
Yes definitely
Libertas_@reddit
Yes, but only because I play beer league hockey with one of the teams that drink the most. I rarely drink but will have a soda or something with the team.
Popular-Local8354@reddit
Yes. Between law school and my family, it’s hard to have a gathering where someone doesn’t break out alcohol.
CupBeEmpty@reddit
Man… law school. It is wild what folks will get up to when ostensibly learning.
Popular-Local8354@reddit
If you ever need a lawyer, it’s important for you to know that he spent about three years drunker than he ever was in undergrad.
CupBeEmpty@reddit
It’s actually funny. I was older in law school so I didn’t go with all the younger kids to the bar and whatnot.
I was already a functional alcoholic by then. Still crushed law school though.
Popular-Local8354@reddit
What type of law do you do?
CupBeEmpty@reddit
Admin type of stuff. State agencies and some federal.
RandyArgonianButler@reddit
There’s at least beer at pretty much every social gathering. Cocktails are popular too, especially margaritas.
I don’t drink though.
Appropriate-Food1757@reddit
Yeah 💯
Adjective-Noun123456@reddit
The only social gatherings I have where you aren't guaranteed to have somebody drinking is when my coworkers and I go grab lunch. And even then there's a good chance someone is getting a beer.
If it's a half day or after work? We're all drinking.
With friends and family, there's always booze present as well.
hoecooking@reddit
Only with certain friends, most everyone else it’s almost never brought up
Several_Celebration@reddit
My family is primarily Polish, so yes. Every social gathering from kids birthdays, to holidays, to game nights, to popping in to say hello on a random weeknight involves a mandatory offer of beer or liquor from the host. If someone comes to my house and I don't notice their glass is empty and offer them more drinks, it's considered bad form.
Negative-Arachnid-65@reddit
Social gatherings very commonly offer alcohol but don't revolve around it - I rarely drink at them and no one looks twice. There are always non-alcoholic drink offerings as well, even at bars and restaurants and breweries (NA beer, wine, and cocktails have really taken off around here), and typically multiple sober or light-drinking adults.
CupBeEmpty@reddit
I don’t drink myself but alcohol is thoroughly ingrained in pretty much all of our social interactions. Parties, celebrations, mourning, dating, etc.
ABelleWriter@reddit
Yes, but not getting drunk. We're adults, we have a drink, maybe two.
Gold_Telephone_7192@reddit
Yes, the vast majorities of times I congregate with friends includes drinks of some kind.
musical_dragon_cat@reddit
Family events typically have wine, and when going out with friends, we typically visit a bar of some sort. When having friends over, though, alcohol's usually an afterthought. We certainly don't need alcohol to enjoy ourselves, but it's nice to let loose around company.
Quirky_Commission_56@reddit
I got all of my drinking alcohol days out of my system in high school. And I’m currently 50.
OneNerdyLesbian@reddit
For me, it doesn’t really at all. No one in my family really drinks often and we never have alcohol at get together (which is kind of ironic since most of my family is Catholic).
My friends are more varied in how much they drink, but these days, we generally hang out together in settings without any alcohol. That wasn’t always the case when I was younger.
BroCanWeGetLROTNOG@reddit
No, pretty much never with my friends
BigBearOnCampus@reddit
Not really. Me personally most of my friends are stoners like myself so normally we’re passing a joint/blunt or something. Maybe during a party but that’s not often
SippsMccree@reddit
Basically no, I don't drink and none of my friends do
Sinchanzo@reddit
No. Alcohol plays almost no role is my life.
Cinisajoy2@reddit
No role here.
Ok_Driver_6895@reddit
Same
Agent_Polyglot_17@reddit
Same
WrongJohnSilver@reddit
I used to work in the wine industry, so I've seen stats about how much alcohol adult Americans drink.
30% of Americans don't drink at all. Another 30% drink only occasionally. And on the other end, the top 10% of American drinkers support 60% of the market.
So it's really, really skewed.
Cinisajoy2@reddit
There are 350 million Americans. So alcohol at social gatherings varies. I have been to parties where alcohol was the main event and I have been to parties that alcohol would be inappropriate and everything in between.
Heck the first time I drank was at a cousin's 18th birthday party.(That was the legal drinking age then.) I was 10, but the cousin decided since she was old enough I was old enough. Funny thing my parents didn't realize I was drinking.
Sometimes it boils down to respect for others. Family reunions, no one drank alcohol out of respect for grandmother or Mama depending on the generation and the older relatives.
No. For a variety of reasons. I hosted several dinner parties over the years and no one noticed the lack of alcohol.
Purposely hosted an alcohol free anniversary party. Some guests didn't drink because of religious reasons, some didn't drink because of medical reasons and others didn't drink because of alcohol problems in the past. Also, because the known drinkers in that group either get handsy or mean when drinking and you never know which.
Anyway, there is one American's experience. Note I am in the Bible Belt so that might be a factor. Also if we were to have a family reunion, it would probably be drug and alcohol free because of the variety of non drinkers. I am sure someone would host an after party for those that want to indulge.
PacSan300@reddit
In my social circle, kind of. My wife and I often have some form of alcohol available when we are hosting get togethers with friends or family. For me personally, I cannot handle a large amount of alcohol without getting the “flush”, so my consumption is carefully moderated.
Mouse-Direct@reddit
No, I’m older (50s) and now other than a mimosa for brunch a few times a year or a margarita with enchiladas, I don’t drink much at all. The only exception is going on a cruise — I’ll typically have a cocktail a day and a glass of wine with dinner then. My husband will have a glass of red wine after dinner 3-4 times a week.
Goldfitz17@reddit
Used to be, not anymore at 28. My state legalised weed and I think mosy people, myself included have been making a switch.
anneofgraygardens@reddit
It's pretty much always there at social gatherings. I live in an area that produces a lot of wine and it's really common for people to have local hookups because their kid works at some winery's tasting room or their brother in law has a small winery, that kind of thing. Beer is also really common.
There isn't really a lot of pressure to drink but it's always on offer.
MadDocHolliday@reddit
It depends on the people in the social gathering. If it's my extended family, there's no alcohol. If it's a group of friends, a few people might have one drink, two at the most, but the majority won't have any.
funktion666@reddit
Depends on the people. 80% of my social gatherings revolve around binge drinking. But I have a couple alcohol-sober friends and we will smoke marijuana instead.
You can find whatever you want in the US. My group of friends, for whatever reasons, like to party and drink a lot.
CalmRip@reddit
I live in California. Wine is very much a part of most social gatherings, especially with food. It's very much associated with conversation, food, and general congeniality. It's not like it's the focus of gatherings, it's just part of what makes them pleasant.
bloopidupe@reddit
Yeaa
MuppetManiac@reddit
No. I drink maybe 4 times a year max. It isn’t a part of my day to day at all.
toomuchfreetime97@reddit
I mean I’m at a party right now and am drinking a margarita lol in my experience if adults are present there will probably be alcohol
GetInTheHole@reddit
Yes. But I’m in a highly non-child social circle that includes a large number of likewise child free gay couples.
MsAddams999@reddit
For a lot of people in the USA I would say it still is but not for me. I had alcoholic parents and grandparents and several half siblings who definitely had issues with chemical addiction. I don't want any part of that.
I used to go to Irish pubs for the music nights and to clubs to dance but even then I never drank and I didn't much like dealing with people who were drinking a lot.
HonestLemon25@reddit
I work as a first responder. My calls disproportionately have to do with alcohol and usually involve death or injury. I stay away from alcohol and don’t associate with anyone that doesn’t do the same.
Not that there’s anything inherently wrong with it, I just see no reason to be around it.
MrLongWalk@reddit
It depends on the gathering in question
TheRealDudeMitch@reddit
Absolutely.
nykiek@reddit
For me and my family (including extended family) no. However there is a large portion of the population where they drink all the time. And that can run the gamut from a glass of wine at dinner to binge drinking every weekend.
Outrageous-Pin-4664@reddit
Not at our family gatherings. Gatherings with friends usually have a little alcohol. We're too aged to do any serious drinking though.
So it's there, but it's not "big."
Arleare13@reddit
Yes, very common at social events. But it's not like every single person drinks or there's any pressure to. Not everybody drinks, and that's fine. But it's basically always an option for someone who wants to.
sighnwaves@reddit
Not anymore. Cannabis is far more prevalent with my friends.
Ms-Metal@reddit
It depends on the party, it depends on the time in my life. One time in my life I couldn't imagine partying without drinks, now I hardly ever drink. Not an alcoholic or anything, just grew up.
DummyThiccDude@reddit
While i personally dont drink that often, most family events i can think of usually has someone bringing alcohol.
Social functions really depend on what it is, who is putting it on, and where it is. Book club at a Mormon's house? That's probably non-alcoholic. Bingo at a Brewery? People are definitely drinking.
Traditional_Trust418@reddit
No, because most of my family and friends do not drink. I do occasionally and so does my best friend, but not very often. I typically only drink socially or during holidays and I'm sure my family would say that's too often
docmoonlight@reddit
I’m in San Francisco, and it’s pretty much ubiquitous I’d say. Lots of offices even have a bar or beer fridge where you can help yourself to a drink when it gets to be later in the afternoon. Happy hour is the standard social get together with friends after work, and any cultural thing you would go to (theatre, opera, ballet, museum, rock show, movie) will generally have a bar. Also, at least in my social group, if someone invites you over to their house for dinner, it’s assumed you’ll bring a bottle of wine as the guest (and they’ll probably offer you their own wine too). Maybe we all collectively have a problem, haha, but it’s a fun problem to have (until it’s not)!
LightAnubis@reddit
Yes. I personally don’t drink but a lot of social gatherings revolve around alcohol. It’s almost like it required
Sooner70@reddit
Depends on the crowd you run in. When I was in college, alcohol was an every weekend thing.
These days? I last had alcohol in a social setting as a celebration that the Covid lockdown had ended. Even then I only had two beers.
Great_Chipmunk4357@reddit
Pretty much.
EmploymentEmpty5871@reddit
Nope, not like it used to be when we were young and dumb.
Thick-Possession6073@reddit
It was a much bigger part of social gatherings in college, but now that I've graduated not really. There are exceptions like Holidays though. Beer for 4th of July and St.Patrick's day, Champagne at New Year's, etc
Maybeitsmeraving@reddit
I would say it's a frequently present minor part. When we get together for board game night, whoever hosts always has some beer for the group, not everyone drinks it. We do pub trivia together, but nobody is getting wasted. I've only been to one dry wedding, and that was for an employee of mine. No one in my family or friend group could I imagine holding a dry wedding. But we aren't on really big drinkers. If someone turns down a beer, nobody would ask why. Might wonder if they have an early morning or they're watching their weight or something, and not consider it past that.
anerdyhuman@reddit
No. I don't drink, most of my friends don't drink, and the only member of my family that really drank died a few years ago
river-running@reddit
I don't drink, so it plays no role in my life. For social gatherings in general, it's very common.
NecessaryPopular1@reddit
Alcohol doesn’t play a role in my life but my favorite vineyards do. Separating the substance from the environment, not chasing alcohol but drawn to the atmosphere it lives in — vineyards as landscape, pacing, light, silence, ritual. It’s not just about how they look, or the culture around them. It’s about how they taste when everything is done right. Cheers!🍷and Cheers! 🥂🍾
SouthernStyleGamer@reddit
None. I don't drink. My friends do, and my mom too much so, but I don't like the taste of alcohol.
Semirhage527@reddit
Social gatherings are typically at a place where alcohol can be purchased (like a restaurant) but it’s not a central part. If I threw a party at my home I’d have some on hand but no one would have more than 1-3 drinks, many wouldn’t have any at all.
Silly-Resist8306@reddit
Many of our friends don't drink at all. Those who do will have one or two beers or glasses of wine over the course of an evening. If there was no alcohol, no one would complain or leave.
tacobellgittcard@reddit
More often than not, yeah
PlanMagnet38@reddit
Yes, beer or wine are available at most gatherings with adults. I would find it extremely odd to attend a party that didn’t at least offer beer.
Responsible_Ask3976@reddit
Depends on the mood that day. If I need to be alert the next day, then no