My father’s face is looking back at me in the mirror these days and it freaks me out

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Logical-Mirror5036@reddit

I've been jokingly asking when my grandmother became a man for a year or so now.

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Adventurous_Weird_70@reddit

I'm pretty much my mom who's been gone for 46 years now. I look like her, I act like her, I really miss her 😞💔🥺

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ONROSREPUS@reddit

I would be more freaked out if it was my mothers face because I was a fella.

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ONROSREPUS@reddit

I am still and always bee a fella. but good point the OP may or may not be. Sorry for the judgement.

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hold--the--line@reddit

Ha ha... I didn't think you were being judge-y. I thought it was a funny phrase to ise.bAs Archer says, "Phrasing People!" Sorry I made you think I was chastising you. 🐝

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When I (m 56) was younger, I was told that I looked like my mom. I didn’t mind it so much, because my father was an absolute tyrant to me. Now that I am older, somehow my body and face has devolved into my father. I am trying to reckon with this change and remind myself that I have worked my whole life on being the opposite of him. I find that I have increasingly avoided mirrors over the last year or so.

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eatitwithaspoon@reddit

You are redeeming the face you share. You're the good one. 💜

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isit_Data_or_Data@reddit

Made my day. 🤩

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PussyFoot2000@reddit

OK but when I shave my beard I look so much like my mom it freaks me out. Guess I'm captain fuckin gray beard for life.

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MaximumJones@reddit

Your mom had a beard?

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PussyFoot2000@reddit

Lol. Fuckin durrrr. How does that joke work if I look like her after I've shaved my beard off?

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mp3bear@reddit

😆

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jackwagon22w@reddit

I do as well.and my wife says I look 20 years younger when I shave

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1998no3@reddit

I channel my mother now and it’s shocking

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PRC_Spy@reddit

My father is still alive, he was barely in his 20s when he had me. But he's been looking back out of the mirror at me when I go into the bathroom under dim lighting for about the last 5 or 6 years.

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According_Today5500@reddit

My brother and I were joking today and I said omg you are just like dad doing dad things! He laughed and said well it could be worse I could look like mum like you do! I’m like ok you got me a good one. We both laughed. It’s true I am her now. Well turning into her. 😂🥳😳

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Aus3-14259@reddit

That's nothing When I first selected my FB profile image, no matter what I selected FB scoured the internet. And put a picture of my Dad up.

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LAARPer@reddit

I was raised by my grandmother. She isn't looking back at me so much as her tastes are. A lot of things we watched on TV together when I was a kid in the 80s are coming back strong as nostalgic tastes for me. For example, we watched "Dallas" together and now I am really tempted to get the full Dallas DVD set and binge watch it.

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Future_Literature_70@reddit

Do! :) Sounds fun.

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Future_Literature_70@reddit

I'm starting to look more like my mum... not enjoying that, either. I think it's very common though, you'll look like one of your parents eventually. I guess we'll get used to it!

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Cvilledog@reddit

Visited my aunt and uncle a few months back and my uncle wouldn't shut up about how much I resemble my dad. It's made weirder because my dad and I haven't had much of a relationship in nearly 40 years.

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IowaAJS@reddit

My husband's aunts and uncles do that to him all the time, tell him he looks so much like his late father. He didn't have a good relationship with his father so he kind of hates it. His aunts and uncles of course have fond memories of their brother and don't get that he didn't.

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shawshank1969@reddit

Everyone in my family has learned to ***never tell me I look like my father.*** I worked really hard in therapy (and got rhinoplasty) to not see him in the mirror.

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IowaAJS@reddit

I'm not seeing it in my face yet but my siblings- it's crazy. My one sister looks so similar to dad (not in a bad way), one of my brothers looks like our oldest uncle.

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BamaZaddy@reddit

I see my older brothers looking back at me, which is a problem since I greatly dislike them both.

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sweetsourpus@reddit

Yes, absolutely. Especially hard when you’re a woman!

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phillymjs@reddit

When I was younger everyone always said that I really favored my mom and I could kinda see it in photos from back then, but these days I absolutely look like my dad.

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theyFOOLEDmeJerry@reddit

I always thought my dad looked like the crypt keeper. This hits hard.

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DrShankensteinMD@reddit

I feel this.

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RubyLemontoodleloo@reddit

57 here, yep, I see my dad's eyes, jaw, teeth and hair line. And I'm a woman! Lolol

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Square-Wave5308@reddit

Also me. 59 now, but I was early 50s the first time I saw my dad in the mirror, or maybe my uncle Larry.

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VicSara_696@reddit

Same! 57, I use to look like my Mum! But now I’m changing into my Dad!! lol

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otchris@reddit

Lucky you! I see my grandfather! I have a little more hair, but the high forehead, thinning hair on top, and puffy hair on the sides made me look a lot like his portrait from the early 50s.

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Not_a_fan_of_me@reddit

I’m a clone. Even down to certain facial features, I look identical to my dad. Philosophically, we are polar opposites, but physically, identical.

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BoneDaddy1973@reddit

I refer you to Loudon Wainwright’s song “Surviving Twin.” Happens to us all eventually, if we’re lucky. https://youtu.be/Is9ilmbczi8

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Reboot-Glitchspark@reddit

No. When I look in the mirror, I see the face of an old man, already 10 years older than my dad ever was (he died young). Now that is weird. How can I be older than my dad?! But at the same time, I see the face of a little boy who still loves sci-fi, classic rock, and video games. Just like my dad did.

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MagScaoil@reddit

Every single day I notice this, and it also freaks me out. Sometimes I’ll catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror with the corner of my eye, and it will startle me as I wonder how Dad is here if he died 19 years ago.

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togetherwegrowstuff@reddit

It is a challenge. To deal with. Seeing someone in yourself or a loved one. And that one isn't here but they are. Yup. Its strange. And beautiful. And real Wierd. Lol.

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Glittering-Return-42@reddit

I was just thinking about that the other day. My brother looks exactly like my dad and I look exactly like my mom. My dad died at 61. I am 57 and my brother is 53. Just hoping we live longer than he did. I really didn’t think we looked as old as we did but looking at old photos of them made me realize we do, which is kinda bizarre.

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No-Country6348@reddit

I was adopted so luckily I don’t have to experience this.

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Inspect1234@reddit

Lol

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AllReflection@reddit

I’m 56, my dad died in his late 30s when I was 16. It’s been weird being older than I ever knew him to be. In my dreams of him, I’m older too.

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user86753092@reddit

I saw my mom on surveillance camera, but it was me

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Texy@reddit

For me it's my grandfather and I REALLY don't like it

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Various_Ad_2762@reddit

After my mom passed a couple years ago I freaked so many people out in our neighborhood because I looked just like her. But I always have.

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Neither_Remote_4818@reddit

Are you male or female

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pintofendlesssummer@reddit

I too look like my dad but unfortunately for me I'm a woman.

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KellyCakes@reddit

Same. Thanks for the jowls, Dad.

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MichHiker@reddit

That’s hilarious because so do I!

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InadmissibleHug@reddit

I see my eldest sister, which gives me exactly zero joy coz she’s a bitch.

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Magclin@reddit

😂…sorry that shits funny

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InadmissibleHug@reddit

It is funny 😁 We both look mostly like our father. But fuck me I didn’t look so much like her until I hit my late 40s and I hate it 😂

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jaxbravesfan@reddit

I’ve always looked a lot like my dad. My beard makes it less obvious, but the last time I shaved it off, I was like, “Holy crap, my dad’s staring back at me in the mirror!”

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la_winky@reddit

All of my uncles and my dad have ended up looking like grandpa Hank as they’ve gotten older. It’s become a running joke.

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jungle4john@reddit

When I laugh now, I hear my dad's laugh come out of me. It can be jarring.

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PeterPunksNip@reddit

I'm still the spitting image of my mom as a boy. I got her and dad's great genetics too, which makes me look like 35 at 57. Both died before really looking old. Hopefully it will be my case too. I like looking like mom, because I really miss her and I am happy to see a bit of her traits in the mirror.

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RealtorRVACity@reddit

I have been lucky 58M as I was blessed with great genetics accompanied by learning from my model sisters all the tricks to slow aging. I now do a little botox and get 3 photo facials a year to keep the redness at bay and the worry wrinkles off my forehead. It is worth it if you are a public face like I am or if you just have the money and want to dial it up a notch.

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Empty_Nestor@reddit (OP)

I don’t give a shit about aging; I just don’t enjoy looking like my dad.

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dontgetmadgetdata@reddit

Embrace it. Own it.

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supershinythings@reddit

I had an irrational thought of looking up my first boyfriend from high school. It was of course an insane idea. I found a present pic of him online and he now looks EXACTLY like his vile abusive father from back in the day. There is absolutely no way I want to be anywhere near either of them now. I’m told I look like my mother now; in my youth I was compared favorably to my father. Anyway, though my mother’s face stares back at me, my mother’s nature does not. So what you’re looking at in the mirror is genetics; who you are as a person is not necessarily constrained to mere genetic endowments.

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ChavoDemierda@reddit

I absolutely love that last statement.

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ChavoDemierda@reddit

I look like my dad too. Which is awesome because I had a couple of friends back in my 20's that had a crush on my dad because he was "good looking for his age". I'll take it.

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Elegant_Source900@reddit

More and more I see myself looking like my mother.

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NoH8Kate@reddit

I’ve looked at myself lately and seen my mother. I hate it. I don’t feel anywhere near as old as I am, but also she’s a terrible person. I hate that I look so much like her these days.

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OmahaWarrior@reddit

I see myself looking more like him every day as I inch towards my 50s. The males in the family were famous for a widows peak. It appears im following that path. I joke that my widows peak is more of a divorced mountain. I miss him. Wish I could call him up for things.

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blackpony04@reddit

My dad passed away at age 60 in 1995 and I'm just a little over 4 years away from being the age he was when he died. Seeing him in the mirror more and more today is an honor, but admittedly it is very bittersweet as I know I am not too far away from being older than he ever got to be.

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Tasty_Context5263@reddit

I'm 54f and see my dad looking back at me as well. I miss him terribly, so I don't mind. It's like getting a little glimpse of him each day.

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Fudloe@reddit

Same. I ran into my sister after not having seen her in a while and she audibly gasped. Thought I was the Ol' Man for a second.

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Quirky_Commission_56@reddit

I’m only 50, but I look better than my mom did when she was my current age because I always wore sunscreen on all exposed skin every time I went outside because we lived in a city in the desert and I’m incredibly pale and incapable of tanning. I burn, then freckle. I still apply a minimum of SPF 100 every time I go outside during the day, and I’m no longer living in the desert but still apply sunscreen on every sunny day.

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2ndChanceAtLife@reddit

Whenever I’m angry and catch a glimpse of my face in the mirror, I’m like “Oh! Mom!”

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Unusual_Memory3133@reddit

I’m 61 and look like a bald version of my mom with a beard

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SmokeyFrank@reddit

I’m 60, named after my paternal grandfather (II suffix on my name). This grandfather died in 1982 at age 62, and about six weeks earlier a family friend photographed him and others. When I let my beard grow out, I’m beginning to resemble him as seen in that photograph, in more than just our common name.

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Paint-by-numberrs@reddit

I feel like I'm turning into my aunt.

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Mr_Pink_Eyez@reddit

Yeah I look in the mirror and I’m a mix of my father and his freakin mother. This is BS!!!

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Pretend-Language-67@reddit

Oh damn, this hits for me. I'm 52 and for most of my life felt I didn't look like my Dad at all. Photos of him as a young man - he had glasses and a different face, hair etc - looked nothing like me (more boyish, different hair, great skin) But now when I am tired, and look into the mirror, I see myself looking like an old man (I guess I am) much like my father looks. Luckily he's a great man and a wonderful person all around, so it's fine to look like him....just it's the old version of him I look like.. TLDR: I'm old and now I look old, like my old man....sigh..

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pocketdare@reddit

Sounds like you need an exorcist.

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Rough_Condition75@reddit

Yes and I’m female so it’s really jarring

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bulldogsm@reddit

I'm sure hes a stunning picture of human health and attractiveness and you are the spitting image so no worries. But in high school over dinner my mom asked why I never asked out a daughter of a family friend. She kept asking and asking. So I let it out, she looks just like her father. Pin drop. Confused mom face. My dad trying really hard to not laugh while his eyes gave me the bro agreement look. Yeah her mom was lovely but her dad was this short troll, he could of played Shrek.

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thetrickstergib@reddit

Same here. It happened when I got auto tinting glasses (react alight?) - and staring back at me when I look in a shop window is my dad - who used to wear them all his life. I’m tempted to revert back to glasses and sunglasses.

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Fresh-Pin5166@reddit

I (48) have the same with my mom's face (68). My teeth somehow moved in the last few years to be a lot more crowded and crooked, which I hate. But also love because now my smile is an exact copy of my mom's and how lucky am I to be able to see my mother's smile for the rest of my life.

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mostlycatsandquilts@reddit

Aww that’s really sweet :)

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Bartlaus@reddit

I actually see more resemblance to my paternal grandfather. Not a bad deal, he was a distinguished old gentleman.

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Smart_Butterfly_7845@reddit

I was somewhere around 25 years old when I shaved my head for the summer. Looked in the mirror and I saw my dad's face in mind for the first time. Can't unsee it now.

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CryptographerOk3814@reddit

Me too. And I despise my father, so it really sucks.

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Gold-Acanthisitta545@reddit

I turn into my Mother at the Doctor's office for some reason. Doubling down on policies, double checking any BS they sling my way, triple check meds are enroute, the whole 9. Ortho told me today I'm in good shape and NO WHERE NEED a hip replacement and great flexibility. Take your meds as needed and see ya later! I'm very lucky to be 51 where my biggest issue is slight A1C elevation from peri-menopause. We're talking 5.7. My annual physical is next week and the VA will most definitely try to push some sort of med or two and the answer is always, GTFO. I will cash in on that acupuncture though.

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CleMike69@reddit

Now you understand why some People opt for Botox or surgery. lol

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Substantial_Risk_955@reddit

I always looked more like my mother and my brother looked more like my dad. Now my brother still looks like a younger version of our dad and I look like my dad. It’s all in the eyes and I find it crazy.

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unclefes@reddit

When I was young, I looked like my mother: tall, fair haired, fair skinned, in a family that was otherwise short and swarthy. Now I look like my maternal grandfather, who was widely regarded as looking the most like an Uruk-Hai in our entire extended family. And I could be his doppelgänger.

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BitchyOldBroad@reddit

Oh, honey. I'm seeing my GRANDMOTHER.

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deadbeef4@reddit

Mine’s not, but if I shave my beard, I look a whole lot like my uncles on my mom’s side did!

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Empty_Nestor@reddit (OP)

I actually look much more like my cousin than I do my brother.

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Stephvick1@reddit

I can see some resemblance but not a lot except for his bald spot 🤬 but that could also be from my grandpa on my mom’s side.

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Fritzo2162@reddit

I skipped my father's face and went straight to my grandfather's face.

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Empty_Nestor@reddit (OP)

![gif](giphy|QWw4hc5gTnJhY0BUI3)

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WhisperedSoul@reddit

Same dude. Except my mother is looking back and talking back at me. I don’t like it.

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bene_gesserit_mitch@reddit

Yes. Especially when I’m tired. I’ve discovered we both have resting grumpy face.

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andymorphic@reddit

i have had the same experience.

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DireStraits16@reddit

Yep. I look in the mirror and my dad is looking right back at me. It wouldn't be so bad if I was actually a man but I'm not.

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Apart_Reindeer_528@reddit

Yes, my oldest son just told me. I looked just like my dead mother who we did not have a good relationship. She gave me up for adoption. And then came back and robbed me when I was 16. It's a long story. Okay, so no, she's the last person on f****** Earth. I wanna look like

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Difficult-Future-450@reddit

I thought I had momma drama. I hear you about not wanting to look like her. I recently decided I actually look like my grandmother, which is awesome for me because she was a wonderful soul.

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Difficult-Future-450@reddit

I found some pictures from the baby shower for my first child not too long ago. In one, it's myself, my grandmother, and my mother. It made me realize I look like my grandmother. She passed in her early 60s. I am so happy to see her when I look in the mirror.

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HumpaDaBear@reddit

I totally understand. I tried everything to not look like my mom. Then came ozempic. Not anymore!

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Araneas@reddit

I've always looked like my Dad not always a positive after he and mum divorced. Now he's passed, it's a nice reminder most days.

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BadkyDrawnBear@reddit

My brother is in his early 40s, and he could be our dads twin when he was age, I'm in my mid 50's and look like neither of our parents, but quite a lot like my maternal grandfather when he was my age, genetics is weird, hopefully looks are all we have in common, because he died at 58.

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mldyfox@reddit

My mother's face has been looking back at me in the mirror, and she's still alive! Seriously, we'd get mistaken for each other all the time even I was a teenager we look so much alike. It's like I've got none of my dad's DNA at all (except for dark brown hair and joint issues, and having started going gray in my 20s). It can definitely feel a little freaky.

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RespondOpposite@reddit

I’m definitely my mother and two maternal grandmothers, more and more every year.

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inspector_ninety_9@reddit

Equally strange... my father's voice comes out of my mouth all the time now.

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Rungi500@reddit

Same here. He's been gone four years now and it's weird.

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PermitInteresting531@reddit

Is it weird that I was doing something stupid yesterday and heard my mom say my full name in a disappointed tone

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ancientastronaut2@reddit

My skin looks like my mother's with all the moles growths and spots of every kind. I know it's genetics, but my sisters didn't get it so sometimes I think it's karma for making fun of her as a kid. 😞

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WillBrink@reddit

We are our parents children and the longer I live the more I "get" that. That includes some personality traits and behaviors I don't like, and am not proud of. Lots of work over the decades has helped a great deal to identify such things so you are not just repeating them.

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starksfergie@reddit

I know I'm turning into my Dad, which is okay, I loved my Dad :) But yeah, he passed 4 years ago and was 91. He was lovely, crotchedy, funny, playful and serious and just kind, even if I just get a little of each, I'm okay with that. Unsure if I look like him though, I'm a blend of both Dad and Mum

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eatitwithaspoon@reddit

My mom and I have never really looked alike, I strongly favoured my paternal grandmother. Now that I'm 53, I catch glimpses of my mom in the mirror. It's a trip for sure.

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mrsristretto@reddit

I look a lot more like Dad (especially if I've got a hat on) than Mom, but god damn when my laugh comes out of my mouth it's like who the fuck was that?! I also have a crazy strong resemblance to my favorite great aunt, she was fuckin cool as hell and I hope I am half as cool as she was. Sometimes I catch glimpses of grandma (Dad's Mom) but that usually if I'm dressing up. It's wild for sure, but I wouldn't be me without all these people who came before me and im grateful fir that.

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Glum-One2514@reddit

I see my grandfather in the mirror, otherwise though... Yeah.

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PermitInteresting531@reddit

My husband says that I look more and more like my mother every day. I personally don’t see (I see me dad), but my mom was beautiful til the day she passed, so I’ll take it.

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Looking-4-Something-@reddit

The DMV issued my new license with my dad's picture on it.

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Proper_Bodybuilder58@reddit

Same. I also see me/my dad on the face of my 18 month old grandson. It’s way weird!

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Uncle_Brewster@reddit

While growing up, everyone told me I looked like my mom's brother. I was a chubby kid, and adult, and my mom's family is fairly chubby. I've lost a lot of weight, starting in my late 40s. At an Xmas event this last year, for my mom's side, an aunt told me I looked so much like my father. I had never heard anyone tell me that in my life.

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Mom_who_drinks@reddit

My mom’s picture has been on my drivers license for years.

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wildwalkerish@reddit

You are not alone.

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DantesGame@reddit

For at least the past decade. Even family members that I go back home to see now and then freak out because my father's been dead for quite awhile now. His closest sister just stares at me with tears in her eyes--both of joy and sadness. I felt uncomfortable at first but understand. Genetics are a strong thing. Good thing my dad was a handsome devil. :D

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GreatOne1969@reddit

My brother looks more like our late father and I look more like our mom in the face. It’s eerily similar.

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Jebgogh@reddit

Not his face but his and my mother’s mannerisms. I keep realizing how I basically have adopted my dad’s walk and eating habits. My mum was always a cleaner and moved and I am same. Can’t leave a dish in the sink or not wipe the counters compulsively.

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CrowsSayCawCaw@reddit

I never met my paternal grandmother because she passed away before my sibs and I were born, but of course we have pictures of her. One of my siblings noticed my resemblance to her years ago when I was still in my 30s.

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pumkinut@reddit

I'll really see it with certain facial expressions. I can also hear my father sometimes when I talk.

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Dancinfool830@reddit

My dad was 49 when he died, I am 46. I don't see his face, but I do see his eyes. I miss him terribly.

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Cold-Body-2867@reddit

I see the old man sometimes, the worst is when it's your own grandfather looking back at you. 😉

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Empty_Nestor@reddit (OP)

I haven’t hit that point yet, thankfully!

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bjb8@reddit

My Dad's face is different than mine, and he also had quite different hair. But, I seem to have the same eyebrows so that aspect I can see (half of the eyebrow closer to the nose is darker/thicker than the last half). I suppose my face is more like my Mom's but I can't really see it.

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