I’m going to stay at my British girlfriend’s parents’ house for two weeks. Are there any rules I should follow?

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goingpt@reddit

Just be polite and respectful towards them. Go out of your way to say hello to them. Compliment any food that is made for you etc. Don't make a mess and if you do, clean it up. You'll be fine.

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shelleypiper@reddit

And arrive with a small, appropriate gift, eg flowers, bottle of wine, etc

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breadandbutter123456@reddit

Say thank you a lot. You can’t say thank you enough. Don’t want something, say “no thank you”.

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MonsieurGump@reddit

And remember NOT to shake hands with her father when you walk in. Handshakes are for when you leave.

When you first meet him make eye contact and gently cup his balls for 5 seconds.

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FlyPanzer56@reddit

Shake hands with her father and say “thanks for inviting me into your home daddy”

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The_Ignorant_Sapien@reddit

Best way to do this is take a shit with the toilet door open.

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Lovehat@reddit

You'll be man of the house after this.

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OutrageousRhubarb853@reddit

And point at any family photos and say “she’d get it”

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Distinct-Address3392@reddit

no, grandma on dads side, again, establish dominance

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LuDdErS68@reddit

... and don't, under any circumstances, flush.

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NuggetKing9001@reddit

Pissing directly into the centre of the water in the toilet at 3am should achieve this

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Ebialal@reddit

Open tongue kisses for the men, high fives for the women

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OriginalChapter4064@reddit

What are you on about 😂 handshakes are for greetings and goodbye

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Imaginary_Answer4493@reddit

I’m lying in bed laughing like Mutley desperately trying not to wake up husband (cat already awake and furious!) 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

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MonsieurGump@reddit

Coincidentally this advice also works to calm an annoyed husband.

(Never tried it on a cat though)

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DLH64@reddit

Oh you little b.stard. What if he believes you. 🤣

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Op please have your gf go through this advice and make sure you are clear on which suggestions are sound, and which are deadpan humour that would get you turned out into the street if taken seriously. Brits love to make daft suggestions and laugh a second time when somebody does them. It can be hilarious if harmless and consensual but cruel bullying if it leads someone with pure intentions to fuck up something important irredeemably.

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Scoobysnacks79@reddit

When you've got your girlfriend bent over the end of the bed and are punishing her chocolate starfish, it is traditional to make as much noise as possible. This lets them know that you're enjoying EVERYTHING they have to offer.

If you leave the door open they'll be even more chuffed. They might want to watch, or even join in.

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Away_Dirt_90@reddit

What? Handshake are when you leave? Never heard of this before

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Poachiesontoast@reddit

Spit on his balls if he’s scottish, pull a pube if he’s welsh, just cup if he’s English. Make sure you have warm hands

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simmyawardwinner@reddit

what about NI?

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Poachiesontoast@reddit

The Red Right Hand

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A_Right_Eejit@reddit

Put a fleg on it.

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nineJohnjohn@reddit

In it

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LuDdErS68@reddit

Cold hands in that case.

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pelvviber@reddit

...clean warm hands please chaps! We're not animals.

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summerloco@reddit

Fuck me you even had me there for a second

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Comepoopatmine1337@reddit

Eh? Ive been living a lie, defo handshake when you meet.

This is a very old school way of thinking IMO

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LegendaryTJC@reddit

This is incorrect advice in my opinion. Handshakes are very welcome as greetings, although usually initiated by the host.

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FrostingSmart8638@reddit

Whoooosh!

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glglglglgl@reddit

The advice is better when you read the second paragraph

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Significant-Key-762@reddit

This is the best advice.

Do NOT make direct eye contact with your partner's mother when addressing her. It's polite to angle your eyes down around 45 degrees from the horizontal.

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ProperComposer7949@reddit

Always always always pass comment on your gfs mums bum. Leave a silence look at dad, tell him his is better then wink at him. It is imperative that you do all of this in ear shot of your girlfriend, when she looks at you in discust, aggressively shout What? At her

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Significant-Key-762@reddit

Yeah. If you flatter her dad's bum, and he looks at you confused, it's because he's shy and/or doesn't believe you. A firm squeeze while maintaining eye contact will reassure him and his lack of confidence.

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Pure-Discipline2896@reddit

Make sure you inform them that you have kept the toilet seat warm for them.

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TheTackleZone@reddit

65 degrees if she is facing away from you.

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CrazyMike419@reddit

Its also important to apologise to any inanimate objects you bump into.

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BarNo3385@reddit

"Oh, thank you, but no thanks, thank you though," is a legitimate sentence.

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ComplexTeaBall@reddit

Two people can say sorry 4x as a convo

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AdRepulsive5278@reddit

And help where you can without being asked.

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paupaupaupaup@reddit

Great advice. I'd only add that offering to help with things, like carrying dishes to the kitchen after a family meal or wiping down the table, etc. will most certainly be seen positively. Most of the time your offer will likely be turned down, but making the offer is the key aspect.

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MoistHD@reddit

Offering to help clean up after dinner I think is always nice touch when you are a guest somewhere. 9/10 times you will get “oh goodness no, I’ll make you a tea and you can sit in the living room whilst we clear up!”, but I guarantee you will be praised as a hero after you have left.

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notThaTblondie@reddit

Dont offer, just do it. Help clear the table, help with the washing up. It needs to be done, you know ow it needs to be done so you don't need to ask if it needs to be done. Just get on with it.

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TheBestBigAl@reddit

Disagree. When people are guests in my house, I don't want them doing chores. I look at it the way my nan described it years ago:

If a guest doesn't offer to help, they're a bad guest.
If you accept their offer, you're a bad host.

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notThaTblondie@reddit

If someone is coming for dinner, id agree. Staying for 2 weeks? Pitch in a bit.

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MedsunMcr@reddit

I would see this as "I think your house is messy so I'll clean it for you" and that's an insult

My house is lived in, and that's why there's shit everywhere

Blame the kids

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No_Aspect5799@reddit

If you think a guest helping clear up plates at the end of a dinner is an insult to your home then you are simply insecure.

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MedsunMcr@reddit

Well, not quite. When someone visits, I want them to be here and relax, so I can't do enough for them. If they eat under my roof, I'm not expecting them to clean up because it was my choice to feed them as courtesy.

My comment was more satire, I don't actually think it's an insult but I do insist that they do nothing as a guest in my home.

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GetInYourBasket@reddit

I can't relax sitting doing nothing while someone else clears up after me. It feels good to help a bit, even if it's just collecting all the dishes to bring into the kitchen while someone else washes them. If someone else is clearing the table and someone is washing, can I help by drying the dishes. If everything is being covered by someone, then I'll just hang about and chat, but if I can see anything I can help with I want to be of some assistance.

It does depend on the family and what they have, if everyone helps pile their dishes together before leaving the table and they have a dish washer, there isn't really too much to help with, but putting the offer out is never going to hurt anyone.

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notThaTblondie@reddit

Im not telling him to start up the hoover and get the duster out, but dont just sit there while people clear the table and do the washing up.

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SarkyMs@reddit

Some hosts will hate you for this

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notThaTblondie@reddit

If youre staying with someone for 2 weeks you pitch in.

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MoistHD@reddit

Definitely!

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DaveDavidTom@reddit

Do not do that, ignore this guy.

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Chemical_Ad_1618@reddit

Or offer to wash up or dry dishes

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Squeak_Stormborn@reddit

This advice is great!

Below are also some great examples of British humour you can ignore.

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feetflatontheground@reddit

Most of it is above. The humour rises and drowns out any useful advice.

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pajamakitten@reddit

OP might as well get to learn our sense of humour before he arrives.

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Away_Dirt_90@reddit

Basically be respectful and act like you would anywhere else on planet earth.

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linmanfu@reddit

You're trying to help, which is lovely. But

Just be polite and respectful towards them

isn't actually good advice. It's clear that OP wants to do this. But he doesn't know how because the details can be different in different cultures. There's no "just" about it

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spynie55@reddit

Your girlfriend will know her parents better than anyone here - ask her.

Probably best just to be friendly and normal. Better to be 'that nice boy who was a bit quiet' rather than 'that weird guy who was trying too hard'

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nixtracer@reddit

Also, "sorry" always works. I think it's an English reflex. I have literally apologised to a lamppost and my front door, and that's just today.

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AlmostChristmasNow@reddit

What were you doing to the lamppost and the door that you needed to apologise for?

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FlyPanzer56@reddit

He shut the door - as for the lamppost, we don’t talk about that incident

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FlyPanzer56@reddit

Take a sloppy on the front porch, then kneel above it and pray. It’s a sign of respect

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Big_Lychee_8923@reddit

don’t swear be respectful take shoes off as soon as you go in the house

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hairymouse@reddit

Find out if the parents are watching any TV shows or listening to The Archers so you can study up on it. You’ll have something in common to talk about and probably learn some interesting things about culture.

Read Watching the English- the hidden rules of English Behaviour by Kate Fox to see an Anthropologist answer to this question.

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carrotparrotcarrot@reddit

one of my favourite books! brilliant, thoroughly recommend to everyone

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Wise_Caterpillar5881@reddit

You can read Watching the English free on archive.org: https://archive.org/download/watching-english/Watching%20English.pdf

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GraceEllis19@reddit

Oh my goodness, this looks so interesting to my little autistic brain!

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Wise_Caterpillar5881@reddit

It is a fascinating read. It's quite fun recognising bits and pieces of your own mannerisms and preferences as you read

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neilm1000@reddit

Read Watching the English- the hidden rules of English Behaviour by Kate Fox to see an Anthropologist answer to this question.

This is a brilliant recommendation.

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EthanEvenig@reddit

European etiquette about table manners is very different than asian ones. Make yourself familiar with how people behave at dinner (other meals are more laid back), as several sounds and gestures common among Asian people are considered disgusting and repulsive by typical European standards.

Also, try to blend in with the distance people keep from each other. Europeans stand to each other very closely only when they are very comfortable with each other; you might get there soon but especially initially when they barely know you if you get very close for conversations you might make them uncomfortable.

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mocha-macaron@reddit

If a meal has been made, offer to help cook or clean up afterwards.
Maybe buy them a little gift as a good gesture for having you in their home for two weeks. I doubt anyone would have an issue with an M&S voucher because the food section is great.
Ask your gf about times people wake up. Whether they love you or not, if they wake up at a certain time and you’re in the bathroom it might be a tad annoying. Try and get in there earlier than then maybe? That’s what I would do haha.
When in doubt, talk about the weather, ask about the weather etc.
Ask before using things. I’m British and my own brother would eat food that was mine without asking. So whatever you wanna use or eat, just ask.
Bring anything cool from your country. I love Korean food and I’d be so excited if someone brought me stuff from their country I can’t get here. It’s a novelty. Ask your gf if there is particular types of food they like and find a match for it at home. Any biscuits because us Brits love biscuits. Also any different types of tea.

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Decent_Confidence_36@reddit

When the tea alarm sounds make sure to stand and salute

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kpilo@reddit

You're Korean, I think you're more polite than us anyway. I'd say try to charm them with compliments or ask about childhood stuff e.g. how they were when they started their careers, got in a relationship etc

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Knightoftherealm23@reddit

Bring a welcome gift from Korea Be polite and courteous Offer to help with food and tidying up after dinner etc After you've left send flowers, as others have said if they have pets avoid any that could kill them.

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batshitnratchet@reddit

If there’s a plate of something for sharing on the table (biscuits, etc), wait to be offered one before starting to eat them. Also, if there is only one left and you want to eat it, offer it to everyone else before you do.

If you go to make a cup of tea, offer if anyone else wants one. You don’t need to do this with water, but it’s nice to do with tea/wine/beer/soda, especially if the host paid for it. If they say to help yourself then you can, just make sure you ask if anyone wants a cup/a top up when you do. Same with slices of cake etc.

Also, if you’re staying in someone’s house, it’s customary to give a small gift (flowers, bottle of wine, chocolate, etc) when you arrive. Personally, I wouldn’t offer money or groceries unless you’re asked, as that may be insulting.

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floatieweeniebeenie@reddit

Offer to wash up after dinner

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TemperatureOwn8572@reddit

In the UK its customary for the visitor to get us at 3am and start cleaning the house.

Only on a Sunday and the highest level of respect is to start with the hoover.

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Responsible_Main5926@reddit

Whatever you do put the teabag in first and the milk last. If the authorities find out you've made a cuppa or any other tea-related faux pas in any of the following ways you'll be deported to the shadow realm, punished and your property will be forfeit to the people of Dudley or Hartlepool whichever wins a coin toss.

Water, then milk, then a teabag (A guy from Skipton did this once, he's never been right since)
Use a microwave during the preparation of the tea
Disrespect Yorkshire tea
Reuse the teabag (we don't want any heroes willing to lose it all to prove a point)
Put more than 2 teaspoons of sugar in, and the Drax family will make merry at your poor decision.
Serve cold tea, a royal beefeater as the name implies will eat all beef and beef-related products in your in-laws' home
Suggest herbal tea or worse just plain hot water your in-laws may be punished for allowing you to make such a suggestion, normally the authorities will make every window in their house only open 2 inches (for non-UK people 2 inches) and all handles left-handed.

If you follow the rules and avoid these common mistakes. Your girlfriend's parents will be impressed and grateful maybe to the point where you can decide if the house is either a cup up or cup down when putting them away.

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BiscuitsAndMilk0@reddit

Respect the tea time alarm

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clocksoftime@reddit

Don't forget to take a schmoigel. Very important

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Automatic_Map_3884@reddit

bring a gift from Korea, something ediable maybe. Flowers would be nice as a goodbye thank you. Take them out for a meal near the end of your stay and pay if you can as a thank you for housing and feeding you for two weeks. Be polite treat your girlfriend nicely (should do this anyway). Enjoy your visit

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Character-Author9360@reddit

I always find getting drunk with new friends breaks the ice quite nicely. Of course this won't apply to everyone, but there is a big drinking culture in Britain. I would suggest taking a bottle of your local Korean spirit and producing it around dinner time

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kimba-the-tabby-lion@reddit

If there is anything you really don't want to eat, make sure they are aware of it. An Australian friend made roast lamb as a special treat for her Japanese house guests. I never asked how it went, but that's a very strong flavoured meat that is not popular in Japan. I've always imagine these extremely polite people trying not to show their distaste.

It's always nice to bring a gift - maybe some food or drink from your home (check the import rules, meat and dairy might not be allowed). And take them out to dinner if you can afford it - maybe even to a Korean restaurant, and you can share your knowledge. There are many in London, not sure elsewhere.

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docentmark@reddit

Lamb is strongly flavoured? Did you possibly mean mutton?

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r1Rqc1vPeF@reddit

A lot of my family don’t like lamb, never understood why. Some of them don’t like the smell of lamb cooking.

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DavidS1965@reddit

Neither does the lamb 🐑

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thechroniclesofbean@reddit

yes I don't mind it, but I have family members who refuse to eat lamb because they can't stand the taste or smell of it. They eat beef or goat instead.

It's always confused me because I honestly don't think there's a massive difference between them lol

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TheBestBigAl@reddit

To me, lamb tastes like someone added perfume to beef. Every now and then I give it another try in case my palate has changed, but I never like it.

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Bag-Weary@reddit

Beef has a more generally savoury taste whereas lamb tastes specifically of lamb.

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RisingDeadMan0@reddit

Its the smell some people dont like, didnt realise local english folk had the issue too, only two people i know are 1st gen folk

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Gingerbread_Cat@reddit

Lamb is pretty strong if you're not used to it.

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SaltyName8341@reddit

There's a few in Manchester too

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neilm1000@reddit

There's a banger in Stockport.

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SaltyName8341@reddit

What's it called?

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neilm1000@reddit

Baekdu, sort of opposite the job centre.

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SaltyName8341@reddit

Ta

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turingthecat@reddit

There’s at least one in Bristol

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silentv0ices@reddit

They are pretty common it's a great cuisine.

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swimmingswiss@reddit

Eat all the food and say its great. Even if it shit, english food is shit. You don't have to accept any offer of extra food just say no thanks i'm full.

Ask them about there job and where they come from. Don't talk about money, salaries, sex, religon or politics unless they raise it. Weather is a great topic of conversation as is how shit the trains are or how nice tea is.

They may have a British sense of humour which is basically being mean to each other. Can be quite a shock to foreigners just beware.

Always queue even when you're not sure what for or if its the right queue, just queue.

Hand shake ok for mother and father. Make sure its firm for the father.

Offer to pay for things even small things, icecream a few cakes and meal out. If they say no we'll pay you can offer again. Any more than that is awkward.

You can offer to cook 1 or 2 nights. Empty the dishwasher. Don't start hoovering or dusting that would be insulting.

You can turn up with chocolates bunch of flowers bottle of wine if they drink. Maybe something Korean if you're feeling spicey.

A few days after youve left send a small gift again flower or chocolates.

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Melodic-Tutor-2172@reddit

If there is only one bathroom make sure you let people know if you are going to shower/bathe so anyone who needs to can use the loo before you do. If you want to wash any clothes ask if you can put on a load and put some items in for them.

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Identity_Unaware@reddit

Don't fear the toilet knife. Embrace it's utility.

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swimmingswiss@reddit

When making tea or coffee ask everyone if they want one.

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whysys@reddit

Arrive with a bunch of flowers for the mum. Sunflowers are a good safe bet! Not red roses (romantic) or lilies (associated with funerals). Check with your gf if she has a favourite!

Offer to help with prep/clearing dinner - they will definitely decline at least the first day, but as you are a guest for a while, just insist at least for clear up or washing up.

After first day, offer to make teas/coffee for people when you fancy one. “Does anyone want a cuppa?/refill?”

If you sit and watch tv/movies - see if they are a household that talks over it, or sits in silence and join in as appropriate.

If there is only one bathroom, ask if anyone needs it before you have a shower/bath.

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Neat_Day_2211@reddit

I’m Asian, whatever I’ve to meet with my British boyfriend's family. I tried to be a good listener when we sat together since I didn't have anything in common to talk about. But I speak directly one-to-one.

Anything they’re prepared to do, like a meal- I asked them if I could help. So they know you’d like to help, only keep quiet due to the language barrier. Don't worry, we’re famous for respect and shy personality so they understand us :)

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cosmicharmander@reddit

I don’t think we’re too big on specific customs in the UK for this kind of thing but bringing a small gift is always nice and flowers at the end of the trip for mum to say thank you is a good idea.

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TheAlbertBrennerman@reddit

Be polite. Buy the dad some cans.

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Rare_Archer1992@reddit

Make sure to be home when the street lights turn on else out comes the mums slipper

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Dystopian_Everyday@reddit

They will ask you if you want tea. You must say yes.

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Comfortable_Star_455@reddit

Wank in every room

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Bigbesss@reddit

Remember to take your socks and underpants off when you enter and hand it to the Mother

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Vivid_Way_1125@reddit

Dont do powder off the dining room table. Note this one down, it’s really important.

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stoic_salmon@reddit

It is custom in the Uk when we greet each other to lick your partners parents faces at dinner time before you eat. It is a very weird custom and not sure why we have it but its a sign of respect. So make sure you do it

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thelovelykyle@reddit

Plenty of advice already for the parents house.

We queue in a single (not dual) line and will invite you when at the front of the queue with either words, or a palm up finger signal.

Our public toilets often cost a small fee.

It is tradition in the morning to greet each other with God Save The King (spoken, not sung).

Shops are often not 24 hour.

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KEW95@reddit

Your age will impact this, as less will be expected of a teenager than a fully-fledged adult. Assuming you’re the latter:

You’ll need to ask your girlfriend for some background info on their routine, what they like and dislike, what the sleeping arrangements will be, what they may be expecting, if they’re relaxed people or more rigid, what TV/films they watch, etc.

Bring a simple Korean gift (eg. chocolate/biscuits) and maybe buy a £10 - £15 bouquet of flowers when you arrive in England (take the price tag off of the gifts).

Offer to help clear the table, ask if anyone wants a drink if you get up to grab one from the kitchen, ask if there’s anything you can do to help, etc. They’ll usually say no, at least initially, but don’t insist. You can always ask/offer another day.

If you can afford to, ask to pay for a takeaway or take them all out for coffee once during your stay. Again, if they decline, accept and say that the offer will stand if they change their mind.

Say please and thank you when appropriate, but not excessively to the point it seems disingenuous.

Shake their hands (a hug if offered, but don’t offer one yourself) when you see them at the start and when you say goodbye at the end.

Ask them questions about themselves that show an interest, but aren’t intrusive. It’s okay to ask them to explain something if you aren’t sure what it means (not just because English isn’t your first language, but if it’s a topic you don’t know about, for example).

Use background info from your girlfriend to do a little research into what they like/dislike/watch/etc., just so you have a rough idea of it and can ask them about their hobbies and interests. You don’t need to “study”, though.

Just be yourself, try to relax and show an interest in them. Be respectful and consider how you’d want someone to treat your loved ones in the same situation. Take their/your girlfriend’s lead. You’ll be okay :)

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Comfortable-Bug1737@reddit

Use your manners and ask to help. Manners go far, and the help they'll probably say no, but the thought will be appreciated

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AccomplishedHabit125@reddit

Fuck hard, fuck loud and fuck with the door open. Assert your position as a dominant powerful prospect.

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Any_Illustrator_5457@reddit

Just be polite and respectful. Talk to them and don't be put off if they don't have a lot to say at first. Us brits aren't good at small talk 🤣

Be respectful of their home and clean up after yourself.

Be yourself they'll either like you or they won't bit no point playing a character to get them to like you.

Relax and enjoy tour time with your girlfriend I'm sure it'll all go well

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Nervous_Condition_26@reddit

Offer to help, if someone’s making dinner, doing dishes etc ask if they want a hand and be ready to help if they ask. Chances are they’ll say no but it’ll let them know you don’t expect everything to be done for you. Some people like treating their guests like royalty, some like treating them like part of the family (ie: you live here you can do it yourself).

If you’re getting up to get a drink ask if anyone else wants one.

If you smoke ask where the appropriate place to go is.

If you sit down to eat together wait until everyone has a plate before you start eating, they might say something like don’t wait, if they do then follow the others at the table, if they still wait then wait with them.

Regardless of how good or bad the food is thank the person who cooked, complement the food (just something like that was lovely thank you) unless it’s so bad you couldn’t get through it. Still thank them even if the food is bad. The thank you is for the effort, not the result.

Knock on closed doors unless you’re absolutely sure the room is empty.

Ask about knickknacks or photos prominently displayed on shelves, some of them will have a story and parents love telling stories about tat they picked up on holiday or got bought for birthdays.

If they’re doing it wrong, no they’re not. It’s their home, they’re doing it their way.

If you make a mess clean it up.

Ultimately you’ll probably be fine, any major fuckups can be put down to cultural differences as long as it doesn’t happen repeatedly.

Good luck 👍

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thatlad@reddit

If it is dark and a lamp is on, ask before switching on the ceiling light.

If Sky Sports News is on but no one is watching, do not turn it off or change the channel without asking. Just because no one is watching does not mean it shouldn't be on.

Always check there is enough toilet roll before you use the bathroom, you do not want someone to be passing toilet paper to you mid defecation.

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Bubbly_Reaction8891@reddit

If they have a dog, don't eat it

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CobblerSmall1891@reddit

Do NOT eat with your mouth open or slurp drinks or make chewing sounds. Sorry for generaling but it's better to mention it even if you don't do it.

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tallyretro@reddit

A lot of UK homes are shoes off so thats something to keep an eye out for

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tallyretro@reddit

What i'd do is bring wine, flowers, and a tastey snack from korea that they might like to try. good conversation starter i always think

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Holiday-Poet-406@reddit

Be polite, don't flush rubbers down the loo and keep the noise down after 10.

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foxytrot_forever@reddit

Don't show up empty handed. Bring a nice bottle of wine (if they drink) or flowers and a box of nice chocolate (if they don't). It will get you off on the right foot.

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disasterly213@reddit

Don’t think too much about acting a certain way, that gets awkward. As long as you are polite just be yourself and enjoy your trip to England! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿

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fr0stynugz@reddit

British people love manners 😂 just be super polite, say thank you a lot, compliment their cooking, stuff like that

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False-Spend8335@reddit

We like our tea. Offer to make it, often. Hydrates Brits are happy Brits.

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Too_much_Colour@reddit

Koreans from what I’ve seen are polite so there’s a low risk of that. I know my friend’s girlfriend from India was told not to look at her phone so much when with other people from the uk so maybe think about that

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BigB0ner6969@reddit

Piss all over the toilet seat to establish dominance.

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Known_Confusion9879@reddit

Be yourself. Everybody else is already taken. There are no fast rules.

The English are more likely to accept no thank to mean no thank-you so if you wish to try something don't politely refuse as you will not be offered a second time. Unlike most cultures where you say I have just eaten and you are instead offered a small snack of a 12 course meal appearing from no where.

Take cues from your girlfriend and other people around you, and ask if in doubt. Fortunately as an outsider, that is not born next door, you can get away with slips and mistakes with just polite smiles.

[-]

TheBestBigAl@reddit

if you wish to try something don't politely refuse as you will not be offered a second time

I'm not so sure about this. It's pretty common here to play the game of:
"Would you like a biscuit?".
"Oh no thank you, I really shouldn't".
"Are you sure?".
"Oh go on then".

[-]

ibnwashiya@reddit

I think the key word here is “shouldn’t”. Implies desire, kept in check on by fragile, easily broken morals

[-]

Norman_debris@reddit

Similarly, don't think you're being polite by overriding a "no".

I mean, if they say you don't need to help in the kitchen, don't insist that you help. If someone has already offered to pay, don't make a thing of you paying instead. Don't think you're being polite by refusing a gift either. Just accept.

[-]

Thread-Hunter@reddit

When you take a dump, open the window and use air freshener. 💩

[-]

Shpongle92@reddit

To add to this, it’s customary to announce that you are going to the loo when you leave an occupied room.

[-]

neilm1000@reddit

And make sure you ask for the poop knife.

[-]

Darthblaker7474@reddit

Poo Knife, wer're Brits after all.

[-]

Thread-Hunter@reddit

Is that knife for spreading or slicing n dicing?

[-]

neilm1000@reddit

Slicin' and dicin' my friend. Slicin' and dicin.'

[-]

Raspberry_Rippled@reddit

Also, do NOT dump in the toilet, do it in the sink then carry it outside to dispose of. Doing a dump in the toilet is offensive to us Brits.

[-]

jnthhk@reddit

This is totally wrong. You have to poo out of the window, as per the above comment.

[-]

Raspberry_Rippled@reddit

That's only if its a upstairs toilet.

[-]

jnthhk@reddit

Some would also consider it appropriate for a downstairs toilet that’s adjacent to the patio, where the family are currently eating their lunch.

[-]

HeavenDraven@reddit

Don't open the window if they have cats!

Soray a bit of air freshener on the water in the loo before you use it, it really does seem to reduce smells.

Don't block it!

[-]

Virtual-Eye-2998@reddit

Also don't leave sliders.

[-]

oona_star@reddit

dont refuse tea

[-]

Angryleghairs@reddit

Don't slurp drinks. Chew food with your mouth closed. Don't talk with food in your mouth

[-]

Jonny2Fingers666@reddit

Don't eat all the mini pork pies out the fridge and blame her dad when he is out.

[-]

rondal99@reddit

Make sure you have very loud sex when you’re sure they can hear you. They’ll appreciate that you are giving their daughter pleasure and possibly providing them with grandchildren.

[-]

Miserable-March-1398@reddit

Say yes to every cup of tea you’re offered.

Or when they are relaxing, 19:15/19:45ish in time with the adverts on telly stand up and proclaim “I’m going to pop the kettle on, would anyone like a brew?” Then look them in the eyes individually, say their names warmly, then inquire “how do you take it - milk? Sugar?”

You can learn a lot about people from how they drink their tea.

End visit with gift, tea towel maybe?

Obviously don’t forget to talk about the oncoming rain or blistering heat every three hours.

[-]

NeedingInspo101@reddit

There are some ridiculously stupid comments on here. Ignore them. Politeness and good manners are key as are offering to help out where possible.

[-]

New-Restaurant2573@reddit

Ask them if they're leave or remain.

[-]

One-Campaign1358@reddit

you be fine! You are thinking about it

[-]

flyingredwolves@reddit

Use your please and thank yous a lot and generally be polite.

A lot of British culture is built around a level of politeness that may not exist in other cultures.

[-]

lovinglifeatmyage@reddit

Offer to help with housework, cooking, washing dishes etc. they’ll probably refuse, but you’ve offered. and make sure you’re respectful and you clean up after yourself.

Also tell them you’d love to practice your English on them, it’s a great opportunity whilst you’re here to improve it

And have a great holiday

[-]

Geepandjagger@reddit

Make an effort. Help out with some odd jobs like washing up, tidying, offer to cook, take them out for / make a thank you meal. Lots of pleases and thank yous. They are probably stressing about Korean culture too (my wife technically is Muslim so my parents were stressing about halal stuff etc) so put them at ease that Koreans are normal people too. We have some weird habits I know as British that my wife has asked about and tend to be a bit cold sometimes and it can be awkward staying in someone's house so be polite and considerate and don't expect them to change probably better if you try to be flexible.

[-]

Efficient-Kick-2343@reddit

Always observe the tea time alarrm

[-]

Comfortable-mouse05@reddit

Watch the documentary meet the parents

[-]

Annika_Desai@reddit

British people aren't open and clear about what they like and want, preferring to instead be resentful and talk behind people's back. This is what I hace learned from my observations:

Take a gift when you go see them: flowers and a yummy treat like chocolates.
Wipe your feet at the door and, if everyone else has no shoes on, take off your shoes. Some people don't mind shoes in house, but many people who are house proud prefer people remove them.
When staying there, randomly bring in some groceries as a form of contribution. You could also take them out to dinner, but buying groceries always pleases us brits as it shows consideration and homely behaviours that will make you seem a good match for their kid.
Say morning or good morning to them when you wake and say goodnight when you're going to bed.
If there's only 1 bathroom, ask if anyone else is going to need to use it before having a bath/shower. This shows courtesy and an awareness of the needs of other people.
Keep your stuff tidy.
If they provide food, always say thank you.
Compliment them but not too much.

British people will act weird when you compliment. They may deny the complimen, insult themselves, say something odd, but that's the British way! It's a form of modesty. Like, imagine you said wow, this food is lovely, they may say no, it's just basic. Don't be put off, we do this to be humble but we still like compliments.

Best of luck 🙂

[-]

metechgood@reddit

Britian is a very class based system so it completely depends on the socio-economic class. The different classes in the UK, may as well be completely seperate cultures & don't get me started on the north/south divide.

Can I ask what they do for a living? How wealthy are they?

[-]

Think_Substance_1790@reddit

Omg this is the worst thread 😂

In general just be polite. Decent people will understand cultural differences. People in the UK are either going to be very serious, or crack jokes about everything. Even at another's expense.

What is appropriate in my home, isnt necessarily the same as a friends home.

So speak to your gf, and she'll keep you right.

[-]

Fanaticlyapp@reddit

Not a rule; but find out what football team or Rugby team her father supports and do your research>

[-]

TimorousWarlock@reddit

Don't fuck in their bed. It's considered impolite.

[-]

LahmiaTheVampire@reddit

To this day I’m still not sure why my ex wanted us to sleep in, and fuck, in her parents bed.

[-]

KaChoo49@reddit

That’s a hell of a red flag wtf 😭

[-]

SignificantZombie729@reddit

Especially if they walk in on you mid thrust!

[-]

Trick-Station8742@reddit

Was seeing this girl once a very long time back. She was 19 I was about 23.

Met her family for the first time after being invited to dinner. After a bit of a grilling in the front room from her dad about what I want from their eldest daughter, what my job is etc they went upstairs, about 10pm.

I then proceeded to plough the ever living daylights out of her on the living room floor.

Good times.

[-]

Pircster38@reddit

Carpet muncher

[-]

heyitsed2@reddit

Especially if they're still in it.

[-]

Virtual-Eye-2998@reddit

So wait until they get out so it's still warm?

[-]

heyitsed2@reddit

Keeping the sheets warm is a sure fire way to impress your partners parents!

[-]

Safe_Routine_7453@reddit

Also and opportunity to impress them with your knowledge of English history around the use of professional bed warmers in 16-18th century

[-]

Virtual-Eye-2998@reddit

Also it's considered poor form to leave your Jonny on the floor. If there's no bin throw it out the window, don't try and flush it and risk a floater bobbing back up

[-]

Nancy_True@reddit

So that’s where I’ve been going wrong…

[-]

Superb-Pudding-6532@reddit

Brilliant 👍

[-]

FootballPublic7974@reddit

Offering sloppies can help to smooth over any social faux pas.

[-]

Automatic-Cow-9969@reddit

Yeh the sofa is for guest fucking

[-]

Virtual-Eye-2998@reddit

The wife doesn't like it when I do that. I'm to leave them alone.

[-]

volunteerplumber@reddit

Slightly different, but my wife is Chinese and I had the same feelings when I went to stay at theirs in China.

Be polite
Offer to help out where you can, I always made sure I did the washing up when we'd finished eating.
Try things out! If they offer to do something or try some food, give it a shot!
If you're brave, offer to cook them some Korean food! You might need to keep it tame though (British and spicy food haha).
Lastly, and this was hard for me, but try to talk to them a bit more. At the time my wife's English wasn't the best but my parents adored talking to her and would try their hardest to speak clearly and explain well.

[-]

johnbentlegs@reddit

If it's yellow, then let it mellow.

If it's brown, flush it down.

[-]

Riewd@reddit

Underware on the outside for a formal breakfast

[-]

caarl0s@reddit

A common courtesy would be to piss reguarly in the sink in the bathroom it's considered an honor to have guests do this.

[-]

NoEnthusiasm2@reddit

Ok. So be respectful but don't be too formal. Be friendly. Offer to wash the dishes after dinner or load the dishwasher (they will probably say no but the gesture means a lot). Offer to make a cup of tea for everyone once you've been there a day or two (We like tea!). Leave every room as you found it. Shut the garden gate if there is one. Don't offer to pay for dinner for everyone if the dad is playing host. Take a small gift like a bottle of wine or chocolates (or something Korean which would be even better!) when you arrive.

[-]

MintberryCrunch____@reddit

The tea one is tricky, not to assume but if you don’t make tea regularly this could become a recurring joke further down the line, it’s not hard yet I think Brits have certain expectations and it can still be fucked up.

For context my mother-in-law puts milk in while the bag is still in and I have to politely find a way to make it when offered, I may have yelped the first time, it did not go unnoticed.

[-]

Gloomy_Insurance3203@reddit

I’m 25 years into a relationship and my mother in law has made me two teas. One when I didn’t know what had happened and the second I actually asked.

Milk first doesn’t let the tea brew properly.

[-]

LmbLma@reddit

Check her hard drive. Milk first is so wrong.

[-]

Buddy-Matt@reddit

Don't offer to pay for dinner for everyone if the dad is playing host.

I don't agree with this one. Unless Dad (or Mum) has explicitly stated it's on them, OP should be at the very minimum offering to cover their share, if not pay for everyone for at least one meal.

The offer will likely be politely refused, but the offer itself (and not then insisting, which is key) will be seen much more favourably than OP keeping their wallet resolutely in their pocket

[-]

WillC5@reddit

The spiciest tteokbokki you can find.

[-]

Iforgotmypassword126@reddit

These are really good suggestions.

I’d add, offer to get everyone a takeaway one night. It’s not as formal as going out for dinner (which is also fine to offer) but it’s nice way to say, thank you for hosting for me.

Also one night on holiday, ask to take them all for dinner as a thank you.

I’m assuming you have the budget for this. If that’s not your situation don’t worry it’s not expected, but it would be a nice token of gratitude

[-]

hellyfrosty@reddit

Or offer to cook everyone some lovely Korean food- easy on the spice though, we’re not known for being good at handling spice/chilli heat!

[-]

majesticjewnicorn@reddit

Leave the Buldak noodles at home lol

[-]

GlobalRonin@reddit

... can do a double-whammy with this one if the neighbours have a yappy dog.

[-]

Iforgotmypassword126@reddit

Yeah definitely but I think a takeaway early on is better because it can be awkward in someone else’s kitchen.

[-]

Sweaty-Peanut1@reddit

Daughter can help though!

[-]

Digidigdig@reddit

A bunch of flowers for your girlfriends mum when you leave would likely gain you mo brownie points (avoid anything with Lillies if they have a cat; killing it would have the opposite effect)

[-]

SkipsH@reddit

Flowers as a gift for the mother are also a great gift for the father. I have given my grandmother flowers occasionally and my grandfather has mentioned repeatedly and happily how happy they made her.

[-]

atomicheart99@reddit

when you leave

Won’t she notice him hiding them behind his back the whole time?

[-]

pajamakitten@reddit

They would also be all wilted from a lack of water.

[-]

SkipsH@reddit

If you are giving a korean gift, I don't recommend Bbeolddok-ju.

[-]

SaltyName8341@reddit

Soju goes down well especially the fruit flavoured ones

[-]

londongas@reddit

Show an interest in their lives, be a good listener

[-]

Level-Walk-8981@reddit

Ooof! OP never ask a Brit! We will invariably tease you mercilessly! 🤣😋

Non teasing: just behave the way you would want a guest to behave in your own home or towards your own parents. Be courteous, polite and friendly, and help out where you can. But don’t over do it. And as they’re your GF’s parents: make sure you show them you love and respect her.

Bring them a little gift as a Thank You for hosting. It doesn’t need to be expensive. Just something that shows thought. Maybe some treats from your country? If you’re not sure what, a tea/ brew of some sort, a bottle of spirit or liquor, or something for breakfast (eg a spread or a jam like thing) is always a safe bet.

Mabye ask your GF if there’s anything they’d like you to pick up in Duty Free? My family all live abroad and they love it when I can get Duty Free price make up, perfume, etc for them. Or electronics. They’d have to pay you back for those but they can be significantly cheaper than in the UK so they‘d likely appreciate you helping them get for cheaper.

And maybe offer to take them out to dinner one evening. Doesn’t need to be fancy, your GF can advise but the local pub can do.

And look up a couple of things you can do such as sightseeing so you both show curiosity and are not at home all day!

Enjoy! And tell us all about it!

[-]

Questjon@reddit

My brother's Korean girlfriend was a bit off put by us wearing shoes in the house and having the toilet in the same room as the shower. Don't know if that's a common reaction or she was just a bit sheltered though. So I'd say keep your mouth shut it if that upsets you.

[-]

fireintheglen@reddit

Shoes in the house is definitely not universal. I was definitely brought up to take them off when you come inside, so there must be some variability there.

[-]

Questjon@reddit

Yeah absolutely, it's definitely a per household policy.

[-]

fireintheglen@reddit

Yeah, and I agree with the general sentiment of accepting things that are different. Just wanted to bring it up as it's really something you need to follow your host's lead on.

[-]

Ok_Astronaut_3235@reddit

Exactly this, not just Asia but Eastern Europe as well, no no no shoes in the house. Definitely something to follow what the host does.

[-]

thegreyman1986@reddit

It’s funny you say this, growing up we were a “take your shoes off at the door” family, until around 2005/2006, id already moved away by that point but came home for Christmas and in the meantime my parents had put down wood flooring, took off my shoes when I went in and they were like “don’t worry about it it’s wood flooring” … I guess it kind of makes sense, because previously it was cream coloured carpet and that stains incredibly easily, so wood flooring that you can mop if a little mud is on your shoe I can understand why you wouldn’t be as insistent on removing shoes, but after 20 years it was a complete shock to my system

[-]

man_onion_@reddit

We were a shoes-on household and I therefore kept the same rule when I moved out, now my rug is ruined from people rubbing their dirty shoes on it when they come over and it's too late to change the rule 🤦🏻‍♀️ every time we have guests I'm just staring daggers at their feet

[-]

SkipsH@reddit

There definitely is, I always ask people when I arrive at their house "shoes off?"

[-]

Deep_Narwhal_5758@reddit

I’m British and wearing shoes in the house is an absolute no-no, even now that I live away from home I still don’t unless it’s very quickly doing something and absolutely never on carpets in rooms (I just find it really unhygienic, hallways are bit more unavoidable but I’m less likely to be barefoot walking around those). My housemate however always wears shoes in the house, and she’s from the opposite end of the country so I wonder if it’s an area thing?

[-]

thorny_business@reddit

Where else would you put the shower? What if you need both?

[-]

FriendshipForeign145@reddit

I need the shower on to poop

[-]

linmanfu@reddit

The comment up the chain surprises me, because integrated toilet-bathrooms are common in Korea. And many of them go even further: they are usually "wet" bathrooms where the whole thing is tiled and there's a drain in the floor, which sometimes doubles up as a squat toilet, as though the toilet is in the shower. Cubicles are used as well, but I wonder whether the Korean visitor was actually surprised by how separate the UK ones are, especially if the host had a carpeted bathroom.

[-]

RisingDeadMan0@reddit

i mean usually there is a drain for the shower too though right, but my experience is from a different country but the style you describe is the exact same.

Which can be a pain if your taking your trousers/pants off and the floor is wet/damp, because someone had a shower

[-]

Jack-Rabbit-002@reddit

No No Shoes in the house it's 2025 You can maybe get away with it if you're a paramedic or a workman

[-]

Questjon@reddit

I'm a shoes on household, downstairs only mind. I'm in and out between the house, allotment and workshop constantly it'd be a huge ball ache to take them off every time. Not sure what the year has to do with it, was there some breakthrough in shoe technology recently?

[-]

FriendshipForeign145@reddit

Yes. Crocs.

[-]

FriendshipForeign145@reddit

Shoes in the house is a big no no

[-]

Darthblaker7474@reddit

Growing up we were a very strict no shoes on the floor in the house at all.

We still have to do the funny little "hop on one food whilst you place the other inside" whenever I'm at my mum's. At home I'm much more liberal however if it's rained, or you're going upstairs/in the front room then shoes come off.

[-]

linmanfu@reddit

Shoes in the house is considered disgusting across East Asia.... Because it is.

[-]

Etheria_system@reddit

Shoes in the house is disgusting

[-]

xDzerx@reddit

ngl I find it weird to wear shoes in-doors. I live in the North-East and was brought up that it is rude to wear shoes indoors. All my friends and family are the same lmao.

[-]

rivains@reddit

As someone who lived in Korea, I can concur with the shoe thing but not the toilet thing. Maybe in older houses for sure, but not in apartments (which the majority of Koreans live in nowadays due to population density)

[-]

lika_86@reddit

Shoes in the house is off-putting and gross.

[-]

PromotionChance1237@reddit

Google what a bday is save yourself embarrassment

[-]

Wiedegeburt@reddit

If you need the toilet in the night and the house is small with thin walls if it's yellow let it mellow , if it's brown flush it down

[-]

maddoggo33@reddit

Ask for your poop scoop.

Compliment them on their flag.

Tell them how beautiful and diverse England is thanks to immigration.

[-]

Blushing_Willow3506@reddit

It’ll just depend on the rules of the household. There’s not really set protocols or processes for this stuff here I’m afraid! Ask your partner and she’ll be able to highlight anything specific

[-]

tartanthing@reddit

Keep your fingers crossed her dad hasn't invited all her mad uncles

[-]

tartanthing@reddit

Remember to ask your girlfriend's mother for a "bitty" when she serves tea.

[-]

dcminx96@reddit

Bring a gift with you. Food is usually good but flowers or a plant can work. Otherwise just be nice and respectful and offer to help with washing up or cooking (they will probably turn you down but they'll like that you asked).

[-]

Stokesyyyy@reddit

In the UK there are generally not as many "rules" or ways than what there are in other countries, especially compared to non-European countries.

Just be sociable and friendly that really is the main thing. The parents are going to be happy that their daughter has a nice partner who is friendly and looks like he will look after her well.

[-]

expostulation@reddit

Learn to make tea and offer to make them a cuppa.

[-]

A_Chip_In_The_Sugar@reddit

Don’t sleep with her Mum.

[-]

SeaGiraffe915@reddit

A man with no rules is not a man

[-]

Killybug@reddit

It’s tradition to smoke cigarettes inside their house as soon as you arrive. Her parents will find this charming because it displays your confidence and comfort with the situation. Parents also appreciate negative criticism on decor and any food which is prepared for you. They will see that you are capable of expressing your views independently. Feel free to ask plenty of questions like “What time can I leave?” Or “Why is dinner taking you so long?” And when food does arrive make them chuckle by asking “What did I do to deserve this?”.

Before ending the trip make sure you congratulate her father and say he should be proud of her ‘performance’ and then wink at him to garnish affection.

Good luck!

[-]

Ok-Concept-9102@reddit

3pm its mandatory that if u at home u should make them all a cup of tea

All seriousness enjoy your time don’t worry too much all families are different when its comes to stuff like shoes in house etc

[-]

Keziah_70@reddit

Offer to make them tea and offer to wash up.

[-]

FishUK_Harp@reddit

Say "please" when you aks for anything.

This might sound obvious to some, but to some foreigners - especially Americans, in my experience - "please" is reserved for when you're effectively pleading. In British English should be used with every request to be polite, in a similar way to "thank you" when being given something.

[-]

SignificantZombie729@reddit

Always offer to help clear the table and wash the dishes, it really goes a long way to endearing and impressing the parents. Ie say "let me do that, it's the least I can do as you've been hosting me. If they let you do it, then do it well but always ask.

[-]

james8807@reddit

Koreans talk openlyabout being fat/not fat - its a cultural thing i understand. I would refrain from doing that in the UK where people are very sensitive to it.

[-]

DeezRedditPosts@reddit

Don't actually "help yourself", it's a polite gesture that actually means "ask first"

[-]

Biggeordiegeek@reddit

All families are different

But if you wanted to win my mum over, and let’s be frank, mums opinions are usually more important, be polite, offer to help serve up dinner, set the table, wash the dishes

My mum would rather die than let a guest help, but when they offer, she is their friend for life

Perhaps offer to cook for the family one night, something from Korea, perhaps check with your lass regarding their preferences

To win my dad over, it would be able to talk about football, or whatever sport he might be into, again check with your lads, and as long as he isn’t a Sunderland supporter you should be fine 😜

But of course not all dads are into sport, so whatever hobby he has, perhaps show an interest, with my father in law it was fishing, I hate fishing, I went with him a few times, he figured out I hated it, but liked that I tried it with him to try and bond

But if you are like the other Korean people I know who have come to the UK, talk, their assumption you don’t know much English, is a bit daft, cause many Koreans can speak better English than a lot of us can, the accent can make people think otherwise, try and make conversation and perhaps even ask them to talk to you about mundane things “to help improve your conversational English” things about what’s going on with the soaps they watch the cats eating habits, encouraging conversation can help to break a lot of ice, and even if there is an accent they will soon figure it out

And let’s be honest, as far as accents go, a Korean one is probably easier to understand than thick Geordie or Scouse

[-]

YourLocalMosquito@reddit

Always offer to help clear the table after dinner. I’m sure they will refuse but offer anyway.

[-]

livvyxo@reddit

Food is not shared, what's on everyone's plates is their food. Don't lean over and pick food off other people's plates. Don't expect to try what other people order.

Source: Taiwanese bf learned the hard way

[-]

Dragonfruit-Agitated@reddit

Never offer to do the Washing Up .This can cause great offence .

[-]

BlackberryDramatic24@reddit

Be yourself!

[-]

Tsuntsundraws@reddit

Use please and thank you for every favour or action they do for you, some families HATE when someone doesn’t do it, also some people have a thing against starting your meal before everyone else has gotten theirs, so maybe wait and see what other people are doing if you eat there

[-]

reddicted1304@reddit

Always help the mother get washed and dressed in the morning

[-]

Pircster38@reddit

Never crap in the shower. Don't leave toe nail clippings on the floor. Make sure you queue where necessary. Ask the parents if it's okay to have nookie. Don't assume it's okay. Don't ask the dad if you can borrow a contraceptive. Offer to buy it. Buy the dad a bottle of decent whisky and the mother some chocolates.

[-]

RuneClash007@reddit

Assuming you're both of age, have VERY loud sex and tell her dad in the morning that you're thankful for everything he's done, but your her daddy now

[-]

gunther_higher@reddit

Eat whatever is offered and say its better than Korean food, they'll love that.

Also the food is shit by the way

[-]

AlternativeLie9486@reddit

Be yourself. Say please and thank you. Be nice to your girlfriend. Ask if you can help with household tasks when they are happening (chopping vegetables, putting away shopping, washing up).

[-]

MedsunMcr@reddit

Our rules aren't really rules.

But for fucks sake, don't shit in the downstairs toilet, and when you do go, put the seat down

[-]

ClassroomDowntown664@reddit

just talk about the weather and get involved with what ever is going on

[-]

luckystar2591@reddit

Say please and thank you loads. Brits are big on this.

No matter what food they offer you, accept and say it's nice.

Unless....it's the last one of something. If someone is saying do you want the last piece of cake..or chicken thigh in that context, it means they want it.

Drink tea.

Offer to help clean up after dinner. The conversation for this will go something like this...'you don't have to, stay sat down' but get up anyway. They are just saying that to be polite.

[-]

DerbyForget@reddit

Offer to make a 'cuppa tea' at least once every 5 minutes.

[-]

stowgood@reddit

You need to beat her dad at brood war with the extended family watching. Then take their biscuits and crush them into dust and spread the dust around the living room for good luck.

[-]

straypenguin@reddit

You'll have to adjust to shoes indoors and tea being offered at regular intervals. Decide how you like your tea (milk, sugar etc) and accept it from time to time, this is the way British people bond and fill empty time. Otherwise being the usual polite and tidy noonchi-eyed Korean person will carry over nicely. Bring lots of nice Korean gifts as cultural exchange. Get your gf to prep you on the various social cues, British people all have their ways of saying "I would like to take a break from you now" but will never say it direct.

[-]

GraphicDesignMonkey@reddit

Offer to help with the clearing up after dinner/washing dishes. If they say no, insist at least twice more. If they give in, help, if they insist you don't, don't.

[-]

joooaconfused@reddit

It’s considered good luck to tread in dog poo

[-]

Bride-of-wire@reddit

Don’t forget the British Tea Alarm. It sounds 6 times per day and wherever you are and whatever you’re doing you must stop immediately and search out the nearest kettle. If you’re walking past a house it’s essential that you knock on their door and ask “is the kettle on?”. You can download the Tea Alarm from the app/Google store - be sure you have it installed before you leave the airport, you don’t want to get in trouble with the Tea Police. Good luck!

[-]

Jacktheforkie@reddit

Be polite, expect that you won’t have phone signal (the uk has absolutely awful coverage) are you gonna be driving? If so you may need a driving permit, check the laws

[-]

sallymariehunt@reddit

Offer to make them cups of tea

[-]

9LONEWOLF2@reddit

Don’t piss in the sink

[-]

SupaSpurs@reddit

You have to support Spurs and visit White Hart Lane! A bottle of whiskey for dad And don’t try to shag the mum. Enjoy your trip.

[-]

HonestExtent7745@reddit

Usually on the 8th day of the week, we celebrate national Pie day and cook up a big dish of scrumptious pies. Make sure to speak about pie day.

[-]

FrankieSuvksPlums@reddit

Slurping is not polite.

[-]

propostor@reddit

Coming from Korean culture I am 100% certain the level of respect you show her parents will already greatly exceed their expectations, so don't worry about it.

[-]

ljr69@reddit

Highclere?

[-]

PMFSCV@reddit

I'm seeing a remake of Lucky Jim here, Lucky Joo

[-]

simmyawardwinner@reddit

dont impersonate the british, and look up 'courtesy flush'. also bring them fortnum and masons or harrods tea from the airport

[-]

franky8512@reddit

The only rule you should follow is not to follow any advice from this thread.

[-]

Gooses_Gooses@reddit

Girlfriend of almost three years here! When I first took my boyfriend home to my parents I rushed him in with a “hi dad, this is insert name, he’s staying for a few nights, bye” and rushed him into my room. He didn’t really see much of them until a few days later, which now makes me giggle that I held him hostage in my room. He spends a lot of time at my parents house andhelps my dad around the house in return of beers and food. In my defence my boyfriend and I were uni assigned flatmates so we’d essentially spent every night in his bed since our first proper date. My parents paid thousands of pounds in uni accommodation only for me to use my bedroom as a dressing room for most of the year 💀 fortunately my parents love my boyfriend, especially my dad - my mum really likes him, but my dad LOVES having another guy around with a similar sense of humour to him, as well as genuinely liking him as a person. Genuinely think if we split up my dad would ask to keep my boyfriend and get rid of me 💀

[-]

Teji0104@reddit

I have been in the exact opposite situation (British Guy staying at my Korean partners house in Korea).

I would say we have much fewer social etiquette rules, depending on the sort of family your girlfriend comes from. Just treat them similarly to how you treat your girlfriend, casual but respectful.

We don't really have a 반말 / 존댓말 situation in the UK, unless your girlfriends Father or Mother is like a Lord or Lady. Sometimes, overly formal can be worse than overly casual.

If you make yourself tea or coffee, it's expected that you offer to everyone (so do yourself a favour and wait for someone else to do it, unless you want to memorise 8 different drink orders).

If you have any specifics about Korea vs Britain, I can provide more apples to apples comparisons for you.

[-]

ShufflingToGlory@reddit

I'm sure you've already heard about this but toilets are a bit different in the UK.

There are two connected porcelain repositories. The larger lower bowl is for number 1 (urine plus used paper) and the raised, rectangular smaller one is for number 2 (bowel movements).

Feet on the bowl, squat and complete your business. Paper goes between your legs into the lower bowl for flushing.

Simply replace the top lid after finishing to prevent any odours leaking out.

Bit of an odd system I know. Countries tend to commit to a sitting or squatting type toilet. I suppose it's a relic of the empire that Britain ended up with a hybrid approach!

[-]

Alarmed-Bad7178@reddit

Show them your culture.

Take a shit load of Soju and make them stand outside taking swigs from the bottle and pass it around.

Bring disposable plastic gloves and eat fried chicken with your hands.

Play K-Pop really loudly and when they try to come into the room to tell you to turn it down, stop them at the door and tell them it’s Koreans only beyond this point.

Lock her Dad up for ten years and then make him have sex with your gf.

[-]

GlassReply1639@reddit

We are big on flags at the moment so buy them a Union Jack or St George’s flag as a gift for them welcoming you into their home.

[-]

notThaTblondie@reddit

Clean up after yourself, help with the washing up after dinner, dont get drunk, dont have loud sex.

[-]

Celessara@reddit

Bring them gifts from your homeland. And/or flowers for the mother. Korean tea maybe if that’s a thing? They like tea.

[-]

thelotuseater13@reddit

Don't be a twat

[-]

qgwheurbwb1i@reddit

Just be polite, respectful and clean up after yourself.

British people like manners, kindness and a good gesture (like offering to help out with any chores).

Maybe turn up with some flowers or chocolates for the parents as a thank you for letting you stay.

I'm sure you'll be fine, and I bet your girlfriend will want you to make a good impression so she won't give you any bad advice!

Good luck OP!!

[-]

Gullible_Passion_331@reddit

Call them the noun 'cunts' - it's a typical loving and endearing way that we English call each other.

[-]

Actual-Morning110@reddit

Respect elders

[-]

DamnitGravity@reddit

we barely talked. When I asked my girlfriend about it, she said they didn’t talk much to me because they thought my English wasn’t good

How is your English? Do people tend to struggle to understand you in general? Because this sounds a little... potentially racist, and given the attitude towards foreigners in the UK lately, I'd be very wary of this.

As others have said, be polite, bring a gift of food or wine or something, and offer to pay for dinner one night, either eat out or takeaway. Offer to help where you can and know you're able.

[-]

Subsyxx@reddit

Use protection.

[-]

weeble182@reddit

"I've got a flipping gun"

[-]

Darthblaker7474@reddit

*ruddy

[-]

ChewpapaNeebrae@reddit

Woah there, no need for such strong language.

[-]

ajtyler776@reddit

Right. Guard dog. Smart…

[-]

pajamakitten@reddit

Get a Bully XL to show you really mean business.

[-]

HuntWorldly5532@reddit

EAT QUIETLY!

I am British with an Asian (HK) husband... Nothing drives my parents whappier than my husband's eating sounds. He appreciates food and is naturally mukbang... Just... Try to be silent lol

Other than that, you just have to initiate conversations and help them to feel natural talking to you. They may worry about not having any shared common interests and assume the cultural divide is too big... Try and find something to bond with them over, they will cling to small talk (insignificant conversation topics) like a lifeline, and will appreciate the easy subjects to warm up with. Do be too formal and stiff. Show them who their child loves. Limit the PDA but don't be hands-off and show coldness/aloofness. Take flowers, and don't put much thought into the type - choose based on mom's favourite colour or type. Meanings don't apply usually.

Be helpful in the kitchen without being asked, even if it is just washing a mug you've finished with.

If you are staying for a while, there is little a Brit loves more than being offered a drink. Key is learning how they like it, ideally without asking directly and using observation instead 🤗 you don't want them to feel like they are waiting on you unless they really are that type, but most aren't. Certainly not to Asian standards. If you are given the freedom to use their facilities at will (overnight guest) then you should try to offer to do odd jobs or at least make rounds of drinks every now and again.

Everything I wish I had known to warn my husband of hahaha Good luck Remember, they won't bite 😆

[-]

memaurmaur@reddit

Pull out the chairs for the ladies as they are sitting down is a nice gesture .

[-]

MammothDirector4472@reddit

LOL at all these comments telling a KOREAN to be polite.

저도 아내가 영국인인데 반갑습니다. 일반적인 한국인의 상견례 예의범절 수준이면 영국에선 왕실 대우와 맞먹기 때문에 걱정하실 필요 없을 것 같네요. 미국인에 비해 낯을 많이 가리고 낯선 사람들 앞에선 많이 어색한게 영국인인 것 같다는 생각이 드네요. 남남 녀녀로 나누어 어울리는 문화가 짙기 때문에 예비장인어른과 공통 관심사가 있다면 대화의 문을 열기 쉬울거에요. 아마 아시겠지만 대부분의 영국 남자는 축구에 열광하고 자신만의 팀이 하나씩 있는 편입니다. 살고 있는 지역 또는 도시마다 지역부심이 심하기 때문에 그 지역에 대해 배우고자 하면 더더욱 어필이 될 수 있구요. 도움이 되었길 바랍니다!

[-]

moneywanted@reddit

The most important rule is to realise there are a lot of jokers in the comments here!

Cup nobody’s balls except your own.

[-]

davetiso@reddit

Keep your snake in the cage for the next 72 hours…

[-]

SkipsH@reddit

Shoes off or not is at the owner of the houses perogative. Asking "shoes off?" when you arrive gets you the answer you need to whether you should or not.

[-]

acojsx@reddit

Make your bed when wake up - if you make a hot drink offer if they want a "what you are making/tea". Don't bring Korean biscuits/cookies to UK... not really that good (especailly Dr.You).

Maybe something to keep them warm, as our winters are long and miserable.

[-]

DeepStatic@reddit

Never fully close the toilet door. It's considered disrespectful.

[-]

narcoleptictaco@reddit

When you arrive make sure you've got the mum some nice flowers, maybe her favourite chocolate and a crate or bottle of the dad's choice of alcohol. Good way to show your appreciation for them letting you stay and a good conversation starter too

[-]

The_Geralt_Of_Trivia@reddit

Don't flush your faeces down the toilet in the UK. The pipes are too narrow. Wrap it in toilet paper (that's what it's for) and place it on the window sill for the house owner to remove.

If they ask if you want a cup of tea, it's a test. They don't really like tea. It's just a test to see if you are willing to drink it to be polite.

Always kiss the hosts on the lips when greeting.

When you go to the toilet to urinate after your cup of tea you have to whistle or make a low droning noise so other people know you're in the toilet. Not all toilets have locks on the doors so this is to let people know the room is occupied.

You'll be expected to bring a bag of sugar for the hosts as a gift when you first visit. 500g is large enough.

Good luck!

[-]

qualitycancer@reddit

Offer to make a cup of tea. By a couple of days in try some cheeky banter if they are up for it. Complain about the weather to them.

[-]

pants2302@reddit

It's customary to spend your first night in the parents bed with her father the first time you stay over so that he can get to know you properly.

[-]

htatla@reddit

There is nothing for you to do. This is because generally Asian culture is far more respectful than your typical British family

They don’t even take off their shoes

[-]

made-of-questions@reddit

Remember that beginning every conversation with talk about the weather is social protocol. It's a way to prove you are part of the tribe.

[-]

Necessary-Force-4348@reddit

Everything is closed after 4pm on Sunday - make sure you are prepared

[-]

Secret-Chemist8731@reddit

Just don't poop on the carpet, her parents probably would understand… but in this culture we don't do this kind of thing.

[-]

prustage@reddit

If you have sex with your girlfreind in the living room, dont wipe your knob on the curtains. Parent hate that.

[-]

fdvmo@reddit

Don't shag her whilst they are home

[-]

Colonel_Khazlik@reddit

Look for shoes. If there are shoes in the hallway it's presumed you take yours off upon entering.

Varies based on household.

You will be offered drink, it's fine to refuse, but asking for water in place of tea is better.

You will be asked how you are, or how you are feeling. This is a weird one for non Brits, but it's just a courtesy, a short 'ah, I'm great, thanks, how are you?' is sufficient.

[-]

tacticall0tion@reddit

If you shit and clog the toilet, do not attempt to fix it yourself, or throw it out the window.

[-]

Estrella_Dam@reddit

Don't leave the toilet seat up and if you piss on the rim wipe it off

[-]

Two-Theories@reddit

Bring a bottle of korean spirit and some crockery or home decorative item to give them when you arrive. Also, offer to cook for them and/or take them out for dinner one night to thank them for hosting you.

While you're there, you can offer your help when they are doing chores or going run errands and tell them some stories that show your personality or help them get to know you better. Ask them about how they met, what their daughter was like as a kid, their interests now, etc..

[-]

NoExperience9717@reddit

If they're decent parents then how you act with your girlfriend is probably the important part so they can trust you with their daughter. For the house, there's some really good advice here re being polite, offering to help, cleaning up any mess, matching their schedules, complimenting cooking and doing your best to clear your plate.

I would probably add doing your best to spend some time with them rather than being out the door in the morning and back at 10pm straight to your gfs room everyday. It may be difficult to find out what they like but can comment on things you see to find the parents hobbies. For example, if they like board games then try and join in. Or if they like gardening then could ask for a short tour. Not all the time but many people do like talking about their passions and having a new person around can be fun for that.

.

[-]

fudgelover2019@reddit

Remember - on first meeting, you must kiss both parents on each cheek three times, whilst firmly squeezing their shoulders. They will not respect you if your squeezing is weak, nor if you kiss them less than three times.

[-]

sayleanenlarge@reddit

Use their names if you're comfortable with it - parents love that. After a couple of days, if they've said "make yourself at home", offer to make tea by saying "Is it ok if I make a cup of tea? And would anyone else like one?" That's a good one - they feel welcoming and you start to feel that little bit more welcome.

[-]

NotTrynaMakeWaves@reddit

Don’t have very loud and vigorous sex sessions when the parents are in the house. Few parents would be happy to hear their daughter getting railed.

[-]

bosscockuk@reddit

Offer to wash up after meals, flowers/plant for mother.. take dad to the local pub (walking distance) just the two of you ..

[-]

Andy_P1756@reddit

Every morning, without fail, you must comment on the weather

[-]

-the-monkey-man-@reddit

Bring a bouquet of flowers for the mum and a chippy for the dad. Anything less and you’ll be thrown to the pavement.

[-]

rosepose45@reddit

On the language point, if you are still learning English then say right at the beginning that you want to practice as much as possible so you hope they will help you do that even if you make mistakes. That will let them know it’s not awkward for you to speak in English and you want to chat to them. Making a situation a bit awkward by desperately trying to avoid awkward situations is an unfortunate habit of English people (especially me). By not speaking to you they were trying to avoid making you feel awkward, gently let them know you don’t mind.

[-]

cameragirl17@reddit

Be sociable. Clear up after yourself. Offer to help clear up after any meals that were provided. Say thank you. Don’t be too affectionate with your girlfriend - cuddles are fine, snogging in front of the parents isn’t. Pretend you enjoy their company!

[-]

MiinaMarie@reddit

Ask your girlfriend. She'll know if there are certain standards required in her family home or general local customs

[-]

damcgra@reddit

Not to make assumptions but I noticed when I lived in Korea that it can sometimes be OK to make noises when you eat. This wouldn't be acceptable in the UK. People don't slurp or make loud gulps etc.

[-]

Mazza_mistake@reddit

Be polite, make sure you say please and thank you, be respectful of their home and clean up after yourself. and honestly just be yourself and get to know each other, you don’t need to try too hard

[-]

Inevitable-Snowman-9@reddit

If you're planning to have sex in their house then it's custom in the UK to inform the parents before each session.

[-]

jnthhk@reddit

This is true. It allows them to go and stand in the garage until the deed is done. It’s important to let them know it’s safe to come back in when you’re done, and at a volume that allows them to hear from the garage.

LINDA AND PAUL. I JUST CAME. THE SEX IS OVER. YOU CAN COME IN NOW.

[-]

TheoryBrief9375@reddit

If they have any pets then make sure you are friends with the pets. British people value the opinion of their pets about strangers. And no that's not a joke.

[-]

thegreyman1986@reddit

In Britain it’s a traditional greeting when staying at someone’s house for the first time to unzip your trousers, take out your penis, pull your pockets inside out and make a noise like a trumpeting elephant… you have to do it or you’ll offend them

[-]

Roofless_@reddit

Don’t ignore the tea time alarm

[-]

FrauAmarylis@reddit

British people LOVE talking about the weather, about directions detailing how to get to places.

So ask them things like, Has it been a rainy Autumn so far in comparison to with other years?

Ask how far certain castles and places are from their house.

Ask about previous holidays they have enjoyed.

Ask about British sports like Rugby, Cricket, and football. Maybe read up on their favorite sports teams so you can be knowledgeable about them.

[-]

jnthhk@reddit

If you want to bond with the Dad, remember the route you took to the airport and then be prepared to discuss the pros and cons of the alternatives that you could have taken.

(This one isn’t a joke. There’s nothing I like more than the “route chat” I have with my dad after arriving to visit my parents!).

[-]

Solo-me@reddit

It s custom / tradition to have sex with the mother of the girlfriend when meeting her for the first time. They will be very impressed.

[-]

PinkxxAcid@reddit

Say may I and please instead of can I have, offer to help with things such as cooking and washing up or plate clearing 'is there anything I can help you with?, let me help you take these plates away' it'll almost definitely be met with a no but thank you but it will be noted and they'll see it as very polite and well mannered

Shoes are home dependant, watch your gf and her family when you enter see if she takes hers off and if she does follow suit, if she doesn't then make sure you obviously wipe your shoes on their mat at the front door to show you've cleaned them and you're not treading dirt into their home. Shake hands with her mother and father when you first enter, after you enter compliment their home. you might get a hug when you leave at the end of your holiday depending on how much you all bond. Regardless of a parting handshake or hug make sure to thank them for having you and that it was lovely to see them again

If you say no thank you we will accept that answer first time as we don't like to pressure people into taking something they don't want.

[-]

Antique_Client_5643@reddit

I'm a survivor of a Korean/UK relationship, and here's my 2c:

-- talk more than you think you should. They'll be all awkward about your accent etc and too easily it can wind up with nobody saying anything, which then becomes permanent

-- remember none of the formality around family seniority etc exists in the UK, you don't need to be deferential, just polite. It's better to be too chatty IMHO.

-- rules for who pays for what are a bit different, in the UK there are more things a guest pays for, maybe agree with your gf in advance who is paying for items like travel

gl!

[-]

jnthhk@reddit

When you leave a visitors house in the UK it’s polite to do a poo in the toilet cistern and not tell them. It’s our way of saying “thanks, that was a lovely casserole Linda”. Some might say this is a strange this to do, and I guess it is. However, I’m proud of our British traditions.

[-]

One-Subject111@reddit

Don't eat their pets

[-]

ukbot-nicolabot@reddit

A top level comment (one that is not a reply) should be a good faith and genuine attempt to answer the question

[-]

UnacceptableUse@reddit

!tlc

[-]

bl4h101bl4h@reddit

Came here to say "dog".

[-]

TopAd7154@reddit

Be polite and respectful. You sound nice anyway so that shouldn't be difficult. Say Please and Thank you. If they offer you a drink, ask for tea.

[-]

Alan-TheDetroyer@reddit

It's customary to share a bath with the father / man of the house during the first visit, whatever you do don't attempt to bathe alone until you have shown respect to the father, this will be a huge faux pas!

It seems strange but it's typical behaviour for the UK, importantly, do not wait to be invited, just follow the clues, you will probably be given a few minutes warning, act quickly.

Familiarise yourself with the layout of the house and try to preempt the locations of the bathing father

Listen for the sound of water running, this can be a good indication of the start of the cleansing ritual

Good luck

[-]

MonkeyHamlet@reddit

Treat their daughter well. That will buy any level of social faux pas.

[-]

ozyri@reddit

"about twice", "my English is not good" < --- look mate, English is my third language, but they might be onto something.

[-]

Shore_Thing79@reddit

Make sure you listen out for the tea siren

[-]

Sad_Lack_4603@reddit

Oooohh.. quite the minefield we're walking into. Obviously I don't know the people in question, so this is going to be somewhat speculative. But here goes:

1) Understand the family's internal time schedule. What time do they go to bed? What time do they get up? Do they eat breakfast together, etc. Try and fit in. If you're a night owl, and they head for bed soon after 10pm, try and respect that. Don't sleep in if they are the sort of people who eat their toast and boiled eggs at 7.30. If your need for a quick 5K run before breakfast conflicts with the family routine - consider adjusting your schedule to meet theirs.

2) Brits can be a bit funny about food. Specifically, many British families don't like seeing lots of uneaten food on plates. This may prove challenging if they serve up Brussel sprouts or other weird English foods.

3) Same goes for bathroom routines. British houses can be a bit short on available bathroom time. Don't take twenty minute showers or lengthy tub soaks if that is likely to cause issues. British bathrooms also have toilet brushes for a reason. If you think you might need to use one - do so.

4) Being a good guest can be tricky. Always offer to help with the washing up. Many UK houses now have dishwashers. But the offer to help will always be appreciated.

5) Lastly, British people tend to value people saying "please" and "thank you." Using these phrases at the right times will earn you a lot of points in even the most challenging circumstances.

Best wishes, and good luck!

[-]

nostalgebra@reddit

At 9am each day you must face the direction of Buckingham palace and salute the King.

This is followed by a short prayer to his lord and Savior Terry Wogan before leaving the house for the day.

[-]

Ross1303@reddit

It's considered polite to ask the man of the house, the first time alone, what the "pants down policy" is for the household.

Generally there will be a set time in any house where wearing trousers etc is considered rude but it is also considered rude to ask the female members of the household about this.

[-]

Unlucky-Ad2485@reddit

Do what your told ..

[-]

TheSandInTheGlass@reddit

Say 'sorry' and 'thank you' 50% more often than usual.

[-]

linmanfu@reddit

Excellent advice.

[-]

imjedipal@reddit

Hey, just be polite use your manors say please and thank you. Be helpful, British people are very polite and we respect it, after not very long it will get to a point where they’ll drop the polite manor and start acting normal.

[-]

linmanfu@reddit

I know you're trying to be helpful but FYI this isn't. OP is asking because these things are different in different places. E.g. in China, people basically never say please and that's really polite! Also, if you need directions from a older man, you should walk up to him and say "Hi grandpa, where is...". That would weird if not rude in the UK.

[-]

noir_lord@reddit

Manners - otherwise good shout.

Unless you meant an estate during feudal times ;).

[-]

imjedipal@reddit

Hahaha, of course we high tea at 5pm in the courtyard. Father will want to duel oh what fun.

[-]

-Gadaffi-Duck-@reddit

Personally, since they assumed you may not know much English and didn't want to pressure you, I would upon greeting say 'ah Mr and Mrs (insert name) thank you for having me, it's lovely to see you again. I hope we get the opportunity to converse a little more this time'

Any decent brit will be amused for having the ciurage to call out their assumptions without actually calling it out. It should relieve a good bit of tension and relax the atmosphere pretty quick.

Oh and be careful of our banter, as you'll understand from some of the responses in here haha.

[-]

attilathetwat@reddit

Don’t fuck her sister

[-]

Effective-Ad-6460@reddit

Literally ..

Just be yourself.

Your Korean so your manners/politeness is already more than enough.

Respect your girlfriend completely.

Her Dad is trusting you with their daughters well being, show them you are capable.

[-]

kipha01@reddit

If you talk how you type I don't see what their problem is? Just be you and be respectful.

[-]

shinydoctor@reddit

Do the washing up after dinner, they will love you forever for that.

[-]

CactuarLOL@reddit

Be polite and show respect, please and thank you are important here.

Always offer to help out and to tidy or do the washing up after meals.

Perhaps on one day you can offer to cook them their evening meal, one off your favourites from home.

[-]

redrioja@reddit

Tell them you've never tried potatoes.

[-]

Ok_Attitude_8573@reddit

I'd be surprised if there was anything that Koreans do at home that would be a faux pas in UK.

[-]

Peter_gggg@reddit

Definitely go for the 3 kisses on the cheeks mwah, mwah,mwah

Ps I wouldn't stay with my in-laws for 2weeks, and I've been married for yea

3 nights.. fine one week max

[-]

abibofsweat@reddit

If you want a cup of tea ask everyone else if they want one too.

[-]

Annabelle_Sugarsweet@reddit

Bring a gift like a bottle of whisky for dad and gin for mum from the duty free.

[-]

Arsewhistle@reddit

Take off your shoes AND your socks.

Tell everyone that they're welcome to share your toothbrush.

Challenge the father to an arm wrestle; you must exhibit your strength to show that you're worthy.

It's normal for guests to eat as slowly as possible, to show that they wish to saviour and enjoy the food.

[-]

Batmanswrath@reddit

Always say yes when they offer you tea. You'll pee a lot, but they'll be more likely to accept you.

[-]

jacobsnemesis@reddit

Koreans are generally much more polite than Brits. I’m sure if you are yourself and respect the family, everything will be fine.

I wouldn’t say there are any rules as such. Them not speaking to you at all when they visited Korea is pretty rude. I don’t want to make assumptions based off that but they don’t sound the nicest people.

[-]

H16HP01N7@reddit

I think you should ask her the rules in her house, rather than randoms on reddit.

[-]

sausagemouse@reddit

Show general courtousy to strangers too when out. I hear things like keeping the door held open for people walking close behind you and things like that aren't done as much in korea

[-]

Moist_Maintenance800@reddit

Don’t say no to a cuppa; overuse thank you and excuse me; for extra brownie points I’d get mum some flowers and a bottle for dad (if he drinks). Ask to help with setting table/tidying up after meals. Compliment the food and offer help with shopping if applicable. And make sure you follow recycling rules.

[-]

xDzerx@reddit

Some English common sense:-
Use please and thank-you when talking.
Take your shoes off at the house entrance, or at least ask "would you like me to take off my shoes".
Thank the host for any meals - Also let them know if you dislike or are allergic to anything prior
Close the garden gate when leaving/ entering
Don't wear a hat when eating - it is considered rude.

If someone says "Alright?" they are saying hello.. not for your life story.
If your English isn't good as they assumed and you get confused with any words simple ask them to explain.

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mollpet@reddit

Bring lots of kimchi and assert dominance on arrival

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VelikimagCro@reddit

First milk then tea bag then water. Thank me later

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neilm1000@reddit

That could read "first milk then tea bag the daughter."

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Virtual-Eye-2998@reddit

Be rude to forget the mother in that situation

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hallerz87@reddit

Knowing Koreans, your culture is more formal than Britain's. If you stick to what you know, you'll likely come across as very polite.

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ClickerKnocker@reddit

Be polite but relaxed. Be yourself and show them the personality and charm that your girlfriend saw in you.

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SummerBebbi@reddit

Offer to remove your shoes when you enter their home, bring a gift like wine or a biscuit selection. Don't leave the toilet seat up! If you really want to impress, ask if you can help them with anything and offer to wash the dishes after a meal.

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DragonfruitItchy4222@reddit

I presume you already know about presenting them with the ceremonial mangos when you first go to their house.

Id present to them 4-5 since it's nearly autumn.

Obviously dont turn down a cup of tea and ask the brand/to see the box while strongly approving of it when they make it.

Have you already given them both slippers? If so don't forget to bring your own or that'd be very embarrassing.

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Furicist@reddit

Stay clothed in their presence.

No excessive affection to your girlfriend in their presence.

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Calo_Callas@reddit

If you don't make jokes about how often you have sex with their daughter they will take it as an insult to her beauty and hate you.

This is really important, the cruder the jokes the better.

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cdoc365@reddit

Don't use the curtains to wipe yourself clean

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ElectricalPick9813@reddit

Up for over an hour and no one has mentioned a gift of a pineapple. I’m not mad, just disappointed.

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Major-Librarian1745@reddit

Sneak downstairs in the middle of the night, take the cheese out the fridge and slice it into 17 pieces, then hide these around the house on your way back to bed.

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Final_Concentrate100@reddit

Say please when you ask for something. Say thankyou when they give you something or when it's relevant.

Wipe your shoes off at the door if they have a mat.

Get her mother some flowers and a card thanking them for letting you stay. It will go a big way in the long run.

Make sure you thank them both for allowing you to stay.

Offer to wash up (you won't have to).

Mainly just be yourself. British people are forgiving when they know you are trying.

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PsychologicalLayer57@reddit

It would be polite and appropriate to bring a small gift to say "thank you for having me" - a potted plant, flowers, a bottle of wine, a box of chocolates.

Other than that, be polite and respectful and try to follow their cues. Don't get frisky with your girlfriend in their living room. Keep it down late at night. Ask your girlfriend whether her parents would like you to 'make yourself at home' and help yourself to tea/coffee/snacks or whether they prefer you to be 'guests' and have them wait on you. Ask them questions about themselves - their work, hobbies, other children, etc.

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X2seraphim@reddit

Keep your snake in its cage😂

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Raspberry_Rippled@reddit

An informal British greeting that we all adore is "Wanker". Say "Hello you wankers" her parents when you enter their home, it's a weird tradition.

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wankylee@reddit

I would say "Oi Oi cunts" is probably a more appropriate greeting in such a formal situation, at least until they get to know the parents better?

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Raspberry_Rippled@reddit

Yeah, I'm a bit too outgoing. "Oi Oi Cunts" would definitely be more appropriate.

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neilm1000@reddit

Morning benders. Followed by a description of what you got up to the last time Caravan Club was at Camber Sands.

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zeehun@reddit

Do not take this serious OP....sarcasm is a big thing here in the UK

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Bubbly_District_107@reddit

And this is a classic case of British sarcasm, don't listen to him

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ChewpapaNeebrae@reddit

Also, who actually says "Wanker" these days?

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Raspberry_Rippled@reddit

Polite people greeting their girlfriend's family.

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Bubbly_District_107@reddit

Korean tourists hopefully

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Subsyxx@reddit

I thought the father would say it to the daughter's boyfriend?

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Nickjc88@reddit

But the boyfriend would say "not anymore because I'm pumping your daughter".

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bigmustard69@reddit

Just be polite, mirror their behaviours bit because you’re in their home. Offer to help with doing the washing up and stuff after eating. It’s small things mostly that people appreciate. Other than that you’re on your own trying to get to know them haha

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neilm1000@reddit

Just be polite, mirror their behaviours bit because you’re in their home

But don't literally mirror their body language because that's very odd.

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Coconutpieplates@reddit

If you're making tea for yourself, offer to make one for everyone. Offer to cook, offer to wash up. If you're going out just ask if anyone needs anything bringing back. I'm sure you do all these things anyway.

Don't be too concerned with impressing them, British are more used to humbling themselves, especially as a joke. I hope they talk to you more this time!

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Baby8227@reddit

Don’t get pissed and climb in bed beside the mum and dad.

However, if you do, make sure to give her a good slap on bum and say “budge up fatty”.

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BumblebeeNo6356@reddit

Offer to help with things, if they are cooking just say ‘is there anything I can help with’, they will probably say no but it’s nice to offer. Also, treat their daughter with respect, they will be watching your behaviour and will expect you to be respectful to their child. Maybe offer to pay when you go out for coffee or something, it doesn’t need to be a big expense but you want them to know that you are willing to pay your own way. Talk to the parents about what they do, ask about their jobs, their lives etc.

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buy_me_a_pint@reddit

Remember your manners

Offer to a cook a meal

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TunedOutPlugDin@reddit

Simple gift like a colourful Hanji box.

Take them down the pub and proceed to drink them into oblivion with Somaek.

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PolebagEggbag@reddit

If you see a yellow car on the road you're obliged to punch the nearest person on the arm whilst saying "yellow car"

Moths are venomous here so watch out.

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