ULPT REQUEST: How do I indirectly make my upstairs neighbor's life hell

Posted by Rich-Fee-5826@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 41 comments

I woke up to my upstairs neighbor loudly beating his dog and I've had it. He's been our upstairs neighbor for two decades and has beaten his girlfriend(s) multiple times, caused our ceiling to cave in from constant leaks, and seems to have so many animals for some reason that he neglects. It's disgusting.

We've tried talking to him and calling the police among other things but it's impossible to do anything ourselves considering he has a ring camera and has like for locks on his fucking door. I have no fucking clue how to fuck with this guy or make his life harder than it has to be. i'm sick of it.

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OddProgrammer1150@reddit

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lesbiancanuck@reddit

piss disk in the air exchange vent

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Shot-Tap-4512@reddit

Dog piss if you can manage it!

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SpecialNeedsDetectiv@reddit

Yeah, dont implicate the poor dog. God knows it is already suffering enough.

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WesTxStoner425@reddit

No, he's already beating his dog, it could escalate.

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SpecialNeedsDetectiv@reddit

Oh my god, it would take all i have not to beat the pulp out of that guy since he beats defenseless animals and women.

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RikkiLostMyNumber@reddit

If he is mistreating animals, call the ASPCA. They know how to get the attention of the police.

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OilPure5808@reddit

This. I called the local humane society and asked for a welfare check on a couple of dogs I heard being hurt (don't know if he was kicking or beating). Within 2 weeks, I saw a huge amount of garage bags at the curb and he was gone.

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Puceeffoc@reddit

Bass system attached to your ceiling. Play 420 hrtz music at 3am. The closer to his bedroom the better.

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Odd_Alps_7468@reddit

Hi, pardon the fascinated bass player over here, but does that mean playing music that has the A below middle C on a piano tuned down to 420hz, which in modern times is normally tuned to 440hz, and the Victorian era standard for it was 432hz? So just super flat and dull sounding?

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Puceeffoc@reddit

I really wish I knew half of what you said. I'm not a music guy.

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Roonwogsamduff@reddit

half is pretty good mate

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sorrynotsorry922@reddit

Play the brown note like on South Park?

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avindictiveprinter@reddit

Make a post on 4chan about it. With coordinates. They love that shit.

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Key-Candle8141@reddit

Thats OPs coordinates as well what could possibly go wrong 😄

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avindictiveprinter@reddit

Okay, apartment number. :b

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kaleidoK11@reddit

Still... They said it's their upstairs neighbor. Not hard to find OP after an apartment number.

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avindictiveprinter@reddit

Could call that the consequences of NYPA.

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Witty_Candle_3448@reddit

Call the police, or Animal Control. Call the fire department because you smell gas coming from his door, then have a friend remove the dog.

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s4burf@reddit

Start eating only Indian food?

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s4burf@reddit

Please remove me from this sub. It’s stoopid.

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UnethicalLifeProTips-ModTeam@reddit

Your comment was removed for violating rule 14: No reason to be a dick. Seriously, get therapy or fuck off.

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spodinielri0@reddit

record him beating the dog and play it for your friends at animal care and control.

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Prior_Region_3989@reddit

Pour milk in his car vents ìn front of the windshield.

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typical_mistakes@reddit

Hate to say it, but everything you can write here without getting banned immediately would at best qualify as a half measure. People like this communicate primarily with violence, and understand little else. You have few options with people like this, and your best option is avoiding them entirely. The other options involve somehow removing their capacity to commit violence, but this promises considerable legal risk and could easily put you in mortal danger if you screw it up.

If you're someone with the stomach for such work, then you already know it (and have little use for my input).

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nah2daysun@reddit

This, and the more you anger him, the more likely he is to lash out, both at you and the dog, unless you get the dog removed from the situation.

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GoodMilk_GoneBad@reddit

So true. I just got a warning from reddit.

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Huge-Music3989@reddit

Start boiling cabbage.

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Paevatar@reddit

Drill a small hole through your ceiling and his floor. Spray something horrible through it whenever you feel the need.

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JBWalker1@reddit

If they have the same home layout it should be easy to know where a hole won't be visible too. Like under the kitchen cupboards is a good one.

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Odd_Alps_7468@reddit

They do exist! In addition to having a silly name, there's an automotive product made by sea foam called deep creep (lol) its a standard size spray can like the original wd40, and it has the same diameter straw like wd except it's close to 3x the length of the can's height, curved into a couple switchbacks an cling wrapped to the can's height. Probably about two feet once you straighten it out. It's designed so you can snake it in between the intake boot and the throttle body, start it up and blast all the crud off your throttle plate and clean out the rest of the carbon deposits in your intake manifold/cylinders/etc. fun stuff!

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Tasty-Adhesiveness66@reddit

fox urine, deer scent and liquid ass/fart mixed together. should do the trick I heard

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GoodMilk_GoneBad@reddit

STEAL THE DOG.

I would be knocking on that guy's door with a baseball bat if I heard him abusing his dog or girlfriend. He's bound to kill one or both.

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jensteroni@reddit

Steal the dog.

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Heybulldoug23@reddit

Put some marbles on the stairs. Ooops

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simikoi@reddit

Are you going out of town anytime soon? Get a smoke detector and put an almost dead battery in it, let it chirp while you're gone.

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JoinedReddit@reddit

Record it. Play it louder 30min. before he gets home. You have no dog. It will sort out.

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figgypie@reddit

Does he have a car? Can you fuck with that? Classics like removing valve stems, spray smelly stuff in his air vents, etc. Or if he has expired tags, call the cops when he's driving, like say you saw his car weaving like a drunk driver. I believe you can call anonymously.

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