ULPT Request: How do I make someone stop parking illegally without getting myself in trouble?
Posted by A1662@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 56 comments
There’s a guy who lives on the very first street in my neighborhood—right when you turn off the main road. Our HOA has a clear rule: no street parking. But this dude parks at the curb every single day.
His excuse? “The street is owned by the city, not the HOA, so they can’t enforce it.” 🙄
The real issue is it’s dangerous as hell. If someone’s turning into the neighborhood while another car is trying to leave, his car creates a blind spot or worse—a potential wreck. It’s like a collision waiting to happen.
So here’s my ULPT ask: What’s a creative or unethical way to get him to stop parking there without it being traced back to me? Bonus points if it makes him think twice next time he parks.
I’m not looking to slash tires or anything extreme—just a little neighborhood justice. Any ideas?
DingleBerrieIcecream@reddit
Remove the valve stem in his front left tire (one that he will see when he comes out to leave). Then put the valve stem back in when all the air is out of his tire. Repeat as needed.
Lemmy_Axe_U_Sumphin@reddit
Problem with this is if he doesn’t notice right away it could cause an accident that hurts him and potentially other people.
ibringthehotpockets@reddit
Uh he’s gonna notice.. you ever have a flat tire??
Lemmy_Axe_U_Sumphin@reddit
You check all four of your tires before you get in your car every time? Some people are amazingly unobservant and may not even notice the issue right away while driving. Not worth risking the lives of innocent people. Guy’s clearly already a moron. You’re overestimating him.
ibringthehotpockets@reddit
No but when you have a flat, you hear the rim smashing against the ground over and over again + tire pressure dash light + tire is visibly flat outside car + car is closer to the ground. Seriously though the noise is so loud it can’t be drowned out with music
Lemmy_Axe_U_Sumphin@reddit
I don’t know I’ve seen some things in my time that would make you question that.
Rhuarc33@reddit
That's vandalism and is a crime. Doesn't matter if you put the valves in back or not it is still a misdemeanor and the dumbest thing you could possibly do.
Lots_of_bricks@reddit
Easier to glue a metal bb into the valve cap and screw it back on. 😝
redthump@reddit
Piss disks. dog poop in the air intake. Just weld a pvc pipe across one of the treads. Ninjas.
Rhuarc33@reddit
Vandalism and a crime not just unethical
ibringthehotpockets@reddit
You’re replying “vandalism and a crime” to every comment like a bot lol. You realize what sub you’re on?
Rhuarc33@reddit
Unethical. Not illegal, what's so hard about that to understand?
ibringthehotpockets@reddit
Could you uh.. show me which rule prohibits illegal tips. A lot of things that are illegal happen to be unethical unfortunately
Apuonbus@reddit
Crack an egg into his air vent, at the bottom of his windshield. Better still if its a rotten egg. Other options is mouldy prawn water or some type of seafood. The vent there goes in to the whole car ac system
moon_money21@reddit
Any kind of animal urine. You can get it at sporting goods stores in the hunting section.
fat-biscuit-eater@reddit
I’m sure OP could get some human urine for free.
Khahtt@reddit
Ultra fine glitter works too
JonJackjon@reddit
Our city (maybe state, not sure) has a 25' no parking zone and any intersection.
Ima-Bott@reddit
Check city code. Some have a minimum parking setback from an intersection. Typically 30 feet
YouArentReallyThere@reddit
Bird seed applied liberally right where he parks.
Rhuarc33@reddit
Vandalism and a crime
ShoddyJuggernaut975@reddit
Speading birdseed on the ground is vandalism and a crime?
Rhuarc33@reddit
Yes with the intent to damage somebody's car it is and it has been prosecuted before... You think people won't know your intentions and the law can't get you for it? Get fucking real.
jeff_ewing@reddit
At risk of having my comment removed - you should go the ethical route and talk to your local representative about "daylighting" the street. Which is to say, make the first spot on the street a "No Parking" zone to prevent the dangerous situation you describe.
Thegrumbliestpuppy@reddit
This is the right answer. Though, as someone who lives in a dense city, the OP makes me chuckle. Parked cars limit turn visibility on every block unless there's a stop sign or traffic light.
KITTYONFYRE@reddit
yes, those spots should be daylighted in your city as well - regardless of your "density"
tarnishau14@reddit
HaHaHa. Depends on where you live.
KITTYONFYRE@reddit
no, regardless of where you live
Valpo1996@reddit
I always thought most states had a law no parking within X feet of a corner.
xxBizzet@reddit
I thought all of California has daylighting laws now?
As of Jan. 1, 2025, California’s new “daylighting” law (Assembly Bill 413) prohibits vehicles from parking, stopping, or standing within 20 feet of a marked or unmarked crosswalk on the approach side of the road. At crosswalks with curb extensions, this distance is reduced to 15 feet. This law is designed to improve safety by increasing visibility at intersections, benefiting all road users, including people walking, biking or driving. “Daylighting” removes visual obstructions near crosswalks, allowing drivers to see pedestrians earlier. This is particularly important for children, who may be hard to see due to their height.
ADisposableRedShirt@reddit
It's a revenue stream. Of course they are going to enforce it.
BusyWeight855@reddit
Lol. While California has lots of laws & and regulations, very few are regularly enforced.
PoliteCanadian2@reddit
Call the fire department. They went through my neighbourhood with a truck and put up new ‘No parking’ signs at corners because some parked cars prevented their trucks from turning corners.
ShoddyJuggernaut975@reddit
This is a good one, Fire Dept dont fuck around.
rdking647@reddit
take a small bb or pebble and glue it into the valve cap on one of his tires. he'll come back to a flat. he'll refill it and put the cover back on and it will let the air out again for his next return.
if he still parks there do it again to a different tire...
Nunov_DAbov@reddit
I always go for the nuclear option first - four tires at a time. Then he will have to be towed away. And don’t glue them - let them fall out when the tire gets refilled to hide the evidence.
Cannon_SE2@reddit
If it illegal then you wont get in trouble.....I fail to understand the issue herez
akacooter@reddit
Whole bunch of HOA bootlickers commenting here, especially the ones calling for vandalism. Just call the city and find out if the town/county rules for parking there, someone will come out and inspect. If it is deemed a no parking area then the sign goes up and all is good. If it’s deemed that’s it’s ok to park there then STFU and deal with it. Fucking privileged wanker.
adjusterjack@reddit
Anonymous report to the HOA with a photo that's timed and dated. Rinse and repeat.
The HOA absolutely can enforce it. Any time one buys in an HOA that purchase is a contract with the HOA that requires obeying the rules and getting fined if they aren't obeyed.
He may think twice after a few fines and the threat of a lien on his home.
ztfrey@reddit
You and a buddy get cheap ass beater cars and stage an "accident." Make sure to both hit his car if possible.
Rhuarc33@reddit
That's a criminal act not just unethical
MapleLeaf5410@reddit
Doesn't the city have a rule about parking close to a junction. Many jurisdictions have a minimal distance rule (e.g. you can't park less than 20 feet from a junction) to preserve sight lines.
Lopsided-Farm7710@reddit
This dude has his own ULPT and you're pissing all over it.
Pleasant-Regular6169@reddit
Nothing worse than cracked wiper blades. Coat them in vaseline on a warm summer's day!
stabbingrabbit@reddit
Spray paint the curb yellow.
BusyWeight855@reddit
Or red!
z1zman@reddit
Wait for him to leave, make the curb yellow, bonus points for fake hydrant.
Skeggy-@reddit
Tell the HOA. He is wrong. HOA can make his stay mistake
xShockWave420x@reddit
Oh yuck hoa. That’s about as unethical as it gets! Good suggestion.
COTimberline@reddit
My friend had a tiny little Honda mini back to the 80s, and we used to just lift it up and move it. We put it on the sidewalk, or on somebody’s lawn. We thought it was hilarious, him not so much. Anyway, maybe you could get a few friends to lift the back onto the sidewalk and see what happens.
FoxElectrical1401@reddit
It's not your job to enforce, Karen. I will leave my car there.
ride_whenever@reddit
Hitch up to the rear wheel and tow it into the middle of the intersection
himalayangoldminer@reddit
Buy a safety vest and 2 “no parking in between signs” signs and just put them in the ground. Call the relevant municipality and complain someone is parking in the no parking area. If it’s anything like my town, no one keeps track of the signs or communicates when new ones are installed but they love enforcing any ordinance they can.
Jarroach@reddit
They are parking on a corner? Just keep reporting it to the police and the fines should make him change
twistedbrewmejunk@reddit
So if the Home and street is in the HOA area the HOA can toss it's Karen task force at them and issue the HOA policy bs fines against them and whoever owns that house/apt until it gets resolved
if the location they are parking in is illegal (marked no parking by city or county with markings on road or signage) then you can contact local law enforcement or the city for them to enforce it.
You don't want to get in trouble so doing a late night paint job to designate it as no parking is crossing a line.
This is also an unethical advice channel so You could pay some kids get their bikes and or skateboards ran over file police reports let the por bastards that think they almost hit a kid know that it wasn't there fault and it was that idiot parking there causing a blind spot. Start a grass roots campaign like timmys board to have the city fix this issue and get the spot labeled as no parking officially.
Another option is setup a dog poop bag dispenser at the corner then also deposit dog poop near the area of the doors driver and passenger side.
madsheeter@reddit
Handful of roofing nails every time you drive by