Hi everyone,
i’m 22 and three months into my master’s at UTS. before I came to Australia, my dad had already been fighting stage-4 cancer for almost three years. when he was first diagnosed, our family fell apart — I did too — but there were periods where he seemed a little better, and hope came back in small, quiet ways. right before I left, things turned sharply worse. I kept wavering: stay or go. my parents looked me in the eye and said, “go — build your life.” so I came, with a heavy heart, promising I’d make him proud.

since arriving, I call home often through my mum because he’s usually too tired or in pain to talk long. sometimes he just listens to my voice. recently the doctors have said the cancer has spread too far and there isn’t a real path to improvement. now I’m standing at a crossroads that doesn’t feel like a choice so much as two kinds of love pulling in different directions. part of me wants to get on a plane, hold his hand, help my mum, say everything that can only be said face-to-face, and have less to regret later. the other part hears his words — “don’t wait on me; build your future” — and knows that staying in Sydney keeps my studies steady, my small freelance wins alive, and the path open that he and my mum wanted for me. one road gives me precious time I can never recover; the other honours the dream they planted in me, even if it breaks my heart in the short term.

I’m speaking with the university about compassionate options and trying to understand visas, travel, and what’s possible if I need to be away for a little while. but beyond the admin, I’m looking for human wisdom. if you’ve been here — as an international student, a son or daughter far from home, someone who had to choose between presence and promise — what helped you decide? what questions made the fog lift, even a little? I know there isn’t a perfect answer. I just want to make one I can live with — one that honours my dad’s love, my mum’s strength, and the life they wanted me to build.

thank you for reading. any advice, stories, or gentle reality checks would mean a lot.