Just like the trans phenomenon, open relationships are rare but overexposed by media and pop culture. Casual sex is always been a thing though.
Polyamory ends badly more often than none.
You always have a favourite. It's just pure fear of missing out than actually open love.
I understand I'll get downvoted for disagreeing, but I've been in an open marriage for over a decade. We very rarely date other people, but it's an acknowledgement that we could. We have, but it's not like it's a focal point to try.
The idea of monogamy is very weird to both of us, and feels like it's about basing your relationship on sex. For us, sex is the cherry on top, a nice bonus that comes with the relationship.
To put it crassly, I'll never understand 'someone else's dick was in your mouth, that means you don't love me'. When I say I love her, it has absolutely nothing to do with sex. Sex is just sex.
There are folks who can handle it. I'm partial to what I call monogamy+ myself - sometimes we do stuff together that involves another, but it's not expected or required.
I guess I'm the opposite. We're together because we're each other's best friends. All I want to do is hang out with her. We have shows that we watch, board games we play, and video games we play.
I've hooked up with a few guys in open marriages that have been going strong for years, like a decade. Both partners, in one case (though one of them more often than the other). Only friction I've seen is when I got kicked out cause the husband was having a stressful day at work and got annoyed by the noise, but wasn't even a big deal in the grand scheme.
Funny how this is a global phenomenum. I've never seen a open marriage that actually lasted very long (or a marriage that got open halfway trough a crises), and i'm pretty sure we don't live in the same country.
This is so abnormal to me. In Ireland where I'm from, its more unusual to see a divorce. Granted, divorce is only legal here 30 odd years, but it has never really taken off statistically. I think its a bit of a cultural lag, but we also tend to marry a lot older than average, which is probably a factor too. Fewer dumb marriages when you're 23 and barely an adult.
Probably. It also helps culturally it’s becoming more popular to realizing attempting to stay together and fix relationships that are to far gone isn’t worth it.
Yeah bro totally. Everyone should tear their entire lives apart because they’re having relationship issues. Cycles of shit relationships are way better than stability.
Idk id have preferred if my parents left each other before they started physically fighting each other. Ive seen plenty of crimes and other stories where people should’ve just left. Some fights just aren’t worth fighting.
The trick is just embracing gay sex.
If you're in an open marriage thinking you'll have unlimited women like your wife has unlimited men, you're in for a bad time.... But install Grindr and you'll have hookups before you even finish setting up a profile.
No, no. Let the man cook!!
This is the best revenge. You and Raúl, the power bottom, be havin a great time. Doing lots of guy stuff and he willingly splits the bill and demands to suck your dick later. More money. More head. Less headaches.
After a while when she gets run through by the local Chad's that don't want to put up with her bullshit anymore, she'll demand to close off marriage. Thats when you tell her that Raúl gives better head and she can kick rocks.
The biggest problem with open relationships is they are completely incompatible with raising children.
It’s possible, but always results in worse outcomes for the kids.
I agree, but only when polyamory is practiced by people completely ignorant of the tenants of how to know themselves and how to love others. Being poly is similar to being in the queer space. You will probably know if you should be there. If you’re not in it, be an ally.
What counts as an open relationship? I always thought if you're dating someone, that's it, you are 1v1. But I've been coming across a lot of ppl who think there's one more layer after that and you are supposed to also determine if you are "exclusive".
I think it just depends on your partner and your own idea of what a relationship is. Ideally you'd set ground rules and then go from there. Me personally, I think that if we agree to be in an actual relationship, then it's us two and nobody else, because if I wanted someone else we wouldn't be exclusive. But that's just me.
Same here, if I wanted something else we wouldn’t be in this situation kind of thinking. Besides, relationships are work at the end of the day. There’s no way I could devote the time and energy to another person outside my wife. She gets the lions share because she’s special and I love her. Nothing against anyone who’s different. I just really like my wife
I've never tried straight up polyamory or anything but I feel like it would be a lot of effort to maintain balance and honestly like the other guy said you'd wind up with a favorite most likely.
That's pretty cool. I can't imagine this working without mutual respect and respect for your partner's freedom, you see a lot of stories about people proposing open marriages to sleep around, and then getting mad when the other person actually takes advantage of the openness.
In my experience, sometimes people don't want to be "in a relationship" or call one another boyfriend/girlfriend or be beholden to the consequences of committing to a relationship, but still want to "be exclusive," in other words not casually dating around with multiples at the same time. I think the norm is exclusivity is a lower tier than being in a relationship rather than the other way around as you proposed. It's all different for everyone though
"exclusive" = when you start referring to them as boyfriend/girlfriend as far as I've been concerned. That rarely happens after a first date.
Though like others are saying, different people have different lines, especially if sex is involved before you get to the "titling the relationship" stage
If you ask someone on a date and they say yes, you aren't in a relationship, you're just getting to know each other and seeing if the chemistry works.
If you catch those feelings and its mutual then relationships start to grow from there.
If done wrong it definitely goes bad! Im aware of very happy poly folk, you can have open love accross the board if everyone is mature and communicates needs, wants and boundaries properly!
The problem is people trying to use it as a bandaid for bad relationships instead of making a good relationship more full and fulfilling, if there are issues in the relationship or personally with attachment, going poly will bring those issues to the light and set them on fire.
Thats the main reason it gets a bad rap, it can't fix a bad relationship but that's the main reason folks reach for it...
Read one of those askReddit threads about open relationships and a majority of the posts are stories of people finding out it doesn't work out for them. At least it seems plenty of people are experimenting with it though
I have friends in an open relationship, and it seems to work well for them. But also from what I gather they rarely date other people.
I think it depends on mindset. I think if you go into an open relationship because you want to fuck as many people as possible, you will be disappointed. It's for people who are genuinely not jealous.
Then again these are the people posting about it. I don't have faith in these sorts of relationships myself. But it does work for some people i guess, maybe if only for a couple of years
The open relationships people see are only ever bad press, and that doesn'thelp. Because it ends poorly for so many people due to a lack of communication and unmitigated jealousy rampant, any positive representation, however realistic/grounded in reality, is seen as unrealistic.
I've been in a polyamorous relationship with my wife, to whom I have been married 11 years, for the last six years, and I've been with my girlfriend almost four. We're pretty healthy, and we're all in good shape. I've been called a liar, told that my girls must be fat or mentally deficient, I must be abusive, I must have money (I don't lmao), and more. People struggle to fathom healthy polyamory, mostly because they are so wrapped up in locking a person down.
Yeah, like if we use the standard "Never succeeds from what I saw on reddit" (Which I often see when I stumble across the topic), well then mono relationships are certainly out too, and casual sex is certainly out, and we all are gonna die alone lol. Turns out, reddit has some sampling bias lol.
Yup. Both varieties fall into the same trappings, too: fear of abandonment, jealousy, lack of communication, and fundamental non-compatibility. People hear about it happening in Poly relationships and say "SEE!?" as if this isn't happening in many kf the monogamous posts, too.
I love my wife, and I love my girlfriend. The sex is like porn, and we have watch parties every Thursday. We are all friends and lovers. We communicate and work on how to improve our relationships and maintain stability. I'd argue that trying to make sure we do this *right* has strengthened all of us as communicators. It's beautiful. They're beautiful. I'm *EXTREMELY* lucky.
I disagree. I, and lots of people (that I know personally, or hear about or read about) have long and happy poly or nonmongamous relationships. Saying ‘x ends badly more often than not’ is true for almost any x. Is there any relationship where you can say ‘ends well more often than not’?
They just dont like seeing people happy. What they really should say, if they want to be more accurate, is that poly relationships between *people who were not ready* for the complexity of poly do not typically work out. Thats a fair statement. Its just survivorship bias, people who are in healthy working poly relationships dont feel the need to go around advertising it.
Now lets talk divorce rates among monogomous couples. How many of [the people in this threads'] parents are still together? Hmmmm
You know, trolling aside, I can't help but see the logic in these arguments, even if they are unpopular (clearly). I really wonder if monogamy wasn't the societal norm which side I'd come down on.
I truly think polyamory would be much more common and popular if it werent for puritinism, and the lack of ability of people to just communicate. The two biggest arguments i see against polyamory is jealousy, and communication. Which are two things people in successful poly relationships hardly struggle with. But honestly, after hearing and seeing the views that a wider majority have on dating and relationships, i also really believe a lot of fuckers under the age of 25 are doomed to die alone, sucked into their phones, little to no hobbies, no interests, zero communication skills; its sad really
To be fair, for people who only saw *that* clip where she explains it to Bobby, it’s not depicted in a positive light. Her talking about it and being in one is the butt of the joke and it falls apart. I said this in another post about the show but this kind of situation fits Connie perfectly, lack of freedom from helicopter parents growing up, not great confidence either, all wrapped up in being too proud to admit it’s a hook up dynamic because she has a bit of an ego. It’s clear Chane gets the good end of the deal with his “pre approved sorority list”
According to the American Psychological Association, approximately 40-50% of first marriages end in divorce. The divorce rate for second marriages is even higher, with approximately 60-67% of second marriages ending in divorce.
Same can be said for monogamous couples too.
I mean the stats seemed to take into account the amount of times someone divorced and yeah it's great it's going down.
I'm so down to just mind my business about other people's relationships. I was just trying to point out every relationship has its troubles and not just polyamorus or open relationships.
I've personally been in a polyamorus for years and know two other groups who have been going steady for 6+ years.(That is how long I have known them idk how long they have actually been together before that ) so I personally see it as an unjust stereotype.
I never said one was better than the other. Just pointed out the fact that people advocating for traditional marriage are delusional and that their system doesn't work either.
Divorce rates vary highly between countries and cultures.
Not that I particularly disagree with you, but that type of usage of statistics is how one comes to completely wrong conclusions.
I was mainly referring to the original comment, which just threw numbers into the fray that are completely useless ina vacuum.
There really is nothing worthwhile to do with those numbers without context.
The context is that the comment that you are talking about was replying to somebody who said a majority of poly relationships ended badly with no sources Whatsoever to support it.
Then, the person you are complaining about replied with actual sources and actual statistics to say that a majority of traditional marriages also ended badly. What is the problem?
That those numbers don't answer the original question in any way.
Its like someone claiming bikes are less safe than cars and then as a counter someone offers numbers about car accidents per mile travelled.
That's a problem with people who are complaining about the successful rate of polyrelationships with no data to support their position. Not a problem of the people who actually have real numbers for divorce rates in the United States.
Its both peoples problem because neither still knows if poly relationships are better or worse than regular ones.
Thats what I mean about people misusing statistics, which leads to completely unfounded "conclusions".
It's also useless to say that poly relationships never work out whenever it's mentioned. Maybe we just don't have to go around telling people "it just doesn't work" regardless of who they are.
It's not about trans people, they're referring to the narrative that trans people "are suddenly everywhere" when in reality, while they have existed probably as long as culture, they have always been a tiny minority
Right, and even in the show Connies "open relationship" is really just her ego putting a fancier title on a pretty straightforward friends with benefits thing/regular boots call thing. Which is pretty typical of your early twenties.
Spoken as a person who has spent a lot of time with polyamorous people. You have clearly lived the experience for a long time. Then you came away from it with a lot of insight, and decided it wasn't for you.
Thank you for sharing, so we don't have to go through that hell.
Spoiler: If you keep watching >!Connie admits that Bobby is better than husband material, her open relationship falls apart and they get together as a monogamous couple.!< The show doesn’t glorify these relationships.
It's also obvious that they are only together to appease their parents. It's less of a progressive statement and moreso an arranged marriage that neither is very committed to.
No, they grew apart because hank got a job in Saudi Arabia so they had distance between them. They also broke up in the original series long before it ended.
Yeah and they were 12/13 when they dated and broke up, it’s not like they had a super serious relationship. I know it was a few seasons but in the show’s timeline it’s less than a year of them being together.
I think Bobby should get over her in the next season or two. He loves the idea of her and since he works so much it’s easy for him to date her.
Although I think it would show more growth if they try and it doesn’t work out.
Also Bobby be out there having all kinds of hook ups.
TIL that commenting "So she leaves her childhood boyfriend to go off and slut it up, then comes crawling back once she’s used and had her fun? Typical." Apparently *isn't* typical incel redditor behaviour lol
Nah, that’s called cracking jokes. Insulting people and calling them incel because you don’t get the joke, or because you got offended, is the typical redditor behaviour. So is checking people’s profiles to make a comeback.
Which really is par for the course with Connie. She has zero self-control because her parents control her, but then she realizes that, in fact, they're right and she wants what they say she wants.
Connie’s parents encouraged her to date Chane, but she decided she wanted Bobby. She was dating Chane to keep up the idyllic image instilled by her Laotian parents. The last thing they wanted was her to date Bobby
I knew that seem out of character.
Connie always loved Bobby, also they both come from traditional backgrounds. Her continuing being poly wasn’t going to work out in the first place.
That sounds extremely King of The Hill and very much how I expected that to go.
Its like only focusing on the part where Hank tries weed in the 90s and not the part where he gives it up.
Two episodes in and it feels more like king of the hill than some of the later seasons before it ended. Again, I’m only two episodes in which isn’t a great way to judge the quality of this season but so far it feels like King of the hill is just…back.
Although I do find the animation incredibly offputting. There is just something so wrong about this overly modern look.
Thats the worst part, it actually is Johnny Hardwick. Its heartbreaking how poorly he delivers lines and how like, stilted and droning his bits are. Toby Huss (i.e. cotton and formerly Kahn) did a better dale than dale, so its sadly good he handled the more dale centric episodes (at least from memory)
Isn’t it the same voice actor for the first eight episodes and then switches? Because I was thrown off in the first episode but turns out that was the OG. He just got older.
Toby Huss (voiced Kahn and Cotton) voices Dale now since the original VA passed away. He does a pretty decent job, but it took some getting used to. The new voice for Kahn is probably the biggest one to get used to.
Yeah I’m not crazy about the animation either, but the ending of the first episode, >!where Hank learns about the Samoa cookie being renamed to be more respectful and says “Well that *is* a nice change,!< was very sweet in a way that only KOTH could pull off. More people should be like Hank Hill.
>!I just Google the Samoa name change and the cookie's name wasn't changed due the Girl Scouts trying to be more respectful but due to regional and trademark issues. The type of cookie the Samoa is made by two different companies that supply the cookie for different parts of the country for GS, one of the owns the branding Samoas and the other Caramel Delites so depending on where you are, you get one or the other.!<
And realistically Mike Judge (or whoever wrote the episode) heard about the change, didn’t look much into it, and when writing the episode, wanted some minor ‘social justice’ style change for Hank to react to, and remembered the Samoa thing
As a gay man, there is a bit of different expectation because hookups are more common and easier to get. There are many more gay guys who don't feel jealousy at all about their partner banging some twink once because it's super clear that that is not an emotional connection like a relationship is.
It's not bad to feel protective or jealous at all. I mean I'm in a long term monogamous relationship. But there tend to be more gay men, rather than straight men or women, who don't really feel jealousy about that stuff
\> Show is about the average life of a person in the modern day
\> Shows people engaging in things that occur in the modern day
\>"Why do shows do this"
We better get Columbo on this one.
I feel like this guy is missing the point. The show makes Connie out to be goofy and weird for participating in it, and later on Chain for being such a scum bag when she needs actual support, but he doesn’t wanna give it to her because he only cares to use her as arm candy and for sex.
The show is very clearly making fun of people like that, and yes, Bobby himself does engage in casual sex, but is visibly hurt when the women no longer wants to see him and simply used him for a sexual fling. Bobby later even turns down another casual sex opportunity because it’s not what he wants. The show seems to have a very clear stance against it if you ask me. Pretty openly mocking the idea of open relationships.
Anon doesn't understand Bobby pulled like crazy pre-time skip. Like they are just showing him continue to pull into adulthood because Bobby has always been charismatic and good with people. Besides Peggy and Hank, no one else has sex the whole season except Bobby.
My Anon gets no bitches detector is kekking like crazy right now.
Ngl. As a 25 year old dude who went to college. Yes, young people do hook up a lot of the time. Some more than others and less than others. But for me, I only hooked up with one who ended with fucking up my mental health with her shitty mental health. It ain't worth it.
If you watch the show, Bobby is uncomfortable with it and Connie even gets roasted for it by other characters on the show. Says she gets Sad Dick for being in an open relationship
I think it’s more common nowadays than it’s ever been, and it is becoming a norm in younger generations. The idea of finding and marrying your soulmate at 20 is not and hasn’t been the norm since like the 70s. Sex as an ideal has become more and more open, being less taboo. Not saying this is a bad thing but people have sex, before they’re married, and I think it’s ok to be talked about and commented on.
Bobby was always shown to be a confident, funny and charming guy when he was a kid. Of course he's going to be laying mad pipe and shooting thick ropes as an adult.
This is just showing how college is for a lot of people (who go to college when they're young). It's the time in a lot of people's lives where they experiment sexually.
\*Me remembering that Minh was a swinger and had mentioned knowledge of key parties. Also remembering that at college age hookups were super common as was sexuality exploration. Also also remembering that in the original run we had plenty of examples of Nancy cheating on Dale\*
Tbf they turned out to be a LOT more common than you think. Grew up to find out not only were my folks swingers, my friends folks and their friends folks were too.
Also the entire front office at my job.
My dad stunned me when we were on a cruise and laughing about a room with a pineapple on it. Didn't expect him to get it, figured he'd be a Hank Hill BWAAAAHHH type.
Ooohhhh, funny I thought it was a gay thing. I worked with this glorious old queen (literally his words), and he made funny suggestions like it was an insider way that you were down for dick in the butt.
The real question is why does anon care about the sex lives of animated characters on a fictional tv show?
The only opinions you should have about people's sex lives are absolutely limited to yourself, and the people you're sleeping with. And even then, you shouldn't be judging those people, just deciding if you care to be involved in it. There's nothing wrong with deciding that it doesn't suit you to be in an open relationship, but if other people want to that's none of your damn business. Lol.
Yeah, that's the thing you see, I don't think he wants to watch a show about characters sex life. It's pushed in viewer's face which is exactly what he's complaining about
Lol, that's such a sad way of looking at things. The storyteller tells the story they want to tell. You don't get to decide that. You get to decide if you are interested in the story. Just because anon can't get off his couch doesn't mean someone trapped him there and forced him to watch it.
I don't care for soap opera style dramas. So you know what I do? I avoid watching them. If I start watching a show and it turns into that (looking at you, Sons of Anarchy) then I stop watching.
I understand that some narratives are hamfisted into a story and often override the story itself. Like the moral dilemmas in 90's family sitcoms. And maybe this is one of them. But again, if you're not into it, literally go do something else.
Ok? But if the story is uninteresting shit, that's kind of his issue? You look at it from a very odd viewer unfriendly position. Also original King of the Hill was never like that, it wasn't about shoving personal sex life in everyone's faces. Natural what one can expect from show's continuation is the sort of similar approach to things as in the show before. If you don't talk about the issue it won't fix itself.
Ignore the rage bait and downvotes. Anon is wokespotting. Mike Judge figured Bobby, having been raised by Hank, would have an issue handling open relationships, and added it because he thought it would be funny, same as having Hank get confused by what all-gender restrooms are. Anon is assuming there's some "librul agender" in play when it's just a trait written to create conflict and interesting plot.
I would argue most of King of the Hill is about Hank responding to situations that most conservatives really roll out the hate on, only he just acts patient, understanding, and minds his own business. Like a human being.
Always has been. Remember that episode where he was teaching LuAnn politics and insisting she always vote R, but then his candidate has a weak handshake and the man has a crisis?
I can't even begin to take the concept of "liberal indoctrination" seriously. It could happen, hypothetically. But most of what I've seen for examples are literally just people being accepting of other people's lives. In a way that doesn't affect them at all. Just not being a hateful ignorant piece of shit is somehow a huge problem for conservatives these days. It's nuts.
Apparently this plotline resolves in the same way old KOTH would do it. Taking OP at face value when KOTH was always a show that explores wacky modern ideas through an old conservative’s lens is pretty faithless- though I understand why you would.
Connies open relationship falls apart as they all do and she gets together with Bobby as a monogamous couple.
That’s like hearing about the weed episode’s first half and assuming Hank’s just a stoner now.
There's also shootings and murders, super heroes and secret agents in every 2025 TV show. Normies make boring stories. You need some conflict for an interesting story.
Hank helped someone in need and didnt realize they were a hooker and was mistaken for a pimp.
Him doing normal person things and being mistaken for a pimp was the joke.
Yeah, sure, but you gotta sprinkle in the crazies. Consider the Simpsons. Somewhat normal family, but surrounded by people like Flanders, Burns, Disco Stu, Wiggum etc.
I wouldn’t call Hank an explicitly “normal” person, just out of touch and fairly naive. Sometimes those get exaggerated for effect (and then some) but I would say by and large the show is more about Hank being kinda backwards. He got a headless pig delivered to his front door and his first thought was “wow what a generous gift” and not that a crazed pork company ceo was vaguely threatening him and Peggy to back off.
Can’t believe my totally grounded in reality show *King of the Hill* would exaggerate situations like that.
Next thing you know they’re going to have Dale completely excavate a tunnel under his and Hank’s houses and almost die, or have Dale selling guns out of a bookstore Peggy impulsively bought, or have a crazed pork processor groom Luanne into being his perfect poster girl and wife only to accidentally kill himself just after having a brief moment of clarity where he realized what was happening.
Obviously a bit cherry picked but those are three subsequent episodes of King of the Hill. And technically, Pigmalion was supposed to air two seasons prior in Season 5, right after the episode where Hank finds out George W. Bush has a limp handshake and it shatters his perception of him.
I've been dating for about a year now, been on maybe 6 or 7 first dates and 3 of those actually turned into dating for a short while.
All 3 of them hit me with the non-monogomous thing after showing no indication that this was a thing for them early into the dating. It's more prevalent than you think, at least for me it has been! The popularisation of it through media is making more people think it's an option.
OP is ironic considering the premise for the original series was, "out-of-touch, repressed man confused and upset when the modern world is not like he expects it to be".
Open relationships are becoming a LOT more common, but still rare. It doesn't matter if the number of open relationships triples if it was only 1% of couples before. It's like Survivorship Bias. You don't know about most, only the ones that fail.
It does happen anon, I hooked up with a girl who turned out to be married but was in an “open relationship”
Glad I got the fuck away from that hot mess once I realized, it’s just not for me
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