ULPT - how to make inside of someone's car damaged and/or smell really horrible
Posted by kittiesarelove@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 112 comments
I'm looking for things I can do while in the backseat of someone's car to make it smell or cause damage that will cost money to clean. Needs to be something they won't notice until I exit the car. Ideas?
Ambrose_Bierce1@reddit
Can of Surströmming.
GuestStarr@reddit
Don't do this if you are not 100% you won't be caught. Buying a new car won't be enough, there will be some mental health damage to the target and you'll be paying for the therapy. The junk guys picking up the car wreck will also need hazmat suits and you'll pay for that as well.
verge_ofviolence@reddit
Just leave an egg in theee
Bluto58@reddit
Go to a hunting/fishing store and buy a little squeeze bottle of fox urine. Comes in a little 2oz bottle with a flip-up spout. Hunters use it as a cover scent. It’s truly horrible. If you get a whiff of it you will gag. Just drip it down inside the rubber window molding at the bottom of the glass into the door. I can’t stress enough how awful this stuff smells. They won’t be able to find the source. It’s actually better if you can douse the carpets and upholstery if a window is cracked. You can also pour it into the air intake below the windshield.
GuestStarr@reddit
Or spray some on the brake discs. The smell of burning fox urine every time they use the brakes would be .. odd. They'll never know someone did it on purpose. A male dog or fox could well lift his back foot and squirt some around anywhere just because he can. And how do I know? A random dog did it to my car. I saw it but was just a little bit too far to hush it away before it did the trick. It took about two weeks to wear off.
Msktb@reddit
I got a single drop of that stuff on my skin once and it took hours to get the smell out, scrubbing with watered down bleach finally helped. Can confirm it is one of the most violent smells that can assault your senses.
GuestStarr@reddit
My cow orker once left a half eaten chicken sandwich in its triangular plastic package under the front seat. It started to smell after a while and a few more days later I was ready to tear out the innards of the car to find the source. Luckily after finding and removing it the smell was soon gone. I never gave him a ride after that. Asshole.
heyitscory@reddit
Give him the old Toledo Sunroof.
dclarkwork@reddit
What's a Chicago Sunroof? Is it like an upper decker?
X-Lrg_Queef_Supreme@reddit
Slippin' Jimmy made a brown through the sunroof of a car
Thunderboltpier@reddit
There was a level of tint on the windows that I'll maintain to this day was NOT legal on an Illinois licensed vehicle.
InstructionFair1454@reddit
Get a syringe, fill it with milk, inject into seats. It will stink like hell, without any aparent reason
Adventurous_Bonus917@reddit
make ice cubes from fart spray. near-impossible to clean out and totally rank, though they might thaw too quickly if it's more than a 10 or 15 minute ride.
mikewilson2020@reddit
Prawns or as you lot call them... shrimp...
Stash them in all the nooks and crannies...
2/3 days later its a write off
LonesomeBulldog@reddit
Not in the backseat, but under the windshield there is plastic cowl you can pop off. The air intake(for the AC) is here. Place some raw shrimp or chicken there and reinstall the cowl. I had a rat die there once and didn’t find the source of the smell for a week. The dead rat odor lingered for over a year.
DG_FANATIC@reddit
Get a mason jar and fill with milk and chicken breast and then put a lid on it. Hide it in a backpack when you get in the car so they don’t notice it and ask obvious questions. Then when they’re not looking put it under the passenger seat. The gas build up will eventually break the glass jar and will let out rotten milk and chicken breast smell in the car.
palindrome4lyfe@reddit
You could also get a syringe, inject the foul concoction tight into the seat padding. Or, just use milk to keep it inconspicuous at the time of planting. It'll go bad soon enough.
Daitheflu1979@reddit
Did this in college years ago, can confirm it’s grim!!
Pro tip, add a few prawns or some fish sauce into the jar too!
Known-Skin3639@reddit
Use tuna and or sardines in oil in a not tight and not to loose jar. Heat will make it seep out enough to contain the stank in a small spot. Use a plastic container with a tight fitting lid and the heat and rot will let it basically explode. The oil will make it near impossible to clean so they will have to replace anything the oil gets in. You can also pour said oil in the cowl vent up front under the windshield. If they use the fresh air setting it will instantly smell like that fish oil. I’ve done both. My folks knew I was a creative little dude. I took that creativity to the dark side. If I like or love you life is good. If I don’t…… well shit happens if warranted. 😂
Read_it_all-7735@reddit
Yeah, fresh sea life does not stink that badly but even a tiny bit of it starts to smell like rotten garbage after a few days, especially in a hot car.
Once upon a Time in the military, one of my friends put shrimp down the curtain rods in another guy‘s room. He hit a few other shrimp and easy to find places like under the bed and underneath the sink. He couldn’t find the ones in the car, Rodney ended up having to move rooms
spotpea@reddit
We had a fridge break while away with some shrimp in the freezer. When my then husband opened it for the first time he immeduately turned around and spray vomited violently at the smell.
Daitheflu1979@reddit
Wait, I have another idea. Sprinkle grass seeds along the stitching of the seats in the car, down the back of the seats etc. Then get a spray bottle, fill it with water and spray the seats liberally and in a week grass will be growing from the seats, assuming they are not leather seats. The roots of the grass should lock into the stitching making it a pain to remove! Also works great on keyboards!
ExcellentHunter@reddit
Holy cow, this will be revolting. Should be treated as bio weapon 🤣
AnimalAkaWillum@reddit
Satan has entered the thread.
The_Queer_Peer@reddit
r/foundsatan
redskelton@reddit
It's going to clunk around when it is being driven so be sure to wrap it in a sock or something. The jar, not the chicken
sensualcolonoscopy69@reddit
This way if they try to grab it they’ll just get the sock and not the jar
dclarkwork@reddit
I understood this reference.
Along with like every other Redditor
ACynicalOptomist@reddit
Double bag it in ziploc bags.
LostAnxiety3229@reddit
Broken glass can really hurt someone. Use a latex glove or balloon instead
Socratesticles_@reddit
But that wouldn’t burst
LostAnxiety3229@reddit
Trust me, it does. I mean, if you want someone cleaning it up to potentially get a severed artery, bleed out and you get a murder rap, be my guest.
Socratesticles_@reddit
And salmonella
LostAnxiety3229@reddit
I'm assuming they aren't going to eat it.
Socratesticles_@reddit
Raw chicken breast out cooked? Whole milk?
theepi_pillodu@reddit
r/foundsatan 😂
YourWeekendDad@reddit
Came here to post this. This is diabolical in the summertime.
jefferson497@reddit
Spray fish attractant is bad. You can easily spray it anywhere
glimmergirl1@reddit
Leave a bag of frozen cow kidneys under the seat from a butcher that you were going to cut up and feed to your cat ...ask me how I know.
cascasrevolution@reddit
fish
Bosswashington@reddit
Thioacetone. Apparently the smell is “fearful”. It’s so abad that the act of uncorking the bottle for a few seconds caused vomiting a half a mile away. Thioacetone is so stinky that it can make you pass out, ***FROM THE ODOR ALONE!!
Thirdeye74@reddit
Smear Vaseline all over their windshield, it’s a mess
S_A_R_K@reddit
Find the dirtiest homeless person you can and have sex with them in the car. Twice
Front_Map_5@reddit
Take the fish out of a tin of sardines but leave the oil. Pour it in the vents up on the dashboard by the windshield. They will have to sell the vehicle, you cannot come back from this. I know because when I was growing up a friend did this to my sister’s truck.
whydya-dodat@reddit
This is one of those situations where milk in a syringe works wonders. Bring several for multiple injection sites. Get every seat. Bonus: leave the needles in the car so that they can be found if the car is ever searched.
JimmyCYa@reddit
Bobcat piss.available online.
pfizzy70@reddit
Tinned fish, ground into the carpet under the driver's seat.
Beetlelarva42069@reddit
In the ac vents
KittyKattKate@reddit
Get a tube of roach and moth pheromones
Motor_Lengthiness_39@reddit
If you really wanna be that petty dm me i know everything abt ts
Angry_bubba@reddit
I'm sure already said, but a frozen shrimp or two tucked in a few places.
Own_Plantain_9688@reddit
Tuna oil from the tuna can. Oil is so hard to clean
aguyindenver62@reddit
In junior high we put a fresh fish under the passenger seat of a teacher we all hated. Apparently it was quite effective...
rational_actor_nm@reddit
crush a shrimp under his window seal into the interior of the door. some door panels have a hole that leads to the interior of the door where the handle is in older cars. put some under the back bench seat, just stuff them up under there. add some chicken
iwearstripes2613@reddit
A small side of blue cheese dressing left under the passenger seat of a car could literally total the car. It will cause mold spores to start growing everywhere in the car. It’s absolutely disgusting.
I used to clean cars at a car rental place. We had one come back like that. It was one of the grossest things I’ve ever seen.
That was a wild job some days.
EdgeLordPrime859@reddit
Hide small fish. Complete fish, not just filets.
Tuck these fuckers everywhere. With a small shoving object and 10 minutes, you can ruin someone's life for about a month.
headnt8888@reddit
I dunno why you want punishment someone give you free ride.
Man you just Lost 1 Million Free rides forever.
Fuck you.
zebenix@reddit
A boyfriend of my neighbour kept parking his car in my spot on a private driveway. I asked AI where the air intake was on his BMW model was for the air-conditioning. It was between the windscreen wipers. I poured a pint of milk there. A few days later he had a replacement car for a few days
green_prepper@reddit
You can pour glitter in there too
dclarkwork@reddit
WOAH! WOAH!!! He asked how to ruin a CAR, not the rest of their lives
Thatguy468@reddit
Pour a small amount of water mixed with sugar and yeast into the air vents in the backseat. Will attract bugs and begin fermenting as well.
BigRedWhopperButton@reddit
Day one: "Wow, it smells like a bakery in here!"
Week one: "Huh, it smells like a brewery in here."
Month one: "Yuck, it smells like a vinegar in here🤢"
V8FTW@reddit
Milk poured discreetly under the front seats or under the floor mats. It won't smell right away, but after a couple of days it will stink.
KudaMuda@reddit
Liberal amounts of fart and/or deer rut spray. Bonus points for getting the liquid into the vents.
LongjumpingRespect96@reddit
I was going to suggest exactly this. Use it a syringe and spray it deep into the air vents.
Far_Eye_3703@reddit
You can crack eggs under the front seat.
Big-Pain-7383@reddit
Shrimp juice in the carpet. Will never come out
Flux_My_Capacitor@reddit
Milk can and will total a car.
So, you better be sure you’re not going to get caught if you go the milk route.
Sensitive-Pop-4323@reddit
Frozen shrimp will take time to thaw, giving you ample time to egress the vehicle.
Read_it_all-7735@reddit
They honestly take a day or two to really get the stink up
UntestedMethod@reddit
Go for a long game of secretly introducing enough moisture that it produces mold. An added bonus is it can get the windows nice and foggy in the mornings.
Ideally you can find a few discrete places to add the moisture, but you'll probably need to really soak them in order for the mold to come.
If they bring it to a shop to find the moisture source it could be a time consuming thing for the shop to take apart interior paneling, etc. Even more costly if they actually go ahead and replace any of the moldy interior parts.
UserZero541@reddit
A small pipe or flexable tube. A weed sprayer. Use concentrated fox urine you can pick it up at most hunting stores or order it off of Amazon. Mix it in a weed sprayer Insert the tube through the window and the door Pillar. Let the sprayer do its thing. The car will never be the same.
Badkus757@reddit
Let fish sit in a cooler all summer long. Eventually there will be no fish, just white colored liquid that will make you gag from a block away
Ragnar_of_Ballard@reddit
Large frozen fish
Queasy-Sentence446@reddit
Fill a spray bottle with milk and spray the entire interior of the car
Hopeful-Chef-1470@reddit
coyote piss. not only will it make the car reek, your target will also suddenly have new friends at night waiting by their car (and pissing on it)
MikelarlHaxton@reddit
I used to manage a transportation company and the answer is milk. Dead meat smell disappears after a while, but spilled milk is a years long journey. In one car a toddler got the top of her milk cup and spilled it in the back seat crease and we ended up selling the car. Like rotten feet and vomit.
dietspritedreams@reddit
Oh god I read this as cat…
Additional_Bread_861@reddit
Buy a bottle of “liquid ass” and put it into the passenger side windshield near the wipers
bcardin221@reddit
Sardine tin up under the front seat springs
Electrical-Pool5618@reddit
Get 3 cans of cheap shaving cream cans and put them in a freezer. Leave them there for days. I’m taking ICE SOLID. Get them to the target vehicle in an iced cooler keeping them as cold as possible. Access inside of the car and use a nail to poke several holes in the cans. Throw them under the seats and leave. As the cans warm, the shaving cream expands and expands (out the can holes) and makes a real mess. 3 cans of shaving cream can not only fill the car to the headliner but can also blow out windows.
Hectic_Halloween@reddit
Fart spray smell like something literally died. Spray in the intake for the air vents.
samsbamboo@reddit
Wrap an old potato in a thin layer of plastic wrap and hide it in the car. It'll take at least few days to rot, and rotten potatoes smell awful.
Charlie24601@reddit
The Cheesewagon (tm)
Get a big hunk of cheese. Chop it into 1 inch-ish cubes. Place cubes in tailpipe. Use long stick to push them up into the muffler.
The cheese will melt and burn on. Car won't smell right for ages.
PerformerOk450@reddit
A friend of mine had a driving school, when he left his wife of 30 years she secretly kept his spare car key, woke up one morning to find "someone" had opened his car and spread jars of mayonnaise and prawns all over the dashboard, seats, windows, carpets and then locked it back up, he said when he opened the door the smell was what he imagined will great those who go to hell, despite much cleaning and spraying of detergents he said there was always a slight smell on sunny days.
RPK79@reddit
Piss disks.
mr_k_uk@reddit
You forgot the liquid ass
onecovfefeplease@reddit
I think the safest bet is a piece of raw chicken dropped between the seats or in the gap where the seat belt comes out. Fresh, raw chicken should be nearly odorless for whatever amount of time you need to spend between your fridge and exiting that car and if you have it in your pants pocket any juice washes out easily. You act like you're checking your pockets right before you unclip your seat belt and plop that bish right into the gap. I'd guess a piece no smaller than the size of a bottlecap but not larger than a bank card ought to work. Too small and it might dehydrate before it rots. Too large and it might be found too easily.
Milk won't be an easy delivery and even a syringe takes a few seconds to get the cap off and back on again.
All of the rut juice and seafood options are gonna be immediately apparent the second you open the container (idk about everyone else but I can smell frozen shrimp before it's even out of the bag).
chutenay@reddit
Hide a couple of potatoes under the seats- in a week it will be unbearable, and they’ll think they just forgot a few of their own potatoes
foresight310@reddit
Frozen can of shaving cream under the seat. Best to puncture it a bit and it will start expanding as it thaws.
moosemoose214@reddit
If piss disks ever had a purpose……
SAD-MAX-CZ@reddit
1) Find cabin air intake. 2) Squeeze roadkill juice in there.
Dorjechampa_69@reddit
Deer scent works pretty good. A couple squirts on the intake of the cabin air filter and you are good. Pick it up at any hunting store.
whykickamoocow8@reddit
Here is a good one.. get a few prawns / shrimp and some pins.. push the pin through the prawn / shrimp and then reach under the seat and attach it in the middle underneath the chair.. the heat from a car in the sun. 😳
januaryemberr@reddit
Inject shrimp with milk. Or marinade them in it. Put them inbetween the seats. Some lift up a little and you can get under the padding. No smell at first. Rank later.
ClairelySarah@reddit
If you don’t want to do chicken breast with milk in a jar then just spill milk on as much fabric as possible without it being noticed. The smell will come out as soon as it gets warm in the car. My kid spilled chocolate milk in one of my old cars and the smell never came out. Used industrial chemicals and everything. My mother worked for a disaster company that cleaned up crime scenes and she gave me the stuff they would use. Still the smell never went away
kyriacos74@reddit
Go to Amazon and buy "Liquid Ass"
BiteMeMaybe@reddit
Dayum y'all are evil af
Airplade@reddit
Coyote urine from any big box sports store. And an insulin needle. Fill the syringe and give the seats/carpet/headrests a series of injections. Small ones.
Pour the remaining bottle into their air intake vents at the exterior base of their windshield. They'll never rid of the smell no matter how much they clean it.
mostoriginalname2@reddit
If you want them to get a new car you could empty a fire extinguisher up into their undercarriage.
desertvision@reddit
Barely puncture tuna can and leave it under the seat.
No_Educator_6376@reddit
Can of tuna fish with a pop top opener Pop can open but don’t take the top off just crack it open a little bit turn it over so it will drip out put it under the passenger side seat, slow acting nuclear bomb after a few days!
Ordinary-Conflict-89@reddit
What if you injected the car cushions with milk, or sardine juice, or something? Or what if you poured milk into the air vents? Or put sardines into the air vents? Feel free to use a different source of smell, but those two seem like heavyweights
buldra@reddit
Crack some eggs under the seat, I promise you it will smell horrible after some time
glm0002@reddit
Protein powder or a can of tuna
JakTheGripper@reddit
Oil-packed tuna!
Rachel_Silver@reddit
Stuff some raw shrimp into the crevice between the seat and the backrest.
Repulsive_State_7399@reddit
We once left tuna loosely wrapped in tinfoil in the car . Can confirm after a week it was impossible to drive without all the windows open. Do you need instant?
gogozrx@reddit
get a tube of shrimp paste from an asian market. but a little smear in a couple inconspicuous places. it won't *reek*, but they'll get a whiff of rotten fish on occasion. and it's really hard to find.
just a dot, not a lot.
nuclearmonte@reddit
Small bottle of fish sauce. Empty the bottle in the crease between the seats as you exit. Won’t smell too bad at first but whoa belly once it get gets ripe
Tiefschlag@reddit
Milk powder. Just add water. Perfect for a rainy day.
Otherwise, a dead Raccoon should do thw trick.
SeasonedSmoker@reddit
spill a milkshake.