A question about flying back to the US
Posted by Zforaname@reddit | expats | View on Reddit | 31 comments
Within the span of 24 hours I learned that I lost a (young) cousin on one side of the family and that an uncle on the other was put on hospice. Enough reasons for me to make a trip back home to spend time with family. However, I am terrified that going back home right now during the current political shit storm would be a stupid idea. More specifically, Trump's threat of "killing a whole civilization" tonight, and what effects those threats or whatever actions he plans might have.
I am so worried about being stuck there if flights are grounded, or something else happening. I am so torn right now. Is anyone else in a similar situation? I would be flying into Boston to avoid the drama of ICE in Newark (I am a US citizen with a very Mexican name).
I think I am just looking for a reality check and some sound reasoning outside of all the current family emotions.
Many thanks for any and all input!
dmada88@reddit
All I can say is I was half a world away from my mother when she died because of the start of Covid, and I regret not just taking the chance to this day.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Damn.... no words, friend. I am so, so sorry. I know a huge part of me would regret it if I didn't go...
3DGuy4ever@reddit
Is this post real?
And, how can we help given you haven't stated where you currently are and want to return to.
So, id say, you are here for drama
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Oh fuck all the way off and learn to read on the way out.
Formal-Door3464@reddit
oh this is heartbreaking. I'm so, so sorry to hear this.
dmada88@reddit
Thanks. I guess my point is there are often situations where there is no right answer and you simply have to trust your gut and live with the consequences. Obviously things can go horribly wrong whether you turn right or turn left at the intersection. You simply have to try to make your best choice at the time. I did. But it was hard and remains so!
Isaandog@reddit
Trust your gut OP. Stay away right now. Your loved ones will understand.
catminimum@reddit
i’ve flown a few times during this conflict back to the us for similar family reasons, it’s really fine. make sure you choose a route that avoids the middle east, but traveling to/landing in the us isn’t any different than it normally is.
bsg_80@reddit
I…worry about you. Such a hard call. But I think your concerns are valid. If it were me, I’d probably choose not to go considering your name/ethnicity. And I’m so sorry to even say that. I just have zero trust in the government. No should have any trust in them. But if you take the chance, I pray for your safety, easy return to where you now live, and plenty of healing for you and your family. Best wishes and be safe.
sunrise90@reddit
I don’t think anyone can know what’s going to happen. I personally am not planning to be physically separated from my child and husband for the foreseeable future just in case anything happens. I think weigh whether it would be worth it in exchange for possibly getting stuck for a while. I don’t think flights will be grounded forever so worst case you’d have to wait a bit perhaps? I empathize. It’s all insanity. We are planning a permanent move back to Europe this summer and I’m not convinced we have enough time.
georgegasstove@reddit
I feel you! Planning to exit this summer and worried about time. We are living in some frightening times.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Thank you so much for your reply. There's a lot of other things to consider, like having enough medication with me if I am caught there. Its such a big mess. I'd be leaving my partner behind here because they are not a US citizen and we don't want to risk them traveling with me.
I hope you and your family can make it out. I've lived in the NL for the past 15 years and find it incredibly hard to hear what my family back home has had to deal with. Moving here wasn't politically motivated at the time,, but I am sure as hell happy I did it when I did. Best of luck!
sunrise90@reddit
I hear you! We were in Ireland for a few years and felt safe enough to have a child -- returned during the Biden years to be closer to family thinking "surely not again". Lols. Idiots.
Next stop Ireland and never going back.
mutantninja001@reddit
Most likely you will get there fine. Just don’t make any stopovers in the Middle East.
Normal_Occasion_8280@reddit
"The sky is falling run and tell the king."
theytookallthecash@reddit
Chances are you will probably be fine but there's definitely a non-zero chance that something might go wrong. I'm not an expat yet, we're leaving in August. I worry every day about being able to get out. If I were you, I would not chance it.
Bigfoot-Germany@reddit
just calm down. don't oberthink. and visit your family. and take everything as it comes.
kulukster@reddit
I'm sorry for your family's situation. As someone who has been in similar situations many times, only you can decide. But your safety needs to come first. That's all I can say.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Thank you so much.
This is definitely the worst part of being an Expat. In the past, Ive been able to get home and help out with relatives on hospice, but after Trump started going after immigrants and detaining just about anyone without a US passport, I haven't been home. My partner isn't a US citizen and has other things about them that would make them vulnerable to being detained. So, we have just avoided it. If my partner isn't welcome, I don't want to go. Only a death or close to death scenario would have (and has) changed my mind. Hence the current dillema. I think the answer is becoming more clear. Its been hard to think straight with everything going on.
Artichoke-Rhinoceros@reddit
If you have your passport and it doesn’t expire soon, you should be ok. Make sure you have someone meeting you at the airport and text them with updates about where you are, so if you get snatched, they can make a stink with law enforcement that you’re a U.S. citizen being kidnapped. It also helps to have the number of a lawyer who can immediately file with the court to get you released if you are kidnapped.
The people in the most danger are the ones who are alone in the world, because they’re taken and no one knows it’s happened until they’re flown to Texas or the Sudan.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Luckily, I have a cousin who doesn't live far from Boston that wants to pick me up and drive down with me to the rest of the family. Thats the only reason I considered flying there instead of my usual spots. And I would make sure the rest of my family had my flight details. Id rather be a bit paranoid and over prepared than finding myself in a sticky situation.
Unhappy_Performer538@reddit
I would not fly in right now. It’s just not a sure thing that everything would be fine. There was an American citizen of Indian heritage (before some maga comes for me she was brown but born in America and a full citizen!!) who was detained unlawfully for “suspicious travel history” after taking a long vacation in several European countries.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Thats absolutely horrifying. I hope she is ok! I hear about a lof of american POCs being detained. And even white people who are just traveling there.
A friend of mine's sister (who is from the UK) went over there to volunteer at an animal sanctuary while she visited. Well, apparently thats considered entering without a proper work visa, even though it was volunteering and she had no intentionof staying in the US long term. She got pulled off to the side, questioned, and then sent on the next flight home.
Formal-Door3464@reddit
I'm not sure if this will help*, although when I was semi-regularly whipping miracles out of my derriere, before things like this, I'd set three intentions:
...and then I'd let it go.
This would look like, for you, you might like freedom or safety. For the flight/anyone you meet, you might like peace. For the team (you + the people you encounter while traveling), you might like ease. And then you let it go!
TO BE SUPER CAPS LOCK CLEAR: Trusting your instincts, using logic, and the normal answers very much matter. But, if it helps to have a little metaphysics backpocket trick handy, this tends to deliver ace experiences. (It's basically like a three-pronged way to signal to the universe that you come in peace, ergo, it should let you glide through experiences like a greased wheel.)
photogcapture@reddit
ICE is in ALL the airports. With a Latino name, and if your skin is at all melanated, (ie not fully white), I would avoid coming here at all costs even if you are a US citizen. They are taking and not asking later. Try to set up video chats instead. I am so sorry!!! 😞
tzgq2m@reddit
I think your considerations are completely justified. You can run back into the burning building, but in this case, you can't actually save anyone. I would not do it personally.
Boring-Parfait-2624@reddit
No need to be torn. You have a lot happening in your family right now and I think you should prioritize that over these fearful “what if” thoughts. I wouldn’t be surprised if nothing happens tonight or if it did. Don’t let a politician’s threats affect your life to this extent that you miss being with family at a time like this. He threatens a lot and then does nothing. But even if he does you don’t know that it will affect flights out of the US.
As for having a Mexican name, so do a lot of people on the US and they’re fine.
You’ll be ok. Come over and be with your family.
With love from the US.
Primary-Angle4008@reddit
A few weeks ago my husband was in a similar position just going from UK to India and most flights go via the Middle East but he went, 3 weeks ago and just returning today via a different route still via Middle East but no layover there, one flight extremely delayed so missed his connection but got rebooked by the airline and just landed 20 min ago There is always a risk and I’d avoid any flight that has layovers in the gulf countries but any other routes should be relatively safe and fine
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
Good to know! Thanks.
LaMaisonRealEstate@reddit
Honestly, if you need to go, I wouldn’t let fear of a worst case political scenario stop you. Flights can always face delays, but there’s no sign right now of broad travel shutdowns tied to the current situation, and Logan International Airport is operating normally aside from ordinary delays and occasional disruptions. As a United States citizen, flying into Boston should be straightforward. If being with family matters right now, I’d focus on that, keep an eye on airline alerts, and book flexible tickets if possible.
Zforaname@reddit (OP)
I am so glad a friend told me about the Boston option. I usually fly right into Philly or Newark. He said Boston has aways felt safer, as he beamed with New England pride.