No more tears does not mean "doesn't burn your eyes." It means that it doesn't tangle kids hair, so they won't cry when you're brushing out the rat's nest of tangles after bath time.
FYI
That's a myth, I've already linked in a few comments on this thread, vintage ads for Johnson & Johnson's baby shampoo where the actors literally say it won't sting the eyes.
Hijacking because jokes aside
###[Johnson & Johnson knew for decades that asbestos lurked in its Baby Powder](https://www.reuters.com/investigates/special-report/johnsonandjohnson-cancer/)
While true, that seems to be out of their hands, and from a different era of [taking responsibility](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_Tylenol_murders). More's the pity that things changed.
A friend works for J&J. While they were attempting to quietly settle a lawsuit, she informed me about the link between baby powder and cervical cancer, knowing most of us used it throughout high school to prevent chafing. It's mildly insidious.
That's a myth. There are YouTube ads linked in the comments clearly showing they're not pronouncing it that way and some even saying it literally doesn't sting the eyes.
"The light in the window is a crack in the sky..."
[https://youtu.be/CprfjfN5PRs?si=\_pssUyp1T2jy5VPR](https://youtu.be/CprfjfN5PRs?si=_pssUyp1T2jy5VPR)
Fun Fact: J&J and Elizabeth Johnson (family) is being investigated for their ties to Epstein.
The US Senate released this list of 58 of Epstein's business partners on September 2nd: https://www.finance.senate.gov/imo/media/doc/letter_from_senator_wyden_to_secretary_bessent_on_epstein_documentspdf.pdf
My friend's baby was washed with this stuff in the hospital and then her drug test came back positive. She had to deal with CPS as a new mom right after giving birth, it was a mess
Solidarity. And it took way too long for me to understand that it’s okay to start brushing at the ends and work one’s way up - my mom started at the root and yanked lol love her though
More broadly, beyond dunking on this specific brand: I've always side-eyed marketing slogans and advertisements, all my life. Like, I'm sure I got hyped by toy commericals as a kid, but in my adult life, I'd like to think I'm resistant to being swayed by ads, for stuff I'm not already interested in and/or predisposed toward.
Like, for example, when the news of Star Wars Episode I got announced, there didn't need to be any further convincing. I was obviously going to see a new Star Wars movie. But an ad for some random Arby's sandwich or dish soap brand is not going to make me suddenly go "I need that." Commercials are always a time to get up from the TV and go do something else. Ads are things to be skipped or muted.
Yes! I am generally turned OFF by media and marketing hype. I am quick to spread positive word of mouth when I experience a product or service that I love, but I am very suspicious of most forms of marketing.
This stuff didn’t actually bother my eyes. I remember being really young and my brother and I would get this stuff in our eyes on purpose and it didn’t burn at all. I cringe to think we actually did that but I guess we survived.
I remember my first grade teacher talking about how advertising manipulates us into wanting something. One of the few things I remember from first grade. And then my mother drove it home by asking me why Philadelphia-brand ice cream (it came in the big plastic tubs) was my favorite. Naturally it was because there was a pretty, doll-like Victorian girl on the label. She pointed out that having a cute mascot does not mean it's actually better ice cream. From then on I was more skeptical of advertising and more conscious of how it made me feel versus how I truly felt about a product.
I distinctly remember as a young child, while my mom was washing my hair with this stuff, opening my eyes to test and being EXTREMELY sorry that I did.
There is the moment in everyone’s life when you realize that Johnson and Johnson meant that it prevents *tears,* not *tears*. As in “tearing paper apart”
It’s the swindle of the century
I prefer Johnson & Johnson's [Nothing But Tears Shampoo](https://theonion.com/johnson-johnson-introduces-nothing-but-tears-shampoo-1819569996/) Gotta toughen those little rascals up.
Keep in mind I was somewhere between the ages of four and six when I learned this lesson. My mind was not so sophisticated nor aware of more global concerns.
https://preview.redd.it/5xgvbxuin82g1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=dd2289265653bc75c063ca58fb192a8e82851683
The biggest lie in all of marketing right here, that little half circle spout cutout NEVER works as intended
TIL yikes!...but sounds more like it was naturally occuring in trace amounts rather than deliberately included, but yeah that's pretty messed up since they knew and tried to cover it up. My mom died of mesothelioma, &#$@ all those corporations that knowingly left it in products without warning. I've definitely been exposed to asbestos from various products. I try not to think about it.
These MF’rs clearly wrote “No More Tears” like the liquid that comes from your eyes.
It actually says “No More Tears” as in tearing up a sheet of paper. As in: it deranges the hair.
This stuff hurt your eyes like every other soap.
It could be a false memory but I distinctly remember a mellow baritone voice in a commercial pronouncing "tears" as the things that drip from your eyes, not the thing that happens when you rip something.
It is "tears" as in crying liquid tears, but they are correct about it being about detangling. I used to watch my mom "brush" my sister's severely curly hair so hard until she was bawling from the tangles being pulled. That's the "tears" the slogan is referring to.
i seen a docu once. apparently it was originally meant to be tears, as in tearing the hair when you washed a childs hair....people read it wrong, the corps leaned in to the mistake...and here we are 100 yrs later.
I formulated the generic of this project about thirty years ago. The tears are caused by the huge amount of salt that is added to the formula to make it thick and aesthetically appealing. The surfactants in the blend are mild and pass muster individually when tested individually for eye irritation but the salt added to make it appealing to the buyer and end user burns your eyes.
lol. True story, as a baby, I drank some of this stuff. I guess it didn’t taste so awful.
But I am told I sneezed bubbles for around 24 hours!
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