How do you feel about kids drinking?

[-]

AskUK-ModTeam@reddit

At certain times of the year, or during certain events, a large number of users may be asking similar questions. The moderators may create a megathread to consolidate frequently asked questions. Please use these submissions when they are available.

Reply

[-]

Beneficial_Judge1775@reddit

Why not let him have like shandy bass if you can get it? I had it around that age, not very alcoholic at all but a taste of adulthood!

Reply

[-]

KrungThepMahaNK@reddit

Shandy tastes like heaven when you're 11 years old

Reply

[-]

AllThatIHaveDone@reddit

I will never forget being at scout camp and one of the kids drinking a can of Bass Shandy in our tent. He was so worried about what it was going to do to him that he puked it straight up again. I can't associate the smell or taste of shandy with anything else now :(

Reply

[-]

smellyfeet25@reddit

A friend of my mums and i used to give me cherry brandy when i visited her sometimes and cigarettes . my mum was not impressed. i was 14/15 at the time. lol

Reply

[-]

Other_Exercise@reddit

I'm extremely keen to avoid forbidden fruit mentality, so with my pre-schooler I've worked to completely normalise alcohol. He gets offered a drop of beer or wine on the end of a finger. He's so used to it he usually declines it these days. This makes me happy. My family -and my sister's kids- forbid it, which leads to this sort of ludicrous levels of curiosity, them sniffing it, and asking me how it tastes, etc. I don't want that in my own family, as I'd worry they'd sneak it when I was not around.

Reply

[-]

BaBaFiCo@reddit

I used to have a sip of my mum's wine once a week when we had dinner at my Nan's house. That progressed to having a very small glass as a teenager. I think it's healthy to give kids an introduction to alcohol that appreciates it and respects it, rather than treat it as some magical and dangerous thing they can't be near until their 18th birthday.

Reply

[-]

TSC-99@reddit

I wouldn’t at 10. I’d consider a very weak shandy.

Reply

[-]

Defiant_Practice5260@reddit

I was introduced early to alcohol (special occasions only) and I quickly developed a mature attitude to it, due to good parenting, taking that attitude through into adulthood. I don't know that it would have been different if I'd have been denied it as a child, but the more you take away, the more a child wants. I can only go off personal experience and it worked for me.

Reply

[-]

filaretgpt@reddit

I wouldn’t at 10, personally. I’m pretty health-focused and do a lot of home exercise, which people can probably tell if they’ve seen my YouTube. I’m not anti-alcohol at all, but I think there’s a big difference between a sip out of curiosity and having a proper drink. For me it’s more about setting habits early, there’s plenty of time for alcohol later on…

Reply

[-]

Flapparachi@reddit

Italian father, I’m Scottish. Watered-down wine with meals at the weekend was normal for me growing up, from school age. There is absolutely no reason for a child of 10 to be drinking alcohol. Get him a 0% beer.

Reply

[-]

johnnyjonnyjonjon@reddit

You know your kid and how they might respond better than anyone else... But I've always been of the opinion that fostering a sensible and open relationship with alcohol is better than banning it outright and making it a 'forbidden' thing. I was allowed a small drink on special occasions (2 or 3 times a year) from about the age of 10. Usually a very lemonade heavy shandy or diluted wine. I'm not a raging alcoholic now... But then, everyone is different.

Reply

[-]

Practical_Net_8944@reddit (OP)

Thanks everyone some good points about maybe a bit too young young. But I do like the idea of maybe a small glass of a 0.0% beer or a beer with lemonade. It is a special occasion and only once a year. My boy is fairly sensible and together. Thanks for all the advice.

Reply

[-]

Big_Anxiety_1683@reddit

Growing up all us kids got to have a small glass of wine with Sunday lunch. Now my daughter gets a sherry glass of champagne on special occasions, and occasionally a white wine spritzer with her Sunday lunch.

Reply

[-]

Nickabumble@reddit

I’d say it’s less about their consumption and more about the behaviour they witness. If adults around them are sensible and controlled then that’s what they know. If it’s parents getting ratarsed and aggy, then they’ll have different association of booze. Although saying that, my parents barely drank and I’m a right pisshead, so… 🤷🏻‍♂️

Reply

[-]

runforseven@reddit

I used to be allowed a sip at that age, gradually working up to small glasses as a teenager on special occasions. Did me the world of good and when I was 16/17 at parties I never overdid it because it wasn’t a new exciting thing for me. As an 18-20 year old I was never into the ‘drinking party lifestyle’ and would rather stay home with a glass of wine, if anything. Will be doing the same with my children as they grow up.

Reply

[-]

JourneyThiefer@reddit

Same, although it didn’t stop me overdoing at from like 16-21 lmao

Reply

[-]

FormalAd604@reddit

As others have said, you know your kid but at 10 I I don’t see any harm in a weak shandy. If you’re having a beer do him a 25-75 mix of beer to lemonade.

Reply

[-]

Clear_Mode_4199@reddit

I was allowed a couple shandies or a small glass of wine from around 8 or 9 for special occasions.

Reply

[-]

lithaborn@reddit

My kids are adults, my son's moved away and he and his gf don't do Xmas. My youngest still lives with us and they're getting boozy gifts lol When they were little, I worked in pubs and would treat them to a sneaky half if shandy and a bag of peanuts when they came in. I take the Continental attitude. Start them young with really watered down stuff, don't ever make it taboo, nirmalise it but don't make it a feature. We've always had spirits in but we don't drink at home unless it's a big day, birthday, Xmas, new year. If we buy beer or wine in, it's zero alcohol.

Reply

[-]

SamGreenaway@reddit

My son is only 3 so it’s a bit of a way off just yet, but as he gets older and more curious, I’m going to let him try my drinks. I’m hoping by him knowing it’s not a big thing, it will stop him from being sneaky about drinking.

Reply

[-]

txakori@reddit

As long as they aren’t driving afterwards, I have no problem with it.

Reply

[-]

thewoefulchasm@reddit

I see nothing wrong with it! Having 1 beer/wine with dinner surrounded by family is pretty normal in the real world, especially at Christmas

Reply

[-]

josh50051@reddit

Personally I think that's too young, I was 12 when my dad gave me a shandy on Holiday and my mum hit the roof. What the science says - livers can't metabolis alcohol efficienctly until the age of 15. But can safely drink alcohol from the age of 7. Also a quick Google search will say your ability to metabolis alcohol drops off from the age of 40 and this is a myth. Studies do show that drinking alcohol before the age of 15 can lead to a 4 times more likely risk of dependency in adults. From my experiences: I personally think alot of factors can come into play like how the alcohol is consumed and if we're talking addiction, I was allowed to drink alcohol daily from the age of 16 every lunch and dinner time at work. I was banned from smoking but by the age of 13 my mum caved and allowed me to have a drink on special occasions and by around 15 I could have wine or beer with meals , Sunday roast sort of thing. Or beers watching the TV . 18 to 22 I was drinking getting absolutely smashed 3 nights a week and turning up to work on time. Drunk and high off my tits. Now at the age of 33 - I drink sure a pint once ever 4 months if that. Personally I just prefer soda with my food. As for my addiction to nicotine 20 years on and I'm still addicted. I believe that because it was socially acceptable to drink I don't really care or think about it. But because of the needing to hide my cigarettes etc and smoke in secrecy it allowed my addiction to build up, unchecked. I personally believe 10 is a bit too young. I think the legal drinking age of 16/18/21 is too late and 12 to 15 is about reasonable depending on maturity. That said if he's asked it means he's curious - and saying no outright may encourage him to seek out alcohol independently. If it's not at yours it will be at a friend's or at a party or on a park bench. If he's mature let him. If he's not don't this is your decision ultimately as a parent. Maybe alcohol free? Maybe set the example by everyone having alcohol free Christmas? A small half glass won't hurt him.

Reply

[-]

Cheap-Rate-8996@reddit

I used to have Snowballs on Christmas and New Years Eve' from about the age of 12 onwards, that was the only alcohol I drank during my teen years. On my 18th birthday my dad and grandad took me out to the pub, that was the first time I got properly drunk. Some people might balk at this, and it might not be the best approach for everyone but for me it worked out really well. It subconsciously created the idea alcohol was something I had to be given instead of seeking out for myself. I actually remember when I was 19 I wanted a drink, but my first thought was "But it's not Christmas or New Year's Eve, don't take the piss". I actually had to remind myself that I could just go to the shop and buy it if I wanted! Didn't stop me from embarrassing myself at a house party later on though, I have to say...

Reply

[-]

KrungThepMahaNK@reddit

I used to have 1 or 2 as a shandy when I was that age. Parents were fairly liberal. As I hit 13/14, would have a Magners cider on a Friday night, just the one bottle I was allowed. At 16, in the park drinking with friends whatever cheap alcohol we could get bought for us. Now in my 30s - I drink on weekends only and rarely overdo it. Maybe 2-3 cans of beer while watching the football in the evening. Now with alcohol free / zero % beers everywhere, I think it might be better to give him that.

Reply

[-]

jackog420@reddit

When I was a kid it was always “you can have a shandy” but for me I would have appreciated just one beer. It’s a difficult one obviously but I feel that giving your kids a controlled amount of alcohol without watering it down gives them a bit of “respect” and trust that they will respect it more.

Reply

[-]

jackog420@reddit

Also one with a meal on a special occasion is a good idea, drives in the idea that it should only be for certain occasions and not all the time

Reply

[-]

Just_Curious_76@reddit

I think the idea of encouraging the concept of alcohol, accompanied by food, definitely seems to be a healthier approach. Having lived in Spain for many years, I saw alcohol enjoyed more in this way as an accompaniment with food, especially since small tapas are generally always automatically served with drinks out there, particularly in the South of Spain. The locals always appeared to have a healthier approach to alcohol because of this, and I use to cringe when out with my fellow Brits over there, where alcohol for alcohol’s sake was more the focus.

Reply

[-]

Just_Curious_76@reddit

I guess the other, less popular side to this topic, is the fact that there is more and more emerging research clearly pointing to the toxicity of alcohol, and that it’s literally poisoning us. I have lots of AF friends from around the world who quote US figures which suggest the alcohol free lifestyle is gaining so much traction, that Guinness zero drinks are overtaking sales of regular Guinness. Food (or drink!} for thought maybe?

Reply

[-]

roloem91@reddit

People are saying that letting them drink at home at an early age will stop it being so exciting and less likely to binge drink. My parents did this, I still developed a pretty unhealthy relationship with alcohol that only at 34 have I learnt to manage better. Saying that, there’s lots of good 0% options now, I had a 0% wine when I was pregnant that was actually decent

Reply

[-]

DaveBlerk@reddit

Quite normal in France for a young 'un to have a small tot of wine. It teaches responsible drinking is the thinking.

Reply

[-]

Oofoofoof969@reddit

I don't see much of a problem with a glass (not a large one) of wine or beer with his meal as long as he has something else to drink alongside it (Pop, Milk, water etc.). It's a healthy way to introduce him to alchohol, just limit it to very special occasions and only in the home for now. I'd also recommend having a short conversation with him about why we only drink small amounts of alcohol (it can damage our organs and increase our risk of cancer if we drink too much) and that it makes adults act silly and make bad decisions sometimes because it affects our brain function.

Reply

[-]

DistributionFine2222@reddit

My dad used to give me about 100 ml of wine every Christmas since I was 8, absolutely nothing after that, the only day I consumed alcohol until becoming 18 y.o.

Reply

[-]

leyland_gaunt@reddit

10 odd a bit young I reckon. We used to give the kids appletiser in a wine glass at that age so they felt they fitted in with everyone else! By 14/15 they were having a beer/small glass of wine with dinner.

Reply

[-]

FlapsFive@reddit

Why not make him a special mocktail instead?

Reply

[-]

TheRealVinosity@reddit

Opinion as a moderately successful winemaker. I was majorly into food, at about your son's age. Someone gave me a sip of red, about the age of twelve; absolutely hated it. Tried another one again, about 19, and loved it; with a meal. The thing is, context, and support, is everything. Alcohol should not be strange to kids. You should help them to understand it. Context, also being which country you are in.

Reply

[-]

No_Examination1386@reddit

If you must.. get him a 0.0% beer and explain why he has to be a certain age to drink alcohol. It's the law.

Reply

[-]

leyland_gaunt@reddit

The legal age to give your child booze is 5 in your own home. Not sure who is making martinis for 6 year olds but it’s legal. I reckon 10 is too young as well, but maybe just stick to pop rather than 0% beer?

Reply

[-]

zigzog7@reddit

That age is 5 at home

Reply

[-]

wobby_sobby@reddit

My grandparents gave me a tiny little glass of beer or wine, like a quarter of a serving. It was a tradition and I love the memory.

Reply

[-]

Princes_Slayer@reddit

I’m late 40’s. My parents took a very European approach to booze when I was growing up, so wine (with lemonade) was available with Sunday dinner from a young age. At Christmas we would drink snowballs, wine, port with the cheese course….I appreciate its not the norm in country, but if I had kids I’d probably have done the same

Reply

[-]

Mr_Coastliner@reddit

Probably a tad too young to be honest. When I was around 13 or so my friends dad gave us a shandy each which is a lower alcohol drink. Or perhaps an alcohol free beer to take away the mystery of what it tastes like. If wine then definitely watered down. I used to think Whiskey would taste amazing due to TV shows like two businessmen in an office with an expensive bottle and after sipping saying positive things about it. The disappointment I faced after trying it for the first time.

Reply

[-]

SlightlyIncandescent@reddit

For me it depends on the maturity of the kid. I was always an old head so even from the age of around 11, having 1 beer on christmas was OK. There are other kids that you know couldn't handle it and might want to hold off a lot longer.

Reply

[-]

Lumpy_Ad104@reddit

From about 15 I’d let my kids drink a small amount of alcohol. All are now in their mid to late twenties and are fine with alcohol.

Reply

[-]

No_Candle2537@reddit

I had a very small amount at that age, but I don't know how I'd feel about letting my own kid.

Reply

[-]

Banes_Addiction@reddit

A small amount of alcohol on a special occasion is not a problem. You don't want them even tipsy adjacent, but giving a kid one bitter shandy at 2% is hardly an issue.

Reply

[-]

Truewit_@reddit

10s a bit young, maybe wait a few years

Reply

[-]

hero_Persimmon2991@reddit

wrong

Reply

[-]

AutoModerator@reddit

**Please help keep AskUK welcoming!** - When replying to submission/post please **make genuine efforts to answer the question given**. Please no jokes, judgements, etc. - **Don't be a dick** to each other. If getting heated, just block and move on. - This is a strictly **no-politics** subreddit! Please help us by reporting comments that break these rules. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/AskUK) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Reply

Reply to Post

50 Comments