BALKANERS: Do you agree that we have some of the most brutal ways of swearing?

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Fred_Neecheh@reddit

May a canine copulate with your entire first row at your funeral, e. g.

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marosszeki@reddit

I beg you to type this in Serbian as well. I wanna learn it

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aleks8134@reddit

Jeb’o ti pas ceo prvi red familije na sahrani.

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DebtCollectorForMami@reddit

Is that a real saying because that’s crazy 😂🫨

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Zabrinuti_gradjanin@reddit

Well, yes and no. It is basically two sayings combined.

One is "dog fucked you", which has variety of improvemebts such as "dog fucked your mother" and so on.

I fucked your first row on funeral, is the other one, so you can see how we get there.

Keep in mind that our swears are typically possible to chain together, for example, my favorite mix is "I, the dog, have fucked your mother" like I first down-graded myself to dog, just so it is worse when I jave fucked your mother.

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icy_guy26@reddit

lmao your comment made my day

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01101010001010@reddit

We learn from each other, and we learn only the important things

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Zabrinuti_gradjanin@reddit

True balkan love!

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Own_Organization156@reddit

Yes it is

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KapetannZaspan@reddit

hahahahh jebeno :D

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aleks8134@reddit

It is. Also, a dog can fuck them, you can fuck them, devil can fuck them. Basically it’s a ___ and you can write whoever want to fuck them.

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DebtCollectorForMami@reddit

Very kind to keep the invitation open

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DraculaTickles@reddit

Can my dog fuck your dog while he is fucking the entire ro...
I thought it's an open invitation, you said...

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TheAp4ch3@reddit

You can even fuck Tito!

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alex_zk@reddit

Creating new ways to swear is an art around here and we’re very well versed in it

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CamperKuzey@reddit

Saving to use again a Croatian homosexual I play league with

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whodarezwinzz@reddit

O jebem ti vagon žita zrno po zrno, a na svakom zrnu tri pičke matere, ne znam kad sam se ovako dobro nasmijao 😂😂

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LXXXVI@reddit

I will thank you for the laugh you've provided for me, good sir!

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PavelKringa55@reddit

Ma zvaci bre pesak.

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nvlajic@reddit

Sa'rani?

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JuniorEgg2@reddit

🤣 On an equal note, may I shove a penis in your mother’s funeral cake, etc.

Truly we are poets!

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chipishor@reddit

And that etc includes her church, her god and her cross

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JuniorEgg2@reddit

I had real difficulty explaining to my other half the concept of “colivă” and then …erm… you know, doing stuff to it. Sexual stuff. She still is in awe of our swear words.

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Belt-Helpful@reddit

Like warm apple pie...

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MikyD77@reddit

You can draw a parallel with the movie “ American pie” wich was about having sex with pastry.

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TheWalrusResplendent@reddit

Oh, not just the funeral cake.
The baptismal font, the incense burner thurible, each and every day of Easter, every iteration of Christ, the communion bread and the onions.

If your SO is an anglophone, inform her that we also have an equivalent to "giving someone a case of summer teeth", under the form of the threat "You feeling too warm with all those teeth in your mouth?"

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fk_censors@reddit

This guy curses.

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MikyD77@reddit

And her onion.

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Odd_Workings101@reddit

Also sexually abusing one's dead ancestors...

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MikyD77@reddit

Italians do that too. Latin power!

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DoolioArt@reddit

who are also their children. in the mouth. while they're decaying. that's like a mild remark you'll hear in a very mild exchange between a clerk and a customer that doesn't even go into any further exchange.

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ComfortableApricot36@reddit

Oh? Lets not forget " I'll drag my balls on your dead mothers grave"

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Big-Branch-3643@reddit

My favorite in this category is: “I’ll shove my dick in your grandfather’s funeral cake, so that my balls will jump from candy to candy!”

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Peter_Pornker@reddit

May a soup made of Jesus’ bones be copulated with. (Jebemu juhu od Isusovi košćic)

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Bla_Bla_Blanket@reddit

De prevodi, ne razumijem na engleskim koji je ovo cuss word 😂

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Hot_Sandwich8935@reddit

There's some pent up anger behind that. And we are angry people in this area.

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sayinmer@reddit

this isn’t swearing, this is art

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Dry_Satisfaction3923@reddit

Is this not just how we greet each other? Far too casual to be considered actual swearing.

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randompersononplanet@reddit

The amount of times a dog has fucked the family, ass, and everything else that our household items possess, is uncountable XDXDXD

Gotta be creative.

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Queasy_Birthday_890@reddit

Hahaha fuck I love Serbia!

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deckard3232@reddit

How would one say that in Serbian?

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Immediate_Safety_131@reddit

Thats truly creative!

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f00dot@reddit

The phrasing remind me of that wine the pooh meme where he's in a suit at the bottom

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BogdanD@reddit

I bounce my nuts off the candies on your funeral cake 💀

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Upstairs-Ad6316@reddit

May i make skis from you mothers coffin, is one of my favorites

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Budget-Community-982@reddit

You can't make skis out of a coffin, better make a bobsled.

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haikusbot@reddit

May i make skis from

You mothers coffin, is one

Of my favorites

- Upstairs-Ad6316

^(I detect haikus. And sometimes, successfully.) ^Learn more about me.

^(Opt out of replies: "haikusbot opt out" | Delete my comment: "haikusbot delete")

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Lucky_View3254@reddit

flowers on my dick and bees all around

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Careful-Evening-5187@reddit

Words are fine, but the hand gestures that go along with them really seal the deal.

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Cinar-2014@reddit

Yup

gif

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kostasnotkolsas@reddit

"May your mother find you cold"

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unwithered_lobelia@reddit

And "fuck Virgin Mary" that ends up censored in various ways

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XenophonSoulis@reddit

Panachaiki (a football club whose name has the same beginning as Panagia, the Virgin Mary) ends up getting a lot of the action.

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Beneficial_Pea_3981@reddit

My grandpa's favourite swear words toned down alternatives was fuck your panachaiki and Christopher Columbus

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XenophonSoulis@reddit

A friend of mine has invented "fuck your Panachaiki of Trikala".

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puzzledpanther@reddit

I'll never get tired of seeing Giannis saying "Gamo ti panagia sou gamo!" on the NBA courts.

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narisha_dogho@reddit

Not just Mary, but also your Christ, your God, your house, whatever you have (and not have!) and whatever comes to mind at that moment 😂

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GalaxzIsTiredAf@reddit

I love Greek swearing it's so funny especially since I'm not really good at it myself

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unwithered_lobelia@reddit

Yep, exactly

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XplosivDiarheaEnjoer@reddit

Well virgin mary in greek would literally translate to all saint (panagia = "Παναγία") ... We usually cut it short at the all part (pana, πάνα)

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unwithered_lobelia@reddit

Yeah, occasionally I've seen used "panagiota" which is a fairly common feminine name

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PeePeeBoy-NaughtyGR@reddit

Fuck your diaper! 🤣

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NoHawk668@reddit

"May your mother recognise you in pljeskavica"

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MikyD77@reddit

That a quote from Hannibal Lecterovic?

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NoHawk668@reddit

Lecta for friends, Hano for the family.

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MikyD77@reddit

-Hane were did you get this slănina?

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CriticalHistoryGreek@reddit

I've heard it with parizer and sometimes even use it in Greek.

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pelfet@reddit

this made me hungry though

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RasputinXXX@reddit

Bloody hell thats disturbing.

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Orqee@reddit

Not as much as “ may your firstborn had 10 fingers but no arms”

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Fourteen14XIV@reddit

OMG, it reminded me of another one:

"May your mother kiss your cold forehead."

There is also another, but less disturbing one:

May everyone in your house cry, but only the priest sing.

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kostasnotkolsas@reddit

It's a twist on the typical "kill yourself", you add a man's mother when you want to make it extra personal

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sakurakuran93@reddit

The epic one “fuck the pussy that gave birth to you”

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Aerachna_Van_Naegrel@reddit

Πρώτη φορά το ακούω, να είμαι ειλικρινής

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kostasnotkolsas@reddit

Όντως; Το "Να σε βρουν παγωμένο", "να σε βρει η μάνα σου κρύο" παίζει πολυ

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XenophonSoulis@reddit

Ούτε εγώ το έχω ξανακούσει, αλλά μπορεί να εξαρτάται από την τοποθεσία κλπ

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Aerachna_Van_Naegrel@reddit

Ναι, άνετα να μην το λενε στα Επτάνησα

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XenophonSoulis@reddit

Εγώ Αθήνα είμαι και δεν το έχω ακούσει πάντως

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gooddaytoyousir@reddit

May your mother *kiss you cold.

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Liberosis310@reddit

That's... 💀💀💀💀

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lif3line88@reddit

“jebem li vam devet kolena kako unapred tako i unazad sve do cukunaskurdzela, majku vam jebem te vam jebem majku” 🔥

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Ja_jebem_ti_mater@reddit

Jebacu ti sunce iz neba

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Worried-Owl-9198@reddit

I once heard a swear word in Turkish like I ll fuck the callus on your father's foot LMAo

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

“I wish god would take my life so I can fuck your ancestors” is my favorite.

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King_Glorius_too@reddit

Damn, we in France need to step up. We do have some decent stuff - a common one roughly translates to "Your grandmother is the queen of whores" - but obviously we have much to learn

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

This is just scratching the surface, Turkish has an incredible vocabulary, flexibility, and creativity when it comes to swearing.

There are great Turkish proverbs full of swears like:

“don’t be sorry for the orphan, he’ll come around and hit you in the ass” > Someone’s personal problems shouldn’t affect how you interact with them.
“the one who never saw another’s dick thinks he carries an axe handle” > Your skills may not be that good compared to others
“they didn’t fuck the ugly one, she went around saying she is virtuous” > You cannot be sure of your virtues until they are tested
“don’t let my ayran spill, don’t get my ass f’d” > Have your cake and eat it
“bunny puts its dick in a stone and said I f’d the mountain” > Small successes doesn’t mean victory
“If you don’t know how your ass will handle it, don’t drink pickle juice.” > Don’t bite off more than you can chew.
“I’m telling my troubles to the judge, and he’s just waving his dick at me.” > Don’t trust the people in power to care about your problems
“if the pussy is ready the dick will come from Baghdad” or “when your ass is out of your shorts the dick will come from Baghdad” > If something is going to happen, it will happen.
“if I say my dick is a cucumber you will run here with a salt shaker” > When someone is overly eager, shameless, or too ready
“if the imam farts, the congregation will poop” > People follow the leaders, good or bad.
“if you fuck the maid you wash your own dishes” > If you get involved in something inappropriate you’ll end up dealing with the consequences.

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ugrasergun@reddit

I also want to add a few.
* Unlucky Bedoin is fucked by a polar bear in the desert. -> You use it when someone has a series of bad luck happen to them.
* To fuck an ant without hurting its back -> To complete a task very meticulously.
* We fucked all the birds except storks (You have to use a sarcastic tone for this) -> You use it when someone focuses on some minute detail when there are much larger problems.
* You can't open an umbrella which entered in your ass -> We are fucked, and it's too late.

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harderdaddykermit@reddit

Hiç birini duymadım Türkçeleri ne?

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echo_c1@reddit

These are great examples but they are not swear words, but idioms and phrases. Swear words have similar –if not more– creativity too.

Some of those: - I’m gonna fuck your pussy from your asshole. - I’m gonna fuck your mother so good, your father will applaud. - I will build a swing on your mom’s pussy and fuck your grandparents swinging on it.

But my favourite is when you degrade the person to a simple object, in most cases to something they wear: like sunglasses or shoes. (Ne bakıyon lan iskarpin!)

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Proof-Ad62@reddit

Holy crap those are VERY creative! 😮😳😁

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No-Variation-2782@reddit

We have the one about cucumbers and salt shakers in Greece! Maybe we're just all too excited for tzatziki

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

The best I have ever heard was the following

!"go lick some bloody vaginal belch you shitface cockmaster"!<

But it was said by an american /s

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nicubunu@reddit

That's quite harmless

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

In contrast to what?

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nicubunu@reddit

In contrast with the average Balkan swearing

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

I was expecting an example of a harmful swearing.

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nicubunu@reddit

The thread is full with such examples

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

I didn't see any harmful ones.

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Orqee@reddit

How about “ May your mother searched for your dead body in the river with a rusty hook”

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

That's not even funny

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No-Specialist-1435@reddit

This is like kindergarden level insults on the balkans.

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

I disagree

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tenmilliongobble@reddit

*fuck your dead ancestors.

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Standard-Pepper-6510@reddit

*on your mother's side of the family preferably

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Pale_Adhesiveness981@reddit

I see you’re a man of culture…

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_AmericanByChoice_@reddit

Şahsen benim rekorum "uğruna şehit düşmüşlerin kemiklerine döl akıtayım."

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MajesticPineapple618@reddit

I speak Turkish and have never heard those . What are they in Turkish.

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JealousCommunity6993@reddit

Vay babanun kemiklerine

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Worried-Owl-9198@reddit

Oha djdkkf

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Rich_Plant2501@reddit

About Turkish swear words, in Bosnia and Herzegovina, Montenegro and Serbia (I don't know about other Balkan countries), siktir is a normal, rude but not vulgar word to tell someone to go away. Sikter coffee is a coffee that you make for your guests that are staying too long.

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ohgoditsdoddy@reddit

Well it’s no different in Turkey. Rude, like “fuck off” or GTFO. No one uses “siktir (lan)”, “has siktir” or “siktir git” to actually insult someone. :)

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rmzn_123@reddit

As a turkish i fucking died while laughing to “sikter coffee” it’s like okay,here is your coffee drink it quick and get the fuck outta here

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MikyD77@reddit

The antidote to the” Armenian visit”.

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Urkemanijak@reddit

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VolatileAnalysis4829@reddit

Same in Romania. It's "sictir" usually used in the phrase "Hai, sictir!" = go away, leave etc

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Relevant_Country_784@reddit

Si la fel e si in franceza: "parce que, parce que, des piacette des unires.... hai sictir in pizda ma-tii!"

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Alex_Wats@reddit

Pizda sounds exactly the same in Russian and means twat

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MikyD77@reddit

Go figure dick is in Latin , pussy is Slavic but the ass is the only one original.

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Hot_Sandwich8935@reddit

:)) fraier de ce am râs la asta

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fk_censors@reddit

It's more like "fuck off" in Romanian, mildly vulgar

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aserty67@reddit

Oh, I once had a romanian guest who helled that phrase at the top of her lungs in the middle at a nice restaurant in Istanbul. It was horrible.

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AST360@reddit

is seen as an equivalent to "fuck" in Turkey.

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guramika@reddit

No joke, I heard in counter strike 1.6 server around a decade ago 'I WALKED ON YOUR MOTHERS VAGINA WITH SPERM DRENCHED SANDALS'

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SlavicRobot_@reddit

I actually laughed out loud at that one

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_AmericanByChoice_@reddit

Şahsen benim rekorum "uğruna şehit düşmüşlerin kemiklerine döl akıtayım" ve "Kabe'nin gölgesinde babanın viagra verilmiş Devlet Bahçeli'ye siktirteyim."

Daha tabu kırıcı combolar aklıma gelmiyor.

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Worried-Owl-9198@reddit

Sil bence bu kadar fazla hoş değil

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DebtCollectorForMami@reddit

Hella creative

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Think-Horse83@reddit

Damn...

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CockamouseGoesWee@reddit

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Square-Objective2420@reddit

Maaa Jebo te otac jebo te dajdza Jebem ti zvaje Mrs u picku materinu sve vam jebem jebo vas hjeb Jebo vas bozic jebo te bog allah christo pusi mi Kira jebem ti cijelu porodicu mrtvu/ zivu i zdravu

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Playful-Alfalfa5729@reddit

"I shall pour yoghurt to your mother's pussy and then fuck her until it turns to ayran"

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PutAlternative7140@reddit

Vay aq sadece ben biliyorum sanıyodum

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spamgspam@reddit

ne yazıyordu silmiş çok merak ettim lütfen söyle

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PutAlternative7140@reddit

Ananın amına yoğurt döküp ayran olana kadar sikerim

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Orqee@reddit

That’s some serious hidden goat simbolism

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baron_spaghetti@reddit

gif

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ImpactX1244@reddit

so true i have a friend that went to the Qaaba once (i think it's pronounced like this I'm not a native English speaker) but he still curses God like ten times a day 24/7 lmao

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Ben10-fan-525@reddit

Serbia is a nation full of legendary swear words.

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5cozi@reddit

Romanian ones are one of a kind, a form of art.

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da_real007n7@reddit

I absolutely agree 🥹✌️✌️

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Vassago_@reddit

We don't omit anyone or anything. Relatives(dead or alive), saints, God. In the most creative ways. Truly a work of art. :))

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celBanat@reddit

And Turks ofc

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Aggressive-Fix7137@reddit

De acord

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fuckitsayit@reddit

If you transcribed my dad watching football and translated it to english, then tried to publish it in america, they'd probably arrest you

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da_real007n7@reddit

HELP WJAG

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salchichoner@reddit

I heard from a Spanish guy once: "I hope one day you have to do gargles with your mother's period."

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da_real007n7@reddit

I'M GIGGLING WHAT

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MiserableWeird3975@reddit

As a Spaniard, that one is a rare piece of literature. But there's one almost everyone uses and it's "me cago en todos tus muertos" which means "I will take a shit on every dead relative of yours"

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prehistoric_monster@reddit

Excuse me what?

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VigilanteRabbit@reddit

You haven't heard swearing until you sat next to a bunch of 50+ year old people playing cards (in the balkans) and drinking.

Those who know, know.

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da_real007n7@reddit

As a Romanian, I must say my parents are those people and I am 1* so I know many swear words 🥹✌️

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Vast-Honey7832@reddit

So it's in Italy

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baron_spaghetti@reddit

So many nasty things happening to mothers, their genitals, underwear, various religious accoutrements, and general filth.

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VigilanteRabbit@reddit

All within a single round that lasts only a few minutes; no less

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Radashin_@reddit

Or those same people fishing and fish gets away.

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Lu_CtheHorrible@reddit

Dao Bog da umirao, a ne mogao umrijeti Rough translation: may God make it so you're dying but unable to die

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da_real007n7@reddit

I always use "bagamias pula" or "sati moara familia si rasa mati"

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Serious_Lemon_7884@reddit

I’ll pour cement in your mom’s cunt, build a house on it, get on the roof freedive into her asshole.

Sounds structurally sound no?

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PitifulGarlic6352@reddit

I fuck to you the blood of the young stork (jebem ti krv mlade rode)

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

I wonder what the reaction would be if I told a Japanese guy “I wish god would take my life so I can fuck your ancestors”.

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Aldegeraz@reddit

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wololowhat@reddit

He's invited

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yenilmezodtr@reddit

Knk bi çevir şunu şuan aklıma gelmedi sorry

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Leibwatchter@reddit

Allah canımı alsa da ölmüşlerini siksem

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Polka_Tiger@reddit

Bu ne ya hayal edemedim?

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Andrei_29@reddit

I knew some Japanesse girls, the reaction is usualy laughing loudly, then trying to repear proudly.

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Ill_Anybody4309@reddit

gif

This.

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pronte89@reddit

Heh sweet summer children come and google "bestemmia"

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otterform@reddit

Che ti venga un cancro al buco del culo

May you get cancer in your arsehole A favorite when road racing

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Vast-Honey7832@reddit

La cagna bastarda di tua madre inculata da 40 cani malati

That bitch of your mother fucked in the ass by 40 ill dogs, you can substitute dogs with what you like. Every morning traffic

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Commercial_Leek6987@reddit

What? No shitting in your father’s bowl?

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Own_Organization156@reddit

Laže ko pas jebem mu boga vidi se da je grk kao ostatak svoje porodice znaš da je pederčina teška

So yea i agree (this up there is ironic)

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Immediate_Safety_131@reddit

We have good ones in sweden too, many were actually brought her by immigrants from balkans and turkey, one of my favorite is ':" ill fuck your sister on your fathers back"!

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Substratas@reddit (OP)

Hmmm har aldrig hört det. 🤔

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Immediate_Safety_131@reddit

Och såklart har albanska polare lärt mig klassiker (ursäkta stavning) ta qifsha nonen och typ "böthe" eller qifsha rropt

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Immediate_Safety_131@reddit

Har du inte? Kanske är en grej i skåne? Eller så är inte mina vänner normala 😹

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WeOnTheMoonAgain@reddit

Det är normalt i hela landet

” knullar din mamma på din pappas rygg ”

Vet inte hur min fellow svenne-alban inte hört detta

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Immediate_Safety_131@reddit

Jo precis tycker man hört folk säga det ofta, iallafall nere i skåne, till och med svenskarna har börjat använda det

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defnotachicken@reddit

One of the funniest is "I will put yogurt in your mothers cunt and will make an ayran with it by fucking your mother."

The best imo is "may god take my life so I can fuck your deceased*."

*=deceased is used for your passed away relatives.

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No-Specialist-1435@reddit

That's just straight nasty

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Distinct-Beach3581@reddit

I was thinking that Russians have the best swear words but you guys won :))

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Holiday_Pumpkin1279@reddit

We have something similar there in Albanian too, something like: I will fuck all your dead relatives along with their gravestones.

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celBanat@reddit

We romanians also have a fixation to the deceased/dead relatives :D

"Futu-ți morții mă-tii" - "Fuck your mother's dead relatives" "Să-ti iau morții în pulă - "I take your deceased in my dick"

One of my favs for it creativity:

"Să-ți fut morții de la maimuță până la Windows 7" - "I fuck your deceased from monkey to Windows 7"

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anastis@reddit

Love this! How do you say it in Turkish?

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defnotachicken@reddit

First one depends on the one telling it there is different variations but the one I translated is "Ananın amına yoğurt koyayım, sike sike ayran yapayım."

Second one is "Allah canımı alsa da ölmüşlerini siksem." Both are very fun to say in Turkish.

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anastis@reddit

Thanks! I meant the first one, but it never hurts expanding one’s cursing portfolio!

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Hllknk@reddit

Never ever use it outside internet though

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

“Ananın amına yoğurt koyar ayran olan kadar sikerim.”

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Substratas@reddit (OP)

One of the funniest is "I will put yogurt in your mothers cunt and will make an ayran with it by fucking your mother."

The way I howled 😂

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bro_im_done@reddit

https://youtu.be/bVBG4oldNik

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DraculaTickles@reddit

I’d shit in your mother’s cunt
is one of the harshest Romanian expression from the Oltenia region (south, close to Serbia).

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Elderberry-Mediocre@reddit

Too easy!

"I will draw my scrotum over your mother grave" is the next level!

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Peter_Pornker@reddit

That’s easy? Croatian has a swear that is a past event in the future. Try to translate that.. “jebo sam te kad te uhvatim” which is roughly “When i catch you you will have been already fucked”

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PeePeeBoy-NaughtyGR@reddit

"I'll teabag your mother's grave!" I guess it is.

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Orqee@reddit

“I’ll piss in your mothers grave flower pot”

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Dauincap@reddit

There's one if I remember correctly that goes: put your hand inside my pussy and masturbate my little baby with it.

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Ka_Trewq@reddit

I will shit in all your mother's dead relatives (mă cac în morții mă-tii) - is another one, that lets the specific orifice unsaid. It sounds so weird in English.

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Orqee@reddit

How about “may stray dog hump you dry eye socket” :)

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Tiger4ever899@reddit

fk your mother's dead relatives hits the deepest in my opinion.. but i agree.. we have very fked up swear words

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Atomik919@reddit

Fuck your mother's race is stronger imo

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oldnr1@reddit

Fuck your mother's funeral cake!

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Hopeful_Addition7834@reddit

In Hungary one of the harshest cursings is calling someone a Romanian. At least it was true some years ago.

(I don't direct it at you, just came to my mind as you mentioned Romania.)

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Rotfrajver@reddit

Sorry if it too racist for someone:

Well, by this line you confirm Romanians are of different race. I suspect the G word?

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Hopeful_Addition7834@reddit

This is Romanians, not Romani/gypsi.

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Liberosis310@reddit

I HAVENT HEARD THIS PARTICULAR ONE BEFORE 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Substantial-One1934@reddit

There was an old Serbian film I've forgotten its name, but there was a scene in an embassadors house, a boy complained to his mother that a Serbian boy was swearing at him.and the answer of his mother was ohh in our country it is like good afternoon 😊

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outofluckbruh@reddit

The Spanish speakers are imo the most creative but the Dutch.. they include a lot of diseases and will be really harsh if you’re not used to it.

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starshootersupreme@reddit

Jebem ti majku kroz cerku , i fuck your mother through your daugther

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Ok-Option-1568@reddit

This was in an internet cafe around 2004, where two groups were playing a CS 1.6 clan match, and someone said: 'may God fuck your whore mother in her belly button' which apparently left such a mark on my prepubescent brain that I still remember it 22 years later

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Kaminazuma@reddit

The best CS 1.6 swearing I heard was.

“Ta qi nanen aq shum qe nuk e dallon me ujvaren e mirushes” 😂😂😂

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ParsnipVirtual3472@reddit

Ahahhshah 😂

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guramika@reddit

Lmao i also heard an amazing insult at an internet cafe playing 1.6: 'I WALKED ON YOUR MOTHERS VAGINA WITH SPERM DRENCHED SANDALS'.

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FriendlyRiothamster@reddit

F@ck, I'm old. Isn't 22 years ago sometime in the early 90s?

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fat_strelok@reddit

22 years ago is when world of warcraft first came out brother

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FriendlyRiothamster@reddit

Logically I know it. But in my heart, time stopped about ten years ago...

gif

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AmigoDeer@reddit

I feel you so much.

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humanistazazagrliti@reddit

The best swearing I've heard was hanging out at CS matches in internet cafes.

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jug0slavija@reddit

Woah. Can you please write it in Albanian. Sounds fun lol

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BudgetFantastic1857@reddit

Ta qift zoti nonen kurv n’kthiz

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webbeecut@reddit

We got an expression which I like (Turkish) where sometimes used for the arrogant fellas to understand how naive they are. I fucked more cats than mice that you catched or I fucked more sheppperds than you sheep herd

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Lazy-Relationship-34@reddit

I long for the person I was 10 minutes ago.

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Potential-Theme-4531@reddit

I thought we have brutal swearing until I heard of Dutch swear words. They literally call people by diseases. "You are cancer. Hope you get cancer. You cancer. Same for typhoid etc." Very disturbing. One thing is to swear and fuck someone's close and extended family and the other one is wishing someone ill health (not even death).

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KaradjordjevaJeSushi@reddit

It's not about being most vile, it's about creativity fueled by hatred and rage.

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CourageMind@reddit

There are also such swear words in Greece. "Shut up cancer", "Cancer to your children.", "Cancer to everything you love." etc.

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Mminas@reddit

[So that the old may remember and the young may learn](https://youtu.be/3-K5GMKOsWU?t=55)

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CourageMind@reddit

Old time classic!

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callmeblastoid@reddit

In Montenegro it's also simple like that. "Fall apart of cancer"

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ohh_its_a_throwaway@reddit

In Romanian, we also have cancer-related ill wishes (May cancer eat you), but some communities actually use it as a term of endearment.

I would say we use the word cancer more liberally in general. For example, when it's really cold outside you can say 'It's cancer outside'. We have a cute little poem about smoking after a meal that goes 'After a copious meal, a cancerous cigarette' (După o masă copioasă, o ţigară canceroasă)

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Slifer_Ra@reddit

Sounds like a league of legends chat

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alexraduca@reddit

may you die in pain and cancer - romanian: sa mori in chin și-n cancer

may your mother die - sa moară mă-ta

last one was used as ‘no way, I don’t believe you’ back in the 80s

[-]

mamlazmamlazic@reddit

Well, when we are talking about horrible insults there is one what's hard to match

"Jebem ti mrtvu majku u grobu"

meaning

"Fuck your dead mother in grave"

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Ok-Bit-663@reddit

It doesn't matter. What matters is the frequency of swearing. You do it constantly, it becomes noise. You do it sparingly, a little 'shit' will have impact.

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Deusvalt11@reddit

We can be quite verbal, but have you ever seen a chinese person swear on the internet. Whenever I press translate on their comments when arguing they are cursing somebodies families to tantalean punishment.

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CockamouseGoesWee@reddit

Flowers on my dick and bees all around

(means I don't give a crap)

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Jovan_Konstantinovic@reddit

Serbian is "my dick hurts" literal translation which is very odd

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RandomLightbulb719@reddit

Same in Romanian. “Mă doare-n pulă”, literally “it hurts in my dick”, aka I don’t care

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CockamouseGoesWee@reddit

Idk bro if my dick is hurting I definitely care

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MikyD77@reddit

In Romanian you are supposed to like it.

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CockamouseGoesWee@reddit

Spicy!

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MikyD77@reddit

It’s rather absurd, and I know that for a Greek it sounds counterintuitive. And it’s not limited to dicks, indifference and spite can be expressed by a pain in one’s elbow or ass.Some people feel the pain in their beret. Ma doare în cot / cur / bască.

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Orqee@reddit

Boli te kua

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

“The world for his dick, the minaret for his ass” is the Turkish version of that.

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hummingbyrds@reddit

so poetic. lol

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MinimumTomfoolerus@reddit

I'm trying to understand the direct translation; on surface level, 'his dick fcks the world, the minaret is in his ass' ?

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Fiery_Flamingo@reddit

It’s difficult to translate. “It’s not on my dick” means “I don’t give a fuck”, so this means “he doesn’t care about anything, you can put a minaret up his ass, he won’t mind anything”.

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CockamouseGoesWee@reddit

Why are our languages so homoerotic lmfao

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Barbak86@reddit

M'ha kari (my dick is eating) Albanian

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Orqee@reddit

That’s “puši kua” in dalmatia

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cornflakegirl87@reddit

I feel like “fuck the pussy that ejected you” (γαμω το μουνι που σε πέταγε) is more offensive 🤣

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XenophonSoulis@reddit

More simply, there's "[I write it] to my balls". Or the gesture of showing the balls, with one or both hands.

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socna-hrenovka@reddit

Ooh, a few mild ones

"dao bog da ti se osušilo sve osim veša" - "may god make it so everything dries for you except for the laundry"

"pička ti se zgadila" - "may you be disgusted by pussy"

"jebem ti isusa raspetog na križu" - "i fuck your crucified jesus"

Speaking of jesus,

"jebo ti bog isus mater" - "may god jesus fuck your mother"

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SituationRoyal6535@reddit

Don't forget to fuck the Sacred Heart of Jesus on the cross. Very Catholic, that.

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Turpentine_Tree@reddit

“Jebem ti srce mlade rode.” - “Fuck your heart of young stork.” Ridiculous swear I heard in highschool that i have to remember it. “Serem ti se u čarapu” - “I shit in your sock” Both swears have long vowel in last word for bettet impression.

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Orqee@reddit

Jebote ko te nije a ko je opet te jebo

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peercesutboylemoskri@reddit

the word for sock in you language is really close to oyrs in turkey "çorap"

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One-Loss-6497@reddit

Dude, a dictionary containing all the turkish or persian words used in the Balkans is like 10 cm thick. We call them "turcizmi".

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Orqee@reddit

Dabogda Kũrcém žilete slagao

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LenaLena93@reddit

It doesn’t have the same ring to it in English.

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fuckitsayit@reddit

Ma engleski je kurac od jezika

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DrWwevox@reddit

Vi govorite tako narodnim, a ujedno i književnim jezikom

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Cool-Pie430@reddit

Last two are what's known as Imotski combo-wombo. Deals x2 damage.

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DoolioArt@reddit

the one that I heard that was very potent but I still can't quite get it is "I fuck your rubber child". Which I heard from a guy from Trstenik.

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Legitimate_Note3735@reddit

the ones involving J man are really painful....

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Ka_Trewq@reddit

Haha, the first one reminds me of a Romanian curse: may your God bless you with all your soul desires, and take away your appetite forever.

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FamiliarOil2762@reddit

I mean... I'm gonna put my dick in your dead relatives.. Hmmm yeah it's more sadistic than American swear words or Japanese swear words

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cripplingbrainache_@reddit

yes, in romania we have a lot of stuff about murdering your bloodline, alcohol, animals and genitals 😭

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your_therapy_friend@reddit

Sometimes i randomly start thinking of how croatian sware words came ti exist bcs how can u with a straight face tell me the origin of “may a dog fuck ur mother” (jebenti pas mater)

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hgmnynow@reddit

Hahahah, been following this sub for a while now and this is my favourite thread.

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kopanitza@reddit

I have heard-may your wife give birth to a centipede so you have to spend the rest of your life buying shoes for it.

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Ep1cOfG1lgamesh@reddit

yeah the japanese are too reserved seriously. even "kuso" their worst swear can be seen in childrens media, because they care more about how you say it. Meanwhile, we have, I'll shit in your mouth, fuck your 7 generations of ancestors.. and a funny vulgar phrase (not exactly an insult): "may my ayran not be spilled and i not be fucked in the ass"

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pinkyelloworange@reddit

We have a somewhat similar saying in Romanian. If somebody wants to have their cake and eat it too we say they want to have “your soul in heaven and a dick up your ass.” (cu pula-n cur si cu sufletul in rai.)

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Slavic_fire@reddit

There's the same saying in Bulgaria: ne mozhe khem dushata v raya khem kura v giza (you can't have your soul in heaven and a dick up your ass)

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Angel_Of_Death09@reddit

In what context do you even use that last phrase?

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Berkosay@reddit

It’s the same context as “eat your cake and have it at the same time”, wanting both scenarios that cannot happen at the same time. Funny that we have such an extreme phrase for what the English express so nicely 😁

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Ep1cOfG1lgamesh@reddit

Tbh, we also have "hem suçlu hem güçlü" meaning "both strong and powerful" for a non-vulgar version :)

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CatnipSniffa@reddit

"both guilty and mighty" would be a better literal translation with "mighty" here being used for "righteous", coming from the good old "might makes right" mindset

(Your translation means "hem güçlü hem güçlü" :p)

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Ep1cOfG1lgamesh@reddit

Ah sht you are right I fucked up the translation lol.

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KurooDM@reddit

Its similiar to “you can’t have your cake and eat it too” for example, you might say it to a student who wants a good score but does not study.

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ImprovementMinute663@reddit

Isnt it "ne moze kurac u dupe i dusa u raj"?

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emremirrath@reddit

When you want to have/achieve something but you dont want to get in any kind of trouble for it. That means you dont want your ayran spilled and also dont want your ass get fucked.

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Terrible-Coast3765@reddit

I have met some Lithuanian girls, their curse words are so childish in comparison with Serbian ones - some religious and some about going to the hill or around the hill, I forgot 😂

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AbaddonR@reddit

I'm rather foul mouthed. ( very professional at work etc, I have my limits thankfully ) I can attest that as a Greek guy, our vocabulary when it comes to swearing can be rather rich. You can freestyle and make shit up as you go too and not the usual due to the richness of how we can swear.

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Puzzleheaded-Art-248@reddit

Il mediterraneo è stato la culla di alcune importanti religioni monoteistiche. Abbiamo buoni motivi per bestemmiare

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Comfortable_Reserve9@reddit

Anything to make divine comedy happen, I guess

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Environmental-Bit383@reddit

Outside the mandatory sexual activities with someone's mother/ aunt/ hairy ass/ trachea/ liver/god/ whatever, some other examples:

"May you watch the flowers grow from the roots!"

"May you drink water through the ground"

"No matter where you turn, let there be only planks!"

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12Dimineatza@reddit

This may be helpful to understand a portion of romanian swearing.

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STOPBADRANDOMS@reddit

Heh.. I my county, greece, we say "ΓΑΜΩ ΤΗ ΜΑΝΑ ΣΟΥ".. try to translate it :)

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AogamiBunka@reddit

Why do so many Balkan swears involve mothers and females?

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43282348@reddit

It's because mothers are supposed to be the most dear to someone and "off limits", so cursing someone's mother combined with other "holy" things makes for the worst insults.

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malina_nie_pozeczka@reddit

Men not making everything about their dicks, fucking and degrading women challenge (impossible)

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CatL1f3@reddit

In Romanian, some fun ones are "I'll shit on your mother's have to give the weeds some fertiliser", and "I'd make skis out of your mother's cross and a bobsled from the coffin"

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El_Balatro@reddit

The last one made me laugh my ass off. Absolute Poetry.

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xIcarus227@reddit

=))) last one lmfao. Sa te ineci in lacrimile cailor care au incercat sa-mi scoata pula din pizda matii. Absolute fucking poetry.

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prehistoric_monster@reddit

Amin

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RandomLightbulb719@reddit

Aia ultima să mor de am auzit-o, mor aici

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zargug2@reddit

Balkans have the most creative swears

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Snappx@reddit

Hahaha are you talking about this

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Snappx@reddit

or this one

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JazzlikeAsk8039@reddit

I don't think the Japs have enough time to think of swearwords with their unhealthy working hours

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BurgurluGenc031@reddit

İts like open source project in my language,limit is literally ur creavity in emotions.

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malina_nie_pozeczka@reddit

Hot take: most of these mentioned in the comments are boring spewing the same thing about dicks, fucking and mothers. I want to see something creative

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ExpertDebate1220@reddit

Not real insults, but sayings used in everyday life: 1.It's easy to slap nettle with another man's dick. (Means it's easy to be brave when you have no skin in the game) 2. A wolf's fuck-lair (a place where wolves go to fuck- a very remote place, pejoratively) 3. To get hit in the cunt (to get beaten, or admonished) 4.A cunt's smoke - a piece of cake, very easy to do 5. A sheep's dick - worthless, unimportant

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tenebrigakdo@reddit

I think the fact that there are basically no swear words in Slovenian is the strongest indicator that we may not be Balkan. Traditionally we swear with ... bears, dog's paws and a bit with devils.

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svxae@reddit

unfortunately yes

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Responsible_Trick466@reddit

Ill fuck all on your genealogy tree on a height descending order- Albania

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Ok_Newspaper_9696@reddit

We swear in every possible way.

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adxnycha@reddit

May everything you love, die (πού να σου πεθάνει ό,τι αγαπάς) is one of my favourites in Greek

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Br00talbastard@reddit

Meanwhile dutch is just a string of diseases we wish you to have. Also where english speakers say god damn you a dutchie says god damn me. Almost the same but it's like please strike me down already cuz im over this shit

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Balkanoboy@reddit

My favorite is jebem ti since (I fucked the Sun for you)

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Vlade-B@reddit

A Slovenian once told me, that they use serbian insults in Slovenia, because we Serbs apparently have the most vulgar and foul mouthed insults they know. Can someone tell me if you all think that way or do you know other cultures who have even worse ones?

[-]

2slim_shady@reddit

gif

Jebo mu pas mater, such a culture exchange.

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No-Natural2002@reddit

I raise you romanian: "Usca-mi-as chilotii pe crucea ma-tii" - "I would dry my panties on your mother's cross"

Futu-ti coliva ma-tii - "I will fuck your mother's funeral meal"

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puzzledpanther@reddit

"I would dry my panties on your mother's cross"

Fucking lol !! I'm using that on everyone I meet

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peercesutboylemoskri@reddit

the second one makes you sit down and contemplate your whole life

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No-Natural2002@reddit

These are the tame ones

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xIcarus227@reddit

Also 'sa-mi tarai coaiele pe coliva matii' (I'll drag my balls over your mother's coliva (aforementioned funeral meal/dessert)).

We really like that meal apparently.

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AllTheTimeOTR@reddit

May they pour concrete in your mother's P and then the entire village lines up to have thwir way with her.

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Mediocre_Current_362@reddit

γαμώ το μουνι που σε πέταγε παλιό μαλακά it’s just pure poetry

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ZAWS20XX@reddit

"some of" is doing a lot of work there

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PutAlternative7140@reddit

We also say stuff like "Ur dad don't have balls that's why I fucked Ur mom" or "ima slap Ur mom's bald head with my dick then pour yogurt on her pussy and fuck her till it becomes ayran"

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r0073rr0r@reddit

Jebem ti kokošku u zamrzivač!

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Quick-Difficulty3121@reddit

The funniest thing to me is that theres a Serbian myth that some Nemanjic ruler (idk who exactly but probably Dušan) said to some Latins send by the pope “mars u tri lepe picke materine” and this is roughly translated into go into three beautiful vaginas of your mother which was brought to the pope and is somewhere in the Vatican like files,but it’s not like certain that this happened so

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Kaminazuma@reddit

Some Albanian mild insults that are used in my town :)

Ta qi nanen - I fuck your mother

Ti qi ropt/robt - I fuck your entire family

Ta qi farefisin - I fuck your entire bloodline and seed

Ti qi gjallnit e deknit - I fuck your whole alive and dead family

Ti qi edhe mijt e shpis - I fuck even the mouses in your house.

Ta qi motren - I fuck your sister

Ta deki motren - I fuck your sister until she passes out

Ti qi hallat edhe tezet - I fuck your aunts from the father and mother side.

Shkofsh n’pidh t’somes - Go to hell (Go to your mother’s pussy)

Ti qi vorrezat - I fuck your graves

Ta qi faren n’bark - I fuck your seed in the belly

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nikolajovickg@reddit

Its improvisable generally. Lots of fucking of lots of different things and persons: family, sun, patron saint, c everyone who is touching your door knob, ritual bread, etc. For more dramatic effect, you can put question particle (jebem LI ti vs jebem ti) - 'li' as a particle is reserved only for questions - so for people roughly translating it would be something like 'am I fucking your xxx' - which is incorrect.

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julyseptember811@reddit

Jeben ti vagon riže, a na svakom zrnu tri srca Isusova.

I fuck your wagon of rice of which each grain contains three hearts of Jesus.

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DDDX_cro@reddit

My grandfather's longest insult: "jebo ti tramvaj mater s prikolicom i kondukterom".

Literal word for word: "fucked you a tram mother with the trailer and the conductor".

Meaning: "may your mother get fucked by a tram, together with the trailer and the conductor",

...meaning, I guess, the entire tram, down to passengers, staff, and even the very hardware itself.

[-]

otocan@reddit

Not a a curse word but talking about someone’s bad luck: “ti bi da imaš punu vreću pički, ti bi kurac izvuko” “If you had a bag full of pussy, you’d grab a dick”

Over heard on a beach in Croatia - I died.

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UNinvitedDEATH@reddit

Oh Turkish actually has something very similar to it with the same general meaning

"Gökten am yağsa bize/sana yarrak düşer o da sekip göte girer"

Which translates roughly into

"If pussy was falling out of skies a dick would fall on us/you which would bounce into my/your ass"

(The last part is sometimes left out or not depending on how unlucky you want to show yourself or the one person you are talking about)

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Radashin_@reddit

There's also "Gde ćeš golog dupeta gde se mere kurci" "You don't go bare assed to a dick measuring competition".

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demonnet@reddit

In Greece we have insults so bad that it's even considered taboo to say them lol. Religious related, stuff like fuck your holy Mary, fuck your Jesus etc. They are blasphemous so many people take serious offense at you saying this and it's not particularly acceptable, they're only to show extreme anger or distress.

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JimbosBalls@reddit

Oh yeah, the hate is strong with us.

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celBanat@reddit

Ah my time to shine.

In Romanian, you can swear about anything as long as it belings to your mother and it is linguistically valid.

You can say: "fuck your mother's bachelor's degree/forklift/ table, etc" and it would be valid.

This realization came to me when my uncle told me when I was young "futu-ți dinamita mă-tii" - "fuck your mother's dinamite" and I was like wait? My mom does not have dynamite. The possibilities are endless.

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PurpleDrax@reddit

Let snow forever fall on your cabbage is my favorite one followed up by f*ck your tribe.

Honorable mentiones are May you become blind, may you shit blood.

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2tall4heels@reddit

My favourite, watching a soccer match and hearing a spectator yell “kur da te otepa v celo” (a penis to kill you in the forehead)

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ImmediateFee4015@reddit

Eyyy we have fuck your clan/kin in Greece too!

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voltage-cottage@reddit

f*ck your tribe

i seme i pleme 😁

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Worried-Owl-9198@reddit

Easyyy

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Vesfel@reddit

We use the word motherfker, in Australia. It's simple and short. My mum would swear in Serbian at my brother's & myself & it translated to fk your mother in c**t. It makes sense in Serbian/Croatian/Bosnian, yet translated to English it makes no sense.

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According_Bar7746@reddit

In Albania we say: "t'qift kina nonën", it basically means "may china fuk your mother" or "may all of china fuk your mother"

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MiscreatedMonster___@reddit

Swearing is a way of stress relief, so, very healthy. When stress elevates to higher degree you need to get creative with swearing as well.

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Pale-Presentation-18@reddit

Suka

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adis91@reddit

Swearing comes from a lack of self-respect and respect to others. And that hole is really, really deep in some places in the Balkans.

[-]

BoysenberryDouble781@reddit

As a Romanian, the most unique ones i know are: "I will cum on your eyes so you can see my kids grow old" "Suck my dick untill my shoes don't fit me anymore" "Lick my dick so my kids will come out with their hair already combed" "Tell your mom to brush her teeth because the cum might start fermenting"

[-]

BednoPiskaralo@reddit

https://youtu.be/-_8EkojGUJQ?si=a3bLJK0indF56oqn

All time classic, this is for non Serbs - a collection of curses

[-]

grrrfreak@reddit

May you lick your mothers unshaved vagina while she is on her period.

[-]

PaperSweet9983@reddit

It's always something to do with mothers 😅

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dimitarivanov200222@reddit

The two that have stuck with me are:

May you have a big house and a sick person in every room

May you have lots of money and spend all of them on pills

[-]

Mravac_Kid@reddit

May you marry a centipede and work your whole life for shoes

[-]

AdvancedAd3228@reddit

Jebem li ti supu od babinih kostiju

(I fuck the soup made of your grandma's bones)

[-]

walleryana@reddit

Serbs are the GOATs, and if you don't agree, you're wrong.

[-]

SlavicRobot_@reddit

"I'll fuck your bloodied bread" is a nice mild one

[-]

tranc3rooney@reddit

I’ll fuck your seed and your tribe. And that’s like super mild.

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SlavicRobot_@reddit

An absolute classic is "fuck your sun" like the actual sun 🌞

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_Nem0_@reddit

We have those too. Bloody indeed 🥀

[-]

DoolioArt@reddit

Yeah, that's the thing, it's so mild that you only hear it in tv shows:)

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Gloomy-Statement-193@reddit

and it even rhymes

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Think_Impossible@reddit

We Bulgarians, while not shy with swearing, have total respect for our western neighbors swearing capacity. Serbian swearing is an art form on its own.

[-]

tkchrist@reddit

I think in balkans the swearing is more sexually oriented

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Lowahovrr@reddit

Quote on quote from a 15 year old cussing: “I will take those smooth hands of your grandmother and f’ck you with them while im str@ngling your mother” this is turkish btw

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moscoplaysrpg@reddit

I once heard "I hope you die in your mother's arms on Christmas day" and it was brutal

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whodarezwinzz@reddit

"May I shit in your child's pencil case" is probably my favourite right now

In Croatian: poserem ti se djetetu u pernicu

And it's just perfect! 🤩

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Usual_World4332@reddit

We somehow love to swear at random objects, Turkish has one that goes like "I may shit in your fathers wine goblet". This one maybe implies something more personal like "your father is a drunkard" as wine is prohibited for muslims to drink. Cursing and swearing is prohibited as well yet they dont care that much about this part lol

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Empty-Assistance-375@reddit

During a football match in Greece, a spectator yelled at the referee: "I fuck your child's first breath" . The rest of the spectators around him, even though they were very angry at the referee told him that he went too far 🤣

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KSOYARO@reddit

DAIM

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hitmandan_3@reddit

Bulgarian. here, one of my favorites is "I will fuck your mother's grave"

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Sarpele-Fortis@reddit

The most common one here in Romania is “f$ck your mother’s dead people (relatives)”. We also have “f&ck your mother’s grave” and all other related stuff. So yeah, we have some pretty harsh ones.

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Remarkable_Cake_4735@reddit

And your mother’s Christ

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NewRomanian@reddit

Not even remotely, not in a thousand thousand years. Our swears are passable, but the sort of shit a Chinese man on the internet will artisanally craft just to insult someone for liking the wrong costume on an anime girl in a gacha game?

They will have the 9 generations of your entire family tree kneecapped and thrown into the barn to reproduce with the fattest swine, fed only on the manure gathered across all whatever Acres of China's farmlands, then make you kowtow one thousand times, turn your head 180 degrees, kiss the Earth at their feet and call them Grandfather.

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Remarkable_Cake_4735@reddit

Lol

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abki12c@reddit

"You will fart my balls" = You won't do shit

"Fuck the vet who gave birth to you"

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Fast_potato_indeed@reddit

One of the funniest and innovative ones I heard was from a famous retired referee who heard it when he showed a red card to a football player in a city famous for its swearing (Adana)

It’s translation is something like this:

“May Sultan Abdulhamit’s Saz Ensemble fuck your mother right in the middle of Bosphorus Bridge, may both Europe watch and Asia watch “

Sultan Abdulhamit’s Ensemble apparently was one of the largest orchestras in the world .

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An_Very_Tall_Midget@reddit

In Romanian one of my favorites I witnessed from my uncle in traffic is "Avea-u-ai prunci cu mă-ta" which basically means I wish you'll have kids with your mom.

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Agreeable_Buddy_6615@reddit

May the god take my life so I can f*ck your whole anchestors is a Turkish one.

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ChesterZirawin@reddit

One of my favorites from an older guy from a village "May God allow your mother to recognize you in cevapi" (Cevapi is a type of minced meat food that looks kinda like sausages with no casing). Basically saying I hope God makes it so your mother can recognize you minced up. Kinda grim now that I think about it.

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strrax-ish@reddit

Not just swear word life lessons also like:

It's easier to go into poison ivy with another man's dick

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AlternativeRate3776@reddit

"May god fuck everything red on the calendar"

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Relevant_Country_784@reddit

This is fucking metal

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model_namakemono@reddit

U picku materinu, ovo mi je novo😂😂😂

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KojaKuqit@reddit

Albanian typically have two categories; swears and curses

Curse examples:

may you get smallpox (te raft pika)

may the devil consume your soul (ta hagert dreqi shpirtin)

may you get struck by lightning (gjoft erfeja)

Swears:

I'll fuck your whole household (ti qifsha rropt e shpis)

May the dog fuck your mother (ta qift qeni nanen)

Etc etc

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BerylliumRod@reddit

Futuți morții măti is a classic

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No-Low4792@reddit

Turkish :’hah amateurs ‘

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0a_boy0@reddit

“I will shit on your father’s soul”

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ReichVictor2@reddit

idk why this one broke me

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fleuret_fighter21@reddit

"fuck your mothers god", "fuck your mothers dead relatives", "i' piss on your head"...Ah, Romanian, such poetic turn of phrase..

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Mumbi83@reddit

Don't forget the "mild" one, especially said to children, "fuck your mother's Easter" 😂

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ReichVictor2@reddit

yeah mothers always take the brunt in Romanian for some reason lol

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Prestigious_Copy154@reddit

"May god take my life so I can fuck your dead relatives."

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Able-Star2192@reddit

İn the turkish province of maraş, probably other provinces have their versions, we say

Ağzına Maraş Sıçsın. May all the people of the city shit in your mouth.

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icy_guy26@reddit

Hopefully I'm not too late for my top favorite out of 287492752952 Albanian curse words:

"I will fuck the rats of your house."

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meercm@reddit

AMINI EŞŞEK SİKSİN

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Dorel1122@reddit

Vedea-te-aș țeapăn, cu mă-ta la balamuc și cu tac-tu în pușcărie.

May I see you dead, with your mother in a madhouse and your father in jail. You gotta love romanian 😂.

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just_vaSi@reddit

As a Romanian we can swear for 20 minutes long without repeating ourselves.

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albking98@reddit

“May all China fuck your mom”

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alec1012@reddit

One that became popular some years ago was “facea-mi-aș schiuri din crucea mă-tii” which basically translates to “I’d make myself skis out of your mother’s cross”

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BaseAdministrative32@reddit

may i fuck your mothers onions

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Lowrida88@reddit

In Montenegro we swear at the father

"Jeba' te otac očinski"

Get fucked by a fatherly father

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LitigiousAutist@reddit

So what are some then?

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Bro_said@reddit

Ananın amına çam ağacı diker gölgesinde babanı sikerim

Imma plant a pine tree in your moms pussy and fuck your dad under its shade

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AccomplishedBed5084@reddit

Once in Japanese I was so mad I did literally translate a Romanian curse, I believe it was shitting on his ancestors? The apalles look on the person I was talking to...

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Academic_Yard_2659@reddit

We're very sexual beings, we oftentimes express desire to sleep with someone's mother

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SelimSC@reddit

I once heard this gem: "Your uncle fucked you in your mothers belly". Impossible to immediately respond to as you unravel the layers.

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toppajser@reddit

By far the most brutal one I heard ever, and the only one I honestly think is for long jail sentence, is the one I heard on a local village football match in 4th Serbian football league against other villaje. This... literal curse was aimed at, yeah you know it - referee. And it goes like this:

"I fucked your child that weighs 1 kilogram."

original:

"Jebem ti dete od kilo".

Man I heard a lot of shit in my life but this and the casual continuation of cursing referee's mother and "first row on funeral" is just something else. I hadan urge to slap the fuck out of the idiot that yelled it.

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Martha_Fockers@reddit

My dad - fuck yourself in the ass you pig fucking peice of shit . Totally normal no issues

Me- calls something he does stupid

My dad - did you just call me stupid you know how disrespectful that is

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BerryConsistent25@reddit

Heard a good one in Romania: I'll make skis out of your mother's cross.

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8elly8utton@reddit

Greek driver in heavy traffic, verbally wishing the Virgin Mary and Jesus get violated 13 different ways, while driving to church.

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Kardiyok@reddit

This is probably why I'm so chill. If youre not coming up with something like fuck your mother in her dying bed Im not taking you seriously.

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KataraMan@reddit

There's a Greek insult "(I fuck) your aunt's laundry basket" and that paints quite a picture!

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Bubbly-Spot-4740@reddit

Once I heard I hope some spiders gonna fack your mom and your siblings will born with furries

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meSmash101@reddit

The worst I once heard and I don’t feel ok even writing it at this moment was: “May you dead-kiss your children”. Damn this is too much. Thankfully it’s extremely rare.

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Blausome@reddit

May a dog lick your chin.

Your mother is your father and your father is your mother.

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baron_spaghetti@reddit

May your mother give birth to an elephant so that it destroys your house.

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Substratas@reddit (OP)

May your mother give birth to an elephant so that it destroys your house.

The house is not the main thing the elephant will destroy.

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baron_spaghetti@reddit

And consider this one from the same Bulgarian guy who amazed me with his sack curses: “May your mother give birth to a hedgehog that you cannot embrace.”

Yes. Mom’s coochie is in a bad way after that spat of uncomfortable animal births.

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Dependent-Scar-5914@reddit

I fuck your past and your future: Gecmisini, gelecegini si.eyim

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Silmarlion@reddit

My favorite Turkish one is “ I would plant a tree in your mother’s cunt and fuck your sister under its shade”

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JiF905JJ@reddit

Of course! We have such classics as "fuck your house", "fuck your mother", "fuck your language", "fuck everything you have" and "fuck everything you DONT have"

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dusand_@reddit

“Fuck everyone who ever grabed your front door handle” is my personal favourite, though I am yet to get so pissed of at someone to actually use it.

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Scuipici@reddit

In romanian you can make up one on the spot and make it make sense to your enemy. Balkan swearing is number 1 and i'll die on that hill. To give you an example "I fuck your mother's cross" and this is a mild one.

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dasjozef@reddit

"I'll plant a pine tree in your mother's cunt and fuck your sister under its shade."

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Active_Unit_9498@reddit

I have traveled the world and i have yet to find fouler mouths than among Serbs.

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Recent-Excitement234@reddit

...try with Italy: genital anatomy in full spectrum and no respect for mothers/sisters, saints, God, God's mother, sacraments, dead people, etc.(holy trinity included).

Foul mouths of the world, unite!

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burakozturk001@reddit

May God take my life so I could fuck your dead relatives

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TheVoidIsBees@reddit

The lack of Bulgarians in the comments shows that we pale in comparison to our neighbors

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bobbynomates@reddit

As a British man working with dueling Balkan lads I can attest ...these insults are not to be used flippantly.

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RecentCharge9625@reddit

May I copulate with whoever cooks your burek!

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imper_forated@reddit

Hey... our swearwords may be brutal but at least we didnt create a genre of porn where people copulate with octopoids!

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Sweet_Bridge_3001@reddit

May god take my life so i can fuck your ancestors.

-A Turkish swear.

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Zlotvor_Mejdana@reddit

Jebem ti dijete krvavo, i sve živo i mrtvo. (I F! your blooded child and all that's living or dead!)

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akatosh86@reddit

Here in Georgia (The Caucasus, not Deep South) one might very verbosely describe fondling your mother's clitoris and you're obliged to punch their face or you're a non-entity

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DoolioArt@reddit

No, it has to work in a shroedinger way, if it's well delivered and friendly, you're a pussy if you react like that:)

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akatosh86@reddit

Honor cultures work in mysterious ways. In some, you're a wimp if you react and in some you don't

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sekula04@reddit

Hello from Serbia with a "may your kids' knees be on backwards" and "fuck every single grain you harvest"

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alexraduca@reddit

may you reduce (with some body part or organ)my prepuce, so that you reduce my prepuce - romanian: beli-mi-ai pula să mi-o belesti

some romanian swears sound like inviting the swearee to do some sexual act on the swearer.

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Impossible_Loquat170@reddit

Yes, u qrac...

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marosszeki@reddit

I'm pretty sure nobody beats the Balkans in creative cursing. Like, this region is world champion for some reason. It'd be interesting to do worldwide research on the topic.

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DoolioArt@reddit

True, it's an art form and I always championed it as a very important folk tradition, rather than a mere swearing. It's an entirely different category of existence.

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ImRighty@reddit

I'm serbian, a good friend of mine is Jordanian, and here iw where I find out that Arabs have it a bit better over us. I love to rage bait the guy, and usually he's swearing at me I'm Arabic. At one moment I asked him to translate what he just told me, I quote: " Fuck the sister of the doctor who slapped your booty when you came into this world."

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NikolasKage3@reddit

You are the smoke that comes out of the vagina

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Aerachna_Van_Naegrel@reddit

I just love the corfiot classic of poor fate. Khmkhm Laid be the horseshoes of the donkey, who brought saint Spyridon into the town

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etanol256@reddit

We don’t swear we customize a generational curse based on how badly you fucked up.

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Legitimate_Note3735@reddit

I'm not sure from which balkan country but someone once translated "may every female in your bloodline (dead, alive and not born yet) be known by a horse on your grave"

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MinimumTomfoolerus@reddit

I'm not catching the meaning of this one xd

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kezar23@reddit

Replace known with some other verb

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DoolioArt@reddit

That's very true, both west and east would reach for smelling salts at the tamest balkan swear sequence.

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alexraduca@reddit

I’ll piss/shit in/on your mouth/face/hairdress/eyes etc…

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fj0r1@reddit

"May china fuck your sister" is one of the highest severe swearing i know. China, as in the whole Chinese population.

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FabulousEgg9091@reddit

Jebem ti mrtvu mater u hladnom grobu.

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shogunlazo@reddit

"May Allah strike me down, so that I can fuck your dead relatives" - i have heard a turk say this

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alexraduca@reddit

may he be fucked by stalin futa-l stalin

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PhastasFlames@reddit

Romania insults have actually had Americans horrified when I translated them

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RammRras@reddit

No, I used to think it too, but Italians go even further with pure blasphemy

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JhaoVIG@reddit

Sometimes they reference cultural values like local foods or drinks:

"I will pour yoğurt into your mother's cunt and pound it till it becomes ayran."

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PeroCigla@reddit

Dim te blagi jebo 🤣

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Marakajin@reddit

I'm gonna be the odd one out and say that we absolutely do not have the most brutal swears. We have elevated swearing to an art and a part of every day speech that the most vulgar the swearing gets, the more it feels like riffing. When we *really* hate each other, we don't swear, we just come to blows.

People like the Japanese, on the other hand, have the most basic swear words; then they will look you straight in the eye, tell you with a smile from ear to ear that they wish you were a rotting corpse in a dumpster and you just *know* they absolutely mean every word of it.

So, to sum up; we are the masters of swearing, but we are not brutal about it.

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Crowarior@reddit

"Jebo ti bog mrtvu mater."

TL: "May god fuck your dead mother."

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heatseaking_rock@reddit

I don't know, I've scene some really devastating Chinese action! We are just blunt, they are incisive!

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monitor_lit_coffee@reddit

I will fuck the dead relatives on your mother's side of the family

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Barbak86@reddit

May I fuck everyone of your family who pees squatting.

May I fuck even the spiders behind your boiler.

(I translated them in the future wishing form, the way we Albanians swear)

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TheShaddowKing69@reddit

A common swear word in my country is "I will put my dick in your mother's dead relatives" which is so based.

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Primary_Emphasis_215@reddit

Fuck your mother's Easter

Fuck your mother's Christ

Fuck your mother's gods

Fuck your mother's ancestors

Theyre all along these lines in Romanian

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bddgg@reddit

One of the funniest one my mind remembers from when I was playing in the school yard sounded like this: "If I pull a phlegm on you, your mother will look for you with the submarine"

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GregGregoey@reddit

I dry my underwear on your mom's cross

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Then_Flamingo2997@reddit

Spanish ones are amazing. My favorite: I shit on the Devil's Mother

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Thick_Knowledge5566@reddit

One of my favourites is: May the whole of China fuck your mother.

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Thick_Knowledge5566@reddit

Albanina version is: Ta qift Kina nonen.

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MirageOpus@reddit

Fuck your mother's dead people - Romanian

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nightmarespringgtr@reddit

Yes. Especialy we have the most brutal ones. You can insult anything That exist in the mind.

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Rupan_Sansei_06@reddit

Naaaa, the best swear words are in italian – they’re in a league of their own.

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blackfyre426@reddit

Meanwhile, Slovenians are inventing the lamest swears and curses in existence. "300 hairy bears", "go salt yourself", "letter".

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Open_ur_eyes2002@reddit

Yess, in Romania, we have such colorful ways of swearing, and there's a lot of swear words and very interesting expressions

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Danish_enthusiast@reddit

I heard one that translates to "I fu€k your dead child in the eye through a hole in the coffin"

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bontempsd@reddit

I’d plant a pine tree in your mothers pussy and then I’ll fuck your sister in its shade.

Yeah Turkish is really poetic.

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Your___mom_@reddit

"Fuck the pussy that threw you"

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noodlemoelester@reddit

We have a slightly similar one in turkey with "the one that the whore shat out" which now that i read it isnt really similar but is in the same lane ig

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Reasonable-Owl6969@reddit

It is interesting that mother insults are not very common in Czechia. They hardly existed prior to 1989, and nobody would have understood why someone would use another person's mother to insult somebody.

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noodlemoelester@reddit

A rather mild one people can say when startled in turkey is "donkey cock to your ass" there is also a weird one which is " ill fuck your troubles" which is supposed to be a bad thing but it just sounds like the guy is trying to help to me

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Odd_Kangaroo_4797@reddit

One of the more original Romanian swearing " may you stick your Dick in your mother " mostly used in traffic.

And of course the classic which every Romanian knows " fuck your mother's dead people"

We also have many others involving Christ or God

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RandomLightbulb719@reddit

Don’t forget the one about “fucking your mom’s Easter”, because that’s a thing somehow?

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analogue_archaeology@reddit

Serbians just top the Balkan chart of swear words. No one can be so creative with their swearing as the Serbs.

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Careful_Manager_4282@reddit

"Που να δεις τους γιούς σου κρύους και τις κόρες σου να γεννάνε σκατά"

"May you see your sons cold (dead) and your daughters giving birth to shit"

"Θα σου χώσω τον Ταϋγετο στο κώλο πέτρα-πέτρα"

"Ι'll shove Taigetos (a Peloponnesian mountain) in your ass stone by stone"

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YngwieMainstream@reddit

Uscami-as chilotii pe crucea ma-tii!

I will dry my boxers / briefs (whatever you prefer, lol) on your mother's cross.

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sayinmer@reddit

babanın şarap çanağına sıçayım

I’ll take a shit in your dad’s wine glass

probably one of the lighter swears in Turkish but reminds me of my childhood 🤣

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Winter_Swordfish_314@reddit

Best one I heard so far was: Get fucked by 100 boiling Jesuses

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Extra_Strategy8510@reddit

"I'll drag my balls on your mother's funeral cake"

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Admirable_Gas1653@reddit

Me cago en tus putos muertos, en tu madre y en tu abuela. Vete a tomar por culo, hijo de puta

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Agnanac@reddit

"Jebo ti juhu od isusovih kostiju" is one of the more creative ones I've heard. Literally translates to "fuck the bone broth made from Jesus's bones". Surprisingly common for being such a convoluted phrase.

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Pr43t0r92@reddit

May your dick die at the entrance. A classic.

A less classic one

I'd make skis out of your mother's cross./ I'd dry my underwear on your mother's cross.

The most creative one I heard was

May they put coins on your mom's eyes so that the gypsies may come and steal them.

[-]

Consistent_Guava8592@reddit

Γμτχσκτπς,
Fuck your Christ and your holy Mary . Swearing in Greek is obscene given that it is technically an orthodox Christian nation. As seen above we even have an acronym on order to swear faster. Rare case of Greek efficiency ….

[-]

Vukling@reddit

An endless string of inter-connecting cuss words that need not make much sense but will get progressively more disgusting? xD Hell YEAH. I've heard some very creative ones in Serbian xD aside from the usual ones.

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Content-Natural9358@reddit

Not really something to be proud off.

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Reasonable_Cap_5798@reddit

Horse will analy fuck your dead mother, you fat piece of cunt shit, go eat a dick and die.

The worst one I said.

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exodusTay@reddit

"Allahını kitabını sikmek" is "Fuck your god and it's book" so yeah, it is pretty fucking existential sometmes

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Quickliger@reddit

This is great. Only shows how multicultural and diverse Balkans are.

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jug0slavija@reddit

It's fun to twll your kids: "fuck your mom". One of the pleasures of being a parent lol

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BudgetFantastic1857@reddit

Ta qift kali smut nonen

“ may a sick horse fuck your mother”

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TrulyJhinuine@reddit

"I'll make skis out of your mother's bones"

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Dull_Cucumber_3908@reddit

have you ever watched southpark?

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Suitable-Profit-8155@reddit

I'll cum in your eyes so you can watch my kids grow up.

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General_Error@reddit

Its more about insulting not necessrily swearing, but yes

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redditnosedive@reddit

i have never heard anything as vulgar and obscene as romanian swear talk, it's really bad

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Substantial_Record_3@reddit

remindme! in 3 days

[-]

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[-]

marinxy@reddit

We are the only ones having a swearing in perfect-futur tense:"Jebo sam ti mater kad ju vidim!" (I've fucked your mother when I see her)

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Future-Dog-5871@reddit

May a horse fuck your virgin sister on your mothers grave, jebo ti konj, krvavim kurcem, nevinu sestru na majcinom grobu. My personal favorite jebem ti tri vagona zita i u svakom zrnu tri isusa - i don't know how to translate this.fuck tri wagons of grains, and in every grain three jesuses?

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Think-Horse83@reddit

We greeks have another more brutal even i had to explain to a Bulgarian once and he became pale.. i can't even write it here

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H19BAC@reddit

Jebem ti mrtvu majku krvavim kurcem na sestrinom grobu.

"I fuck your dead mother with a bloody cock on your sister's grave"

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stefthegrey@reddit

https://www.cracked.com/article_16275_the-9-most-devastating-insults-from-around-world.html

Balkans have been at the top for a while

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RoVRossi@reddit

i fuck your mother’s dead relatives

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AssassinLJ@reddit

The kindest words my best friends said to me, are the harsher words a JP could get themselves banned.

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humanistazazagrliti@reddit

May your children inherit a PlayStation factory and have no arms to assemble them.

and another one about sarma made from Quran leaves that's way to graphic.

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Entety303@reddit

I hope your kale rots.(Naj ti ohrovt segnije) (go fuck yourself) is honestly the most goated Slovenian one.

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MaxDrexler@reddit

Afgan is very brutal too.

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Exescen@reddit

"may God take my life so I can fuck your dead relatives" is my favorite Turkish swearing

[-]

MegaTyx@reddit

Fuck your carbonated blood

[-]

BeatnologicalMNE@reddit

We are simply said, crazy....

I fuck your whole family in their pussies.

Your fucked mothers cunt you fucking fat pig.

Man, all of this is so funny in English

[-]

Spiritual_Network805@reddit

i dont even know how to begin translating "sana seve seve öğretileni sike sike unuttururum". its so wild i love it

[-]

the_reeee@reddit

Yes. English curse words are spineless. I personally like to use the insult 'Yedi sülalesini siktimin oruspu çocuğu, it oğlu it.'' Which can be translated to='' Son of a bitch who's entire bloodline i've fucked. You and your father is a dog.'' This is mild in comparison i could give a few more exampels but i dont want to just swear.

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Next_League6403@reddit

The more things go wrong, the better swear words in that country.