Yup! We were at our parent’s friend’s house, they had a huge piece of land and we were out exploring with their kids who were several years older than us (I couldn’t have been more than 6 cuz the memory is super vague) but we all found a frozen porno mag. I remember their kids and my older brother being super excited about it and I was just grossed out.

Now I can’t even remember who that family was and I’m not sure how to ask my parents lol

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justanameanyname@reddit

I believe the nudie-mag fairy is the same person as or closely related to the Tooth-Fairy and Santa Claus.

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humptydumpty369@reddit

Found a VHS in a slightly wooded area off the side of the word while walking the dog. Brought it home only to discover it was wild stuff. The dude had two penises, one was fake, but the implication was it was real. Wild how that stuff burns into the mind.

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Shine-Shot@reddit

Wow. Hahaha yep! Woods

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msb96b@reddit

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

Well done, you.

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P_Nis_@reddit

I was ten, which is about the worst possible age to find something you’re not supposed to understand yet.

The shed had always been there-leaning a little, sun-faded, the door sticking so you had to lift it just right to open it. It wasn’t officially off-limits, but it felt like it should be. Which, of course, made it impossible to ignore.

One slow, cicada-loud summer afternoon, curiosity finally won.

The door scraped as I pulled it open-way louder than it had any right to be. I froze, waiting for someone to yell.

Nothing.

So I stepped inside.

It smelled like hot wood and dust, and sunlight pushed through the gaps in the boards in thin, bright lines, catching everything floating in the air. For a second, it just felt like any other forgotten place-tools, junk, old bags of clothing that should have been donated years ago, nothing special.

Then I saw the crate.

And even before I opened it, I knew I’d found something.

Inside was a stack of glossy magazines that absolutely did not belong in a dusty shed. I picked one up, half expecting… something. A reaction. Consequences. Instant understanding.

I opened it.

And my brain just kind of… stalled.

It wasn’t that I understood what I was looking at-it was that I knew I wasn’t supposed to be looking at it. It felt like I’d skipped ahead to a part of life I didn’t have the instructions for yet.

I flipped a couple pages, heart pounding for no clear reason, before the feeling hit me-like I’d crossed a line I didn’t know existed until I stepped over it.

So I did the only thing a ten-year-old can do in that situation.

I put everything back exactly how I found it… except definitely not exactly, because I had no idea how it was when I found it, closed the crate, and got out of there like the place had turned on me.

After that, the shed wasn’t just a shed anymore. It was a place with a secret. A special place. A place I would visit MANY times.

And somehow, talking to people my age years later, you realize—it wasn’t just your shed.

Different woods. Different alleys. Different dumpsters.

I did ecological fieldwork in the early 2000's and found several forest sex toys.

Or those weird little niche a5 sized ones where the back 1/4 were full of sent in pictures of spouses & personals ads lol

We found a whole plastic bag of them in the park once with all sorts of bdsm, crossdressing, wife swapping, weird racist ones, one where it was just old dudes getting tied up elaborately and stomped on by old ladies who were naked except for those shiny plastic thigh high boots and really big hair.

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Chernabog801@reddit

Wooded area. I lived in student housing as a kid in Ann Arbor. There was a decent sized wooded area that felt like the woods to a 5 year old.

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Obi_Wan_Benobi@reddit

Woods here too. In a faded Folgers can starting to rust.

Then one day my friend stole some of his dad’s nudie mags.

We stored them in an empty Folgers can I found and my house and…

Stashed it in the woods.

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f33@reddit

Ah yes I can still remember the smell when you popped the top of that cooler in the summer sun

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bamalama@reddit

Porn mags were treasured. The magazines we found, were ditched by someone who threw them out a car window along a wooded road.

Then we, the Keepers of the Porn, would get a plastic bag and store them somewhere safe, like a treehouse, fort, cave or other safe space.

Others would add to the stash. The stash was respected by the community and would be passed down to future generations. So a single stash of porn accounts for mutant memories of finding porn in the woods.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

The tree fort was the place for forest porn. It only makes sense lol. Also, user name made me snort laugh.

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Strange-Still-5145@reddit

forest porn 😆

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PMmeHappyStraponPics@reddit

I mean, I didn't find any of that kind of porn out in the woods (not even sure they made it back then).

Took me until after college to figure out what I liked

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YNWA_in_Red_Sox@reddit

We had a bamboo fort out by the ditch bank. Standard box of porn showed up one day.

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Delta1225@reddit

I found a penthouse magazine in the locker room at the city pool. That was an awesome summer for 12 year old me in the 90s.

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Redlady0227@reddit

Oh we ran across that on the regular when I was coming up. It was basically because all the kids in my childhood neighborhood (which was surrounded by substantial forests on 3 sides plus a river) stole their parents nudie mags and hid them in the woods for others to utilize.

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Roklam@reddit

Yup!

Even talked to my parents about it.

There was a playground near my house that I went to all the time and there was a wooded area with a little creek between the fields and a large garden center.

I found in the most stereotypical fashion a stack of magazines in a paperback under the leaves. They were slightly damp but in decent condition. So I returned with a plastic bag that I could seal up and keep them dry.

Happened to me more than once, but I grew up in a trailer park so I guess its kind of expected.

For me it was ditch porn.

Me and a friend discovered a brown sack with around 15 nudie mags in it one afternoon.

A few weeks later we found another 2 magazines just lying in the sun in the same spot.

For years, whenever we'd check that location we'd find some.

willworkforwatches@reddit

We found a stash inside one of those plastic boxes they dig into a lawn for the water meter.

So bizarre.

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jackfaire@reddit

Porn never. There was a patch of woods behind the 7-11 where teens would go drink though and I'd use their empties to redeem at the 7-11 for money and then spend 30 minutes in the candy aisle picking out stuff.

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InvertedInsideWinger@reddit

Yup. Absolutely - core memory.

Not the woods, but an overgrown front yard next to our middle school bus stop. PlayGirls and other "majority wieners" -fare.

One of the kids on our bus had lived there with his mom, and I'm guessing they were evicted, and that was just part of the trash that was thrown to the curb. Just a big open cardboard box of oily muscle and dicks. 80s style with luscious mullets and neon mesh g-strings.

I'm pretty sure a few of the bus stop fights we witnessed were from that kid fighting back over the brutal bullying that occurred over his mom's collection.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

I’m guessing you’re a lady by the name, apologies if not, but I can’t imagine that was super cool to see as a young girl. Girls clamoring to look at wang doesn’t seem feasible.

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Wendy-Windbag@reddit

We were in eighth grade and old enough to giggle and move on.

Oddly, we had gotten our curiosity out of the way back in sixth grade, when my best friend's mom accidentally gave us a couple issues of PlayGirl. Her mom's friends had thrown a raunchy surprise 40th over-the-hill birthday party for her, and she had been too naive to know that those magazines were like full nudity and left them out.

She should have known better, because BFF's dad had a huge stash of PlayBoy, Penthouse, and Hustler that we had definitely peeked at over the years ("Why does she look surprised to show us her butthole?") But dudes were new to us, so of course the moment my friend told me, we were making after school plans to look at dongs.

It was mostly disgust and laughing, and then confusion because why were all these personal massagers in the ads shaped like page 42's thingy?

When her mom realized a couple days later, she was absolutely appalled and in tears when she asked for us to not say anything about the magazines, or she'd go to jail.

I mean now, that sounds like some huge red flags and would be infuriating to any parent, but it was obviously sincere and really didn't harm us in anyway. We were curious middle-schoolers was all, and our curiosity was staunched.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

Yeah, that’s not something Xennials would NOT rip on somebody for.

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aka_mrcam@reddit

Found half of one in the woods on the side of the road. It was torn in half from side to side.

gif

That’s the “did you ever run across some wanna be witchcraft or devil worship shit in the woods” experience.

Not in the woods since I grew up in a fairly large city, but a number of other places. Best haul was in 6th grade, Walking through the alley behind behind our house, one of my neighbors had tossed a fairly substantial collection of Playboy, Hustler, Penthouse and more into his recycling bin. Me, my stepbrother and a few friends filled our backpacks to the brim. Had mine for at least a year or 2 before they just disappeared from my room one day, I assume my mom or stepdad found them, but they never mentioned it.

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hangryvegan@reddit

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Lol. I forgot that Playgirl existed.

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hangryvegan@reddit

Me and my best friend got kicked out of the Waldenbooks in the (good) mall for trying to see behind the plastic cover on a Playgirl in ‘89.

Damn, there are so many extinct things in that sentence.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

Didja head over to the Circuit City instead?

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thrwaway856642@reddit

I never found nudie mags, but I would occasionally stumble upon a liquor drop off point in the woods. There was a whole black market of adults purchasing booze for underage teens. Their drip point was in the woods. I remember finding my first one when I was 7 years old and bringing the booze home. My parents were terribly confused.

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WheelLeast1873@reddit

We found the cover from a vhs tape in the woods.

Plane_Jacket_7251@reddit

Oh yeah, few different times. They were always under something and obviously meant to be somewhat protected from the weather. But we found a few sracks over the years as middle schoolers (11-13 year olds). It was an unwritten rule though. Flip through them, but leave them where you found them. We also found bags of them.for some reason in a grocery cart behind a store in town. The was weird.

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Rashaen@reddit

Yup. The one that sticks in my memory was in a hollow at the base of a tree with a bunch of pocket and belt knives. Left the porn, but you can bet those knives made it into my collection.

Found out later on that one of the adults in the neighborhood worked at Schrade and had a crapload of samples and prototypes. I dunno if I messed up his fetish, or if one of the neighborhood kids bought/stole those knives, but mysteries are the spice of life, I guess.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

We grew up in wild times.

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Dphre@reddit

Yes and i lived on the b edge of town literally. Road behind my house was the city limits. Not many homes but some patches of trees.

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FancyGent@reddit

I sure did.

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pncoecomm@reddit

Not the woods but where I'm from, its normal for condos to have a playground floor between 1st floor and entrance. This floor is used as common area for kids that live in the building to play etc...

My Nudie Magazine Day never came.

_Moregone@reddit

Found some in a trash can cutting through a construction site when everyone was gone.

Also found some in the rocks of the those huge rock jetty where large yachts and small commercial boats harbor.

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emergency_salad_fox@reddit

Jealous_Scale@reddit

I was the opposite - when I was 15 I had a friend who had a live in family member "getting suspicious" that he had porn magazines, so I had to help him dump his collection in the woods between the local supermarket, the sports field for a nearby school, and his housing estate. So much we had to do it in 2 trips.

padbaird@reddit

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thisbroadreadsbooks@reddit

I found some a few different places as a kid.

Under the overpass in the ditch we were forbidden to play in but did anyway.

In a wooded area where we found a shack made from branches and a tarp. Someone had been living in it but not for a while since it was all falling apart and old. But there were a couple magazines in there.

In a drainage tunnel near the train tracks.

I did. My friend pretended to sniff it and said “I smell tuna.” I didn’t know what he meant.

DiaDeLosMuebles@reddit

Yep. And they always had a distinct smell of rain soaked porn.

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TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

It’s a distinct smell. Core memories.

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MNJayW@reddit

I found some in the woods and left some too. Whoever found it got a decent stash.

TragicHedgehog@reddit (OP)

Life altering!

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