What do people actually receive on benefits in the UK (with kids, rent etc.)?

My son was starting school and he is disabled. My husband works full time and while our son was young I worked part time while he was at nursery. When starting school though, no childminder or after school club could take him because of his needs. I thought ok I'll train and work in a school. The issue there is that they'd want me to start at 9am, the same time my son starts school. There's no such thing as teleporting so I couldn't physically drop my son off at 9am and be at another school I worked at for 9am too. I'd need someone to be able to have him from 8:30am, there is no one. The same exact issue after school too. There was also the issue of in service days. I'd have to go to work while schools were closed (there's 6 each year in the schools around here). My husband could maybe take those days off work? Nope, he gets 6 weeks off a year and they are decided for him, well at least those are the weeks he picked 15 years a go when he started and he's stuck with them now. So I decided being a childminder myself was the only option. I've been doing it 4 years now and I enjoy it and don't have to worry about school pick ups and drop offs or the school holidays. OP's wife couldn't be one, she has too many of her own children to be able to have the numbers needed to make any sort of decent income from it because your own children count in your numbers at all times. I know you're thinking well her child isn't disabled so maybe she could work in a school, she could use a childminder for half an hour before and after school and in some of the holidays etc. Nope, no childminder is going to block out a whole space for an hour a day and some holidays. Before and after school club? If she wants to pay for 4.5 hours a day when she's only using 1 hour then sure. I'm not saying it's impossible but it's very, very hard. OP's wife could do what a lot of other people do and put her 4 and 9 with a childminder that covers before and after school and holidays and work full time. That is an option, certainly a viable one but then we have the issue of a lack of childminders and especially them having 2 spaces available at the same time. If OP's ex wife doesn't drive, this makes it even harder. There's certainly lots of hurdles to overcome and stress involved to make it work, that's basically what I'm saying.