What are Xena and Gabrielle's love languages?
Posted by Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit | xena | View on Reddit | 34 comments
Judging by the number of times she tells Gabrielle she loves her, you'd think she was secretly a bard. She's definitely the more romantic of the two. For her, I'd say words of affirmation and quality time.
I can see her planning elaborate dates. Maybe they even carved their initials in a tree somewhere?
Since Gabrielle is the cook of the two, she definitely has made the dumplings with the red stuff inside for Xena's birthday. She also loves to pamper Xena when she gets the chance, and though Xena complains, she loves it. So, for her, I'd say acts of service and physical touch.
IseQween@reddit
For both, I think the "love language" is about establishing the other is "close" (in proximity). What strikes me most is that the action-oriented Xena primarily does that verbally, while the bardly Gabrielle does it physically.
Their journey together actually begins with Gabs guilting Xena to reach down and pull her up on Argo -- their first mutual hand grasps, riding against each other, Gabs holding on to Xena. Gabs communicates a lot through touch -- the midsection slap, brushing her hand across Xena's arm/knee, the playful kiss and hair caress when Xena's trying to sleep, leaning her head against Xena's shoulder -- as though making their connection "real," reassuring herself whatever the situation, that what matters most is literally feeling Xena is there. I believe she communicates her love in -- that she loves -- touching Xena.
For Xena, Gabrielle's name -- saying it -- is/means everything: Gabri-elllle. Gabrielle! Gabrielle? Gabrielle?! I can close my eyes and tell what's happening or Xena's emotions simply by how she vocalizes "Gabrielle" -- affection, danger/protectiveness, irritation, patience, empathy, encouragement, etc. Even when she pronounces Gabrielle's name to someone else, I can hear in her voice the admiration, confusion, etc. I don't recall her ever shortening it to "Gab," "Gabs" or "Gabby." I believe she communicates her love by - that she loves -- experiencing the fullness of expressing Gabrielle's name.
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
You truly have a knack for describing things in eloquent detail! I appreciate how much thought you put into this.
In truth, I didn't realize before just how physical Gabrielle was from the very beginning, but when I was watching some fan videos, it suddenly dawned on me. She did this a lot more after Xena's first death, I'm sure. Gabrielle's journey from bard to warrior reaches a climax when she kills to protect Xena, it's such an incredible moment bc she was on the path of love, and therefore had to hold a reverence for all life. But fighting for the love of her life becomes a way for her express her love. She does this through words as early as "The Reckoning" but it gradually becomes more physical.
Wow! You're right! Xena always says her full name. It's such a subtle way of establishing that she acknowledges Gabrielle completely for who she is and doesn't try to dumb her down. I also think it's beautiful that she has so many rich love confessions,, though they may have the effect of putting Gabrielle on a pedestal. Either way, Xena becomes more in tune with her emotions and general ability to express vulnerability the more time she spends with Gabrielle. They're such soulmates ❤️
Dishslave37@reddit
Soooooooo true on all accounts! I have ALSO been fascinated by the fact she never shortened her name in all of the yells for her, and I think it shows massive love and respect.
Jahon_Dony@reddit
I think being best friends, as well as mentor / mentee, and knowing they have some kind of bond across time covers it all mostly.
ObnoxiousConsistent@reddit
idk somehow i think they are both a bit acts of service… considering their propensity to die / get into mortal danger for each other 😅😂
redpukee@reddit
"Did you hear that, Xena? This woman just described every day of our lives!" -- after Gabby sees a fortune teller who warns of "much danger."
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
You're totally right! 🤣
Dishslave37@reddit
Not a lie was told. Lol
Dishslave37@reddit
I feel like Gabby's is act of service. She's always wanting to jump in and help. And I agree Xena's is words of affirmation for sure!!!
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
It's adorable how many times Xena tells Gabrielle she loves her 🥹
Dishslave37@reddit
Especially after being big and bad evil dark Xena. Lol She really did become a softy!! The UNSCRIPTED "Oh sweetheart" in Family Affair and the hand kisses.... I MELTED!! And Renee said in one of the Coffee talks she expressed bad childhood experiences through her acting....so I can't help but wonder if that's what made her cry in that scene. AND Lucy knows about them, so it would definitely explain the unscripted "Oh sweetheart" after she drops the sword and hugs her. 😉
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
Every time Xena kissed Gabrielle's hands, my heart melted! Who knew an ex-warlord could be capable of treating someone with such tenderness and warmth??
I don't think I'll ever grow tired of seeing these two love one another. "The Abyss" has so many beautiful moments where Xena looks at Gabrielle like she's a miracle, and I think I heard that the kiss Xena gave Gabrielle shortly after they escaped from the cannibals wasn't even scripted 😭😭
That "oh sweetheart" tugs on the heartstrings, for sure!
Dishslave37@reddit
I'm pretty sure that's because she never wanted to be a warlord in the first place, even though it was in her blood, it was just the card's life handed her. I would YOTALLY BELIEVE if it wasnt scripted! A lot of things Lucy does, weren't scripted. Like alot. Lol and she kept joking about all they cared about was the hair clip talk from the family affair scene with a meet in the woods, but it was supposed to be a really simple meeting.And the script simly said said, "and there's gabrielle" and I believe the rest of that scene was mostly Lucy's doings. She has also said numerous times that she doesn't like to read lines flat and she likes to experiment. And as a fellow Aries myself, I totally get why. It's so much easier to feed off of the moment then to read lines. Even the little Shhhhh's Xena did between the hand kisses had me like 🥹🥹🥹🥹 And wait wait wait which kiss?! I'm blanking out! Lol The forehead one in the cave???
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
And we love her for going above and beyond with her performances!
Another kiss was planned for The Quest...Gabrielle was supposed to transfer the ambrosia through lip contact, but it didn't end up happening.
Yep! It's the forehead kiss, I believe. It happens just as Xena is urging Gabrielle to wake up.
Dishslave37@reddit
Awwwwwww so freakin sweet! And I wish we would have gotten that abrosa scene and the ACTUAL kiss, turn her alive instead of autolycus.
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
That would've been a sight to behold!
MusicIsLife81@reddit
I found out Lucy did a DV commercial in 1997 and I always wondered if Renee's past ever had any influence on her doing that commercial or not. After I found out about Renee's past, for some reason I now have a hard time watching Remember Nothing because I wonder if her character being treated the way she lived for awhile brought up any bad memories for her from her childhood or if she was able to channel those emotions to help make it even better and more believable?
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
I can imagine she used the emotions from before to fuel her performance in some way, but it must've been painful, yeah.
The part where Gabrielle's talking to Sarah about her choices to survive, not being her fault, and her just being a child mirrors really well what it's like to come clean about trauma in childhood and no longer being ashamed of it. Really, there's nothing to be ashamed of anyway. I do think Renee might've been relating what she experienced to the words Gabrielle was telling Sarah 😭
Dishslave37@reddit
VERY good point!!!! I had the same thought. Probably a little of both. But I was STUNNED at how well Lucy played Xena in the scenes from the episode. And grabbing that dudes wrist and saying DON'T TOUCH HER or in the Ides of March scene when she said GET YOUR FILTHY HANDS OFF HER!!!! The LOOK she had in her eyes in that scene, too! Also in the Deliverer when she said what have you done to her YOU BASTARD!!!.....It all makes sense if you really think about it. 😉
MusicIsLife81@reddit
Oh my gosh I didn't even think about those other scenes! Now I'll never look at them the same either, but you are right the look in Lucy's eyes is just incredible, like she was not only Gabrielle's protector on the show as Xena, but now also Renee's.
Dishslave37@reddit
Very true!!! All those scenes combined tend to give the full picture. And if they didn't simply adore one another in real life, none of those scenes would have come across as amazing as they did.
Dishslave37@reddit
This clip to be exact. Even in this scene!!!! Lucy supported her, with her hand on her shoulder!!! God i love those two!!!!!
(https://youtu.be/aTLzY5jiRbo?si=DB1YPU-uE6CjXM_S)
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
Renee is a lovely person, and this clip made me love her even more. As someone who hailed from an abusive home, she articulated the general confusion and forced image of a normal family really well.
Lucy's hand on her shoulder as she started to cry got to me. I know Renee was more reserved than Lucy, but this puts into perspective a little bit of what she was dealing with at the time. Anyway, glad to see she's doing better now.
I wonder how much of her own experiences might've impacted how she chose to act during Gabrielle's interactions with her family. I wished they appeared more than they did. It's tragic how someone as loving as Gabrielle never seemed to get acceptance from her birth family, but I know she got it from Cyrene, Lila, and Xena, so that makes up for it ☺️
sikander_itaque@reddit
I am very new to the Xenaverse (watched it when I was a kid and rewatching rn). Could you explain to me what happened to Renee in her childhood and what'd the deal with her family ?
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
As far as I know, her biological father was abusive. She seems to be on good terms with her stepdad, though. Apparently, this explains why Renee was so closed off when she started being a part of Xena.
I don't know the nature of the abuse, nor is it my business to uncover that, but I will say that she was part of a short film where the main character essentially has no one to look over her kids. She's part of the National Guard and can't stay in the country to care for her children. So, the only thing she can do is leave them to live with her parents, and she didn't want that to happen, primarily because of her father.
Dishslave37@reddit
Very true.....I myself can relate to the lack of acceptance part. It isn't something you could ever understand unless you have lived it.
West-Surround-8857@reddit
Seems you are using a standard model i don't know.
Can you tell me the model's name so i can read the definitions in order to understand your post?
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
I'm not entirely sure what you mean. I was just going off of what I thought.
There are 5 love languages: words of affirmation, receiving gifts, acts of service, physical touch, and quality time. But it mostly comes down to how you think X/G express their love for one another, so you don't have to label it, necessarily.
Evilbuffy14@reddit
Hmm. I don't know. This is a tough one because I think they change.
Xena starts out as Gift Giving with some Quality Time on the side. As their relationship deepens, she changes to Physical Touch with Words Of Affirmation as second.
Gabrielle starts as Physical Touch with Acts Of Service. Then moves to Quality Time and Words Of Affirmation.
Ok_Kangaroo_2160@reddit (OP)
I think you're right about it changing over time.
Gabrielle started as the more physical of the two, but by the end, we have Xena adorning her hands with kisses 😭
Dishslave37@reddit
AHHHHHHHH HOW COULD WE FORGET PHYSICAL TOUCH LMAOOOO I think you are correct on all accounts. It's also interesting how their love languages change over time.
BigFitMama@reddit
Xena - performative: plops large beast by the campfire I know you like wild boar.
Gabrielle - caregiver)gatherer: Let me get you cleaned up, get you a bath, and wash your hair. I found these flowers and the lore says they make a great shampoo. And these wild garlic and tubers I found will go great with roasted boar.
Gibsonian1@reddit
Xena gives fish.
krisn31@reddit
😂underrated comment