Tie to a funeral?
Posted by Signal_Sherbert6572@reddit | AskAnAmerican | View on Reddit | 185 comments
Hey so i have to go to a funeral in a few hours to a family member i was close to, ive tried asking my parents and they don't seem to know, on if it's ok for me to wear a tie with red in it, it half black and half red, a dark red not a bright one, I see different answers online, and I just want to make sure, im dressing right, I had to use the last of my money to buy the rest of the outfit, since this all happened last minute, and I didn't have enough to buy a new tie, it's the only one I got and didn't know if it'd be fine, today's is the viewing and it's my first one ever and also first funeral ever for tomorrow, thanks for any help
WishboneNo2829@reddit
I went to my uncle's funeral and several people were wearing jeans and a tee shirt.
Double-Phrase-3274@reddit
Show up, be respectful.
Clothes matter far less than we all pretend.
Source- I was widowed in 2012.
No-Diet-4797@reddit
My mom died a couple years ago. I went out and bought a blouse that is not my style because it was pink with flowers on it. She would've loved it. I had told her previously I'd wear something cheerful in her honor. She always wanted a girly girl and instead she got me lol. I'm sorry for your loss. I can only imagine that level of grief.
Icy_Consideration409@reddit
Sorry for your loss.
And this is the answer.
glorious_cheese@reddit
I just attended a celebration of life (at a synagogue) and I was one of the few dudes wearing a tie. There was even one guy in shorts.
amboomernotkaren@reddit
I went to a funeral recently and there was a guy in shorts. Just no.
Intermountain-Gal@reddit
Yeeeaah. Unless specifically requested, shorts are too casual, at least for most funerals.
I do have a friend who pretty much wears shorts year round — even when it snows. He wears a suit for church (it’s expected) and when he has an important business meeting. I wouldn’t be surprised if, when the day comes many years from now (he’s in his mid-thirties) he’d be laid in his casket in shorts and everyone would be asked to wear shorts at his funeral!
suspicious-donut88@reddit
According to the funeral director we spoke to yesterday (we're planning my fils funeral), there's been a huge increase in men wanting to be laid to rest in shorts.
Bright_Ices@reddit
Weird!
udsd007@reddit
A long-time friend wore shorts all year round — in Newfoundland. I think he was buried in his best pair of shorts. Odds are good that the majority of men at his funeral wore shorts. I miss him.
amboomernotkaren@reddit
That’s perfectly ok. I definitely want everyone to get hammered at my wake and tell funny stories about me. No crying and no voodoo or priests of any kind.
Human-Cauliflower-85@reddit
Most of the funerals I've been to (in a rural area), none of the men wore ties except for the pastor and pall bearers. I've mostly seen men wear flannels or a nice short sleeve shirt. And as far as colors, I've seen all kinds. Even bright colors.
TexasWeather@reddit
The first May I was married to my wife, we were going to go to my nephew’s graduation. She wanted me to wear a suit. I said, “Baby, there won’t be a man in a suit there that doesn’t work for the school.” There were plenty of shorts and overalls though.
Wisdomofpearl@reddit
My husband always wears a tie, but he is usually the in the extreme minority. In contrast one of his cousins usually shows up in pajamas or sometimes sweats and a tee-shirt, and always wearing house slippers or faux-crocs in camouflage.
Double-Phrase-3274@reddit
Thank you kind stranger.
No_Information_8973@reddit
For me it was 2011 and other than the annoying guy wearing a racing team t shirt, I could not tell you what anyone else was wearing. And I remember that only because of how annoying he was.
you_know_who_7199@reddit
Amen!
I wore a blue tie to my wife's funeral.
I don't remember exactly how people were dressed that day because everyone was respectful.
I do remember who showed up, though. Some things are more important.
OneHappyTraveller@reddit
This!!! Your showing up will be remembered more than what you wear (as long as you are respectful in your dress). A tie is a nice touch, and it doesn’t sound garish or inappropriate
captainstormy@reddit
Yeah, I've seen people show up in everything from designer suits to covered in dirt straight from work.
All that matters is that they show up and show love and support. Clothes don't really make any difference.
BookLuvr7@reddit
Condolences for your loss.
plainblackguy@reddit
\^ this
PhysicsEagle@reddit
Nowadays wearing a suit and tie at all is more notable than the color of the tie
dogupontheroof@reddit
It would be a problem if you wore all red. Half red on your tie is fine. Sorry for your loss.
Syndromia@reddit
First, Im sorry for your loss. May their memory be a blessing. Second, the tie is fine. You showing up to pay your respects is what people will remember, not what you wore. I mean, unless you did something incredibly outlandish and you're not.
Imaginary_Roof_5286@reddit
I’m sorry for the loss of your family member. It can be hard, no matter the circumstances, knowing you’ll miss their presence.
A lot of dress depends on where you are and, in many cases, the family’s wishes. I’ve seen requests for bright colors & prints with no black. Being in southern CA, very little is “dressed up” for, but people come clean & neat out of respect, even if über casual.
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Rastus77@reddit
I don’t even own a tie. If I showed up in one, someone would probably die of shock.
felixthecat59@reddit
You're there to pay your respects, not to win a fashion show. He'll understand.
finnbee2@reddit
The only time I wore a suit and tie to a funeral was when I helped carry my grandmother's casket. I'm 70 years old and have been to many funerals. I wear dress pants, a button-down shirt and sometimes a vest. I've attended the funerals of my parents, relatives, friends, coworkers, and students without a tie.
rshining@reddit
Funeral clothing should be clean, unripped, respectful (no logos, unless that's a special thing for the deceased) and should fit you (no wardrobe malfunctions). Color is way down on the list for important considerations. If you feel that a tie is important, wear the one you have.
Much_Box996@reddit
It is ok. You can even go without a tie.
dm021712@reddit
No one cares about what color your tie is at a funeral.
cdb03b@reddit
It is 2025. Wearing fully formal attire to funerals has not been the norm for close to 40 years. Semi-Formal is more than acceptable and having red in a tie is not a violation of norms considering wearing a tie at all is no longer a norm.
MmmIceCreamSoBAD@reddit
I think 'mourning colors' are generally out of style in the US for funerals and especially for wakes. With wakes you will often see people not even in dress clothes anymore and no one seems to mind. Especially if a person was younger.
If you're family you just want to dress as nice as you can. You do not have to wear all black.
Bright_Ices@reddit
It depends on the family and the region. No one will be upset by attendees wearing black.
Birdywoman4@reddit
Not all families are so strict with dress at a funeral as long as it is something respectful. I have seen people wear some beautiful colors of clothing. In those families it was appreciated that loved ones and friends showed up and paid their respects to the deceased and spoke kind words to the family. I suppose in more strict & tradition families someone might be offended by a touch of color. Hopefully with the last minute notice for preparations they would be more understanding.
ididreadittoo@reddit
Your tie is fine.
Jcamp9000@reddit
You are good. Don’t worry about that. I can tell you who came to my mother’s funeral but no way can I reach what they were wearing
verminiusrex@reddit
I wore a purple tie to my grandmother in law's service because it was her favorite color. Honestly, few people will notice your tie unless it has a giant clown print on it or stands out in some other way.
Sensitive_Sea_5586@reddit
Yes, it is fine.
Persis-@reddit
Wearing all black to a funeral is not really a thing in the US anymore.
Source: been to a lot of funerals in the last 2 decades
shelwood46@reddit
It varies a lot, but if OP's family came from an area where all black was required, bis parents would know off the bat. You're right, most funerals (and certainly viewings) do not require you to wear all black, especially if you are not immediate family of the deceased.
ShoddyCandidate1873@reddit
I was thinking that as well. There seems to be a movement away from all black. Many now have a dress code to honor the deceased favorite colors, dress style etc. But even for a more traditional dark red on a tie is absolutely acceptable
gigisnappooh@reddit
You can wear a solid red tie if you want. If anyone cares they are the one with a problem.
InconvenientHoe@reddit
Maybe it's because I'm from the American Midwest but I've never been to a funeral where everyone wore all black. And I've been to a lot of funerals.
TheFlannC@reddit
Conservative color, nothing too bold and colorful
Jujubeee73@reddit
Yes, it’s fine. A dark colored tie is perfectly appropriate,
Ill-Delivery2692@reddit
Wear the tie. Dress as well as you can to show respect. Make an effort. Better to be ovetdressed. You can always remove it if the crowd is more casual or you feel uncomfortable.
WiseQuarter3250@reddit
what you wear can vary by culture/religion. Or by request.
in the US, traditionally, you wear dressier church clothes or business clothes in dark colors. if possible, avoid strong pops of color, but if the suit is black, grey or navy, and the only other color is a bit of red in a tie, you're fine. But if you have a tie, in somber colors already, that's a better option.
Showing up is more important than what you wear, but do try to show respect for the somber occasion. Shorts, flip flops, and tank tops aren't appropriate except by specific request.
Lovebeingadad54321@reddit
I have a black and red tie. I have worn it to funerals. It is fine.
A tie with naked dancing girls, or brightly colored cartoon characters on it would probably be inappropriate for most funerals.
beyondplutola@reddit
My step father hated somber suit colors and was partial to his kelly green suit and Navy Captain Crunch-looking navy blazer. I showed up to his funeral in a light gray suit with pink dress shirt and bright tie.
Cacafuego@reddit
I had a great uncle who wore purple, yellow, and shiny silver suits with all kinds of colorful ties. He was a small town lawyer, and he really stuck out at the courthouse. I wish I'd honored him the same way you honored your stepdad.
beyondplutola@reddit
Did he work out of Albuquerque, by chance? =D
Hoosier_Jedi@reddit
My step-grandfather was buried in overalls and a John Deere hat. He was a farmer and wanted to be put to rest in a way that reflected how he lived. I have a lot of respect for that decision.
Sheetz_Wawa_Market32@reddit
You honored his memory. Well done!
cheekmo_52@reddit
I think as long as the tie is conservative, and not some kind of joke tie, it will be appropriate. I’m sure your family will understand you had limited options to choose from, if they even notice it.
nosidrah@reddit
The last three funerals I’ve attended have been totally casual affairs. I dressed business casual and almost felt overdressed.
Stray_Wing@reddit
I would not recommend wearing a red tie to a funeral. However, I wouldn’t stress it, they’ll probably just be glad you’re there to share condolences.
clearly_not_an_alt@reddit
I doubt anyone will care about your tie
PartyCat78@reddit
I was in a black tie wedding where a family member showed up in a polo shirt and khakis. It was the best clothes he has. We were happy he was there to celebrate. It’s about the departed (in this case). Doubt the departed would care or judge who came in celebration of them.
Razwel@reddit
A tie with a little bit of red is fine. Sounds like you will look neat and respectful.
PartyCat78@reddit
That is perfectly fine and respectful. You are there out of respect for your loved one, nobody is judging you. So sorry for your loss.
kmoonster@reddit
Funeral attire is very varied. I've worn everything from black suit & tie to tshirt & jeans, colored suits, suit with no tie, nice slack with button-up shirt (no tie).
It really varies by church/faith, community, the family, and/or other variables.
BroughtBagLunchSmart@reddit
If you were a character in a movie I would complain about the writing of the movie. Real life I would care less.
Outside_Case1530@reddit
Your tie will be fine. So sorry for your loss.
Giddyup_1998@reddit
I've never been to a funeral that someone has worn a tie to.
LaLechuzaVerde@reddit
It is fine to wear colors to a funeral.
You shouldn’t wear things that are excessively festive unless that is what was requested.
Anything you would wear to a job interview should be fine at a funeral if you weren’t asked to adhere to a specific dress code.
People used to wear all black to funerals but that hasn’t really been a thing for the last 50 years. You only really see it in movies now because it’s a context clue so an observer of the movie who doesn’t know what’s going on is being clued in that it’s a funeral or a burial.
More casual attire is probably fine too - a clean shirt and tidy jeans, for example. But a collared shirt, a tie, and slacks are absolutely a 100% safe choice. Yes, even if your tie is all or partially red.
Travelwhenever@reddit
Whatever color you choose will be appropriate. The family will remember your kindness in showing up for the funeral.
Ok_Individual960@reddit
Your presence is more important than anything. My best friend died from a drug overdose. I was the only one that wore a tie and likely the only one that came from a social status that owned a tie. No one looked at me differently and I didn't judge anyone differently. The color of the tire means nothing. Respect means everything. I come from an executive profession, he came from a blue collar lifestyle - I fully respected him and so did his friends, that is what mattered when I consoled his wife.
TheRealJim57@reddit
If it's all you have and you're broke, then go with it.
If you're asking for the proper etiquette, then it should be a black tie, and a black or dark-colored suit.
SomeDumbMentat@reddit
Nobody cares what you wear. being there is the j portent thing.
FuckIPLaw@reddit
About the only way tie color matters if it's not black or white tie formal (a funeral is not) is that it pairs well with the color of the suit and the shirt you're wearing with it. Match the tie to your shirt color if you can. If you don't know how to do that, nobody's going to be offended, or at least anyone who is isn't worth worrying about. You'll be putting in more effort than a lot of the other people there just by wearing a tie at all.
Substantial_Grab2379@reddit
The fact that you want to wear a tie is impressive and will likely be looked upon well. Not everyone can afford to go out and buy a new outfit for every occasion. People that know you will know you are wearing your very best. Those that don't know you, you really shouldn't be bothered by what they think. You are going to pay your respects. If the guest of honor at this little shindig would find it acceptable, you are golden.
SnooChipmunks2079@reddit
Your tie is fine.
Junior-Ad-8519@reddit
Maybe no tie tonight, but wear it to the actual funeral. Some people don't dress up much. It depends on the person who died and their traditions. This sounds nice and respectful.
QuinceDaPence@reddit
I always try to add a bit of color with the tie. Sort of to remind myself of the whole "celebrate their life instead of just mourning their death" thing.
Obviously you wouldn't wear some tacky joke tie but colorful isn't bad.
No_Angle875@reddit
Wear whatever you want. Wearing black drab clothes all the time to a funeral is gross
underhand_toss@reddit
Good for you for wanting to be respectful at the funeral.
Yes, your tie sounds fine. And, as others have said, at most funerals in the U.S. these days, "business casual" is typical attire. Dockers style pants and a polo. Suit and tie are great.
More important than the clothes is the fact that you show up. My condolences on your loss.
z44212@reddit
It will be fine.
Ties to avoid are festive ones, like silver and gold or really bright colors.
Jaqen-Atavuli@reddit
Yes that is fine.
The only time I have felt out of place, because of my suit and shirt, is at a funeral for a dear Mexican friend. There, you could wear a t-shirt but make sure it is black.
AnitaIvanaMartini@reddit
It wouldn’t hurt to dress up for a couple of hours as a sign of respect for this person’s entire life
DGAFADRC@reddit
Yes, a tie with red in it perfectly fine and respectful to wear to a funeral. Sorry for your loss.
Loisgrand6@reddit
Sorry for your loss. The tie you are describing sounds fine
Normal_Candle499@reddit
My uncles ex gf showed up to his funeral in a tight, shimmery, dress, with half her ass hanging out.
Youre fine.
Loisgrand6@reddit
🫣
RelativelyRidiculous@reddit
Sorry for your loss. I'm sure it will be absolutely fine. Anyone who cares isn't there for the right reasons and isn't worth your worry. The main thing is you are there to pay your respects.
BurlinghamBob@reddit
I went to a funeral and the deceased's grandson wore cutoff shorts. You are wearing a tie. You're fine.
It's okay to be emotionally overwhelmed. Don't be embarrassed if you are. Everyone else there will feel the same way. Some just show it differently.
1PumpkinKiing@reddit
Man, I wore a red and black tie to my dad's funeral. It's perfectly fine
Inside-Run785@reddit
I’ve been to a few in the last few years. What to wear really depends on the person, individual circumstances, and just that you’re respectful.
On_my_last_spoon@reddit
As long as it’s not a Chinese funeral, you’re probably ok.
effie-sue@reddit
I worked in funeral service for many years. I’ve seen it all.
It’s okay to forgo a tie if you don’t have one, or wear what you have. You’ll be fine.
Sorry for your loss, and thank you taking the time to offer support to the grieving family.
seajayacas@reddit
IMO ties are no longer mandatory at a funeral.
BobsleddingToMyGrave@reddit
You are fine
Neenknits@reddit
My extended family and most of my friends’ families still wear black or muted colors to funerals, following the old traditions. We all find it comforting to have, basically, a “uniform” for funerals. The day is different. Seeing a sea of black and dark colors of everyone there, sort of feels right. It suits. The day sucks, and the dark matches. Then, you sit around and eat and tell stories, and the guys take off their jackets, and their shirts are light colors. The women take off their shoes. And we laugh and cry and tell stories. It’s predictable. It’s comforting, in the middle of the suckiness.
Particular-Ad-7338@reddit
In Hawaii obituaries often tell mourners to wear ‘Aloha Attire’. I intend to do this for my funeral. I have plenty of Hawaiian shirts that people can use, and keep if they want. I won’t have any more need for them.
voteblue18@reddit
Yes a partially red tie is totally fine. I wouldn’t wear a red suit though.
Neenknits@reddit
It’s dark. Subtle. It will be fine.
May your relative’s memory be a blessing.
lisasimpsonfan@reddit
I have been to my Dad's best friend's funeral where everyone was instructed to show up in jeans and t-shirts or flannels. Funeral attire is more about what would have made the deceased happy in a positive way to remember them.
ursulawinchester@reddit
If anyone is focused on a tie with a little red in it at a funeral, I think they are being disrespectful to the deceased in my opinion. Showing up and being polite is what matters most.
Also, when my aunt died, we all wore purple as it was her favorite color.
AgathaM@reddit
All the women in my family wore red to my grandmother’s funeral because it was her favorite color.
ursulawinchester@reddit
❤️ ❤️ ❤️
Slytherpuffy@reddit
I have a friend who passed away and his family requested his family and friends near and far wear a St. Louis Blues shirt or jersey and khakis to celebrate his life.
Persis-@reddit
We wore Hawaiian shirts to my husband’s uncle’s funeral, as he was known for wearing them.
We handed out rainbow ties at my dad’s funeral, as he always wore one to church as a sign of his support for the LGBTQ community.
ursulawinchester@reddit
That’s wonderful!! Your dad and your uncle-in-law sound like they were fun people!
Persis-@reddit
They were pretty good people!
stroppo@reddit
Depends where you live, but the funerals I've attended (US) have all been very informal. Men don't even necessarily wear a suit anymore. And being all in black is considered outdated, at least where I live.
ChemicalCat4181@reddit
Yeah, I've been to three 4 funerals in the past 6 or so years and I felt very out of place and overdressed by wearing a black dress and they were for older/and or religious people. Navy is my go to now.
Academic_Profile5930@reddit
The tie sounds fine. One with cartoon characters might be a little much. Even that could be okay if the deceased was a fan and it was his favorite character that you wore to honor him.
seifd@reddit
Unless it's got cartoon characters or something on it, you're fine.
mahamm42@reddit
So very sorry for your loss. may their memory be a blessing. You may be one of the few wearing a tie, but personally, I think you should. You might be appalled at what Americans wear to funerals. I have been to far too many in the last year, and I have seen clothing better suited for the beach than for paying respects.
PCBassoonist@reddit
As long as it's not some sort of very bright, novelty tie with cartoon characters on it, I think it will be fine.
FishrNC@reddit
Your presence is more important than your clothes.
SkidmrkSteve@reddit
Wear what the person you are seeing would like. It's how you remember them.
InfluenceTrue4121@reddit
Oh dude, people show up in jeans and club wear to funerals. Don’t overthink this one.
FreeLobsterRolls@reddit
Red is supposed to be a no-no, but honestly I don't think anyone cares anymore. I wore a baby blue bow tie with pitbulls to my grandmother's because she always liked being happy. And I thought that it would make people happy. I was bawling my eyes out at the end. Anyway, wear what you like.
Slytherpuffy@reddit
It's fine. At the last funeral I went to half the attendees were wearing jeans and T-shirts.
ladymacb29@reddit
Yes of course. Wear what you want. Just not a joke tie or anything (unless that’s the request of the recently departed or their family!)
thackeroid@reddit
Don't worry about it. It's a formal occasion. It's totally fine to wear a tie like you describe.
roadsidechicory@reddit
Your specific culture matters. There may be cultural norms around funerals in your religion/region/etc that aren't universal. But in most cases, yes, it's fine. It's rare that it's still expected for you to wear only black to a funeral.
FelisCantabrigiensis@reddit
It'll be fine.
Being present to show your respects will be noticed, your tie will not.
SuperPetty-2305@reddit
At my father's funeral back in 2011 everyone was in jeans and a t-shirt. Nothing fancy or special. When I attend other people's funerals I just focus on looking nice. Im not talking like black tie attire just some nice slacks and a button down shirt. You don't need to dress like youre meeting the pope. Just no jeans and graphic tees.
Sparky-Malarky@reddit
The last funeral I went to, the deceased was wearing a t-shirt and blue jeans. If you’d known him, you’d understand.
NopeRope13@reddit
Clothes are nice. Be there for support instead. No one cares what you wear. They will remember you for forever if you helped them through the moment
TexGrrl@reddit
That tie will be fine. I'm sorry for your loss.
thekittennapper@reddit
As long as you’re not wearing a rubber duck tie, a pastel floral tie, or something obviously inappropriate, it’s fine.
Prestigious-Name-323@reddit
It’s fine. No one will think twice about it. I’m sorry for your loss.
FullmtlHerbit@reddit
I've been to some funerals where people were in jeans and a t shirt. What you're wanting to wear is fine.
tigerowltattoo@reddit
It’s fine. The all-black is a Hollywood trope. Dress comfortably and in darker colors. Your tie sounds fine.
JJR1971@reddit
Dark, conservative tie (not garish colors) passes muster and sounds like yours fits the bill. Office casual should be fine.
Intermountain-Gal@reddit
Your tie will be fine.
So much depends on the location of the funeral, wedding traditions where you live, if religion is involved and if so which one, culture, and the person being honored. I once saw a photo of a funeral where everyone was asked to wear a Grateful Dead T-shirt or a tie-dye T-shirt because the deceased was a major Deadhead!
I’ve been to funerals where I’ve seen jeans, biker leathers, bright festive colors, and everyone in black.
Unless there is something specific requested, as a man you can’t go wrong in a suit and any color of traditional tie, as long as the tie coordinates with your shirt and suit.
Hot_Car6476@reddit
Yes, wear a tie. Why would this not be okay?
Hot_Car6476@reddit
But honestly - it doesn’t matter. Wear nice respectful clothes. You should not have to buy an outfit.
tHollo41@reddit
I wore a brown coat and dark khaki slacks to the last funeral I attended (my grandfather's). My tie was blue and brown stripes. I think the fact that you dress nicely out of respect is more important than the color.
WalkingOnSunshine83@reddit
M husband wore a gray suit to my mother’s funeral. We didn’t have the money for him to buy a black one for this one day; he doesn’t need suits for work. I don’t think colors on a tie are a problem as long as you’re dressing respectfully.
Western-Willow-9496@reddit
May his (or her) memory be for a blessing, you’re fine.
my_clever-name@reddit
I'm sorry for your loss. Wear what you are comfortable wearing. Anything from khakis and a polo to a suit would be ok. Don't go overboard trying to buy the perfect clothes.
The person inside the clothes is more important than the clothes themselves.
At my dad's viewing and funeral, I didn't care what anyone wore. Someone could have stepped out of the swimming pool, as long as they were dried off, it would have been ok with me. (Speedos would be cringy though. Actually, I don't think my dad would have minded; he loved sitting by his pool.
geekycurvyanddorky@reddit
Can you ask other family members if they have a specific dress code? Not everyone requires black to be worn for the funeral. We wore Hawaiian shirts and dresses for one love one’s funeral and celebration of life, and blue semi formal shirts and dresses for another loved one’s funeral and celebration of life. Slacks and a nice, dark colored polo might be enough, no tie needed.
CalmRip@reddit
The actual etiquette is that only family members have to wear all black. For everyone else, it's dark, quiet colors, with no jewelry other than small stud earrings for women, and wedding rings for both men and women. I think that's in Emily Post somewhere, but as long as your clothing seems sober, with unseemly vivid colors that are usually thought of as celebratory it's fine. Your dark red tie would be perfectly acceptable
BookLuvr7@reddit
My condolences.
That tie will be fine. How you behave matters far more than what you wear.
I also recommend you slip a pack of facial tissues in your pocket if you have one handy - if not for yourself, than for people around you. Ime they really appreciate it.
Ravenhill-2171@reddit
Probably no one will care about the color of the tie. If you are dressed nicely you likely don't even need a tie.
PenHouston@reddit
A viewing is office casual in most cases. A funeral maybe a little more dressy. Ditch the tie for the viewing.
602223@reddit
You are fine whether or not you wear the tie! You’ll see as soon as you get there that both are ok.
forestfairygremlin@reddit
If you were close to the person who passed, you would know better than any of us what that person would consider respectful.
One of my best friends died in 2013. Our group of friends all wore color to the funeral knowing that's what she would have wanted. Her best friend wore a vampy black top with a glittery rainbow skirt. We honored her the best way we could considering the circumstances.
Honor your family member, if he or she would have been okay with you wearing this tie then wear it.
mooshinformation@reddit
You don't even need a tie, slacks and a button up in black/ dark grey are perfectly acceptable. ( Incase you bought a whole suit you'd like to return). The tie is fine too.
Evee862@reddit
I have never worn a tie to a funeral. Collared shirt, black, leave the tie. Only exception was my mom who loved the color purple so I wore a deep purple shirt in her honor.
Mustang46L@reddit
Dress as nice as you feel you need to be dressed, no more. Every time I show up to a funeral in a suit someone shows up in ripped jeans.. it doesn't matter.
cschoonmaker@reddit
I've seen people show up to funerals in jeans and t-shirts. You're being respectful by actually putting on proper clothes and you're worried about a little bit of color?? Dude you are good to go. Wear your tie. Pay your respects. You're all good.
brutaldictatortot@reddit
I don't remember anything anyone wore to any funeral I've been to, and there have been too many. This sounds nice, I'm sure it will be fine.
jay_altair@reddit
Semms fine, don't stress about it. The bereaved are less likely to remember your 'fit than they are to remember that you showed up to pay your respects
microbiologyislife@reddit
No one will care about what you're wearing. The family of the deceased person will be grateful that you came.
So sorry for your loss.
Glittering_knave@reddit
There will be people in jeans. Your tie is fine. Showing up is better than not showing up.
WeReadAllTheTime@reddit
Yes it should be fine. Most people won’t be in total black. I bet many people won’t be in black at all. Just dress respectfully and more formal than everyday.
odyssea88@reddit
That’s completely appropriate, don’t worry. If you’re still worried about it, leaving the tie off is also an option
IPreferDiamonds@reddit
You will be fine with that tie. In fact, you don't even have to wear a tie.
Ok-Concert-6475@reddit
You will be just fine. And my condolences for your loss.
StupidLemonEater@reddit
Definitely tie (worst case scenario, if you get there and feel overdressed just take it off)
Colored tie is definitely fine. I've worn a red tie to the last two funerals I've been to. Honestly any tie is probably fine as long as it's not one of those jokey novelty ones.
jessek@reddit
If the tie is a dark, conservative color it’ll be more than fine. Obviously a Jerry Garcia tie or one with Taz on it is out of the question but some red stripes wouldn’t matter.
Effective_Pear4760@reddit
You got it. No joke ties! I think all of my husband's ties are fine except the one with sunrises and the one with a computer and a small rodent whose tail plugs into the computer. I think of that one as his "computer lab teacher" tie.
cheresa98@reddit
You're wearing a suit and tie?!? I think you'll be fine. In my town (Tucson, AZ), you could be considered overdressed. If there's a surviving spouse, they will be pleased you took the care to put on a suit.
Personally, I've never heard the thing about "red." I'm thinking not wearing red is more geared to entire suits or dresses - anything too out there might not be appropriate for a subdued event like this.
I'm sorry for your loss.
Inspi@reddit
That tie or no tie and you're fine either way. All black is a tradition, not a requirement. Look nice, be respectful, and you'll be fine.
I've been to funerals where the men are all in suits, and I've been to them where nice jeans and a button up shirt are standard. Most of it depends on the family, or even the deceased's preferences.
Hoopajoops@reddit
You're good. Sorry for your loss
FrankNumber37@reddit
You don't need black for a funeral. Reserved, muted colors are the order. Avoid pastels or any shades that seem cheerful. Avoid busy patterns- stripes or plaids are fine.
pilfro@reddit
Its fine, unless its outlandish nobody will care.
Odd-Kindheartedness@reddit
It’s considerate for you to be concerned and to want to show respect. Without doubt, your tie work be appropriate; it was thoughtful of you to purchase new clothing.
Most importantly, I’m sorry for your loss. May you find comfort and peace amongst other loved ones today.
SusanLFlores@reddit
Your tie will be fine
Effective_Pear4760@reddit
The tie is fine. Im sorry for your loss.
elainegeorge@reddit
Red is fine. No one will even notice. You don’t have to wear all black.
edwardothegreatest@reddit
Yes
GhostOfJamesStrang@reddit
That would be totally fine.
Anybody thinking otherwise is just looking to complain and should summarily be ignored.
cholaw@reddit
Take the tie. If you feel like you need it, put it on before you go in
Bubble_Lights@reddit
I'd say it's fine if it's dark red. Bright red is attention grabbing and no one should be taking attention away from honoring the dead.
ToughFriendly9763@reddit
the tie sounds fine. Black and dark red seems appropriately somber for a funeral. I'm sorry for your loss
JoeMorgue@reddit
Unless you've been giving some other specific instruction, you're fine. Just show up looking like you dressed for a somber and respectful event and there's a 99% chance you're fine.
Itsjustmenobiggie@reddit
Your tie is all good. My sympathies for your loss.
realmaven666@reddit
it is fine.
Sufficient_Cod1948@reddit
It's totally fine. Most people won't notice or care about the color of your tie, or what you're wearing at all.
lkvwfurry@reddit
Yes it's fine
quietlywatching6@reddit
I would say it's fine, but you can normally skip the tie at funerals too, if it's not super formal.
Daisyhead_Maizy@reddit
First off, let me say I am so sorry for your loss. As far as the tie, it will be fine. It is good of you to worry, and it shows how much you care, but it is more important that you are there than what you are wearing. I was at a funeral earlier this month for a family member and people had all sorts of clothing on. My husband’s tie was navy blue, for example.
jpallan@reddit
Your proposed clothing is fine.
I'm so very sorry for your loss.
bananapanqueques@reddit
This is fine.
KorvaMan85@reddit
Yep, as long as it’s quiet/neutral/subdued colors, that’s the only real custom.
xiewadu@reddit
That would work at any US funeral/viewing/service I've ever been to. I am sorry for you and your family's loss.
ALoungerAtTheClubs@reddit
I don't think anyone's going to be focused on what you're wearing. But just skip the tie if you're worried about it.
RAbites@reddit
That would be fine. Except for upper class funerals, no one really cares.