Teen caught smoking pot

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3652@reddit

Op I’ve been in the same boat. We have tried to ensure he understands moderation. My wife has had a medical card for 13+ years so we can’t throw too many stones in our glass house.

Greasystools@reddit

Pfft we all did that

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EmotionalVegetable48@reddit

Whether one thinks thx/weed/dope is cool, it is often a developmental detriment. I don’t think kids can “power through” life. The competition is way too tight.

I stopped growing as a professional, stopped growing athletically, and really stunted relationships.

Once I quit dope, it all came back. Same as my friends. Some didn’t quit til 40.

Not sure what to do, but you are wise to want to stop it. Godspeed.

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whatsasimba@reddit

Sanjay Gupta wrote an editorial piece years ago, where he basically recanted his earlier opinions about weed, said he based it all on government guidance, and now hes seen how its been helpful in seizure disorders and other medical uses.

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Queasy-Let-6910@reddit

Baby Boomer Moms smoked cigarettes and drank when they were pregnant with GenX...for the most part, we did not continue with that. Why? We know better and more information. Cannabis usage on developing teen brains can permanently changes their brain chemistry. I tell my kids once they're in the 20's, feel free, but until then no bueno.

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marge7777@reddit

Go to any jr high. They are all vaping. Weed and nicotine. This is pretty normal. Talk to them about being safe, not buying weed from drug dealers and not getting in cars with high drivers.

They're not "all" vaping. My son and his friends are not, and plenty of others aren't either.

(And before anyone says "oh mom you're just being naive" we have these conversations open and honestly, and I know who is doing what). My 22 year old has friends who vape and do drugs but he does not, and will not.

To OP, have an open and honest conversation with your kid. Is it legal for someone at their age to be doing it? Do they understand that smoking and getting behind the wheel of a car is dangerous? It can screw up their future if they get caught.

If they want to continue to smole, are they getting it from legit sources? The very last time I smoked weed, it was laced with something and I never touched it again.

Is it recreational? Every day, multiple times a day?

I know plenty of people who use responsibly, and then I know plenty who gave smoked themselves into oblivion and went down the path of harder drugs.

Best of luck.

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moooeymoo@reddit

Gen X here too, pretty much everyone has covered it. Just wanted to add that you said his friends are the instigators. Um, we know from our own Gen X childhood that our parents said that too, and we were 100% as instigating as our friends 😃

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Flufnstuf@reddit

The best conversation about pot, and one I wish someone had with me, was on South Park. Randy tells Stan that pot isn’t going to kill him or turn him violent (something like that) but pot makes you feel okay with being bored and it’s when you’re bored is when you should be doing something or learning something new.

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SavoirFaire2Middling@reddit

I told my friend, "I think smoking all this pot is making us apathetic."

He said, "Ah, who cares about that, man."

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

The South Park moment I will go find and show him

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Flufnstuf@reddit

https://youtu.be/Jd4cASkBAp0?si=YzY1SQdv9af7bUwa

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fallenredwoods@reddit

I totally agree with the South Park take. Myself and a few friends started smoking pot in high school and we all still do 25 years later. I have one friend that doesn’t do shit besides play video games and lives with his parents. Pot should not be smoked by people who aren’t internally motivated to do stuff…

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Friday_arvo@reddit

If your kid is on the ADHD spectrum his experience with weed will be different to that of his friends. Weed actually grounds people with ASD and ADHD. Something about endoctrines or something or other. I was reading about this the other day. It’s why ADHD kids have higher risk of using marijuana day to day. He’s probably finally got a quiet mind.

How manage it all is up to you but consider getting some CBD oils which is non-psychoactive but still has the grounding effect…. Apparently. There’s a lot of research out there about the benefits of medicinal cannabis and emotional overwhelm that ADHDers experience. It’s really interesting. Anyway. I’ve said nothing helpful probably. Best of luck.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Actually, I found this comment to be extremely insightful and helpful so thank you had not had anybody reply along these lines

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Friday_arvo@reddit

Here’s some research I found (not what I read weeks ago) I just thought it was important to provide as I noticed someone else shared links as to why it might be problematic or not so helpful. But these studies have quite large samples. Obviously I’m not saying “let the boy light up” because putting any kind of smoke in your lungs is problematic long term.

WHY IT MIGHT WORK — The Endocannabinoid System (ECS) The most important piece to understand is the biology behind why cannabis-based oils could help neurodivergent people. The endocannabinoid system (ECS) is a signalling network in the brain that regulates mood, emotional responses, social behaviour, and neurotransmitter activity. Research has found this system is disrupted in both ADHD and ASD. For ADHD: There is emerging evidence that the ECS plays a significant role in the pathophysiology of ADHD. Research suggests a number of neurobiological connections between endocannabinoid function and cognitive dysfunction seen in ADHD, making the ECS a possible target for treatment. Dopamine and the ECS have a bidirectional relationship — cannabinoids affect the dopamine system, and dopamine affects the ECS. Since ADHD is fundamentally a dopamine dysregulation disorder, this is a meaningful connection. 📄 Ryan et al. (2024) — Scoping Review — Developmental Psychobiology “Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Cannabis Use, and the Endocannabinoid System: A Scoping Review” Thomas Jefferson University / Published September 2024

🔗 https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/39267530/

🔗 Full text also available: https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/10.1002/dev.22540

Whole Plant Extract vs Isolate — A Key Finding This is particularly relevant for anyone using a blended oil (containing both CBD and THC). A randomised controlled trial with 150 participants (50 whole-plant extract, 50 purified CBD isolate, 50 placebo) found: ∙ Whole-plant extract CBD: Significantly reduced disruptive behaviours compared to placebo (p = 0.005) and improved social functioning (p = 0.009) ∙ Purified CBD isolate: No significant effects observed This suggests the “entourage effect” — the interaction of multiple cannabinoids together — may matter more than CBD in isolation. 📄 Systematic Review of CBD Trials in Neurodevelopmental Disorders — ScienceDirect (2023) “A systematic review of cannabidiol trials in neurodevelopmental disorders”

🔗 https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0091305723000941

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Friday_arvo@reddit

I’m actually prescribed cannabis oil and flower by my regular doctor to help with emotional regulation (an ADHD/ASD symptom) because I didn’t want to develop dependency on things like diazepam/valium etc and the oil works very similarly (for me) to those that use CBD:THC oil based liquids to manage seizures. It’s also worth noting, I’m not in the midst of adolescent development - so this isn’t advice so much as it is sharing my experience as someone who struggled with ADHD as a young person and manages it now with natural products. As mentioned, it’s provided through prescription via a medical doctor who has taken my “child and adult” medical history into consideration as well.

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Star8421774@reddit

Scientific evidence shows either marijuana WORSENS ADHD symptoms or has no effect on them at all. The idea it has benefits for those with ADHD is completely anecdotal. People with ADHD have almost a 3 fold increased risk of developing CUD (cannabis use disorder). Just because we smoked it as teens doesn’t make it ok for young teens. Cigarettes were cool too and look at all the lung cancer. There is definitely mounting evidence of negative consequences of marijuana in young brains, let alone ones with ADHD.

Cannabis Use in a Community-Based Sample of Adults Diagnosed With ADHD: Prevalence, Impact on Symptoms, and Stimulant Side Effects

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/40874736/

A naturalistic examination of the effects of chronic and acute cannabis use on cognition and perceived symptoms of attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/41062851/

Cannabis use in Attention - Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD): A scoping review

https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36508935/

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RetireWithoutBorders@reddit

My older boy smoked (and ate) cannabis like it was going out of style. He was super intelligent and had terrible anxiety. He tested out of high school a year early and scored 1520 on the SAT. The cannabis would calm him down. My younger son tried it a couple of times but - like me - couldn’t stand it.

Just make sure you purchase from a reputable store.

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Alltheprettydresses@reddit

It's not all fun and games. People are losing or not getting jobs for smoking weed. It might be legalized, but depending on the field, it might not be allowed for safety reasons. Where I work, employees are losing good jobs ( benefits, paid time off, retirement plans, etc) over weed. My son just got his CDL and dream job, and I told him do not screw this up. Plus, people still lace weed. Stop the habit now.

My parents smoked weed and told me in great detail about their poor decisions and actions as a result. My husband and I never touched it. We were never interested or curious. We've had friends get into dumb stuff over weed. In my house, it's a no. I told my kids that once they're 18 and out of my home, it's on them. They've never smoked. My daughter even turned down gummies and brownies. Why? One, her job. Two, she saw the dumb mistakes and tragedies of operating vehicles and machinery under the influence.

Be honest about the good and bad (people smoke for a reason), set ground rules, and watch their association.

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

If you buy from a dispensary, it will never be laced. Another benefit of legalization.

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

Again s downvoted for stating a simple fact? Whatever, people.

One can disagree, that's cool. Downvoting because one disagrees makes me wonder about one's understanding of facts.

Photobuff42@reddit

"Where the friends are the instigators"

Why isn't anyone ever interested in taking responsibility instead of pushing off onto others?

Your son made a series of poor choices. Why push that off onto "friends"?

It bothers me..

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ImmediateHospital9@reddit

Those goddamn friends will ALWAYS get you when you least expect it.

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4thdegreeknight@reddit

I grew up in a circle of friends who all had older siblings that got into drugs so we avoided it. Yes sometimes we drank some Boones farm but that was about it.

I am an old dad, I told my kid that if he ever decided to do drugs or drink (I stopped drinking many years ago) that our deal would be he would have to wait until he was 18 to get a car and he would have to move out to get it.

Now my kid has never had any desire to drink or do drugs, he actually doesn't even drink soda but we talk about peer pressure and the total acceptance of drugs and underage drinking.

He knows that my friends son who was about 9 years older than him died when he was 16 due to a party drug containing Fent. He also knows that my best friend died before he was born from DUI.

The thing is I haven't changed my views on drugs and drinking because as some on here would say I became a boomer, nope its because I have known so many people in my life who either died, was killed or wasted their life on drugs, including a sibling.

This winter I plan on taking my son to our local homeless shelter, I used to volunteer there everyweek before he was born. I remember one time a mom came in with her kid and said that we could have him there for one month because she wanted to show him where he could end up if he kept messing around.

He was hanging out with the wrong crowd and was a wanna be cholo. He ended up straightening up I think it was because one of our homeless clients died in a very bad way in front of us. They had to go through security before entering the shelter and he shot up all that he had before going in and collapsed in front of us. One of the older volunteers told the kid, this is what happens when you mess with that shit.

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puppymama75@reddit

There may be a hidden root cause for the behavior. Getting high recreationally is 1 thing; getting super stoned on the regular is another thing.

The majority of young teens using cannabis routinely are self medicating for some reason or other. It may be painful for you to contemplate, but I know that above all else you want to keep your kid safe and loved.

So: Is there a source of pain in this teen’s life that they are trying to numb out? A broken heart? Being bullied? A secret they are afraid to tell anyone about? Did they go through anything really tough when they were younger? A bad accident, a tough surgery, a death of a loved one?

It’s a distinct possibility.

If so, getting expert help for the pain will actually treat the wound that the bong is a bandaid for.

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regeya@reddit

As a super stoned GenXer I concur, if someone is getting high on the regular it's probably for self medication

And PSA, be careful on treadmills, as we get older, we get more brittle

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puppymama75@reddit

I was a model student nerd GenXer until I had a horrific surgery, then became the bottle toking expert for my entire grade. So. I am speaking from personal experience but now also with research cred from now working in public health. I appreciate the support.

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Successful-Crazy2709@reddit

It seems you know of this brittleness from experience. Are you sure you weren’t just extra crispy?

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regeya@reddit

It took a piece of donor bone, a plate, and a bunch of screws to put my humerus back together. I'm hoping my shoulder will stop hurting sometime before I die. Just kidding, it doesn't hurt all the time, just a lot.

But I feel thankful, it's the only hardware I have, thus far, and one of the only surgeries I've had so far. I feel pretty fortunate.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Overweight and ADHD

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Heyhello70@reddit

I told my son truthfully what I thought and I made sure I put the medical spin on it. I was a cadc for a while so I talked to him a lot about what drugs do to the brain. But here's the thing when I was little and people were talking to me about it they said it stunts your growth. I didn't know what that meant until now I'm 55 and I understand what it means. It means emotionally you will be immature if you stick with a drug to help you with your emotions. You will be emotionally stunted. Emotionally immature- not being able to ride an even temperment. You'll have ups and downs with anxiety and depression and you won't have control over them. I wish I would have been told this when I was younger because this I understand the other stuff I didn't. Addiction nope try brain changes that wont change back to normal after you stop. Altering your brain chemistry.

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Heyhello70@reddit

I guess a scary part (looking back) would be I don't know where it changed for me. I mean was it the first time or the fifth time or the 150th time or the 2000s time when was it that I became physically chemically changed? That's unknown. That's some scary shit. So you could talk about science. Best of luck.

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Snoo-53133@reddit

Agreed with this....you're brain isn't "finished" until age 25-26, and we really didn't KNOW this until a few years ago. Modern science and medical technology are constantly evolving to give us better answers and solutions. Unfortunately, that may require changes in how we manage issues.

Fair enough. I also work in the mental health field and the stuff that’s being sold right now which is legal in my state is much much stronger than the stuff we smoked back in the day.

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beckybooboo1978@reddit

I was the parent that didn’t think pot was a big deal. I used it all when I was young and ended up ok. So when my daughter was smoking at 14, I didn’t come down on her huge.
I wish I had. It became a gateway and now at 27, she is not thriving. Drugs are an ongoing issue. She lives with me, unemployed, and has served jail time in the past.
I’m not saying that this will happen to your kid, I just wish I had handled it differently. Who knows if that would have changed things. Given the chance to do it again, I would make clear expectations and boundaries.

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RetroBerner@reddit

You sure the pot was the gateway and not drinking? I don't know anyone who's "gateway" was weed, so it just sounds off to me.

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SunshynePower@reddit

I can intro you to my Mom. She started with weed and then the 70s were a flurry of drugs. She was able to get off everything but weed.

That was fun for me and my brother /s

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roadtrip-ne@reddit

I don’t know man. It’s gotta be tough to be a parent, but we all drank beer in the woods and ran from the cops and got high whenever someone was passing something around.

You can’t say anything goes, but most of us had enough common sense to get through those years without much hassle.

2nd…fucking fent. Full disclosure I used to buy really good weed off a crack dealer in my hood, he made a shit ton of money and was the only person we knew that had “kind bud” but he use to sprinkle a lil crack dust in all the brick weed he sold cause “it keeps em coming back and then they want crack” (I know that’s fucked up but we was raised in a really poor uneducated area and at the time, that shit was street genius to me).

They can just sprinkle some fent in a bag and boom, kids done.

Im not in the game anymore but i still know a couple life longs and they are pressing and selling EVERYTHING with fent in it, pressed pills - fent, Xan bar -fent, god damn fent patches and they chew them on the side of their mouths…its too dangerous.

So, it’s not that yall not cool, its not that its bad for a kid to experiment some its because the GAME HAS CHANGED.

I used to get sheets of acid 2 people removed from the chemist, I used to drive with friends to Mexico for medical grade…everything but it just ain’t as safe. It’s never going to be. Unless yall are going to test it, and let the experiment after, you gonna have to make theses kids understand that the risk is just too high (pun intended)

Sorry for the wall of text, I’m mostly typong this to try and reason it out with yall before this inevitable conversation happens with one or both my kids so Gen X…let’s have it out! Thoughts?

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GTRWLD@reddit

This times a fucking BILLION!!! Fent has changed everything. My youngest son smokes weed and luckily we live in a legal state. I tell him I’ll help him buy from a dispensary if he’s short on cash, just so he doesn’t buy off the street.

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Swimming_Bonus_8892@reddit

Ok…so how has this worked. I’m really nervous about this because i don’t want to condone it but in reading these comments and other things it maybe the only way.

Weed was a gateway drug for me (I’m not judging no one else I’m stating for me, weed got me into some heavy shit) and so I’m torn between being like my parents with alcohol (they let us drink at the house but all parents knew and you couldn’t leave) or just paying for it and being like look, you cant do this shit in front of me but I’m not stupid. Because truth is, I can probably get over that part but I ain’t trying to bury my kid because I was too stubborn to see the writing on the wall.

Im in a spot now where weed has always been chill, but drinking is frowned upon and when i came out here kids was dying ALL the time from drinking and driving and i always attributed it too their parents didn’t teach them how to drink responsibly…mine did and it took the mystery and sting out of when we were alone as kids with alcohol because we were taught…don’t drink and drive, get what you need, house up, stay put, order pizza…everybody lives to do it again next weekend.

Are you finding it works like that with your kiddo and weed?

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GTRWLD@reddit

It sounds like we have pretty similar backgrounds. My brothers and I all partied pretty heavily in the 70’-80’s-90’s and our folks hated it. When I had kids I decided to go the other way and be truthful about my past experiences. So far my kids haven’t had any major issues. I guess you could say I was condoning it but it seems like talking about it worked way better than how my folks did it.

The other issue these days is buying anything off the streets can literally kill you. Fentanyl is no joke. My good friend lost his brother a few years ago and that was close enough for me. It’s a different world these days.

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Swimming_Bonus_8892@reddit

Man, you ain’t Neva lie…that’s what I’m really worried about. That’s my biggest fear. We use to go out and drink and take anything that wasn’t nailed down. From blind drunk moonshine to peyote to liquid dilaudid. I mean when I look back it’s fucking crazy that we made it as far as we did and I’m not in anyway condoning it but it was just…safer. I saw a news article a few years back and these lil kids man like the oldest was 19 and there were like 5 of them In FL I think and they bought a 10 pack of xan bars at the club (they each only ate one) and the cop vid was them sprawled out over a picnic table, one dead in the drivers seat I mean it was a mass murder scene and all they did man was go to the club and buy some fucking…bars…on spring break…like everyone DOES that.

My heart just sank, I’ve never felt so vulnerable like ever and all I could think about was my kids, their parents and the lives that had been lost cause these kids ate ONE single pill and died. I flashbacked to ALL the times I was out and someone just handed me something and said it’s good…XYZ and I just took it.

In that moment I gathered myself, walked out to meet my wife and she looked at me and just said “Baby, what is wrong, who died” I said…kids and it’s not gonna be ours and I just walked outside. Honestly, I think about those kids and their parents all the time with sense of impending doom.

When my mom and dad were yelling at me, “you don’t know what’s in that”! and I’m like pssssssssssssshhhh it’s just Valium or whatever NOW I see and I’m just scared to death it’s going to happen to us or one of our adopted neighborhood kids.

My dad only left the south 2 times in his life. Once to take my mom on a cruise because they had worked them selves to the bone and my mom made him go and when my 1st kid was born…they just showed up at the hospital. When I brought the kid out to show the GPs my father pulled me to the side with a significant amount of force (that’s another story) and says…Boy, are you happy? I said “yes dad” he said…”Do you feel so full of love you could about burst”? I nodded…”yes dad” he says…”Well, you should enjoy that for about the next 30 seconds and then think real hard about what I’m about to tell you” and I just sighed “ok”… he leans in closer and says…”Now, the world finally has something it can take from you, all that running around you did (touring musician), traveling the world, all that partying and then meeting the love of your life and now you’re right where I was so many years ago, so know this…you can lose your wife and it’s awful, but you can get up and find love again, you can’t replace a child and the world knows that so…the WORLD finally has something it can take from and your wife and you both would do well to remember that”.

I strait up froze man. I looked at my wife and my new born and I was so full of love, hope and wonder and my heart just sank and my dad says “welcome to being a parent, it’s the most rewarding, gut wrenching thing you or your wife will ever do” and with that my dad and mom shuffled out the hospital. At first I was mad, then I got it, THEN I saw that vid about all them kids dying off fent… I think ima take yalls advice and create a safe space for them and talk them through EVERY single part of it. Thanks man, I needed some advice today and reddit has its moments but for me I would say today is one of them.

The reason generations span about 20 years is both biological and sociological. Each of the six phases of a human life lasts about 20 years: childhood, adulthood, midlife, old age, and senescence. Likewise, human cultures typically organize the social phases on (roughly) the same cycle. In this way, a generation is formed as its members grow up in a similar cultural mileu and experience major societal events together. This shared perspective "locks in" certain attitudes, perceptions, and beliefs about the world.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Math freaks it was a typo I was an 80’s teen mkayyyy?

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SuzQP@reddit

I thought it might be interesting to you! No harm intended.

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SuzQP@reddit

Just thought you'd probably want to know!

The real conversation that you need to have is, "What emotion are you escaping when you do this?" This kind of conversation opens up dialogue because there is no wrong answer, especially at this age.

The answers you hope to hear are that they were bored and curious. The ones about not wanting to feel left out are fairly benign. If they say that they want to escape deep sadness, stop internal criticisms, calm down or sleep, you have a teen self-medicating when they actually need mental health help.

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Sad-Macaroon9067@reddit

Absolutely this. If you feel like you "need it," why? Let's address that.

Beyond that, early drug/alcohol use is terrible for developing brains. Talk about the science. Remind them that it is your responsibility to keep them safe and developmentally appropriate. Just like you made them stay in a car seat until big enough for a seat belt, kept them in breast milk/formula until they could eat table food, etc...

My parents allowed us to drink alcohol at home, with meals, and not to excess. I rarely drink, my brother had a DUI at 17 and is a certified stoner. 🤷‍♀️ We followed a similar path with my kids--there was one other household where they were allowed to drink. (A very close family friend.) They didn't have to sneak, so the desire to experiment really wasn't there. They are both adults who drink occasionally, but not to excess.

Keep those doors of communication open and be consistent with your rules. But realize that the more draconian the rules, the more likely your teen is going to want to rebel. Good luck.

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mom2artists@reddit

Yeah I would probably be a real pita about “what’s wrong why are you feeling the need to do this”

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foureyedgrrl@reddit

Experimentation and curiosity are healthy and normal at this age, so leading with "What's wrong?" was not exactly where I was trying to go. As much as we would like teens to refrain from alcohol, sex and drugs, they are going to do it whether we like it or not. This has been true since the beginning of time and nothing new.

Most dangerous substance use/abuse disorders start with an inability to deal with specific emotions. Opening up the dialogue around things like, "I feel like I don't fit in," or "I never felt happiness before trying it," or "I hate how lonely I feel," are only going to come up in an environment that they feel safe in. All feelings are normal. It's our job to teach them how to deal with their tricky emotions without shaming them for not yet having the skills to do so. They also have surging hormones at this stage, which can make everything involving emotions far more complicated.

My Mom told me she knew I wasn't going to "behave" but was sure to instill in me that all actions had consequences.

She encouraged me to come to her with questions or conversations about drugs, drinking, sex, anything. And I did. And we'd talk about it. And I wasn't punished, but she did her best to try to make sure I was safe.

You can't stop your kids from doing things unless you basically lock them up. But you can try to foster a relationship of trust and try your best to be there if they need you.

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Responsible-Bee1194@reddit

I learned it from watching you!

Vapes are bad due to the crap oils they use as a solvent.

Smoking flower provides mucho carcinogens.

Whatever you do-remember you are not only parenting in the now but for the future relationship you want with them.

My son and I get along really well now - but my escalating reaction to his use of pot destroyed his trust in me while 14-17. He moved out eventually and I was a wreck. He was buying in bulk and disseminating it to friends. I flipped out. He had really poor grades. He also had very bad ADHD and was using his meds to ‘get by’ which meant ‘D’s.

He is doing GREAT now. Doesn’t use and has a very demanding but fulfilling vocation after a few years at college. He’s also an EMT. But that time is like a scar / a wound.

I’m not totally sure how I would differently. But talking and listening is more important than anything. I would start with getting MYSELF in therapy and gain advice on parenting a teen ASAP.

I've done the every day all day thing plenty of times in my own life and I'd lie to myself and tell myself it's no big deal, it's just weed, yada yada yada. But when you smoke every single day, multiple times per day, you're going to get a really bad tolerance. You're going to notice that your highs aren't lasting long enough. That you have to smoke more and more and more just to get the same high you used to get 6 months ago. There's simply no future in everyday all day cannabis use, because you just end up consuming more and more and more of it. Which, isn't cheap. The shit can be crazy expensive. Or, they go towards dabs and concentrates, and that's even worse. The reality is that there's no future, cause you just have to use more and more, then you get even less high, then you have to use more and more, then you get even less high...

It's an awful cycle.

What I do now, is I allow myself to smoke 4 out of 7 days. I don't smoke on Mondays, Wednesdays or Fridays. I work out on those days, so I just don't smoke on workout days. For the 4 days that I am allowed to smoke, I only allow myself to smoke 3 times.

Three discrete smoking sessions. NO BOOSTER HIGHS (a booster high is what my buddy does. I will smoke with him, and I shit you not... 28 minutes later he's always "boosting" his high with more hits. Which just goes to show you how shot his tolerance is)

So, I allow for 3 highs on my smoking days, but I MUST come back to 100 percent sobriety, completely sober, before my next session. Reason being, people that just keep smoking and smoking, they're just in this out of it fog that sucks. I've been there, done that. Fuck that shit. I've learned. It's taken me 30 something years, but I've finally fucking learned.

Never smoke more than 4 days out of 7

Never smoke more than 3 discrete times on your smoke days

Never do a booster high

As long as you stick to that schedule, or even better if possible, you won't go too far down the rabbit hole, and you won't have a shot tolerance that will ruin everything for you.

Also, when you do smoke, you'll actually be legitimately high for like 2 hours

That's the way to sell them on this plan. I try to tell my good buddy who has no willpower that I'm doing this because I'm SELFISH. I'm doing this because I love weed so much, that I want to actually be truly high when I smoke.

The only way to be TRULY high, is to have your tolerance in check, and the only way to have your tolerance in check is to limit your blaze up sessions.

I blaze up a total of 12 times per week, but I have buddies that I shit you not, blaze up 7 to 8 times every single day, which means 49 or 56 highs per week. A non smoker might think my 12 blaze ups is a lot, but it's a drop in the bucket compared to true weed heads.

Being a weed head is no longer a compliment. It's just bad form. Sorry homies. I love weed as much as the next guy.

But it's like loving donuts. I love donuts too, but I can only eat one donut every couple of weeks at the most. No dumbass is out there eating a donut every single fucking day.... (i hope, lol)

Would you let him smoke cigarettes?

Would you let him work full time?

All of these things are age-restricted for good reasons, even the ones that aren't chemical in nature. Once you reach adulthood, the choices you make are yours alone, for better or worse. Smoking pot isn't a crime (in many places, but obviously not ALL places), so the problem isn't the pot - it's the age.

If he was caught driving without a license and below the age for a permit, as his parents, you'd be on the hook for that and could lose insurance coverage. If he's smoking pot below the legal age in your location, as his parents, you might be on the hook for any number of things - any destruction of property, contributing the the delinquency of a minor, even a visit from Child Protective Services.

Ultimately, I think putting less of an emphasis on the "what" of it all is the better strategy. It's not about pot. It's about the fact that smoking it at his age is illegal and could get all of you into legal trouble.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Great logic

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Fit-Dark-4062@reddit

Don't do what my parents did. Rehab at 16 for smoking a little weed isn't the way.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Who could afford that anyway?

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Feeling_Proposal_350@reddit

Three ways to change behavior.

Power-Coersive - ground him, take away his money, punish him and scale it up for future occurances.
Normative - get him involved in something where the peers don't. Sports are a good bet.
Cognitive-Educational - Proactively teach him why he shouldn't. What are the consequences? How is his developing brain hurt, whereas an adult brain is not. Find a few scientific study approaches and review them together.

All three is best. See work by Benne and Chin, but there is more out there.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Yep got it coach! He got a job Saturday!

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flaginorout@reddit

Yep. Been there.

Don't over react. A lot of kids do this. Most don't end up selling crack on street corners. All will be well. LOL.

When I caught my kid for the 9th time I calmly:

1- cut off money. If they have money for weed, they don't need money from me. If they got money from the grandparents, I immediately impounded it. But they were basically treated like a hostile country- 100% economic sanctions. Movies? No, suffer. New video game? No- suffer. Grab dinner at Arby's with friends? No, suffer. And I kept this up for 3-4 months.

Depends on each kid, but as long as he didn't slack with his responsibilities I wouldn't care if my son smoked weed. Hell, at that age I was already experimenting with WAY harder stuff and getting into much more serious trouble than smoking herb. I'd set boundaries like no smoking inside the house and to stay away from my weed, but you can't really stop them so you're better off just "regulating" it.

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housevil@reddit

OMG, this literally happened!

Unkindly-bread@reddit

Don’t do drugs that people end up sucking dicks for.

Feeling-Pea5281@reddit

When I was 12, my big sister told me that if I had a choice between alcohol and pot, pot was safer.

I looked at her solemnly, sincerely, and professed that I would NEVER do either of those things.

Mendonesiac@reddit

I wouldn't listen to any advice here. We don't know your kid, your rules, or your household.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

I will gorge a path that works for us for sure

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JEG1980s@reddit

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TeenNinjaTortoise@reddit

When I was in high school, we made pipes and bongs out of just about anything. Had a neighbor across the street (who is now an engineer) that figured out how to coil rubber tubing around the inside of an old cleaned out paint can, so you could fill the center with ice water and cool the smoke off for bigger hits. Kids aren't as dumb as you think.

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125acres@reddit

In stayed high a kid.

I had a 4 foot bong called old timber.

One time I took half pound of ditch weed and marinated two T-bone steaks. I was able to get half way through the steak.

I find it hard to believe kids are smoking leaf today over vape pens and edibles.

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peppermintmeow@reddit

Pop cans, apples, potatoes, 5 gallon paint buckets, tennis balls, vacuum cleaners. Kids are both dumber and smarter than we give them credit for.

They cannot be estimated. Especially when it comes to breaking the rules.

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AJKaleVeg@reddit

That sounds amazing!

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panic_bread@reddit

Why on earth is this unbelievable? Have you ever met any teenagers?

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125acres@reddit

I have two of them.

That seems like a more reasonable way to explain it, honestly. The fact OP used to do it is not an excuse the kid should be allowed to use. We used to do a lot of bad shit back in the day that we know to not do now.

The facts are the kid still lives in the house and if they forbid it and set it up to not be done in the home, the kids will just be better at hiding it. It's best to discuss the why of why it's not good for them.

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Mangolandia@reddit

Same

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PhotonWranglers@reddit

My wife and I agreed when ours were babies that when it came up, we wouldn’t lie about our usage. It came up when they were in middle school and their favorite rappers were all dying from Xanax. I had a very honest conversation with them which ended in asking them to promise me that when it came up, they’d come talk to me first. They kept that promise and true to my word, I went to the legal dispensary and got some lower THC, outdoor weed and we smoked together (he was 17). I know some will criticize, but they’re both in their 20’s and have what I would say is a health relationship with cannabis. Neither drink alcohol, which is a lot different than my 20’s, and are only occasional weed smokers. With all of the shit out there that will kill them, I’d rather them feel safe asking me about these things.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

Yes my mom gave it to me for menstrual cramps and we will do this but later - he is too young right now

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Alycion@reddit

Simple.

I’m not going to lie. I used it as a teen. But we didn’t know as much then as we do now. Remember, ashtrays were in delivery rooms for people giving birth back in those days.

I found out years later that he did continue to dabble with pot in high school from time to time but always stayed away from the other things. I always clarified I wasn't against pot as a whole but against it right now. Just like alcohol.

You can't completely prevent your kid from continuing but bringing the tone down on the drugs and up on the dishonesty may help.

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Moonflower621@reddit (OP)

This is the answer

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Better_Resort1171@reddit

This is your brain...

This is your brain on modern weed.

Any q's ?

gif

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oscarmadisonismessy@reddit

To be honest, I’d rather my kid use thc than alcohol. They are all adults and parents now but I always made myself available for them if they had questions. If they wanted to use pot, I told them to be responsible and know where it came from. This was way before the worry of fentanyl, so it’s scarier now. My mother in law raised my husband and his siblings with zero tolerance and they all rebelled, my sister in law died from alcohol poisoning. You can’t just say no to everything as a parent. There has to be some sort of balance and conversation. My grandchildren are little right now but I don’t envy the future my kids are facing, it’s tough out there.

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EagleEyes0001@reddit

Bro they going to keep doing it no matter how hard you try to stop it. Actually the harder you try the more they’ll double down. When I found out about my kids(4 yrs ago) we had a talk and I let their friends come over and they’d hangout in the garage. Safer than them going somewhere else and getting in trouble for it.

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patbagger@reddit

Did you smoke pot, I was very open about my drug usage and my children never expressed any interest in using.

Try not to be a hypocrite and remember either they're going to use or they're not and you can't stop them.

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Watch_Noob_72@reddit

What are "beginning" teen years here? 13? 14? When did you start?

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HandAccomplished6285@reddit

I’m sorry. This is a very serious topic, but I can’t be the only one whose mind went straight to the, I learned it from you Dad…” commercial, am I?

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DrumsKing@reddit

I told my teen, "Hey...(insert dangers speech), but if you must indulge a "drug"....at least avoid alcohol. Its the worst of the worst." And proceeded to explain the dangers of alcohol vs "weed".

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ntengineer@reddit

You could do this. Get his bong and some pot and when he gets home from school be smoking it using his bong on the couch or porch or something.

I remember at his age being motivated by the career I wanted. Everyone who smoked pot had low end jobs and were slow nimrods.

Let me state upfront: yes, cannabis is not great for the developing brain, and you should be concerned.

Having said that, as a fellow GenXer, I must inform you: everything you were taught about the dangers of cannabis is absolute bullshit.

They lied to us.

It is virtually impossible to OD from weed.

The “gateway drug hypothesis” is dubious at best.

https://www.publichealthontario.ca/-/media/documents/q/2019/qa-cannabis-gateway.pdf?sc_lang=en

As a parent myself, I am much more comfortable with my kids doing pot than booze.

Hell, I wish I could do pot instead of booze, but it makes me nauseated.

Do your research from non-US sources, which still promote puritanical bullshit.

Happy parenting.

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Friscogonewild@reddit

It's 2026, lol. We all know this. We're old, not stupid.

The dangers we know now are of its effect on memory in developing brains. And maybe you didn't hear, but more than half the U.S. population has access to legal weed, we're not all that puritanical. I have 3 pot shops within walking distance of my house.

Reddit is filled with studies from U.S. institutions on the actual effects of marijuana.

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RikkiLostMyNumber@reddit

While I don't agree with everything you've posted, I will point out that cannabis is far less harmful than alcohol. While I don't enjoy the image of one of my kids sky-high watching reruns of Spongebob, I prefer that to ab alcohol-sponsored car crash.
Kids are going to fuck around with getting altered. The vast majority of human at least try some substances. Education and communication are supremely important in these years.

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mitkase@reddit

Former step parent here, and yep, that was what I told my step daughter: I'd rather you smoke pot than drink or do other drugs. Just be responsible, and please don't lie to me so I can help you if you need it.

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Barthle@reddit

Alcohol is the true gateway drug. Think of the first time most people try something bad, it's usually when they're drunk.

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LiteraryPhantom@reddit

Mine was drinking alcohol. “Oh but its non-alcoholic and its in the soda aisle” says the other parent who bought and provided it.

Ok. Well, i want to see this soda aisle. Regardless tho, Coke, Pepsi, apple juice, water, none have “non-alcoholic on the label but they dont contain alcohol. Hmm. Why is that I wonder?

Then i say down with the kid and explained alcoholic, addict family history yadda yadda, which was much easier having laid groundwork for years prior (alcohol stunts brain growth blah blah blah).

The start of it (and when i first learned), I was invited to Thanksgiving dinner at a friends. So the two of us went. Out comes the bottle of “soda”. Hmm. Ok. So, navigators dont sleep, which helped make the 90 minute ride home miserable.

I dunno if any of that helps but i guess my point is, losing your cool and blowing up likely wont have the impact youre looking for.

If you were doing it in front of him and then telling him not to, then its that old after school commercial

“Father: Answer me! Whoooo taught you how to DO THIS?!… Son: You, alright!?! I learned it by watching YOU!… Voiceover: Parents who use drugs have children who use drugs”.

Youre not a hypocrite. Your have life experiences broader than the experiences of your parents, which you get to use to teach your kid better.

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Claque-2@reddit

How can your teen afford to smoke? Is this just an activity to do with their friends or do they feel better smoking? Is feeling better mental or physical?

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EnfantTerrible68@reddit

Good question. Where does a 13-14 year old get money for drugs?

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MyNetHandle@reddit

When my parents caught me smoking cigarettes, they sat me down and forced me to chain smoke a pack of 20 Woodbines (UK people will truly understand how horrid this would have been!) and it did the trick. I’d be tempted to get the so high they white out/throw up 7 nights running. Simple rule - don’t fuck with Gen X, especially if they are your parents!!

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ktappe@reddit

You're trying to shut the use down, which makes using all that much more attractive to a teenager.

Maybe the opposite tack would work--have a family "get high as fuck" night where you get him to do too much. After that it won't seem so interesting to him anymore.

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Endless_Patience3395@reddit

Normalize it. Teach them responsible use. Don’t make it a big deal. It’s better to know than to ostracize. Keep commutation open.

Let them you’ll be there no matter what.

Anything else will push them away. It’s better to know than to not. My question to you is when do you want to know?

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Canuck_75@reddit

1970’s teens???

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Charming-Insurance@reddit

Yeah that’s some math. Though I guess they could be 13 in 1979 and maybe be elder Gen Z?

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Advanced_Tax174@reddit

Get high with him.

The weed today - especially edibles is not like our olden days pot. So educate him on supply.

The legal stuff is regulated and you know what you’re getting, it’s packaged to avoid taking more than 10g at a time, but if it’s coming from a reserve or unregulated source the THC content can be ridiculously high and you don’t know if you’re getting India or sativa and you don’t know what else is in it. There can absolutely be things other than weed in there.

My kid is late teens and his group has had some pretty awful experiences ‘greening out’. There is also an increase in the amount of psychosis with the super high THC weed products. Especially with sativa products.

https://i.redd.it/u3cn9xe0kwqg1.gif

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Altruistic-Ad6449@reddit

Stahhhhhppppp

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Oxjrnine@reddit

Drag them to a homeless shelter and soup kitchen to volunteer. Kids don’t really care about risk to life, health, security…. But they are vain. A few toothless people who reek of piss and talk to the shadow people might stick.

And it wasn’t crack. It was meth. Even if they sold it as crack—meth is a cheap way to hide bad coke.

Cocaine is addictive but the high goes away quickly. Meth can affect you for days.

I was a functioning addict that did small amounts so it never affected my appearance or had repercussions so it was very difficult to stay clean. But then one day the shadow people started buzzing in my ear and that freaked me out to stop completely. And the meds that I had to take for 2 years to re wire my brain back to normal drained my emotions completely and it was worse than any depressive episode you could possibly imagine. But I escaped permanently damaging my brain, but just barely.

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InternationalRule138@reddit

I haven’t had to deal with this from my kids (yet) but I’d be tempted to have a very frank discussion about the stuff that is on the streets. I know someone that died after 1 pull from a joint - it was laced with fentanyl. This crap happens. His wife came home and found him dead, he was in an area with camera and she literally has a video of him light it, take one puff and die within minutes. If they are going to do it, I would make darn sure they know not to get it off the streets…it’s actually a major reason that I would like to see it legalized - we could then tax it and people would have a clean source for it…

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Grouchy-Engine1584@reddit

All you can really do is steer them toward goals that are incompatible with being a pothead. You can’t stop them from doing it, but you can help them shape it into a less than harmful part of their lives until, hopefully, they wise up and shut it down themselves.

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NvGable@reddit

Calendar-Careless@reddit

Ignore it and create a safe space for them to smoke.

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ziperhead944@reddit

If you make a big deal about it, theyre going to hide it. Because your making it seem important. Who knows how deep that rabbit hole is going to get.

Teens smoke pot. Always have always will. And drink, and have sex and listen to music you dont like.

HotIntroduction8049@reddit

my ex and I talked about it for our kids. she is straight and narrow. I eat a gummy at bedtim. would rather them experiment in a controlled environment with an adult in proximity. that does not mean either of us are ok with a kid getting baked all weekend long.

in canada its legal and lots of safe places to buy it, plus its super easy to grow.

I think any regular middle aged regular weed smoker with a decent job is going to have a steady and safe supplier, not from some dude on the street. I cannot forsee any of my chronic friends saying no to a joint for their friends kid.

Also my bestie came home to his 15 YO smoking weed in the house. He was more pissed at smoking in the house. Also we made the kid bring out his stash for a candid discussion and jeebiz fork, that was some shady shart. We had a long talk about quality and the issue of additions people can put in it. He got a soapbox full of weed chemistry and wtf people add to it.

kida are going to be exposed to it, curious about it, maybe pressured to smoke it. At least ensure they are making an educated choice. Fent does not forgive.

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Swimming_Bonus_8892@reddit

Yeah…you on it. I’m reading these comments it’s becoming glaringly obvious that it’s better to control it than let them figure it out with all that fent and shit on the street.

My wife is square bear I am the “experimenter supreme” lol

I hate to be one of those old fogeys that says back in my day but maaaaaaaaaan, you could buy damn near ANYTHING and it was good because if it sucked you might get your ass beat AND robbed for the money back. Now, these kids can’t even get back up to go fight the person that sold them dirty shit. It’s really a dangerous time y’all. Hug ya families and I hope we find a reasonable solution but for the time being I think id rather do what yiure saying than risk my child. Peace

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North-Country-5204@reddit

First time saw someone smoke pot on the bus was middle school in the 70s. Tried it a couple years later and hated it cuz it put me to sleep within 15 minutes. Now nearly 50 years later I now I like it cuz it puts me to sleep within 15 minutes.

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SupermarketSpecial58@reddit

Be cool. Listen to them. Explain your concerns. Validate their autonomy. Live your values. Trust them to be safe and make good decisions.

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anothercynic2112@reddit

So this is an open question discussion topic. I have a 15 yo and no weed scares yet. But regarding autonomy I'm torn. I feel like maybe he needs to warn that through responsible behavior. That doesn't mean not making mistakes or experimenting but I'll move aside as you show me you've got this . .

imbrotep@reddit

Well, I’d guess your parents wouldn’t have been too happy knowing you smoked weed, but had also done things in their early years which were not too bright. All kids do dumb things, and 99.9% of the time it turns out fine in the end.

My kid experimented with weed and alcohol in her teens. I expressed my disagreement with her using any intoxicants, as it could damage her developing brain, and she was already genetically predisposed to addiction. Also, if she were to be captured on video or in a photo, there could be serious consequences regarding school and her future prospects. Finally, I tried to stress how incredibly important it was for her to only partake with people she trusts completely as date-rapeBut I stressed even more that if she ever did use substances, I’d always be available to come get her no matter where or at what time, and that I would not judge her (but reserved the right to lecture once she’d sobered up).

The two biggest differences today are the potency of the weed and cellphone cameras/social media. When we were kids, almost nothing ever made it to film, and there was no widely available digital photography or video. Now, one picture, if it gets out, can ruin a kid’s future.

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Competitive_Ice_2219@reddit

I moved to Singapore and raised my daughter. No problems with drugs.

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MundaneHuckleberry58@reddit

I mean. Where I live it’s legal (recreationally & medically). You walk through vape smoke on your way down any sidewalk or going in a store. It’s hard to justify to savvy kids that it’s unacceptable, when it’s so very in the open here.

For me it’s a discussion of responsible use & risks/benefits.

I pressed into my kids' head that everybody knows that weed isn't really that dangerous itself, but the fact that it is illegal (yes, it is still illegal everywhere in the US) and especially illegal for minors means that it is very easy to end up intersecting with the criminal justice system, which can absolutely wreck the rest of your life.

MarcusAurelius68@reddit

Getting Cat’s in the Cradle vibes…

I did all sorts of stupid things in college, and when driving my son to his first day I just said “I trust you, I know you’re going to have fun…just don’t do anything that gets you arrested, hospitalized or makes you a father. Anything else you can survive. Keep your focus on where you want to end up (in his case, med school)”

I saw him today with a new eyebrow piercing. Not my thing but I’m old dad now.

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-GTX@reddit

Time to beat some ass

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

That's good parenting? Welcome to the 21at century. Most have learned that physical violence only created future abusers.

A legacy to be proud of.

The sentiment alone is violent.

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Free_Solid9833@reddit

I don't know how much this will help, but we live in Portland and weed is everywhere. Most of the kids don't seem to bother with it, maybe because there's no rebellion to it, I have no idea. But it's possible that taking away the rebellion will help? Do what you want, it's your time and brain to waste but don't say I didn't warn you?

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

I see the same thing. Weed is not nearly as popular with the kids as alcohol. And frankly, people are way less dangerous when drunk vs stoned. I'll take an alley full of stoners LONG before an alley full of drunks.

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bja33470@reddit

also - much of the pot they get now is way stronger than that shit you smoked back in the day - they need to wait a bit but now the door is open so they probably just need to be taught to be ultra responsible with it - they shouldn't be doing it at all that age but sounds like it's too late

you'd have to go all hard-core and piss test them every week and have consequences for not passing - probably just cause more animosity and trouble than it's worth

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mysideofstreetclean@reddit

Weed today is a lot different than when I was a teenager in the 70s and 80s. You’re not being hypocritical by telling him not to smoke something that may have been tampered with. We understand so much more about the effects of weed on adolescent brain development now.

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drowning_in_cats@reddit

This… weed laced with horrible chemicals from China is not an insignificant risk

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

Now or in the 70s? If you buy weed off the street, then whatever, your bad. Hit a dang dispensary. Grow your own if it's legal. Just be factual.

Nowhere have I see "Chinese weed" for sale. Nowhere.

I'm more worried about the chimicles used in Chinese textiles.

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Extreme_Barracuda658@reddit

Unless it was dipped in PCP.

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KittyTB12@reddit

The stuff they’re smoking these days, I wouldn’t touch it. People say it’s not addicting, but I disagree. I have seen too many people go through withdrawal symptoms from not smoking pot and they get to the point where all they do is smoke pot from morning tonight there’s no way the stuff that we smoked when we were growing up is anywhere near the stuff that they’re smoking now I mean come on in Southern California. It was Mexican dirt weed or red hair or skunk from Hawaii. there was some big huge thing some Maui Powie from Hawaii, but I’m telling you the stuff today I could smell it and I swear I get high from it. I am very anti-420 anybody anything? I’m sorry I used to not be but living here where I’m at and all of these pothead running around I’ve seen way too much of it to even think that it’s a good thing. The only exception being people that have true medicinal need such as stage for cancer and it’s making their end of days easier and people with glaucoma I believe that it truly helps people with glaucoma, but other than that, these people are just out here to get high. I’m sorry for ranting. Have a good day.

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

If you've never touched it, how do you know? To me, higher potency means I need to smoke less.

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Distinct-Olive-7145@reddit

...in my state, if it's sold in a dispensary it was grown here. No imported weed allowed or necessary. And it's never tainted, I can buy organic, and I know exactly what I'm getting.

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My kid is 20, and this is what my policy boiled down to:

I'd rather you didn't drink, and I'd rather you didn't use pot, but you're a teenager and you're going to do what you do so here are the rules. Be safe. Take it slow, and don't overdo it. Always be with someone you trust. Never get into a vehicle with someone who's had even one drink or one hit of any drug. Call me, I will come and get you and all your friends. I will not be mad at you. You will not be punished. But we will talk about it. We will repeat all the conversations we've already had about why you should wait and the effect of alcohol and drugs on young brains. If you drink too much and you're hungover the next day, I'll give you Tylenol and make sure you hydrate but expect to be getting up and going about your day as normal, no matter how shitty you feel, because that's what adults have to do and if you're going to take part in an adult activity, you'll be treated like an adult in the aftermath.

I've also been very honest with him about what I did or didn't do as a teen (I didn't start drinking until I was 18, a year before legal age, and I tried pot once and didn't like it so my advice on pot was more about my friends who did it), good experiences and bad. And we had talks about this when he was very young, like 10, because that's when pot was legalized here so when he asked "what's that smell" as we were walking past a bar with people standing outside smoking, I took that as my opportunity to start the conversation. I'm a big fan of "don't protect your kid from the world, prepare them for it".

The result of this was that my kid was honest with me when he had his first drink (at 17) and the first time he tried pot (at 19). For reference, the legal age for both is 19 where I live. He didn't do a lot of partying, but he'd tell me if he might be drinking at a party or with friends. I don't think he's ever been hungover, so he seems to have taken my advice seriously to nurse his drinks and quit while he's still in the "happy buzzed" stage. He's not a big fan of pot so that's also only an occasional thing.

So, be honest about why you don't want him doing this until he's older, and talk to him about safety and moderation. For himself and his friends.

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sil0@reddit

Good approach and one we had to deal with our youngest son as well. The younger one is extremely straight edge. I had the same talk with him and spoke about the well-researched area in neuroscience. The short answer: adolescent brains are uniquely vulnerable to cannabis in ways adult brains are not.

Long answer:

Structural brain changes Regular teen cannabis use is associated with reduced gray matter volume, particularly in the prefrontal cortex and hippocampus. These changes have been observed on MRI and are not seen to the same degree in adults who start later.

Memory and learning impairment The hippocampus is heavily involved in forming new memories. THC disrupts this process acutely, and with regular use, deficits in verbal memory and information processing can persist — sometimes for years after stopping.

IQ and cognitive decline The Dunedin longitudinal study (New Zealand) found that people who started heavy cannabis use as teens lost an average of 8 IQ points by midlife, even after quitting. Adults who started later showed no comparable decline.

Psychosis and schizophrenia risk This is one of the more serious findings. Teen cannabis use — especially high-potency THC products — significantly increases the risk of psychotic disorders, particularly in individuals with a genetic predisposition. High-THC concentrates (wax, shatter, dabs) amplify this risk considerably.

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dubious455H013@reddit

While agree with most of that. But if my kid ever was in where theres no safe ride out. Id drop what ever I was doing and go get them no questions asked or repercussions

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KindaKrayz222@reddit

gif

Time for an honest conversation. Non-judgemental, chill.. Just.. Facts, etc.

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Septemberosebud@reddit

Kids are gonna get high. Me too.

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jcpham@reddit

So the bong. At one point as adults myself and my brothers had this thing for gravity bongs.

Firstly they are efficient versus other types of flower smoking devices. Secondly yeah they can be disassembled and tossed if necessary.

The gallon jug is slightly concerning because we only had one gallon jug gravity bong known affectionately as “the busket”

The busket was a one gallon chamber with a bowl on top that went inside a five gallon bucket of water.

Me too I was like....

gif

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Ecjg2010@reddit

Is he fucking up? How old is he? Im in this situation with my kid, but she is almost 16 and holding a 3.77 GPA. So I told her not to fuck it ip. That i know she id going to experiment. Im not dumb. Just be careful, dont ride in a car (none of her friends drive) and dont fuck up her grades.

So far, she hasn't.

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Bromodrosis@reddit

This is what we did. We both knew drinking and smoking were going to happen and we met it head on with DIRE punishment if either of them drank and drove or got in the car with anyone who was.

We told them we would come pick them up (almost) anywhere with no questions asked.

Once we demystified drinking, the rest flowed easily. I've never made any bones about smoking weed in my younger days, so the table was open for questions. None came.

It's not my preferred choice, but I'd rather them feel safe and know they can call us if anything goes pear-shaped than have to sneak around like we did. It gives then another avenue to earn trust/responsibility and gives us some security and honesty at a time when parents don't get the whole picture.

My step-son is in an honors college in a top 25 university and my step daughter says she isn't going to drink.

Obviously, YMMV. Good luck, OP.

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PeterPunksNip@reddit

It's also because of this kind of possibility that I refuse to have or be in charge of kids. I never stepped to the other side, and have no authority... I'll end up smoking with them instead of going "drugs are bad, m'kay ?". Anyway, it's just weed. Just lecture them about short term memory damage and risks of psychosis if they abuse it . Advise them to only indulge in it on the weekend if they don't want to have a bad time memorising stuff and have bad grades.

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Tech-Mechanic@reddit

They know mom and dad smoked as 70’s teens into adulthood

I was going to say you should just stop trying to even discipline this, because no stoner in the history of anything has ever stopped smoking dope just because their parents tell them to. But, the above quote clinches it.

Kids/Teens are kids. It's like when the first fell off a bike; if you don't freak out, they won't freak out.

Open and honest communication with no judging worked for us. It didn't stop our kids from partying but they do make good decisions.

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Historical-Fish-1665@reddit

Well first I'd sample it to check the quality and determine potency.

Then I'd probably put on some tunes - say some Willie Colon? - Crime Pays is a smooth album of his, or some Hector Lavoe, yeah Un Amor De La Calle, and that one asks for a little cha cha cha - yeah then I'd fire up the flat iron, whip up some macadamia pesto encrusted mahi mahi, some mango jalapeno tartar sauce, a nice salad of avocado, heirloom tomatoes, baby romaine, fresh cracked pepper, with a light vinaigrette, with say a side of Parmesan crusted roast purple Peruvian potates for the kid and myself.

What were we talking about? Oh yeah weed. Well I'd explain life is what happens while we're busy making other plans, and that the Bible says man's opinions are fit for the garbage, that operating machinery or driving while high is a really bad idea, but practicing a musical instrument or just chilling out occasionally to unwind is pretty much acceptable and that a hydrator is far superior and safer than smoking the stuff.

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Interesting_Match925@reddit

If I could go back in time and only change one thing, it would be this. I didn’t do enough to keep my loved one safe. For those with a family history/propensity, cannabis use can contribute to a Schizophrenia diagnosis. You DO NOT want this!

https://www.reddit.com/r/psychology/s/1i9JxOvWQE

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iyamsnail@reddit

Can concur: this happened to a family friend and it's been an absolute nightmare/tragedy for the entire family

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Yourmomsgotanass@reddit

If they're keeping 1gal bongs in their bedroom I think you're cooked. Teach them a skill and have them grow their own.

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ZuBrain@reddit

... My adhd keeps circling back to "70's teens" & I'm having trouble reading the whole thing ... 🤣

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stueynz@reddit

Born ‘65 is 13 in ‘78 so possibly genuinely gen-X with being ‘70s teen.

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awrythings@reddit

Are they meeting other responsibilities? If so I’d let it go. My oldest was pretty open about it, got great grades, and worked a job so we never had much of a discussion beyond me telling him “it’s better than drinking”. Daughter snuck around, didn’t perform well at school (did hold down a job however), and had anxiety/adhd. She required a long talk and meeting with pediatrician about self medicating and possible side effects. Worked for him and not for her. Talk with them

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PallyCecil@reddit

This 100% When I was in high school I was a regular user, but I also maintained a 3.75 GPA throughout. I was honest with my parents about it and everything worked out ok. The main deterrent is love, openness, and education. Tell them you love them and remind them that the friendships they make around drugs and alcohol are probably not meaningful.

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BlueAndMoreBlue@reddit

That’s what my parents did for me in the late eighties when they found my stash, sort of. They said that a lot of people smoked pot and as long as I had a job, met my responsibilities (school band, Boy Scouts, etc) and didn’t keep it in the house then they didn’t have a problem.

My parents would've beaten my ass... This I didn't smoke anything til I was 18.

Can't help ya out much but good for you for being understanding. Your kids don't know how lucky they have it.

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cascadianpatriot@reddit

I mean, if grades aren’t slipping or nothing else is happening there isn’t much to worry about. Using a plastic jug for a bong is dangerous. If she’s 13, that’s not a good age. But they’ll smoke whether you let them or not. So I’d try to be adult about it, and hopefully she will too. Don’t let her use a plastic jug for a bong though. It’s a treat. Drugs and sex are the mayo and mustard on the sandwich of life. If all you have is mustard and mayo on your sandwich, it’s going to suck.

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yarn_slinger@reddit

I’m almost 60 and my kid is in uni. Both hubby and I partook to some extent as kids, but have both stopped recreational use and drinking (not due to abuse just aging). Kid didn’t try pot until she was “legal” (it’s legal here at 19) and she doesn’t drink. She hit the bong pretty often for a while, and we kept an eye on her usage and made it clear that we didn’t disapprove but wanted her to be honest about it. She’s recently quit entirely. Have a chat with your kid and make sure they understand your concerns.

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cdiddy579@reddit

I learned it from watching you, dad.

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johnnysugar162@reddit

This made me laugh way too hard! I had completely forgotten about that one.

“Parents who smoke pot have kids who smoke pot.”

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DJErikD@reddit

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FnEddieDingle@reddit

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You tell them you don't want them doing that and hope they respect you enough to not be doing that. You set out consequences so they understand the stakes. Then you play dumb and hope they hide it better.

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hkusp45css@reddit

This is my current playbook.

He came to us and told us he'd been experimenting. We discussed it, I told him that I have to insist that he stop. The law and the consequences are just too high in our state.

I hope he heard me.

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hellhouseblonde@reddit

I’d start by asking what they’re trying to accomplish or what benefit they’re feeling from it. Then I’d start therapy and possibly meds if they’re self medicating. Drugs are so popular because they’re effective. I saw a trauma-addiction expert say that and it hit home.

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Full_Mission7183@reddit

Plead with them for their well being, but I know when I was a kid there was no way for me to understand how many "other" days were going to be available to me to smoke or drink or do those things.

They're young they don't know that tedium is coming for them, and you need drugs for the tedium.

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hkusp45css@reddit

I instinctively recoiled at this message, but ion reflection, I can co-sign this.

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agonypants@reddit

I'm a GenX'er who grew up with uncles with severe drug problems and prison, etc. Here's what I said to my teenager when having the "drug talk" with her after she found my good time gummies:

There are certain drugs that you should never touch:
Coke, heroin, methamphetamine, opioids, etc.
Cannabis isn't entirely without harm. I have known multiple people who have wrecked their lives over weed.
If your brain is fully developed and if you're capable of using cannabis responsibly, then it can be both fun and beneficial - but caution should be exercised so as not to harm your development, your education or job prospects.

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infinitynull@reddit

Here's a really excellent drug talk:

Optimal-Band-7065@reddit

You didn’t smoke pot and you say you’re GenX?🧐. Can’t condone it, can’t stop it. Best you can probably do is share your issues/concerns, tell them not in my house and if they get jammed up well….sorry for the run-on sentence, bit buzzed myself.

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Glittering_Watch5565@reddit

So it was OK for you as a teen but not your kid?

Makes you a hypocrite don't ya think?

As you should remeber, your parents couldn't stop you..... so what makes you think this is going to go any different? Want more lies? Want them experimenting with other substances? Then try stopping them and have all those arguments again from the other side.

Or make peace with it as part of growing up for a lot of people and set rules and boundaries. Be smarter than our parents generation.

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BillSkinner@reddit

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Chickensrock1977@reddit

FYI, there is such a thing as thc drug test strips if you want to go that route.