No pans. No airfryer. Hairdryer worked surprisingly well. I will be doing this again
Posted by Clover-Magpie16@reddit | shittyfoodporn | View on Reddit | 87 comments
Pesto, Colby Jack and Turkey
713nikki@reddit
I like that you said “fuck it, I’ll just blow dry my bread in the bathroom.”
gawdpuppy@reddit
right next to the trash can
713nikki@reddit
I spent more time zoomed in on it than I’d like to admit.
Anyway, (and this is totally unrelated) did you know that pinworm infections are really common in the US? It’s estimated that there are 40 million active cases right now! Lots of people don’t know they have it, and wonder why their butthole is so itchy!
People get pinworms by accidentally swallowing tiny, microscopic eggs. The eggs are spread through direct transfer from person to person or indirectly from contaminated surfaces like clothing, bedding, and toys. Infection typically occurs when an infected person's contaminated hands touch their mouth, or when a person touches a contaminated object and then puts their fingers to their mouth when they’re eating a hair dryer sandwich that they prepared in the bathroom.
Dirt-bikeraver90@reddit
This shit sounds like an episode of futurama lol
lunazar786@reddit
Just eat papaya seeds. It's the best de-wormer😜
damiandarko2@reddit
this sent me down a very concerning rabbit hole
713nikki@reddit
Now that you’re informed, how much do you bet OP has an itchy backdoor?
Salt_Freedom3237@reddit
I unfortunately had pinworms earlier this year and would not wish them on my worst enemy! Children are more likely to get them from what I know since they tend to touch everything and put dirty hands in their mouth, but I have no children so no idea how or where I got them, maybe at work or at the grocery store or something.
It takes 2-3 weeks of having to change bedsheets, towels, all clothing daily, disinfecting your home, cleaning under nails with a brush after each time you use the toilet, plus anti-worm medicine, to get rid of them. It’s such a hassle.
destinyeeeee@reddit
So you're telling me I could make new friends
713nikki@reddit
Yes! To introduce yourself, just get a good flashlight and squat over a mirror at night. Or when you wake up in the morning, firmly press a piece of tape across your backdoor.
HuntingForSanity@reddit
I’ve been firmly pressing a piece of tape to my butthole every morning for most of my life and I still don’t have friends
713nikki@reddit
Maybe you should seek friends by luring them in with a promise that they could do your morning backdoor taping?
Humble_Fishing_5328@reddit
that method always works for me 🙏
epigenie_986@reddit
Love how this is shittyfoodporn and people are mad it’s in the bathroom 😂
SpeedBlitzX@reddit
Call me crazy but in this day and age couldn't you get an inexpensive frying pan at the dollar store or the thrift store then just clean it up real nice
AppUnwrapper1@reddit
You can get a pan at Marshall’s for like $10.
SpeedBlitzX@reddit
Exactly!!
Instead of using a used hairdryer getting who kno2s what on those sandwiches.
SanchoPanzaLaMancha1@reddit
I think this is at a hotel or something
Faendol@reddit
An air fryer is like 40 bucks from Costco... You may want to consider that as your long term solution.
EmergencyGrocery3238@reddit
Now what do you do with all the dry hair on your toast?
trackdaybruh@reddit
FYI: Notice how the intake of hair dryers are covered in years of dust, lint, and other build ups from being sucked in? Well, you just blew some of them onto your food
SirStocksAlott@reddit
Deep deep DEEP into the sandwich with the heat and air flow. So not just on to, but into.
ActorMonkey@reddit
Oh I’m sorry- is this /r/TastyFoodThatsNotDirty ?
No it’s not.
DezPispenser@reddit
so you enjoy shit on your food? and dust? dried skin flakes? must i go on? just say you have a fetish like damn.
ActorMonkey@reddit
I’m speaking to the vibe of the sub. Not to the vibe of my real life existence, you doorknob.
Takklemaggot@reddit
doorknob.. lol
Sailed_Sea@reddit
Yes this is the shity food suplbreddit, did you not get the memo?
Bovoduch@reddit
We call that seasoning here
Estrellathestarfish@reddit
In the bathroom too, a great place for food preparation
QueezyF@reddit
Mmm, shit flavored toast
justlookinaround11@reddit
do you guys really need to shit on the food they just inadvertently shit on?
QueezyF@reddit
Yes
justlookinaround11@reddit
good
Not-a-bot-10@reddit
Def ate some poop particles
SupernaturalPumpkin@reddit
I feel like someone who is doing this probably isn't worried about that.
Ok_Distance_far@reddit
The picture does not show this and wear and tear does not show that assumption to be remotely stated or true.
trackdaybruh@reddit
A fan + hairdryer "filter" will definitely collect dust among other things
Ok_Distance_far@reddit
Product in my experience would show in the heated front. There is no evidence this hair drier is not mostly new.
You are just being a pube. It's not ideal. No. But nobody is trying to cook with a hair drier if a better option.
FoldyHole@reddit
The better option is just eating the sandwich cold. There’s no need to “cook” it.
Ok_Distance_far@reddit
You are spoiled
shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit
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trackdaybruh@reddit
You forgetting what sub you are on? This is r/shittyfoodporn. People posting bad looking food intentionally or cooking food this way just for upvotes isn't a rare occurrence
Ok_Distance_far@reddit
It is shitty. Just on its own.
Maybe ask your parents to teach you how to cook or buy you food. They probably will go buy it.
shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit
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trackdaybruh@reddit
All I did was point out that dust and lint will be blown on the food if hairdryer is used, and you attack me for that? It doesn't make sense
Ok_Distance_far@reddit
If you're cooking food with a hair drier you aren't thinking of caring about your air quality.
shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit
Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.
Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.
shittyfoodporn-ModTeam@reddit
Insults towards posters and other commenters will be removed, and you may be banned.
Racism, bigotry and hate of any sort will result in an immediate ban. Bans may be over turned upon appeal.
TanjoCards@reddit
Dork alert
SaltyBeaver-@reddit
Extra protein
shinichimechazawa@reddit
thats flavor baby 🤌
-earthmovers@reddit
what do you mean no pans. go get one
I_Am_A_Goo_Man@reddit
The power usage cost more than the sandwich
HDpotato@reddit
dollar store searzall
str8bear72@reddit
Yes an iron would have been faster
floweryreign@reddit
Why are you in the bathroom?
notcuteonlypsycho@reddit
OP’s taking the shitty in r/shittyfoodporn literally
frostysauce@reddit
You could have eaten that sandwich cold. I mean, I'm sure you did anyway, but you could have eaten pesto, colby jack, and turkey without trying to heat it.
EdwinMcduck@reddit
People out there practicing for Cutthroat Kitchen, and that show ended in 2017.
99-dreams@reddit
...are you competing on Cut Throat Kitchen? Lol
I_DRINK_GENOCIDE_CUM@reddit
Cute plate <3
oliveoilcrisis@reddit
Don’t…
United_Ring_2622@reddit
You can eat sandwiches cold with significantly less shame
nohumanape@reddit
A hot pan is too much effort?
radroamingromanian@reddit
Ah I remember when they did shit like this in Cut Throat Kitchen.
LibrarianNo6865@reddit
So. If it did do a really good job. Why exactly isn’t there a second photo of its really good job?
FormingTheVoid@reddit
No oven?
Donvack@reddit
If you have an iron that works even better. Wrap it in aluminum foil and iron both sides for 2-3 minutes each. It’s almost exactly like a panini press.
joyeleanor@reddit
At this rate, I doubt OP has the will to search for aluminum foil
Alive_Setting_2287@reddit
And literally so much more hygienic. I can only imagine all the dust that cycling in a 3 star hotel bathroom. Straight up blasted to the surface of one of the most porous food delivery systems.
NVM, I'm sold.
Supper_Champion@reddit
Not a chance this person "cooked" or "toasted" this bread with a hairdryer. At best, they dried the surface for internet points.
jewstylin@reddit
Rat girls eat better than this.
IceCoughy@reddit
dexties@reddit
An air fryer does the same thing as convection oven, just faster cause it's smaller. Also, any type of oven would have worked
ruttettur@reddit
I grilled my cheese sandwich once over an older model construction light, one of the best sandwiches I've ever had.
Still think about it sometimes
thisisnotme78721@reddit
this offends god
3-goats-in-a-coat@reddit
A hairfryer you say?
Gold_Sky1097@reddit
Unusual_Plum_4630@reddit
May I ask why?
MerryBerryMudskipper@reddit
The line between genius and insanity is very, very thin indeed
Consistent_Sail_6128@reddit
MMM! I love a side of staphylococcus with my sandwich! /s
happyandveg@reddit
is it supposed to be a grilled cheese or do you just like your sandwich warm?
Imaginary-Cricket903@reddit
I love that plate
man__i__love__frogs@reddit
First thoughts are a lot of bacteria is being blown through that.
FinnBalur1@reddit
This is a sure way to get sick
Miora@reddit
You and my have to do it in the bathroom
Gloomy-Restaurant-42@reddit
They use the commercial-grade kind in the restaurants that serve these sandwiches.