Todays ration. Half a pack of powdered mash potatoes, with soy based butter flavored popcorn topping, and a can of beans i got from someone who was throwing them out.
Posted by elonmusktheturd22@reddit | shittyfoodporn | View on Reddit | 123 comments
Rainbow_In_The_Dark7@reddit
So how is the popcorn butter instead of normal butter on those potatoes? I always wondered myself but never tried it out yet. Does it work?
Those potatoes are actually pretty good, too. I get them often because I'm lazy and they're cheap and super quick to make.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Tastes like the soy based butter topping from kfc
As per potatos i have never bought powdered mash potatos. Everyone who gets them from thr food pantry throws them out, i don't go to pantry myself, just get them from people throwing them out. Do technically the only thing i paid for was the butter topping
chitzk0i@reddit
That’s a shame because Idahoan is head and shoulders above other powders.
NolieMali@reddit
And they're cheap. I made the loaded mashed potatoes last night because I was sick of Ramen. They were yummy.
BurmeciaWillSurvive@reddit
They have (mostly) resisted inflation, too! I picked up a bunch today for $1.27 because I took was tired of frozen veggies and ramen.
spookypepper@reddit
Idahoan baby reds are shockingly good.
ALWanders@reddit
They are decent when you want Mash quickly and without much work.
agoia@reddit
Way better than KFC mashed potatoes lol
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Lol.
I just laughed out loud because head and shoulders was the name of a dandruff shampoo
Remarkable-Hand-1733@reddit
Yea i like powdered mashed potatoes and their easy AF to make
FrontNegative8559@reddit
I know someone who used instant mash as a thickener in some recipes! Maybe recommend that to some people too if possible! They aren’t the greatest but can definitely be doctored up to eat on their own
MrStomp82@reddit
I've worked at restaurants that use powdered potatoes. With enough cream and butter you wouldn't be able to tell the difference.
kummerspect@reddit
They can also be mixed in with breading for a little extra flavor. I used to make chicken tenders breaded with a combination of panko and instant potato. It gave them a chippy flavor.
ALWanders@reddit
It does work pretty well, I always keep some non-flavored potato flakes for thickening soups and sauces.
Aware-Climate-8950@reddit
Me too. I made some soup tonight with leeks and powdered potatoes. Homemade chicken stock too, so yummy. I also love them baked with milk, butter and lots of cheddar.
theragu40@reddit
Wait people throw those potatoes out?? Why!
It's literally a staple pantry item in our house. We eat powdered mashed potatoes at least a couple times a month. Everyone in our family loves them.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Because beggars most certainly are choosers
My neighbor for example would go to the fp, then throw out all the stuff in cans and boxes, all the fish, just kept beef, pork, and chicken, dairy, and the cakes and donuts. She was as wide as she is tall and could est an entire family size bucket of kfc with the sides, by herself, then get into a fight with her daughter over the last donut in a 24 donut order from dunkin when they both whine about still being hungry after they each had a KFC family size bucket. Then she whines that the food pantry doesn't give them enough, comes to me claiming they are starving, then rejects what i have i can offer and whst she was really asking for was $200 cash to go get a bunch of steaks or takeout.
Food pantry gave out a lot of nutritionally sound stuff that was not fancy but everyone prefers to eat crap loaded in sugar and fat.
I don't associate with that neighbor anymore (used to ride to town with them. But they screwed me over too many times. Last one i bailed them out of a $3300 mess with national grid. Then they refused to make payments and blew their money buying more crap for themselves. I had to involve the law. She cried to everyone that i should have judt let her keep the money to help with her "mental health" because she was depressed after her divorce. Basically shrugged any responsibilities and focused on selfish bs. Both her kids abandoned her eventually too).
Anyway back before that mess i would just take the stuff they got but were going to throw out. A few Mennonites i know go to it and end up passing around boxes of stuff they don't want. 1 or 2 times a year one if them gives the accumulated boxes to me when they can't find anyone else who wants it. They won't throw it out because its wasteful, but they also don't want ut themselves. So when they drop it off its like a dozen boxes of potato flakes, bags if these smaller mixes, and usda cans of ground pork and no name brand canned corn (which is actually flavorless). Just the stuff nobody in a dozen Mennonite families wanted. I take it and add to my pantry because I'm not eligible for snap, can't get to food pantry, and have known hunger and desperation before so just stash it away.
theragu40@reddit
That's wild. I guess it's not shocking if I stop and think about it. But still pretty crazy on a surface level. Thanks for sharing, and I'm glad you can benefit from other people being picky.
Capt_morgan72@reddit
Ayyy it’s you again. You started drawing a comic yet?! I still think you’d be great at it.
rynthetyn@reddit
Jacques Pepin uses boxed potato flakes to make potato soup, so if potato flakes are good enough for a famous French chef, they should be good enough for anyone.
https://youtu.be/8esRoGQmOP8?si=KIVm1ZyB3J6rXizw
idiotista@reddit
Man, I really love your updates. I know you haven't led the easiest life, but I think you're an absolute inspiration. Make do with what you have, be an active part of the community, give and accept help without judgement. Everytime I see your posts, I get a warm feeling of knowing there are more people like me, people who adapt and adjust instead of throwing in the towel. Hugs from very afar, and take care of yourself.
so_it_goes17@reddit
I am sometimes on with money and like to cook quite a lot but I buy those dehydrated mashed potato packs. I make “real” mashed and other dishes out of potatoes but in a pinch?
to_annihilate@reddit
SAME. never understood the hate. They're easy, quick, and taste perfectly fine!
jojewels92@reddit
I haven't tried popcorn butter on potatoes but this brand makes a butter flavored popcorn salt that is very good! It's really concentrated, so you only need a little sprinkle of it- I've had my jar for 3 years and I'm down to about 1/4. I've put it on popcorn, corn corn, toast, mashed potatoes. It's not going to be a full substitute for butter but as far as adding a buttery salty flavor it's great.
Rainbow_In_The_Dark7@reddit
I had no idea such a thing existed and now I'm definitely going to look into that. It sounds like a awesome way to cut down on the amount butter I use in my household. Sounds so good for so many things!
jojewels92@reddit
I prefer the Amish Popcorn Company brand to Flavacol personally. But both very good×
Porkwarrior2@reddit
It's called Flavacol, and it's da'bomb.
https://www.amazon.com/Flavacol-Popcorn-Season-Salt-oz/dp/B081DM3CYV?refresh=1&sr=8-8
ALWanders@reddit
I have a bunch of Flavacol, why have I never thought to use it on things other than popcorn.
Porkwarrior2@reddit
It's like Butter MSG, lol.
I love me some corn on the cob when they're in season, oooohhhhh sooo goooood.
Just-Sock-4706@reddit
Forgot the name! Used to work at a movie theater and we'd add this to the oil in the ol' Cornado!
Rainbow_In_The_Dark7@reddit
Heck yeah! Thanks ♡
Eviltoast94@reddit
High key i love those potatoes, Im not exactly eating gourmet food but when I want a cheep and easy steak and mashed potatoes they work great
UnitedSentences5571@reddit
Too much of that liquid not-butter (and that looks like a little more than I would take at once) will give you the most god-awful horrible shits. Make you second guess every fart for next two weeks.
Successful-Phase1882@reddit
Ration?
wanderingsheep@reddit
If I'm remembering correctly, I think this is the guy who's saving up to pay off the Mennonites.
arnber420@reddit
You can’t just say that and give us no context man
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
I owe the mennonites $1800
Warm_Ad_7944@reddit
How the heck do you end up owing the mennonites out of all people?
thankyousnoopy@reddit
I have to google Mennonites
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
A very strict religion similar but not as strict as the Amish. Mennonites came first, Amish broke iff becsuse they didnt think it was strict enough.
No work on sunday. Strict agrarian living that prioritizes local community and self reliance.
Tankieforever@reddit
Boy can they run
shaun_of_the_south@reddit
Fuck can they run.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Im a farmer. The guy installed tile drain in my field in the spring. Cost $12k for the spring work and all my income goes to him to pay for it. I also had another replace the engine on my farmall 706 which cost $3500, plus he rebuilt my ford 641 over winter for $4500.
I have paid the guy with the excavator over $100k in the last 6 years (80% of my income) to do stuff like clear all the stumps from my field after i cut all the trees for it (sold the logs to an Amish sawmill), put in a root cellar, tile drain the field, put in a 1 acre fish pond that is fed by the tile line like a spring.
Basically i have them do a big project for 2 weeks then pay everything i got as a down payment and pay the rest as i can till its paid off, then save up for thr diwn payment of thr next project. They know me and my reputation is good so they trust me to owe them money, simply because 90% of any monty i bring in gets paid to them as i prioritize paying them off over anything else.
arnber420@reddit
What for man
Averagebass@reddit
Lovina Dicks
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
It started off as $12,000 back in the spring when i hired the guy to tile drain part of my field. Guy specialized in tile drain so he dug 6 to 13 ft deep trenches from one end of the field to the other, then ran a slotted pipe down the trench. Then filled it in again. This causes water to drain out of wet areas. The pipe acts like a spring to feed the 1 acre pond had them build incrementally between 2022 and 2024 ($45k overall to create the pond. I paid them over $100k for developing my farm since 2020. Clearing stumps, put in tile, build the pond, build my bunker, er um, i mean root cellar.
Another Mennonite rebuilt my tractor (needed a new engine) but i finished paying him off last month.
gilly_girl@reddit
Is the pond for aesthetics or will you be stocking it with fish?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Have 4 species of minnows (1 will take a hook and line). Got pumpkinseed and bullhead in it. I want bluegill nd largemouth bass but the nearest hatchery is 200 miles away, don't deliver, and i got no vehicle. Got what i got buying bait minnows in town or catching what was in the old quarry a mile down the road. I put ads up offering to pay $5 per live bluegill but everyone is too lazy to get paid to go fishing. Its illegal to sell bass in my state
Xfuck1tX@reddit
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Yup
liberatedhusks@reddit
They can’t feel hunger and plan out their once a day meals so they don’t die, if I read that bit correctly lol
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Yup thats me
redrowan3@reddit
Woah wait a second, what do you mean you can't feel hunger? My appetite has been dwindling to the point that I have to smoke weed to want to eat so I'm really curious about this
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Logging accident.
Tree fell on me in march of 2021. Half my spines bolted together now. Cervical and thoracic. Im locked into a painful hunchback shape now and a lot of nerves were severed. Partly numb on my left side. Haven't been able to feel hunger or feel full since the accident so i assume the nerves for that were severed. I forgot to eat for a week a couple times and then fainted to the floor when getting up from my recliner. So now i have to plan and schedule eating to make up for no internal means to regulate when to eat or when i had too much.
Im off grid in a small cabin, no vehicle. I get a ride to town once a month. No refrigerator. So i plan to avoid spoilage (use it before i loose it) to counter overeating (i have overate and spewed like a water balloon in a rush to finish stuff that would spoil if i keft it another day at room temperature)
HomeCat_@reddit
Out of curiosity do you sense thirst?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Yes i can feel that. Hunger is mostly felt as an ache ir hollowness in the stomach, combined with audible gurgling (i hear it sometimes but not feel it)
Thirst tends to be felt in the mouth ir tongue, dry mouth. I think because the mucus membrane in the tongue is so wet that when your dehydrated its the first place its noticable. Since my head was slighly above thr injufy i have full feeling there.
Top of my left arm has full feeling, bottom of the arm is numb or partially numb (like novacaine numbness). Numb armpit, back, chest, side, numb left leg. Water on the numb areas is felt as excruciating pain (i have partial feeling in some places) so rain feels like i kicked a wasp nest. If i am on my feet longer than 2 hours then my left leg looses responsivness and goes lame. Have to use a cane. So i have to limit myself when i go for a walk, no more than 6 miles a day. Farm work is broken up by short intervalls if work followed by 30-90 minutes laying down or in my recliner to recover then another interval of work.
I simply learned to adapt. Better than the alternative. Im a hunchback because they had so little to work with. Trying to move me into a good posture risk paralysis (paraplegic or quadriplegic) so i assume the surgeons just prioritized stabilizing my spine. Better to be as i am than be in a bed with no use if any limbs
HomeCat_@reddit
I’ve never actually thought about where the sensation of thirst comes from and how it differs from hunger. What you’ve described makes sense. It seems like you had to do a lot relearning and understanding your body post injury.
It’s weird how when there is a lessening or full lack of sensation the brain interprets that as pain, rather than any other type of sensation. It really sucks you’re dealing with all of this.
It sounds like you’re continually adapting and have found ways to make things work the best you can. I really admire your grit and attitude towards the situation you find yourself in.
HasNoGreeting@reddit
I know I'm telling you how to suck eggs; is it too wet where you are for some form of evaporation cooler?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Way too humid. The mountains to the south are not known as the abspestos forest for nothing
redrowan3@reddit
Wow man that's rough, power to you. Thank you for satiating my curiosity.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Planned in advance, controlled allocation of food.
PrudentAd3864@reddit
Looks like a park bench possibly homeless
ObiJuanKenobi3@reddit
Are you living in a fallout shelter?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Nope, just a shack in the woods far away from civilization and only go to town once a month
stopped_watch@reddit
How is it?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
I can't complain
stopped_watch@reddit
Sure you can. Who's going to stop you?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Whos going to listen? Or care?
My old shrink who treated my PTSD quit after she got secondhand PTSD listening to me talk about my childhood and teens and early 20s.
Backwoods hermits often don't have happy youths
InvestigatorOnly8517@reddit
Hey, I got two working ears. If you ever want to yap. I’ve got a shit up bringing too.
PrefrostedCake@reddit
Hope life is treating you better nowadays. Solitude can really bring a kind of peace that's extremely hard to find otherwise.
The potatoes look good.
Jeramy_Jones@reddit
Either you find peace or turn into the unibomber.
Lena-Luthor@reddit
on one hand you can say you won at therapy ig. I feel like that legally makes you a therapist
NinjaRose23@reddit
I have an acquaintance who's a backwoods hermit, I enjoy listening to him talk so much!
Same thing, PTSD (in his case the Army and what happened during training).
christineyvette@reddit
I care. Hang in there, friend.
stopped_watch@reddit
Happy to give you a virtual hug.
Grape-Snapple@reddit
well been watching u since u posted a lettuce-less beet and pecan salad
thesplendor@reddit
Im also staying in a shack. on the coast, and granted I can go to town more often. but damn. why not just get real butter and a sack of potatoes?
Electrical-Title-698@reddit
Teddy K is that you?
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Naw, im more like jason v. I prefer a machete
SnackPocket@reddit
Oh hellllllll yes.
Techienickie@reddit
he doesn't but the rabbit hole that his post history is an amazing journey
allhailglob@reddit
i have that same plate and it is one of my favorites
itsmevichet@reddit
Confession: instant mashed potatoes punch way above their weight in terms of tastiness.
Boots_in_cog_neato@reddit
My mom accidentally made instant mashed potatoes with vanilla silk milk once…. Honestly, it slapped.
Jeramy_Jones@reddit
Never tied them, but I’m always surprised how good instant stuffing is.
xenorous@reddit
Yeah. No where near homemade. Usually not as good as a family restaurant.
But. Better than most chains. Way better than fast food if you spice them up
SirBruceForsythCBE@reddit
"Better than most chains"
It's a low bar, dude.
KittenPurrs@reddit
For real. I made mashed potatoes from scratch the other day (mostly by accident) and realized it had been years since I made them rather than churching up a packet of instant. Don't get me wrong, they were fantastic, but not justifiably better for a side dish on a weeknight.
rwx_0x6@reddit
Something about this reminds me about Vienna sausages. It looks normal but when you look at the ingredients it lends credence to the bad taste.
wavdaily@reddit
mega-d-lux@reddit
As things currently stand, Americans will only able to afford Beans and Potatoes this year
No_Walrus7704@reddit
YOU NAME IT!!
My_Favourite_Pen@reddit
no one has spit harder bars than this woman.
RoachGirl@reddit
I love seeing her pop up a bunch this time of year
Sargash@reddit
https://www.findhelp.org/ hopefully you or someone else can use this resource to have at least one less hungry day
Jeramy_Jones@reddit
This is fucking bleak. I hope you can get some fresh food soon, fam. For now at least you won’t starve, but scurvy is on the horizon.
manwhowasnthere@reddit
if you squint it kind of looks like a dark souls boss
theblondebasterd@reddit
Cheers man. You sound like a god damn trooper, I hope your homestead turns out as beautiful as you envision.
SlobberyCargo@reddit
Ain't gonna lie man, I'd eat that. I'd probably enjoy it too.
Argentus01@reddit
You should check out Flavacol!
GravyPainter@reddit
Instant mash have a weird taste to them, but overall i can eat the crap out of it
relayrider@reddit
throw in some powdered milk and real butter...
Defiant-Pin-6771@reddit
Can't eat what you don't have. You have taters and beans, so you got some carbohydrates and protein. Honestly, this looks similar to my lunch most days at work.
Environmental-Hour75@reddit
I actually like powdered potatoes, and LOVE backed beans... I would definitely not do the fake butter thing though... I'm fine with just salt/petter and no butter, or I'd go with real butter. We used to buy canned butter for living off-grid (camper/RV).
Roscoe182@reddit
An English people get shit for apparently eating bland food.
Averagebass@reddit
This dude needs a movie based on his life and deserves millions in royalties from it.
Suspicious-Tailor436@reddit
Smash. Next question.
dolo_ran6er@reddit
Nice bean save dude.
The_RedShadow@reddit
r/pareidolia
Fluffy_Muffins_415@reddit
Looks good to me, raw red onions would be a great addition
lisa111998@reddit
Yes! And onions belong on practically everything :)
its10pm@reddit
Ice cream?
gilly_girl@reddit
Yes.
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Long ago when i was a tribal forester (worked as a forester on tribal land) i woild occasionally get an omlet from a diner next to the office if the wildlife technician was getting takeout (we shared a 10x10 office). I had them loaded with so many onions that the building was evacuated 3 times by my many coworkers running out crying. The director implemented a no onions in the building rule.
Environment division actually got expelled from the tribal office complex after fish samples caused the facility to be fumigated (interns left them on the table in the lab on a Friday afternoon. Building had to be fumigated. Env. Got its own building a mile away after that)
I loved parks and recreation since its the most accurate portrayal of a government office in the media
messedupmessup12@reddit
Depending what kind of beans those are you can post in shitty vegan food too
drcmr@reddit
Says pork and beans = queen bean
elonmusktheturd22@reddit (OP)
Nope, can said pork and beans
SaralasDevonshire@reddit
If you're talking rations, I get the struggle, I see a valid source of protein, I see carbs, I see fats, I see fibre. Dude/dudette, if we're talking rations, you're eating a meal that seems to be filling (I hope), and you are hitting a lot of the marks! I hope you are able to eat veggies and fruit, but if that's currently not possible, this is not shitty food!
hangry_hangry_hippie@reddit
Mashed
OGdirty1Kanobi@reddit
PORK AND BEANS!
Moto_Glitch@reddit
Sometimes you gotta eat what you have, nothing wrong with that if it's filling and tastes good 👍
plants11235813@reddit
Id gobble that up
nehla01@reddit
YUMYUM!!