Anyone else perpetually floating around feeling like they’ve “faked it till they made it”?

[-]

Ok-Energy5358@reddit

Along the way I realized that…I don’t mean this disparagingly to others or to be self inflated…but most people aren’t great at their job and even at just making responsible life decisions. Others are good at the specific thing they do, but enjoy their blinders and don’t want grieve deviate from that thing. Great! Companies need people like that to function. For whatever reason, I don’t suck at those things, nor am I happy just doing the one thing, therefore I run the companies.

Most people desperately want to follow the lead of someone. If you’re willing to step up, speak the idea, own the process, and follow through while everyone complains to you about it, then you too can be the boss.

[-]

drtyhppi@reddit

And you don't necessarily have to be the boss... Just be the boss at what you do.

[-]

Ok-Energy5358@reddit

Absolutely. I didn’t mean for the take away to be that you need to be the boss. I just kept finding myself in that role at the few companies I’ve worked for due to the reasons above. The people that I’ve come across that are always actively seeking to be the boss….yeah, never my first choice for people to hang out with.

[-]

drtyhppi@reddit

No, what you said really resonated. Most people are on autopilot and some you wonder how the hell they make it through the day and then there's the people that just have a knack for taking shit on. Could be running companies, could be leading a group within a company or it could just be a dude in his basement crushing a project no one else wants to manage.

[-]

Ok-Energy5358@reddit

Exactly. Spot on

[-]

sleepy_unicorn40@reddit

I've been doing my current job for almost 10 years and I'm in policy all the time. I still have no idea what I'm doing but I not only pull my own weight but I bring up my department in statistics. Not sure how, but if it means I'll be getting that raise, I'm here for it.

[-]

Jenaaaaaay@reddit

I still feel young and stupid. I’m concerned when work people want to do my idea.

[-]

scottyv99@reddit

Yeah. Andi never did. Spent 5 years in the navy, 5 years in the can and here I am… half a wise guy.

[-]

Rivas-al-Yehuda@reddit

I faked it... but I never made it.

[-]

anhydrousslim@reddit

I live my life as though it’s all going to fall apart at any moment. There’s a whole family depending on me and they have no idea.

[-]

cheeker_sutherland@reddit

Same and I wish I didn’t. Also have employees and their families depending on me so that adds to the mess.

[-]

sweetassassin@reddit

In a former life I used to joke with my VP that did she know she has a a 6th grader over seeing $30mm of the company sales?

Imposter syndrome is real.

[-]

SweetCosmicPope@reddit

I live my life a quarter mile at a time...

[-]

drainbamage1011@reddit

I mentioned this to my wife yesterday...she's been dealing with ongoing medical issues so I've been handling both our responsibilities (other than her job). I feel like all day every day I'm doing this constant shell game of various duties and trying to keep everything moving. If one thing changes, I've got to rearrange 3 other things in my schedule to keep up with it all. It's exhausting.

[-]

FoppyRETURNS@reddit

This is me right here right now

[-]

Fngrbngr79@reddit

Damn. That hit its target

[-]

theladyshady@reddit

I feel the exact same way.

[-]

psilosophist@reddit

Impostor syndrome's quite a thing.

[-]

Bad-Moon-Rising@reddit

I've been at my company for going on 13 years. I very rarely go one day without a colleague asking me for help with something. I can usually answer their question before they finish answering them and even if I dont know the exact answer, I can point them in the right direction. I speak on our conference calls weekly, I travel to other locations to help, I have hired and trained dozens new employees. I am a mentor to other newer employees with my same job title. I've had excellent visits with several members of upper management. And yet I still wonder why the heck they are letting me do this job and I struggle to push the "I'm going to be fired." thoughts out of my head.

[-]

Taanistat@reddit

I had the same feeling for 14 years straight at my last job. I left willingly just for a change because there was no way for me to move up. I spent 6 weeks training my replacement. Several of my former coworkers have reached out in the 14 months since I left just to tell me how badly things have been going since my departure. I thought they'd figure things out pretty quickly. I made sure I answered the phone when they called with questions. After about 4 months the questions stopped coming. I figured things were OK. Then former customers started reaching out, asking for help and advice.

As it turns out, I was pretty necessary. Don't sell yourself short.

[-]

jtriomino@reddit

I left a place that I did a lot of software training for, in addition to my regular non IT job. People calling me for questions went on for about a year until I finally said: I don't work there anymore...

[-]

Fappy_as_a_Clam@reddit

And yet I still wonder why the heck they are letting me do this job and I struggle to push the "I'm going to be fired." thoughts out of my head.

Dude. This is me everyday lol

Same situation too, I've been doing my role in some capacity for 10 years, 15 if I count closely related experience. I've worked with my current boss for 6 of them.

I'm convinced I'm a hair away from being fired, every day.

[-]

odin_the_wiggler@reddit

What's really great is when you interview at a job, you get the job, and leaving the interview you have the thought:

"Wow, I can't believe they fell for it."

[-]

jtriomino@reddit

The imposter syndrome is real. I got a surprise "certificate of appreciation" at work last week... on April 1st. My thought process went like this: 1 - oh this must be for someone else. 2 - oh is this a phishing test? 3 - oh wait, it's April fools....

I did verify with my boss that it was in fact real, and for me... and to "Take the compliment!" I was in a stress spiral the rest of the day.

[-]

_ficklelilpickle@reddit

Lmfao I had a last minute meeting scheduled between me, my boss and my boss’s boss for 9am on the 1st of April. It was for them to tell me my current boss is taking up a different position and I am their first and clear choice for his replacement. My first response was “you can’t set these types of meetings on April Fools, thats just cruel.”

[-]

Fappy_as_a_Clam@reddit

Oh God yes.

My whole working life I've had imposter syndrome.

[-]

mstermind@reddit

I had imposter syndrome for a very long time, until I finally realised I'm actually damn good at the things I'm doing. It was never about "faking it", but doing it as well as I could until I did it better.

[-]

TiEmEnTi@reddit

I generally have imposter syndrome day to day. I have no business being this well paid. Then a big project will happen and people come from offsite who are ostensibly supposed to be at my level/able to the same job, and I feel much better while they're around.

[-]

dogtagkz@reddit

I'm still in the transition phase from feeling like an imposter to I'm good at what I do.

[-]

mstermind@reddit

I had that transition phase too for a few years. Once you're out of it, you'll feel like a new person.

[-]

dogtagkz@reddit

Thank you for sharing the outcome.

[-]

noonesaidityet@reddit

Imposter syndrome is a real thing. Feeling like a fraud at all times in all things is the A #1 source of my anxiety.

[-]

troncatmeer@reddit

41, have yet to decide what “making it” is. Be assured I do fake it though

[-]

TheNaughtyDragon@reddit

I feel that a lot but every now and then realize it's just mostly own perception based on how you're treated. My manager making double my pay doesn't know 1/4 of the stuff I do at work. Then I meet their bosses and it just continues up the chain, That part empowers me knowing my own skills. What brings me down is how people on my level or below rely on my knowledge. Lile I learned to just do the work and the whys. I hate when people don't check work behind me assuming I didn't mess up but reality is they are used to me catching their mistakes and I need the same.

[-]

dcott44@reddit

Only on days that end in "y".

[-]

taleofbenji@reddit

I feel like I'm constantly on a knife edge between succeeding and failing horribly.

[-]

pink_faerie_kitten@reddit

I've faked it but still haven't gotten to the made it part.

[-]

SweetCosmicPope@reddit

I work in IT, and I started my career late at 29. But I've surpassed people who've been in the industry for much longer than I have. A large part of that is my drive, of course. But I've also just inserted myself into places of importance. I carry an air of importance and knowledge with me when I do things at work. And it's worked.

But every now and then I get told "you're being promoted" or "you're considered the SME in this technology" and I have to think to myself "ME?! Are you fucking crazy?"

[-]

Abpoe77@reddit

They made me a supervisor to a bunch of 18-30 year olds. I just laugh and ask 3 questions. Is it on fire? Is it upside down? Did anybody die? No? Go figure it out. I got other shit to deal with

[-]

MyBestCuratedLife@reddit

I think being a grown up is to realize: everyone is faking it. In fact, when people act like they know things from certain I’m even more sure they’re full of shit.

[-]

tillyspeed81@reddit

I’m a nurse, literally out motto…

[-]

txmascot01@reddit

I’m a global SME and I HATE when I’m asked questions that affect my group and down the line other groups on a global level. There are so many moving pieces that a 100% firm answer isn’t the whole story and those above us don’t understand the nuances. That said - been here 14 years and no one’s complaining, so I just keep rolling on.

[-]

phigene@reddit

I have been feeling like things are "too easy" for a very long time. I got a masters degree in physics, and have been working for 10 years as an engineer on pretty cutting edge stuff. And everyday I feel like i am just coasting. I feel like one day someone will catch on that I'm not working nearly as hard as other people, and Ill get fired.

And its true, I'm not. I almost never stay late, or work weekends, and I don't ever feel like I'm working even close to full capacity. I see other people stressing out, staying late, struggling to keep up, and I feel guilty that I'm not. But I never have late tasks, and my work is often commended as excellent, and I get maximum raises and promotions year after year. But every year I'm worried that the bosses will "catch on" that I'm actually just doing the bare minimum. So I don't know if its me being lazy or I'm just way better at managing my time and doing the work than like most of my peers.

I'm not complaining, but I am definitely always concerned that one day I'll be exposed for my utter lack of work ethic.

[-]

Skipper0463@reddit

I’m definitely faking it, have not yet made it.

[-]

SawkeeReemo@reddit

When does the “make it” part happen?

[-]

DarksunDaFirst@reddit

Sounds like a lot of your job is understanding the “lore” - the shit that really isn’t documented in policy or procedure. I’m in the same boat. I run the logistics aspect for our small pharmaceutical company and yes, I do “make up shit as I go”, but that’s the trick. Anyone can make up shit, but the trick is making up that works.

Some of that comes from experience, some of that comes from some base understanding of how 3rd party systems work and how to navigate and interact with them. Some of it comes down to an intuition (based on the first two items) of how something should or could work, because you know how to logically think it out and then figure out what the actual task is to accomplish and the means to accomplish that task.

This stuff isn’t written down anywhere. You just know how to get it done and produce results.

Also you can document your own work in some way to point to it later “hey, I did this.” And to you, it might seem simple and straightforward (and possibly it is), but only because you knew how to figure it out. To an outsider whose job it is to do something else, what you do might seem like magic because they have no knowledge or participation in that area.

So yes, imposter syndrome. As in, anyone who tries to do what you do but doesn’t understand what you do is the real imposter (oftentimes they’re a manager who doesn’t oversee you, or they’re HR)

[-]

flabergasterer@reddit

I'm a fellow faked-it-until-I-made-it in pharmaceutical logistics. This is the perfect field for such an approach to a career. I'm happy I accidentally stumbled upon it 20+ years ago.

[-]

DarksunDaFirst@reddit

Same! 2006 is when I started at a major pharm company as receiving clerk. Now I run my own department for a CDMO.

Question: do you also have fun deciphering legalese with customs and compliance like you’re a lawyer?

[-]

flabergasterer@reddit

In a past life I handled import and exports. Now I’m all domestic.

My journey in supply chain started as an IT intern at a chemical plant. Finished the IT stuff with 2 months left in the internship so I helped the shipping office since someone went on medical leave. I went from printing shipping labels to scheduling a bulk mix tank. Scheduling a mix tank sounded like “supply planning” so I applied for a supply planning analyst job. 20 years later I’m living the dream.

[-]

Indubitalist@reddit

You accumulate knowledge and expertise so gradually that you don’t notice how much you have, and you still feel like you’re the same guy as when you started working, when to the guy about to start the job you might as well be a god. It’s all about perspective. Sometimes you can’t give it to yourself and you need somebody else to tell you that you’re good. The trick is to believe them.

[-]

shiftdown@reddit

I've been faking my job now for a solid 10 years. I'll let you know if that ever changes.

[-]

Safe_Presentation_78@reddit

For me, I've come to realize what my strengths and weaknesses are, so I play to my strengths. I'm also now in a place where I no longer fear being perceived as inferior if I don't understand something, so I remain transparent.

In most cases, it's easier for me to be honest rather than anxious over things.

[-]

junto80@reddit

We all do. We have a club. We meet at the bar.

[-]

ColbyAndrew@reddit

Do you know how much beers cost at a bar?

[-]

ColbyAndrew@reddit

How many paychecks are you allowed to miss comfortably before you’re considered “making it”?

[-]

Late-External3249@reddit

Yep. I have been in chemical manufacturing since graduation. Started as a lab tech, then my manager quit. After a year without, they made me the manager. Did that for 7 more years and got head hunted for another company for a management role. I put it down to learning what the company does and generally pretending I know what I am doing

[-]

zt3777693@reddit

Yep.

My main issue is I’m still “behind” with a lot a life milestones (marriage, kids) and still getting shit from it from family.

[-]

cashews_clay15@reddit

Y’all have made it? I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.

[-]

Effective-Stress-781@reddit

I have been in my industry 25 years and lead a regional department. An old work acquaintance, who is renowned as an industry leader recently contacted me asking me if id be interested in applying for a country wide managerial role for a huge market leading company. He thought I'd be a good fit and he was in a strong position to recommend me. Think 100x more people and resources, 10 steps up and 4x pay. I explained I did not have skills in about half the areas required, and the response from the industry expert with all seriousness was 'fake it till you make it, lean on those around you'

[-]

Striking-Access-236@reddit

Is it you George Costanza?

[-]

tomahawk66mtb@reddit

Not gonna lie, "just show up" has done the lion's share of the work to build my career and an amazing life.

I guess when I say "show up" I also mean with intent/attitude to work. Or more specifically learn.

I've found that as I've gotten higher up I naturally prefer to hire people that demonstrate reliability and teachability above talent and experience.

[-]

OtherlandGirl@reddit

We’re all making it up as we go along!

[-]

genesimmonstongue415@reddit

I can totally relate. My success is cuz of my consistency. I just keep showing up.

[-]

_HeyBlinkin@reddit

I attribute this to boomer parenting of either leaving us to raise ourselves or just demanding more out of us, both absent of affirmation that modern parenting is trying to change.

Add in multiple financial crashes from the start of our careers where we fear layoffs or told we're lucky to have a job instead of a decent raise or promotion.

Yes we're all not sure if we're doing ok or not because no one tells us we are.

[-]

JaredUnzipped@reddit

You're not the only one. I'm 43 and have no idea what my purpose in life is supposed to be. Thank god my wife actually loves me, because no one else in this world would tolerate my mental and emotional problems. I expect everyone to disappoint me. I purposefully sequester and hide myself away to minimize the damage from dealing with other people.

If it weren't for my wife and my siblings, I would have ended things a long time ago. I just know how much doing something like that would hurt them. So, I just kind of exist in this perpetual state of not being alive, but not being dead. It's a walking purgatory.

As an adult in my thirties, I realized that I was abused as a child and that's why I'm so screwed up on the inside. I thought the way I was raised was normal, only to find out it wasn't. Whenever I go into public or deal with other people in person, I'm really awesome at putting on a mask and pretending that I'm fantastic. That's the coping mechanism I learned as a child to contain my parents' abuse. My first therapist called it the "Alligator Brain" where the mind is constantly in a super-responsive triage mode to keep their abuser calm. It causes the child to forgo developing their own desires in an effort to placate others.

The moment I can be to myself, the aforementioned mask comes off. I feel like my whole life has been an endless string of putting on different masks for other people. I don't know who I am, what I want out of life, or why I'm even on this floating rock. What's the point to any of this, really?

Most of my interests are just ways for me to distract myself in the meantime. I don't even know if I actually like them or not; I can't trust myself. It's just a way to fill the time between now and when I expire.

[-]

Sum1Xam@reddit

Better to have imposter syndrome than Dunning-Kruger imo.

[-]

Individual-Schemes@reddit

Nah - I work pretty hard and I live an authentic life.

[-]

CornishShaman@reddit

Yuuuup the whole time.

[-]

NumberNumb@reddit

Still waiting on the “make it” part

[-]

ClassicLightbulbs@reddit

Yeah it was upsetting and I fucking fixed that as soon as I realized it and started devoting my life to things on purpose instead of just floating around like a fucking boomer

[-]

aroundincircles@reddit

I’m in IT management at a multi billion dollar retail company. I have no clue what I’m doing, but it’s still working. I make million dollar decisions regularly. I just hope things work out.

I’ve been married nearly 20 years and have 5 kids. One day they’ll figure out I’m 20 years old in a 40 something’s body, and I have no idea what I’m doing there too.

But for now the balancing act is still perched so I’m good.

[-]

PL02550@reddit

And I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you any different. - Vonnegut Jr.

[-]

TheMysteriousSalami@reddit

My feeling is that most of human history, most of the time, in Faking It Until You Make It

[-]

MossyJoke@reddit

Well there’s no Dunning-Kruger here at least. Been in my field for 25 years and feel the imposter syndrome all the time.

[-]

beezchurgr@reddit

I struggled with this but then started working on self improvement. When a situation occurs where I am unsure about the best way to handle it, I will look for classes or resources to help me navigate it. As a result, I’ve become more competent and more confident. There’s free resources (highly dependent on the field. I work in government finance & use GFOA), consultant learning (I use Pryor), and lots of cheap or free community college courses. I started in my current position 4 years ago, and felt like I did not belong. I am now more competent than my peers with more experience because I am constantly working on myself.

And before you ask, yes it is exhausting. But it truly does help.

[-]

yespls@reddit

I could have written this myself. I have somehow managed to land - with no degree whatsoever - a 6 figure job in a technical field. I am the sole dependency for a lot of legacy work. I know how I got here, but I also don't know how I got here.

[-]

C_est_la_vie9707@reddit

I'm still 18 which is terrifying because I have a teen and tween and big girl job.

[-]

h0nkyJ@reddit

Yes.

It has always had me wondering if that's what everyone has always done, forever. 😫

[-]

teeseeuu@reddit

In my 20s, I was a Chef cooking in mid-higher end restaurants. Now, I supervise design processes for billion dollar construction projects. The disconnect with my younger self is real.

[-]

MagnumPIsMoustache@reddit

I’m in software development. I’ve pretty much built a career on (I think) average development skills but above average troubleshooting, and good people skills.

I constantly feel inferior, but I hide it and somehow I’ve been employed in IT for decades.

[-]

uniquecleverusername@reddit

https://www.smbc-comics.com/comic/2012-06-24

https://i.redd.it/z7o0ev45bstg1.gif

[-]

Verbull710@reddit

"just show up" aint an independant clause and therefor that there preceeding semicolon usage was unproper; I'm onto you, PHONY.

[-]

FoppyRETURNS@reddit

The second I started making it up as I went my potential got unleashed. I really used to be quite shy and careful about things.

I used to feel bad about it, but everyone else is out there making it up as they go along too. No one really 'knows.' The second you think you have it all figured out and get comfortable life catches you lacking.

You have to be humble yet confident asf to get through this life. And why shouldn't I be confident when everyone else is out there guessing too!

[-]

CubesFan@reddit

The only time I don't have imposter syndrome is at work. I am like you in that I do a great job and just make shit up all the time that legitimately changes how things are done in the organization, but I'm good at it so it generally makes things better. That's why they come to me.

My issue is that I could be doing many other things outside of work but don't know how, where, or with who to do it. My kids are grown and my wife is great, but not into everything I'm into, so I wonder what I could be doing all the time if I just knew the secret code to get into it.

[-]

hozay17@reddit

Same feels like faked my way through the navy, college, now work.

[-]

CheetahOfDeath@reddit

I definitely have imposters syndrome. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop and for it all to finally blow up but so far, so good. I guess.

[-]

CokeBottleSpeakerPen@reddit

99% of successful people in this life feel this way, and the people who aren't in your position would give their right arm to be. Just enjoy it.

[-]

AJ14847414@reddit

Plenty of problems in my career I didn’t know how the fuck I was going to solve. What I’ve been good at is identifying who I need to pull in that can help solve them.

[-]

DrButtgerms@reddit

I think your Aunt gave you that advice because that's how the world mostly works. There are exceptions of course, but in many cases, as long as the rationale is good, any idea is about as good as another.

[-]

Epicardiectomist@reddit

I never worked hard enough in school, I never worked hard enough at work, I never worked hard enough in life, I was just expected to fail. Both in my own head, and from the constantly exasperated and disappointed faces that surrounded me throughout my youth.

I did not fail, and I have no idea what to do about it. I assume that at any second, the rug is going to be pulled, the curtain will come up, and they'll say "sorry man, you're just a fucking failure".

[-]

No-Memory-2781@reddit

Still waiting for the “make it” part

[-]

Tiny_Entertainer_713@reddit

Imposter syndrome is a waste of time and stems not from self-hate, but from the irrational idolization of everyone else. Pretty much everyone is just improvising their way through life. There is no script. No one is in control. There is no master plan. You are probably doing about as well as can be expected.

[-]

GreedyComedian1377@reddit

Absolutely. Like I know im not faking my job, I'm quite good at my job and am pretty well respected in my company. That being said I still feel like I could be gone and nobody would really notice work wise. I figured out a long time ago its just as important to be friendly and liked by coworkers as being really good at the job.

[-]

mdmommy99@reddit

I always feel like this.

[-]

rwa2@reddit

Do you need a certificate or diploma or something? I've got a couple I could spare, they don't seem to do anything for my imposter syndrome.

[-]

Adrasteia-One@reddit

I feel this many times. I just take things one day at a time. Otherwise, the anxiety would be overwhelming.

[-]

QuickbeamsHaste@reddit

My motto: Never lie, “I don’t know” can be the best answer to a question, and know just enough to say whatever you say with confidence and you’ll be alright. Has worked for 15+ years in a very challenging field where I pretty much always feel half-informed.

[-]