Person with shoes on train seat opposite you. Would you say anything?
Posted by alasuna@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 67 comments
I was riding on Thameslink the other day, and a child, probably about 10-12 years old, was sitting on the seat facing me in a squatting position, with the soles of his shoes on the seat the whole time. It really bothered me. And his mother was sitting right next to him and did not say anything.
I mean, you do sometimes see people stretch their legs out and rest their shoes on the seat in front of them, which is already bad enough. But in that case only part of the shoe usually touches the seat. Here, he was squatting on it, so the entire soles of his shoes were on the seat.
So, I found this quite disgusting, and it made me think about the next person who was gonna sit there without knowing this.
I really wanted to say something, that he was making the seat dirty. But I was afraid they might get angry or react badly, so in the end I stayed quiet.
What would you have done? Would you have said something?
Willeth@reddit
I don't think I would even notice to be honest.
You're in public, it's not gonna be clean.
alasuna@reddit (OP)
Yes, but the idea is to not intentionally make public spaces dirty unnecessarily. I don't walk around throwing garbage everywhere because public spaces are dirty anyway.
Willeth@reddit
That isn't the same thing, and I think if you took a second look you'd see it's a stretch.
Lopsided_Snower@reddit
What is wrong with you, there absolutely is an expectation that a fabric topped seat you’ve paid to sit on, is reasonably clean as to not soil your clean clothes when you sit on it. Give your head a wobble
Willeth@reddit
Yep! You're responding to something I haven't said.
Opposite_Radio9388@reddit
That's a pretty slippery slope. If someone was rubbing shit on a seat you probably wouldn't think "ah, public transport, what can you do?"
Willeth@reddit
I probably wouldn't sit on a slippery slope, that sounds like trouble waiting to happen.
Lopsided_Snower@reddit
It’s this sort of attitude that’s got the country so fucked
cursed_cucumbers@reddit
Hmm I struggle with this. Have people suddenly stopped washing their hands after going to a public toilet? No. This has always been a thing which hygienic people hate. Uncleanliness and poor hygiene are not a new thing, some people are just disgusting
heyitsed2@reddit
Ehhhhhhhhh... Is it though?
cactusdan94@reddit
The soles of that kids shoes are probobly one of the cleaner things those seats have dealt with lmao
ukbot-nicolabot@reddit
OP marked this as the best answer, given by /u/MrReadilyUnready.
^(What is this?)
StatisticianUsual471@reddit
No and I certainly wouldn't make a reddit post about it
MrReadilyUnready@reddit
If you don't speak out nothing will ever change.
CunningOctopus@reddit
Agreed. Most of these replies are depressing
alasuna@reddit (OP)
Yes, very true. I'll remind myself of that and speak out next time.
No_Chemist2922@reddit
In UK people mostly mind their own business and are generally not confrontational.
If it bothers you that much you could mention it politely, but usually the fact that they're doing something like that goes to show that they do not really care anyway, and hence it would be futile to raise the issue with them.
Opposite_Radio9388@reddit
I feel like this holds for an adult, but the person in question here was a kid. Kids should be taught how to be good citizens.
Eukonidor_Of_Arisia@reddit
Fragile, aren't we?
shartingmaster@reddit
Unless I needed the seat I probably wouldn’t say anything. But when the bus is busy I choose people who have their bags on a seat and ask them to move it instead of sitting beside someone who graciously left the seat open, because I’m not a monster.
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
Tbh that just seems like making a point for the sake of making a point. Comes off as petty.
shartingmaster@reddit
I think it’s incredibly rude to sit your bag on the seat next to you on busy public transport. I very much am trying to make a point and I am being petty. Why should a conscientious person have to sit next to someone when a rude person has purposely held up a seat they haven’t paid for.
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
Because some people like to have personal space. Especially on the bus when there's barely any legroom to begin with. Who are you to judge someone for that? You can't be rude at the same time as moaning about others being rude. Who are you to judge
shartingmaster@reddit
Get a car then, or pay for two seats. You’ll get zero sympathy from me because I don’t care.
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
Pay for two seats. 😂 That isn't how buses and trains work you fucking thicko. As for getting a car, again, what if somebody is unable to drive because of medical reasons or a disability? Or can't afford to because of the cost?
shartingmaster@reddit
Yes, obviously? You can’t pay for two seats like you can’t tell someone you want both of them. Like I said, zero sympathy. Keep your bag at your feet as the world doesn’t revolve around you.
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
Let me guess, you're the type of person to let your dog off the lead in a restaurant and tell people they should just have to put up with it?
shartingmaster@reddit
I’m more of a cat person
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
Ah, so you're a crazy cat lady. That checks out honestly.
shartingmaster@reddit
Love the smell of misogyny on a Thursday evening
TonaldJDrumpf@reddit
If you give off a certain vibe then don't be surprised if people notice it.
shartingmaster@reddit
I have a loving partner and 0 pets but I will be asking you to move your bag off the chair tomorrow morning expeditiously so be prepared!
Lopsided_Snower@reddit
I’ve been so close to doing things like this on trains recently
Starlinkukbeta@reddit
Say what you want to say. Expect them to say what they want to say. Either it’s positive, or it’s confrontational. Personally I say what I want to say; in this case the parent is lazy and uncaring. Or just doesn’t notice or care. You on the other hand do care -and do notice - do your thing.
SoggyWotsits@reddit
Exactly. People are free to say what they want, but they shouldn’t expect a good reaction to it. If they want to say their piece, they should be prepared to stand by it or back it up!
FreeBogwoppits@reddit
I do. I'm big on "oi mate, that's fucken disgusting".
futurama37@reddit
Public transport is dirty. You know the saying, what you don't know, can't hurt you. Maybe thst kid squatted on your seat before you sat down, but you don't know either way. The person who parks their a*s on his seat will, I am sure, survive.
jonathing@reddit
I wouldn't say anything but apparently I don't need too, I'm told that I have one of those faces.
I get it that public transport seats are a nest of pestilence that would put grandfather Nurgle to shame but putting your feet on them is just rude and disrespectful.
ComfortableJeans@reddit
Honestly, maybe its just having grown up in a really poor area, but it's never bothered me, because I've never considered that the seats would be any cleaner than the floor.
TanyaLola@reddit
Let me guess.... she was on her phone instead of engaging with him? I wouldn't say anything. She could be psychotic and get really aggressive, you never know! I would avoid the seats that face each other as they tend to have more feet on seats than the others, among other reasons!
msully89@reddit
I wouldn't say anything because it wouldn't bother me.
If someone does something that really bothers though, I will usually say something otherwise if I don't I'll be stewing about it for the rest of the day.
Independent-Egg-9496@reddit
No I don’t think I would have said anything. It’s odd that the mother didn’t say anything, it’s usually good manners to keep your feet off seats and tables in general. I would not assume anything though - they could have sensory issues / autistic traits that make them feel as though the need to do this for comfort in public spaces - unlikely, but better to keep an open mind than get yourself bothered by it.
SoulInTheCrowd@reddit
I'm with you on that. If someone decides to spend their whole journey squatting on a seat, instead of sitting, there is probably a reason for that. If it was just to provoke or misbehave, this lad would most likely get bored (and uncomfortable!) after awhile. Could be due to medical or sensory issues.
Sleepyllama23@reddit
I would be annoyed by it but I wouldn’t say anything. I can’t think of how I would say it without the mum being angry with me and I hate confrontation. It’s not worth the aggro.
SgtBukkakeMan@reddit
It's not my train, I don't care.
Lopsided_Snower@reddit
It’s when you’re wearing cream chinos and it’s been raining, that you might care
cursed_cucumbers@reddit
People who wear cream chinos think they're above trains anyway
iffyClyro@reddit
When I was younger I called out that kind of thing all the time, these days, I might depending on the circumstances but most of the time I simply can’t be bothered with the potential conformation.
If was more sinister, creepy guy annoying a girl or someone being abusive or something to someone that clearly wouldn’t be able to stick up for themselves I’d step in.
I’ve stepped in a few times on public transport.
Also had strangers step in on my behalf.
ChelseaMourning@reddit
I feel like the soles of a kid’s shoes are probably on the milder end of disgusting things those seats have seen.
SKRYVAKRAS@reddit
Situational but in any case make sure your tone of voice isn’t accusatory but rather worded more like a suggestion. We’re British after all ;)
jaBroniest@reddit
Lifes stressful enough. It doesn't directly affect you, it could cause drama and for what? A dirty ass train seat that's never going to change. It's situational. If it happened to be a church pew then absolutely, show some respect! But the shitty train? Nah man. F that.
unalivexmastree@reddit
No I wouldn’t. Those seats are covered in piss, poo, urine, blood and other bodily excretions. It’s public transport. However shoes on seats is awful so I understand where you are coming from.
Boboshady@reddit
If you're sitting on a public transport seat with the expectation that it's even remotely clean, you're doing it wrong.
Do I like it? Absolutely not. Would I say anything? Also, absolutely not. If nothing else, there's a high chance that the parent will give you abuse rather than anything else, it's simply not worth it for anything less than the kid actively touching your own stuff. Even then, I'd think long and hard about if I can just move my stuff.
DockingEngaged@reddit
Are they muddy? No? Keep your comments to yourself. Not your circus, not your monkeys.
Mammoth_logfarm@reddit
Not my circus, not my monkeys.
You were probably sitting on far worse.
The only time I'd say something is if rhey were stretching out across the gap into the seat next to me. And that would eb a personal space thing rather than a dirty shoe one.
MyBeardSaysHi@reddit
Every single time. Usually, if it's in range, I'll point to the "please keep your feet off the seats" sign and ask them if they've seen it.
Alternative_Good7358@reddit
dont know how people will react these days. id say nothing,i dont care enough about it to say anything.
Zaxa7@reddit
That was shit parenting and the adults who do it are dickheads too. Saying something may help them be more conscious of it in future but may also invite aggro. Same for dickheads who play their music on speaker. Switch seats if you can, the rest of the trip will be better.
shazhazel@reddit
Accept that some people are low class and will never understand basic things
Prestigious-Salt-245@reddit
That's an offence of soiling the railway, and the child above the age of criminal responsibility. You could have summoned an authorised person to require the perpetrator to desist or be forcibly removed from the railway.
llamasncheese@reddit
Dont say anything. Its worth the potential confrontation. Plus, bus and train seats have those god awful patterns because they get extremely dirty, the patterns make it harder to see how dirty they really are. With the amount of people that use the seats, all sorts happens. Shoes is the least of your worries.
PurchaseDry9350@reddit
No I wouldn't, don't want to be a busybody about that
VolcanicBear@reddit
Nah. I don't do it, but it doesn't really bother me.
People have been farting into all the seats all day.
Mickleborough@reddit
My rule is that if that were a scary person, and I’d still say something to them, then I would. However, it’s probably not an argument one can win,
koalabear20@reddit
No I wouldn’t say anything?? When im sitting on public transport im aware that its disgusting lol
BarbiePeonies@reddit
I would say nothing knowing fully well that people have thrown up and pissed on those seats.
A dirty sole is the least of my concerns
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