For context, i have adhd (extreme hyperactive kind) and i am reduced to a drooling idiot on most people's view. Imagine papyrus from undertale but even weirder, yeah thats me. I have that cocaine snorter crazy man aura. People barely take me seriously even if i have something important, because i'm the special needs weird guy who people have to accept otherwise they're prejudicial. The way i speak is weird, the way i gesticulate is weird and the way i express myself is weird. Not to mention the whiny/emotional behavior i have that i'm constantly complaining and being overly emotional about things.

For context no, i do not have cognitive or socialization issues, i can do things fine and i am an organized, functional man, with friends and hobbies that involve getting my ass outside. the issue is that such things paint me as mentally disabled for people surrounding me and murders my own self esteem

I do not care if i should be myself, if masking is bad, or if this is going to harm me, i want those behaviors at the very least buried and hidden away from public view. Ive tried everything to work on myself, from meditation to some forms of medication like vyvanse and ritalin but nothing works. Preferably, i need to get rid ASAP of the cocaine vibe i give (in other words, be more calm) and the emotional fluctuations (stop feeling strong emotions).

I dont care about how it is done, or if its dangerous, as long as it works its good.