I expected it to have taste like bolognese, but I was completely wrong

My guess is because Bolognese and Bologna are both named after the same city in Italy, OP thought that mean they tasted the same, despite the fact that one is a complex dish involving a variety of herbs, spices and aromatics; and the other is blended meat.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I rarely eat bolognese. In my mind bolognese is basically just tomato and beef. And I was in hurry before work, so I just grabbed whatever was on the shelf.

[-]

ElegantCoach4066@reddit

The problem, imo, with ketchup and pasta is that ketchup is awful for anything but fries and tater tots.

[-]

thatirishdave@reddit

Ketchup is awful for everything

[-]

forfeitgame@reddit

Apparently an unpopular opinion but I agree. People can dip whatever they want in ketchup. The acidity and flavor of it means you’re just changing your food into a vessel for ketchup though.

[-]

ElegantCoach4066@reddit

I've learned that people feel very strongly about ketchup.

I'm surprised I didn't catch more flak with my comment above.

[-]

Broad-Boat9351@reddit

Hell yeah ketchup is weird and gross

[-]

elamorine@reddit

Except hotdogs! 🌭

[-]

trytrymyguy@reddit

gif

[-]

ElegantCoach4066@reddit

I said that for hotdogs and got a very spirited reaction. It wasn't taken well. I tried to temper my opinion but I agree with you.

[-]

thatirishdave@reddit

You should say it in Chicago, they'll enjoy it there.

[-]

ElegantCoach4066@reddit

I'm done with ketchup talk. People take it too seriously.

[-]

lolimaginewtf@reddit

personally I don't eat ketchup practically at all (because of high sugar content and overall not super exciting taste), BUT my guilty pleasure is spaghetti with ketchup, I love it too much

[-]

athenapollo@reddit

Hot spaghetti, cold ketchup? Both cold? What type of noodle. I'll never try this and think you belong in jail but I'm curious...

[-]

lolimaginewtf@reddit

Hot spaghetti, cold ketchup, mix it up on the plate and consume, best with something like rotisserie chicken, but it's up to you :S

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

There's no tomato paste, so I grabbed whatever was like tomato. My bad 😔

[-]

ElegantCoach4066@reddit

No apologies necessary! Do you brother.

What I do is get the cheapest cans of store brand tomato sauce, that way it has a minimal amount of any added seasoning or sugar like Prego or those others do.

Then you can add your own seasonings to the sauce, and cook some ground beef, or pork, or whatever you want to add to it.

Plus the store brand cans usually go for less than a dollar each.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

That's really helpful! I'll keep that in mind when I make it again. Thanks mate.

[-]

Oops_I_Cracked@reddit

You’re right that tomato and beef are the dominant flavors and ingredients, but ketchup is not tomato and spam is not beef.

[-]

ZachAARogers@reddit

Bolognese is often made with milk and a less emphasis on tomato’s (if at all).

[-]

PrawnsAreCuddly@reddit

Yeah tomate paste but no tomate sauce or something

[-]

Seygem@reddit

you know there are also vegetables in there right? and spices?

[-]

PapaPatchesxd@reddit

Bro that's fucking ketchup

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

https://www.reddit.com/r/shittyfoodporn/s/ei4JgeN5Kz

[-]

milochuisael@reddit

That’s ragu, simplified

[-]

ChaoticxSerenity@reddit

"And cheese is just semi-mouldy fermented milk!"

[-]

Oops_I_Cracked@reddit

Not to be this person, but bolognese has like maybe bay leaf in it for herbs and only salt and pepper for spices. It’s all about quality tomatoes and quality meat. It’s actually a relatively easy/simple dish to make and complicating it is exactly how people fuck it up.

[-]

Ini_Miney_Mimi@reddit

It's crazy to me that you're being down voted for this comment in a sub called "shitty food porn"

And I've been in this sub a while

[-]

Ras-haad@reddit

Yeah I didn’t downvote. Seems some people think this is just a karma farm though

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Idk why people got mad here even called this for karma, I didn't even waste my food 🥲

[-]

jeffiebb@reddit

Maybe he meant bologna

[-]

Jeramy_Jones@reddit

Bologna mayonnaisé

[-]

whosits_2112@reddit

Then you should just stick with microwavable food and sandwiches.

[-]

MyNameIsSkittles@reddit

So you expected a meal that you barely cooked to taste like a meal that cooks for hours

I see the problem here, its the lack of common sense

[-]

BoxofJoes@reddit

Not even hours, you can get a decent quick bolognese in like 30-40 mins, op is just profoundly lazy and really dumb thinking the corned beef + ketchup combo would taste different because it’s beef and a red condiment

[-]

4Fourside@reddit

Tbh unless you're being authentic about it, a lot of people don't cook bolognese for hours. In the uk at least, a bolognese is basically just a tomato based sauce with mince beef you have with spaghetti. Pretty different to the sauce with milk they eat over fresh egg tagliatelle in italy

[-]

Gelato_Elysium@reddit

I mean a Bolognese is a Bolognese, no matter if it's in the UK, Italy, Brazil or whatever. Tomato sauce and minced beef is just the lazy shitty way to make it, but anybody can make a sauce and simmer it for a long time, no need to be italian.

[-]

MyNameIsSkittles@reddit

I was being hyperbolic but my (joke) point still stands

[-]

Xfuck1tX@reddit

gif

[-]

GulchFiend@reddit

why are the losers on this sub downvoting you? your actions are the entire point of this subreddit.

fuck people, man

[-]

OccamPhaser@reddit

Because someone said "why did you think it would taste like that?" And they said "I'm too lazy to cook". Which is not an answer to the question that was asked.

If someone asked you what time you went to bed you wouldn't just say "because I'm sleepy".

[-]

GulchFiend@reddit

cums inside of you then leaves you with our offspring

[-]

OccamPhaser@reddit

If you hate reddit, you should consider hating yourself instead. "Fuck people" and then does the biggest loser shit imaginable when confronted with a logical thought

[-]

shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit

Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.

Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.

[-]

OccamPhaser@reddit

You got an answer to your literal question and instantly spazzed out. I know you don't have any close friends lmao

[-]

GulchFiend@reddit

confirmed internet hater using the internet right here. try getting laid or whatever the opposite of that is you effing loser lmfao

[-]

shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit

Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.

Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.

[-]

shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit

Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.

Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.

[-]

shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit

Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.

Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.

[-]

BigFlightlessBird02@reddit

Bro did you eat raw meat???

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

It's corned beef, already cooked.

[-]

DuckCleaning@reddit

I've made some decent pasta with canned corned beef before, but I fried the meat more and cooked it down in actual tomato sauce. Not great but would do it again if I dont feel like thawing meat.

[-]

delano0408@reddit

Why the fuck did you think this was a good idea? Too lazy too cook is wild, get your priorities straight.

[-]

BigFlightlessBird02@reddit

Oh ok had no idea. Still nasty af lol

[-]

Which_Honeydew_5510@reddit

Uhhh, corned beef and ketchup won’t taste like bolognese. Completely different ingredients.

[-]

lookathemfeet@reddit

My man that beef is not cooked..

[-]

JoshHuff1332@reddit

Haha, that's just how corned beef looks, it's cured. Now that being said, this dish is a travesty

[-]

lookathemfeet@reddit

My bad! Turns out I didnt know what corned beef is. Thanks!

[-]

Jeramy_Jones@reddit

Guys don’t downvote him, this is r/shittyfoodporn not r/foodporn. We support low standards here.

[-]

adric10@reddit

Low standards is fine, but trolling isn’t.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I'm not trolling

https://www.reddit.com/r/shittyfoodporn/s/z19TpuKkwG

[-]

ChaoticxSerenity@reddit

Dude, are you for real? Just get a can of pasta sauce - no cooking required.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

They only sell in a big size for 4-5 people, I only need a single portion for myself. I don't wanna buy the big one bcs I'm worried it will go waste.

[-]

GroundbreakingAd5930@reddit

You can freeze sauce by the way

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I don't have a refrigator at my home, that's why

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

You have Tupperware containers but no fridge?

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

It's a microwave container, that costs $1.20 for 25pcs

[-]

demalo@reddit

Plan your meals around it silly!

[-]

DirtyAnusSnorter@reddit

Making bolognese barely constitutes as cooking

[-]

brmarcum@reddit

You could have just opened the jar of sauce onto the noodles. It’s already cooked. You were 99% of the way there. But you certainly clutched the fail from the jaws of success, so enjoy your… dinner

[-]

MagicOrpheus310@reddit

We can clearly see that mate haha but why did you expect it to taste like Bolognese..? Haha

[-]

pileofdeadninjas@reddit

It's going to be okay

[-]

regular-wolf@reddit

If this post is any indication of OP's future, it's not going to be okay.

[-]

tanzmeister@reddit

Dude probably just summited the mt stupid of culinary knowledge

[-]

Any_Log_281@reddit

How?

[-]

Gib_entertainment@reddit

I'm sure cooking a soffritto, adding minced beef and pancetta, cooking until lightly brown, deglazing it with wine, adding a rich broth, letting it simmer for a good hour and a half, adding some oregano and basil and parmesan couldn't possibly be better than SPAM AND KETCHUP! I'm sure Italians and everyone who makes a good bolognese just loves wasting time while they could just fling some spam and ketchup together!

No I'm not Italian but I'm offended on behalf of them!
(Ok I'm not actually offended but I cannot fathom OP's thought process)

[-]

blacks252@reddit

Hes never had bologonese

[-]

DotDash13@reddit

I ~~expected~~ hoped it to have taste like bolognese

FTFT

[-]

Past-Entrance-8804@reddit

(fixed that for thee)

[-]

blocked_memory@reddit

How they expected it to is the real question.

[-]

Crow_eggs@reddit

Ambitiously

[-]

fearless_egg1050@reddit

Asking the important questions

[-]

That-Understanding45@reddit

Because bologne.

[-]

Ikamaru@reddit

Probably thought bologna puree = bolognese. It's really supposed to be made of horse to really get that bowl of neighs flavor. /s

[-]

adric10@reddit

He claims that because he wants internet points.

[-]

chucktheninja@reddit

The only proper response this

[-]

Vivid-Material-8790@reddit

crazy how we hope for flavor but keep ending up with disappointment, huh?

[-]

MoldyZebraCake666@reddit

The fuck is that

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Corned beef and tomato sauce

[-]

killergazebo@reddit

Be honest, does the tomato sauce say ketchup on the bottle?

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Yeah it's ketchup

[-]

EatUpBonehead@reddit

Be honest you just wasted this food to take a picture for karma.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Why would I do this just for karma farming? I literally ate half of it

IMG-5228.jpg

[-]

EatUpBonehead@reddit

So you scooped out the gross part and threw it in the trash? Lol.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Nope, I planned eat the rest for lunch. Why you so salty dawg

[-]

EatUpBonehead@reddit

Why you posting fake ass posts

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Wdym fake?

[-]

elocin1985@reddit

Because if you had actually eaten that, you’d think you would’ve mixed the whole thing up and eaten it like that, not just that little bit that had the corned beef and ketchup on it with all the rest of the pasta staying clean and untouched. I’m not saying you did or didn’t eat it, just that that’s why they’re saying it looks suspicious because it does look like you just scooped out the gross part and saved the untouched pasta to use for something else.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Bolognese isn't something I have every day. The only thing I remember about the taste is the really strong tomato and the beef. And about the fake post, I wouldn't waste money buying corned beef and ketchup just for karma that clearly doesn't earn me money at all.

[-]

adric10@reddit

You literally can google bolognese to see what it looks like.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I was in hurry so I took whatever looked like "bolognese ingredients" on the shelf.

[-]

Eos462@reddit

That's not how recipes/cooking work...

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Yeah I know, but did you see the context? I was in a hurry and I was hungry.

[-]

EatUpBonehead@reddit

wHaT dO yOu MeAn FaKe

[-]

Affectionate_Elk_272@reddit

why do you care so much?

get a goddamn hobby

[-]

EatUpBonehead@reddit

No u

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

But you said you don't have a fridge.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I don't need put that on a fridge until lunch time

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

If it's more than two hours til lunch, you absolutely do. Preferably in, rather than on.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Okay, thank you

[-]

kdwhirl@reddit

YOU ATE THE GROSS PART 😭😭😭

[-]

sterling_mallory@reddit

https://i.imgur.com/E5YEFg9.jpeg

[-]

killergazebo@reddit

You are a deviant.

[-]

ApolloRocketOfLove@reddit

I bet it also says Whiskahs on the "corned beef" can too.

[-]

Raisincookie1@reddit

Oh mate that's me and my cats favourite

[-]

GranddadsSkidmarks@reddit

Because eating the cat food makes you sleepy?

[-]

Furthur_slimeking@reddit

It's 8 out of ten cats favourite!

[-]

vyrus2021@reddit

It definitely has that "mechanically separated" quality to it.

[-]

MiddleAgency5134@reddit

This is diabolical

[-]

illestofthechillest@reddit

Absolutely criminal

[-]

AnybodyNo8519@reddit

You spelled idiot wrong

[-]

JesusLiesSometimes@reddit

This is my favorite interaction ive seen on reddit

[-]

Loud_Invite_5925@reddit

And does the "corned beef" say fancy feast?

[-]

TwistRevolutionary11@reddit

This is the funniest thread ive read in a long time 😂😂😂

[-]

BelleCat20@reddit

I am actually rarely disgusted by the food here. This did it for me.

[-]

Affectionate_Elk_272@reddit

do.. do you need help?

[-]

LoosePrisonPurse@reddit

gif

[-]

No-Flatworm-9993@reddit

Did it taste like cat food and ketchup?

[-]

Maz2742@reddit

My fucking sides hurt from laughing at this thread

[-]

-DrunkRat-@reddit

I had to show my Roomie why the fuck I was laughing like a manic crackhead, this thread had tears running down my face

[-]

edked@reddit

Nasty.

[-]

Xfuck1tX@reddit

gif

[-]

Dickgivins@reddit

Well you certainly picked the right sub to post this in, I’ll give you credit for being honest in that way.

[-]

Ras-haad@reddit

😂🤣😂🤣

[-]

Bright_Resist_4580@reddit

I fear your nutrient deficiency has attributed to your pre-pica phase

[-]

Prudent-Ad-5292@reddit

How dare you

[-]

Painted-BIack-Roses@reddit

Just an fyi, tomato sauce is what "ketchup" is called in a lot of places

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Kind of, tomato sauce is different from ketchup.

[-]

danabrey@reddit

Nope, in the UK we call ketchup 'tomato sauce'.

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Hm, when I lived in London everyone called it ketchup. Tomato sauce is similar, but not as sweet as North American ketchup.

[-]

doesthedog@reddit

Maybe it is a northern England thing, but they definitely often call the actual ketchup that says "ketchup" on it "tomato sauce". They also call actual tomato sauce "tomato sauce".

The person you are responding to tried to point out a language thing, not a difference between ketchup and real tomato sauce.

[-]

danabrey@reddit

There is literally no difference between those two things in the UK. Ketchup is tomato sauce.

[-]

notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Right, so... different. Which is literally what I said.

[-]

danabrey@reddit

...sure, i was told further up this thread that ketchup and tomato sauce are different things in the UK. I was just saying that they're not.

[-]

lewkir@reddit

That's what tomato sauce is?

[-]

kandirocks@reddit

in Australia we call it tomato sauce. So his answer is as pictured to me.

[-]

Diakia@reddit

Tomato sauce and Ketchup are different

[-]

killergazebo@reddit

Which one do you put in your bolognese though?

[-]

kandirocks@reddit

pasta sauce

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

I just googled it and realized that tomato paste and tomato sauce are totally different. In my country, people here call every single tomato-based product "tomato sauce" bcs most of local foods doesn't really use tomato paste and not every supermarket stocks it. Lesson learned.

[-]

Bidcar@reddit

Spain calls it hamburger sauce, I call it French fry sauce. Potato, potato

[-]

urkermannenkoor@reddit

Yes, obviously?

[-]

macearoni@reddit

This is my favorite comment

[-]

kawiz03@reddit

It probally says Catsup to make them feel fancy..

[-]

Thatt_Katt-jpg@reddit

are you sure you didnt accidentally use a tube of churu?

[-]

Past-One2948@reddit

SPAM

[-]

Most_Ride_8203@reddit

I was going to guess wet cat food and ketchup on plain noodles lol

[-]

weedbeads@reddit

Respect for the creativity at least

[-]

khamir-ubitch@reddit

My guess would have been shells, potted meat and ketchup.

[-]

inide@reddit

Thats even worse than i thought

[-]

FlowerBuffPowerPuff@reddit

It's not as bad as what I thought it was atleast.

!Tuna.!<

[-]

BrownSugarBare@reddit

Why does that corned beef look like it murdered itself

[-]

b-onerz@reddit

It looked like refried beans to me. Refried beans would probably be better than what this supposedly is.

[-]

potato_95@reddit

Scorned Beef is what it is

[-]

Sea-Hour-6063@reddit

Tbf I thought it was posh cat food pate and ketchup.

[-]

BeegBunga@reddit

that's a spoonful of corned beef and ketchup.

ketchup is NOT tomato sauce

[-]

fddfgs@reddit

ketchup is NOT tomato sauce

In most countries ketchup and tomato sauce are interchangeable. America is the odd one out for calling passata tomato sauce.

[-]

LornaHex@reddit (OP)

https://www.reddit.com/r/shittyfoodporn/s/6l2ZcIzVUv

[-]

vyrus2021@reddit

Is it corned beef that you gnawed off of a larger piece?

[-]

This_Novel247@reddit

Did you forget to cook it?

[-]

Unhappy_Energy_741@reddit

Is that corned beef from a tube?

[-]

last-of-the-mohicans@reddit

😂. Was just thinking same. There is something seriously wrong with that corned beef.

[-]

moist_shroom6@reddit

OP found it in the pet food isle.

[-]

ObscureReferenceFace@reddit

You are way better off getting a boxed Mac and cheese and mixing in a can of tuna. Unless you are a masochist.

[-]

SirStocksAlott@reddit

It looks like a messed up human tongue covered in ketchup.

[-]

eyesotope86@reddit

Ah, the two key ingredients of a classic bolognese

It's a marvel it didn't turn out as nonna would've made it

[-]

GenTenStation@reddit

It’s like that time I made fried chicken with corn flakes and a cat

[-]

eyesotope86@reddit

'My duck á l'orange isn't turning out. I don't understand, I put the pork and Fruity Pebbles in'

[-]

dinklebot2000@reddit

Mmm...pork with a fruity Pebble crust.

[-]

ratliege_throwaway@reddit

well of course it didnt then oh my god

[-]

Makaloff95@reddit

I litterly said this out loud when i saw this lol

[-]

MishmoshMishmosh@reddit

My exact question

[-]

Practical-Secret2503@reddit

How does somebody know what "bolognese" means but not know the difference between ketchup and tomato sauce

[-]

ratliege_throwaway@reddit

if youre gonna do a lazy version, youre better off with some squeezy tomato paste and italian sausage. Slightly less lazy but slightly more accurate :")

[-]

SouthPawArt@reddit

You think this guy has tomato paste in their house or Italian sausage? 😂

[-]

SonTyp_OhneNamen@reddit

They presumably didn’t grow their ketchup and cat food at home, so the concept of grocery shopping can be expected.

[-]

SouthPawArt@reddit

Did you even read the post? By that logic, why stop at grocery shopping, op should have just gone straight to an Italian restaurant and ordered bolognese.

Like if they were so lazy/unmotivated to make or source anything better why is your response "well they should have just made or sourced something better."?

[-]

SonTyp_OhneNamen@reddit

The post is a title and an image, at least reddit doesn’t show me more. Did you make or source your info from their profile or…?

[-]

SouthPawArt@reddit

I read the comments.

[-]

SonTyp_OhneNamen@reddit

Which is why asking me if i read the post is a bit rich. There’s over 400 comments and i‘m not reading all that just to clown on OP accurately, but it’s cool that you got the determination to. Keep up the good work, champ.

[-]

SouthPawArt@reddit

I read like five comments in which the OP replied and got all the context necessary.

[-]

ratliege_throwaway@reddit

not going for whats in their house, just ... slightly more accurate and roughly about as obtainable

[-]

SouthPawArt@reddit

They weren't going for accuracy. They were hoping for the best with what they had on hand because they were too lazy or unmotivated to source anything better.

[-]

xenorous@reddit

Just like. A jar of sauce and nuke it. Would be better than this

[-]

DMMeThiccBiButts@reddit

squeezy tomato paste

..raw out of the tube? raw tomato paste is foul before you cook it out

[-]

ratliege_throwaway@reddit

i guess thats fair, bolognese i recall being a bit more tomato paste-y rather than like... marinara. but theres probably jarred bolognese too. i was just tryna think of specific replacements for the stuff shown haha

[-]

Witty_Primary6108@reddit

Is that cat food?

[-]

musictooloud-@reddit

is that dog food

[-]

vfx_soldier@reddit

I would eat it.

[-]

Max_mlr19@reddit

This can't not be raigebait, I refuse to believe

[-]

Afraid_Clothes2516@reddit

What are gods green earth made you think it would taste like bolognese

[-]

Own_Cardiologist2544@reddit

OP: Posts shitty food to a shitty food porn sub.

Reddit:

gif

[-]

sometin__else@reddit

i mean posting was fine, most of the issue comes with him thinking it would taste like bolognaise

[-]

ArDee0815@reddit

Tbf, that meat looked raw at first glance… =(

[-]

Own_Cardiologist2544@reddit

Hence, why it’s shitty food porn.

[-]

Lukanian7@reddit

Dear God

[-]

Eugenio507@reddit

This is so revolting it got me to stop scrolling and go be productive now, thank you

[-]

Big-War-7218@reddit

Dog food and noodles 😳

[-]

missnug@reddit

JAIL

[-]

Jumico@reddit

What the hell am I looking at

[-]

iggbyetn@reddit

This got me worried

[-]

DontLoveMeBack@reddit

did not expect to see mystery meat and ketchup today

[-]

goldbracelets@reddit

What the fuck am I looking at exactly

[-]

all3xi@reddit

JAIL.

[-]

Raverntx@reddit

gif

My cat said he likes your choice of friskies pate

[-]

anonthrowaway9283@reddit

Hey, I hate your pfp, just letting you know

[-]

Raverntx@reddit

That’s okay I forgive you 🙂

[-]

Original_Addition871@reddit

what the fuck is wrong with you

[-]

fascfoo@reddit

So glad someone said it. OP is just....not smart

[-]

Emm_withoutha_L-88@reddit

Charlie from IASiP is the OP

[-]

MonkeyBred@reddit

This is why words like egregious are added to the English language.

[-]

Drew_zero@reddit

Third genie wish used for a plate of ketchup and roadkill

[-]

Bubblesnaily@reddit

And some completely innocent and wholesome noodles.

Those poor noodles didn't deserve all that.

[-]

Drew_zero@reddit

🤣🤣🤣

[-]

No-Werewolf4804@reddit

Nothing, they were genetically engineered in a lab to piss off Italians.

[-]

azul360@reddit

I can literally hear my ancestors crying in the afterlife XD

[-]

Tamahfox@reddit

why do you expect ketchup and cat food to taste like Bolognese? just because it's near pasta doesn't mean things magically transform into pasta sauce.

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PaidToBeRedditing@reddit

bro, you're already taking the time to cook pasta. I would almost understand if it was a quickest possible meal to make with the ingredients you had, bunt you really stood there making pasta with no plan of the sauce.

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HighPressureShart@reddit

Did you cut the meat with your teeth and spit it out?

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Mark_d_K@reddit

Italians about to start some corned beef with you over violation of the term bolognese

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Alarmed_Material_481@reddit

So that's what spam looks like..... Is it raw meat?

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respawningAGAIN@reddit

i can’t tell if the uncooked meat or the ketchup is angering me more

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sleepytipi@reddit

🤢🤮

You'd be publicly executed for this in Italy.

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TheRealOgMark@reddit

The title is ragebait or OP is... Special

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UsefulEagle101@reddit

Wouldve worked better with a cream sauce imho.

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epic_meme_guy@reddit

Is that chewed up bologna?

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TheHorseCheez@reddit

Cat food with ketchup on cold noodles.

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tanzmeister@reddit

You know it's a good shitty post when you get a lot of down votes lol

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elrondx@reddit

It sure will taste like below knees

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SchmeppieGang1899@reddit

what even is that meat

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brownzone@reddit

I've described recipes as more like guidelines. You don't have to do everything in every step or have all the ingredients... OP, you should absolutely never deviate from any recipe. Ever.

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Troutmandoo@reddit

I’ll give you this: you saw the title of this sub and understood the assignment.

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Periwinkleditor@reddit

Have you considered stirring?

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Ras-haad@reddit

Allegedly they ate it just like that. https://postimg.cc/ZCtjph1p

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KermaisaMassa@reddit

Can I report this as abuse.

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Ras-haad@reddit

😂😂. I don’t think you can do anything about self harm. This needs an intervention. Or one of those hotline numbers

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umsamanthapleasekthx@reddit

A lesson in equating hope with expectations. F.

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SlapUglyPeople@reddit

r/shittyfood

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MexicanResistance@reddit

That pasta looks like the perfect level of overcooked (I like overcooked pasta)

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poops_tribeca@reddit

Get the outta here immediately

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jovanbeef@reddit

How does that make you feel?

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KakkMadda@reddit

What in the flying made you expect that?

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Desperate_Dingo_1998@reddit

Mine vs your cooking.

Step 1 for both of us - boil water then add pasta.

Step 2 for me - chop and onion and some garlic and cook in a pan then add mince and cook, then add a sauce and some herbs. Grab some pasta water and add to the sauce.

Step 3 for the both of us - wait for the pasta to finish cooking.

Step 4 for just you - add crap canned meat and ketchup to your pasta.

I don't understand. You can just cook some canned tomatoes with herbs with the pasta.

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Federal-Lobster905@reddit

gif

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NerdPunk63@reddit

ngl white macaroni taste so good when it's fresh and hot

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Proud-Leave3602@reddit

Yikes.

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cheechthebong@reddit

Hey have you been here before? Earth, I mean.

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AlexMW88@reddit

Literally the worst thing I’ve seen all year, congratulations.

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Familiar-Gap2455@reddit

Was it good

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RancidOoze@reddit

Maybe if I was from Iowa

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wIllyB085@reddit

I bet it tasted like bland noodles with ketchup and a hint of "meat". Kinda like a fruit flavored seltzer, the dry-ish fruit was squeezed next to the water on a windy day, enough flavor to know there is a flavor but not enough to tell what it is, and it doesn't taste good. Hard seltzer has more flavor than normal seltzer water and whatever that so-called "food" is. Hell, the photo paper probably tastes better than the actual stuff in the picture.

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LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Actually the taste ain't bad at all, I still enjoyed it.

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Lagerino@reddit

Siigghhhh.... at least now you know

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No_Nature6430@reddit

i hate you for this

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Shmulenzon@reddit

No shit, that’s crazy

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COPYxPASTE@reddit

Holy shit 😭😭

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Accurate-Midnight665@reddit

Why would you think that

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Remarkable_Toe_164@reddit

Thar be vinegar in them 'maters

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_Specific_Boi_@reddit

Thats what it would look like if British people invented it

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FerSzBae@reddit

Why did you do that? Don't you have ingredients where you live?

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TanjoCards@reddit

This is just sad bro like why you eating like shit

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triple7freak1@reddit

In Gordon Ramsay‘s words - FUCK ME

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MakkuroUsagi@reddit

We need a show segment: “Gordon Ramsey Reacts to r/shittyfoodporn subreddit.

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aspidities_87@reddit

gif

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Significant-Mud2572@reddit

Its just the camera pointing at the bathroom door and Gordon vomiting sounds.

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Silly-Pressure-4609@reddit

I don't know which watch list it is, but you need to be on it.

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AllEmbersGlow@reddit

Eww brotha

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_kurt_propane_@reddit

For bolognese you have to combine boloney and mayonnaise

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conversationhater@reddit

When people say love is an ingredient in food, what that may actually look like can vary. But the opposite of that is definitely this dish.

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terminalbungus@reddit

Did someone only describe bolognese to you in a hurry?

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Seygem@reddit

"This ain't spaghetti. This is army noodles with ketchup"

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DanglingTangler@reddit

You expected it to taste like bolognese? This is your fault.

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cheetos-and-coffee@reddit

ok I actual gagged at this one lmao

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AllThatGlitters00@reddit

I'm somewhat relieved I guess, that it's corned beef? I thought it was potted meat at first and shuddered. Hate hate hate potted meat.

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Razzamafoo@reddit

What the fuck

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trivetsandcolanders@reddit

This is like a dada art piece designed to look as unappetizing as possible

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FirstAd4000@reddit

In what world would that have tasted like anything close to bolognese?

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InSearchOfTyrael@reddit

well it's sort of red

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ThrowRA739477788@reddit

How do people like this even exist?

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CeciliaKris@reddit

Men

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Sad-Rush-9119@reddit

Is that wet dog chow?

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GayAssBeagle@reddit

Putting cat food on some noodles ain’t it

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Frothynibbler@reddit

I mean I have eaten the equivalent of this many times but idk why you would ever think it would taste like bolognese. I would add cheese. It’s not gonna taste like bolognese but it will at least flavor that amount of pasta better.

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Educational-Cherry27@reddit

Are you okay? If you want to talk just message me.

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Disastrous-Field5383@reddit

I would have expected cat food with ketchup

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RevolutionaryLet3826@reddit

*baloneys

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kawiz03@reddit

Right after I got here I ordered some spaghetti with marinara sauce and I got egg noodles and ketchup.

gif

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thishyacinthgirl@reddit

That reminds me of the time that I went to a Chinese restaurant and it was dark and sketchy inside, and I'm pretty sure the szechuan chicken was just chicken with spicy ketchup.

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portmandues@reddit

This reminds me of the time I went to Yan Can('t) Cook's "asian" restaurant and the chow mein tasted like noodles in a spicy ketchup sauce. It was like Chef Boyardee attempted to make Chinese food from a game of telephone and a vague description of the ingredients.

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notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Oh no! I was raised on Yan, I can't hear this about my childhood hero.

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portmandues@reddit

I doubt that the restaurant was really a reflection of his original cooking anymore.

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notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

No, I can see from his show that he's a great cook, but it's always a bummer to see someone slap their name on an inferior product. Lord knows all celebrity chefs love to do it, though.

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Larame@reddit

Reminds me of the time i went to grab a Döner Kebab in Germany and they put fucking mayonnaise on it. I'm not gonna name them as it's been years, and according to a friend that lives there they aren't doing that any more, but holy moly that trauma will never heal

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SirStocksAlott@reddit

Vague descriptions and generalities.

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portmandues@reddit

Well, if you added a dash of soy sauce to a can of Campbell's spaghetti (no meatballs) and a sprinkle of frozen carrots and peas you'd be in the ballpark.

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notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Huh, dark and sketchy is usually good for Chinese restaurants. I wonder if you got the white person menu. Where I grew up plenty of places only put bullshit stuff on the English menu, and have super good stuff on the Chinese menus.

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jojewels92@reddit

Cat food and ketchup on overcooked noodles was never gonna be close to a bolognese baby

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Drew_zero@reddit

That is a fucking war crime. The pasta has to have some kind of dressing or sauce on it. Lunch meat. ANYTHING. I will die trying to eat dry pasta unless I'm being waterboarded with marinara.

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DuckCleaning@reddit

The sad part is frying the corned beef would make it into a proper sauce. It has a lot of fat in it. Eating it cold is just wrong.

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it_follows@reddit

The pasta without anything on it is the most edible part of this

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PossiblyATurd@reddit

Mmm, cat food with noodles, topped with catsup.

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nhardycarfan@reddit

More like bolo NAY se

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monsune888@reddit

yah there’s a special place for people like you when we all eventually die

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Le_KinglySquirrel@reddit

Yeah you were fucking wrong, straight to jail

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Long-Refrigerator-94@reddit

Send this to pasta queen 🙅‍♀️

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Forward-Ad3434@reddit

I mean this with all of my heart.. I PROMISE that the half hour it takes to cook (a fuck ton of meals) is far more worth it than being "too lazy" to do literally anything outside of this.

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notabigmelvillecrowd@reddit

Yeah, you can have so many decent pasta sauces in just the time it takes to boil the pasta, make a puttanesca, that's literally what it's for.

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Capable_Square_9908@reddit

Im sorry for you

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Fun-Palpitation-5849@reddit

yummy

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superfirereddit@reddit

What is... "it"????

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showraniy@reddit

😐

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iamjustacowgirl@reddit

why the f

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DustyOldGhohst@reddit

ITT: everyone getting baited by an obviously shitposting trolling OP

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DoctorBlock@reddit

It looks like cat food and ketchup.

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Basketmetal@reddit

Some investment into learning how to cook goes a long way. You don't need a bolognese. If there's only corned beef and pasta, you can heat and crisp up the beef on a skillet. Towards the end add some butter and and paprika and whatever other seasonings you want. Follow with 1/2 cup pasta water and the pasta and stir and i think it you'd have a great dish in its own right. It may still seem like a lot of effort but after some cooking practice it will be as trivial as using a microwave

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MDawg1019@reddit

I’m generally a food slut but fuck that.

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UnclePjupp@reddit

Never go near a kitchen again.

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QuiMetit@reddit

What you should expect is for the authorities to be there soon.

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Disconfirm@reddit

gif

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Blueandigo@reddit

I thought that was potted meat

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AnInanimateExistence@reddit

Bowl of shit.

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demalo@reddit

Did you even try heating it up?

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Krypt0night@reddit

Why would you expect that lol

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Ok-Honey-9566@reddit

Oof really outed yourself as having absolutely no clue what you’re doing with food hey? Hahah. I don’t know how you could have thought that would taste like bolognaise. Have you eaten before?

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Hawkent99@reddit

Most Aussie reply I've seen on here haha

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Ok-Honey-9566@reddit

Hahaha, caught me!

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jasonjdf13@reddit

Omg 😆

Have you eaten before ?

Best reply by far

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GuyPierced@reddit

what the fuck

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celestialcranberry@reddit

Cat food and ketchup. Yum

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kinkywildrice@reddit

Yeah u wrong as hell.

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jivens77@reddit

Ingredients aside, I think the noodles to "sauce" ratio is off unless you were trying to thin the "sauce" flavors out to make it more edible.

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sortapunkrock@reddit

What fucking country is this

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SavantOfSuffering@reddit

Motherfucker is eating like he slithered out of an Eldritch plane and immediately cracked open the least stocked fridge on a remote island in the Arctic.

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garbage_queen819@reddit

Is any of this cooked

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hnc757@reddit

You're not in jail. There is no excuse for this.

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SavantOfSuffering@reddit

There's a good to fair chance you've killed an Italian or two simply posting this image.

What in the unholy fuck IS that?

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Steez_god_@reddit

I went from eating spaghetti with marinara sauce to egg noodles with ketchup type beat

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The_Poop_Shooter@reddit

let me just shoot a load of garlic spit on that.

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412Dude43@reddit

wtf am I even looking at?

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BarnacleKnown4386@reddit

How did you convince yourself to eat this 😭

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SirLanceOlaf@reddit

Could very well be all they had in their cupboard. Still rough to look at.

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BarnacleKnown4386@reddit

True I didn’t think of that

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jasonjdf13@reddit

💯You put that in front of me and I’ll catch a charge for sure .

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huge-gold-ak47@reddit

☹️

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Kn1ghtwing_@reddit

are you British by chance

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elephant_keys@reddit

The take out container and plastic bag makes it look you purchased this? Like did you actually order this and pay real money for it??

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ItsTheGreatBlumpkin_@reddit

gif

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36mintweezer@reddit

God, what have you done

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-DrunkRat-@reddit

OP, this is fucking atrocious, LOL

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EternalPilot@reddit

How?

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jshultz5259@reddit

Bologna and ketchup? Nope.

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confounded_norseman@reddit

Oh this is a common mistake. You just misheard. They must have said “moldy knees” not bolognese.

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Harmania@reddit

I legitimately felt a wave of sadness wash over me.

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SpanktheElephant@reddit

Idk what's worst! This or cream of chicken unheated corn tortilla enchiladas!

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doodleysquat@reddit

What’s the word for objectively, wrongly creative?

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Unhappy_Energy_741@reddit

Is there a sub for food worse than shittyfoodporn? Thats where this needs to be.

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Ras-haad@reddit

This should be on r/shittyfoodsnufffilm

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XRosexTattoox@reddit

That wouldn't taste like Bolognese in a billion lifetimes.😭😭😭

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a_reluctant_human@reddit

Butter and garlic powder on the noodles, fry the corned beef into something resembling food, ditch the ketchup.

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Lord_Phoenix95@reddit

In what reality would it taste like bolognese?

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Alewort@reddit

Learned the hard way your tongue can't taste anything if you remove it from your body, have you?

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Callmejiggity@reddit

Click bait

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limonhotcheetos@reddit

So have you ever had bolognese before or… ?

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Kelvax213@reddit

My god, this is a tough one to look at and read through

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limonhotcheetos@reddit

You thought what now?

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doobiebrother69420@reddit

Is that wet cat food with ketchup

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Soft_Chipmunk_8051@reddit

Truly shitty. Thank you 🙏

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meganjunes@reddit

You were?!! 😱

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Xogoth@reddit

"we do what we must because we can"

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CheskapOo@reddit

Did you shit your pants?

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FlamingoFrequent1596@reddit

The most infuriating part is there is no cheese with the macaroni

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Difficult_Bee_49@reddit

What the fuck is that

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Organic-Agency3106@reddit

gif

Bolognese?!

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Yoyo_Ma86@reddit

gif

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ilike2muchstuff@reddit

Dude come on😆

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meslyman@reddit

i feel like packaging can be so misleading lol.. what did it actually taste like though?

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LornaHex@reddit (OP)

Lol yes.

I'd rate it a 4/10 I guess. The taste kinda weird but still edible. I only ate half bcs I was to full. I'll probably eat the rest for lunch.

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PoopTransplant@reddit

That just looks wrong.

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TheS00thSayer@reddit

Because it is

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EducationalSoup83@reddit

gif

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BarnacleKnown4386@reddit

What the fuck 😭

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hallerz87@reddit

Time to stock up on a few jars of pasta sauce. Technically, you've cooked from scratch, which is the opposite of what you want to do when you can't be arsed to cook.

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MagicOrpheus310@reddit

Lol there is like two flavours there and one of them is water haha

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Successful-Theme8965@reddit

Ben B n his ccx DC MCs fed

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EsotericCrawlSpace@reddit

You’re going to taste bolognese when you least it expect it some time soon.

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Ok-Membership-5439@reddit

looks like raw sausage with ketchup and noodles, tell me it isnt that 😂

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Orgasml@reddit

They said it's corned beef.

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standardtissue@reddit

Fun fact, bolognese sauce is not made from bologna.

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Baconoid_@reddit

Ordered bolognese, got baloneys

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unicorntrees@reddit

Not spaghetti Bolognese, but add a few more ingredients and mix it all together in a pan and you got Jamaican spaghetti. https://www.allrecipes.com/recipe/11819/spaghetti-with-corned-beef/

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