I’m pregnant I’ve just started a new job. How do I tell them?

Posted by fleurmadelaine@reddit | AskUK | View on Reddit | 27 comments

Hello! In between accepting a new job and starting it, I found out I was pregnant. I’ve been there for 3 weeks. I’m ready to start telling people now, but have no idea how to tell work that I’ll be off on maternity leave almost as soon as I finish my probation in six months. It’s a London based finance company, so I’m really not sure how it’s going to go!! I’d love to hear from any women that have been in a similar situation, and how you handled it! Thank you!

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27 Comments

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FamiliarFerret333@reddit

How did it go telling them? How are you feeling?

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

Badly. Which is what I was worried about. I have had to move teams, and HR is very involved.

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FamiliarFerret333@reddit

Oh my goodness!! Can you share what happened? Are you ok now? I'm so sorry. I'm trying also and also looking for a new job. Scared of this.

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

I ended up emailing my boss to let him know, which was good because I have a lot of the records in writing. His reaction was inappropriate, and I think ACAS will be getting involved. I moved teams and now work with a lovely bunch and am very happy. This is one bad apple in a fantastic company. If I were to re do this episode, I would tell HR first and do everything on recorded teams calls.

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Sensitive_Road_822@reddit

I would wait till your further along personally. Make sure everything is okay and works out at the scans :) but ultimately up to you.

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

I’ve only really got one week to tell them to be entitled to mat leave so now seems like a good time!!

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Sensitive_Road_822@reddit

Correct me if I’m wrong - I thought you had to work at a new job for 6 months before qualifying for Mat leave anyway? If it will give you abit of relief by just telling them then go for it! It’s what works for you. I wished I’d left mine abit longer in the end because I got sick to death of people asking about the baby’s gender, potential names, future plans, breastfeeding. Heard everyone’s unsolicited advice and stories lmao. It is nice and exciting but definitely gets exhausting when it’s all people want to talk to you about for 30+ weeks. Congratulations on the pregnancy and I hope it all works out for you :)

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

You have to work there for 6 months to qualify for mat pay. Mat leave you have to tell them 15 weeks before you are due. Yeah, I’m not looking forward to everyone’s unsolicited advice. I was only planning on telling my boss (a man) and asking him to keep it to himself until I’m ready to talk about it. And HR. Thank you, so far every thing is going well!

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Any-Seaworthiness531@reddit

We all worry about things that turn out not to be as bad as you thought they’d be… In fact, it’s almost always the case that what you expect isn’t anything like the reality. It’ll be fine, just collar your boss and let them know.

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

Thank you! ☺️

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Any-Seaworthiness531@reddit

Also, everyone loves kids and should respect mothers. Good luck and I wish you a happy and healthy journey.

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

If only that were true 🫠 Thank you!

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alwaystuckwacrapname@reddit

Check your contract to see when you have to let them know legally. I know it’s tempting to tell them earlier, but in competitive corporate environments this can go against you. I told my line manager maybe a week before legally required, as a show of good faith, and because the team was going through so many changes. I was required to disclose around 6 months pregnant. So I was eligible for my company’s enhanced maternity package, by a tiny margin, like 3 weeks or so. I wrote a little mini-explanation, requested a meeting and notified them. I felt the need to clarify that I was still very keen to come back after mat leave etc, which was unnecessary in the end, but it depends on the dynamic you have with your company/manager. It’s a whole other ball game if you start to show early, haha, get ready to buy some baggy blouses and have your excuses ready for after work drinks. Good luck and congratulations!

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

Thank you! I’m telling them this week, we had the first scan today, as I’ve been feeling awful. My manager is really family oriented so hopefully he’ll understand, but I’ve come from a really corporate company that would have found the smallest reason the get rid if I’d been pregnant this early on. I don’t think this company is the same but I’m a bit jaded now! Thankfully I don’t really drink anyway so that’s not an issue!

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sweet-billy-pilgrim@reddit

It’s actually not such bad timing as everyone thinks. The team will already have a system for coverage since they were likely doing that while the backfill process was happening. They will appreciate the work you do to get up to speed while you are there and the knowledge that you will be able to step back in and hit the ground running when you get back.

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

This is true! Thank you for reassuring me.

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sweet-billy-pilgrim@reddit

I have this conversation a lot with my job. Congratulations on the job and the baby!!

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

Thank you ☺️

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LJ161@reddit

If it makes you feel any better my team mates maternity cover found out she was 5 months pregnant after 2 weeks at our company - she found out after going to the docs because she felt ill all the time. We still celebrated her pregnancy and threw her a company baby shower etc. These things happen!

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fleurmadelaine@reddit (OP)

Thank you! ☺️

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Horse-Upstairs@reddit

Just leave some positive pregnancy tests lying around. They'll figure it out eventually.

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knight-under-stars@reddit

I've always thought those planes that pull banners behind them are pretty cool.

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UK-CRA_97478194@reddit

If you're entitled to maternity leave, u need to tell your employer that you’re pregnant no later than the 15th week before your baby is due. Talk to HR around that time. If your work involves heavy lifting or anything that could harm your health or baby’s health then tell them a bit earlier 🙂

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SenSel@reddit

In writing.

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Craft_on_draft@reddit

“I am pregnant so, I would like to let you know as early as possible and discuss maternity options”

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P2P-BSH@reddit

"I'm pregnant"

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