Do I have valid reasons for wanting to leave the US, or should I stick it out here?

[-]

Forrest_Fire01@reddit

Nothing wrong with wanting to try something new. But, "I make decent money but this country seems to be a never ending race of make more money, status, wealth, etc." that is all on you. You are choosing to be part of the rat-race. If you wanted to, you there's no problem with living a simpler, calmer life here in the US.

[-]

abelabelabel@reddit

Gen Z is going to come around soon. I think America’s problems have piled up, and our country’s work culture can travel.

What I mean is. If you are going to have increased competition and suppressed wages for knowledge work - you might as well take a suppressed wage in a place that also has a humane standard of living. 40-60% of the homeless population works here in the US.

Healthcare is on the brink of collapse. Debt culture - and taking advantage of no credit scores abroad - it’s only a matter of time before young folks use debt to finance their exit.

It’s going to be an interesting decade. As someone who’s 42 and doing okay, I’m still on the brink. For me it’s section 2 of the Voting rights act. If that goes I go.

[-]

Gaming_Ryu@reddit

More like Gen Z would only come around when the Boomers are on their deathbed and Gen X stop being total screw-ups.

[-]

Large-Expression233@reddit

Since he earns a good living, I partly agree with you, but otherwise I have to say it also depends on whether he has the financial means. If not, he'll have real problems, especially in the disastrous US healthcare system, because other countries also have capitalism, but not the turbo-capitalism you have. If he's looking for another country where he doesn't just think about himself but is looking for a genuine community, then by all means. He should make the most of this life and enjoy it...❤️😃❤️

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

There’s nothing wrong with choosing to live outside the US either.

[-]

Forrest_Fire01@reddit

Yup, pretty much what I said. "Nothing wrong with wanting to try something new."

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

Sorry for any misunderstanding, I think my mind was still digesting previous responses, the judgey ones, and the ones that were more like attacks than responses. 😊

[-]

rosstafarien@reddit

Except for the enormous changes to individual safety and future opportunity occurring as the government changes from a Constitutional Republic into an autocratic kleptocracy.

[-]

Common_Stomach8115@reddit

This is easier said that done.

[-]

Daidrion@reddit

Easier than moving to another country and starting life from scratch there, imo.

[-]

Common_Stomach8115@reddit

All depends on what you can tolerate and ignore, and how much you want to compartmentalize your existence.

[-]

Skrivz@reddit

Yea but if you’re going to make an enormous change, might as well pick a better system. Or if you can swing being a remote worker, then try to be tied down to no system at all, or as little tied down to any particular system as possible

[-]

benskinic@reddit

I think housing, healthcare and basic human needs being tied to one of the fastest devaluing USD currency chapters of all time and worst job markets in 15 years is very different than "rat race"

[-]

Daidrion@reddit

That's not the first and not the last crisis that happened. The US is also not the only place experiencing the crisis. The US still is one of the best places to make money, and money give you freedom in the end.

OP mentions LATAM, and the life is easier there specifically because you come there with the US money. Natives living there participate in a much worse rat race.

[-]

Ornery-Worker4468@reddit

Que estado seria bueno bivir mujer sola de 56 años

[-]

Ornery-Worker4468@reddit

Quiero mudarme de puerto rico a virginia

[-]

shitshowatconception@reddit

I feel your frustration and understand your reasoning. I share some of them, too. I'm very, very against "passport bros" but it genuinely doesn't seem like that is your case, though I can say it won't FIX the problems at the very least it's a change of pace and out of your routine. I'm of the same mindset of wanting to leave but financially for me is not viable at this second. I'm currently looking at certifications and degrees that are on the rise in the countries of choice.

[-]

Professional-Web8682@reddit

Bro you got money right SO THEN LEAVE FFS. Why are you here unless you want to be miserable in America I swear. You want a better life than sure work remote and leave America this shithole. Your hard work nonsense won’t work in America unless you know the game and trust me you can’t say other wise cause you know it’s true and fuck whoever else denies it. You want a better social life, benefits, work life balance hell romantic partners or whatever then America is not it at all. It’s a shit hole for many people that’s all it ever was and will be your better off in another country and screw the overhype cunts in America, they have money that’s why they do it so they can take advantage of people here in America. Last warning to you real talk, value yourself and your happiness and your good trust.

[-]

Specialist-Baker9506@reddit

I empathised with you at first, really. There’s nothing wrong with wanting a calmer, more meaningful life. Many of us have grown tired of our own countries and sought a new life elsewhere.

But you lost me at the end. That “stretching your dollars in cheap places like Latin America"is your reflection shifted from seeking peace to seeking advantage. That mindset (to extract comfort and affordability from another society’s economic imbalance) is precisely how modern exploitation hides behind the language of lifestyle.

When foreigners move to cheaper countries with higher purchasing power, it often drives up rent, displaces locals, and THE WORST, it quietly communities into playgrounds for outsiders. What feels like a harmless personal choice can end up pricing out the very people who created the culture and warmth you were drawn to IN THE FIRST PLACE.

Beyond the economics, it is also a moral and cultural blindness. Wanting the “community values” of another country while benefiting from the inequalities that undermine those very values???? Lol... the contradiction. You cannot buy your way into authenticity or belonging, you EARN IT through respect, contribution, and genuine participation.

If you truly want a more community-oriented, balanced life, then become part of that community. Earn local, pay local, contribute local, become a local!!! And integrate with humility rather than the entitlement of earning foreign. Otherwise, you’re not escaping the rat race. You’re simply relocating it and exporting the same system that exhausted you in the first place.

Your reasons for wanting change are valid. But please don't fuck up other places and communities by escaping yours.

It's infuriating how places give away their authenticity for the comfort of those that were nobodies in their country, and now feel they can and now feel they can buy significance elsewhere!! turning living, breathing cultures into lifestyle props for their escapism..... smh.

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

You’ve made a lot of assumptions in your response. Stretching dollars doesn’t equal exploitation. People move from state to state, city to rural, neighborhood to neighborhood in the states hoping to stretch dollars, and not because they’re hoping to build a better financial portfolio. Offering advice to be part of the community is great. Looking for more peace and balance, a place with community values intuits that he wants to remove himself from a place lacking community values. Could he add balance to a community as an immigrant, while achieving his own balance and peace, maybe yes, maybe no, but nothing he said indicated he’d exploit anyone.

[-]

Alternative-Many3283@reddit

100% correct. Usually those who have a smugness about ppl who do things off the beaten path have A LOT to improve in their own lives. We are all ADULTS. We do what we do. No societal acceptance needed.

[-]

hibosch@reddit

I think you're being a bit harsh on OP here. I totally can see the kind of detestable ignorant, presumably "white male" expat you have in mind and are ranting against. They definitely exist.

But someone wanting to stretch their dollar in another country doesn't necessarily drive up the rent if they don't intend to overpay. He might be talking about cutting down his hours to a minimal amount and living on much less overall, which is what it sounds like to me for him wanting to live a more relaxed lifestyle. He also likely seeks community values because he wants to be...a community member.

The possible escapism is a valid criticism since he is using the term "solving his problems." But this is more in the interest of OP's well-being than the harm you foresee him bringing to another country.

Frankly, the over-application of settler-colonial language, without close-reading what one is reacting to, is a distinctly American thing.

[-]

CapableAnimator3263@reddit

The exploitation part sounds like a good fit for many of the immigrants that come to the United States.

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

Immigrants in the US exploits WHO???! They are the people that pay taxes, but will never benefit from their contributions; migrant workers that farmers can’t do without; the artists that bring music, dance, sculpture and visual arts to our country; immigrants that work as Nannies that parents entrust their children to; the doctors, nurses, and other professionals that study abroad, and here in the highest institutions of learning that contribute to our health, advancement, and welfare; the landscapers who create beauty in green; housekeepers that work in our hotels and homes, restaurant owners, servers, busboys, and hosts, that provide awesome food from other parts of the world; DACA - brought here as young children, and have spent years learning skills and professions that benefit our country - that’s supposed to lead to citizenship; the many who are underpaid, working longer hours, using skills that we don’t teach in school. They are the exploiters?!! Please don’t say healthcare, because despite the rhetoric, undocumented immigrants don’t qualify for healthcare or foodstamps that the taxes they pay help provide.

[-]

Duke_Newcombe@reddit

Can't necessarily disagree. The only thing I'd point out: nothing necessarily "wrong" with OP or anyone wanting to "stretch their dollars" by living somewhere with a more affordable economy: in many parts of the US, retiring or living with dignity is increasingly out of reach.

What is a problem is having an extractive, colonial mindset about it, where their benefit reigns supreme, above all other concerns (like their impact to the community they're going to). Yes, you covered that well (integrating, and providing a net benefit to the country, aside from your dollars/Yen/Euros), but a sweeping statements like:

When foreigners move to cheaper countries with higher purchasing power, it often drives up rent, displaces locals, and THE WORST, it quietly communities into playgrounds for outsiders. What feels like a harmless personal choice can end up pricing out the very people who created the culture and warmth you were drawn to IN THE FIRST PLACE.

It ignores that capitalism, with its oily tentacles reach everywhere, and will stab it's bloody money beak into any economy to extract wealth, and the capital holders in those country call the tune as far as prices--blaming immigrants is a secondary effect, and not really helpful.

[-]

CapableAnimator3263@reddit

Socialism also does a great job of extracting wealth.

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

Thank you for sharing your insight. Any political platform can act as a catalyst for exploitation of its people when an antisocial narcissist commandeers the military as his own, and incites the people with propaganda. None are exempt.

[-]

rudkap@reddit

Disagree. I lived in Manila for 5 years. An apartment that would cost $3k in a contemporary western city cost me $500. So yes, my money went further while living abroad. Get off your high horse.

[-]

Ok_Pink_123@reddit

👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

[-]

Quiet_Heron3003@reddit

Excellent response. As an American who just returned from living abroad for two years, this mindset of “my money goes further” is entitled and incredibly frowned upon around the world.

Also, wherever you go, there you are. Moving somewhere new won’t change unless you figure shit out within yourself.

[-]

Artistic_Career7554@reddit

This.

[-]

Manonemo@reddit

Shooooooot I have this same very same perception, but couldnt formulate it soooo well

[-]

Able-Exam6453@reddit

Bravo

[-]

RadishCultivator@reddit

👆👆👆

[-]

CatFrequent2782@reddit

I am in a simalar positon (late 30s male) work remotely and looking for a new country to call home. I have no family or friends, kids or really any legitimate reason to live here. Asia or Eastern Europe I'm thinking.

[-]

spicytomatilloo@reddit

Only you can determine whether or not your reasons are valid, but I will caution you that the rat race exists outside of the United States too. Along with other difficulties that you will not know or fully understand until you leave. I am not trying to discourage you, I believe that moving abroad is wonderful and enriching experience. However, you have to be realistic and the truth is, you may leave some issues behind, but then encounter new ones.

[-]

hibosch@reddit

If he goes to a much less expensive country he might suddenly realize he's rich there, at the top of the rat race, and decide there's nothing at the end of it all. :)

[-]

hibosch@reddit

it kind of depends on how attached you are to your friends and family, how far away the country is, and how easy it is for you to make new friends. This may have been suggested elsewhere but maybe try living in Mexico?

Wanting to escape the hypercapitalism of the US is a valid reason, especially if you find yourself economically squeezed and drained all the time. If you don't have enough money to start a family or do other things you want without sacrificing an unreasonable amount of time to work, then you certainly can find more balance elsewhere. The economic reason alone is *not* an internal psychological problem that you will just carry everywhere.

However, if you are feeling pressure from the race because you feel like you need to keep up with the Joneses, I would compassionately ask you to examine why the social pressure affects you so much.

Of course, a less work-oriented culture may answer your issues. You can also find that in the US if you want to make a change--for instance, communist groups ("communist" more in the social than the strict economic sense) and people who deliberately are trying to cultivate a more authentically human-oriented, and not transactional, way of relating to others.

There is no right or wrong answer. Why not try it for a while and see if you like it?

[-]

Several_Emotion_4717@reddit

There's tons of useful suggestions in comments here.

But once you shift, here's one suggestion that might help.

Develop a habit to keep track of your own finance and taxes. You'll thank yourself.

Either: 1. Do it manually (best in some way) 2. Do it with platforms or apps specific to a country (free ones are available such as mint, gnucash, irs2go) 3. In case you handle different currencies, then use a cross country platform(new ones are available such as settel .io)

[-]

Live_Exchange_6231@reddit

I hear that you want a more peaceful, balanced life, to live in a place where community values are still important. Does that mean you want to embrace the culture, learn and practice local customs, respect your neighbors, add your support to local initiatives, and celebrations? Balance is an interactive process. It is not a crime to lower personal expenses wherever you choose to live, but be mindful to use those dollars in ways that benefit your community; support local initiatives; purchase from local businesses; renting, leasing or purchasing housing considering local customs and your neighbors’ expectations. Whatever you decide, I hope you find the peace and balance you’re looking for.

[-]

Unusual_Sherbert_809@reddit

The best reason to move to another country is because that new country better aligns with your own values. If this is true, then you should go for it if you still can.

Plus you're young enough that you can always go back if you feel like it didn't work out.

We left the USA over 8 years ago. We still think it was the right decision for our family, and our lives are much better than they ever were back in the States.

[-]

Lil_Lingonberry_7129@reddit

Where did you move?

[-]

Unusual_Sherbert_809@reddit

USA -> Canada

[-]

Okay_Splenda_Monkey@reddit

I've spent a lot of time in Costa Rica. I have an uncle and cousins who live there, and when I was younger my dad and another uncle owned a farm there. I spent a lot of time there, and really loved both the place and the people.

One thing I want to bring up is that you might not have family near where you live in the U.S. -- neither do I. However, the fact they're still a domestic flight away means a lot.

Latin America is a big place, but parts of it are breathtakingly beautiful and pleasant to live in. I'd recommend traveling a bit and experiencing the rhythm of life in different countries before you pick a spot to settle. As a software engineer, you could certainly find work. Just don't expect to make as much money as you would in the USA unless you can hook up a remote job for a U.S. tech company before you leave or something. Even then, you could end up getting whacked by double taxation on what you earn.

Keep in mind what a big cultural change this will be. For me, my family being there made it much easier to manage.

[-]

MLSurfcasting@reddit

As an American, I lived in Germany, Turkey, Quatar, and Kuwait, before returning back to the U.S. The chaos and crime made me reluctant about returning. Currently residing on a remote New England island. I've been shopping for an additional property for retirement, for 2 years now. I stopped looking in the U.S. It's all over priced, and the market is going to see radical change, though I'm no expert.

That said, the only criteria I wanted was affordable, appreciating, warm climate (so I can garden), and similarly isolated. Currently shopping Tenerife. Hoping to be there (at least part time) by summer.

[-]

ComprehensiveTill535@reddit

Love tenerife

[-]

RandoFrequency@reddit

Excellent plan.

[-]

Catcher_Thelonious@reddit

Also check:

r/AmerExit
r/IWantOut
r/ExpatFIRE

[-]

potsbaddie@reddit

I want out is such a crappy reddit. They make it so hard to ask questions there

[-]

Inner_Ad_4725@reddit (OP)

Thank you. Yes I should have done a quick search first. It’s comforting to see I’m not alone in these thoughts & feelings.

[-]

David_R_Martin_II@reddit

Yes, you should have done a search first. And yes, you are not the only one who has these thoughts and feelings.

But... and this is a big BUT...

I don't think you have valid reasons. If you're trying to leave to escape something, you will go somewhere else and find, "That stuff followed me here." Because as others have pointed out, a big part of this is inside YOU.

[-]

The5Travelers@reddit

Sorry but you can't say that. You don't know everything he is thinking or feeling, he probably posted a small portion to get started. Each person is old enough to make their own decisions, if he wants to try it why not and then like others have said he can always come backm

[-]

No-Caregiver8049@reddit

Romano Tours would like to remind you: “If you’re sad where you are, and you go to another place, you’ll still be the same sad you, just somewhere else. Does that make sense?”

[-]

David_R_Martin_II@reddit

Yup. "If you can't enjoy the flight, you're not going to enjoy the beach."

Sylvia Plath wrote similar thoughts in The Bell Jar and we know how that turned out.

[-]

No-Caregiver8049@reddit

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TbwlC2B-BIg

[-]

CountryRoads2020@reddit

Thanks, good points in that skit.

[-]

David_R_Martin_II@reddit

Yup. OP will go there and think, "This country is also a never ending rat race of money, status, wealth, etc."

I worked in tech like OP. I even worked at a FAANG. I never worked more than 40 hours a week. I didn't have a problem with work-life balance. I never got caught up in the rat race. Because I made a choice. I didn't drive a car. I lived in an apartment. OP needs to figure out all this is up to him.

[-]

antiputer@reddit

Ten thousand percent valid as fuck. I am literally kicking myself for not doing this years ago

[-]

mountainruby@reddit

All these comments about not having a valid reason to move abroad and I wonder how many of these people have actually tried it. I disagree, I think you have very valid reasons. All you have to do is scroll through news headlines to understand how the US is in rapid decline in so many aspects. Thirty is the best time to act on those reasons. You're absolutely valid in your conclusion that life in America is a rat race. Moving abroad will indeed give you a different set of problems, but comparatively, they are minor. Having done it myself, I can tell you that for me in moving to Italy, I'm not as stressed, even when doom scrolling the current events and fuckery in the US, I no longer worry about getting shot up in a grocery store, getting assaulted as a woman, or trying to juggle finances In an economic climate that's only getting worse. In much of Europe and probably Latin America, cost of living is about 50% cheaper than almost everywhere in the US. My healthcare is excellent and about a third of the cost of what I was paying in the US. I don't actually need a car because the public transportation here is remarkable and so cheap. The food isn't poisoned with all the crap that US foods have. The culture is conducive to living well and being happy. I can't speak for Latin America because I've not lived there, but with this regime waging war on both Colombia and Venezuela, I think I'd be careful about moving to those countries at this time. So yes, follow your gut feelings for now because you can always change and move back but most importantly, give yourself time to adjust in your new country wherever you choose.

[-]

Business_Bunnie@reddit

Just wanting to is a valid reason. Just be smart and do your research.

[-]

darksky016@reddit

For me, trying something new is a valid reason

[-]

manzanita_cheeks20@reddit

Why not try finding a new crowd, a new job, or a new hobby that don’t feel so rat race-y

[-]

Beginning-Avocado590@reddit

If you have the means you’ll likely regret not making a jump while countries still accept us. The mass exodus far exceeds the norms and with good reason. You are not a tree and not bound to “tough it out” as others suggest. The fact that you aren’t bound to family here makes this point even more. There is nothing to prevent you from returning later. Take a 3 year hiatus doing easy work that you enjoy. You know the answer and I’ll leave it at that. You are braver than you realize and life isn’t so binary. Make it an adventure. You’ll do great!

[-]

OddDirector6407@reddit

Yes. Don’t let anyone gaslight you and convince you not.

[-]

shydinoRawr@reddit

Why not try it out, what do you really have to lose? Every time I made big life changes I've always found that I overweighted the risks and underweighted (or didn't even have a clue) about the upsides

[-]

retrosenescent@reddit

Those are valid reasons for wanting to leave, yes. Most other countries are not rat races the way the US is.

[-]

Duke_Newcombe@reddit

Thinking through your reasons is always acceptable, because, at the end of the day, "there" is no better than "here" if you're running from something.

However, since you're paying the bills, your reasons are your own, and you don't need permission or validation for them. Just make sure that you're not conflating "not being in the US" with "not having problems/having all problems solved, now".

[-]

SsymoneS@reddit

Just my take as someone who has been Nomadic for about a year (spent some time in Africa and Europe) and planned a move in less than 3 months: if you're unhappy (which it seems you are) just go. I promise you'll figure out everything else that needs to be figured out.

Yes, you can't escape yourself, but so often we don't realize how our environments cue our habits. And that how we think and feel are also sometimes just big habits we don't realize until we're in new environments. If you don't feel safe or fulfilled or happy where you are, that makes a difference.

"Traveling" for over a year made me realize I'm not the same person I am in one place as I am in another. At the core sure, but there are some places that absolutely light me up or make me feel so at ease. If I had citizenship elsewhere, I think I would have made this decision way sooner.

Just my take, but I think go for it. You can always go back. I have no citizenship abroad, no residency, no savings because I invested in new professional training recently. Just a remote job and a rough plan and I'm taking my dog and leaving everything and everyone I've ever known in January. If I love it great, if not, I keep moving forward.

I used to spend a lot of time in my head trying to figure out the "right" choice instead of in the real world just making decisions and pivoting when necessary. If you're thinking about moving now. Move now. You'll never not be able to pivot

[-]

daluzy@reddit

I live in Colombia. I'm retired and have a couple of pensions and my Colombian wife and I have some passive income from local rental stuff.

We own everything and have no debt, and we live pretty comfortable on $1,500 USD, with is about 5,800,000 Colombian Pesos. Remember, no debt, we own our house/car. To give you an idea on bills:

Medical insurance: $150,000 pesos Admin lot: $150,000 pesos Movistar Internet: $90,000 pesos Phone: $29,000 pesos 20th Electric: $400,000 pesos 20th Gas: $50,000 pesos 20th Water: $50,000 pesos

Rounded up is $1,000,000 pesos.

Then add in food, drink, gasoline for the car, travel and misc home stuff and we get up to $5,800,000.

Locals doing the minimum wage bring in $1,500,000 to $2,000,000 COP per month, so it can get tight for them. Locals will not have a $400,000 electric bill as many have no AC, and locals will not be paying $150,000 for medical insurance as they will qualify for gov medical is is horrible, but it is there.

We live in a typical middle class neighborhood, not a gated expat or rich persons community and we basically spend 6-12 months here, then travel back to the states for several months and wander in our RV.

I did not "leave" the US, I just retired and went diving and met a girl who happened to be Colombian and we hit it off.

Expat issues:

Banking, need to maintain a US address and phone number as I have zero trust in the Colombian banking system. So we use a friends place for an address and use Google Fi to keep a US phone number for 2FA stuff.

Voting is easy, we just plan to be in the US for voting.

US mail is not really an issue, if anything important comes in, my buddy forwards it to us as needed...pretty expensive.

Taxes are easy, we declare and pay in both the US and Colombia. We do not make enough to worry about taxes really, but we file as required.

Relaxed living abroad. Well, this is subjective. For example, we owned a dive shop in the Islands for several years. To the tourist, we were living in paradise! But we still had to battle local traffic, pay local bills, deal with unfamiliar laws and taxation. You just might find yourself trading a work place rat race for a different style rat race.

Where we live, I am the only gringo that we know of (been here going on 19 years) and Spanish is a must for day to day living activity. Tourist stuff, no drama, but billing, taxes, licenses need a decent level of Spanish.

The other thing to consider is you will need a visa to work most anywhere, even remotely if you are going to be honest. Most countries do not need foreigners moving in an d competing for limited local jobs.

If you have issues, moving is not going to fix them as your monkeys are your monkeys no matter where you go.

If you think you can afford it, travel and try stuff out, never has to be forever and one can always start over again if you want to.

For the folks who think there is a political paradise in the next country, keep in mind all politicos have their interests at heart, not yours and changing countries is not going to change it.

Good luck, be well.

[-]

blonde_nomad11@reddit

You just described our retirement plans with my husband.

[-]

al_tanwir@reddit

I left Canada almost 5 years ago, and relocated to Southeast Asia.

You can build a social network abroad, in places like Chiang Mai or Bali, you'd be surprised there are expats from all walks of life living in Asia.

Sure you'll miss family, you can also visit them every now and then.

I don't fully agree with 'leaving won't fix your problems', most of the time problems come from from your environment. Toxic family, friends, Workplace etc. (I'm talking from personal experience)

At the end of the day, it's not for everyone, you'll either hate it or love it.

But it's a great experience to live in one's life. :)

[-]

ladychanel01@reddit

The first step is to research visa requirements & find out which countries are options for you.

[-]

ConcentratePretend93@reddit

Im not happy in the US. Life is simply better living somewhere where the government isnt actively creating a war against its own people. Transportation, Food, Culture can be radically improved by a flight.

[-]

TraditionalRemove716@reddit

Whichever you choose to do, pick up the book called Sapiens. It's an eye-opener about sociological trends and nearly predicts what has befallen the US. Almost Orwellian.

That said, as an American expat living in Japan, my observation is the the US is far from alone in Capitalism. Greed and lust for power seems to be consuming many nations these days. Check out elections across the globe and you will find one after another where the far right is winning.

I hesitate to say end times are near because many before us have said the same thing. Still, something's gotta give somewhere.

[-]

lieutenantbunbun@reddit

Leaving the usa influence my health for the better. No regrets

[-]

Manonemo@reddit

Close fly away, might be pretty far in usa as airtraffic controllers are historically whacked like pinata.
American society set up (rat race, manageriall BuShi t, privatizing healthcare ala USA, ruining education, indoctrination of population - is happening all over the world).

So my question is, is it worthy to pack and move for more liveable life for 5 to 7 years? Trying to figure out city, country, looking for friends,.. Idk, Im looking for same answer myself

[-]

Local-Amphibian-4732@reddit

Unless you’re a white make, then you have good reason to leave the US.

[-]

Local-Amphibian-4732@reddit

White male

[-]

Crafty_Try_423@reddit

Leaving won’t fix your problems. That said, still do it if you want to. But I’m working in a software engineer adjacent role for a major consulting firm and while people around me are clearly in a rat race, I don’t feel particularly pressured by it. I’m 40F, single, not dating or looking to date, have a small but solid group of friends, and a couple of hobbies I love. I make enough money to pay for my home (which is saying a lot, as I bought it last year), and while I don’t quite have retirement squared away, I do have financial goals I’m working towards.

Most people around me have more money, more homes, and travel more than I do. I don’t really care. I know it’s because they got lucky and I didn’t. This economy sucks and I’ve hit every different economic period. There are only two decisions I regret, that would have led to a better life now: not marrying my ex-husband, and buying a house 5-15 yrs ago.

My point is you need to ask yourself why you feel like you’re in a rat race. Why are you competing to constantly have more? Is that coming from inside you? Cause that won’t change if you move.

If you live somewhere like SF or NY, you could try a smaller, maybe temporary move to a smaller, less rat-racy city first. It would be a cheaper and simpler way to start figuring out what you really want, etc.

[-]

Dragon_Flow@reddit

"Stick it out" sounds kind of stoic. If you're suffering, you don't have to "stick it out."

You probably are at the point of making lists, reasons to stay and reasons to leave, so do that.

I think almost all the answers here are judgmental and surprising to see in an expat group, except the first one. Won't hurt to try. I'd ignore all the answers that are trying to discourage you. I'm not seeing very strong red flags in your post.

Seems like there are a lot of people here that are having their own personal issues.

[-]

Desperate_Word9862@reddit

Who can be sick of a country led by ghouls where AI videos of “the king” dropping feces on the country’s citizens is normalized? If you can get out, of course it would make your life more peaceful. There will be new stresses but not the ones facing the US. Good luck!

[-]

SWJenks@reddit

I left the U.S. at 38 for basically the same reasons; I was burned out in my corporate career (UX Designer) and don’t like where the country was headed (even more so now). Single, no kids, and nothing to lose other than not seeing friends/family as much. Sold my house, car, everything I had, put my life in 2 bags to travel the world and find myself again…

Well, it’s been over 3 years now, I have seen many amazing countries, and I’ve been living happily in Spain for the past 2 years now. I do miss my friends/family, sure, but they’re all busy with families of their own and still in the “rat race.” I’ve made new friends here that I connect with much at this point in my life, and while I make a fraction of what I used to (working remote, part time as a UX contractor), I’ve gained my life and sanity back. I heard a quote a long time ago that has resonated with me as I’ve gotten older, “I can always make more money, but I can never make more time.”

It’s not for everyone. Hell, it’s probably not for 95% of people, but there’s some of us that just don’t feel like we belong in the place we were born and know deep down there may be a different way of life somewhere else. Leaving was the best thing I could’ve done for myself and while I don’t know if Spain is my forever spot (or if I even have a “forever spot”) I know now I’ll never fully live in the U.S. again.

[-]

ritaq@reddit

Where did you move in Spain if you mind the question? I assume you had to register as autónomo and you have a US salary? I am asking because median salary in Spain is just 22K

[-]

SWJenks@reddit

I am autónomo, yes. I live in the south in Andalucía.

[-]

Gunzhard22@reddit

If you can out, I'd do it.

[-]

The-Purple-Church@reddit

You can continue making decent money without joining the race.

[-]

CocoLuca333@reddit

Where ever you land, consider that you’ll find a significant other there. I lived out of the country for 13 years and luckily it is a just over 1.5 hour flight back where I am right now. I love having two countries to go to. But can cause issues if you have kids with a national and you end up not getting a long or you want to go back to the USA.

[-]

FluffyBonehead@reddit

I’m in Canada. It is definitely safer and more chill, especially if you move to smaller cities like Calgary or Ottawa. Being a software engineer, I believe you have great chances of getting a PR. However, Canada cost of living is very high and families are struggling with housing. I still prefer Canada compared to the USA. If I were in your shoes, I’d try to immigrate to a Nordic country like Norway or Finland. Although cost of living is high, I believe they have more life work balance, but I’m biased because I love the North. Anyways, if you need more info about Canada, I can help with that.

[-]

No-Caregiver8049@reddit

What country? Are you eligible to move to a Latin American country? Have you investigated any? No one here knows what your “community oriented values” are or which country may match them. It’s not a quiz show.

[-]

crani0@reddit

Being far from family and friends is something that affects all of us. I know people who have been away from their home country for decades and still have to deal with that feeling, even if they don't want to move back.

So it either brings you back at some point or you will just be managing it forever.

[-]

New-Composer7591@reddit

The financial burden is significant. Your income can be double taxed. Taxed once by the country you moved to plus taxed again by the US if you’re working remotely for a us company. At least the locations I’ve looked into had this tax dilemma.

I think your concern of homesickness is valid. If you’re already concerned about it, it’s likely to be a major issue moving to a country where the language isn’t your primary, making new friends will take longer because of language barriers. Also, you’ll be an American in a Latin America country. Depending on which country you choose, Americans might not be as welcome as we like to think. We don’t have the best reputation these days.

[-]

Pecncorn1@reddit

Some things to think about, wherever you go you will be there, the first year anywhere is, or has been for me, damn hard. Depending on where you go in Latin America you will always need to be on guard especially if you're not fluent. I've traveled most of it, Central and South and lived 13 years in two countries there. If you can take an extended trip to wherever you are thinking of moving to it would give you a better sense of the reality of what you are considering. Best of luck in whatever you decide to do.

[-]

Mindless_Handle4479@reddit

Go for it, mate, it's now or never!

[-]

ExcellentWinner7542@reddit

Follow your heart and take the leap.

[-]

Travel_Dreams@reddit

Be aware, every society and culture has its own compromises. So you will be moving into a culture that you may not understand.

Money does cure many compromises in a variety of cultures. If you can take the US wages to a new location then you will be able to support a smooth transition.

Eventually you will succumb to the local lifestyle and compromises.

I'm not trying to support the US rat race. I am trying to warn you that every country and culture will be a challenge. Choose wisely.

Try to take the best of both worlds to create a better lifestyle for yourself. It's hard work but can be fulfilling when it works, and a disaster when it doesn't. Be prepared with a healthy savings account, controlled spending, and healthy connections with job sources.

[-]

FrauAmarylis@reddit

Are you ready for Inefficiency and high taxes? That’s the reality.

[-]

Tabitheriel@reddit

I left the US in my 30s. It was equal parts rough and fun. Learning a new language and culture was interesting, but challenging. If you can do remote or freelance work, you can get a visa for that, live in a smallish town in the EU and enjoy a better standard of living.

[-]

sullgk0a@reddit

I left when I was a bit younger than you are, for mostly political reasons. What I decided to do is to find a country that didn't charge me much, if any, income tax and to go to where the money was. That way, if either I or the political climate changed, well, I could move back or retire or whatever.

23+ years later, I retired.

I had amassed a fair deal of money along the way. I was, when I left, a software engineer with a few other competencies. I ended up, in one way or another, using all of those competencies. I worked really hard. I met my wife abroad. We had kids and became really happy.

Then, the time came to leave.

Things had changed in the USA. It wasn't much better if any, really, but it was different and I had changed a lot. Somehow, being closer to family became an issue.

That's what worked for me. Earning more money allows you to hedge your bets. LEGALLY avoiding US taxes wherever you can (there's a thing called the 911 exclusion that allows you to earn money up to a certain limit tax free in the USA, plus by the time that you hit that limit, you might find that your company will tax-match you in order to retain you) allows you to hedge your bets.

[-]

gachigachi_@reddit

Wanting to leave is a valid reason in and of itself.

[-]

natural-situation420@reddit

If you can do it, do it.

[-]

Short-Garlic8934@reddit

as an American who moved to Asia I have yet to meet a single person (out of the hundreds I've met while traveling) who regretted it

[-]

qmillerinsurance@reddit

I echo this

[-]

Short-Garlic8934@reddit

Thank you brother! more people should know.

[-]

qmillerinsurance@reddit

Do what makes you happy, if that's a move abroad go for it. Find a community wherever you go and you'll find happiness.

[-]

godless-wife@reddit

Every reason is a valid reason, if it matters enough. That's nothing someone can decide for you, least of all someone online who has never met you.

[-]

cosmicchitony@reddit

Your reasons for wanting to leave are completely valid, as prioritizing life quality and balance over relentless career pursuit is a legitimate goal. Since you have the remote work option and language skills, a trial period abroad could be the perfect way to test the waters without making a permanent decision.

[-]

HerroWarudo@reddit

Whether its good or bad 30 is the right age to move, just for experience and spice of life. Wont be as easy starting a new career in another country by 40 or 50 so its now or likely never.

[-]

RandoFrequency@reddit

Do it. Bring some fam with you if you can? Aging parent is the reason I moved back. Can’t wait to GTFO again, cos once you know, you know. There are people here I love and will miss, but the stress will put me 6FU if I keep this up, and then I’m no good to anyone.

So I’m leaving again, but this time bringing mom with me. If anything, she at least gets to enjoy a more relaxing last few years and I can more actively enjoy those years with her in (relatively more) peace.

Who knows, I might be needing to offer up my sofa to refugees at some point, oof!

[-]

Rofi0510@reddit

Reddit I want to hear from seniors who moved abroad and did not regret it.

[-]

Present_Price_1067@reddit

I don’t have any advice but I am moving to Europe myself next year.

[-]

Prahasaurus@reddit

A couple of things:

You don't need to leave the US to leave the rat face. You have chosen to live that way within the US. You can stay within the US and leave the rat race. Move to a small town where they value community. Get involved within the community. You are a software engineer, there are many remote jobs in that field. Homes in rural areas are often quite cheap. You don't need a large place, anyway, you are single. Maybe a 2 bedroom or max 3 bedroom smaller home.
Often people who leave their country are fleeing from something else, not necessarily the USA per se. Maybe they are unhappy or lonely, and feel they need a radical change. Maybe. You may want to consider a remote job and then working just 1-2 years abroad to test it out.

Good luck.

[-]

alucardian_official@reddit

Peace corps?