ULPT For messing with a business bathroom
Posted by Chavesi@reddit | UnethicalLifeProTips | View on Reddit | 87 comments
Won’t explain the situation leading up to this, i can go in and out the bathroom with a bag (and do almost daily), no cameras. What can i do to a bathroom, to cause them a decent amount of money in fixing or cleaning. Not worried about getting caught.
halen2024@reddit
Orbees down the drains and toilets, works a treat!
LOUDCO-HD@reddit
If you want the damage to go beyond the bathroom, knock the sprinkler head off with a hammer. Note; the first minute or so of flow will be rusty brackish foul smelling water because it has sat in the pipe for years, maybe decades. It takes a long time before a sprinkler starts using fresh water.
In an office building setting off a sprinkler also sets off the fire alarm as there are flow sensors in the pipes. Sprinklers are required by code to have a flow rate of at least 18 gallons per minute. With typical Fire Department response times in the 5 - 8 minute range, factor in a similar time frame on site to identify the alarm trigger, then another few minutes to verify there is no fire and find the zone valve to turn the water off.
Best case scenario you could see 20 minutes of sprinkler flow, 360 gallons of water. The volume of 360 gallons is approximately 50 cubic feet. That much water would cover 600 square feet to a depth of an inch. It will flow out of the bathroom into the hallways, possibly into stairwells or elevator shafts, it will flow into the ceiling of the floor below.
Every where the water goes it will need professional ($$$) remediation due to the brackish nature of the water, it will present a health risk.
anti-Notzi_4Life@reddit
Well, in middle school and dew m-80s down the toilet blew the pipes and the had to rebuild the bathroom... if you wanna go hard.
Or you could just piss all over the place and shit on the floor.
Apprehensive_Hat8986@reddit
That one's only good if the employees are the problem. If the problem is the business/owner itself, then fecalizing the facility won't punish the proper people.
macgruder1@reddit
Throw some fish up in the drop ceiling.
nosmr2@reddit
Tossed a shit load of shark at a shitty apartment complex on moving day.
macgruder1@reddit
We all don’t have the luxury of spare shark to just throwaway nowadays.
nosmr2@reddit
It wasn’t a flex. My roommate and I had a neighbor that worked on a fishing tour boat. He’d bring us any extras.
macgruder1@reddit
I was kidding.
nosmr2@reddit
Ok, cool.
sirkev71@reddit
Opened can of Tuna?
macgruder1@reddit
That’ll work so it doesn’t drip out. Expect ants.
superiorstephanie@reddit
Expect maggots.
thesheba@reddit
Look up the regulations for ACA and state disability requirements and see if it violates any of those, then call the violation in. Most bathrooms have something in violation. They could get fined and they’ll have to fix it. Bonus points if it’s something major, like toilet placement or counter height.
toadjones79@reddit
They rarely get actual fines though. Most bathrooms have violations because code enforcement is very lenient and gives companies a lot of time to correct the problems. Most of the time they only really pay if someone launches a lawsuit against them, and the payout for that is usually very low (because inconvenience is not a high value injury).
thesheba@reddit
It would still be really annoying though.
toadjones79@reddit
Yeah, if you can get anyone to go inspect.
My favorite on here was the guy who bought quick setting concrete, printed off fake labels (even included fake msds data sheets) for a new overnight cleaning solution, sealed up a handful of bags of the stuff and sent it to a big box store with a return address from the corporate headquarters. It said corporate was trying this new cleaner out and they wanted them to try it asap. It came with instructions to put it in the toilets at night after close and flush it in the morning for sparkling white toilets. Brand new toilets are definitely sparkling white.
dirtymoney@reddit
I have heard of slimy lawyers threatening to sue for these violations ans getting a payout
redthump@reddit
Piss discs
tonymorow@reddit
Throw something stinky like rotten fishes around
redthump@reddit
Piss discs
rufireproof3d@reddit
This was a long time ago. I worked at a National Chain store that fired a vindictive individual. VI purchased some 5 minute speed crete. He then poured some into two brown lunch bags and rolled them closed, and stapled the bags shut. He mailed it to the store, with a return address that looked like corporate headquarters. Inside the package was the two bags labeled as "Overnight no scrub toilet cleaner." He included an instruction sheet showing how to pour the contents into the toilet at close. The opening crew was supposed to come in the next morning and flush the toilets, "For a sparkly clean shine!" He even included MSDS safety sheets to add to the MSDS book.
Tbh, we did end up with sparky clean toilets. They just cost $1200.
toadjones79@reddit
Holy crap that one is pure genius.
superiorstephanie@reddit
That is commitment. Love the MSDS touch, safety first!!
Formal_You6846@reddit
Bring in a can of spray mount (glue in a spray paint container). Spray every available surface. Everything will be sticky and dirty within a day and it's terrible to try to get off.
toadjones79@reddit
This is the one right here. Pure evil. There will be arguments and yelling about not cleaning it properly until a manager stalks off to do it themselves.
MacDaddyDC@reddit
Durham’s rock hard putty. available at every HD & Lowe’s.
metalflygon08@reddit
Soak a large sponge in sugar water, then compress it down and wrap with rubber bands.
After it dries remove rubber bands.
Drop small compressed sponge nugget down the drain as you flush.
Get the hell out of there.
Jeans_609@reddit
The craziest think iv heard that makes perfect sense in a couple years. 😂
soopastar@reddit
Why sugar?
metalflygon08@reddit
It acts as a binding agent that keeps the sponge compressed after it dries, and will dissolve in water.
So you've got a huge chunk of sponge compressed down to a tiny orb held together by sugar, and that's going to rapidly swell up in a tiny pipe deep beyond the U Bend when the flush water dissolves the sugar enough that the sponge rapidly grows back to normal size.
It will clog the toilet up bad and need a lot of work to remove.
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
Considering the extra large sponges near me come in packs, what would 3 of these bad boys do? also i’m guessing it would be best to flush as i throw em in
metalflygon08@reddit
Same damage if all down the same drain.
But yes, you want to wait to drop the payload until the water's swirling down so the sponge travels through the toilet pipes before it swells tot he point of getting stuck.
I guess 3 of them increases the odds of something getting stuck if the timing of the drop is off.
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
update for you, this gave me an idea, a while ago i was in a vacation and ran into my very first compressed towel. Today i randomly remembered it, and im very glad i did, very cheap and they expand quick.
CO420Tech@reddit
And you'll get a plumber to say "how the fuck did that get in there?"
metalflygon08@reddit
Use fun colors for an added treat!
CO420Tech@reddit
Flush like 5 of them, each a different bright color, so the plumber feels like a clown pulling scarves out of his sleeve. Fun!
L81heer@reddit
Easier than this is to roll an incontinence pad inside out on itself and flush.
Peace-Goal1976@reddit
That’s devious.
chaoticfox244@reddit
Tampons and pads. I cannot tell you how many times our septic at the gas station I used to work at would flood from those things. Absolute nightmare.
rational_actor_nm@reddit
Flush a credit card size object, maybe an old old old room key? A friend did this by mistake when a room key fell in when he was taking a dump. He flushed because it wasn't his house. Flooding, closure of the toilet for two weeks. They had to tear it up to get the clog out.
TrickyCommand5828@reddit
You want to punish the business, not the unrelated plumber who has to deal with it.
Upper decker or the old fish in the vents/above the ceiling tile is my take
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
The issue with that is then the underpaid teen employees have to deal with it, especially smell wise, atleast the plumber would be getting a payday
SchoolAcceptable8670@reddit
Clumping cat litter is a bitch if you don’t remove it all right away, plus it swells up like chia seeds and just gets awful.
-Bob-Barker-@reddit
All these ideas are so unethic.....
.....Nevermind 😕
librarianjenn@reddit
Low output as in money to fix, but super tight saran wrap over the bowl is always fun. Well, at least it was in band camp in the mid-'80s
BBorNot@reddit
Click and Clack did this to their sister, even going so far as to loosen the lightbulb so she really couldn't see it. They laughed and laughed. Those guys could laugh!
Glass_Badger9892@reddit
I miss those guys.
outtaleftfield1@reddit
All their old episodes are available as an NPR podcast
BildoWarrior@reddit
Take me to Taco Bell and bring $30. I’ll take care of the rest.
Morganhop@reddit
What ever happened to a good ol’ firecracker in the toilet?
ThrowingMongo@reddit
I wanna know why! Did they replace you with cheaper worker and make you train them?
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
i just go there, i’m doing this for someone else that did have a problem tho
taylinka@reddit
Is this a school? If it’s a school, please consider glitter bombs. The TikTok challenge years were rough.
Reason-General@reddit
If you don't mind getting wet, hit the sprinkler head with a hammer.
essieecks@reddit
Tie fishing line around the glass bulb of the fire sprinkler, tie the other end around a doorknob.
Subject_Turn3941@reddit
You could probably prop up a lit match in it, as a delayed fuse. Gives you a few seconds to get out.
alienheron@reddit
I grew up calling them piss flies, but they are (from the google) Psychodidae, also called drain flies, sink flies, filter flies, sewer flies, or sewer gnat.
Breed in standing water. Short life span but breed constantly. The sink will be infested, any open toilets, maybe even the drain. Might even spread elsewhere.
Sadly, easy to get rid off though.
stonkon4gme@reddit
Smear Dog Faeces everywhere - on walls, floors, roof, handles, absolutely everywhere. Leave no stone unturned.
UnfairNight7786@reddit
That’s just being a jerk to the custodial staff. The business won’t care.
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
This, i want it to touch their pockets mainly
ThrowingMongo@reddit
careful that sounds like sexual harassment
gerardkimblefarthing@reddit
Quikrete and a piss disc. Flush one and float the other.
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
Classic piss disc
ThrowingMongo@reddit
piss disk is obsolete. today we use fish disks
ftmikey_d@reddit
I have to say piss discs are the answer to a lot of life's questions lmao
Ninakittycat@reddit
Proper floating with liquid ass too
Ninakittycat@reddit
Add a floater with some liquid ass
MrLurker698@reddit
Destroying plumbing is not unethical, it is vandalism. Vandalism is illegal.
HenryFordEscape@reddit
It’s also unethical though?
ThrowingMongo@reddit
you have a point
amanuensisninja@reddit
I’ll bet your favorite salsa comes from New York City.
Chavesi@reddit (OP)
Besides the people wanting me to flush fire crackers or concrete, i’m not looking to destroy the plumbing, infact i’m looking for something relatively fixable, although i do agree it is illegal, no law enforcement wouldn’t even bother waste time finding out who flushed what down some random toilet
Abject-Yellow3793@reddit
Flushing dry cement will eventually lead to a downstream clog that will take a significant amount of time and effort to fix.
More specific damage, I'd need to know the layout of the facility to know what to recommend
amanuensisninja@reddit
Drill a glory hole, advertise it on craigslist.
Wonderful_Degree_431@reddit
Max financial damage would be to crack the toilet bowl and sinks so they have to replace them.
Wonderful_Degree_431@reddit
Tampon applicators are great because they float so it's hard to snake or plunge them and they catch TP and block it up and you get plausible deniability.
Someone once scrawled "fuck you" in their own shit on the wall of my work bathroom. Really got the point across.
hypothetical_zombie@reddit
According to my job, flushable wipes, and period products, are the nemesises of plumbing. So are paper towels. And toilet paper tubes.
FracturedFragipans@reddit
If you have access to women’s tampon containers, the plastic ones, flush as many as you can down the toilets to clog the sewage line.
dirtymoney@reddit
Hide a sealed thin glass jar filled with raw chicken, milk, eggs in the drop ceiling
Inevitable_Two_804@reddit
Bruh, if you’re really dead set on causing chaos, maybe flood the place with water — but lowkey, that’s just gonna make you the guy who wrecks bathrooms, not some mastermind.
Honestly, I’d just mess with the soap dispenser or clog the drains with paper towels — cheap, annoying, and leaves them cleaning up a mess for days.
But yo, don’t get caught, or you’re paying for it twice.
stabbingrabbit@reddit
Agar. With some locker room bacteria. SMELLS awful in i few days
SignalDragonfruit553@reddit
Whatever happened to the ole cherry bomb down the toilet trick?
INSTA-R-MAN@reddit
Baby wipes and tampons, flushing several a day will cause major plumbing issues.
multisubcultural1@reddit
Pop off the cover to the flush control screw on the urinal and turn it all the way up. Gets them every time, a single flush will usually flood the floor.
TheSagelyOne@reddit
Wrap fast-growing seeds (grass? Bamboo?) in paper and flush it. Or put it down the sink. Or both. It will mess with the plumbing and isn't likely to actually sicken or injure anybody.
Cuneus-Maximus@reddit
Cement mix down the toilet tends to wreak havoc on the plumbing.