I moved back home and I regret it. How do I go back?
Posted by Beautiful_8158@reddit | expats | View on Reddit | 23 comments
So I moved from India to the UK for my master's 4 years ago. My plan was to study and go back home... I'm an only child so sort of had to move back near my parents.
But after a year, I got a good job on the University I studied itself, gave me a lot of experience so I stayed for my PSW.
They offered me a sponsorship but since the plan was to go home, I didn't take it. I feel like that decision is the worst thing I've ever done.
I've now come back home and am extremely depressed. I can barely get out of bed. I've not applied to jobs yet and just feel so numb. I realised how happy I was in the UK with a good work life balance.
I'm 25 and my family is pressuring me to get married. I just want to mov abroad again, not necessarily the UK.
A-N-Y-W-H-E-R-E
But I don't know where to start. The global markets for jobs are horrible. I don't even have enough money to do another degree abroad. If I go, it has to be on a job sponsorship visa.
I've got business and tech background. Undergrad in Computer science engineering and Masters in Marketing and 2 years experience in Management,Marketing and business management.
Any advice?
Faith_Location_71@reddit
There are new opportunities for Indians to work in the UK which I believe Starmer announced recently - start looking out for those because they may be suitable for you.
Raneynickel4@reddit
If you mean the India Young Professionals Scheme Visa, I suspect the success rate will be very very low
https://www.gov.uk/india-young-professionals-scheme-visa
Only 3000 spaces and free to apply - lots will apply and i presume many will be eligible since the eligibility criteria is not that strict. Its basically a lottery.
OP fucked up big time not accepting the sponsorship.
Pale-Candidate8860@reddit
I know. When I read it, I thought, he had no idea the mistake he made.
Particular-System324@reddit
Same. Being Indian myself, I know many parents usually have kids as a pension policy since there is no state pension, so "sort of had to move back near my parents" already had me groaning. Spending all that money on college tuition and then refusing a sponsorship offer to rush back to fucking India, Jesus....
itsthekumar@reddit
Eh India is growing and also has a lot of opportunities now. Tho there is insane competition.
Particular-System324@reddit
My problem with India is not the job market or economic opportunities, although tbf I have no clue what it's like. It's the nosy society, filthy streets, crippling heat / pollution, overpopulation and general culture I can't stand. We don't know what about India has made OP extremely depressed.
SilentNightman@reddit
How bad to Indian parents need their kids to be there in their old age? Is it about $ support or there will be no one to help them w/ practical/physical matters? If it's about $ OP is better off going to UK for sure.
Particular-System324@reddit
Nah not about $, Indians abroad send huge amount of remittances to family in India. It's more about practical and physical support as well as emotional and cultural expectations. There's an unspoken expectation of "I raised you and fed you and took care of your needs, now it's your turn." Add to that the societal pressure (which is becoming less of a factor these days). The exact circumstances vary from family to family of course but that's the gist.
Outrageous-Garlic-27@reddit
If you are a yoga instructor or a cook, perhaps.
itsthekumar@reddit
Take some time to adjust to India then make a decision.
You haven't really said why India is worse. How long have you been there after the UK?
FrauAmarylis@reddit
This post breaks the rules.
DannyFlood@reddit
Learn the rules like a pro, then break them like an artist.
No-Opportunity7985@reddit
I don't have advice regarding your career, but I have a question regarding the reason you moved home : was it based on your own decision or did you move back because parents pressured you ?
Beautiful_8158@reddit (OP)
I was sort of pressured. I'm a girl :/ so they really said we gave you 3 years of freedom, now you gotta come back.
I actually regret falling to the pressure. Back when they were offering sponsorship, the market wasn't so bad so I always figured I'd move again if I wanted to.
No-Opportunity7985@reddit
I didn't fall for the same pressure as you, but my family also put a little pressure on me " we miss you " " when are you back " when I was having the time of my life in Australia and considering sponsorship, and slowly it makes me return home. Now I'm back home and after some time reflecting on this, I understand that this life is mine, and only myself can decide what I want to do with it. I don't know how it is in an Indian household, but maybe you should also consider that this life is yourself, and that your parents don't have the right to decide for yourself. Long story short, you will become depressed and resentful if you don't live life by your own decisions.
vipulvpatil@reddit
Single child here as well. Lived in US for 7 years, moved back to India for a few years got married and now in Spain on a digital nomad visa with my wife.
I would suggest look at other countries, Netherlands / France / Portugal / Denmark. Many have a decent tech sector and might have jobs that can sponsor a visa.
Another option is to get a job with a company in India which has a considerable presence in non US foreign countries. Most of them provide internal switching opportunities after a year or so.
Finally, you can take my route. Find a remote job and move on a digital nomad visa. A lot of countries have provision for the same.
Feel free to dm for more specific pointers.
Particular-System324@reddit
Does the digital nomad visa (and thus paying taxes in Spain, I presume) offer a chance toward residency and thus citizenship? I have a friend who is considering the same, he just got a remote job - but he also wants to get rid of his Indian passport so that's a consideration as well.
vipulvpatil@reddit
It’s possible. Google should help you find the details.
Beautiful_8158@reddit (OP)
Hi, I have DMed you :)
faulknerja@reddit
Time to grow up and get a job, I’m sure your parents aren’t happy you hangout in bed all day leeching off them. It’s not rocket science 🤷. Your complaint is you don’t enough money to do what you want and in the same breath say your not applying to jobs.
Pale-Candidate8860@reddit
Maybe considered developed Asia? China, Taiwan, Korea, Japan. You will have a good chance of getting in due to your Western higher education.
ehcadaeH@reddit
Reach out to the university and explain you've had a change of heart and are wondering if the opportunity is still available.
Beautiful_8158@reddit (OP)
I did try that but because the visa rules in the UK have changed and since a lot of universities are struggling because of redundancies, they said they wouldn't be able to sponsor me to move back now.
I don't think universities are hiring people on a visa either. I know a lot of people now struggling to get jobs in academia.