What's a unhinged thing I can put in a bauble?

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ebola1986@reddit (OP)

No but I was recently circumcised. Wasn't allowed to keep it though, otherwise that would've been perfect. Although I'd have had to fight my friend who wanted to natter it and eat it like calamari.

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blahehblah@reddit

You certainly do have some competition for the most unhinged

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sock_cooker@reddit

>Although I'd have had to fight my friend who wanted to batter it and eat it like calamari. Now that is a true friend

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if i could i'd send you the cyst i had taken out of my head when i was 22. but that's probably illegal because it's suspended in formaldehyde i think?and it's also at my dad's house 160 miles away. but hey, if you have any friends you know that have hard cysts that need to be removed....the doctor will usually put it in a jar with some preservative and give it back to you if you ask.

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Worried-Penalty8744@reddit

You could probably fashion a small strip of pork belly to suit

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Happy_Chief@reddit

The bastards didnt let me keep mine!

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No-Supermarket-8747@reddit

Mini willies

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AnZhongLong@reddit

Baked beans

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colin_staples@reddit

Raw prawns. But hide them in the bauble so they aren't visible When they pack it away after Christmas and then take it out of the box next year...

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thehatteryone@reddit

This, paired with the lamest "unhinged" thing that is the visible part - like a plastic Santa with a knife sticking out of him, but inside him is the actual payload.

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FamSands@reddit

You are evil!!!! 😈😂

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oscarx-ray@reddit

If you want to get dark, a single, dead, bloodied baby would be worse?

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tearyme@reddit

Ashes of a dead person- if you want any I have my dad grandma and grandad. My dad would find it hilarious

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ohnowhosthat@reddit

Well if I haven't just found my final resting place wishes 🏺🔮

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Kindly_Guitar_2503@reddit

Add a bit of glitter, to make it festive.

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TillExpensive7346@reddit

Dead people glitter

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Dutch_Slim@reddit

My mum was very sociable. Can she join this bauble party? Doesn’t get out much these days 🤣

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tearyme@reddit

1000000%! Have a dead person bauble tree where we just share our ashes around 🤣🤣🤣🤣

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Competitive-Fact-820@reddit

I'll donate my MIL and FIL ashes to it - no idea what else to do with them and the husband doesn't want them we just ended up with them because his brother is in South Africa and no way are we shipping them to him.

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pixiepython@reddit

Only if we then find a way to incorporate the names of everybody in the bauble into Mambo number 5

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absbabs1@reddit

Lmao giving away your dads and grandparents ashes for some random to prank people you don’t know is something else. But if op grinds up cat little it will look the same

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No_Cartoonist981@reddit

Ooh or baby teeth, macabre and wrong imaginary made up thing (Santa vs tooth fairy)

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tearyme@reddit

I also have my wisdom teeth- they’re in a necklace but could pop them out haha

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Fcxk_Lewis@reddit

And that’s enough internet for today lmao

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SectorHistorical1395@reddit

Right? Some ideas are just wild! But hey, it’s all about making memories, right…

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EntrepreneurAway419@reddit

OP this is the one, love it

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TillExpensive7346@reddit

I have a couple of dead lizard ashes if you really want to spice it up

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guannoc@reddit

Custard.

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Playful_Ad9183@reddit

Congratulations, you all went hard on the unhinged. It takes a lot for me to nope out of here but you’ve managed it.

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JaBe68@reddit

A plastic dinosaur

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JohnLennonsNotDead@reddit

The head of Pennywise

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minipainteruk@reddit

Taxidermy. Check out world around ewe. You can find some bizarre smaller stuff

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CouchKakapo@reddit

I have just wasted more time on that site than I care to admit, amused and appalled in equal measure. So yeah something from them might do the trick.

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minipainteruk@reddit

Did you look at the t shirts? Mothman with his cock out is my favourite

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CouchKakapo@reddit

I got distracted by the "sex aids" and decided to duck out before I got too lost and confused/ aroused

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williamshatnersbeast@reddit

r/brandnewsentence Did not expect to read that today

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Obvious-Water569@reddit

Your own feces.

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AdministrativeShip2@reddit

For a nicer fill, jave you tried growing big salt crystals?

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Batalfie@reddit

A working clock. Disable all other clocks in their house and set the machines to various incorrect timezones.

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TopAngle7630@reddit

A hinge from their actual door.

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RollingKatamari@reddit

Tiny plastic penises

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littlekel7@reddit

Toe nails

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Personal-Listen-4941@reddit

You can buy bags of fake teeth through Amazon.

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Competitive-Fact-820@reddit

This is what I came here to say. Recently watched Peculiarly Ashley making toothy Easter Eggs and they are living rent free in my head. Nothing like going along nicely with your day at work and then BAM toothy egg in your brain.

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januarynights@reddit

Tiny Mr Blobby

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hook-happy@reddit

This would be terrifying to me, always hated that bastard

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TonyStowaway@reddit

Ugh yes, Blobby & Teletubbies are nightmare fuel 🤣

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mrhippo85@reddit

Baked beans

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PutridForce1559@reddit

Viagra? A picture of the twins from Shining and red liquid Your PIN/password on a grain of rice. A ransom note. A mould culture

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First-Dog-9349@reddit

Used condom

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motherofpearl89@reddit

A photo of you screaming along with some liquid so it's half full. It'll look like you're stuck and slowly drowning. That, or a tampon dipped in cranberry juice

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Smeeble09@reddit

If you do the drowning thing you have to include a little sound button thing that plays the Sonic drowning panic music.

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1nkSprite@reddit

I was trying to remember how that went, so I looked it up on YouTube. I swear it was close to bringing on a panic attack.

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Smeeble09@reddit

Buh deh... Buh Deh.... buh deh.... Buh Deh.. Buh Deh.. Bu Deh. Buh. Deh Buh Deh BUH DEH BUH DEH BUHDEHBUHDEHBUHDEH BOWWWW!!! that's about the best way I can write it.

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SpongecakeAndSpoon@reddit

Never read a comment and felt white hot panic but there’s a first time for everything :) I miss classic sonic

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Big_Miss_Steak_@reddit

That was perfection.

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Smeeble09@reddit

Thanks.

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infantile-eloquence@reddit

My initial thought was used tampon, but this is less *biohazard*

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Evening-Tomatillo-47@reddit

My initial thought was poo in it, maybe that's TOO unhinged though!

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melikebiscuit@reddit

Air dry clay in poo shape, paint brown. Unhinged, but not a biohazard.

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Wild_Wolverine9526@reddit

A fake toe (I don’t know why, it’s the first thing that popped into my mind, probably because feet are gross and so are dismembered body parts…)

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Violetpie78@reddit

Fake goldfish

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BeardSam@reddit

Apple juice! It'll look much worse than it is but is still a pretty odd thing to have there

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Common-Piccolo8956@reddit

A goldfish (obviously don't do this, that would be very cruel)

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UnacceptableUse@reddit

What about an already dead fish, like a bunch of anchovies or something you can easily get at the supermarket

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Spiritual-Oven-9936@reddit

Literally saw some baubles online yesterday that had spag bol inside 🤷‍♀️

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UnacceptableUse@reddit

Spag baubol

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Alternative-Bee2962@reddit

Scrunched up toilet paper with either Nutella or melted chocolate smeared all over the loo roll and the inside of the bauble

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Bigbanghead@reddit

A bauble

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Pembers84@reddit

A hinge

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ConsciousBother4047@reddit

Make a little cracked hole in the bauble and inside put a little label saying “flesh eating spider”

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Acceptable-Net-154@reddit

Slightly murky liquid or semi transparent coating on bauble. Glowing leering eyes. How big are the baubles. See what off brand horror plushies you can find that will fit. Or use the head of a fairly trashed doll (cut off hair, doodles, one eyed).

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Laescha@reddit

Fake teeth floating in slightly cloudy liquid

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Few_Calligrapher_764@reddit

I can probably get you a real tooth if that helps…

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notmerida@reddit

that is horrific hahahaha

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Agitated_Ad_361@reddit

*an unhinged. The placenta of a baby in your family if it’s been saved… or someone’s baby teeth.

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bigtabs88@reddit

A single doll's head, floating in slightly yellow/green liquid.

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futureprick@reddit

I’ve got a taxidermy mole in one from a friend a few years ago. Still hangs on my tree each year.

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Abwettar@reddit

Pubes for sure.

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EffBee93@reddit

Water and a live gold fish

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DreamCloudz1@reddit

I hope this is a joke. That would obviously be incredibly cruel.

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EffBee93@reddit

Obviously I'm not suggesting OP do this, he asked for the most unhinged thing...

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DreamCloudz1@reddit

Good to know! ☺️ I probably spend too much time on animal cruelty sites and see far too much depravity.

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Amazing_Divide5797@reddit

A stink palm

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magicpjj@reddit

Fill it with even tinier baubles filled with tinier things

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AardvarkSilver3643@reddit

THIS!!!

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RelationKindly@reddit

glitter. Fkin glitter

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ninjanoodle899@reddit

And drill a tiny hole in the bauble so the glitter slowly empties everywhere

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GhostLeopard_666@reddit

Tiny plastic body parts. "real" hair, the same colour as your friends you could pretend to have snipped bits off while they werent looking. Temu i think sell tiny plastic people.

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ROGERS-SONGS@reddit

A single quaver. Ask me how.

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EvaM87@reddit

OK, I'll bite. How?

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ROGERS-SONGS@reddit

When my husband was a small child he put a single quaver inside a wooden Santa tree ornament of his Gran’s. We now still have this ornament and when the decorations come out, he checks inside it before hanging it on the tree every year. The quaver is still very much in tact.

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lapsedPacifist5@reddit

Goatse

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DrainpipeDreams@reddit

Condom, lube sachet, sock, pimple-palm glove.

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StaticUsernamesSuck@reddit

Nail clippings.

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Dabbles-In-Irony@reddit

Tiny framed pictures of total strangers. A few of them are X’d out with red x’s.

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tsdesigns@reddit

Glitter, and a tiny hole

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trainpk85@reddit

Toenail clippings

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notlikeontv@reddit

Crack rocks

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poopoochewer@reddit

Urine and/or feces.

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hashbrowneggyolk0520@reddit

Username checks out

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No_Art_1977@reddit

Condoms. Unused of course

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Jamericho@reddit

Lots of Red sauce. Tiny plastic babies with no heads.

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luala@reddit

Look on Etsy for witchcraft ingredients?

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StrawberryF5@reddit

A picture of Mr Blobby.

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AfterCook780@reddit

Toenails. Either leave them in strips or cut them into snow.

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_Jay-Garage-A-Roo_@reddit

A retainer

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lonkyflonky@reddit

Bugs

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jackog420@reddit

Sex toys, parts of dead animals, a load of bugs, mayonnaise, loads of little pictures of Saddam Hussein.

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galeforcerob@reddit

I'd put an egg. They can risk shaking it to see if it's hard boiled (it won't be) and then forever the decoration is ruined.

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Outraged_Chihuahua@reddit

Tiny plastic ducks. Or lots of pictures of someone you absolutely shouldn't have inside a bauble. Like Jimmy Savile or Rolf Harris.

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mhoulden@reddit

A heart with a 2024 best before date, in homage to the popular Wham song.

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EitherChannel4874@reddit

Get a toy elf and rip it's head off. Put a little ketchup in there too.

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TillExpensive7346@reddit

Broccoli with a tiny Santa hat

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ohnobobbins@reddit

Googly eyes 👀 👀 👀

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oojiflip@reddit

Taxidermied shrew

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Morganx27@reddit

Fill it with milk or cream and say "well, I passed out 5 times making it but here's your present"

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CheesecakeExpress@reddit

I’m so confused!

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Wheresmymindoffto@reddit

Go to a tackle shop and fill it with maggots. Or chopped liver.

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Zounds90@reddit

Spaghetti

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Difficult_Bad1064@reddit

Refried beans and a kernel of corn.

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WallabyBounce@reddit

Fake hairy ball sack. You can buy ones that hang off a tow hitch on a truck 😄

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Coconutpieplates@reddit

See if a hairdresser will give you some sweepings (is that legal?).

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shoob420@reddit

Spaghetti, and halfway through the festivities just start eating it https://preview.redd.it/c0c8ha8g087g1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=04dc6fdc483b8073824bb609b0fc13f2458dd166

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phflopti@reddit

Fake severed finger(s).

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arfur_narmful@reddit

A dead house spider

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CactusCastrator@reddit

A condom. Unwrap it and screw it up first though.

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togtogtog@reddit

and fill it with a teaspoonful of wallpaper paste...

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TheShakyHandsMan@reddit

I was about to suggest wallpaper paste. Bonus points if you can present it warm.

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Subsyxx@reddit

Screw what where when...

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Marvel--Jesus@reddit

You can't. Just admit that the game is over & you've all moved on.

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Smart-Grapefruit-583@reddit

Make the tiniest ant farm or worm farm. Tiny terrarium Unhinged outside ...coat baubles in a thing layer of school glue let it dry. Warm up some vaseline, draw into a wide gauge syringe. Inject under the glue "skin" to make pus filled spots. Seal with a dot of glue . Now youve got a poppable baubles!!

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Spiritual-Iron1031@reddit

Tiny plastic cocks

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Several-Ad-6652@reddit

A fart

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Public-Entrance8816@reddit

https://preview.redd.it/0gk84g7kv77g1.png?width=1080&format=png&auto=webp&s=f1956970ead509ce8421b63846d3ac52ce78611b They had these beauties in Tesco.

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NecroVelcro@reddit

Do you have time to steal several small things from their house?

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Minimum_Leopard_2698@reddit

I’m voting for this one or the hair!

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alfiehealy@reddit

A tiny framed photo of yourself but taken from a distance so it looks like you’re watching them.

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Dry_Action1734@reddit

I don’t know where, but I’m sure you can buy small animal skulls online.

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AgglutinateDeezNuts@reddit

A single pube

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lucylastic89@reddit

tuna

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lesloid@reddit

eyeballs from dolls Spiders

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Wyldstallyn80@reddit

Part of the recipe for babies.

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BarbiePeonies@reddit

Ants

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uberdog50@reddit

Like a mini ant farm! That's brilliant. One of my favorite things as a kid.

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jrbp@reddit

As much jizz as you can collect between now and delivery day

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Sea-Still5427@reddit

The reptile food section of a pet store should be a rich source of ideas. If you're creative, make a snowglobe with a small model of the recipient.

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seadoubleyou73@reddit

your hair

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ArtistEngineer@reddit

and toenails

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VRS38@reddit

Placenta?

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No-worries-2548@reddit

Tin of baked beans

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MrSchpund@reddit

Your teeth. 🦷

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RuthTheAmazon@reddit

Some places sell roasted crickets

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Morganx27@reddit

Some places sell live crickets (I'm not advocating for this... but in theory it's funny)

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Dutch_Slim@reddit

I think mealworms would be easier and have a better visual effect!

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Dramatic_Prior_9298@reddit

If you're male, measure your penis and cut a length of ribbon the same size and put it inside with a note. If you're female, same with tits?

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wretched_cretin@reddit

Chicken feet

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PerformerOk450@reddit

£5 of fun, fit perfectly in a bauble....🤷🏽 https://preview.redd.it/55pf9zxco77g1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3fbbc5c9cb0f445395df516763b4a414b8491e9a

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Wolf-Dagger@reddit

Lots of different animal eyes. Just go around prising them out of roadkill. Nick the ones from fish in the shop. Don’t take a living animals eye, they won’t appreciate it.

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melanie110@reddit

Bits of you. Skin, nails, hair, scabs, eye lashes, pubes

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Able_While_974@reddit

A gallstone or kidney stone

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Polyglot_ocelot@reddit

Surstromming? Possibly more than unhinged, but hey.........

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isajaffacakeabiscuit@reddit

A ribbon cut to some random dimension of your body. Like your forearm length or something like that

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BernardBernouli@reddit

Chicken hearts, or maggots. Might end up with a bauble full of flies.

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in-the-cloud6679@reddit

Jelly

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IntergalacticZombie@reddit

Pubes and glitter.

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nogardleirie@reddit

Garlic

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Nehq@reddit

Baby teeth

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CrinklyPacket@reddit

Fake cockroaches? Or real ones if you’re brave enough! I got plastic ones from Amazon for Halloween, they’re disgustingly realistic.

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Vuxoon@reddit

Whole fingernails.

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You_Talk_Funny@reddit

A positive COVID test.

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Spiritual-Oven-9936@reddit

The organs of your enemies..

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trouser_mouse@reddit

Some kind of dip, no need to get up if you want to dunk your crisps in something just reach for the dip bauble

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togtogtog@reddit

A brussel sprout.

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Unfair-Draft7697@reddit

Butt plug tree and cat litter snow

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