Hi there. I'm in the same situation but in a developing country. It's been ten years of hell that has slowly gone up in temperature.

I live in the US in my mind. My house is designed to look as American as possible and I keep American movies and music playing in the background. It only mildly takes the edge ofqff the very painful longing for home. The sadness of a failed marriage to a terrible person has nothing on losing cultural familiarity. I did not see any of this coming.

The worst part is knowing what my kids are missing out on. 

I have a nine year old daughter with Autism and ADHD and a seven year old son. She has been diagnosed with alexia and can't pick up the native tongue (despite being raised around native speakers her entire life). My son also very minimally speaks the language. They are both in extremely expensive private French schools (second language here) that break my back financially. Academic assistance for special needs kids doesn't exist here so most just drop out of school. 

He knows all this but doesn't care. His child support is very low but to him it's enough. He thinks that if I want nice things for my kids that's my problem. He was not like this for the first ten years of the relationship. Five years after moving here he decided to become a drug addict. He keeps us here simply because it makes his parents happy.

I left him last year and filed for divorce. I've recently gotten full custody and am finally allowed to get both their American and native passports without his permission. The next step is to get a medical certificate from her pediatric psychologist that we need to leave so she can get proper academic assistance in the US. My lawyer seems to think we have a good shot at relocation because she is still in first grade because I can't afford to put her in an English private school. The poor kid is exposed to languages that she just can't pick up but she's perfect capable in English. It's a disaster of a situation. 

These courts don't allow kids to relocate unless they need something their country doesn't offer. Their priority is child welfare and then parent-child relations. If the child is fine where they are, and leaving takes them from a parent and culture, they'll keep the kid. Screw the non native parent's mental health. Forget the fact that one parent is a dangerous drug addict. Never mind the grandfather with dementia trying to drive the kids around in his car.

If I were you and it's still possible, I'd get back together with the jackass and try to lure him back home. Act so in love despite the cheating. Sprinkle is some jealousy. Sign up for the long con.

How are you now? Have there been any new developments?