Feels like I'm slowly becoming irrelevant, and I'm too tired to keep up
Posted by SleepyReepies@reddit | sysadmin | View on Reddit | 127 comments
IDK if I'm looking for advice, or just some empathy from internet strangers, but I feel totally lost right now.
I have a CISSP, CCNA, and a few other less important certificates. Currently working on the AWS CAA as well. On top of that, I feel like my responsibilities have grown tremendously as my boss has left and I absorbed some of his work.
And despite all my work effort, I still feel like I am not competitive enough. My work is awful and I need a new job (we were recently acquired by a big company), but when I look at the job postings, I feel completely inadequate for everything.
I took a course on programming and I passed with flying colors, but I definitely don't know how to code. I updated some ansible scripts and set up a playbook once, but I wouldn't call myself adequate in that space either. I see a bunch of problems that make me feel almost quite literally unhireable and I don't know how to fix it.
I've heard the advice to set up a homelab, experiment with all this random technology, etc etc, and even if I do it once, I still don't feel like it's something I can put on my resume, and since it's usually just a one-and-done, Great, I've set up a pihole. Great, I ran some docker scripts and now my Plex server is working. Great, I set up a simple network in AWS and have two EC2 servers talking together. I don't gain the expertise to actually become knowledgeable on the subject.
And honestly, I'm just tired. I just want to go home at 5PM and not think about work anymore.
Texkonc@reddit
I used to have a home lab and spent time learning, but in the last few years I would rather touch anything when I get home. Just a basic gaming router, no mesh or anything. Been in industry since late 2008 perfesionally but working with computers since 94.
BeTheSquish@reddit
It sounds like you are capable, but also burned out. It's hard to have an accurate perspective when you're tired like that. Try to take a step back from things and re-assess with a clear mind. Get more rest, and/or change things up a bit in your routines. And don't forget that imposter syndrome is a real deal as well. Gather outside perspectives on your accomplishments to get out of your own head about what your work is like. This may help you frame things differently, and/or boost confidence levels.
feelingoodwednesday@reddit
100% when I'm at the end of my rope and burnout, my confidence like OPs is down the tube. We are all highly capable technologists, but the world moves so fast, and we often wonder if our skills are still applicable, which is normal.
I might rapidly learn something, complete the project with a high degree of succes, and 6 months later completely forget all about it. Then when you interview its like you dont know a thing at all. We just have to remember our world can move so fast that its completely normal to have to go back and refresh information, especially before an interview, and recall how and why we had success instead of constantly pushing on to the next project.
STUNTPENlS@reddit
About 30 years ago I was having a discussion with a buddy of mine who was talking about all this new Microsoft tech he was learning. I remember saying to him "yeah, in another 2-3 years they'll come out with something entirely new and you'll have to learn it all over again. I want to become a vet, animal anatomy doesn't change every few years".
That's pretty much the way things have been for the past 30 years. I've been working in the industry for just shy of half a century, since I was 18 years old. I started out on old minicomputers (Microvaxes, System 36's etc), moved into IBM big-iron, and eventually into PC Windows/Linux/networking world. Today I principally manage Linux HPCs. I did VB/Winforms programming for a long time, moved into C#/Webforms,
But if I'm honest, if I look at today's job postings, I am completely unqualified for everything. If I did manage to land something (fat chance at my age with the amount of ageism in IT) I'd have to take a huge pay cut. Thankfully I'm a few years away from retirement with my 80% defined-benefit government pension.
The only way you could possibly stay "relevant" with actual job experience (not just homelab stuff) is to work for an MSP where you are constantly exposed to different things based on the client environments.
A couple of years ago I remember people saying Powershell was the hottest thing. Is it even relevant today? Today its ansible and terraform. Who knows what it will be next year.
A typical business environment isn't going to be on the bleeding edge of technology constantly. It isn't viable. A business needs IT systems to accomplish a business function. Once they have a system in place that meets those needs, its going to go into maintenance and get upgrades/etc. but no significant changes to the environment unless a new business need presents itself.
The larger the company, the more business needs will present themselves. You have a better chance of getting more exposure to diverse technologies the larger the company you work for. But obviously those opportunities are less. Hence, an MSP offers the ability to get exposed to a wide range of tech at numerous business.
I wouldn't say I am burnt out. But like OP, I'm exhausted by it at this point.
Known_Experience_794@reddit
I’m right there with you on just about all of it. Minus the pension. I too am… tired…. And probably a bit burnt out as well. And you are so right about all the “new” technologies. Over the years (and early on really) this pattern of everyone getting all a buzz about the latest thing… until the next latest thing. I quickly got to the point where I ignored most of those technologies and as predicted, they came and went. And being silo’d in a small business with no budget or care for more than a decade my skill set is not “up to date” anymore. But I do run a fairly sizable homelab and I’m sure some of that stuff might peak the interest of some employers, if we ever got far enough in the process to talk about it. And the whole ageist industry thing, yeah that’s very real. TBH, I am terrified of the next 5-10 years for me and people like us.
STUNTPENlS@reddit
I did COBOL programming back in the 80's on IBM big iron. I'm thinking I could take a refresher and go back to it. I hear COBOL consultants are in big demand in some circles :)
Known_Experience_794@reddit
I've heard this as well. Seems most of the Cobol programmers are dieing off and some companies simply can't get rid of those systems. I "touched" Cobol back in the late 80's but never really wrote any of it. But yeah I would be willing to venture that is someone was even half way decent at it, companies would pay big money for that at this point. You just need to find them.
Team503@reddit
Homelabs aren't usually a resume thing, they're an interview thing. A few years ago, when interviewing for a role that used a decent amount of Terraform, I was asked if I had any experience with it. I just replied "Professionally? No. I use it in my homelab, so I'm familiar with the basics, but it's something I'm sure I'll have to come up to speed on."
Did that help? No idea. But I got the job. And the thing about homelabs is that maintaining them is where you learn. It's not the setting up, usually, though that's some nice exposure to new tech, it's when it breaks and you have to fix it so Mammy can watch her Father Ted that you really learn. And as you expand its capabilities, you learn how to make things work together. And you have to upgrade, so you learn about upgrading VMware or Windows or Linux in a semi-prod environment, you learn about downtime, and so on.
As for the rest, yeah, I feel ya. I stopped even trying for certs years ago, they just don't matter much unless you're trying to be an SME. And SME isn't a bad target. My current role has me doing almost entirely automation in Powershell, with my architecture on the side, because I'm the only one on the team with any POSH knowledge and the team has a lot of automation needs and they aren't willing to buy commercial tools to do those tasks. It's been kinda fun, and even though I'm getting kinda pigeonholed as "the POSH/automation guy", I don't mind. I'm happy to sit here and do this until I retire.
When I log off at 5pm, I'm done. I don't think about work at all anymore. I used to, and when I moved from the States to Ireland, I recalibrated my sense of normal (thankfully the Irish have a very different view of "acceptable productivity" than Americans do). I no longer rush, I don't try to cram everything in. I get done what I can get done, and it takes however long it takes. Occasionally for a deadline I'll push, but most of the time, I'm on moderate-effort mode because that's still more productive than most of the people I work with LOL. Makes me look good without making them look bad.
Also, man, if you can, take a vacation, like a long one. At least two weeks away from work makes a big difference in allowing your brain to reset and shed those years/decades of stress you've accumulated. Americans take WAY too little vacation, IMO.
HappyDadOfFourJesus@reddit
Give yourself time to NOT think about IT.
I go fishing with my boys without my phone. I go to the gym, lift heavy, and move blood. My wife and I go out for coffee. I cut down trees on the weekend. I bicycle. I volunteer at local nonprofits.
Before I started doing all this, I felt the burnout. This is what worked for me.
Rambles_Off_Topics@reddit
We IT guys need physical "wins". We can build the greatest system, tons of servers, etc... but that's all digital wins, and generally nobody but IT see's those as "wins". You need to go home and build something, or have a physical hobby. You need to do something, and it needs to produce something physical...anything. Like you I often fish. A "win" is getting a bite for me, not even catching a fish - it's still fun. I ride a lot of motocross, sometimes try for a big jump that I didn't do last week - another win. I think I might start a book or something as I've helped out a lot of guys. They know they need something else but aren't quite sure what it is. It's wins man, we all need positive things in our lives.
SaltyComputer3733@reddit
100%. IT girl here, 15 years in and I hit full burnout last year. Totally feel you on the need for physical wins. Mine ended up being this....sticking a ton of tiny sparkly dots on a canvas. Weirdly chill, weirdly addictive. Glass of wine, true crime podcast and I'm good.
Known_Experience_794@reddit
I feel you. My wife, we she senses things are getting to be too much for me for too long, she will show up with a coloring book and a bunch of crayons. Believe it or not, something so simple does help my mind take a legit break.
SaltyComputer3733@reddit
This is so true. Love coloring books to. Especially the easy ones where you don't sweat over the tiny details. It evaporates any stress.
Warrlock608@reddit
I call this analog hobbies and they have saved me from losing my mind.
I play disc golf, darts, pool, and I like to hike. All screens go away, it is just me in a physical environment enjoying life. I highly suggest picking one up, bonus points you get to make friends along the way!
SaltyComputer3733@reddit
Diamond painting saved my life, lol! It's a cruel world out there.
thvnderfvck@reddit
I like this. I play beer league softball and even catching a routine fly in right field can scratch that itch.
Over_Helicopter_5183@reddit
I collect whiskies during the week and drinks them during the weekends. My IT guy hobby.
OiMouseboy@reddit
I play disc golf and getting a ace or even a drop in birdie scratches it for me.
alias454@reddit
I starting fixing old vehicles. Still gives me a sense of accomplishment but since I have more than one I can pick and choose what gets "worked" on. There are days I just go sit on a stool in the shop and think about stuff without ever picking up a wrench.
JudasRose@reddit
I got tired just from reading that. I should probably do some of that more physical stuff.
Nydus87@reddit
Total side note, but any fishing tips for someone who completely sucks at it? I've been wanting to get better at it, but I haven't caught a damn thing in the last decade, so I've relegated myself to "dude who gets firewood and drinks beer with the people who can catch fish."
Rambles_Off_Topics@reddit
What are you fishing for, and where? I can almost guarantee that you will catch a fish using a small hook and work in most bodies of water. If going for bass, a wacky or Texas rig worm will get bites if they are there. I do mainly shore fishing but catch pike and bass quite often. Nothing so far I’ve used has beat a senko, wacky or weightless texas rigged. Also spin baits.
Nydus87@reddit
Southwest USA, and fishing for whatever is in streams and little rivers. Trout I think is what people fish for around here?
Rambles_Off_Topics@reddit
Yea, it can never hurt to use a worm/hook/bobber. Bobber fishing is usually pretty consistent, but I don't like casting and waiting. Although I also recommend to get the app Fishbrain or Fishangler and see if people are posting their catches nearby (and what they are using). Also walk up to guys you see fishing and ask them. Most people I've ran into are pretty good about talking about it. You'll get an old guy every now and then that won't tell you anything and brush you off. It takes awhile but keep fishing and you'll figure it out. There are still days that I don't catch anything, however you can't catch them if you aren't out there. Mornings/nights are good time during the summer.
Nydus87@reddit
I really, really appreciate the tips and tricks. I'm going to give it a shot again before the warm weather heads out!
alias454@reddit
They call it fishing and not catching for a reason. ;)
Automatic_Beat_1446@reddit
thats part of fishing
if you'd like to increase your odds a little:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y42qgkBf6s4
HappyDadOfFourJesus@reddit
I said I go fishing. I did not say I catch fish.
For me, it's time with my boys and watching them bait their hooks and catch fish. They're young, so they're baiting with worms and catching sunnies by the shore.
thebigbread42@reddit
This helped me too. Got into treadmill running, a pickleball league every week, and my GF and I try to dine out somewhere new every weekend. We also try to squeeze in a short road trip every 3-4 months as a mini vacation.
TwinkleTwinkie@reddit
Just imagine you coming home from a hard day at work and cutting down one of your neighbors trees as a stress relief.
HappyDadOfFourJesus@reddit
I have plenty of my own trees, but so do they. :)
TheJesusGuy@reddit
Do you live in a forest
SlopingGiraffe@reddit
He used to
HappyDadOfFourJesus@reddit
If the definition of "forest" is "50x trees versus houses", then yes.
TheJesusGuy@reddit
Literal millionaire
HappyDadOfFourJesus@reddit
Also, is your username stalking my username?
OiMouseboy@reddit
I have about 10 trees in my yard that all grow very fast. there is always a tree that needs to be trimmed.
Low-Okra7931@reddit
If you don't love it, and most people don't love it, this work/life balance is a hard requirement to actually getting good at this IMO.
Landscape4737@reddit
I did this for the last 20 years. Then when my youngest child turned 18 I quit. I do all sorts of jobs now, love the variety. If is frustrating seeing the younger IT generation getting vendor locked in.
Salt-n-Pepper-War@reddit
This is actually really good advice. One of the things that helps keep me sane is kayaking. I haven't been able to do that lately but I have been able to do cycling and it helps as well. Going to enjoy music or a museum or just hang out with friends periodically really makes a big difference and how I feel overall about work.
mrstang01@reddit
Just turned 59, and I walked out of a good paying IT job two years ago because my Boss was a jerk, didn't know anything about IT, and had the gall to come in my office and yell at me (was wrong about what he was yelling about too, funniest part). I'm sick of the do more with less, that is, until something you've spit and bailing wired together for years finally breaks because of something new, or they won't let you get spares, and then somehow it's your fault. Despite all the emails and meetings you've done to try to bring it to management's attention... Now trying to get back in, and I can't get much more than a Zoom meeting, or first interview. Definitely Ageism at work, but what do you do?
Fatality@reddit
Best way to learn is to do it
samstone_@reddit
Yeah, burnt out man. Time for a new job. Just get out there and interview, it can be fun…even exhilarating.
Nikosfra06@reddit
Feeling a lot like you, with a lot of responsibilities as a cto, feeling less and less adequate even if according to many I'm doing a good job.
Feeling in technical debt for not being up to the latest trends, and feeling exhausted to have to study, assess and deploy technologies that will be deprecated next year...
Trying to cut off after work with gardening like many, bust doesn't seem to help much too
xxtoni@reddit
I have stopped worrying about this because everything is just bullshit.
I felt so much imposter syndrome until I realized it's all just a bunch of crap.
The cloud is just a bit lie. AWS (badly mind you) cobbled together some services and calls it the cloud so they can sell it as something proprietary.
AI is glorified autocomplete.
The hype is a lie, it's just layers and layers of abstraction. Everything runs like shit because there are 20 layers of abstraction.
I think businesses that actually run the world aren't changing technologies every week, that stuff needs to run and to run reliably. A business that changes their code tools every year doesn't seem stable.
Appropriate_Row_8104@reddit
A business that changes its tools year in and year out is setting money on fire for no good reason.
eat-the-cookiez@reddit
It’s a lie that pays very well.
Appropriate_Row_8104@reddit
A customer asked their account rep who asked me to help them reset their root password because they changed it and forgot it on their deployment.
Its called Imposter Syndrome, and it happens to the best of us.
k7eric@reddit
A jack of all trades isn't going to survive in the evolving job market over the next few years. You really need to pick an area, specialize and get the experience and certs to become at least better than Jr level. You have a CISSP (which is the premier cybersecurity cert and essentially a guarantee of pages of $150k jobs) and a CCNA but also working on programming and AWS? Are these from boot camps and paper certs? Because these are expensive and involved and you should be sailing along nicely with them. What about actual OS levels? Microsoft, Unix, Apple? You have a CCNA but have you actually worked with and setup Cisco? DNA, Intersight?
Without knowing more I think you need to find your niche and concentrate on it. Either way I don't see a future of going home at 5p and not thinking about work again until the next morning. IT exists like that at entry level and high level management but in-between is constant study, updates, CEs, call time and extended hours. And yes, you get all the empathy. IT is great but it also sucks. Even worse when it's a solo or small shop and you don't have clear leadership, goals or mentors. I think most of us have been there.
raffey_goode@reddit
you realistically need both. we have someone who is "in school for cybersecurity" and while they know some stuff, they barely know how windows works. I don't know how you can perform any security without understanding how the OS you're securing works. JOAT will have valuable experience some specialized people will not know, but their area of expertise is phenomenal. If anything, the JOAT is valuable as in-house IT because they will know a vast majority about the environment, culture, network, etc. The specialist will be most valuable as a vendor/specialized service contractor. They will kill it in their area and many places would benefit from contracting out or hiring their labor.
k7eric@reddit
I think the real issue is most of us start out as the JOAT but after a certain amount of time you can’t stay that way…and advance. There are plenty of places that would love to have a JOAT with 10-15 years of experience. But realistically that’s no different than what he has now. And he will keep the lack of advancement and lower salary along with it.
redvelvet92@reddit
Jack of all trades is actually required in the current landscape. People want people to plumb systems and figure it, no more mastering one thing. Well except for software engineering principles, or just engineering.
k7eric@reddit
Jack of all trades the way you’re describing it yes. But not I’ve touched everything but not confident in anything. A Jack of all trades is a Windows (or Unix) admin that can use powershell, setup a switch, buy desktops, setup a network print server, setup some VMs and admin a basic domain along with security and a couple relevant certs for all of that. How he described his current experience is exactly how about half of the guys I last interviewed described their experience. They didn’t make it to the next round. It’s fine starting out but at the 20, or even 10 year mark, serious places with serious money are looking for professionals that know a handful of things really, really well and not “I’ve touched” a ton of things but still don’t know what I really want level.
badboybilly42582@reddit
I fully agree with this. When I started out I was a jack of all trades just like you described above and it was with a small mom and pop shop company.
One thing I noticed along the way with my career is as the infrastructure increases in size, the less the employer is interested in jack of all trades like people. They want people specialized in a specific area and have a deep understanding of it.
As far as job postings go, I've noticed most of the postings I'm seeing are for Jack of all trades type jobs. They are listing a LOT of responsibilities, like 10-15 different individual responsibilities. Most of these employers I've never heard of before so I'm assuming these are small mom and pop shops. What's depressing is the salary range they are posting.
channelgary@reddit
This is the way - specialisation
zzmorg82@reddit
I feel like it’s a double edge sword at this point.
Being a “Jack of all trades” doesn’t net you much outside of generic small companies or break/fix MSPs with meh salary, but when you specialize in a specific area and go apply for those positions; they want you to do 10 other things as well, so you end up being a JOAT anyway.
Can’t catch a break out here.
1stUserEver@reddit
Right! Jacks are going to be able to adapt anywhere, move around in a company as needed, or easily get another gig. Specialist are going to struggle IMO. Keeping up with it all is going to cause burnout though. just keep the base skills fine tuned and scheduling things out to not over do it.
No_Investigator3369@reddit
yea but the plumbers are getting burned out with being told they need to use galvanized pipe (python) all throughout the structure or its shit. No one is cool with PEX anymore and only wants it the way that they heard saw someone else do it in a niche scenario. I think this is what is burning me out.
PrepperBoi@reddit
CISSP is flooded with people with no real world experience.
Ssakaa@reddit
Jack of all trades with a security (particularly availability) mindset and comfort poking things at scale is called an SRE.
eat-the-cookiez@reddit
Needs in depth infra experience, often deep k8 skills.
Source: have been an SRE
Longjumping_Ear6405@reddit
I got the CISSP only to satisfy some DoD req for a contract, the most over hyped cert out there. The jack of all of trades with expertise on a few domains and good soft-skills will outlast the niche players. IMO.
Also, one does not need to burn the candle at both ends to stay current. You should be able to carve out learning time on the clock since they will benefit from your professional development, too.
hermslice@reddit
Going to hard disagree on the specialize comment. (Just my opinion) My last couple of jobs (I tend to move every 2-3 years) I have gotten BECAUSE I have a wide range of knowledge. Having a systems guy that knows networking, or CI/CD, or some database knowledge what has gotten me return calls. Also, I have 0 certifications.
Also, I'm not a huge fan of AI... But I don't think it's going away, so getting some experience with how to use it is likely a good idea. Github's copilot is $10/month($100/year) for the "premium". I have been using it for the last couple of projects I have worked on, and I (begrudgingly) have seen a decent return on value. It's not going to replace me, but it is definitely a net positive for me.
joedotdog@reddit
Remember, job postings are typically unicorn level wish lists.
Gainside@reddit
the truth is, most people don’t deep dive into every tech they touch; they learn enough to be effective, and lean on peers, docs, and experience over time. setting up a homelab once isn’t wasted, it’s exposure
Mysterious-Donkey474@reddit
You’re not irrelevant, you’re just burned out, and that’s a normal reaction after taking on a ton of work. That and for me... I get so stressed watching as technology changes in hyperspeed and sometimes feel like there's no way I can stay on top of it. It's a really unique time being in tech/IT - just putting it out there in case you feel alone.
The skills and certs you already have are valuable, and you don’t need to be a master programmer or homelab wiz to be employable. I say set some boundaries in your current job wherever you can, maybe take some time for yourself, and remember that real-world experience often counts more than extra credit side projects.
And also... you have such a leg up being technical in general. There are so many places in an org where this is needed and it can be incredibly hard to find good technical help. To add to that, its extremely hard to find even mid technical help but from someone who cares enough to go digging to find solutions. Thats 90% of the battle - we never have all of the answers. Maybe this crossroads is an opportunity to look at hybrid IT/security management roles, maybe even consulting, or just an area where you're more steering the boat than rowing it/coding it. I have a buddy who's a product owner, makes a shitload of money, and just works strategically and project manages - we need to make this change to the product because of X, now go do it engineers. I think about it a lot lol
MonkyDeathRocket@reddit
relatable
FaulteredReality@reddit
A good tech doesn't know everything. A good tech knows how to find answers and will apply their skills to whatever problem is in front of them.
Simmery@reddit
I don't do work stuff outside work. I found a pretty easy-going job, and I'm not planning on leaving. It doesn't pay a whole lot, but I'm fine making that tradeoff.
I do have a tech hobby outside work, which is game development. Maybe it'll turn into kind of a "soft" retirement career, or maybe it'll just stay a hobby. The thought of making a lab just to learn work stuff sounds so boring to me. I just don't care. But game development levels up my skills and it's also fun.
You know, just acting professional and confident in job interviews goes a long way, even if another candidate might look better on paper.
robstrosity@reddit
Just out of interest what are you using to develop your game?
I like the idea of making my own game. Not really to sell but more for myself and something interesting to do. But I don't really know what the best place to start is?
Simmery@reddit
I'm using Unity. The gamedev sub has some info for beginners:
https://www.reddit.com/r/gamedev/wiki/faq/#wiki_getting_started
kcbh711@reddit
What kind of games are you building? Unity seems pretty hobbyist friendly.
Simmery@reddit
A music-based game that i think fills a niche that no games have done well. If I'm right, i think I've got something. If I'm not, I'm still having fun making it.
peterpayne@reddit
As a guy who's sole reason to having bought a console as an adult was guitar hero, and who's a fan of rocksmith... thank you!
napkinthieff@reddit
You got the music portion covered?
kcbh711@reddit
That's awesome! Send us a link when you publish!
Ms3_Weeb@reddit
Sure there are outliers, but I feel like a lot of companies list everything and the kitchen sink in their job listings just to reach more search results/candidates. In reality I think while they have some nonnegotiables, a lot of it boils down to your individual desire to grow into the role. Like I may not have worked with Docker or Kubernetes in a production environment, but if I come into an interview and be transparent about that but also mention how I ordered a couple raspberry pi's and installed a control node and setup some worker nodes to run a few containers in my home I feel like that should demonstrate that you understand some basic architecture but also that you're able to add new skills to your toolbelt.
PappaFrost@reddit
There is a lot of pressure on individual IT employees to try to be an entire department. Don't fall for it. Even if you are a very capable and knowledgeable human being, you are still only one human being and that is fine.
Inconvenient33truth@reddit
There is nothing wrong w/ going home at 5pm & not thinking about work anymore…so long as the work that you are doing is acceptable to your current employer. Embrace the process of doing the work each day instead of dreaming up more hoops to jump through. Certifications & home labs are great, if they are solving actual problems that you need to overcome at work right now or tangible financial reward in the near future. But just putting time into certifications & home labs off hours b/c you think ‘you should’ can lead to burn out. Consider a pursuing a non IT related hobby which you can dive into instead & you will be surprised how more fulfilling (& focused) a hobby you look forward to each night can make your day job in IT.
loupgarou21@reddit
That all sounds like burnout man. If you can, take a week or two off. If you want to travel, travel, but if you want to stay in town and just play video games, disc golf, watch movies, whatever, do that.
Get a little time to clear your head.
Once you've relaxed a little, look at what it would take to get some better work/life balance. If you don't have one, find a hobby that you enjoy. You talked about setting up a home lab, setting up labs in AWS, getting all these certifications. If you enjoy those things and find them relaxing, great, that can be a hobby for you, but if you don't enjoy them, don't find them relaxing, find something else. Try learning an instrument, try woodworking, try warhammer 40k, or MTG, or pokemon, or kayaking, or making custom American Doll dresses or something, something you find enjoyable and relaxing.
If you want a different job, figure out what's important to you. If you want a 9-5 job, work on finding that. You might not make as much money as one where you're working 60 hours a week, but maybe you'll realize that money isn't your motivator. Hell, I passed up on a job recently where I would have been making 30% more, but I would have been working about 50% more hours.
Then, once you know what's important to you in a job, start looking for a job that fits you, and if it isn't a perfect fit for your skills, think critically about where the shortcomings are, and can you learn them.
You don't need to be an expert in AWS (or other technologies) on day 1 at most places, you just need to know enough to know how not to screw the company, and you can learn the rest over time. Most places will give you time to come up to speed.
Virtual-Cycle-353@reddit
Hey man, been there. I was 30 and near to 10 years a the same job ! I worked my ass off trying to help everyone and to be implicated in all I.T. projects, and even there, every new ticket or request makes me feel like I'm not enough. So I looked for other jobs, even the simpliest job offer maje me feel like i wasn't good enough. One day, 7AM I was working from home, I ended up completely frozen in front of my computer and those outlook notification made me feel sad, so Iwent to the kitchen and start crying cause I felt like I will never be good enough to do my job properly. So, I took 3 months off just for me. The problem was that I only had my job, no hobbies, no activities that helped me clear my mind. So, your situation is different (I love my job), but your capabilities are not the problem. Your mental health is ! My advice : find a way to make you working hour part of your day, not your day ! Example: sometimes I train before work, bring my bike at work, and then go to a ride, or as a part-time student, going to the library during lunch helps me take a break.
YOU ARE ENOUGH. One day, you will smile and chuckle about it, Take care :)
Appropriate-Border-8@reddit
Hey! Way to toot your own horn... 😉
ProjectRetrobution@reddit
Sounds like you’re burned out buddy. What fills your cup at the end of the day?
themadcap76@reddit
I used to have the same feelings while working at my old job of 18 years, after the layoff, the new place was better for me mentally and I felt useful again. Took less money, but many times it’s just the work place.
Intrepid_Pear8883@reddit
I used to worry about getting jobs until I realized half the field can barely spell their name. Seriously, if you've been on the other side of the interview table - there's a lot of talk in this field. 95% of it is bluster. Most interviewees can't even answer simple questions.
A lot of them have jobs though, so I think you're setting your standards too high.
I get the tired of keeping up part. It's exhausting.
channelgary@reddit
💯 to this. You’re probably so far in front of most you just aren’t aware of it. For me I found a niche after 25 years in IT and it’s paying really well. Find your niche, all your years of experience are worth way more than some four letter abbreviation of a certificate
ishataneja07@reddit
I get it—feeling stuck even with CISSP, CCNA, and AWS CAA can be frustrating. But believe me, you’re already ahead in terms of core technical skills. Cloud, networking, and security knowledge are huge assets. The key now is focusing on deepening your expertise in areas like automation, scripting, and cloud infrastructure management. These are the skills that’ll take you from good to great.
Focus on small wins—whether it’s tweaking a PySpark task, automating an ETL pipeline, or optimizing your AWS configurations. Each small project builds your ability to handle more complex challenges. Hands-on experience in areas like DevOps or cloud architecture will pay off.
The real game-changer is consistency. Keep refining your skills over time, and remember—data engineering, automation, and scalable cloud solutions are highly valued in today’s job market.
SPMrFantastic@reddit
I hear ya man. fwiw it sounds like you're plenty qualified just super burned out. I've been there and many have mentioned here it helps to not do anything tech or work related off the clock. You need a tech detox, easier said than done but trust me it helps shed some of that weight off your shoulders.
DigiSmackd@reddit
I'm so golden handcuffed to my current job.
I've got none of those certifications. No advanced degree. I've "kept up" with little outside of the things directly required to keep things afloat at my job.
I'd love to switch jobs and WFH. I'd take a bit of a pay cut even to do that. But there's just nothing I'm suitable for. So my dreams of moving to somewhere more rural and owning some land are all fantasy.
It's such a double-edged sword. I'm largely burnt out and uninspired. I have no passion for the field. But also I'm glad to have a job, glad to have one that lets me live my current lifestyle. I'm glad to have a job.
But also...it's not what I imagined in my younger years...
ShadowTurtle88@reddit
You gotta disconnect from work when you leave. Forget home labs and projects. If you want to upskill, take legitimate training courses with a cert.
MasterpieceGreen8890@reddit
Rest, Relax, take a leave and reorganize. Don't rush it and don't fell pressured - this might be burning you out. It will eventually come as long as your consistent. Give your mind some space, do something unproductive every now and then.
but yeah projects, homelabs and home servers can give you the boost and break things. If you can use your company resources, the better
on another thought, if you do want to learn that kind of tech. I say get start doing some interviews or casually looking related jobs. Inspect all requirements and build from there.
One step at a time, you got this buddy!
battmain@reddit
I felt like this, I had hobbies, but being so drained at and after work, I didn't want to do anything when I got home except laugh. I would endlessly scroll waiting for that one belly laugh. Then I got the call from a previous manager. New job, 30k/year raise and a 100% slower than where I was. Email went from 200+ per day (actually more if the useless alerts were counted) to maybe 10 a week. I actually have time now to research and do stuff. Not overwhelmed yet and if I play my cards right, it should not be overwhelming *if" I do things properly before it gets too big to handle.
GreenLeftPlank@reddit
Sometimes I feel like this, but then I hit the gym or run, travel with my family and mess around with a couple of gaming computers I have, hang out in my backyard and try to get some meaning out of it all.
AI is actually pretty glitchy and I don’t think it’s going to take anyone’s job soon .
1a2b3c4d_1a2b3c4d@reddit
You sound burnt out, with your career. You also sound lost, with no personal goals or direction. Don't take this the wrong way, but you sound like you could benefit from them therapy. You need to find your purpose first, before you can fix your career. You just seem so lost.
TopRedacted@reddit
Unless you're an Indian who works for 30k you don't matter.
eat-the-cookiez@reddit
Why do they matter any more than anyone else?
TopRedacted@reddit
They work cheaper.
AmiDeplorabilis@reddit
You cannot live your job 24/7... you're gonna drive yourself nuts!
Maybe you're already there... no matter. Your job IS important, but you (and, by extension, your family) AND your health are much more important.
I saw several outstanding suggestions: I agree with them. And you're not the first. The main point is to get away from work, without your phone, preferably outside, and do something completely unrelated. For me, it's physical labor... sweating, outside, accomplishing sonething, or even going fishing; just remember that the worst day fishing bears the best day working!
Essentially, the point is to change your focus away from job-related work to anything but. And the sooner you get started, the better!
whiteycnbr@reddit
Those job ads are never accurate role descriptions. They ask for a unicorn, which is rare. You're probably more capable than 98% of people, the aptitude to work something out with a bit of research is the most important thing, just be honest
fwambo42@reddit
take up brewing. not because I have any sense that it would work, but there's always that one guy who quits/gets laid off and posts a huge success story becoming an indie brewer
First-Structure-2407@reddit
Do all the homelab bros go home after work and work on their homelab? 😂
iworkinITandlikeEDM@reddit
I did for a while because I was stuck in help desks that didnt teach me anything and I'd constantly get rejected from job interviews with the only reason being "sorry but the other candidate had more experience than you."
Scurro@reddit
Wait until you get to the point where get turned down from jobs because you have too much experience.
"Sorry but you are over qualified. We want a candidate that will stick with us."
eat-the-cookiez@reddit
They do. And come into work on Monday to boast about the stuff they did. Was super toxic environment to work in
gpzj94@reddit
That's what vpn is for to do it for learning while at work... No?
Scurro@reddit
This guy homelabs
Butcher_Dave@reddit
Take it easy on yourself friend, that is much easier said than done, and so is getting up every day. I hope you have healthy support.
aequusnox@reddit
I hear you. I'm kinda in the same boat. I'm good with certain things but none of the things big corps want when hiring for over 100k/year. One of the reasons I'm happy I'm in govt.
Juls_Santana@reddit
Do you NEED more income?
Do you actually WANT to move up the ladder?
This is an ongoing topic for me because I'm trying to avoid being where you're at, but I feel like it's inevitable if I keep blindly chasing the climb up the ladder. However, technology evolves and I feel like I'm bound to be left behind if I'm not ambitious....
I often sit back after assessing things and come to the conclusion that I'm okay w/ being a T3 tech/sysadmin and not much more
ladder_filter@reddit
I'm going to pile on with everyone else and say you sound completely burned out. Time to step away for a week!
rsysadminthrowaway@reddit
Right there with you, brother. I got laid off a couple months ago and so far I've found and applied for exactly one job that feels like a good if not perfect fit. Most of the other listings I read, it's like that "uh huh, uh huh, I know some of these words" meme.
I used to have a hand in nearly everything at my last job, but gradually got siloed off into a specialty that just doesn't seem to be in high demand right now. And when it comes to upskilling with all my free time, how? Back in the good old days you could throw an old PC on your bench and spin up whatever you needed to learn at home, now it's cloud this and AI that and you have to set up remote shit and risk fucking it up and having your AWS bill accidentally run up to the goddamn stratosphere.
I've already got my whole home network infrastructure up and running in containers on Linux. Whoop de doo, in this dumpster fire of a job market, that and $10 will buy me a Big Mac meal.
And yeah, I'm tired, too. I've been throwing a few bucks a week at the Powerball in hopes that I can just leave the rat race. After three decades I'm pretty sick of having 85% of the shit I bust my ass to learn be completely worthless 12-18 months later.
zaazz55@reddit
Ever just wanted to become a post carrier?
gpzj94@reddit
Here - 1 Empathy. lol (reddit maybe needs to add that as an alternative to gold?)
In all seriousness, I don't think this feeling is too uncommon. Maybe chalk it up to imposter syndrome. Obviously, you are doing your job well and are taking on some manager/managerial duties. Maybe you're not going to jump around to all the FAANG companies and create the next life altering app - but most of us aren't. If you're happy with the job, keep at it. If you're worried what happens if they let you go some time in the future, there will be other jobs where your skills can carry over. Don't burn yourself out. Keep on doing what you're doing. Maybe don't dig your heels into keeping old tech around forever but also don't just implement Ansible at your place if it isn't right and you think you just have to do it because that's the only way you'd stay marketable. Yeah, poke around with making EC2 instances talk to each other, stay aware, but just enough to know if it's worth digging into.
If you want to do "homelab" stuff but don't want it to feel pointless or like extra work, find something that you'd want to self host instead. I'm big on the Home Assistant set ups and automating my home and I have found that it's led me to have practical reasons to use tools like cloud services, ansible, etc etc. I've been able to really grow with automation at work by thinking of automating home stuff, the logic is all there but making lights turn on with certain conditions, finding edge cases to consider, etc makes me be able to more thoughtfully think of those things ahead of time when automating stuff at work. Way more fun and more rewarding. Then I've gotten into monitoring systems stuff more with grafana, and learning about ssl certs without always feeling hopeless, and doing stuff like AWS SNS when I needed something more advanced for notifications, or starting with VMs, then moving to docker, then kubernetes as my needs and set up grew and got more complex. And I don't have to do it when I don't want to really, is the great thing. I keep my changes small enough that I can notice if I break something too bad before I cause the whole thing to go down and can't back track. Anyway, would highly recommend as it can be a great way to learn with no pressure and higher reward.
NysexBG@reddit
As the others said you are burn out. Take it slow for a little bit, doing the bare minimum for the job and do some hobbies or vacation etc... Then see what you are good at and what you enjoy and focus on it.
MicFury@reddit
I stay with my MSP because I clock out at 5 on the dot every day. The contracts define how OT works and no client of mine ever opts for it. With your creds you would probably do well in this space. Good luck.
kanzenryu@reddit
Remember that the job postings are bullshit. A bunch of wishful thinking that a unicorn will fall unto their laps.
Hungry-Lack-4778@reddit
Broski, you’re fine. Tech changes every five seconds and nobody’s out here knowing absolutely everything. You've stood up some AWS stuff, automated Ansible, knocked out some certs-that’s pretty legit. Most jobs just want someone who can figure things out, not some antisocial wizard living in a homelab 24/7. Pick something—Terraform, Python, whatever—and chip away at it when you can. It stacks up way faster than you think. But seriously, clocking out at 5PM isn’t a crime. Try and remove that from your head as best you can. Burnout kills careers faster than not knowing some random tool ever will.
S0l4n1c@reddit
I've been there… Based on what I read here, you sound more like an asset to your organization than anything else. The only advice I can give you is to focus on what you can control. It seems like you're stressed out by this acquisition from the big company. Focus on what you know and what you enjoy, and make that your career.
At the end of the day, a job is just a way to support the lifestyle you want. That’s it. If your job starts becoming a problem in your life and you can’t control what’s happening at work, then shift your focus to your life outside of it. Spend time with friends, enjoy the little moments, and don’t let this stressful situation dictate you.
Hope things get better overtime!
ncc74656m@reddit
You're burnt out. That's a tough position to be in but it is fixable - it's just important that you give yourself time and do the work to fix it. The work, btw, is resting as much as possible, finding a hobby or something you can do that gives you joy and time to think and order your thoughts about EVERYTHING ELSE. Once you finally unwind a bit and can think about it without depression, then turn your attention back to your job.
Figure out the source of your exhaustion, it may not be the obvious thing, and then what you can do to move forward. Try to compartmentalize it and take it one piece at a time.
MoonpieSonata@reddit
I relate to your sentiment fully, but also want to say the way you describe those projects prove you absolutely have the ability to do what you need to, and you will develop skills if you need them, but you absolutely have the aptitude for any of them.
Nydus87@reddit
I'm really sorry, homie. I've felt the same way a lot lately, especially when the "home lab" thing isn't really plausible any more because of all the cloud tech people are trying to implement. Chances are, you're completely cromulent at your job and all of those job postings are more "wishcasting" than "realistic."
No_Investigator3369@reddit
Personally, I think the entire IT industry is rolling like a freight train downhill into this huge ball (not literally) of splintered technical debt. We manage our own infra and tiny pieces of cloud that other depts spun up without really asking us about arch ahead of time. Its a proper shit show.
Ssakaa@reddit
How have you learned what you do feel llike you know?
So, then you have the tools in place in a situation you control. Tear into it. Peel back the layers. Find the logs. Break it. Figure out how to get back in and fix it after you find ways to identify what acually broke.
banjomin@reddit
Idk if this is the advice dude needs
Additional_Eagle4395@reddit
This right here - "And honestly, I'm just tired. I just want to go home at 5PM and not think about work anymore." Been in IT for more years that I care to admit and it can kick the shit out of you. Take time for yourself and prioritize it over your company. Once I started doing that, the burnout faded a bit. Still there and still sucks, but it is a start. IT has such a broad range of things there is no way we can stay on top of everything.
ballzsweat@reddit
Same boot, not sure how old you are but I think this is coming for a lot of us. Just tired!
MyIEKeepsCrashing@reddit
what type of role are you in? learn some automation and find a passion in freeing up your time so you can work on projects you want to work on. do a poc of whatever technologies you want to work on once you free up the time via automation and show how it can help the business and if it pans out youll get to spend time on something you enjoy. its something that works in each role ive been in. my passion is just making my day better and not doing the same thing day in and day out and automation is really the only way to accomplish that. building is fun, fixing is not.