Do you know how to use the word “whom” properly and do you ever actually use it?
Posted by hakohead@reddit | AskAnAmerican | View on Reddit | 496 comments
Repulsive_Brief6589@reddit
Yes I know how to use it but I mostly just use it when writing.
sispbdfu@reddit
Yes and yes, occasionally.
I also frequently use em dashes and whilst. I paid attention in English class years ago, read a lot as a kid and once owned a shirt that said “I am silently correcting your grammar.”
Sorry.
Intelligent_Part101@reddit
I don't know in which century "whilst" ceased to be used in the USA... but it was certainly a long time ago.
darklyshining@reddit
I judge movie dialog by its use. Even to the point of believing a scene ruined, when whom is used correctly by a character that wouldn’t.
lord_hufflepuff@reddit
Yes and no
amigammon@reddit
Yes.
MamaMidgePidge@reddit
Yes, I know how to properly use it, although I don't always do so. Depends upon my audience. Sometimes it would just feel pretentious.
skucera@reddit
If you know when to use “he” versus “him,” you already know the rules for “who” versus “whom.”
mustbethedragon@reddit
This is how I learned it and how I teach it.
brunetteblonde46@reddit
Can you teach it? 😬
InevitableRhubarb232@reddit
If you would answer the question with “him” use whom. If you would answer it with “he” use who.
Whom should I send? Send him.
Who did it? He did.
brunetteblonde46@reddit
Thank you so much!!! Effect and affect? That one stumps me too.
cheddarsox@reddit
Its alphabetical. You affect something before it has an effect. The verb causes the noun.
ilovemyhiddenself@reddit
"A" comes before "E" in the alphabet, therefore "Affect" refers to the CAUSE and "Effect" refers to the RESULT.
I need to recall this every time I use either word.
queerhedgehog@reddit
Affect is an Action (verb), both start with a: “This will affect my future.”
Effect is the End Result (noun): “This will have a positive effect on my future.”
Curmudgy@reddit
With very uncommon exceptions. One can effect a change.
byebybuy@reddit
One can also have an affect.
PAXICHEN@reddit
Those are some of those awesome boundary conditions in English. I love them.
g_halfront@reddit
English loves to noun verbs and verb nouns. I used to get irate business twerps talking about “solutioning” or discussing “the ask”.
The more I thought about it, the more I realized this is just what English does and being annoyed by it is futile. There are dozens of examples of this abomination, and if I’m honest, I use plenty of them. I just don’t think about them because they aren’t new additions.
savro@reddit
Oh my God, I hate this BS, trying-to-sound smart business speak so much. Especially when people pronounce the word “processes” as “processeez”. I understand that it’s an accepted pronunciation now, and that languages change over time, but it just sounds wrong and grating to my ears.
Tempus_Fugit68@reddit
“Shopping” came from the act of going to shops to buy things. Been going on forever
213737isPrime@reddit
It's not English doing that, it's twerps trying to be cool with their jargon.
Mikeseddit@reddit
Shouldn’t that be, “English loves to verbify nouns“?
Tacoshortage@reddit
One's affect can have an effect on the way others view them.
Tempus_Fugit68@reddit
Unless you’re talking about someone’s displayed emotional state e.g. “He smiled throughout the funeral. His affect was inappropriate for the situation”
mcxfour@reddit
Who affects whom?
brunetteblonde46@reddit
TY!
QuinoaPoops@reddit
Think “vane” like weather vane. V: Verb A: Affect N: Noun E: Effect
InevitableRhubarb232@reddit
I think of “cause and effect.” Because “cause and affect” sounds weird. Works for me.
mustbethedragon@reddit
Sure! If you would use "he" in a sentence, then you'd use "who." If you'd use "him," then you need "whom."
Examples: He wants to go. Who wants to go?
Give it to him. Give it to whom? OR more grammatically, To whom do I give it?
Here's a quick video with the same trick: https://youtu.be/u5M4JncEY5U?si=6qwGD2Qb19WMl5W6.
happy_traveller2700@reddit
Tks!
blazingsun@reddit
I usually think of the answer to the question to figure it out. “Who is going to delver this?” only makes sense with “he’s going to” instead of “him’s going to.” Contrastingly, “Whom does this belong to?” can only be answered “it’s for him” instead of “it’s for he.” You have to match the “m” at the end of the word
Hot_Ad5959@reddit
Not to be nitpicky, but ‘to whom does this belong’?
kirklennon@reddit
“Whom does this belong to?” is grammatically perfect. Nitpick over the fact that they changed the answer to “It’s for him” rather than correctly matching the construction of the question (which is how this tip works in the first place) and saying “it belongs to him.”
uncle-brucie@reddit
Him and she is hungry
Mobile-Ad3151@reddit
Her and him are hungry. /s. One of my pet peeves. See it way too often.
CaptainPunisher@reddit
Me and my wife hate this, too. Well, me do. Her doesn't.
judijo621@reddit
Seriously, Smalls... You are killing me!
CaptainPunisher@reddit
It hurt to write.
TheWholeMoon@reddit
I needed this laugh.
CaptainPunisher@reddit
Happy to provide it for you. I hope you have a great day!
WellWellWellthennow@reddit
Eeek
No_Weakness9363@reddit
So “Who is going to drive us home?” And “That burger is for whom?” Are both correct?
skucera@reddit
Yes! Wasn’t that easy?
No_Weakness9363@reddit
Nope. That and semicolons, I’ll never master them, yet I’m fluent in everything else English.
Squidgie1@reddit
Yes - both "him" and "whom" end in M, so that's an easy way to remember it.
Idustriousraccoon@reddit
I’m more upset lately by people clearly confused by when to use I and when to use Me…and this is not just Americans…I’ve seen it all over programs from the BBC…it’s like an epidemic of people trying to sound fancy with predictable results. Stop this nonsense. I’m more likely to forgive the misplaced who…but when we literally can’t even use the personal pronouns correctly what are we even doing people… I’m only sort of kidding.
geneb0323@reddit
Huh... Now I actually know how to use "whom." But I'm still not going to use the word as it has always sounded really pretentious to my ear.
skucera@reddit
I agree. I mostly reword my sentences to make “who” the correct word to use, so knowing the rule has helped me.
meowmix778@reddit
Ya know, I've never heard that little trick. That's a good one.
skucera@reddit
It’s how I learned it! “Whom” was an enigma to me prior to that, along the lines of “old-timey” words like “ye” and “thee.”
Distinct-Thought-419@reddit
Can you give an example?
Intelligent_Host_582@reddit
I always look at it by thinking about the answer to a question. So if you said, "Who can do that?" the answer is "HE can do that," so you know that "who" was correct in that instance.
Similarly, if the sentence was "John, whom I have known for years, is very friendly." You know HIM, so "whom" is correct in that sentence. It's all about the "m."
Conversely, if you said "To who is the award going?" It's going to him. There, you see that "who" and "him" don't match up, so it was the incorrect usage.
TrashPandaNotACat@reddit
That's a great way to figure out which to use, when in doubt.
Charlesinrichmond@reddit
yes x2
WarrenMulaney@reddit
Yes and yes
shockhead@reddit
I would always say, "Without whom we are going to completely blow this presentation" but I would also always say, "Who the hell is she talking about?" Mixed bag.
silviazbitch@reddit
You’ve used both correctly, but I imagine you already know that.
GrandmaBaba@reddit
Actually it should be "Whom the hell is she talking about?" The subject of that question is she. Whom is still the object of the preposition (about whom). IIRC
Mean-Math7184@reddit
No, "Who is..." is correct, because it is in the nominative case. "Whom" is used for dative/accusative/ablative cases. It's very simple parse the sentence and see that "whom" is the wrong case.
OverSearch@reddit
Even worse, the correct grammar for this would be "About whom the hell is she talking?" Can't end the sentence with a preposition, after all. But the reality is that pretty much nobody would actually say this.
nothingbuthobbies@reddit
That "rule" was completely made up in order to impose Latin grammar on English, and pretty much no one who knows anything about linguistics considers it legitimate. Same for split infinitives. Whereas "whom" is a totally bona fide English word that has real utility and follows patterns that arose organically during English's development.
LeGrandePoobah@reddit
You may call it imposed, but you would never see a media story written with “about” at the end of a sentence, unless quoting it. The ending a sentence with a preposition is still a pretty hard fast rule in writing, even though it isn’t in speaking.
Cyber_Punk_87@reddit
It’s really not. (I’ve been a professional writer and editor, including a copyeditor, for almost 20 years.)
Burnt_and_Blistered@reddit
None of the publishers for which I’ve worked over the last four decades would ever tolerate a preposition at the end of a sentence.
Cyber_Punk_87@reddit
Interesting. Every publisher I’ve worked with has used the CMOS and it hasn’t followed that rule since 1906…
Connect_Mail@reddit
I am a published technical writer and I have had many articles pass editorial review with sentences that end in a preposition
Connect_Mail@reddit
I am a published technical writer and I have had many articles pass editorial review with sentences that end in a preposition
Greenbean6167@reddit
I think it’s less about a preposition in general and more about unnecessary prepositions. For example, “Where is he at?” has an unnecessary preposition, whereas “What’s he talking about?” is perfectly acceptable.
haileyskydiamonds@reddit
Made up or not, it’s still the rule. 🤷🏻♀️
Tempus_Fugit68@reddit
“That is exactly the kind of pedantic nonsense up with which I will not put!”
silviazbitch@reddit
It’s an irregularly constructed sentence. I think the antecedent of the preposition is the understood subject of the sentence- Who the hell is [the person that] she is talking about?
FoggyGoodwin@reddit
But we almost always say "who" instead ...
Pristine_Society_583@reddit
Yep.
Mikeseddit@reddit
Did they? I thought it should be, “Whom the hell is she talking TO?”
BeckieSueDalton@reddit
"To whom the hell is she talking‽*
ScatterTheReeds@reddit
Except that you split the infinitive 😉
ljculver64@reddit
Same
cocococlash@reddit
Yes and no
Entire-Pirate-3308@reddit
Same
Mean-Math7184@reddit
Yes. It is a normal part of conversational vocabulary.
timdtechy612@reddit
After reading this post, I can no longer speak or write correctly. 😂
Hegemonic_Smegma@reddit
Yes, I do, and yes, I do.
JasminJaded@reddit
Yes, and yes.
wiikid6@reddit
“Hello children! Whom do you love?” - Sideshow Bob
whip_lash_2@reddit
Yes. Whom doesn't?
Bluematic8pt2@reddit
I've been an English dork since grade school but I can never remember how to use it. It can sound pretentious, like not ending a sentence with a preposition (sometimes)
StayAtHomeChipmunk@reddit
Yes and yes
Important_Hurry_950@reddit
Yes, I use it because I don’t like to end my sentences in a preposition. So, I’ll say “with whom you are acquainted”.
IHaveBoxerDogs@reddit
Yes, and yes. Those bumper stickers that read "Who rescued who?" should read "Who rescued whom."
JesusStarbox@reddit
So ac/DC has been wrong all this time?
IHaveBoxerDogs@reddit
Don't get me started on songs. There are so many that should use "me" instead of "I."
Ameisen@reddit
Or use incorrect verb tenses.
SuperNebula7000@reddit
You totally ruined it for me. I'll never be able to see that sticker the same way again.
Steerider@reddit
Who (subject) rescued whom (object).
Much like the distinction between "I" and "me".
violetmangomoon@reddit
I haven’t seen these stickers but yes you’re right
Burnt_and_Blistered@reddit
Yes and yes. I also use em dashes and semicolons.
Trappist1@reddit
Whom gives a fuck.
indifferentunicorn@reddit
To whom it may concern:
I actually only always use the word who
Stay_Beautiful_@reddit
Yes and yes
HeyPurityItsMeAgain@reddit
Yes and not really. It looks pretentious.
dan2376@reddit
I find it very surprising how many people in this thread are saying they use it. I know basically no one who actually uses whom in everyday speech
DeByGodCapn@reddit
I've had sort of an opposite experience, I've heard most people outside this thread claim they don't use whom or that it's archaic/extinct, but when I started actually listening for it I hear it all the time in everyday speech here. Not in formal contexts or from particularly educated people either.
BulkyHand4101@reddit
Same - I know how to use it, but I can’t imagine any situation where I’d want to.
Maybe if I was giving a formal speech? Or in court?
Burial4TetThomYorke@reddit
Yes and yes
vbf-cc@reddit
I believe so, and yes.
MagicalFishing@reddit
yes, I'll use it if I'm in a formal setting but not usually in casual conversation
Tempus_Fugit68@reddit
Yes and rarely
FustianRiddle@reddit
Yes and only when being formal, otherwise "who" works just fine in most cases.
"Who are you waiting for?" is a perfectly cromulent sentence. So is "For whom are you waiting?" But I think the former is cromulenter than the latter in everyday speech.
Matilda-17@reddit
Yes to both.
SkullFoot@reddit
Never
BrainwaveWizard@reddit
For Whom the Bell Tolls. It rings for him.
voidcritter@reddit
I know how to use "whom" correctly, but I never use it because doing so would come off as super pretentious.
tangouniform2020@reddit
Swap it for him and see how it sounds
VentusHermetis@reddit
i know it's used as the object, and i think i usually remember to use it that way, except in cases where it's the subject of a clause, in which case I'm not sure and usually don't use it.
WolverineEcstatic918@reddit
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
To.
To who?
To whom!
Ok-Ambassador8271@reddit
No & yes
comeholdme@reddit
Yes, I use it consistently. Some people claim that nobody does and that it would sound weird, but I don’t believe that my speech gets flagged as ”weird.” They just don’t pick up on it.
Connect_Mail@reddit
I do know how to use it properly and I also use in my everyday conversation. I also use “shall”
Sad_Highlight_9059@reddit
Yes and yes. It is meant to be "whom" when it is replacing an object in a sentence and "who" when it is replacing the subject.
Ex:
Who is going to the concert? (The subject is the person going to the concert.)
You are going to the concert with whom? (In this case it is whom as it is the object of the preposition "with").
You can test this by replacing "who" with a simple pronoun like "he/she". In the first sentence, the sentence remains grammatically correct with the substitution. "He is going to the concert."
In the second, it would not be grammatically correct to use he/she, so you must use whom. "You are going to the concert with she?" (<---See, incorrect.)
Blutrumpeter@reddit
Yes because I had to learn how to write properly for work and reluctantly for the second part but I try not to because it makes it feel like I smell my own farts
PhasmaUrbomach@reddit
If you can replace the word with him, it's whom. If you can replace the word with he, it's who.
jmstrats@reddit
To whom are you speaking? Me?
Haruspex12@reddit
Yes and yes.
JorgeMcKay@reddit
No and yes
Oenonaut@reddit
And that covers it! Thanks everyone, upvote your favorites.
dontforgettowriteme@reddit
You're my favorite for this comment. lol
Oenonaut@reddit
Yeah when I posted the only four comments were the four possible combinations of yes and no lol
dontforgettowriteme@reddit
I figured - I often have the same thought. Lol
eKs0rcist@reddit
We’re missing “no and no”?
pwgenyee6z@reddit
There are so many of you! This is how languages evolve.
taranathesmurf@reddit
Frankly, I think most people look at someone using the word whom and think what a pretentious twit.
hakohead@reddit (OP)
I definitely don't think someone using it themselves is being pretentious if they are using it correctly. It is only pretentious if they use it wrong imo. Also, pretentious when someone goes out of their way to tell someone that they should have used "whom" instead of "who", but just using the word itself doesn't bother me
Otherwise-OhWell@reddit
Replace "he" with "who" or "him" with "whom" is how I was taught. If the sentence still makes sense, you're good!
Harder to do when speaking off the cuff sometimes.
Rob_LeMatic@reddit
Now do whomst!
Otherwise-OhWell@reddit
"Who among us hasn't" = "whomst"
Rock-Wall-999@reddit
To whom is this of any real significance?
bobshallprevail@reddit
He vs him.
Yes I use it as needed.
OllieHondro@reddit
If I hear somebody say the word “whom” I instantly assume they’re a total ass.
astrologicaldreams@reddit
pretty sure and yes
Novel_Assistant4518@reddit
The word whom only exists for pretentious people to “correct” others
hudgepudge@reddit
I think I do, and whom.
russian_hacker_1917@reddit
yes but i usually replace it with whomst cuz its silly, just like people who try to hold on to this archaic form.
marshmallowserial@reddit
Do I know how to use it yes, but I have never seen it in a day to day chat or email. When we are firing off hundreds of messages a day proper English is not important. It's more important to convert PSI to barg and sat WTF is responsible for a 40 PSI loss
Suppafly@reddit
I mostly use vibes to know when to use it correctly, and yes I do use it.
Rbkelley1@reddit
I do but I usually say whomst for comedic effect.
Busy_Library4937@reddit
Well that’s none of whoms business.
grixxis@reddit
Maybe and sometimes.
Please_Go_Away43@reddit
Yes. Deciding whether to use "whom" is something I decide on the spur of the moment, depending on whom I am speaking to. But it is nearly always clear to me where it should go: if you could replace it with "he", use "who"; if "him" would be required, use "whom".
Scary-Egg-5443@reddit
whom I a speaking to. lol
Please_Go_Away43@reddit
That is correct. it is a reordered version of "To whom am I speaking?"
Ouisch@reddit
Yes and yes. Despite my younger brother's mocking whenever I did: "I'm Ouisch and I have no friends but I have my perfect grammar." (PS I had/have friends.)
The_Nermal_One@reddit
No, so, um, no.
Tricky_Ad_1870@reddit
Yes and it depends on context/situation. I do when communicating in a professional setting. I don't in an informal setting when I feel it will make me look pretentious.
Rastus77@reddit
Yes and I couldn’t care less.
Mrs_Gracie2001@reddit
Yes I do.
DragonKing0203@reddit
I know how to use the word, but I’ve only ever used it ironically. I just find it silly.
Scary-Egg-5443@reddit
Me find it silly too.
Brunbeorg@reddit
Yes, but I only use it in more formal situations.
send2steph@reddit
In writing more commonly than ever in speaking.
Away-Cicada@reddit
Yes and yes.
jupitaur9@reddit
It’s like tu/vu. You use “whom” when referring to someone older than you, or someone you have great respect for.
At least, that’s what a lot of people seem to think.
No_Difference8518@reddit
Only sarcastically.
ShakeWeightMyDick@reddit
I do know how to use it properly and I do sometimes use it, though not very often.
K_N0RRIS@reddit
I use it when I feel like being an asshole
Chemical-Mix-6206@reddit
I know when to use it, but seldom do because it sounds excessively formal.
as1126@reddit
Yes and I do.
Informal_Tension9536@reddit
Ryan used me as an object
-Boston-Terrier-@reddit
That’s what she said.
Mad_Dog_1974@reddit
I do know the difference, but I don't generally use "whom" in casual conversation. Even though it's correct, it comes across as pretentious. I do use it in my writing, or when I'm in a professional setting. Also, I've recently reconnected with one of my high school English teachers, and I use "whom" in her presence.
RX3000@reddit
Yes, no.
The only time I would ever use whom is in a very formal letter; "To Whom It May Concern." I would literally never say the word out loud. Ever.
BeckieSueDalton@reddit
Yes, and yes.
RevolutionaryRow1208@reddit
Yes and yes...particularly in writing at work. In casual conversation I'm more likely than not to use them interchangeably as spoken English is often more informal.
FeralSweater@reddit
Yes and rarely
Rob_LeMatic@reddit
It really depends on to whom I'm addressing.
FeralSweater@reddit
Yes and rarely 😉
LaLechuzaVerde@reddit
Same.
Honestly an ambiguous objective pronoun doesn’t come up that often in conversation.
audvisial@reddit
Yes, not doing so is a big pet peeve.
peaveyftw@reddit
Yes and yes, but I also say things like "owing to".
SteampunkExplorer@reddit
Yes. "Whom" is to "who" as "him" is to "he".
topjock002@reddit
I used to avoid using it so I don’t sound stuck up. Now, I use it properly.
remes1234@reddit
I know how to use it. And never would in casual conversation. I believe whom is only part of hyper formal language. This is like avoiding using prepositions to end a sentence with.
pianoAmy@reddit
Grammar nerd here.
The who/whom is so ridiculously simple.
Who is a subject and whom is an object.
On_my_last_spoon@reddit
Kind of but I usually avoid it because I’m never sure!
LeGrandePoobah@reddit
Yes, and yes.
sparkledoom@reddit
Yes. In spoken language, no. In written, yes.
BubbhaJebus@reddit
I use it after prepositions: "with whom", "of whom", "to whom", etc.
glendon24@reddit
No and yes.
FormerlyDK@reddit
No, it’s always eluded me.
ksink74@reddit
Who is nominative case. Whom is objective case.
Much-Leek-420@reddit
“Whom” is a word I never hear in everyday conversation. I’d only use it if I want to sound like a stuffy English butler.
webbess1@reddit
No and no
worrymon@reddit
Yes and yes.
If the answer is he/she, the question is who.
If the answer is him/her, the question is whom
sneezhousing@reddit
Yes and no
Kurt805@reddit
This. How cringe can you be.
xworfx@reddit
You’re cringe.
Boring_Material_1891@reddit
*your
xworfx@reddit
Y’our
cherry_monkey@reddit
*ur
Odd_Main_3591@reddit
Word.
Crazy-Squash9008@reddit
Cringe? To whom?
EpicAura99@reddit
Whoms’t’d’ve???
Prestigious-Fan3122@reddit
Thanks for the lol!
JanaKaySTL@reddit
Yes and yes. I get aggravated at “professional” newsreaders and writers when they drop the M.
jigokubi@reddit
In writing for publication, yes. In speech, no way.
Buhos_En_Pantelones@reddit
No and no, unfortunately.
AwardSalt4957@reddit
Yes. And to be honest, I’m mostly only use it when I’m writing.
Groftsan@reddit
I do.
Whoever doesn't know the difference between the subject and the object of a sentence is a person whom I will never respect.
This also applies to I/me, which I hear people get wrong FAR more often than who/whom.
John and I enjoy the music recorded by Amy and me.
alottanamesweretaken@reddit
Whom’s askin’?
Lucyshnoosy@reddit
Yes to both
SavageMountain@reddit
yes. rarely.
_S1syphus@reddit
No and no. I look it up a couple times a year but the rule for it isnt relevant enough to stick in my brain
Low-Restaurant8484@reddit
I never use it. Don't want to sound like an asshole
Anyhow, language is more then the narrow confines grammer nazis put on things
DrearyBiscuit@reddit
I use it, mostly when I write. I got roasted in some subreddit for using it.
canipayinpuns@reddit
Anytime someone says "whom," I think of this clip from The Office. "Ryan used me as an object" is such a funny, unquotable line and I wish I had a single opportunity to say it irl 😂
judijo621@reddit
Yes. And yes.
But really, this is advanced grammar, and beginning writers should know that if I, a reader who had such rules drilled into my brain by two college educated parents for 19 years, catches it while reading, I will either close the book or kindle forever or (if the story of the book grips me) mark the error in red before moving on.
swansonsafecompany@reddit
Whom cares?
Snezzy_9245@reddit
I like Thurber's fictional quote, "So I says to her, Whom do you think you are anyways?"
Sidetracker@reddit
I don't know how to use it "correctly". But I will use it occasionally if it sounds "correct".
BareTheBear66@reddit
Yes, usually when I'm being snarky. But yes.
Apprehensive-Pop-201@reddit
Yes, I know how and when, but don't always use it.
No_Cellist8937@reddit
If you don’t know try rewriting the sentence using he/him or she/her. If it makes more sense with he/she then use who but if it’s him/her use whom….at least that’s what I do if I’m not sure
OutrageousQuantity12@reddit
I use it like this. Anyone who insists upon using the word “whom” correctly is going to be a tough hang.
Be_Kind_8713@reddit
Yes and rarely, because I don't want to sound pretentious lol
Alarmed_Drop7162@reddit
Objective case.
Jaymac720@reddit
Yes and I’ve had to tell people that it is not just a fancier “who.” It is the objective case of “who,” so it is meant to be used after a verb or preposition. “To whom am I speaking?” “Whom did you tell to do that?”
Ok_Education9679@reddit
yes and yes
8avian6@reddit
To quote weird Al "anyways say 'to whom' don't ever say 'to who'"
1000thusername@reddit
I do.
Kielbasa_Nunchucka@reddit
I know what's right, but I'm not gonna say because you're all jerks who didn't come see my band last night.
Klutzy-Wall-3560@reddit
Yes and no. I see pretty everyone who uses it as impossibly stuck up and pretentious, same for “whilst.”
hyooston@reddit
Whilst is next level mlady shit
Klutzy-Wall-3560@reddit
in a previous era I was very active on the professor sub Reddit. People would come in who were not professors and act like they were and would always wonder how we could tell. They talk like dapper dog. That’s how
BearsLoveToulouse@reddit
Sounds like my father in law. He never naturally says whom (because no one does anymore) but will correct himself. One time he corrected his wife, so I told him linguists would argue that whom is dying out and that the general population can understand what is being said. Naturally he said the linguist would be doing a bad job if they said that.🙄 At least my mother in law appreciated me sticking up for her
sticky-dynamics@reddit
Is "whilst" different than "while"?
Similar_Tie3291@reddit
Whilst is a verb, while would be a noun.
Prestigious-Fan3122@reddit
A friend of mine who lived in the US when we were in junior high school is from England, and returning to England at the end of our ninth grade here.
He is the least stuck up person I have ever met! He does use whilst. I rarely hear it here in the US. I use it once in a blue moon.
Alternative-Law4626@reddit
Yes and yes, all the time.
Altitudeviation@reddit
My local medical center (Central Texas) has attempted to show that they aren't average hillbillies by answering phones with, "XYZ medical center, to whom do I have the pleasure of speaking with?" and always ending with, "Have a blessed day, and stay on the line to complete a short survey."
OldRaj@reddit
Yes and often.
Lucialucianna@reddit
Never
AggravatingShow2028@reddit
Yes and sometimes. If I’m writing in a formal sense I’ll use it. But on here or texting I say “who” idk why but it comes out naturally lol
Electric-Sheepskin@reddit
I still say, "To whom am I speaking?" when the occasion arises. I realize it sounds extremely outdated, but, "Who is this?" just sounds so rude to me.
BearsLoveToulouse@reddit
Exactly. I feel so out of touch saying it. My father in law rarely says it correctly then first time, then will correct himself. What’s the point? We all know what he’s trying to say
ncpowderhound@reddit
Yes, and every time I have to type up a generic email or letter at work.
Steamsagoodham@reddit
I have a general idea of how it’s used, but I never really use it. It doesn’t sound natural to me and just seems unnecessary
d4sbwitu@reddit
Yes, I use it when appropriate.
Tacoshortage@reddit
Yes and Yes, whenever it is appropriate. Which is daily.
distracted_x@reddit
D
RonPalancik@reddit
I do know how.
Whether I use it or not depends on the audience and the formailty of the setting.
Like, I know how to tie a tie but I don't wear one at the swimming pool.
MrLanderman@reddit
Yes and yes...
Pristine_Society_583@reddit
If you do not use "whom", you must use some truly bizarre sentence construction to get around using the objective case -- almost unintelligible I would guess. When asking yourself whether to use "who" vs. "whom", just insert "he/him" and use "whom" wherever "him" would be appropriate.
JagR286211@reddit
Yes and rarely
vanillablue_@reddit
Yes and yes. I’m a linguist and it’s one of my biggest pet peeves lol, but I don’t blame people for not knowing. Kinda like semicolons
porqueboomer@reddit
“This is the sort of arrant pedantry up with which I shall not put.”
jonesnori@reddit
Yes and yes.
ThePolemicist@reddit
There are some words I know how to use properly but don't because it comes across as pretentious. I will say "who" instead of "whom" unless I'm in a professional setting. Similarly, if someone asks how I'm doing, I will say, "I'm good," even though the correct phrase is, "I'm well." To me, these words just sound more natural in typical, day-to-day conversations.
Other words we don't typically say in everyday language: nor and neither. I can use those terms appropriately and will if I'm writing, but I don't use them when speaking. They would jump out at listeners because they aren't words we typically use in everyday spoken language.
Finally, I'll add that the U.S. is a large country, and what I describe as the norm here might not be the norm in other parts of the country.
VeronaMoreau@reddit
Yes but pretty much only in writing
Jolora24@reddit
It’s using the dative case “to whom” and we’re not all stupid. Some of us took Latin, studied multiple languages and have 4 college degrees.
I hate these posts. I don’t randomly go into Reddit and ask “why do all Europeans wear ugly tracksuits?”
We have enough shit to deal with right now, please ask something meaningful or go touch grass.
Amazing-Artichoke330@reddit
It depends on who is using it to say "To whom it may concern."
These_Science9677@reddit
Whom's asking? Nice
Secret-Equipment2307@reddit
I know the proper usage, but no I’ve never used it in my life. I think they should change grammar rules to accept who or whom as the object of a sentence, cause whom just seems kind of archaic and I don’t know anyone below the age of 70 who would ever use it. At least in American English.
Superb_Yak7074@reddit
Yes and yes
The_Menu_Guy@reddit
Yes, but I rarely use it, as it sounds outdated these days, and also a bit pretentious, even if it is the correct form in certain cases. I don’t say whilst either for the same reason.
Gunner1794@reddit
Whom is a made-up word used to trick students.
WatermelonMachete43@reddit
Yes, I know how to use it. Yes, I do use it.
Canukeepitup@reddit
Yeah. To whom is this question being directed?
Atlas7-k@reddit
No. More often than I should.
ChilindriPizza@reddit
I sure do! My grammar is impeccable. Even though (maybe because) English is my second language.
yumyum_cat@reddit
Yes and yes. Just use whom where you’d use him. Ta da.
Mushrooming247@reddit
Yes, but I’m more likely to use “whomst’ve” as a joke.
ThePurityPixel@reddit
Hoobastank 🎸
efranftw@reddit
Whombastank
Informal_Tension9536@reddit
I prefer whomst’d’ve
efranftw@reddit
I know how to use it, and I use it.
However-
I'm very conscious of how pretentious it makes me sound, especially when I rearrange the rest of the sentence so as to not end in a preposition.
Whom did you send the invites to? You sent the invites to whom? To whom did you send the invites.
Vachic09@reddit
I occasionally use it.
Independent_Sea_6317@reddit
Whom wants to know?
Guilty_Objective4602@reddit
Yes and yes.
tacitjane@reddit
Yes. And yes.
Latii_LT@reddit
Clears throat, “to whom this may concern…”
Answer besides that one sentence no. It sounds stuffy in my natural vernacular and excluding very formal work meetings (super rare) I don’t care to speak grammatically correct English. “I be talking how I want to talk” for example sounds crazy on paper but no one bats an eye when I say it aloud in casual conversation. Again only place I make an effort is pure business mode and then I talk like a flight stewardess with very nice articulated words and beautiful sentence structure.
inkseity@reddit
Yes for both, but I only really use whom in creative writing.
Diffballs@reddit
No and no.
fromwayuphigh@reddit
Yes, and yes.
RoosterzRevenge@reddit
I use it when the bell tolls.
teslaactual@reddit
I do but I prefer to use whomst to annoy the grammar police
duke_awapuhi@reddit
Yes. Nope
MoldyWorp@reddit
Yes and yes.
Appropriate-Food1757@reddit
Yes I know. But I don’t use it ever.
MillieBirdie@reddit
Yes and I use it in writing but not in speech cause it would sound pretentious (and I rarely am talking about 'who' in that context anyway).
Mad-Hettie@reddit
Yes and sometimes. Depends on the situation.
MeanderFlanders@reddit
Yes, sometimes I use it in work emails. The formal ones to regulators.
PsychologicalBat1425@reddit
Yes, I do. In the US you see it more often in writing rather than speech.
rolyoh@reddit
Yes. Dative vs accusative/nominative cases. However, English rules have become modified through colloquial use and placement of prepositions at the end of sentences has now become commonplace. Therefore, the rules are very flexible. Instead of asking the question, "to whom does this book belong?" we normally ask, "who does this book belong to?" rather than, "whom does this book belong to?"
BambiFarts@reddit
I know what's proper, but still "whom" is a word I rarely use. There are 200 other things degrading faster, and so I choose my battles.
"I know, right?" grinds on my nerves a lot more.
Shandrith@reddit
Yes, and occasionally. It isn't a very common word for me, since it comes across as either formal or pretentious depending on the circumstances
WiseQuarter3250@reddit
In terms of the common vernacular, it is fading from use. Most of the population doesn't use the term.
I might use it in formal writing, but not in casual conversation because I receive strange looks when I use it.
WouldYaEva@reddit
More in writing than speaking. In writing, I can match up subjects and predicates so I know which one to use.
GreenBeanTM@reddit
1) I did at one point and could probably put in the brain power to remember but-
2) It is no longer the 1800’s, so no.
sn0rto@reddit
No😭..... No 😭😭
Genetics4533@reddit
Probably and never. It sounds pretentious in non-academic American english. I work as a software architect and regularly communicate with non-engineers. I'm already using a lot of jargon, so using formal non-jargon words won't help communication.
I work for British company and don't feel the same when they use whom, because I know it's more engrained in British-english.
Ayn_Rambo@reddit
Yes. Who and whom are the same as she and her or he and him or they and them.
Those damn paw print stickers that say “Who Saved Who?” bug me. It’s “who saved whom?” fer crissakes!
DepressoExpresso98@reddit
Yes and rarely. I feel like it’s phasing out of common language so I use it when it feels right but I don’t correct myself or consciously try to use it
yozaner1324@reddit
Yes, but no not often.
Jazzlike_Way_9514@reddit
Yes and yes.
Whom told you I didn’t?
blnd_snow@reddit
Whom is asking?
MotherofaPickle@reddit
Yes and just this morning while talking to my 6yo.
AtheistAsylum@reddit
Yes and yes.
sundial11sxm@reddit
Yes, and sometimes
Cranberry_Surprise99@reddit
I know how to properly mix coca plant with gasoline, industrial lye, and battery acid in order to make cocaine for my dealer, for whom I owe a great debt.
What was the question again?
NeptuneAndCherry@reddit
Yes and yes. Since I know how and when to use it, it feels performative to not use it. Like I'm purposely dumbing down my speech to be less intimidating. I spent too many years doing that, and I don't want to do it anymore.
SassyMoron@reddit
The trick with "whom" is that it's like the difference between "I" and "me." If you change the sentence to be about yourself, than if you use I or me, now you know which one.
Who may I say is calling? "I am calling" check
Whom may I say is calling? "Me is calling" nope
To whom it may concern - "it concerns me" check
To who it may concern - "it concerns I" nope
etc
DankItchins@reddit
I know how to use it, but unless I'm ironically trying to fancy talk I don't bother.
TheOfficialKramer@reddit
Yes, but nobody uses it. Using it would make you wierd.
kaiju505@reddit
I know how to use it but I don’t use it in speech. Writing I use when called for.
CheemsBorgar92@reddit
I believe so.
Parking_Champion_740@reddit
Yes and yes
panaceaXgrace@reddit
Yes but mostly no. Proper diction doesn't really matter when you sound like Daisy May Moses.
BAMspek@reddit
I use it sometimes but mostly to piss off my girlfriend. Nothing irritates someone more than correcting them by saying “from whom”
Winter_drivE1@reddit
I know how to use it. I actively avoid it and wish I could live to see the day when "whom" is completely obsolete so we can finally stop talking about it.
Waiting_for_clarity@reddit
I do and I do. I use it more often than the average person, but not correctly every single time.
Curmudgy@reddit
Yes and yes.
A quick search turned up a criticism I made on Reddit of a book where the author had a 50s era journalist with a prep school background saying “for who”. While I’m not going to routinely criticize writing that does so in the present, I expect an author choosing to write 50s era educated characters to have dialogue realistic for that era and class.
CRO553R@reddit
Whom's asking?
MagicalPizza21@reddit
Yes, yes
CaptainPunisher@reddit
Yes and yes. To whom do you think you're talking?
FWIW, if I'm speaking informally, which is usually the case, I don't worry about it. When I'm in game show mode and hosting trivia, I'm as exact and formal as possible.
shutupimrosiev@reddit
Yes and occasionally. If I didn't have casual conversations most of the time, I'd probably use "whom" more often, but I do still use it sometimes.
booknookcook@reddit
Kinda and sometimes
BrackenFernAnja@reddit
Yes and yes
WellWellWellthennow@reddit
Yes.
Infinite_Escape9683@reddit
Yes, when the word stands in for a direct or indirect object IN THE SUBCLAUSE, not the main clause.
No.
prevknamy@reddit
Yes and I always use it properly. I judge people who don't
Icy-Whale-2253@reddit
Yes
Sample-quantity@reddit
Yes and yes. A common use is "To whom am I speaking?"
nemmalur@reddit
Yes and I will judge people for using it incorrectly. I don’t mind if you use who for everything but if you use whom it had better be right.
Ok_Kiwi8365@reddit
Yes and yes
alchemycoast@reddit
Ryan used me as an object
ThePurityPixel@reddit
I do. And I do. Often.
If ever I accidentally use the wrong form, I apologize and correct my error.
Rob_LeMatic@reddit
You should apologize whenever you use it correctly or not, just to keep everyone on their toes
Nondescript_Redditor@reddit
yes
Cute_Repeat3879@reddit
Whom are you going to call? Ghostbusters!
brickbaterang@reddit
To whom are you referring to?
TheDreadfulGreat@reddit
To whom do you speak? Depends on who is asking…
fantastikalizm@reddit
Yes. It replaces him and hers.
fantastikalizm@reddit
Yes and yes. I can be a grammar absolutist, but the farther from school I get, the least confident I feel.
My coworker regularly asks me to proofread technical docs. I'm happy to do it. But if we are on the internet, and your point was clear, I typically don't say anything. An exception is when a non-english speaker says something that means something different than intended. I compliment them and offer a suggestion.
inspctrshabangabang@reddit
You use whom when you are referring to the subject of the predicate. Everyone knows this.
NanR42@reddit
Yes and sometimes
petey629@reddit
Yes and yes
IPreferDiamonds@reddit
Yes and yes
East_Honey2533@reddit
I'm talking about Susan, who is the subject. She has a daughter whom is not the subject.
Electronic_Screen387@reddit
Yeah, it's not rocket science.
Key-Candle8141@reddit
Nope and nope
InevitableRhubarb232@reddit
Yes. Yes.
MacSteele13@reddit
Whom cares?
YankeeDog2525@reddit
No and no.
Native speaker. Whom is doomed in the ever evolving nature of language.
evil_burrito@reddit
Yes and yes.
It's actually not that difficult. "Who" is a subject pronoun and "whom" is an object pronoun.
Fit-Rip-4550@reddit
Yes. I use it in speech and writing.
mostlygray@reddit
Yes and yes. My grandma was a stickler. He=who, him=whom. Of whom are you speaking? I'm speaking of him. Who went to the store? He did.
TarHeelFan81@reddit
Yes. Who’s asking? 😃
Jdawn82@reddit
Yes and yes
Tommy_Wisseau_burner@reddit
Used to and no
CoverCommercial3576@reddit
Yes and yes
BayouLuLu@reddit
Yes and yes
gmanose@reddit
Of course and yes I do
LongjumpingHorse3050@reddit
Whom is asking?
JJR1971@reddit
Yes, but only because I studied German in High School & College. Learning another language helps you better understand your own.
Pitiful_Lion7082@reddit
If the answer could be him/her/them, it is acceptable to use "whom"
sgtm7@reddit
No and no.
rozzingit@reddit
Yes and mostly no, at least in regular conversation. I might use it in formal writing.
Crafty_Lavishness_79@reddit
Yes and sometimes. Depends on the sentence and the impact I need for the sentence
ButtSluts9@reddit
Whomst.
distracted_x@reddit
Most of the time yes and no. People don't generally speak that way in daily conversation even if it is correct, it seems formal.
rainidazehaze@reddit
Yes and sometimes.
lyricoloratura@reddit
Yes, and all the time — as recently as earlier today. But I’m a grammar nerd who also uses semicolons in texts, so not a typical American**.
**Considering what “typical Americans” act like these days, I don’t have a even a little bit of a problem with that. 😳
ianfromdixon@reddit
Yes and yes. If it should be he or she, the correct word is “who”, if him or her, it’s “whom.”
aeraen@reddit
I automatically use both when appropriately. When used correctly, it doesn't sound pretentious at all.
Impressive_Ad8715@reddit
Yes… it’s actually not even complicated at all haha. Who vs whom is the same as he vs him
redditreader_aitafan@reddit
Yes and yes
winteriscoming9099@reddit
Yes I know how to use it, but I don’t use it all too often.
SquashDue502@reddit
Yes but I don’t use it in everyday speech or writing because it sounds pretentious to me
sticky-dynamics@reddit
I know how to use it. I do so when I don't think it will stand out like a sore thumb.
therealgookachu@reddit
Yes and yes.
Why_Teach@reddit
Yes. And I absolutely do.
BandanaDee13@reddit
I do know how to use it. And I follow the rules in writing sometimes, but less frequently in speech.
It’s a lot like the predicate nominative (“it is I”). Many people know it’s “technically correct” but it’s too formal for most purposes. It sounds a bit stilted.
erin_burr@reddit
We're not a people for whom that's necessary.
I use it correctly when it's part of a phrase I'm quoting. Like "to whom it may concern." But it's not a grammatical necessity in our vernacular speech so I have no issue asking "who did you call?"
berdulf@reddit
Yes and very rarely. It feels like an anachronism. “Whence” and “whither” have gone out of use.
troycalm@reddit
Ask not for whom the bill tolls
Neb-Nose@reddit
Yes, and mostly yes.
GrowlingAtTheWorld@reddit
It’s not very common for me to use whom but I know when to use it. But Hemingway was a fan of the word.
bayala43@reddit
Easy trick is replace the whom/who with him/he. If the question is “To whom did you give the package?”, the answer is “to him”. If the question is “who has the package?” The answer is “he has it”. If that makes any sense.
I rarely use it though, it makes me feel pretentious. Instead I say shit like “whomst the fuck ate my leftovers?” The answer is my wife.
ssgtdunno@reddit
Yes and no. My colloquial speech is much more comfortable than trying to sound “proper”.
TorrEEG@reddit
Yes, no
I usually use very casual language to make the people around me comfortable.
AZJHawk@reddit
Yes. Rarely use it. Depends on the person with whom I am speaking.
GinX-@reddit
I do and I do.
Fleiger133@reddit
Nope and nope.
zusia@reddit
Yes, I know how to use “whom” and I can get very cranky when native speakers use it incorrectly.
SabresBills69@reddit
whom is asking this?
figgypudding531@reddit
I know how to use it but I don’t because it sounds pretentious
biggoofydoofus@reddit
No and never
The_sad_zebra@reddit
Not exactly, and only if I have to write "to whom it may concern"
radicalresting@reddit
are you srsly asking all of america this question WHOM do you think you are
non-rhotic_eotic@reddit
In writing, yes and yes.
In speaking, yes and mostly no. It depends upon whom I'm addressing and the occasion.
monsterdaddy4@reddit
Yes and yes.
Matt_Shatt@reddit
Ryan used me as an object.
moskowizzle@reddit
It's 'whom' when it's the object of the sentence and 'who' when it's the subject.
General_Ad_6617@reddit
I know how to use it properly but I also avoid using it.
GreenTravelBadger@reddit
Of course!
Maurice_Foot@reddit
‘Whom’ is the short form of ‘Hoomins’.
FlappyClap@reddit
Yes
nosidrah@reddit
Yes and no
Remarkable_Fun7662@reddit
People use it in partitives like some of whom a couple of whom, etc
logaboga@reddit
Yes and no
ophaus@reddit
Absolutely. Who is a subject, whom is an object.
ZoeTravel@reddit
Grammer check sorts that stuff for me
Scribal8@reddit
One has to be careful because one never know to whom they're speaking these days. “Whom” is just too much for some people.
ElaborateCantaloupe@reddit
Yes. Whom is asking?
Crazy-Squash9008@reddit
Her is asking!
RoMoCo88@reddit
Me is asking.
ngshafer@reddit
I know HOW to use it, but in practice I almost never hear it used.
Waagtod@reddit
I only use it when I'm doing my rich snob impression. "To whom am I conversing with at this moment?" Ya don't get extra points or money fer' usin' the goody grammars.
sherman40336@reddit
When the who is not me or you.
Girl_Mitsubishi@reddit
I'm sorry. Do you actually think all americans are stupid? Grammar is actually a thing. STFU. Now , that's poor grammar. 🤭
chonteeeze@reddit
Yes and sometimes
OrenSchroeder@reddit
Whom me?
Dense_Gur_2744@reddit
Yes and he’s, but rarely while I’m speaking.
ThimbleBluff@reddit
Yes and yes, though I don’t use it often in casual speech even when it might technically be called for.
Also James Thurber had a famous column about who and whom where he hilariously garbled the distinction.
https://languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=3955
hobokobo1028@reddit
Yes and yes
jessek@reddit
Yes and not very often
kechones@reddit
Yes and yes. And I can’t stand people who DON’T know how to use it, but use it anyway to sound smart.
Other_Bill9725@reddit
If the answer is him the question is whom.
DiscontentDonut@reddit
I do, and I am able to use it properly. Though I'll admit, it's rare that the time comes for it to really be used. And if it does, there are so many different ways the situation could be phrased to avoid it naturally.
SouthernTrauma@reddit
Yes. And yes.
47106103@reddit
I do know but I’m not telling because you guys are all jerks who didn’t come see my band.
Realistic-Wealth8891@reddit
Yes and no
Hungry-Wrongdoer-156@reddit
Yes, and rarely (because I also know the word "anachronistic").
machagogo@reddit
Yes and yes.
OpeningChipmunk1700@reddit
Yes; it’s the objective case. You use it when using the pronoun as an object, like of a verb or a preposition.
I use it in both spoken and written writing. Sometimes I just use “who” when speaking.
LetMeBeAngry@reddit
Maybe and no, and I rarely hear it used
m_leo89@reddit
No because I’m a dumb American.
rosietherosebud@reddit
I do know how to use it, but I usually choose not to so as not to come across as too hoity toity
Maronita2025@reddit
To whom would you go if your supervisor was unavailable?
paddington-1@reddit
Yes and yes!
kobayashi_maru_fail@reddit
Yes, no.
(Oregon)
musical_dragon_cat@reddit
Yes, it's used as an object in a sentence, and I use it appropriately
clovismordechai@reddit
I do and sometimes
silviazbitch@reddit
Yes and yes. My excuse is that I studied 6 years each of classical Greek and Latin in my school years. I have no excuse for that.
Aahhhanthony@reddit
Yes and yes.
eKs0rcist@reddit
Whom wants ta know
broberds@reddit
Of course I do. Whom doesn’t?
AggravatingOne3960@reddit
Yes and yes.
It's the objective case, to be used analogously to him or them.
namrock23@reddit
yes and yes
Miserable_Smoke@reddit
No and yes. I wrong lots.
Spongedog5@reddit
Sort of, it's more of an instinctual sense for when to use it based on the patterns I've seen other people use it than an actually understanding of the rules.
I look up the actual rules from time to time but they don't seem to stick in my mind very well.
StandardLocal3929@reddit
Yes to both.
Prestigious-Wolf8039@reddit
Whom do you think you are to ask me that?
o_simple_thing@reddit
Yes. And yes.
No-Faithlessness4294@reddit
Absolutely. There’s a common bumper sticker that people who are into rescue animals will put on their cars. It reads “who rescued who?” and it never fails to make my blood boil.
Fit-Ferret7972@reddit
Yes, and usually yes
tanya6k@reddit
I think my usage of that word has been reduced to the opener:
To whom this may concern
SmoovCatto@reddit
Yes and yes. Colloquial exceptions, such as "Who do you trust?", where to be correct sounds affected.
A whole class of people think "whom" sounds affected in any case, and simply never use it.
GreatRecipeCollctr29@reddit
Yes, I use it when writing emails, or to handwritten letters too.
Blahkbustuh@reddit
Yes.
I had a phase at the end of high school and into college where I did.
Nowadays, no, not really. Using "whom" correctly stands out way more than using "who" for everything incorrectly. I'm not around literary or people who know the difference on a daily basis.
No_Pass8028@reddit
Yes and no.
Crazy-Squash9008@reddit
Yes and yes. It's not particularly difficult.
TheVentiLebowski@reddit
It's "howm" to use it.
Ok_Dog_4059@reddit
Not at all.
Educational-Ad-385@reddit
I try. If Im not sure, I look it up.
Crazy_Response_9009@reddit
Whom the fuck actually does? No one, that's whom!!
Ok_Material_5634@reddit
Yes'm, I do'm. I learned it in school'm.
Jsaun906@reddit
Yes and yes
Gertrude_D@reddit
Yes to both. I only remember it now because I took a foreign language, and I teach a very entry level foreign language. I use this example a lot because the language I teach (Czech) uses noun declension and it's a confusing concept for most people.
proximusprimus57@reddit
Exactly whom do you think you're speaking to?
Threeboxerlover@reddit
Yes and yes.
74NG3N7@reddit
I believe yes and yes. When writing, I do it “properly” often. When speaking, the level of “proper” language depends on with whom I am speaking.
Gotta assimilate a bit here and there.
Mouse-Direct@reddit
Yes and yes. Who is the subject of a verb and whom for the object of a verb or preposition. “Who is going to the game, and with whom are you going?”
theClanMcMutton@reddit
Sometimes and sometimes. I know you're supposed to say "to/for whom." Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't.
Fancy-Restaurant4136@reddit
Yes and sometimes
Putasonder@reddit
Yes and occasionally.
No_Street8874@reddit
No and yes.
Living_Murphys_Law@reddit
Yes, and absolutely not
DJPaige01@reddit
Yes & Yes
Wixenstyx@reddit
Yes, and occasionally.
SnooPineapples280@reddit
Yes and yes.
Certain_Store_619@reddit
I genuinely don’t know how
the_dog_goes_bork@reddit
You use it in the same place you would use him/her/them. Who = she/he/they. Once I learned this I became pretty easy. But if I got it wrong someone let me know.
NorwegianSteam@reddit
Yes, and yes.
dopefiendeddie@reddit
No and no
Weightmonster@reddit
No and no.
therynosaur@reddit
I still don't know how to use that damn word even after studying.
pikkdogs@reddit
Maybe? A little.
TrashCanEnigma@reddit
I believe I know how to use it. I use it occasionally, but not in everyday speech. It's like "formal mode" for me, y'know? And many people DON'T know how to use it.
MissouriHere@reddit
Maybe kinda and absolutely not.
TRiC_2020@reddit
Yes and correctly.
mustang6172@reddit
I think I do, thus according to all scientific research, I don't.
MrLongWalk@reddit
Yes and yes
DOMSdeluise@reddit
yes, very rarely
LSATMaven@reddit
Yes and yes.
cans-of-swine@reddit
No and no