New to the UK, how should I celebrate Christmas the British way?

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Monidda@reddit

Eat some pigs in blankets with your Christmas dinner.

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Should I try making it as a medium skilled cook or difficult to make ?

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AvatarIII@reddit

If you can make a sandwich you are skilled enough

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RBisoldandtired@reddit

Heck chipolatas wrapped in rashers or bacon and cooked at the same temperature as everything else for 20-25 mins (same as all the other “sides”)

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The true way to eat pigs in blankets is to cook them alongside the turkey until both are drier than sawdust, then serve them cold under watery gravy. At least, that's what my ancestors seem to have enjoyed

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MercatorLondon@reddit

pigs in blankets to be purchased pre-prepared from the supermaket

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NatureNext2236@reddit

It’s just small sausages wrapped in bacon- easy enough to make, but even easier to buy pre-done!

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CouchKakapo@reddit

It's just sausages wrapped in bacon, but you can buy them ready made easily this time of year

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Immorals1@reddit

It's not Christmas until you've spent a regrettable amount on nice cheese

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martzgregpaul@reddit

Its traditional to wear far too little clothing, drink much too much, eat things you dont like and hang out with relatives you thought were dead.

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je55akat@reddit

Christmas Day: Chocolate and Champagne for breakfast Cook Christmas dinner Go to the pub Come home and eat Christmas dinner Nap Eat Christmas dinner left overs

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Particular_Store8743@reddit

Oooo - couple of pre-emptive Rennies for me please.

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Katharinemaddison@reddit

Definitely go for a walk weather depending. There should be lots of dogs in their Christmas jumpers.

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Elegant-Fisherman-68@reddit

Ok

Get all your family into one small home. Cram as many of them in as possible. I assume this may be difficult for you, if your family are unwilling then you can borrow a neighbours. The issue is you will be part of their family crammed into their home. You will no longer be the host family and Christmas will be entirely out of your control now. You will do as your neighbours tell you to. But it can be done as an alternative.
You don't have to get shitfaced. That's fine, I don't drink either.

But someone has to get shitfaced. At least one, you can have more, you can have everyone shitfaced if you want, so long as someone does it though, youre golden.

Board games and shit TV. This is pretty essential. It's Christmas. Not much to do. You've had your Christmas walk but now it's cold and getting late. You're with family. Or you're with your neighbours family. You need something to pass the time. This part of the evening will cause arguments. Depending on your family, these will range from the usual normal bickering to full scale war. Sides will be taken, others will claim neutrality, crockery and glassware may even become collateral. Certainly, dignity shall be. Thankfully my family isn't actually like this but my family are incredibly strange and should be studied by science but that's for a different time.
Food. This is so important. You have to have food. And 90% of it has to be food you won't eat at any other time of year. Stupid food. Inexplicable food. Food from Germany. But not burgers like we eat all year round oh no. GLUHWEIN. BROCKWURST. BRATWURST. LEBKUCHEN.

Also, let's set fire to the cake when there may or may not be copious amounts of alcohol fumes in the air by now from the 75 drunken relatives breathing out alcohol vapour

Hopefully you can manage a few of those things. If not your neighbour will

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JaBe68@reddit

You should read Jilly Coopers' book How to Survive Christmas. I think you would enjoy it.

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Limp-Archer-7872@reddit

Got the lebkuchen and stollen already. Essential.

German Badger sausage, I haven't found that.

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SomeWomanFromEngland@reddit

Go to your local theatre to see the Christmas panto, whatever it is in your area.

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C2BK@reddit

Couldn't agree more. Be prepared for audience participation, which might sound daunting if you're used to sitting quietly and watching a play, but they're performances designed for kids* (apart from the double - of often single - entendres) so it won't be complicated, just follow what everyone else does.

Examples of audience participation:

"Oh no it isn't!" audience replies "Oh yes it is!"
"Where is he?" audience replies "He's behind you!"
Booing when the baddy comes on stage.

*Some pantos also do a few late night shows with an adults only version - these often have props not usually seen on stage, and cast members sometimes play naughty pranks on each other and end up going wildly off script - they can be hilarious, but they are definitely not for the easily shocked!

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Big_b_inthehat@reddit

Great suggestion

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EngelbortHumperdonk@reddit

Oh no it isn’t!

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AdaandFred@reddit

Oh yes it is!

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ealing_ceiling@reddit

He's behind you!

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pysgod-wibbly_wobbly@reddit

Eat too much food, watch the great escape, eat all the good quality streets ( leave the shit ones)

Round off the day with a big argument with loved ones

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Fickle_Hope2574@reddit

My god the amount of comments that can't read is amazing.

If you want to spend it alone watch whatever Christmas movies BBC puts on, complain about the TV license, fall asleep during the kings speech, complain about the royal family when you wake up.

If you don't want to spend it alone there'll be a church in your town that has a Christmas dinner on. It's a good chance to socialise and meet new people.

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Possibly dumb question but do you just show up at the church Christmas dinner or do you reserve beforehand ?

Back home when the church organizes such things we buy a ticket beforehand.

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DustInTheMachine@reddit

Buy beforehand usually.

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Fickle_Hope2574@reddit

My local ones you just show up but I would ask at your local one, suppose it depends on the homeless population in your town as they'll likely go.

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AdaandFred@reddit

Will you be on your own or will you be with friends/family?

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Alone most probably.

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DustInTheMachine@reddit

Depending on your area some community centres will host a Christmas dinner for those who are alone. Might be worth having a look around. You would have to book in advance.

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mhoulden@reddit

Christmas and alcohol go back at least as far as Medieval times, and pre-Christian celebrations such as Yule go back even further. Carol singing is a sanitized version of older traditions like wassailing that involve going from door to door to get food, drink or cash from neighbours. The thing about refusing to leave until you get some figgy pudding in We Wish You A Merry Christmas is part of that.

If you're on your own, I'd look for a pub or something serving Christmas dinner instead of cooking it yourself. You'll need to book. It's not just about the food, it's also being with other people. Crackers are no fun on their own. They might have a table for people on their own to share. Afterwards you can go home and crash out in front of the TV. It's traditional for the period between Boxing Day and New Year's Eve to feel like days have no meaning (unless you're working).

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Leucurus@reddit

Well it’s Father Christmas, not Santa, for a start. Hmph

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Oh cool, that's how I call it in the other languages I grew up in too, but never heard it in English.

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DustInTheMachine@reddit

Don't worry we do use Santa in the UK, it's more modern and you'll find most children use it. I'm late 40s and grew up saying Father Christmas but a lot of my peers, influenced by US media, had starred saying Santa (and my grandma was furious about it! 😂)

Id say Father Christmas and Santa are pretty interchangeable but the latter is definitely used more by younger generations.

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RBisoldandtired@reddit

Without getting shitfaced? Well that’s not the British way :p

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

it's my second month here I'm still on my way to alcoholism.

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synystagaming@reddit

We're not alcoholics. We're British. I think we might be born with alcohol in our DNA ;)

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ButDidYouCallFirst@reddit

Highly recommend searching for a church near you that is doing a Christmas carol service.

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Will do!

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venomoushorse@reddit

You should also see if there's a local pantomime show on near you - I taught some Dutch ESL teenagers about panto last week, and they were equal parts amused and mystified. Panto is very British!

I used this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NcHxczf0aA4

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Thank you! looks very amusing i should find one around me

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venomoushorse@reddit

That's great, you should definitely go at least once. A lot of the panto show is aimed at children - when I was a kid the actors would throw sweets into the audience - but there are adult jokes in there too for the parents (mostly those jokes come from the panto dame!).

By the end of the lesson I had them shouting "oh yes it is!" at me, job done.

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tlc0330@reddit

They may also do a Christmas meal on the day that you could attend. Some people there will be religious, some won’t.

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SMuRG_Teh_WuRGG@reddit

You usually have turkey, stuffing, mash (or roast potatos), pigs in a blanket (sausage wrapped in bacon), peas, gravy, sprouts, a Christmas pudding and some wine (or tea lol)/

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Material-Bee-907@reddit

Buy yourself socks and complain when you unwrap them…….traditional

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pud_time@reddit

Wake up. Open lynx Africa gift set. Eat too much food. Watch the Kings speak. Punch your cousin who you haven’t seen all year in the face. Fall asleep to Wallace and Gromit.

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Solo-me@reddit

Eat too much food could be argumentative. Most families eat a bulked up Sunday roast and a pudding. Try spending Xmas day at the table in Italy, France, Spain etc etc.... At least 5 course meal.

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Limp-Archer-7872@reddit

Where's the argument? The post argument query seething. Someone eating their Christmas dinner on a tray in 'the other room'. The cook drinking 6 beers, one bottle of wine and then hitting the sherry before the stuffing goes in the oven.

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Bantabury97@reddit

Dad..? Is that you..?

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AvatarIII@reddit

East a tub of roses, celebrations, quality street or Cadbury heroes.

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Fickle_Hope2574@reddit

Or? You lightweight.

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AvatarIII@reddit

I think more than a tub in a day is a bit much.

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Bruno241221@reddit

Have you started drinking yet?

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

I don't want immigration to know but i've only had two beers since coming here two months ago.

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Sandy_Bananas@reddit

Get drunk? A good third of the country will join you. I can’t think of a more culturally appropriate introduction.

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MiTcH_ArTs@reddit

Hit the local xmas market/fair/fete pre xmas

Aside from eating xmas meal till you explode more than the obligatory xmas cracker... binge out on pork pies, mincemeat pies, Christmas pudding (or clootie dumpling) with brandy sauce, roast some chestnuts

Watch a panto and/or the Nutcracker and some version of The Christmas Carol

Guessing watching granny get drunk and listening to her inappropriate stories isn't an option

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EffectzHD@reddit

Watch Christmas Karma at ur local cinema and order a Chinese on Christmas Eve with Singapore style noodles and chips and only those 2 items. Buy some WKD and Smirnoff Ice and one of those yellow kodak disposable cameras and take pictures of your splendid eve to look back on.

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picklespark@reddit

I want to see that, is it good? I love Gurinder Chadha and a Bollywood-infused Christmas Carol sounded fun.

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EffectzHD@reddit

I haven’t seen it.

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jaja977@reddit

Sleep with your sons wife called Stacey while your daughter secretly records you 🫡

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Limp-Archer-7872@reddit

Ah yes make sure to watch the EastEnders Christmas special.

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Low_Spread9760@reddit

"Give me some tips on how to make ... as British as possible ... without getting shitfaced."

That's an impossible task, my friend.

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Realistic-River-1941@reddit

Celebrating Christmas "the British way" and "not getting shitfaced" are mutually exclusive.

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Vertigo_uk123@reddit

Make sure to go to your local boozer and invite the fattest guy in there to break into your house.

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Super-Surround-4347@reddit

Ah shit. I got invited last year!

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Away-Shake5887@reddit

Get absolutely shitfaced making breakfast, stay in the kitchen most of the day drinking all the wine, have the annoying relatives over who make inappropriate tropes and cause a family rift yet again, pass out for a couple hours end up playing monopoly which ends in a huge argument and everyone leaves unhappy

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whatsgoingonbird@reddit

Without getting shitfaced

Get absolutely shitfaced

Nailed it

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Away-Shake5887@reddit

Exactly it’s a ridiculous question.

One might ask…what the best way to experience an Australian summer without getting warm.

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RBisoldandtired@reddit

OP did say alone. Guess they could hallucinate after a couple bottles of wine

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Monidda@reddit

Then triumphantly retort : It was the best Christmas evah 🤣🤣

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EmzyM@reddit

You must get Christmas Crackers & wear the hat!!

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MercatorLondon@reddit

watch the king's speech at 5pm

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throwawaynomade@reddit (OP)

Do I have to watch out for TV license inspector in my chimney ?

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MercatorLondon@reddit

climbing thru chimneys was reserved for a small children in Victorian time, sadly. No inspectors.

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shinyscot@reddit

3pm?

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smushs88@reddit

They’re already shitfaced.

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Monidda@reddit

🤣

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xandapanda321@reddit

Pot noodle and a wank

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grouchytortoise@reddit

Christmas crackers with your Christmas dinner and then wear the paper hat the rest of the afternoon.

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PM_ME_UR_DIVIDEND@reddit

Honestly if you’re solo go to a pub and chat to some people - there’ll be people in there from first thing and you might make some friends. Saying merry Christmas is a good conversation starter at least.

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Away-Organization630@reddit

Have bucksfizz with breakfast

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Total_Aerie_3778@reddit

Mince pies and Christmas pudding. The mince pies might be an acquired taste but I love them warm with heavy cream/ice cream or custard.

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Nice-Woodpecker-9197@reddit

Bucks fizz and chocolate selection box for breakfast

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Ashie2112@reddit

This is the way 🥂🍫

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Top-Veterinarian-565@reddit

Wake up late to someone else preparing Christmas dinner, open presents, have friends and family around, watch King's speech, constant snacking and drinking until you go for a walk and finish up in a local pub.

To be truly British, it's not what you do on Christmas Day, it's when you wake up early the next day to queue up at your local Next store for the Boxing Day sales.

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Do what you want.

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WelshCaramel@reddit

Have an argument with your family

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