What can I do with my day/weekend as a single person who’s feeling a little lonely?

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Joyanonymous@reddit

Volunteer!! PLEASE consider volunteering. There are so many amazing causes that desperately need volunteers. Some of them have very active social activities attached to them.

Gig Buddies is an excellent place to start - look them up and contact your local co ordinator.

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vulvaic@reddit

I had never heard of Gig Buddies but what a great idea!! Thank you for sharing

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They are the BEST ORGANISATION ❤️❤️❤️ please share their details with friends / family / colleagues! It’s not just gigs - you can buddy up with someone and do any kind of leisure activity together. It’s so rewarding 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

Oh wow, this really looks like something I’d be interested in. I’ll sign up, thank you x

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Joyanonymous@reddit

It’s honestly such a worthwhile charity 🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 an amazing thing to do with your time.

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yesterdaysomelette22@reddit

You sound like you’ve got loads going for you. You already have lots of interests and, presumably, experiences with them, to fall back on. Can you simply locate groups to take part in the things you already enjoy? I joined a running club- for motivation rather than friends- but have met lots of ppl there and there’s lots of socialising too.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I did used to go to a running club but stopped. And it was weeknights! It’s weekends I find the hardest. I might look into rejoining though

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Tuniar@reddit

Tried cycling? I think it’s more social than running. Theres tons of cycling clubs, should be able to find a nice social one

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DeirdreBarstool@reddit

What about a park run? I’m too lazy to go running but I know there are a few in my city that are on Sat mornings.

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yesterdaysomelette22@reddit

That’s great :) I guess I was just saying ‘follow your interests’ whatever they are - you sound like you’ve are well positioned to thrive to me

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chrisl182@reddit

Recently single after she cheated on me after 9 years, I'm in the same boat. I had kids, house and a wife so my routine and social life was just that. Now I'm out the house and have a lot for free time, I just don't know what to do with all of it.

Drinking solo in the pub has been my go to but that's a slippery slope

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HollyDolly_xxx@reddit

Recently on reddit ive seen alot of men only meet ups. they go for a walk and then go for a drink at a cafe place. Theres been so many positive things said about them in the comments! Im not a man so havent attended any of the events like that so have no clue how they actually are🤷🏼‍♀️but maybe something like that in your area might be worth checking out?

Ive also seen volunteers needed ads for 'fix it' type groups too. Could that be something you could get involved in? It would give you time off from thinking about what youre going through as youll be too busy focusing on what youre trying to fix and it would also give you a bit of a feel good boost knowing youve fixed something for someone and helped them out a bit? I am well aware of how shitty stereotypical i sound suggesting a fix it group to a man but im willing to sound like a tit making stereotype assumptions if it may help someone get a bit of a break from their own head and break the cycle of drinking by suggesting something thats a bit different to the usual volunteering options that get suggested. i hope you find something that helps to bring you a bit more happiness in life♥️x

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baburen@reddit

Workout at the gym. Get fit, you will sleep better and be more energised. Hope things improve!

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chrisl182@reddit

I have been to the gym once, it took a while to get the motivation to go but when I was there I enjoyed it. I was sitting on a free day pass for about three weeks, trying to egg myself on to get there. Pub was the easy choice so it always won.

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VMS_UK@reddit

Mate honestly I’d stop drinking and get in shape. It’s not easy out there and you’ll feel much better for it, if you enjoyed it at first then you aren’t doing it right though! Get yourself even a basic PT at pure or something to get going.

I had a surprisingly similar situation to yours (9 years, child, she cheated out of nowhere I thought) luckily over a decade of BJJ and the gym meant I didn’t take it lying down and had that to fall back on, take out anger and frustration and reevaluate what led to it happening in the first place. Me working all the time, hard as a business owner, not making enough time for her and generally being a prick sometimes when it came to considering her emotional wellbeing- not purposely but also I didn’t actively consider it sometimes. Don’t let her walk all over you with the kids either, you’re entitled to 50% custody, keep them overnight if you need to until arrangements have been agreed. My ex had to be forced into this she thought she could do whatever she wanted, despite us always saying we’d never use our child as a weapon.

Dating is fucking brutal too, I ended up deleting all the apps and just asked someone out from Costa who flirted in the drive thru haha. Shit will get better for you though mate, best thing that happened to me in the end.

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chrisl182@reddit

Thanks man those are some good words to hear. Keeping strong for the kids is a tough one but it's what I'm focusing on right now. They don't need to see me shouting at their mum or breaking down in tears so I'll be the best dad I can be while trying to work out who I am as a single man now

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xJam3zz07@reddit

Asking someone out in a Costa drive through is the level of confident I aspire to be, haha.

I'm in a similar situation, 8.5 years, got cheated on, house together but no child, it's been nearly 2 months now and I'm starting to slowly feel more like myself now.

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VMS_UK@reddit

Cant lie my heart was going mate haha it’d been a long time since I’d had that sort of situation and I prepared myself for her to say no. I thought about it a couple of times and eventually worked up the courage to do it which felt good. Nothing to lose at the end of the day, except your favourite drive thru aha. Thing is when it’s been 8/9 years and back then apps were only just starting really it’s hard to adjust to the new norm that some people are used to, decided just wasn’t for me lot of main characters on there, scammers and people wanting visas😅

Good on you brother you’ll get there, glad to hear you’re feeling a little better sbout it. It’ll obviously take a bit longer but without being too cliche these things happen for a reason, one door closes and all that. The things you can do now, possibilities are endless, use the opportunity to do what you’ve always wanted to do!

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wishmaide@reddit

There are social groups available, geared to an age group. Their activeness is variable but it might be worth a search of a local Round Table group (25-45) or the 41 group (45+, I believe)?

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doggirlmoonstar@reddit

Wrong sub. Go get therapy. Why on earth don’t you have custody of your kids. Single parents are more busy, not less. Get therapy.

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Cole-Palmer-phd@reddit

I feel like get therapy is such an American thing to say

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chrisl182@reddit

I am having therapy, thank you for your suggestion.

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No-Temperature-7195@reddit

Make friends

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Minimum-Laugh-8887@reddit

When I broke up with my partner I started doing indoor rock climbing and it was fabulous. I met lots and lots of new people who were all really nice and welcoming. Thoroughly recommend.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

That’s what I ended up doing with my day today. I boulder regularly so just went on my own. Home now though

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Minimum-Laugh-8887@reddit

See the only problem with bouldering is you can do it solo. Whereas the wall you have to have a partner. In my centre they have something called GPS guaranteed partner scheme so you go along and chat to a new person for the night, who then introduces you to other people, then you join there whatsapp group etc etc.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

That’s a great idea. I did speak to a lot of people but yes, pretty much climbed on my own!

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escapeshark@reddit

Go see a movie. I love going to the movies on my own to a late showing, especially horror movies.

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Lopsided_Snower@reddit

I doubt that’s appealing to most women mate, going to see a late showing of a horror film on their own. Not saying they don’t exist but I don’t think I know many who’d be keen

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Unlikely_Egg@reddit

I'm a woman and have done and would definitely do this 😁

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escapeshark@reddit

I am a woman myself 🤷🏽‍♀️ depends heavily where you are, but i did it when I lived in London

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Lopsided_Snower@reddit

Fair play, I would think you’re an outlier though, I know plenty of men who wouldn’t be up for this

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julzibobz@reddit

Don’t feel embarrassed or anything - I know so many people in their 20s and 30s in a similar situation! It’s also just a fact tbh that many people rely on their partners a lot for their social life, and it’s harder if you’re single because you have to constantly actively make plans (which you always have to do in advance! exhausting). I think it might help if you had more natural systems in your life that offered community. The hobbies you do sound great, but are all 1h type activities that you then leave again, and you’re left with all the in-between gaps so to say. I recommend looking closer to home: neighbourhood groups for example, or getting to know people on your street, so then you can just ‘pop over’ for a glass of wine or a coffee, or you have a chat to them in the street. That can act as a safety net for when other things fall through as its low barrier. An interesting movement to create more community is called Fractal, it started in NYC but now there are groups all over (maybe see if they have one in your city?). It’s basically like creating a village but in a city. I am not affiliated with them or anything, just found it a cool project: https://fractalnyc.com/

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newbornunicorn25@reddit

Join a volunteer group, a local meet-up group or a weekly group class! This is such a good way to get to know people if you’re shy approaching new people as you have a common topic to discuss.

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MazerTanksYou@reddit

My life turned around in 1997 when I volunteered for the first time.

Pick something you're enthusiastic about. Find a local group. It's social, it's good for the soul and you'll learn new skills and aspects about yourself.

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Eyupmeduck1989@reddit

100%

I’m volunteering at a local farm that does various programmes and it’s been amazing for meeting people, learning new skills and giving back to the community. Cannot recommend it enough!

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acitysparkles@reddit

I second this! Grew up volunteering, moved to London and started volunteering to spend some free time, met so many incredible people and it's so rewarding.

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un32134e4@reddit

what did you pick

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MazerTanksYou@reddit

I was recently unemployed, 20 years old with no direction. I joined the Princes (Now King's) Trust Volunteers.

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Marvel--Jesus@reddit

A big jigsaw puzzle whilst listening to your favorite music.

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tinyarmyoverlord@reddit

What city 👀 I was thinking about being a sad weirdo too as a man also cancelled on me this weekend. Would be neat if it were the same city.

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EnthusiasmPatient733@reddit

Do you mind me asking where you find guys to go on a date with? As a guy I feel like dating apps are impossible at the best of times.

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tinyarmyoverlord@reddit

Well I have a permanent man and I met him at work many years ago. He’s a shit head and I can do better. I attempted a dating app once to see what’s out there, absolutely no thank you to anything on a dating app. So with my shitty man I stay 🤷‍♀️

I suppose if I were single I would actively look for other humans already in my hobby. I certainly wouldn’t look on an app ever again, it’s just not me.

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EnthusiasmPatient733@reddit

Hit the nail on the head, definitely far from authentic from what I've experienced.

You make a good point though, maybe my interests are too male orientated and I need to find some new hobbies. Thanks for the advice.

Good luck, I hope you manage to sort that shit head out, or find someone better 👍

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I also feel like my hobbies are too male orientated and maybe this is why I’m single 🤣

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EnthusiasmPatient733@reddit

You'd think that would make it easier 😂

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wishmaide@reddit

Have a search if there's a local Ladies Circle group to you, it's a social group geared to 25-45 females. Activeness of the groups can be a bit variable, but its worth a look and the activities involved can be a good mix.

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Bifanarama@reddit

Go swimming? Followed by an obligatory hot chocolate, natch.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I do swim actually, it’s just yet another solo activity 🥲

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Schmicarus@reddit

In a similar sitch, male, single, moved to new part of the country, it's nice having activities and all, some of them are social but finding someone to spend time with is a seemingly unreachable goal

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ribenarockstar@reddit

Oh I sympathise so much - and sometimes being out by yourself just feels like you’re surrounded by groups and pairs of people, which rubs it in more. No advice here but hugs.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

Thank you! It is hard when you’re alone a lot of the time

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ribenarockstar@reddit

I often feel it the most when I’ve been out with couple friends, and they all go home in their pairs and I go home by myself to my empty flat. It’s crap, isn’t it?

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running_like_water@reddit

I feel the same way feel free to message me!

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AllThatIHaveDone@reddit

Join a swimming group and it doesn't have to be.

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sausagemouse@reddit

Get pissed

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Budget_Dot694@reddit

Go to a gig or creative social activity like sip & paint

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Saito09@reddit

Ive started just going to coffee shops on my own and reading or sketching for a couple of hours.

Still alone but being surrounded by chatter helps lift my spirits.

Plus ive become friendly with the staff, and every now and then have a pleasant conversations with strangers.

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TSC-99@reddit

Join a running club

Volunteer at races and parkrun

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DeirdreBarstool@reddit

I was very similar when I first moved to the city I live in now. I joined a couple of MeetUp groups. Some were better than others… some had lots of people (men!) who were clearly there hoping to pull. But one I joined was for people who liked going to gigs and alternative music. Some people drink. Others don’t. There are lots of gigs of course, but also pub quizzes and meals out. It’s much smaller than the more ‘normal’ meet ups but all the better for it and I’ve met some great people. Obviously to become actual friends you need to attend stuff fairly regularly. Sometimes I sign up to things last minute if I’m at a loose end and fancy going out.

Another thing I did if I was at a loose end was go to the big Waterstones and find a cool new book then go read it in a local cafe or pub. Although it doesn’t help with meeting people, I felt a lot better just getting out of the house and it lifted my mood.

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DeirdreBarstool@reddit

Aye, getting downvoted for giving advice on stuff that actually works, based on my experience as a similarly aged woman, of exactly what the OP is going through, classic Reddit. Let’s all suggest fucking bouldering and Magic the Gathering shall we?

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ermCaz@reddit

Let's start a farm together on Stardew Valley

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sammiahoy@reddit

Can I join… 🥹

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honestlyVERYhonest@reddit

Raised hand here. Miss that "shall we do ome more day?" "Ok" at 5am feeling.

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ermCaz@reddit

If you're on Steam, inbox me and I'll send my friend code

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ermCaz@reddit

If you're on Steam, inbox me and I'll send my friend code

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lavender_cookie_@reddit

HECK YEA 🤭🤭

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ermCaz@reddit

If you're on Steam, inbox me and I'll send my friend code

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letsgetevil66@reddit

Go to gigs / concerts ! You’d be surprised how many people go to concerts alone and it’s a great place to meet people and make friends . You won’t feel out of place being alone so many people do the same x

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Existing_Physics_888@reddit

Cinema, bring a blanket, get the good snacks!

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secondincomm@reddit

You go to the gym, do they offer any classes? I go to a few classes a week and find its great for a little social boost of being part of something with like minded people

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AutomaticInitiative@reddit

I go to the cinema sometimes if I can't sit at home by myself. Ours has a little food place attached and shuts at 11 so could spend the whole evening there.

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Crimsonmonk@reddit

“I’m fairly sociable but shy approaching new people. I do drink but don’t want to go and get drunk by myself.”

I’m very similar to you, and I’ve been feeling the same recently. I’ve taken to going out, having one drink, then forcing myself to chat to people who are by themselves. If they seem receptive, GREAT, friend for a bit. Otherwise, move on and try again with someone else.

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bevster70@reddit

I've got a similiar problem and saw an advert the other day for a website called "empty chairs" they have groups all over the place and have arranged nights where a group meets in a pub and have a couple of empty chairs at the table for people to join (the organisers wear orange tops so you can easily find them apparently) it sounds a good way of meeting people, not sure I have the confidence for that at the minute but I have been thinking about joining a local walking group as simehow walking and talking feels less daunting.

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Euphoric_Forever_325@reddit

I think finding a hobby is always great. You just need something to occupy your time with that you genuinely enjoy.

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Kufiya_25@reddit

How about hobbies like knitting etc ?

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I can crochet but I have adhd and find it hard to maintain for a long time. And it’s still quite lonely. I do have some knitting needles and wool somewhere though. Maybe need to dig them out

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Kufiya_25@reddit

Maybe find some local knitting group? There are plenty of them around

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Independent-Middle22@reddit

You need a social hobby. I joined a dance class

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I think you’re right! My hobbies are all very enjoyable but very solo ones

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Independent-Middle22@reddit

I used to be the same and kinda stumbled on dancing only to realise it was of my own making haha. You'll do great, just pick a social one and stick with the same group for a few months :)

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I really am terrible at dancing, I don’t have much rhythm 🤣

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Independent-Middle22@reddit

In my experience, rhythm comes in the 8th month of dancing hahaha. But there's other social things to do! The key is to be consistent and go to the same thing for enough times that organically you're part of the group, that takes a bit of time

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Mjukplister@reddit

I like to have a busy physical day (exercise , gardening , DIY) and then come evening I’m knackered . That said I remember the feeling when your 30 and it feels like everyone’s happy . We have been there and looked back . But being blown out sucks and not suprises you feel Blue tbh

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Lost-Positive6610@reddit

anyone here tried to get a TV service and enjoy the weekend , if yes any suggest please !!!

thanks in advance

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stepsmcgee@reddit

Walk up a mountain! Get out in nature, embrace how much of the world you can see on your own.

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Revolutionary_West56@reddit

let me start by saying I’ve been there girl, you’re definitely not the only one with this problem !

I listen to a Saturday night radio show in the bath. Sound weird but radio makes me feel less lonely, knowing it’s live and loads of other people are doing the same thing as me

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flimfloms@reddit

Parkrun!

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jesuistimide47@reddit

Volunteering is amazing - look at Olio, you can rescue food and share with neighbours, helps build that sense of community (and you can do as little or as much as you want!)

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Rogue-Daddio-3@reddit

As a woman it shouldnt be too hard to find companionship even if you aren't that attractive. Men on the other hand struggle wayyy more.

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ExpendedMagnox@reddit

Don't put her down for struggling by saying someone else is worse off.

I know your heart is in the right place but we're here to bring people up, not put them down.

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Rogue-Daddio-3@reddit

Im giving her facts of reality.

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DeirdreBarstool@reddit

What you’re giving is strong misogyny/incel vibes. The kind of ‘companionship’ women can find adhoc is NOT the type of companionship most of us are seeking, i.e. desperate men looking for a shag.

Nothing worse than someone struggling and the person coming along to minimise it and say OH I/others have it SO much worse.

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Rogue-Daddio-3@reddit

Companionship doesnt just mean a shag... typical of your type to always claim misogyny and use terms like incel. People are too soft these days

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GwdihwFach@reddit

Not true, but ok.

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Rogue-Daddio-3@reddit

How is it not true

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partywithanf@reddit

Not the time for that conversation.

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Puzzleheaded-Web1519@reddit

Do you join in the classes at your gym. I would think that you would make friends with common interests by taking that route. Hope you make new friends soon.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I do occasionally but not often to be fair. The ones I go to I usually go with friends 🥲

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sammiahoy@reddit

If you’re near Glasgow I’m also 30’s F who enjoys going to the gym and looking for a hiking or weight lifting buddy! Or even just someone to grab a coffee with!

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

Not near Glasgow but I would if I was close!

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Clear_Lie_6668@reddit

It sounds like you are already doing the right things but in slightly the wrong way. Most of the activities you are doing solo can be helpful in expanding your social circle if you get involved in groups. When I moved to a new area I joined a CrossFit gym. The group training made it so much easier to start conversations and get involved in other activities. We had a gym WhatsApp where people would regularly ask if anyone was interested in a hike or a run or a dog walk or a coffee or a pint. Some members started their own run club. From this I expanded my social circle and tried some activities I likely wouldn’t have just by saying yes to a message on WhatsApp . Have a look for similar group activity involving the interests you already have. I am also a little awkward when meeting new people and when I first joined the new gym on my first visit a lovely lady came over and said “hi, are you new? Come and meet my boyfriend “ I’m actually going with my girlfriend to that ladies house for dinner tonight. Because of this, I have payed that act of kindness forward countless times and walked up to a new face and said “new here? Come and meet everyone. “ So join that club. There might just be a smiling stranger waiting for you to walk in.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

Thank you. I really appreciate you taking the time to say this.

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LetsAdultTogether@reddit

Check out the MEETUP app. There will be lots around you to choose from hopefully

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Crazy_Concern_9748@reddit

Join a book club? Volunteer somewhere?

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SerendipitousCrow@reddit

I'm similar to op. In a book club but it's only one evening a month

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ImmediatePiano6690@reddit

Jesus the questions on this sub, how on earth did some of you make it past being teenagers 😂.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

It might seem cringe or strange to you but I moved to the city with my ex, most of my friends are work colleagues and are older / have families etc. So I don’t have a huge social circle here, and my hobbies are generally solo hobbies anyway.

Feeling a bit down in the dumps so thought I’d ask to see what other people get up to on lonely weekends.

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BulldenChoppahYus@reddit

The gym doesn’t have to be lonely. I joined a gym in 2017 that accidentally created a brand new circle of friendships I was not counting on - some of them turned out to be keepers for life. I don’t go to that gym anymore and the circle has moved on somewhat but it was brilliant for my social life

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Inevitable-Debt4312@reddit

Definitely get outside. I don’t, enough, but I always feel better afterwards.

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Elslobboh@reddit

If you're into outdoor activities, maybe join an athletics club. Try out a few different events and see if there's one you really like.

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Born-Needleworker298@reddit

Have they got a sofar sounds in your city? Can go those on your own and it’s an easy place to meet people…

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I’ve not heard of it but I’ll look into it

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earlyeveningsunset@reddit

Go and see a movie. It doesn't feel lonely because everyone is just sitting in the dark silently. I used to go fairly often when I was single and child-free!

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koalateacow@reddit

I have kids and I'm always down for a pal to come round on a Saturday night for a few drinks! I dont get the chance to go out really so its nice when my friends take the time to see if I'm free / ask to pop round. So I say text them! Worse they can do is say they are not up for it!

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Kindly-Analysis-9491@reddit

Have you tried the Meetup app? I find it helpful for finding social activities to do on days where I don't want to be home alone.

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OK_Cake05@reddit

Find a hobby/interest group

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el_lemur_93@reddit

Sorry you're feeling a bit sad at the moment. I'm in a really similar situation to you and also shy so you're not the only one in their 30s on their own! I've really learnt to enjoy being alone and not sure I could go back to really having someone permanently in my life again! Being alone means you get to do what you want whenever you want, there's no compromise. However so I still have some sort of social life I've done the following:

Joined the local stage society and do things with them.

I'm just about to start playing a new sport in a team setting.

Go to the local women's walking group walks at the weekends.

Could you take up a new hobby/club that involves other people? I swim as well, and that can be a little social if you spend time in the sauna/steam room afterwards or find a proper club.

I do sometimes see family and friends at the weekend as well and like to put some days out in the calendar with them as something to look forward to. So for the next few weeks I've got a solo trip to the city planned, a visit to the local National Trust type place for a historical themed weekend, a trip to the zoo, family party and dinner out with a mate. I also find other things to look forward to so I can't wait for Eurovision in May and I'm going to make a buffet of different European foods. I also find watching familiar tv shows helps, things like Friends, Gilmore Girls or Scrubs are nice because the characters are the same the whole way through.

I've also got a cat who keeps me company and makes sure I get up in the morning etc! When my old cat died I was pretty aimless and lost before I got my current boy. They give you something to plan your life around, he's honestly the most important person in my life. Maybe a dog given that you like the outdoors would help provide you company and a bit more purpose?

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leswhinin@reddit

Jiu jitsu! Gets your fitness and is perfect for encouraging communication and bonding with others

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yxhbinovtxezrfibin@reddit

If you're already pretty fit how about something like CrossFit? It has a really nice community vibe and it's easy to get talking to people. I joined a crossfit type gym a few months ago because I work from home and it's been great for getting me out and talking to people. I love going to the gym but it can be quite solitary.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

It is actually something I was thinking about but just don’t think I’m strong enough! I’m active but not very strong and I think I would feel self conscious

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EntrepreneurAway419@reddit

Everyone starts somewhere, hyrox might be a better fit, they're all cults but gym cults are good. Meetup and Bumble also good places, you can go along to a group meet and leave if you need to

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ci_newman@reddit

Bumble for Friends, or MeetUp and look for a local event you can join.

Climbing gyms are usually very social, especially for women on their own.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I do climb, I went on Thursday though and have some massive callouses which is why I haven’t been today. I might strap up and go though

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ci_newman@reddit

Even better if you already know what you're doing. Strike up a conversation with a fellow climber on any particular routes you're tackling. For the future, I bet your gym has a social club to use for finding someone else to climb with too.

I attended my gym for 10 years before realising there was a social club behind the scenes...

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

Ok you’ve inspired me. I’m going to get ready and head down 💪 x

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Ancient-Thought5492@reddit

Ah I'm so glad you're going out climbing! I met one of my best gals at the climbing gym 💪

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reader270@reddit

What about parkrun for a Saturday morning? You can make it as sociable as you like. Chose your pace, or volunteer as a marshal or tail walker to cheer people.

Join a local group for a hobby or interest. I’m in a choir and it’s been great for asthma and feeling like I’m part of something. We do a few concerts a year too.

Are you able to get a pet? When I got my own place I was living alone and immediately got a pet cat (then was adopted by a pair of stray brother cats). Pets are great company and always cheer me up. I’ve even got visiting foxes in the garden who I chat to and leave out water for.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I usually do parkrun but I don’t talk to anyone there 🤣

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yxhbinovtxezrfibin@reddit

Volunteering at park run is much more social!

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reader270@reddit

It definitely is! Handing out finish tokens is nice, telling everyone ‘well done’, or marshalling the course giving people a cheer. I like to volunteer on the extra Christmas Day and New Year’s Day parkruns.

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SheilaCool@reddit

Get a dog!! Awesome companionship and a great talking point with lovely dog people.

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Exxtraa@reddit

I’m quite lucky I have mountain biking as that gets me out on the weekends and takes up most the day.

Perhaps see if there’s any local hiking groups on meetup or fb nearby. There’s loads atm. I dip in and out depending on if I fancy a social hike or not.

Not much left of the day itself today but maybe treat yourself to some retail therapy online or spring clean the house. Throw out some old clothes or list them on vinted.

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iamsheena@reddit

Meetup is great for finding something to do without having to know people. Hikes, game nights, crochet/knit groups, film nights, etc. I'd recommend giving it a peruse.

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arenaross@reddit

Go and watch a film.

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EatingCoooolo@reddit

Why don’t you join a running club? Or start a Saturday Park run or start a quiz night at your local pub?

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roxieh@reddit

You're not a saddo!

Does your living situation allow you to get a pet? Honestly the companionship of an animal if you live alone is second to none. In those quiet moments where you doubt yourself they are pretty much always there to need you, accept fuss from you, snuggle with you. It can be really fulfilling. Obviously not the same as human companionship but it's something.

Beyond that, I often find the loneliness feeling hits hardest when I'm feeling insecure about something (my worth, value, interestingness, etc). Those are actually the times I try to really hone in on what I can do for myself - good book, favourite drink, for you maybe going out and finding a new place to run.

It sounds like on the whole you do have a good social life. So for the quiet moments just spend a bit of time giving back to yourself. Sorry if the advice sounds generic, but it's the best I go. I also reach out to friends or a close family member if I really need a little connection.

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redgoose6@reddit

Seconding how much a pet can help - I WFH 24/7 & am autistic so a bit of a loner myself, and the companionship and entertainment my pooch brings has been wonderful for my wellbeing

Also, such a good way to casually meet people! I’m in a relationship but if I wasn’t, I’m sure her nosiness to make friends would have helped me get a few dates. And the new renters bill comes in on the 1st of May which makes it easier for those in rentals to have pets!

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docju@reddit

If you run do you do parkrun? Appreciate to the outsider it might look a bit cult-y but you could run it or volunteer, the latter of which is more conducive to getting to know people. There’s also junior parkrun as well.

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IntergalacticCows@reddit

I came to the comments to say parkrun! Whether you’re running or volunteering, it’s a great way to chat to people and get out on a Saturday morning. It’s also definitely a cult, but a really fun one.

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MetalMul15ha@reddit

Do you have a bouldering or climbing gym near you? They sometimes put on social nights. Or just going and chatting to people is how I found a bunch of my friends and a previous boyfriend! (It was an amicable breakup)

Or if you have any local walking groups?

There's also a site called Outdoor Duo for meeting new dates and also new friends. 😁❤️

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Sexy_Worm@reddit

Not a saddo at all!!! I think there are a lot of people in similar situations, it can be really hard these days.

Not sure if its your sort of thing, or in your budget. But iv seen adverts for solo holidays, a bunch of solo people all go together and mingle.

Are there any running or hiking groups in your area? Check social media for groups. There is a group on fb for single hikers, not always to meet a partner but some are looking for friends ect.

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zeusoid@reddit

Sometimes being comfortable soloing things is not a bad thing.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I am usually quite good at finding things to do alone but I’m struggling with it this weekend. I do agree with you.

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zeusoid@reddit

Get a good book and a nice glass of wine and relax.

I find sometimes there’s also trap of expecting your weekends to always be full and on the go.

You’ve got to step back and just chill.

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NobDeRiro@reddit

I’m sort of in the same boat and tend to do most things solo (or with my dog), but maybe the cinema? I’ve found if you go on your own it doesn’t matter too much as you’re all in silence anyway. Kills a couple of hours too

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idris_elbows@reddit

I feel very similar OP. Similar age. I join classes for stuff I want to learn/do (e.g. dance) and even if there's no social after I can survive off the buzz for a few hours

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notthebees43@reddit

Hiking or running clubs definitely have a great sense of community and people who join are usually also looking to socialise and make new connections. Worth looking into whether there’s any near you?

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MondriansRuler@reddit

I used to do lots solo and actually ended up having to do group stuff as I play chess. Boardgames clubs another idea. Sounds like you have many interests!

Sorry what happened to you fir tonight though.

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Snaggl3t00t4@reddit

Book club? Gig?

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Fine_Analyst_4408@reddit

Would a dog be a good fit in your life for companionship and sharing your outdoor activities?

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sunlitupland5@reddit

Running clubs are generally very social

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ImmediatePiano6690@reddit

Ummm watch porn....

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Suspicious_Banana255@reddit

Can you join a club or hobby group, knitting, crafts, book club, walking group, or an evening class in something that interests you.

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coffeewalnut08@reddit

Been in this situation many times. I usually research and then go to a place to visit for the weekend. It can be a town, village or city I’ve never seen before. It could also be a nature spot, particularly in a national park or by the coastline.

I’m also particularly drawn to places that have interesting museums, parks, architecture or monuments. Plenty of that in the UK.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I am actually going away on Monday for 4 days to do just this!

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leslieknope1993@reddit

Geocaching? Which is walking/hiking and finding "treasure" r/geocaching

Learn a new boardgame? I play on Board Game Arena r/boardgamearena; there might be a boardgame cafe near you

Scout some guerilla gardening patches? r/GuerrillaGardening r/RewildingUK

I would say my creative hobbies take precedence over my physical ones, so I've run out of "active" suggestions that don't involve joining a team sport...

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No_Height_2408@reddit

I would join groups for those activities. Kayaking, running, singing, whatever really, art class. always meet interesting people and feel less isolated. p.s. you're not a saddo, we all have these periods!

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lucylastic89@reddit

I’m the same as you, it feels like everyone in the world is paired up doing stuff. Last weekend I went to a nearby town on the bus with my dog and a book and just had a couple of pints and watched the world go by and I had a great afternoon.

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BenDavolls@reddit

People watch over a couple of coffees with a book?

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Unlucky_Fan_6079@reddit

Don't let that twit who cancelled have power over you. How about a running club or something else like rowing ? And then there are courses you can do in the evening or at weekends which is a nice way to meet people, if you're creative ? I felt like this in my early thirties as a singleton but honestly I just used to spend time with my friends who had familes and sort of try and fit in with that.

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Wishmaster891@reddit

Tyson Fury is fighting on netflix later

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omgu8mynewt@reddit

If your in a city, find the social event website of your city and see if there are any hobby groups that seem appealing?

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Able_Arm_7201@reddit

Find someone to not be lonely... Humans were designed for community, loneliness =depression. And I don't mean a romantic someone. Friend, hobby group, anything so long you are interacting with humans. It keeps you sane and develops you in ways you cannot even Comprehend yet.

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pancreaticallybroke@reddit

Lego!

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SeaComb5808@reddit

Honestly, treat it like a solo date, pick one thing you actually enjoy (nice café, sunset walk, live event) and own it instead of waiting on someone else. Funny how the moment you stop trying to fill the silence, it starts feeling like freedom instead of loneliness.

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Academic-Tadpole7975@reddit (OP)

I really do try this most of the time (and usually quite successful) but I’m struggling to think of what actually to do with my day today!

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