Why are Mr Kipling French Fancies and Cherry Bakewells so damn good!?

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Foundation_Wrong@reddit

Mr Kipling makes exceedingly good cakes.

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Legitimate-Fruit-609@reddit

I miss the large iced bakewell tart they did.

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PresidentPingu1@reddit

Have you tried the strawberry and cream flavour French Fancies. Oh my goodness, I could inhale the entire box of those things

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Affectionate-Boot-12@reddit

Pure sugar goodness on top of more sugar greatness.

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One_Complex6429@reddit

Fat and sugar with flavours. 😂 A great combo

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MrRWhitworth@reddit

Because, “He makes exceedingly good cakes”

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Secure-Occasion-3599@reddit

Walked down to the shop and bought some cherry Bakewells. By the time I got home there were only 2 left. They’re my absolute favourites!

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slemsbury@reddit

Look at the ingredients and weep.

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HorrorAccomplished78@reddit

Because they are fifty percent sugar with added sugar.

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After-Ninja9100@reddit

Try a Battenburg!

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HalfAgony-HalfHope@reddit

Mini battenburg is best. The ration of marzipan to cake is lush!

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Greatgrowler@reddit

It’s not marzipan on Kiplings mini Battenberg, just a sickly sugary paste, probably flavoured with apricot, so probably Persipan. Marzipan would be made from almond. I still eat them though.

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GnaphaliumUliginosum@reddit

TBH, a plain slab of marzipan sounds more appealing than a 'mini battenburg'. You can get decent chocolate bars that are just marzipan covered in dark chocolate, a much better alternative to the cheap and sugary nonsense Mr Kipling peddles these days. For more marzipan knowledge, if you make it yourself it is actually off-white. Historic recipes included raw egg yolk so it had a cream-yellow tinge, which is why mass-produced marzipan has yellow colouring added.

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Greatgrowler@reddit

Have you ever tried Mozart-kugeln? They are German/Austrian sweets, almond, nougat and marzipan covered in chocolate. They are sometimes sold at Christmas markets over here but in Germany they are quite a big seller.

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HalfAgony-HalfHope@reddit

Wow. I consider my marzipan related knowledge updated 🤣

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RadicalDilettante@reddit

This guy marzipans

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Popular-Custard8519@reddit

Put the marzipan into a separate pile if it’s not for you, but you’re blessed with having a man that will eat that part for you 😂

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manlovergulp@reddit (OP)

Alright!

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OkTadpole2920@reddit

Peel it!

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ComfyCatLife@reddit

And then separate the quarters.

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Toc13s@reddit

They're not. Very sickly & claggy

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likeyournamebutworse@reddit

Dunno, I often find Mr Kipling's to be a bit disappointing. Their Country Slices though? I don't know how they do it, but I think I could happily eat nothing but them until I slip into a coma.

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petrastales@reddit

Vile

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AmosHiFi2902@reddit

I dunno, but Cherry Bakewells have been my AuDHD food fixation for the past eight months. My dog helps me eat them. We have two at a time, I break off all the upper crusts, and feed them to the dog as I eat my Bakewell. I have had French Fancies fixations; it's Yellow first, Pink second, Chocolate in the bin (nah, not really, but it sounded more dramatic than "my kid eats them.") Extra Kudos if you get the Yellow and Orange Easter/Halloween specials.

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OkTadpole2920@reddit

I always get the seasonal ones, if I can. Lime Jaffa Cakes were terrific.

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AmosHiFi2902@reddit

The only problem is, I don't like Chocolate. Yeah, I know, I'm a Weirdo. 😂🤣😂

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OkTadpole2920@reddit

It's ok, I won't tell anyone 😉

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fanacapoopan@reddit

Cherry Bakewells have always been my favourite.

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EUskeptik@reddit

“Exceedingly Good Cakes”. -oo-

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Welly8oo7@reddit

He also wrote some exceedingly good books 🤯

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JK_UKA@reddit

Sugar mostly

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RobertTheSpruce@reddit

Sugar is great.

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Nigelb72@reddit

Unless you have a mis-functioning pancreas, then it tries to kill you 😔

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RobertTheSpruce@reddit

But what a tasty death.

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Nigelb72@reddit

Not really cos it's not a quick death. Firstly there's all the UTI's and then kidney failure, coma and all that bollocks. It's all a ball ache tbh... Moral to the story is, if you're diabetic and want a French Fancy, have one at the weekend or when you don't have work the next day and be prepared for an emergency sleep followed by a headache from hell... 🤣

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Nigelb72@reddit

Both are amazing. We have a small cafe/tea room near us and he makes his own from scratch. Technically his are better but I prefer Mr Kiplings because they just hit right and are the perfect size to eat whole

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Kind-Tie5236@reddit

I accidentally bought low sugar Bakewells once. Do NOT make this mistake. It is sugar that makes them 'So good.'

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booyahhey@reddit

They are not. They are nasty and cheap tasting imo. I guess people who can't bake like them.

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Fancy-Professor-7113@reddit

Because they taste like being a kid feels.

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Dazzling-Ad6085@reddit

I can’t buy french fancies. I can just inhale the box then will complain for hours that I’m too fat and my teeth hurt. I tried the m and s fondant fancies. Give me Mr Kiplings any day. I will have the white ones at Christmas, the orange ones at Halloween and the originals all year round

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Tiny_Cauliflower_618@reddit

The white ones are the only ones I find a major disappointment. I need them to have a flavour! The orange ones are magnificent.

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chewmypaws@reddit

They're not.

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gholt417@reddit

I agree. My wife was so chuffed when she brought home a box of French fancies after work. She said they were her favourite and l must admit they looked good but all I could taste was a cloying sweetness. Nah that’s the only time for me.

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chewmypaws@reddit

Yup, they're pretty bland flavour wise and are just sickly sweet and dry.

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freckledcupcake@reddit

The lemon French fancies are delectable. And far too sweet. But I love them anyway.

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Impressive-Safe-7922@reddit

Love when they sell the lemon only boxes!

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ImmediateFigure9998@reddit

I wish I could’ve met Mr. Kipling to thank him for his services to baking. Uncle Ben too, for his work during the civil rice movement.

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BeanOnAJourney@reddit

Try their Viennese Whirls and then we'll talk 🤤🤤🤤🤤

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RadicalDilettante@reddit

Especially the Halloween caramel specials.

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Maleficent-Leek2943@reddit

Never been a fan of French fancies, but I love a Bakewell slice. Or those chocolate slices. Or Viennese whirls. Or those cupcakes with the really thick layer of chocolate/orange/lemon icing on top, except I think those might not be Mr. Kipling.

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ThatBandicoot4769@reddit

I don't like them personally. They're essentially like eating a block of sugar and make me feel a bit ill. I'd rather have a proper cake.

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kalendral_42@reddit

Because they are filled with an illicit drug called … SUGAR!!!! They’ve started taxing it soon they will make it illegal ‘First they came for the Coca Cola And I did not speak out Because I do not drink coke (much) Then they came for the full size chocolate bar And I did not speak out Because I do not eat chocolate (hardly at all honestly) Then they came for the French fancies And I did not speak out Because I am not French or fancy Then they came for the iced-mocha-choc-frappa-12 pump-caramel-syrup-baby-cino And I did not speak out Because those drinks are way too complicated, & frankly disgusting & deserve to be banned’

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fattfreddy1@reddit

Because they are exceedingly good cakes. Duh.

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paradoxbound@reddit

There used to be a Mr Kipling factory near where I lived. You could get jobs there pretty easily on the line. I did a summer job there to make some cash. They had a rule that you could eat anything that they made there on the job for free. First few days I stuffed my face on Cherry Bakewell tarts. After that I barely touched them. The old hands were always amused by temps like me and would bet on how long it would take us to get sick of them.

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YouZealousideal6687@reddit

First thing I buy when I get off the plane when visiting. ALL of them! Battenberg, Bakewell, French fancies and Bramley apple tarts. Not at the airport but the first supermarket I see. And I found some delicious ice cream that we don’t have in my country, at ASDA, btw

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NobleRotter@reddit

They're not. I hope this helps

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thesuperdug@reddit

I never got the french fancy hype, it's 2 bites and they melt in your mouth before you can chew them. Cherry bakewells are S-tier though

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Equivalent-Ant6024@reddit

They sell them in Australia. They are so yummy 😋

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Stuffedwithdates@reddit

Mr Kippling makes excedingly small cakes.

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loveswimmingpools@reddit

Do you care for Kipling, Ted?

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HankScorpio30@reddit

Those Trifle ones are pretty nice too

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prustage@reddit

Mr Kipling makes very good promotional reddit posts.

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Shitelark@reddit

*squint* Are they that good? Morrissons used to have very deep Bakewell tarts, like 35mm deep. But they stopped making them... boo!

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Rusty_M@reddit

Those were fantastic topped with some skooshy cream.

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Venomenon-@reddit

Gimme a box of 6 mixed fruit pies STAT

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Anonimoose15@reddit

Glad you enjoy them but to me they are just a bit meh, definitely not “exceptional” as Mr Kipling claims, and definitely over priced compared to own brand offerings which are about the same quality usually

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penguin57@reddit

I read french fancies and my teeth started hurting just remembering how sweet they are.

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BG3restart@reddit

I really can't eat them. They hurt my teeth. Too much sugar for me, I guess.

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CrowApprehensive204@reddit

I walk past the kiplings factory on my way to work, the mince pie smell starts beginning of September, smells so good. That's when you start seeing the elves going in and out of the car park

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Difficult_Bad1064@reddit

Just the right mix of fat and sugar.

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Slow-Race9106@reddit

I think they’re rough, but I’m glad you enjoy them.

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Tasty-Woodpecker3521@reddit

UPF

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