Were you popular, unpopular or completely unknown at school?

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PynkPatterned@reddit

Somewhere in between, probably veering towards unpopular.

I was very academic, quiet, top set in everything but not remotely sporty, braces, glasses, acne, a bit socially awkward but had a decent size group of friends. I was

As an aside, the popular kids (i.e. the very attractive, all-rounder people that the teachers loved and would be head girl/head boy) would call my friendship group the rejects ha.

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Able_While_974@reddit

I got bullied by the kids who were bullied. I was in no doubt where I was in the pecking order, and 40 years later I still bear the emotional scars.

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I'm sorry about this and how it has affected you. I'm really curious though. I was pretty much at the very bottom of the pecking order too. But there were some people sort of weaker than me (probably weaker-willed, as I don't think anyone was weaker than me physically), and I was mean to some of them on various occasions. Definitely to the ones I found annoying.

In some cases I was actually getting a bit of revenge on someone who'd done something to me, or on someone who had tried to bully me and failed (indeed, almost everyone in the school did something to me, or tried).

I didn't do this constantly or anything (I wouldn't know how), it was a number of scattered incidents across Y8 - Y11, and I wasn't verbal. But, messed with them in some way on those occasions.

But in those moments I did feel empowered and exhilarated. Plus even though I was so unpopular, I discovered that I could usually find allies willing to help me out in these endeavours. I'm curious to know how the bullied people bullied you. I hope that you have more friends around you these days.

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Able_While_974@reddit

Thanks. From university onwards I found real friends and some respect. At school the bullying was a variety of things, such as ostracising, name calling, tripping me up or spreading untrue rumours.

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Equivalent_Deer_8667@reddit

This really resonates!!

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Tight-Principle-743@reddit

Top set not very athletic, west ham fan in north London, exquisitely good at science and I wear glasses, what do you think?

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seahorsebabies3@reddit

I had glasses, braces, no-tits and was in top set maths. I know how (un)popular I was

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AliceMorgon@reddit

I had monstrous tits by 16 (HH cup). How I would have envied you.

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bradpitt3@reddit

We're you a popular girl?

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AliceMorgon@reddit

I was one of the weirdos who snuck off to the nearby university during lunch breaks or classes where no one would notice you missing to smoke weed with the students and talk about stuff like Nietzsche and Marx. So no, I wouldn’t say popular. People knew who I was, but when that’s because you’re the Irish scholarship kid and you’re a total fucking nerd, it does not exactly translate often to friendship. I had my own little group, and that was enough.

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dazedan_confused@reddit

RIP your DMs.

Also, and I don't want to bring up any demons of the past, but friends of mine who were in a similar position to you all have a story where they think they got away with something/got punished by a teacher with a wandering eye because of their assets. Did you have that?

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dazedan_confused@reddit

I'm curious, did all the hard work pay off? (I'm talking the braces and the top set maths, not, you know).

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seahorsebabies3@reddit

Kinda, I’m not super well off financially, but when I left home, I no longer had braces, I wore contacts as much as I wanted to, got a better hairdo and wardrobe (embraced my figure). I got married, we bought a house and have kids and cats. Whilst I’m still not popular, I have friends, family, stability and am able to go on holidays abroad.

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dazedan_confused@reddit

To be fair, it sounds like you're living the good life, so fair play to you!

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jeffcarpthefisheater@reddit

Photo or its not true

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bl4h101bl4h@reddit

Did you forget much of Reddit understands sincerity over humour?

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jeffcarpthefisheater@reddit

No no, I've been here for a while. And I'm not karma-hungry so.the down votes are ok. Just thought I'd better clarify the situation at some point!

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bl4h101bl4h@reddit

Well, I chuckled so your effort wasn't wasted 👍

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

Creepy

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h00dman@reddit

Have a seat...

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TheRiddlerTHFC@reddit

Being a West ham is enough for me to bully you

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Which_Performance_72@reddit

What decade did you go? The people like that in my year were very popular. Granted I grew up in east London

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Tight-Principle-743@reddit

I went to school in the 90’s so it’s pretty much as you imagine

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steptoeshorse@reddit

I was the opposite. Thick as shit but really good at sport. My life would've been easier than yours but I peaked at 18. Been a steady decline since and I'm still thick as shit so nerds for the long game I guess.

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The_Banned_Account@reddit

Unknown, the weird kid at the back who never spoke. Got bullied by a lad until I eventually snapped after a year and threw an office chair at his head in year 8. Even after that I was just the “quiet weird kid that you don’t mess with”

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1979-Robot@reddit

Definitely in the unpopular-unknown region

Bullied from primary to about year 9 in high school, not had many friends despite trying to fit in, found school and high school a terrible time really

Was in most of the top sets apart from obviously sport, if you weren't good at sport in my school you weren't liked. Was a bit of a loner, quiet,liked to read, not really conducive to being popular !

Ironically, discovered Warhammer and D&D at school, ended up with 1 main friend and his older brothers/cousins as friends for most of school and my early 20s

Went to school with some people who at one point were quite famous rugby players, one of who in particular ruined his life and looks like a tramp now, slight vilification as he was one of my bullies

Apparently at school a few of the popular girls thought I was quite good looking but the popular sporty areseholes warned them off me

Year 11 was horrible, hit the point of no return with one of my bullies and smacked him in the face after he'd pushed me too far, all went a bit downhill from there though, got jumped and beaten quite severely after school one night by him and his friends, ended up not sitting my GCSEs

Did manage to get into college and into a decent job after school luckily, decided then to change my life, rest all my exams, got really good grades and a good decent job, left my home town for 20 years, turned my life around with a family and 2 children

Have moved back to my home town now, mainly for work purposes, but I do see a lot of people from school who quite honestly, look like shit, don't recognise me - actually stood in a queue in a shop next to one of them who didn't recognise me at all

I do think the culture at my school was horrid, but if I was in school now I'd fit in so well !

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hunsnet457@reddit

Well known but not particularly popular. I didn’t really have a single friendship group but fit in with most social groups except 1 or 2.

I’d say the majority of the year knew me and we were friendly, but I personally only really considered about 5 people across all the school social groups my actual friends.

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JD_wh1te@reddit

This very much describes my experience too. Had lots of friendship groups at school but didn’t have many close friends or deep friendships, which is evident now I’m in my mid thirties and only really friends with 1 or 2 people from school. I did have a lot going on during my teenage years health wise though which likely had an impact as I missed a fair amount of school and couldn’t really play sports either.

Wide range of interests probably helped. Always been into a wide range of sports (still am, drives my wife mad 😂), top sets in all subjects, some geeky interests and liked computer games, which I was fairly good at too

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fatinternetcat@reddit

you're literally me

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TickTackTonia@reddit

This resonates with me also. I spoke to everybody and didn't enter a classroom worried that I'd have no one to sit next to or talk to.

But honestly, I still don't remember anyone being actually popular, except maybe the one lad that everybody fancied who was actually nice to people!

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PurplePlodder1945@reddit

This was me!! I’m now 55 and people still recognise me straight away and say hello on the rare occasion I’ve bumped into someone from school. I haven’t changed visually. It’s embarrassing for me because I often have no idea who they are unless they were people I hung out specifically with

There was an open day of my old school the other day because it’s being demolished and I did feel a little sad that other girls were in groups of 2 or 3 because they’d stayed close from school and I didn’t have anyone to go with because I didn’t. Everyone was really friendly as I bumped into them though and knew me straight away

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ClassroomDowntown664@reddit

yes what you said is exactly what my school was like. my credibility went up bit in yare 9 when one of the popular girls in one of the groups started to flirt with me which then turned into my a relationship of sorts

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gummibear853@reddit

I could copy and paste this to describe me. Wasn’t one of the popular kids, but the cool kids liked me enough to ensure I wasn’t a recluse

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Busy_End_6655@reddit

Neither particularly popular or unpopular, although I was more popular than most with the girls. Having an attractive, older off and on girlfriend in another school probably helped in that regard.

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PresidentPopcorn@reddit

That happened to me but instead of it being the popular girl, it was the girl I covered in pigs blood at prom. Boy was my face red.

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Motor_Possibility_22@reddit

I was top set in every subject, got the best GCSE grades in my school, never had detention, played some sport averagely but more to ‘fit in’, but I was not cool or popular. I seemed to go under the radar like a lot of others here, the bullies didn’t mind me because I was ok at sport and I didn’t make myself a target, the cool kids knew me but I wasn’t in the group. Got through school pretty unscathed, was quite a good time in my life

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Slartitartfast@reddit

The people who were least popular at school turn into the best adults. The popular kids at my school are now all living in new builds with grey sofas and leased audis. None of my adult friends were popular at school, all of them were nerdy about something.

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shooteshute@reddit

Copium

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Slartitartfast@reddit

I dunno dude. I like my adult friends a lot. I meet people who were sporty and popular at school and they're almost always boring 40 year olds. I had friends at school, but we weren't popular, we were music and art nerds.

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xTrustMe@reddit

The popular kids are doing her great then?

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Slartitartfast@reddit

Living the tiny garden, live, laugh,love, works in sales, American fridge dream, aye.

The unpopular kids are all interesting adults because they spent their school years doing weird stuff, then went on to be weird 20 somethings, and are now interesting 40 year olds. The coolest people you know were definitely the least popular teenagers (at least where I went to school).

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JameSdEke@reddit

You’re judging people based on the house they buy, how they decorate it and the car they drive?

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Slartitartfast@reddit

Uh, yes...?

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FrivolousMilkshake@reddit

Live, Laugh, Love, amirite?

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_Frog_Enthusiast_@reddit

I was undiagnosed autistic and transgender. I was treated like a mixture of dirt and a weird pet to laugh at

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Any-Class-2673@reddit

I was unpopular. Unfortunately, looking back on things, I was bullied a lot more then I think I realised at the time. I was that weird kid, had a few friends. I was in mostly top sets. I'd say most people did know who I was, but mainly because they weren't saying nice things about me. I recently found my old Facebook and it was horrible seeing their comments on my posts and how I tried to laugh along with them when really they were just taking the piss out of me.

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Sarrebas89@reddit

I had my own group of friends but got bullied by nearly everyone else. I was quiet and skinny with ginger hair and also got half decent exam results.

Tbh, I don't remember half the people I was in school with. Though one of my friends works with a guy who made my life a living hell. Apparently, he remembers me and he asked after me once, conveniently forgetting that he bullied me. I kind of found it amusing 😂

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snusbeer@reddit

I peaked in high school lol

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Voodoopulse@reddit

I was in top sets and played on every team going. For a lad life doesn't really get much easier with making friends at school.

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PatsyFlicker@reddit

Similar experience, top set, played sports. Feel like any lad can walk into any walk of life and make friends if they have moderate intelligence and some common ground to talk about. I've never struggled to converse with my wifes friends husbands. Men make friends first then find similarities later

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Da1sycha1n@reddit

Being top set was definitely not the key to being popular in my school. They don't like 'boffs' round ere

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Enigma1984@reddit

Being good at sport let you get away with a lot at my school. If you were a good football player you were popular, didn't matter how smart or stupid or ugly or handsome you were.

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ILovePencils13@reddit

Most popular boy in my class was really short and very ginger, but he was great at loads of sports so he got away with it. If he hadn't been, I imagine he would have been mercilessly bullied.

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ihatethis2022@reddit

This guy in my school is now about as wide as he is tall. Obviously decided he didnt like being the small short one and hit the gym.

Thought he had somehow grown 6 inches when I'd first saw him there after a 20 year gap. Nope, just takes up a lot more space now.

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Moppo_@reddit

On the opposite end, if you didn't care about football and had no skill whatsoever and kicked the ball the "wrong" way, people would treat you like you just ruined their chance at a professional career.

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PartyPoison98@reddit

Depends exactly when and where you went to school. In my experience, top set classes had 30-40 students crammed in whereas bottom set was <10 of the most disruptive, so the majority of the year were in top or second set.

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Voodoopulse@reddit

It's when you add the two things together as a boy, when you do well at sports no one gives a shit about you also being academic because you're automatically one of the lads.

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JTB_94@reddit

I was the same fortunately. It also helped that I wasn’t scared of girls either 😂.

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PatsyFlicker@reddit

My year wasn't particularly big, 120ish people I'd say, I was relatively popular. I played sports, was on Football team and played for Year 11 and Year 10 while I was in Year 9, so relatively well known by older kids as well.

Being "popular" in English schools isn't anything like it's made out to be in American movies. I'm relatively introverted so all it's done is increase the amount of people I dread to bump into in the supermarket

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Venomenon-@reddit

I was the school goth. Top sets, very quiet.

Make of that what you will.

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ComplexBeautiful5152@reddit

My year group at secondary school was tiny around 60 of us, my sons year group is around 180. I wasn't good at sport and was a bit chubby. I floated between groups would say I was a bit popular. looking back it was an okay time wouldn't want to go these days. so much pressure

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Esqulax@reddit

I guess.. middle-of-the-road?
Had a decent group of friends, wasn't the prime target for bullies. Did well in some classes and badly in others.
Honestly if I met someone from my year now, I doubt I recognise them and wouldn't expect them to recognise me. The year was divided into 8 forms, each with about 20 folk in each. Of those 8, they were loosely split into 2 groups of 4 when it came to class schedules so we'd know people from our own form well, people from the same 'half' kinda well, and only really see people from the other half at lunch or in a couple of classes that were optional - Like Drama, IT, Music - They would just have a mix of people from the whole year.

A year after finishing college, My whole family moved away from the city, so I've never really just ran into anyone from school apart from a couple of weird co-incidences - One guy from my year lived here for a year while his partner was doing a masters in the local Uni, and when I did my first year of uni, I met a girl who was the sister of another girl from my year (Who's mum was also my year 7 teacher) - and my housemate started dating her.

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PhantomFairy@reddit

Deeply unpopular. The bullying was so bad I hardly went to school.

Years later I ended up in a situation where I had to speak to the lead bully. I asked why did it, they said "we were just kids". Easy to say that when it wasn't your life ripped to shreds.

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eidolon_eidolon@reddit

I despise the 'we were just kids' excuse. They were old enough to know it was cruel and did it anyway. Being under 18 doesn't change that.

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essjay2009@reddit

It’s certainly possible to not fully grasp what’s going on, especially when it’s not obvious or even intentional.

For instance I thought my school, or at least my year, didn’t have any bullies. I don’t think I ever saw or experienced any bullying and I was a fat nerd so would be prime target you’d think. Then towards the end of school two different people went off on my friend group for bullying them by nature of being exclusionary. Basically not including them in things, not hanging out, not talking to them, that sort of thing. It hadn’t even occurred to me that we were having that sort of effect on people I, honestly, never even thought about. I think in much not alive to that sort of thing as an adult, but as a kid I had no idea.

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Morazma@reddit

Nah, that part of your brain isn't fully developed at that age. It's a legitimate way to at least partially explain it even if it doesn't make it right or excuse the behaviour.

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eidolon_eidolon@reddit

Oh bollocks. It's developed enough to know right from wrong. We're talking about teenagers here, not toddlers.

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powermoustache@reddit

Empathy, particularly in males, doesn't fully develop until adulthood.

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IDFGMC@reddit

I was a horrendous bully (verbal mostly) to quite a few kids. Around the age of 16 I finally saw what I'd been doing and tried to apologise and make amends. 35 years later my main victim is one of my closest friends.

The best I can do by way of an explanation is that my parents divorce must have really affected me. I also had a very difficult relationship with my step father from the age of 9.

I know some people are just evil but that's not me, there's not a day goes by without me regretting what I did.

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Moist_Farmer3548@reddit

A lot of my behaviour would have been considered bullying.

I never really got exposed to social interactions that weren't people going really hard into "taking the piss" out of me. I learnt that was the only way to interact with people. It was the only route to popularity... when other people did it to me. When I did it to other people, it was justification for why I was a horrible person and deserved to have no friends.

Not really an excuse but I learnt very early on that most people will be horrible and cruel to others for 5 minutes of popularity, and that popularity is rarely determined by how you treat others.

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Imlostandconfused@reddit

I verbally bullied a couple of people, too. Alongside my closest female friends. All of us are collectively haunted by the things we said- we made a girl leave school. It was very, very bad. We kinda started a chain reaction and gave fuel to girls who were much crueller than us to escalate the bullying beyond just verbal comments. The worst part is that we don't even remember her name. She was only at our school for a brief time and we don't remember her name at all. We've scoured through Facebook and asked around, but nobody remembers. We desperately wanted to apologise, but we were so vile to our victim that we didn't even bother to remember her damn name.

When we're together, often one of us will mention it, and we'll all just go silent for a while. It's probably the worst thing we've each ever done, and we can never make amends for it.

I really commend you for taking responsibility so early and turning things around. I'm about to have a daughter, and while I'm so ashamed about it all, I think I'll tell her about it when she's old enough, so she understands the impact bullying has on victims and also realises that you don't always get the opportunity to apologise.

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Willing_Coconut4364@reddit

Have you bullied him to be your friend. He's playing the long game, what's your back. /s

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pencilthinwriter@reddit

I'm so sorry it was that bad that you hardly went to school. I actually missed hardly a day of school, in many ways I loved being there, and just always hoped the next day would be better. Staying at home was not a great option for me so I suppose school was the best I had. Instead of not going to school I just skipped quite a lot of lessons where I knew the bullying would be the worst. Please feel free to message me btw.

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

In my experience the bullies generally find their right level in life. Of the 2 main offenders in my school year one of them ended up a heroin addict and the other - confirmed many years later - was being mercilessly rogered by one of our science teachers (who was also rogering his younger brother). Karma.

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Appropriate_Wave722@reddit

perhaps the fact that he and his brother were being raped goes some way to explain his antisocial attitude at school, don't ya think?

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

20/20 hindsight is a wonderful thing to possess over 30 years later…

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Appropriate_Wave722@reddit

yeah but you could be like "oh well I empathise with that person" rather than say him being raped by a trusted adult was some kind of karmic realignment. Mate, you're 40-ish and you are relishing in the sexual abuse of a child because said child hurt you three decades ago. It's not right. I get that you feel damaged by them but you've also had three decades to come to terms with it and try to overcome the damage and live your life to its full potential.

And some 40-something saying "lol you got abused as a child, serves you right" does not sound like you have overcame the damage.

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

No I don’t empathise, I simply don’t care at all as they never actually enter my thoughts until this kind of topic gets raised. There were no doubt kids that they were terrorising at the time also going through issues at home - maybe not to such a great degree - but I doubt they were a consideration when bullying was such fun.

Not the job of kids to police or understand this stuff when they are 11-16, that’s on the teachers.

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Appropriate_Wave722@reddit

You might not feel damaged, but you are gloating in the fact that a child was raped.

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

In sorry if it offends you, that’s just how it was at the time. As I said, it’s easy to apply adult thinking when you’re many years away from the events, not quite so easy when you’re in the midst of it.

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Appropriate_Wave722@reddit

You are 30 years away from the events though!

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

I am, my comment was a reflection of how I felt at the time when the full story came out once we’d left school. Now I don’t give two hoots either way.

I’ll repeat my earlier comment though, 20/20 hindsight is a great gift. If we all knew back then that the bullies just needed a big hug then I’m sure it would have been just fine. But that’s not how it works and you know that so I’m not sure what point you’re trying to make really. You weren’t there at the time so it’s impossible for you to understand how bad it was for so many pupils. Kids were having to move schools, being ritually humiliated on a day to day basis for not having the ‘right’ clothes and there was violence/robbery on a very regular basis. There may well have been unknown underlying reasons for that behaviour but excusing it and forgiving it isn’t in the mind of a kid.

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

JFC. Mate, that is such a twisted opinion, and is in no way ‘karma’

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

Tell that to all the kids whose life they made a misery for years.

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

Such an ignorant comment.

Nobody likes a bully. But understanding what influences their actions is important, because in the case you’ve mentioned, they are victims, too.

It’s horrible all-round, and all the victims involved should have been able to get the help and protection they needed (from responsible adults).

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

One of the bullies wasn’t a heroin addict whilst at school, he was just a compete and utter c*nt whose sole enjoyment in life was piling misery onto everyone who he thought weaker than him. Zero sympathy. The other guy lived like a king with all the finest clothes/bikes/etc even though he came from a pretty rough family, turns out he was being ‘paid’ for the abuse he was receiving. He used that perception of being somehow better than others pile on those who didn’t have the outward signs of wealth. The two of together working as a unit caused significant mental and occasional physical harm to many children in my school year and those below. My sympathy for these guys is below ground level. BTW both survived their various ordeals so it’s not as if their experience was terminal.

To quote a famous Tim Cruise line “you weren’t even there man”. It was a hellish experience for many many people - including me until I experienced a growth spurt between 13 & 14 - and the school did very little about it.

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

I’m sorry you had to go through that. It’s utterly shit. I can understand the resentment, etc.

From an outsiders perspective from what you’ve said, those bullies had other issues in their lives. I’m not saying it forgives their actions.

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

It’s fine to think how you do as an adult. As a kid you don’t think about the bully’s thought process and reason for doing what they do.

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

Of course not, as a kid you don’t see things from a greater perspective, especially if you’re the one in the receiving end of abuse.

Are you getting help now? I know stuff doesn’t just disappear from your mind because you got older

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Mobile-Stomach719@reddit

Not an issue, as mentioned, they left me alone once I grew taller than them over the school holidays one summer (well that’s how quick it felt at the time) and started being able to stand up for myself. Bullies don’t like that kind of thing.

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ThatN22Guy@reddit

Once you can stand-up for yourself and they see you’re not easy prey, they back-off (usually).

Again, sorry you had to go through that. Hope you’re in a better place

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PushingDaises13@reddit

Seriously. The first one okay but the second one, if “rogering” is what I think it means that’s just an evil attitude.

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bubonichav@reddit

The kid excuse is a good one.. i also dont get why laws dont exist at school. is it just designed to ruin most people so they will just do what theyre told for the rest of their life

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WaxCatt@reddit

For reference, I finished school this year, if that makes a difference. According to people I know, I was considered the nicest person at school and was well-liked, but hardly anyone talked to me and I didn't really have a social life until a couple of years ago. I think my shyness and low self-esteem meant that I felt like people deserved more competent friends than me and I find interacting with people older than me easier. I was probably a nice, well-behaved person, but forgotten about.

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megthebat49@reddit

None of those are the right word, I would say I was Notorious.

Lots of people knew who I was but I also didn't have many friends. Basically I was an annoying little shit to anyone and everyone and importantly had zero respect for any staff. Among the "bad" kids my antics were admired, apparently people told stories about me for years after I left. I said shit to staff they'd never dare to say and did shit they'd never dare to do. Among the nerds I was hated because they actually wanted to learn and I often disrupted that. And everyone else was somewhere in the middle, either they thought I was kinda entertaining or kinda annoying. Important part is that no one wanted to actually be friends, I had to move school to even make 1 close friend and well he was also the notorious annoying little shit so we got to be annoying little shits together, good times lol

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pajamakitten@reddit

Among the nerds I was hated because they actually wanted to learn and I often disrupted that.

Without trying to sound harsh, you were the sort of kid I would pray every day would not turn up so I could actually learn something.

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megthebat49@reddit

Nope that's not harsh, it's correct. Sure I'd've called you a massive fucking nerd back then but I was an absolute piece of shit of a person as a teenager

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Insertnameherebois@reddit

Same here. Oppositional Demand Avoidance and my basically giving up on every aspect weren't the perfect mix... I was more or less invisible when I started college though.

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megthebat49@reddit

Yeah, college was much better for me, I was doing stuff I actually cared about so wasn't a little shit in class and actually behaved myself. I was also able to find some people into similar things as me and thus had a small group of friends. And so it was basically only those friends and the people in my class that knew who I was, I was quite friendly with the whole class as well, I did a photography BTEC and had more experience and knowledge than most of everyone else so a lot of people knew to be nice to me if they wanted any help with their work lol

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Insertnameherebois@reddit

For me it was more I didnt want to be at school sp acted out but I didn't want to be at college either (did at the start, but someone there dropped out in the December so I didn't have many social connections there) but the difference was I could muck about on my phone

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bubonichav@reddit

I was not popular. Turns out I was/am really handsome but I didn't know it then as people bullied me so badly that I would barely talk to anyone after about age 11.

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DownrightDrewski@reddit

You've just reminded that some little scrote used to call me Max Factor as he thought i was wearing makeup - definitely the strangest "insult" I've ever received.

Apparently I have good eyelashes?

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bubonichav@reddit

lol. i have good eyelashes too haha

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pencilthinwriter@reddit

Extremely unpopular! Everyone hated me lol. But for that reason I don't get forgotten. Be thankful that you were part of a mass of popular people, that you weren't bullied and that you just sort of slid through school without being constantly singled out for negative attention.

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Opposite_Strategy_25@reddit

Imagine Jay from the Inbetweeners without the pathological lying. An exaggerated Jack the Lad attitude to hide my insecurities. I was a closet geek and looking back there was maybe 1-2 people I was truly comfortable sharing that part of myself with. I got somewhat more popular in my later high school years when I lost weight and the girls from the year under took an interest in me. I wasn’t athletically gifted enough to be one of the cool kids but not socially awkward enough to be targeted for bullying. I suspect those who didn’t get to know in my later years in high school would class me as OK but mildly annoying.

I got through High School pretty much unscathed but would have zero interest in attending a reunion. I kept in touch with the people I wanted to keep in touch with.

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Wishing-Winter@reddit

Unpopular and bullied like shit to the point I started thinking about bad stuff especially when I was essentially blamed by my head of year for "not saying anything sooner"

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Tough_Witness9023@reddit

I was popular with most people, maybe a few of the boys I was chasing after were a bit scared of me

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PeteWales1965@reddit

Scared of you ? Were you chasing them with a stick ?

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chinpunkanpun@reddit

Oh, I have no doubt that very, very few people would remember me! And that's OK.

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veryoddnames1989@reddit

Fat, funny, escaped the bullies. Self-deprecating humour and grew up with the ‘popular’ crowd from my little town. Best of both really… apart from the obesity and depression etc.

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Dear_Grape_666@reddit

Hella unpopular.

I was kind of a bitch, weird, autistic, didn't get along well with people. I fully understand why I was disliked. Luckily as an adult I like to think I've grown a lot.

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fastestturtleno2@reddit

Unknown, I took loads of time off school due to problems at home and severe eczema. Now when I do see someone from school I recognise them and they don't recognise me 😂😭

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GingerNinja793@reddit

I wouldn't say I was popular. I had a small group of friends who I would play video games with most nights. But I was also able to generally chat enough with most groups, even the ones that wouldn't get on with each other (like the emos and the chavs)

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Screaming_lambs@reddit

I was very introverted probably a bit weird, bullied etc when I left school at 16 I was suddenly cool (at art college) and got attention from boys, which I found very odd.

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Morazma@reddit

I was pretty popular. Top set everything, a founding member of the school's "emo/alternative" crew, good friends with a decent amount of the sporty kids even if I wasn't one myself.

I was cool for a nerd. I think that got me respect from all sorts of groups.

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SamVimesBootTheory@reddit

Honestly, I don't really think popularity was a be all and end all thing when I was in school.

But I did struggle to fit in and got bullied/generally left out a lot for basically most of my time in school. So I think I probably was somewhat unpopular

I think sadly I was just the kid with the most 'bully target' characterisitics, I was bad at sport, well behaved, teachers generally liked me, I was very sensitive and stupidly shy, wore glasses, was tall and heavy, and generally just awkward and a bit out of touch with what was 'cool' (I was diagnosed as dyspraxic in early childhood and then got the 'oops turns out you're AuDHD' thing a couple of years ago)

With my secondary school that was even more impressive as it was a school with around 100 kids (from nursery up to 6th form, was a very small private church school that ran on Accelerated Christian Education) and I STILL managed to not fit in. I think another factor for that was the school and church I attended was in another town so a lot of the kids at my school lived in that area and were additionally involved in the church youth groups and sunday school which I didn't attend.

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Flying_worms@reddit

I was always unpopular. Years 7-9 I was bullied quite horrendously, I guess I was just an easy target because I was quiet and never grassed. Teachers were useless anyway.

By year 10 I became part of the alternative music scene and made a few friends who were also into that music so I had a little crew. We saw ourselves as too cool for petty school dynamics. Bullies never really got a reaction out of me after I found my confidence through that scene so just left me to it after that. Plus some of the people I was friends with were really feisty despite being different.

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StreamLikeDrug@reddit

I was bullied and not very popular for in Year 7 and Year 8 at school, then something weird happened and I became one of the most popular boys for Year 9, 10 & 11.

I'm also incredibly tall, so when I started that was seen as a "difference", but then I think by Year 9 everyone grew up and actually got to know me. I also became friends with two of the most popular girls in school towards the end of year 8, so that probably helped too.

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ScottishThistle19@reddit

I went to Annan Academy between 1991 and 1996, and I was deeply unpopular due to being mercilessly bullied all the time. I was ostracised and bullied to the point I considered suicide, teachers were utterly useless (one of them, Mr Mallon, was one of those who delighted in giving me a hard time). I thus had no friends and was terribly lonely. Needless to say I have no fond memories of that horrible school at all, I try to forget about it as best as I can.

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drippydrop69@reddit

different school but me too

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TheClosetedCurtain@reddit

So sorry to hear that from both of you :[

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CraftyTadpole2488@reddit

I’m so sorry that this was your high school life 😔 hope you’re doing much much better in life now

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BlackJackKetchum@reddit

Sorry about that. You are here now, so you triumphed.

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Jaded-Choice9203@reddit

That sounds awkward but totally relatable. How big school felt back then and how small it seems now. People’s memories fade, nothing personal. At least she was friendly about it. Moments like that just remind us how much life moves on.

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Polz34@reddit

Hmm bit of all I think! haha. I was a bit of a rebel and had 5 best friends, we were all girls and 3 of us would be the regular hosts of house parties, so think that made us a bit popular. However, we weren't the bully girls that was another group of 6/7 girls, we were pretty normal intelligence and popularity wise.

I will say I moved away at 18 and came back to my home town at 25 and started working at the biggest company in my town at 29 years and quite a few people from school remembered me and I had no idea who they were... So not sure what that says. I do also have quite a unique name so I was the only one with this name in my school which might have helped?

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katie-kaboom@reddit

I changed high schools four times. School 1: vastly unpopular, a common target of bullying (holdover from earlier years). School 2: totally unknown as a new kid in a big urban school; school 3: found the drama kids, wouldn't say I was popular but I had a crowd; School 4: had a brief burst of popularity as I came in with all the signs of a 90s cool girl (grunge aesthetic, coloured hair streaks, annoying vegetarian) before disappearing within a year after completing early. So the full experience I guess.

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CamThrowaway3@reddit

How did you ‘complete school early’ in the UK?

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katie-kaboom@reddit

Not everyone who lives in the UK went to school here.

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CamThrowaway3@reddit

OP is asking for opinions from people who did go to school here I think!

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philelope@reddit

school? Completed it mate.

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Cunthbert@reddit

Going to sound cringe but it depends on what as you class as popular. I got on with basically everyone, but didn’t hang around with the traditionally “popular” people because I didn’t like how they acted and treated others when together (on their own most were ok). I was at a party and someone said to me “you’re the true popular guy Cunthbert as everyone likes you, nobody likes the popular people”

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IBreakScales@reddit

I was. My main friendship group called me the squad floater. Cool with the people that thought they were all that, cool with the lames, cool with the nerds, I'm an only child, I just wanted the friendship lol

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Jarn-Templar@reddit

Grouped up with other misfits. Was mostly fine. I think people feel like the cliques are a bigger deal at the time.

We had several people that the school liked more than others. I won the cross country running and long distance running in Athletics every year and was looked over every year for the teams to represent the school because I didn't fit the boys aesthetic. In year 11, the rugby team captain brought it up after I beat them by more than 2 full minutes and the response was "well look at him." I had long hair, by year 11, it was waste length. 20 years ago apparently this was still a big no no to the older generation of teachers.

I wasnt madly popular but I wasn't unknown.

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WashExcellent3266@reddit

I was friends with everyone, the footy players, the geeks, the bullies etc, but not popular either. I just ‘was’

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Zenafa@reddit

What I'm learning from this thread is that most of the popular people don't seem to have realised they were popular even all these years later.

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BeanOnAJourney@reddit

In primary school I was so popular that the teachers, for a laugh, arranged all the tables in a giant circle with me in the middle and everybody else around the outside so that everybody could sit next next to me with no falling out. I left that school and moved to another school when we moved house, I was still quite popular there too but not as popular, i found it difficult to make friends with people i hadn't known since i was born, which was the case with most people at my first school. At secondary school I think it depends who you asked - my friends loved me, some people hated me, and the rest just had no idea I even existed.

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zephyrthewonderdog@reddit

To Op. If your wife had introduced you as CEO of x company, or someone else who could possibly help her client. I guarantee she would have remembered you, and be sat reminiscing about your school day and how you were actually best friends.

Been there, no idea I was apparently so popular at school. I thought I was just furniture. Apparently not, weird that.

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unbelievablydull82@reddit

Hated, or ignored lol. Back in the 90s, my year in secondary school the gangs were divided by colour, the white kids hated me, so bullied me, and I ended up stabbed in the eye, whilst the black kids didn't like me, but didn't see the point in wasting effort by bullying me, they had better stuff to do, until the stabbing in the eye incident, when one of the kids who ignored me chased the stabber and beat the living hell out of him.

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seven_green_toes@reddit

Thats awaful, did you lose your eye or sight?

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unbelievablydull82@reddit

Thankfully not, I was lucky that he used a sharpened piece of wood, instead of a blade. However, I couldn't open my eyelid for two weeks, and it left a bit of damage, but not enough to leave me with any sight issues. It was a month before GCSEs started too, although my attitude towards school did more damage to my exams than the injury.

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CarpetGripperRod@reddit

I'm back in my home town after years away, and am more likely to be recognized than for me to recognize someone else. This amuses my missus, who thinks I must have been super popular, but I wasn't.

Played on the rugby and cricket teams (so insta-friends there), and basically in the lower sets for every subject until I somehow, amazingly, did well enough in GCSE's to stay on to do A-Levels... which meant I had now to try and make friends with the nerdy academic kids as my sports bros all went off to work.

Nod to GCSEs! It would not have been possible for such an about-turn in my school fortunes in the days of O-Level and CSE banding.

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DelBoyAndRoddersz@reddit

Year 7-9 I was I'd say not very popular. It was a rough school in Romford and I was known for playing rugby and fighting, and I was deeply unhappy. Then at 14 I moved to Lowestoft, and had the opportunity to completely reinvent myself. Started playing music, got into drama, and performed in all the musicals. Became friends with everybody and anybody, ended up getting nominated for prom king. It was the happiest time of my life.

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phetea@reddit

Nah, always had a small click though. Skaters and metal heads due to my interests then the crossover that happened with everyone who smoked being in a friends group. Kept a few friends past school but as of now ( early 30's ) my best friends are my kids lol.

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Alucard_uk@reddit

I had a couple of close friends but other than that I was pretty much ignored.

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HoneyFlavouredRain@reddit

Mostly unknown. Only picked on if the nerds and unpopular kids weren't around

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vajaxle@reddit

Ooh good question! I was not in a popular group and got bullied but I had some pals and got stoned on breaks. I thought I was pretty nondescript but after moving away and coming back folks knew me. That was brand new information. I must've had an impact haha

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Evening_Cup_3319@reddit

Quite interesting that the vast majority of responses here arr that people were unpopular/bullied.

I was popular. Not universally liked as I have always been pretty outspoken and people mistake my assuredness for arrogance, but I was definitely someone most people perceived as 'cool', for whatever reason(s).

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_abstrusus@reddit

What really counts as 'popular'?

I think a lot of people would remember me because I was one of a tiny handful of kids into extreme metal and had long hair.

I had a fairly big group of friends and, unlike the 'cool kids', we collectively got on with pretty much everyone asides the total dickheads.

That, to me, seems like a truer popularity than being part of some sort of pseudo 'elite' which is disliked and/or not viewed as being particularly 'cool' by many.

Certainly seems to be a sign that you'll do better as an adult.

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disappointedinitall@reddit

Randomly selected for ostracism fairly early on.

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bananabastard@reddit

In the 90s, I was a boy with long ginger hair past my shoulders, since like 11 years old. Therefore, everyone in school knew who I was. In year 8 I got a lot of taunts, ginger taunts, hippie taunts, probably every day for the entirety of year 8. But no physical bullying ever. People just shouted things from afar, or in passing. It died down and eventually stopped in year 9. The boys doing that taunting were always the weak and stupid ones. You can eventually make them feel weak and stupid.

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Resident_Pay4310@reddit

I was once told by a classmate that I was a nerd by association.

I sat with the nerds because some of them had been my friends in primary school and there were only 6 from my primary school in the grade of 150 kids.

I was smart and like fantasy books, but honestly the same could be said of the popular kids in my grade. It was an academically strong school so you had to be smart as well as attractive and charismatic to be popular.

I was friendly with most kids in my grade, and got invited to the big parties when they started happening.

In grade 11 I had a falling out with my nerd friends (a girl I considered a good friend started a hate campaign against me because she liked a guy who liked me. I didn't even like him!) and I ended up sitting with the popular kids after that. I never became super close with them though. Probably because I withdrew into myself after losing all my close friends at once.

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InevitableFox81194@reddit

So it turned out I was far more popular in school than I thought.

It was only when I went to our leavers ball with the most popular boy that it sunk in.. To be fair, he was my best friend.

I was NOT the most popular girl by far, but I was in the "most popular group"

I was just a social butterfly and a closet nerd, so I would flit between many friendship groups.

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TheProfessionalEjit@reddit

Had a little group of friends, not well known outside of it but very popular with a group of (very) physical bullies.

I left that school after 2 years but the damage was done.

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Runaroundheadless@reddit

For me I ( and my brother) went to 3 different primary schools in different towns as my father improved his career. First day was always fine until we walk home. There will always be a fight. It is like a job. A job always done with a parent freak out at the blood. You’d think they’d get used to it. Ha ha. Win or lose does not matter. So no bullying after that.

My own boys are and were appraised of the same philosophy. What’s worse? Pain or fear? Their choice.

They’ve said as adults that that that even in modern working life the same rules apply but the pain or fear analogy has different definitions of both pain and fear. Pain wins every time .

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UniqueEnigma121@reddit

Very popular. As I always had cigarettes & it wouldn’t take more than a girl sitting on my lap, to give her one😂

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Moppo_@reddit

Relatively unknown. Not really bullied, the one consistent "bully" was more like a regular annoyance than someone to fear. Like "Oh, you've stolen my ruler and tried to eat it again? FFS".

I've never been good at initiating conversation, I pretty much never saw anyone out of school in comprehensive. It wasn't until college I actually hung out with people off campus.

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cluckitanchuckit@reddit

Don't really remember tbh, probably a bit of an inbetweener, spent too much time chasing one lass that played all my mates against each other, prepubescent hormones and low self-esteem tore through us like a tornado.

Fuck you Courtney.

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Conscious-Resist-662@reddit

Op I want to tell my story haha because is a flip side I found recently.

About a decade ago I was working in a office and my manager was talking to a girl who was in my form all though school I talked to a bit but not Uber friends but sat same tables in subjects had a friend date here, met her a few years after school she dated a person who lived by me. And I was with my gf at the time and said hi.

I may as well been wall paper the way she looked at me. She had no clue who I was. There was a person in another part the area barely in interacted with same year different form and in our school we had 4 forms and they split two forms on different classes so I never had a class with knew me straight away.

My manager said because had to ask her clear something that the company ****Ed up and we had been told pay everyone if they ask but had to clear some levels. Anyway she said hey Chris this is I said her name before her I know hi and needed get the job done.

Later my manager was girl name was a bit taken back/weirded out I can't remember that you knew her considering she works somewhere totally different. I said well I went school for 5 years with her.....

Last month I met someone from a year above but knew very well by name and id been walking past him ignoring him years. He looked so different and it wasn't until a mutual person told me who he was when we all ran into each other I was crap and he's like yeah I was trying let on to you when we passed each other......

Also since school I was a mix of all at times btw but a certain thing made people know me sadly. Nothing I did but anyway the amount of people I've met since school and my oldest friend and me are guilty of this btw who ask about people and one of us don't remember until someone says something or are mixing people up etc.

We all are piecing things together more people I meet over time what happened too x oh did you hear.

It's not you mate so much as getting older memories different for everyone and changes and we also look different to others than ourselves. Haha so I feel your pain a bit I've had a few same moments and more same as yours I'll be honest where they like no idea who you are.....

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Conscious-Resist-662@reddit

It's like a mix of cludo and guess who the more I meet the few school people I do we pass on information and it's dod he have red hair, and we guess a school mate and then find out information.

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Last-Objective-8356@reddit

I was quite popular in secondary school, was a full on npc in sixth form though😭

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BarberSoggy540@reddit

Was anyone else getting invited to parties and had an active life but they weren’t popular

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chiefgareth@reddit

I think I was at the bottom of the top. I was friends with some of the people at the top, but a lot of the time felt more comfortable with the people at the bottom, but I wasn’t one of them and didn’t want to be.

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stan_the-man007@reddit

I hate to be that guy, who seems like he clinging onto high school popularity. But I was the typical colt popular guy, class clown, and got lucky with the girls. I was once upon a time attractive but got fat. Moreover I tuned into a drug addict and ended up in rehab after school and didn’t achieve anything. So yeah I live up to the stereotype. 🤣

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Arschgeige96@reddit

Started off extremely unpopular and got bullied quite a lot.

Made friends with the right person and bullying slowed down to just a few twats who were like that with lots of people.

Never was completely popular but had a lot more “normal” friends towards the end and people treated me a lot better

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TickTackTonia@reddit

I left school 25 years ago and I genuinely don't remember popular/unpopular being a concept back then!!

You had the loud kids who had a lot of friends and the ones who kept to themselves.

But the loud kids with a lot of friends... would I by default call them 'popular', nope! Because half of them were assholes! 😂

This whole concept was brought in by Americans and I hate it. I feel sorry for kids having to go to school and deal with that level of utter shite on top of everything else nowadays.

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holdingtea@reddit

I was thinking this too. There wasn't a specific divide like how it's portrayed In the US. We had lots of groups (but most people would all intermingled) and some of those groups were more known or popular but that didn't translate into them being an envy or anything. Or that they got to do things others couldn't.

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trippykitsy@reddit

i was infamous. i was a naruto

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sandsanta@reddit

Didn’t go to school in UK but was quite popular. Was quite athletic. Represented the school in futsal and basketball. Tug of war captain 3 years in a row which we won first place each year. Decent academics. I was chill but respectful with everyone in school honestly. My academics were decent, scoring As and Bs for my GCSE. Made a few life long friends as well.

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IReallyLoveNifflers@reddit

Uhh, somewhere between unpopular and unknown. I was bullied a lot and had no friends.

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Relative-Tea3944@reddit

How many people were in your year? Seems bizarre to me that you could not know someone in your grade, had forgotten about maybe but I definitely knew the names of everyone I went to school with.

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holdingtea@reddit

Not the op but I think their were like 300/400 people in my year (which seemed about the same as most other schools around), split into 3 sets with about 4/5 classrooms in a set. I vaguely remember most people but I'd say their were still a bunch of people you basically never came into contact with.

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Willing_Coconut4364@reddit

I played in all the sports teams and I'm a huge dork. So everyone knew me and I had friends across the entire school. I had a great time. My geeky friends and a great time too.

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Reasonable-Cat5767@reddit

I didn't have the option of being unknown because I made some fairly huge life choices whilst in secondary school that didn't allow going under the radar. However, I was also rather studious but alternative so people generally ignored me anyway. I hovered between groups but didn't make any meaningful connections which worked well I guess.

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West-Ad-1532@reddit

I was very good at all sports and fighting so that offset my parents turning to JWs whilst I was in junior of which I got stick for.... Plus national health glasses didn't help...... Neither did being small or having curly hair... I always wanted straight hair like everyone else ..

I had a big group of friends but only a few close friends.... I sat with a group of girls in some lessons but was clueless and sat red and flushed.... However I did snog a very popular girl on the back of the bus on the last trip in junior school...

The sports teacher was great, always encouraging...

People remember me or know me from school and my life after school....

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Hardie1247@reddit

I had a pretty big group of friends, though honestly looking back on it I really don't know if I would have called them true friends - the only real thing I'd say we had in common was living nearby to each other, We'd known each other from the age of about 8 up until 17, and when we all went off to Uni I just lost contact with every single one of them, and didn't really make any friends at Uni either lol.

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Gingy2210@reddit

I'm female and had undiagnosed autism and ADHD. I was weird, had uncommon/uncool interests (classical music, crochet, making my own clothes). I was largely ignored or bullied making me unpopular and an unknown. It wasn't until years later I really thought about it and realised I was the weird one in my class. But with age I've accepted it. I'm still uncool but I'm still me.

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Simple-Appearance-59@reddit

Or they were the basic ones. ;-)

Then undiagnosed ADHDer here - I feel yah. Thankfully my diagnosed daughter has found similar friends and, touch wood, seems to be doing much better at secondary than primary.

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RipCurl69Reddit@reddit

but I'm still me.

And that is the coolest thing you could possibly say, own it 🫶

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PastorParcel@reddit

I was pretty much friendless and bullied, by some of the teachers too. Fortunately, one of the teachers let me lock myself in the art room each lunchtime, and to stay after school most days to avoid the bullies.

I was off 'sick' a lot. I was a good student, but got middling GCSEs as I missed so much school.

Hated every minute of school.

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ijs_1985@reddit

Played in multiple sports teams, top set without ever working / studying, played in a band, had the freedom to go out etc

School was a fucking breeze for me but 90s into early 00s were terrible for bullying - some kids lives were made hell and there was some proper nasty kids about

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BalasaarNelxaan@reddit

I was an inbetweener. I was clever but not top set clever, I played for various sports teams but never the first teams. I had a small close knit circle of friends who were into the same nerdy shit I was into, but I wasn’t disliked by the popular kids (with a few exceptions.)

Given that I got very few votes from both the teachers and the pupils I guess I probably just went under the radar.

TBH though I’m ok with that. I’m still friends with the guys from school though we don’t see each other that often, and because I wasn’t a school superstar I don’t feel like I’ve gone downhill.

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Penfold3@reddit

This is similar to me. Some intermediate sets, some top sets. Knew a lot of people however sat in the ‘outskirts’ of a lot of the groups. Had a couple of friendship groups. Played sports but wasn’t first pick (but wasn’t that bothered) - just happy to train most of the time.

Don’t regularly keep in touch with many I went to school with. I’ve been out and about and seen people I went to school with. My fav one is my SIL had organised a family trip to see my brother in Hairspray at a local theatre last year. Kept passing someone I went to school with - she didn’t even bat an eye lid. She was even stood behind me in the queue for the bar during the interval. Turned around and looked her straight in the eye and nothing (we’d been friends at school). A couple of weeks later I got a request off her on social media.

Just thought if you can’t remember me when I’m stood in front if you……no access to my social media 🤣

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Ashamed_North348@reddit

I’ve been a hairdresser since I left school, I retiree this year at 66 so that’s 50 years, I remember people from forever, a lot of them don’t know me, it can be annoying to say the least!

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jitsujoe134@reddit

I have this too, I can remember people I met once for like 30 seconds about 5 years ago, can be kind of awkward. There's a term "super recogniser" which describes it fairly well, I assume there's levels to it but I definitely have it to some extent!

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Ashamed_North348@reddit

Really? I’ve got that!

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Low-Local-442@reddit

lol, It's wild how some people just forget, right? At least you’ve got great hair stories to share with your clients.

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terrorbagoly@reddit

I was the leader of the weirdos and outcasts. Top of my year in most subjects so I got a pass from teachers for being a rebellious baby goth and going up against bullies all the time. Dated some very handsome guys so the popular girls hated me even more if that was even possible. Hung out with art and music students a lot, but I was also very athletic, while also attending extra science classes in the afternoon. Success gave me enough confidence to be a complete PITA for those trying to get a grip on me, while being a goth/nerd/geek gave me the empathy needed to not become a bully myself.

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ukpunjabivixen@reddit

Quiet but popular. Good at netball, one of only 4 brown girls in my year, and pretty ok at academic stuff. Mixed school, used to wear glasses.

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DoingItWellBitch@reddit

Unpopular from year 7 - 8

Popular from year 9 - onwards

A friend took pity on me and started helping me change my image. Changed my hairstyle and looked more feminine.

The boys started noticing me. The popular girls started becoming friends with me.

I binned off everyone who wasn't friends with me when I was unpopular, as soon as I left school.

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Arkonias@reddit

I was a ghost, loner, socially awkward. School wasn't a happy place.

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Andika421@reddit

I was unpopular with kids outside of my class and quite popular with my classmates

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Fun_Sized_6432@reddit

I was bang in the middle, never bullied but really only spoke to the friends in my group. Two funny things stand out for me after leaving school: 1. While I was at uni, I had a part time job in a local supermarket, along with a lot of people I’d been to school with. I remember talking to one of them on a lunch break and she said “To be honest, you never spoke in school, I’ve only recently found out you’ve got a Scottish accent!” 2. Working at the same supermarket, I was quite friendly with a girl who was the same age as me, but who had gone to a different school. I found out she was dating someone who I had gone to school with but didn’t really know. One time I bumped into both of them together and said hi to him, but he was really stand-offish with me. I didn’t really think anything of it, but a few days later the girl told me she had had a go at her boyfriend, and apparently he was really embarrassed talking to me because he had bullied me at school and felt bad. The thing was - he hadn’t. That’s how memorable I was. He thought I was someone completely different.

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IndividualCurious322@reddit

Bullied relentlessly.

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InkedDoll1@reddit

Unpopular. I had a bad limp (hip dysplasia) and no interest in makeup or hairstyles. I carried around a biography of jimi hendrix (this was 1990/91). I did get bullied a bit but nothing very severe, thankfully. I was extremely glad to leave.

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RaspberryJammm@reddit

Everyone knew who I was and I'd get bullied for being the weird kid, even by people three years older than me who I didn't know. It wasn't just a few people bullying me it was dozens and some of the teachers. Undiagnosed neurodivergent. Bullied at home too by siblings. Fortunately I was popular in sports and hobbies groups outside of school or I wouldn't still be here. Deeply traumatised but think I've processed it by now.

But I can't even go into the town where I went to school without having a panic attack.

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AliceMorgon@reddit

I was very well known in my school - if you mentioned my name, everyone knew who I was - but I was not popular. I was one of a close-knit group of weirdos who snuck off to the nearby university over lunch to hang out with the students and smoke weed and talk about Nietzsche.

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jahambo@reddit

Middle of the pack to be honest. Got on with everyone, but kept to my own group. I don’t know who I would pick as the popular people though, it seemed more like everyone stuck to their own while getting on with most. Some poor kids got tormented, but I never had the social capital (or physical capital) to stop it really. I would say don’t be a cunt when it was happening but if it didn’t stop there wasn’t a whole lot I could do.

I still remember the fat kid changing after PE inside the shower cubical and some wee bam would always jump over and switched it on to soak his clothes. Poor guy, hope he is doing well.

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ox1973@reddit

One of the smartest kids in the school which would normally mean bullied to oblivion but also very good at sports (rugby, football, track) and hard as nails (TaeKwonDo black belt). I was not popular per se, but I was known.

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Otherwise_Trash7499@reddit

Very unpopular, didn’t have friends until yr 9. I was the weird kid who didn’t have clean clothes or clean hair and didn’t really talk a lot. Was bullied a fair bit in the earlier years.

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DampFlange@reddit

I had a foot in every camp.

I was good at sport, so fitted in with that crowd.

I was smart, but lazy and argumentative, so could roll with the nerds but also the scrotes.

I started DJing at 14 and was a budding football hooligan, so got respect and disdain in equal measure.

I have several lifelong friends who go back to those days and they said I was either the best company, or the worst company with nothing in between, so being diagnosed with bipolar in middle age explained a lot.

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Holymolybalony@reddit

Bullied by kids, ignored by the teachers. I get pure anxiety about bumping into anyone from either primary or secondary school. Therapist is making a killing off me though. But I wouldn’t change any of it because i am so happy with who I am now and the really winners are those that are happy like me.

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littleduckcake@reddit

Unpopular. Everyone thought I was weird because I pissed myself in year 7. And also because I was generally weird.

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Zero_Zonee0@reddit

Definitely unpopular. I was bullied really bad, never really had any real friends, and was known as the weird kid who was 'obsessed' with wolves.

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Mr__Skeet@reddit

I was relatively popular as I was the class clown/practical joker type, perpetual underachiever, coasted on natural ability and was quite the attention-seeker, always prioritising school as a social occasion/opportunity to do things to try and impress girls or friends.

It was all relatively harmless (apart from academically) until about 14/15 when my social group took a more sinister turn. Two got permanently expelled for bringing weed/mushrooms into school, and fighting became much more common.

Thankfully, I had other friends to shift closer to, but it took until about age 17 to permanently detach from the sinister mob. I’m hugely relieved I did as I managed to scrape some A Levels together and I really turned myself around over the next few years- a pivotal time for me looking back 15+ years on.

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PKblaze@reddit

Unpopular and unknown

Bullied in one school, moved to another and just went under the radar.

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Bazzlekry@reddit

Top in all the classes (except PE), spots, greasy hair and bottle top glasses. Always had my nose in a book. I think everyone that knew me hated me. If you didn’t hate me, you had no idea who I was. Also undiagnosed autistic, although it was the80s and nobody was diagnosed then. I loved the learning part of school, hated the social side, and to this day can’t understand why anyone would like me.

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FrivolousMilkshake@reddit

'... and to this day can't understand why anyone would like me.'

Ah, that winded me. I'm sorry to read that. I hope you're doing okay.

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Bazzlekry@reddit

Thanks, I’m ok. Got a small but close group of friends and I’ve learned to just go with it now.

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HexaDecio@reddit

I don’t really fit into any of these. I always kind of saw myself as a grey man. I kept out of the big groups, had a small circle which has served me well to this day, and had an overall fantastic and enjoyable time at school. I was lucky in my year, there wasn’t much bullying across the board.

I don’t have any identifiable social media anymore, and haven’t for several years, so no idea what people are up to these days.

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No-Daikon3645@reddit

Pretty much unknown. I was in the school orchestra, awkward and shy, and had the same 3 friends throughout the 5 years.

I loved school, though, and didn't care that I was just a face.

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BananaHomunculus@reddit

Mostly invisible, mild bullying here and there, nothing too crazy - I did what I could to stay home from school.

I imagine that not many people would remember me.

I became a little more memorable at age 15 when I decided to steal a load of booze and hang out with some other dudes and girls who wanted booze as well. It formed a weekly occurrence that lasted until I was 18. When I was 18 I got bored of drinking, it lost its flavour, the legality tainted it and I just wanted to chill so ended up smoking copious amounts of marijuana - it scratched the itch of softcore anarchy and it gave me a social encore.

Marijuana gave me something - a curiosity I didn't have before, the ability to concentrate on menial tasks - I was able to persevere in university because of it. I miss it terribly but it started making me intensely paranoid. Didn't make a single friend in uni though.

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Commercial_Nature_28@reddit

Cool to the nerds, but uncool amongst the cool kids. An inbetweener really

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CranberryPuffCake@reddit

I came out at school.

Everyone knew who I was because no one was really out at the time. Even younger kids knew who I was, as older boys warned them about me... classic homophobes.

Anyway, was I popular? No but infamous I suppose.

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Jacks_Journey@reddit

I was extremely lucky that I never got bullied and was popular at school.

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messedup73@reddit

I moved to a new school second year of senior in a new town.I was bullied by the girls in our top set but started smoking in the third year and hung out with a whole bunch of misfits started bunking off , drinking etc.It helped me start fighting back the other girls still spread rumors about me but I went to so many parties had fun plus most of my boyfriends had left school.Could have done better academically but in the mid to late 80,s I was grateful to the bunch who made my school life bearable.

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louilondon@reddit

I get this the other way round people say hi we went to school together I ain’t got a clue who they are but they start asking how my brothers and sister are

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Insertnameherebois@reddit

Deeply unpopular due to people finding out my mother was sectioned and spreading rumours about me

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Routine_Ad1823@reddit

I was reasonably popular until about Year 9 when I got into a fight with a popular kid and gave him a nosebleed.

The thing is -

He started it!

and 2. I'm absolutely not a fighter, at all, so it was all laughable. I barely tapped him but his nose started bleeding and then all the popular girls were acting like I beat the shit out of him.

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Mr06506@reddit

Ha I was mildly unpopular until I accidentally knocked out a wildly unpopular boy and then I was like a saint for a few weeks at least.

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RipCurl69Reddit@reddit

Well known, but I wouldn't say I was popular or even unpopular. I just kinda did my own thing, hung out with the people I did, and was amicable to the ones I didn't. I'd actively avoid trying to start shit, which lead to some thinking I was an easy pick. But after I ended up in a fight with a kid most people didn't like where I caught him in the neck with a pen, most of them learned to just leave me alone. Some even tried sucking up to me and I was like dude, I'm not about that. Just be chill and I'll be your friend, lol

Was the target of a fair few shitheads back in the earlier years of secondary but I think we'd all collectively mellowed out by the time our final year came around. There are lads who I used to get into punchups with that I run into somewhat regularly around town and I can't say I hold any hatred towards them. Even the pen dude is doing his own carpentry work and I've seen him around a few times

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MaleficentSwan0223@reddit

I was an unknown. I also had a late glow up so am unrecognisable to how I looked at school.

My husband was very popular. He gets stopped by people in the street still now and a lot of times has no idea who they are.

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Which_Performance_72@reddit

People mostly liked me, I got on with people and didn't upset anyone. No one was ever rude to me really, god knows why with all things considered.

I was very hard to bully, a combination of being very relaxed, thick skinned and had drug dealer cousins.

I wasn't popular and never tried to be, I sort of just existed most of the time with a small group of friends

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DoctorWhofan789eywim@reddit

Definitely not popular. I can't even claim to be unpopular, because that implied kids gave enough of a shit about me to give me trouble. I just went to school. Had a couple of mates. Had an OK time. I think that's the experience of most people.

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ilovecats_49201@reddit

I only went to primary school but yeah… I felt pretty invisible. Irrelevant. Not bullied just not really wanted either, despite my efforts. I’m autistic (undiagnosed at that point) and I struggled to form connections. Feeling reciprocated when interacting felt like gold dust.

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Lienidus1@reddit

Had a rough time at high school, an all boys school and I was a late developer with a big mouth but some of the coolest kids liked me. But I was rejuvenated at university by being able to reinvent myself and was well in with the cool crowd. The confidence stayed with me and I haven't looked back since.

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PushingDaises13@reddit

Unpopular and bullied a bit. Had some drama and there were periods I didn’t have any friends. It affected me a lot at the time but from 18+ I started to get more confident in myself and by mid 20s I’d consider myself quite popular/ good at making friends.

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Horrorgeek66@reddit

I knew a lot of people. Had a few friends. Was relentlessly bullied in primary school and high school. Just before my GCSE’s I got the absolute shit kicked out of me. Horrific. Awful time.

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MetallicBaka@reddit

Mostly unknown, unpopular with some, popular with a few. Fewer than a dozen real friends at any one time.

I was intelligent but lazy af. Never did homework, dodged sports and didn't seek to join groups of kids. The fact that I always emerged unscathed in tests and exams (more by luck than anything else) pissed some people off.

Teachers didn't like me, except English teachers. Maths and science teachers particularly disliked me. Maths because I was crap at everything except geometry and trigonometry, and science teachers because I was good at it despite doing next to no schoolwork.

Mostly I just minded my own business and school was civil enough to largely do the same and just wait for me to leave.

Most of my working life has been as a writer of one sort or another. The one English teacher I met after leaving school said she'd have bet on me ending up doing that, and she'd have been surprised if I'd had success at any other kind of work. I wasn't sure if that was more a positive or negative assessment.

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Afraid-Astronomer886@reddit

Somewhere in between. I had a close group of friends and I was on ok terms with most people.

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w3stw0rld@reddit

I was the classic double agent. Played on the rugby and football teams, but you’d just as likely find me at chess club, guitar club or choir/show practice at lunch times. Never really knew if I was popular or not but had loads of mates and somehow ended up at more socials and parties than most. Eventually twigged that the 'popular lot' weren’t quite as popular as they thought as they weren't even aware of the parties they weren’t invited to.

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TehDragonGuy@reddit

Mine was weird. Unpopular, definitely. I was the smart kid, a bit of a smart arse, fat and socially awkward. Relentlessly bullied by certain popular kids that has still left its scars on me to this day. But then I got on with some of the other popular kids quite well, even some that were good friends with the nasty ones. Not on a close friend basis, but I'd play Xbox with them after school sometimes and things like that. It was a weird dynamic.

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keerin@reddit

Known but not popular. Had a small group of friends.

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martyrees76@reddit

Unknown, a trait which has followed me far into adulthood

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AccomplishedRice7427@reddit

I suspect no one, other than a couple of friends I'm still in contact with remember who I am.

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Impossible-Curve6277@reddit

none of the above. I was the chameleon and I suggest this is probably the best tactic. I work in sales and this strategy works equally as well. Years ago a bully had a go at me.. I didn't hold back, I went mental on him..fucker stayed away for good, and his mates. Be unpredictable and wankers but kind to everyone else

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Historical_Stress_64@reddit

My home teacher wrote every year in my report book, '(My name) remains the most friendly and well-regarded student in his year by both his clasmates and his teachers.' I didn't think that was the case but, I never had any arguments, fall-outs, disagreements with anyone throughout all my school years.

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QSBW97@reddit

I'll be honest, on reddit I think you're likely to find a lot more people who got bullied than kids that were the football captain.

I didn't turn up often, and dropped out fully in year 10. I got on with people well enough when I did go in, although I was pretty small, so I got targeted by the years above.

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random_username_96@reddit

Known (but not super popular) within my year, but it was a small school so kinda hard to not know everyone. Wouldn't be known to the years above or below.

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gggggenegenie@reddit

Top set for most things, relatively poor and, looking back, probably undiagnosed autistic. I was not popular or unpopular, but probably more ridiculed than unknown.

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springsomnia@reddit

I was the school outcast. I was a nerdy autistic kid so was seen as easy pickings for the other kids.

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AdRealistic4984@reddit

I was really lucky to be surrounded by empathetic and deeply normal children in my school years. However, I was laboured with several teachers who were bullies

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DescriptionFuture851@reddit

Avarage.

I was friends with the nerds and the cool kids. However, I mostly stuck with my core friend group, as I still do now as an adult.

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ComedySquad@reddit

I recently bumped into someone I went to school with but haven't seen since I left over 20 years ago, they remembered me after a few seconds which is pretty much where I expected to be on the memory scale

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spacetimebear@reddit

Not popular enough to be top dog but popular enough with the popular crowd that I guess most people would remember me? But I've never been to a school reunion and live nearly 300 miles away from school so I'll never see anyone there again anyway.

It's funny though. I could still name many of the popular AND unpopular kids, but there are so many middle of the road people that I honestly wouldn't know them.

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Rooatno8@reddit

I was told that everyone liked me, probably knew my name, had no enemies, teachers liked me. I was very academic, good at sports, in lots of teams, got along with everyone, but never had a group of really close friends. It was weird. A popular 'outlier' that did not fit into any particular group.

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ReflectionChemical71@reddit

I was known. People were aware of me. Some were positive to me, some negative. I disregarded the negative ones and kept in touch with the positives. 20+ years later I am still comminicate with people I want to see and they are the same. We have Whatsapp groups, we have annual events, we all meet up and have fun.

I also have a freaky memory. Few years back the group I still meet went to a pub for mates wettting the babbies head day. Ended at some pub and also there was a couple who went to same school as us.

They were going "Hey, remember you, remember you... don't remember you tho ReflectionChenical71..." "I dont remember you either. Ah well, thats life."

This was a lie.

I remember the year you joined our school after your parents changed locations, I remember the classes we shared, I remember the group you hang around with in our classes. I remember you took AS-Level classes in the sixth form.

As for your partner, I remember the year they also joined the school after their parents moved location - that the reason you're together? Shared experience of having to relocate and make friends with a new bunch of teenagers? - I remember what group they hang around with, I remember they did not attend sixth form at our school. If pushed I can name the classes you both shared with me. Hell I can draw up the classroom layout and who sat where, and I'd make a pretty good job of naming every person....

...BUT....

As with most things it was easier to just shrug amd go with the flow.

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Overthinker-dreamer@reddit

Completely unknown.

I had a small group of friends. I wasn't too clever but worked hard. Never involved in school gossip.

I guess most people have forgotten about me.

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h00dman@reddit

Throughout my school years I was all three, luckily ending on a high as popular.

I say luckily, the unpopular years were horrible, I'm just trying to look for the positives.

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Unstableavo@reddit

Turns out having undiagnosed autism till your 30 explains alot of the reasons why I never felt like I fitted in at school, never had a large friendship group like I desperately wanted. I was just above lowest set, the music and drama guy. If someone did see me now 15 years laterI don't think they would even know my name. But I remember them.

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CraftyTadpole2488@reddit

Not me but a family friend, his wife when they first met was telling him that they were in the same class at school and he couldn’t remember her at all

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1968Bladerunner@reddit

We moved here just in time to start high school, so didn't have the history of primary school friendships to fall back on, & also lived out in the countryside (with no car, only bikes) which limited making many friends outside school.

So a virtual unknown non-sporty loner type, who hung with other non-sporty loner types, making a few friends through shared interests - home computers & music mostly.

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cgknight1@reddit

There were 45 people in my year - difficult to be unknown...

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BlackJackKetchum@reddit

Depends a bit on your school. My Alma mater had two form entry, so yeah, I know the name of every fellow in my year - can’t say I’d recognise all of them in the street tho’.

Anyway, my place thirded into lads, science nerds and artsy types. I was academically top of the latter, but socially middle/bottom of it.

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Nine_Eye_Ron@reddit

Represented school in multiple sports, leaders program, near the top of top set.

I don’t think most people knew who I was, had a few friends but generally kept quiet.

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CourtneyLush@reddit

I was neither popular or unpopular. I was just there, had a group of friends who probably remember me but I shouldn't think, outside of that, anyone else would. I left school 30 something years ago and I can't remember everyone I went to school with.

Weirdly I do talk, occasionally, to one of the super popular lads, he remembered me but, I think it's because I had a distinctive surname which he took the piss out of.

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buy_me_a_pint@reddit

I was unknown and unpopular because of having DCD otherwise Dyspraxia

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Sylvester88@reddit

Quite popular. There were only 3 black kids in my year so we were cool by default. At least 2 of us were in every top set, and at least 2 of us were in most sports teams (basketball, football, athletics)

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penguin62@reddit

Some friends but most people didn't know me and some picked on me. Not a great time in my life and still dealing with insecurity.

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keepthebear@reddit

I was probably invisible, I hope I was anyway. I was a miserable teenager. I probably wouldn't remember many people from school either, and they wouldn't remember me.

I had friends, like a group of about five of us, I wasn't bullied or anything, but I was very quiet. I moved country over ten years ago so I'm unlikely to bump into anyone.

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Bounty_drillah@reddit

Bit of both to be fair, luckily I was considered funny. There were a few kids who had it in for me but also I fell in with the skater/stoner kids and was considered cool.

I deffo looked goofy, babyfaced until year 9 though. Then I hit puberty, filled out and it was all good.

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jeffcarpthefisheater@reddit

Inneed some clarity as to when you got the tattoo

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Bounty_drillah@reddit

Year 11 so I would've been 15 going on 16.

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FScrotFitzgerald@reddit

Unpopular in my own year group. I generally hated them and they generally hated me.

Pretty popular with every other year group. I hung out with the senior cricket team, so I had friends in a wider range of year groups than most people.

I am generally never "completely unknown" anywhere I go. My partner calls me "the mayor of everywhere". It is a blurse.

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-FangMcFrost-@reddit

I was quite well known but for the wrong reasons.

I was known as "the quiet boy" at high school and I was forever getting bullied at school because I was "different" and an easy target and I had a very small group of friends who were all "geeks" (I guess you could say).

These days, whenever I come across someone I knew from high school, I can tell that they know who I am by the way they stare at me but they never approach me to have a chat, which is fine by me.

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Junior_Tradition7958@reddit

An inbetweener

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Conscious_Analysis98@reddit

The Inbetweeners

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jeffcarpthefisheater@reddit

I was a less twatty version of them. Insided morenthe embarrassing end. Not that no one knew me, or that everyone hated me, I was just there.

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No-Jackfruit6571@reddit

Middle ranking but moved my way up via ever Morse popular gfs to the top.

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Expression-Little@reddit

Everyone knew who I was because I was the only goth kid in the entire school, but I had a total of about two friends and was pretty severely bullied. If I met someone from school now I don't know if they'd recognise me now I have a natural hair colour and wear "normal" clothes for a 30-something. The only hint might be that I'm heavily tattooed?

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theotherquantumjim@reddit

Smart. Annoying. Definitely unpopular

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Emergency_nap_needed@reddit

I was badly bullied and left school at 13. Things got pretty dark for me. I rebuilt my life and only reconnected with a few people 20+ years later. Most of them didn't realise how badly I was struggling at school and were shocked to hear that I had a breakdown.

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Soggy_Detective_4737@reddit

Top set, but no idea on how to present myself. Undiagnosed Autism and ADHD.

I wasn't in the popular groups, but the friends I had were good friends. I've had a few people recognise me when I visit my old home town from all sectors.

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takeagamble@reddit

I still live in my home town so I see people I recognise from school, but there are some I have no recollection of their name at all.

I would assume they're similar to me.

I guess it depends on how big your school is, mine had 8 forms in each year, each with like 30 kids

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BillyJoeDubuluw@reddit

I was a bit like marmite, actually 😂

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breaded_skateboard@reddit

Sticky?

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BillyJoeDubuluw@reddit

And a bit of an acquired taste 😆

Had plenty of friends actually, but was about as blasé about being barred from the leaving dance as I was when it came to the big reunion and I was busy.

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Turneroff@reddit

At yeast you had friends to extract you from solitude.

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TomatoAlarming245@reddit

My school was really small. We had a ‘popular’ group but they were mainly just mean people. By year ten, we all sort of ignored them, and by which point my friendship group grew bigger because we were just nice people.

I was quite popular at school, but only because my year group were a fairly nice bunch, and everyone just sort of got along. I was also part of the athletics club and performed with a few people because I sang. I knew a lot of people but it was all very surface level, and I don’t speak to anyone from school at all.

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Major-Feed5214@reddit

Unpopular.

Everyone knew who I was, but nobody bar my twin sister knew me deeply as a person.

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Mrs_Mulligan2019@reddit

Maybe because at parties you played video games instead of joining in.

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TomatoAlarming245@reddit

Our year group was super small, so by year ten the ‘popular’ kids (who were really just mean) were sort of ostracised and nobody paid them much attention. By which point, my main friendship group just expanded because we were nice people and liked good music. I never felt unpopular, which was quite nice, I was friends with a lot of people, but it was quite surface level. I don’t speak to a single person from school now though!

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Dangerous-Pair7826@reddit

Middling really, mixed with the cool kids on their fringe was quite lucky with the ladies too but, school wasnt for me far more adventure out on the streets of GB so I baled at the end of 3rd year and went on Urban Safari…..z sheesh did I get myself in some predicaments ha, still alive at 56 so all good

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Celery_Worried@reddit

Very unpopular. Cleverest kid in the school by a large margin. Great at music and awful at PE. Probably undiagnosed autistic.

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Routine_Ad1823@reddit

Hard to see why you were unpopular.

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brutal_and_beautiful@reddit

Insanely unpopular.

I had no real friends only people who I was seen with, most students bullied me and even the teachers had a problem with me.

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Away-Activity-469@reddit

Non of the above. Even then, I hated the idea of being popular, and the nature of those that considered themselves so. I won fights against the rough kids which may have gained me a reputation I never chose, but I wasn't a mis-fit. And because I had older brothers who were considered cool, I wasn't unknown either.

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AngryBadgerThrowaway@reddit

I think I was mostly unknown. I had a few friends but didn’t have any interest in wider socialising. No sports teams or extra curriculars.

It cuts both ways, though. If I were to encounter someone with whom I went to school, there is a VERY small chance I’d remember them at all no matter how popular they were back in the day

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Eddie_F_17@reddit

Known and people were nice, but not popular

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ashyjay@reddit

Surprisingly I went from completely unknown relying on my brothers school mates, to having like 3 different friend groups by the time I got to sixth form, I fucked up and stuck to the group who pretty much recreated Skins every weekend.

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Independent_Olive373@reddit

I got lucky that I was in Manchester in the early 90s in sixth form. Tons of people simply stick on a pair of flairs and a hooded top and we all went to clubs in the city centre together. Barriers broke down and no one gave a fuck whether you were cool or not.

Having said that I am guessing there were loads of people that hated the whole scene and hated all of us.

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Ilike3subredditsonly@reddit

i was bullied for the first year of secondary, clinged to a few groups. 2nd year all the popular girls in my class were nice to me, spent free time alone, now i have my friend group, the popular girls are still nice to me

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Jaraathe@reddit

I wouldn’t say popular, but I wasn’t unpopular. I didn’t think I was unknown, but I once hooked up with someone who was friends with someone who was in most of my classes (about 14 years after we’d left school), and the friend had no idea who I was, so I have also been humbled in the way you describe. Totally weird. Makes you feel like a fraud. Thankfully, my friends backed me up that I was who I said I was.

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Deep_Banana_6521@reddit

I was the weird kid who was also friends with popular kids.

I was fat, ginger, wore glasses and socially awkward, so I got bullied pretty badly when I started high school, but when I hit puberty at like 13-14, I grew to 6 foot and became a brick shit house, and had a bad temper, so the bullies who didn't want to get smacked in the face shut up.

Then I got into playing musical instruments, so I got into the music nerd group, and was in top set maths, english and science, so got in with the nerd-nerd group. Then I started smoking, so I got in with the bad kids, then started smoking weed and got in with the really bad kids(I think the willingness to smack somebody in the face and being massive helped here too).

People either hated me or really liked me, and people who didn't know me thought I was a weirdo, but I held a bit of influence, so I got some respect, which was ok!

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vegan_voorhees@reddit

Camp short kid with a lisp, overbearing religious parents, and a mild physical disability: it was hell.

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ra246@reddit

I'd say just sort of in the middle, going towards an unknown. I have a decent career now that a lot of people knew was the plan when I was in High School, so maybe that's a defining factor, and played football for the school team and local team with a lot of people.

That said, even now in life, I feel that my memory for people is higher than my ability to be memorable, if that makes sense..?

On a scale of 1-10, I might be a 4/10 for memorable, but I'm a 6 or 7/10 for remembering people, so I don't take offence when I recognise people who don't remember me.

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ClarifyingMe@reddit

I was the weird one that was too unknown to bully and those that tried gave up swiftly. Their friends would be civil with me (walk home to school together in early years, be invited to their home while walking home but not friends who do things together).

I was good at getting good grades and I was also highly athletic, taking part and winning in our borough games and our internal sports days. I just didn't conform so that didn't make me very popular in any group. I was a drifter for a bit and then settled with a group of people who were least judgemental for the remainder years.

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TimboJimbo81@reddit

I’m going to a wedding next week, same situation.

Will rethink my approach and let you know haha!

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