WE LOVE THE SUBS!!!
Posted by mcg_090@reddit | Xennials | View on Reddit | 134 comments
When this first aired, I was in my first year of college and my friends and I laughed our asses off because it was so bizarre
instant_ramen_chef@reddit
You guys do realize that these ads were a massive failure, Right? These ads were met with such dislike that it is widely speculated that the loss of business is what led to their downfall.
Oreostrong@reddit
Ah the sub place that made every sandwich artisan start asking "would you like that toasted?"
Legal_Talk_3847@reddit
Unfortunately those Chinchillas were later seen partying with Jeffery Epstein, putting them in the same category as most other sandwich shop mascots, such as Jared Fogel, and the Jersey Mikes guy who was caught driving in a school zone with no pants on.
CeraKatherine@reddit
The one we went to had live music on Fridays. It was a little surreal hearing a saxophone in a Quiznos...
omnes1lere@reddit
I used to work at quiznos... it was ok overall, the free sandwich for lunch was excellent though
quidPROjoe21@reddit
“BEWARE OF PAPER CUTS!”
Mr_Sophistication462@reddit
Favorite part. 😆
astro_skull@reddit
That was 10 years too early. That would have gone amazingly viral.
2reeEyedG@reddit
I hated this place. I don’t even think they had mayo let alone any other good toppings
draculawater@reddit
We also love the moon, ‘cause it is close to us.
whirlingbervish@reddit
My friends still sing this when we go camping.
Carpeteria3000@reddit
But not as much as a spoon
ChonkyGloves@reddit
Or cheese.
Chai47@reddit
Yes !!!
Gotta love the Spongmonkey.
2reeEyedG@reddit
Cause they taste good to us!
junto80@reddit
“They got a pepper bar!”
Frequent_Tiger_1637@reddit
Peak early-2000s energy. That line lived rent-free in our heads for years.
ER_Support_Plant17@reddit
Still living in my head
PrincessSarahHippo@reddit
I don't think I ever ate ate Quiznos. But those feral rodent things will never leave my memory.
riding_writer@reddit
I remember eating there once and the guy behind the counter was such an ass. I didn't want my lettuce and tomato to go through the oven but he said that was the only to get it. I never ate there again and was kind of happy when they went out of business.
tookMYshovelwithme@reddit
I feel like petty vindictiveness is a xennial trait. Not on the big things, but definitely on the small things.
orielbean@reddit
My favorite one I witnessed: MVP Sports, shoe dept guy watched 2 people walk through the almost-closed store, made eye contact, and JUST before they waved him over, he does a spin move away through the back stockroom doors. And then the store closes
tookMYshovelwithme@reddit
Me.. you... the shoe department guy.. we all know those mall rats weren't going to buy shit anyway.
bacon_in_beard@reddit
those feral rodent things are the sponge monkeys!
PrincessSarahHippo@reddit
We learned about them in marketing but I clearly forgot. I remember learning about the trunk monkey, so I am not a total lost cause.
blogsymcblogsalot@reddit
What about the bathroom monkey?
pinkocatgirl@reddit
I worked at one in college, I legitimately liked the food. I had a turkey and Swiss with their chipotle mayo like every day I worked and never got tired of it.
Szeth_Vallano@reddit
Lived? I still sing this one out at random.
adamcmorrison@reddit
Man I used to just absolutely;y devour the 3 pepper sauce
Blizzardof1991@reddit
Literally first thing I said when I saw the picture
songbirdathrt4122@reddit
Obligatory 😂
UncleGarysmagic@reddit
When you have a $5 ad budget
ConditionalDisco@reddit
I never ate at Quizno's again after those commercials. I don't get using gross stuff to advertise food. They gave me the ick before that was a saying.
Siphoneder@reddit
Quiznos didn't make money from selling subs, they made money from scamming people into becoming franchisees of money losing businesses, with one killing himself. Hence why they were all over the place in the 2000s and barely any are around today.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Quiznos#Lawsuits_and_controversies
BloodyRightToe@reddit
I knew it was a scam because they put so much sauce on the sandwich we called JizzNos
tonyrocks922@reddit
It's crazy how fast they grew and then how hard they fell. Their lasting legacy is Subway toasted sandwiches. Subways never had toasters/convection ovens before 2004 when they added them in response to how popular Quiznos was getting.
dufflebag7@reddit
I heard Boston Market pulled similar shenanigans when it was expanding in the 90s.
GrinchStoleYourShit@reddit
I honestly don’t think I’ve ever met someone that’s eaten at Boston Market
trifecta000@reddit
I completely forgot about Boston Market until this very moment lol.
xzelldx@reddit
Until very recently, DFW still had a few of these. There’s one left in Plano at Legacy and 75. One day I’m going to have the last Italian sub from that place I’ll ever have.
yayoffbalance@reddit
you are the italian fan, too???!!!!!
ABeardedBeast@reddit
Bwahahaha
goofytigre@reddit
I miss Quiznos. Haven't found a toasted turkey, ranch, and swiss sandwich that comes close to their's.
blasto2236@reddit
One of the last remaining Quizno’s in the US is in my tiny ass town in Oklahoma. They’re in the lobby of a bank that has a few other shops in there.
IDK if it’s the location or what, but they’ve thrived for over 20 years.
i-steal-forks@reddit
FWIW there are about 150 locations left in the U.S. They are mighty fine sandwiches.
yayoffbalance@reddit
Cheba Hut is so great, and they have a bar, not a pepper bar, but a bar. and ours has cheap PBRs!
EmmalouEsq@reddit
Turkey ranch and swiss, no onions
I'd love just one more!
JoeGibbon@reddit
I ate at Cheba Hut all the time when I lived in Fort Collins. I miss that place, best subs ever.
goofytigre@reddit
One recently opened in my little town and we love it!
ichthyomusa@reddit
Are they gone? I currently live in Seoul and there's several Quiznos here.
But there's also Toys R Us... so maybe Korea lives in the past as well as in the future.
TBF tho, the quality and toastiness is not even remotely close to when i had Quiznos at home back in the day.
greenmky@reddit
I used to love the Turkey on Rosemary bread, it had a red pepper sauce I've never quite found a substitute for out in tht wild.
PsionicKitten@reddit
Firehouse Subs does a pretty damn similar Italian to Quiznos.
Also *theirs. Possessive pronouns don't get apostrophes.
Pocusmaskrotus@reddit
There's still one in my city. I really should get one. They were so good, I don't understand why they went under.
Superjoe42@reddit
They were really good but it sounds like they suffered from (possibly deliberately) poor management.
Glass-Marionberry321@reddit
Wasn't it private equity took over, like they just started with Jersey Mikes? They run things to the ground and make money.
BehavioralSink@reddit
I don’t ever want to look at the nutritional information, but whoever came up with the idea of a chicken Alfredo sub deserves an award.
koolaid_chemist@reddit
I just had Quiznos in the Vegas airport, weird. I hadn’t seen one in YEARS.
agnostic_familiar@reddit
The only 2 times I ate Quiznos in my life (mid-2000s) I got insanely sick. But do I still love this ad & recall a good chunk of the lyrics?
Yes ✅ and Yes ✅
elphaba00@reddit
When Quiznos closed, I had to replace them with Potbellys for a toasted sandwich fix. It’s just not the same.
Less_Tacos@reddit
Mmmm, back when Quiznos was actually good.
Patdub85@reddit
The salads were better than the subs... and I HATE salads.
Idiopathic_Sapien@reddit
This ad campaign made me never eat at Quiznos again.
RunAwayBeerTruk@reddit
I lived off this one day a week for like a year.
Theartistcu@reddit
The amount of times I bust out “they got a pepper bar” to blank looks…
knightricer210@reddit
The timing on this post is perfect. I just stopped at the only Quiznos in my city for dinner right around the time this was posted, and I hadn't been there in years...
MurrayGrande@reddit
These ads were rather good
https://i.redd.it/gl8rs8pa4p3g1.gif
Ozy_Flame@reddit
WE ARE NOT THE HUNS
Emergency-Explorer-6@reddit
This was the greatest website ever made
TheVenetianMask@reddit
Soupy George was the first truly viral internet meme.
gerardkimblefarthing@reddit
I have often needed naughty hedgehogs in my life and no one is working in that medium any longer.
MTrizzle@reddit
Mmmmmm… toasty
AngelaIsStrange@reddit
Those dead hamsters freaked me out
Just_Average2655@reddit
Any coupon works!
TheBr0fessor@reddit
I've been a vegetarian for 12 years but I would eat the everloving fuck out of a double toasted chicken carbonara
Unlikely_Syrup5087@reddit
We need to bring back unhinged commercials like this.
mcg_090@reddit (OP)
Hell yes. Agreed
Ralliman320@reddit
Eat Quiznos subs!
They are a dollar off
When you bring a coupon!
For things to eat or oil changes
For pony ride or for hair plugs
Any coupon works!
Eat Quiznos subs!
..that jingle will live in my head until I die.
ScreenTricky4257@reddit
Yeah, this is the first version I heard. And it worked; I became a Quizno's fan.
yayoffbalance@reddit
friggin loved thier food, too. the italian sub was dream.
yayoffbalance@reddit
YES! i will randomly play these and i will sing "they got a pepper baaaaarrr" to my former college roommate. we would get so stupid high, watch adult swim, and lose our shit to these commercials. i love them so much. like, you have no idea how happy they make me.
noswimming1978@reddit
I totally forgot about this ugly little fur baby. I loved quiznos.
beardedliberal@reddit
Millennials, “Gen Z humour is weird.”
Meanwhile, Millennials…
DoingTheDumbThing@reddit
I can’t even make fun of the whole 6 7 thing because I thought this was the peak of comedy
-Banana_Pancakes-@reddit
I never thought this was funny. I thought it was weird to use rodents to advertise food just like Tang using monkeys.
Moon_Noodle@reddit
As I've gotten older, I've come to realize...
Every generation has weird humor and it's great.
tinglep@reddit
They are tasty they are crunchy they are warm because they toast them!!!
NoContextCarl@reddit
I always loved it when intentionally weird or off beat shit somehow makes it to the mainstream. Imagine working at an ad agency these days and pitching this idea. 😅
I wish Quiznos lived on with this insane ads.
NthDgree@reddit
I hated those commercials lol. I had actually forgotten about them.
GTAmark@reddit
I still love those subs 🥲
I_Dont_Functionn@reddit
I miss Quiznos and their expensive subs...SO FIRE. Honestly though, speaking of fire, Firehouse subs has done an excellent job bridging that craving gap. Unfortunately now my local firehouse subs is gone.
Howard_the_Dolphin@reddit
They are crunchy, they are toasty, they are good because they toast them.
ThEy HaVe A pEpPeR bAr
bascule@reddit
Since nobody has spelled it out specifically, these were the Spongmonkeys from rathergood.com, prolific creators of early flash animations, and if you've never checked out their other work you definitely need to see the Laibach Kittens and Tales of the Blode
JoeGibbon@reddit
They also made some naughty ones. This is what I think of, whenever I see any of their other characters.
dowut_ohghey@reddit
It's Chance Wilkins
Kikyo10@reddit
I remember seeing this for the first time. I had no idea what was going on, but I loved it
lesliev2001@reddit
I could really go for a turkey bacon guac
ItsJustBrew@reddit
i wish they still did a meatball sub
eurydice88@reddit
Was this the same ad company that did the weird Del Taco ads around the same time?
RealityOk9823@reddit
Wait, what the hell? I thought Quiznos was out of business?
https://www.quiznos.com/
Complete-Dimension35@reddit
This was a great ad campaign. Caught attention. There were no Quiznos in my immediate area when it was going. We were ruled by Subway, Blimpie's, and the original string of Jersey Mike's (I'm from New Jersey). When one opened by me, I was there for opening day because of these ads.
dufflebag7@reddit
Blimpie’s! Haven’t seen one of them in years. Apparently there are still a handful left in NJ per their website.
RealityOk9823@reddit
We need Blimpie's to come back.
badllama77@reddit
Traditional with olives we miss you.
Carpeteria3000@reddit
I still love the original. Joel Veitch is a genius.
mysecretissafe@reddit
There’s one that maybe belongs in r/lostmedia now. It was his version of Sting’s latest song. It went:
I need the toilet I need to shit Going to do it on the carpet
And I can’t find it!
Electronic-Ride-564@reddit
Well, it's a one for the monkey!
...that's from the same site too, right?
CNBLBT@reddit
I still randomly sing "I bought the wrong bananas" for no good reason.
Carpeteria3000@reddit
“My baby donkeyyy”
mcfetrja@reddit
Them Naughty Hedgehogs man… whew.
PupLondon@reddit
I fucking love these ads. Theyre SO stupid ..but i will sing, out of the blue - "TRY QUIZNOS SUBS! SUBS ARE A DOLLAR OFF! WITH A COUPON! Or similar. Im probably butchering it, but they are forever in my memory
freezingprocess@reddit
I loved those commercials.
I also loved the songs from them not in the commercials.
Axe Wound is a banger!
purplecrayonadventur@reddit
We got a pepper bar!
I thought this was some fever dream...
bigredgun0114@reddit
Most people forget this started as an Internet meme. The Quiznos ad was an homage of spongemonkey's song "we like the moon"
Dr pepper did a similar thing with "chocolate rain". They got tay Monday to do "Cherry chocolate rain"
surlysquirrelly@reddit
...and someone down the hall had a 4 ft bong... the good ol' days
JustACasualFan@reddit
Those ads were the only reason I ate there. Well, the first time. Their toasted subs were actually pretty good.
Mattimvs@reddit
I miss Quiznos
fingerling-broccoli@reddit
Warm and toasty
DisastrousBeautyyy@reddit
I used to get their Chicken Carbonara subs when I was pregnant! Omg!!! Delicious!!!!!
Fools_Errand77@reddit
….we have a pepper bar!
Ohio_gal@reddit
What a fucking fever dream. 😂
JadeDragonMeli@reddit
I used to love Quiznos. I was territory manager for a company at one point and two of my locations had a Quiznos close to them in the same strip malls.
Hands down they were better then subway, blimpies, and any other sandwich shop going at the time.
Always thought it was weird that so many went out of business so quick.
SehanineMoonbow@reddit
These ads annoyed the hell out of me. I refused to eat Quiznos for over two decades because of them.
PsionicKitten@reddit
I still assert Quiznos was ahead of the time using internet memes in their advertising. People who were like "What the fuck?" just weren't primed on the internet memes like "We like tha moon!" yet.
kevlar51@reddit
Any coupon works!
Capable_Salt_SD@reddit
These things still give me nightmares, good lord
And with advertising campaigns like this, it's no wonder why Quizno's eventually went bankrupt
MolassesConstant2256@reddit
Honey Bacon Club with extra sauce
Original_Telephone_2@reddit
This was ahead of it's time
Few_Improvement_6357@reddit
There was a dirty naked man wearing a bush. He saw a man in pants and exclaimed, "You have been cursed with the legs of a goat."
The man in pants replied, "Nay, these are pants. They keep my legs warm without scratches."
Bush man grabs his bush protectively and says, "I don't like change. I will keep my bush." And runs off.
Quiznos. We're like the guy who wore pants. This lives rent free in my head.
greaterwhiterwookiee@reddit
My ex wife worked at Quiznos when this came out. We were actually helping the owner open his second store of his franchise so we spent a lot of time in there. The number of times we yelled “THEY’VE GOT A PEPPAH BAHHHR”, well, I don’t think there’s a number.
KellyAnn3106@reddit
We lived in Denver in the 80s and 90s, where Quizno's originated, and it was always our go-to for a quick meal. I miss them.
OvenFriendly1818@reddit
This is a fever dream made real and we all saw it!!
Gator_Tail@reddit
Ate at one in Nashville recently. Was not as great as I remember. But was a great sandwich. I love a toasted sub.
Reasonable-Wave8093@reddit
I ordered the 3 footer!!!
PiperPeraboo@reddit
People always get mad at me when I remind them of this