I’ll be 45 in 4 hours and 45 minutes

Schedule your colonoscopy! A lot of us our age and younger are seeing an increase in colon cancer. Probably all that purple ketchup, Surge, and Kid Cuisine. If Artax fucked up your childhood then it's time to schedule.

Also, I hope life is nicer to you this year and beyond. Weed out the things that bring you down and replace them with things that bring you joy. Try new things. There are groups for everything, walking, games, crafting, birding, ect. Slowly start a new normal that makes you feel good. Drop toxic people and family and replace them with people who bring you laughter and peace. Go for that walk. Adopt that senior pet. Mid life is crazy and Perimenopause is a cunt. I hope you have a good day tomorrow. Make 45 your bitch. Happy Birthday 🎂 🥳 🎉

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Least-Back-2666@reddit

Think I'd rather go skydiving and not pull the chute if I get colon cancer.

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Whole-Ad3696@reddit

If it's any consolation, I had to look up my own age.

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mrsg1012@reddit

Happy birthday! Mine may also be around this same day and time, but I cannot confirm!

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New_Stage_3807@reddit

Ouch

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swosei12@reddit

I’m in the same boat in a few weeks. For the most part, life sucks and I hate everything.

That said, Happy birthday! 😍

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karaloveskate@reddit

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CReeseRozz@reddit

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BurnerMcBurnfacer@reddit

Happy birthday. 45 will be better than 44 :)

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fuzzynoodler@reddit

But 46 will be, like, way worse

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Thank you!!

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Basic-Employment3985@reddit

Congrats. I been 45 since November. It’s been cool tbh. So hop in, the water’s fine

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ourredsouthernsouls@reddit

Happy birthday

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superfebs@reddit

Why does it suck mate

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Cause I’m a poor and I’m stuck in the U.S. and my paychecks are being garnished for $500 a month for medical bills I couldn’t pay, the transmission went out on my car and I couldn’t afford to fix it so now I walk an hour to work and another hour back. I’m gonna shut up now cause I can’t stop crying is the opposite of the point of weed. Sorry if I said anything dumb.

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badannbad@reddit

Ah man that’s rough.

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superfebs@reddit

Jeebus mate I feel you. Get this remote hug.

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Thank you! Big hugs back!

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badannbad@reddit

Hit it on the 26th and same.

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willgreenier@reddit

I bet your back hurts

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Of course!!! But … not as much as my knees

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GalacticFartLord@reddit

I turned 45 last week. I’m sitting on the toilet right now thinking about my stupid back pain. This shit sucks

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SpaceCadetEdelman@reddit

HBD!!! I got three more day.

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MrsAshleyStark@reddit

Happy birthday! Hope it gets better.

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Pretty-Article4871@reddit

Dm?

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MrsAshleyStark@reddit

Please cool it. Stop following me. Not interested.

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geekdadchris@reddit

Happy birthday, friend. Now go schedule your colonoscopy.

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BugEquivalents@reddit

I have a couple more months til I hit the big 4 5. I woke up extremely sore yesterday for no reason… it’s happening 😭

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Aggressive-Cut5836@reddit

It’s pretty bad tbh. My penis doesn’t work as well, nothing purely visual gets it going anymore. My eyesight isn’t as good either, maybe that’s the actual problem

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blue-eyed-zola@reddit

Welcome to the club. The best is yet to come.

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ExtensionCover3567@reddit

Life comes as us fast, man.

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The_Griddy@reddit

I turned 46 today! AMA

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this_knee@reddit

Come and see us when you’re 69. Until then … party on dudes.

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modernhedgewitch@reddit

Happy birthday.

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VinceAmonte@reddit

H A P P Y B I R T H D A Y 🎂🍰

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DirtRight9309@reddit

i’m sorry your life sucks and you hate everything ❤️ you made it to 45 which i’m sure wasn’t an easy feat so you have that and i’m sure many more things to be proud of

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My_Knee_Hurts_@reddit

I’m sorry.

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sacklunch@reddit

We are Birthday twins!

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Curiousone_78@reddit

Happy Birthday!

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TrinityKilla82@reddit

Happy birthday

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Somebody_Forgot@reddit

Happy Birthday! I’m a few months into 46 and let me tell you, the one thing you’re gonna want to kno

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Yes?

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Somebody_Forgot@reddit

Huh? Oh shit! Happy Birthday!

Sorry, I got high…what were we saying?

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Open_Pineapple1236@reddit

Four months and 2 days ago I turned 47. I wish I was high.

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aweraw@reddit

ladada ladadada ladadadada

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gummi-demilo@reddit

Get extra high for me because I’m not allowed. Stupid federal government

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pizzabirthrite@reddit

Peace be to your knees.

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Jasonictron@reddit

Happy Birthday

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GrandAffect@reddit

42 is next week. Cheers to you, homes!

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Fun-Bunch-4073@reddit

Welcome fellow 1980 baby. I turned 45 in March. Have a colonoscopy scheduled next Thursday. Ain't life rad?

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Master-Research-5933@reddit

I don’t do math on Wednesdays …: and you actually aren’t 45 because there’s 13 months in a year and you lied to him so you’re actually 45 minus one month for every year you’ve been alive but you know happy day and shit

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I_make_switch_a_roos@reddit

next year for me 🥺 🔫

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discojc_80@reddit

Tell me how it is. I'm turning 45 in a few months

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ezhammer@reddit

You all are so old.

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

We know

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Ok_Breakfast5425@reddit

Cause I got high, cause I got high, cause I got hiiiiiigh. La da ta da

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Ok listen, I’m trying to say thank you to all the kind comments but I’m too toasted and I’m sitting outside and I think every car is a cop car and I live in an apartment complex so there’s tons of cars and I wanna go inside but I forgot how to walk.

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alienacean@reddit

They don't think it be like it is, but it do.

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soneg@reddit

May I recommend you go to Athens, Georgia near the University of Georgia. They card everyone. Made my day since I was with my 24 yr old colleague.

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darkuen@reddit

I’ve still got a couple months til 45, the cope will be real.

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

It’s odd. I kinda sailed through my 30’s and didn’t really even panic at the big 4-0, but in the last couple years my body seems to be rebelling and now everything hurts all the time.

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Notredamus1@reddit

Happy birthday. Congrats on making it this far. I wish some of my friends were still here to celebrate their 45th.

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bitwarrior80@reddit

You beat me by eight hours, congratulations 🎂

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adolfojp@reddit

Happy birthday fellow 45er!

Yes, 45 sucks, but you get used to it, which kind of sucks, but let's look at the bright side...

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OverEncumbered486@reddit

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Thank you!

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OverEncumbered486@reddit

I hope things start looking up for you 🤍

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Flowerdriver@reddit

I swear I was 45 for 3 days then all the sudden I can't read small print up close. And if you're a woman, perimenopause is no joke!

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

TMI: Flo ain’t been here in 4 months and ain’t nobody been in that cave for years …

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sexwiththebabysitter@reddit

Congratulations

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Thanks!

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Burnsmoot@reddit

Happy bday bro. Hope you have a good one. Just a little more wise, that's it

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LegalBridge4107@reddit (OP)

Thanks!

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22220222223224@reddit

Things can turn around so quickly, even at our ages.

At 38, I was divorced, my savings were depleted. I rented (though enjoyed it). I have deeply wanted a family, but had no prospects for having one. I hated my job.

Today, at 42, I am married to the love of my life. We... don't have to worry about money in anyway, to a degree I never thought possible for me. We own my dream house and a rental. We have an amazing son (who is 15 months old) and have another due in September. I've received multiple raises and, more importantly, have an amazing boss, replacing my nightmare of a boss.

Things can change so damn quickly.

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