Inverse of the "Peaked in HS" post. If you're a fuck up who made it, let's hear your story | TheaterFire

Inverse of the "Peaked in HS" post. If you're a fuck up who made it, let's hear your story

Posted by Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit | GenX | View on Reddit | 205 comments

I tested as a genius in elementary school and was jumped ahead a couple grades. My parents were divorced when I was three and at 9, my mom moved me from California to Nevada. The Nevada school system wasn't equipped to handle advanced kids, so they sent me back two grades. I was bored and immediately developed a hatred for Nevada, the people here, and its trash school system.

By high school, I was a stoner, constantly having fights with the jock meat heads and conflicts with all but the coolest of my teachers, and dropped out of regular school my junior year. Went to a self-paced school for bad kids, caught up and finished all of my high school requirements in record time, and was done.

I took a trip to NYC to meet with an exchange student I had dated while she was here. We were supposed to take a train back and it was all meamt to be very romantic, but of course, she never showed. I couldn't reach my parents for some reason and ended up homeless and stranded in New York with an open-ended return ticket from Providence.

Unbeknownst to me, my mom and stepdad had divorced while I was in NYC and both of them just moved. Stepdad to Phoenix and my mom with her boyfriend to fuck knows where at the time. When I finally made it back to Reno, I was again homeless and had no possessions.

I spent the next 5 years doing more and more meth. I finally ended up at a strip club on Chrisgmas Eve and was so scrungy, even the D-Team strippers wouldn't talk to me, so I decided to make a change.

I spent a year cleaning up and recovering enough to get steady and then two years getting an AA, which I discovered to be worthless. I spent the next 15 years working seasonally as an arborist, wildland firefighter, and ski resort worker. I picked up a BA on the way. In 2016, I was aged out of wildland fire and freaked out about approaching middle age with no benefits. I got an administrative job with the State, got my MA from a prestigious east coast Ivy (admitted almost solely on the basis of my entrance exam scores) and now I'm a professional counselor pulling in just shy of $100k a year (though not with the State).

I've never been to a class reunion and technically, don't think I'm invited seeing as I dropped out. I'm not sure I'd want to go even if I were invited, but part of me would like to gloat.

Let's hear it for and from the losers who were told they'd never make it and still beat the odds.

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GrumpySnarf@reddit

I was a punk/goth weirdo and made fun of for that. The people who made fun of me still live in the same shitty small town working in gas stations, factories, DMV, etc. Nothing wrong with that so I left two immediately after turning 18. Now I am a psychiatric ARNP making decent money, love my job, have a great house in a beautiful large city, awesome husband, living my best life. It's not perfect but I am really happy with how far I've come with no help from family.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Right on!

I lived in a squat for a time and one of the guys I lived with stole all of my things and left the day we had to pay our "rent" and I was kicked out.

Some years later, after I started my counseling internship, I saw him working as a security guard at the DMV. It felt like vindication.

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GrumpySnarf@reddit

HAHAHA!

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Over_The_Influencer@reddit

I was placed in foster care at nine months. I was in seven different homes and emancipated at seventeen. I was made fun of and bullied relentlessly. No one cared if I amounted to anything or even believed that I had the ability. I was 30 when I realized the only regret I had was not believing in myself enough to get an education. I started at community college that year, and 7 years later, I was graduating from medical school. The first in my family to earn a degree.

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Primary-Cattle-636@reddit

This gave me goosebumps. You should be very proud of yourself.

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Over_The_Influencer@reddit

Thank you. I share my story whenever I can, I hope it inspires someone else who was told their entire life they were trash. Anyone can change their life, It starts with you believing in yourself. 🖤

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T_Noctambulist@reddit

If you were in foster care how do you know you're the first in your family to earn a degree?

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Last_Spare@reddit

Not sure why the downvotes, this is a fair question.

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Over_The_Influencer@reddit

I was in foster care, not an orphanage, lol

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Last_Spare@reddit

Thanks for sharing and many congrats to you !

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Over_The_Influencer@reddit

Do you think foster care means you are an orphan with no knowledge of your family??? Im going to have lunch with my sister tomorrow. My mom had three kids after me that she raised, the family court system is fucked up.

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SasquatchIsMyHomie@reddit

Holy shit, that’s amazing! Way to go!

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Seventh7Sun@reddit

It really is amazing.

My understanding is that roughly 50% of the homeless in the US are products of the foster care system, which makes this simply incredible.

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Over_The_Influencer@reddit

I think about that a lot. I was 17 in the 90's!! There is absolutely no way I would have been able to do the same now. I had a two bedroom apartment for $320. The state paid for it until I was 18, and then I got a roommate.

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FeralBanshee@reddit

Fuck yes!!!!

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lingonberryboop@reddit

Amazing. I'm so proud of you.

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PowerfulMind4273@reddit

Wonderful! Thank you for sharing!

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spacemusicisorange@reddit

That’s wonderful! I don’t know you, but I feel proud of you!!!

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HillbillyEEOLawyer@reddit

gif

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DonkyHotayDeliMunchr@reddit

I love this. Congrats, doc!!

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tomjulio@reddit

At graduation, my high school guidance counselor literally told me I could become "a good roofer." In my blessed life I have been a nuclear power Engineer, a cyber-security analyst, worked in the music industry, a national forest ranger, and now going for a doctorate in art therapy. Maybe that mother fucker back then was playing 4d chess with me to motivate me so I WOULD'NT become a roofer? Hmmm.

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Beegkitty@reddit

Where were these guidance counselors in school? I never met with one, didn't know they existed at all. No one told me what they thought I would I could / would be as an adult.

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TinyNJHulk@reddit

On the opposite side of gc's, mine could tell from my apparent attitude that I had a juicy story that she just needed to know about. Not to help with, but to get the gossip. After a school assembly she sat me down and pushed and pushed until I cracked until I blurted out the big secret she was after. Not what she was expecting and authorities etc needed to be called in as a mandated reporter.

In the long run I appreciated the help but her method was bullshit torture, and I've never forgiven her for that.

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Beegkitty@reddit

I am sorry she went in with ill intent but glad that she actually did her job and reported.

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TinyNJHulk@reddit

You're definitely right, she could have just left me there crying after getting what she wanted. The fallout sucked and things still haunt me from time to time, but I'm thankful that the abuser and the enabler got called out and had to face the damage they did ❤️

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kjmacsu2@reddit

I saw mine once and she told me to look in the mirror, that I could get a rich man and didn't need college lol God I'm glad times are changing.

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Beegkitty@reddit

My grandfather told me I didn't need science or math because of the same reason! He said my future husband would take care of everything for me. Yikes! I thought he was the only one that could say something that stupid.

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Neener216@reddit

This has seriously always been my question. What on earth do they do all day? I met my guidance counselor ONCE, for a grand total of ten minutes, during which she looked over some of my tests scores and made a few suggestions about schools I might want to apply to (none of them would have been appropriate for a host of different reasons).

Why aren't they hanging out in the cafeteria while the kids are eating lunch? Why aren't they making any kind of effort to get to know kids BEFORE a problem arises? It's very mysterious.

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O_o-22@reddit

May have depended on the size of your school too. I think there was around 450-500 kids in my graduating class and 4 guidance counselors for the entire school. Those counselors were for all 4 grades and those ones coming up behind me had more students per grade. So I think they were stretched a bit thin.

I went to the career center once and did some testing and it came up with 3 careers. Jeweler (which I did go to school for and became one for 6 years before burning out on that) chef (no idea why it came up with that tho I have worked In restaurants a lot I never what I’d consider “chef”) and architect (that might have worked out but I switched out of architectural drafting in freshman year because I wanted to take art classes).

I don’t recall having more than one of two meetings with that counselor and am a bit miffed that I was always pushed towards college and not told anything about the vocational classes I could have taken at a different campus because those were for non college track kids. Almost everyone I knew that went that route is doing better than the college track kids and had their work life set up much sooner than the college kids too.

We were the first Gen past college educated boomers and for them college was how you dug out of a lower class and into the middle class and it was affordable for them. It was getting unaffordable for us tho that also depended on where you went. State colleges were still affordable and I was lucky enough that my parents had set money aside, I didn’t graduate with any loans. But that push towards college is why the trades were understaffed and there is now a push in the opposite direction to get people into the trades.

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Neener216@reddit

Totally agree that it's a major disservice to the entire population that trades aren't valued and promoted in most high schools!

And FWIW, I went to a NYC public school - there were 700 students in my graduating class, with at least a half-dozen guidance counselors. I too once believed that might have been the issue - but my son attended a top public school in a swanky suburb with a total of about 130 students in his class and four guidance counselors, and he only met with his counselor once as well.

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Arkhamina@reddit

I was stuck in 'Group' with them, at least at my school, they doubled as some sort of weird therapy role. My mom (only family) was terminally ill and I had 'acted out' yelling at an entitled girl bitching about her mom. It was not helpful, it was embarrassing to be pulled from class. We just bitched about waking up for school while working, and about stupid kids, and we're not actually given any tools to succeed.

My math teacher on her own, and a 'parateacher' who did grading did far more to help me. The math teacher would let me stay later, and give me a ride home, since our affluent district didn't run any later busses as mommy or daddy could do that.

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newwriter365@reddit

My guidance counselor had been a guidance counselor since my parents were students at the high school.

The only meeting I had with him was when I tried to file paperwork to graduate after three years (I needed to take one, six-week class in summer school to finish). He REQUIRED a meeting with me and my parents.

My dad (a self-made, local (blue collar)business co- owner with my uncle) went with me. Counselor went on and on about how I would be missing out on scholarships for college (what? I was a B+ student, stopped doing extracurricular activities after sophomore year because I got a job). No other reason for me to stay another year was provided.

My father signed the paperwork before we walked out of the office.

I went on to earn an AA, BS, and two Masters degrees. I paid for each degree myself.

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in_a_cloud@reddit

Our were useless

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Routine_Mood3861@reddit

They seemed to triage out those of us whom they deemed were “lost causes”, and gravitated towards the students who already had their shit together at 16 and 17.

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Objective-Lab5179@reddit

I always felt that I shouldn't take career advice from someone who couldn't do better than a high school guidance counselor. And I don't mean to belittle them, but my experiences with them have never been positive.

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Sea-Fix-293@reddit

My roofer friend just retired with $10m at 55 or so. Certainly can be good :)

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Imeanwhybother@reddit

Michelle Obama's HS guidance counselor told her she "wasn't Princeton material." Maybe yours just sucked, too.

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nvr2manydogs@reddit

Jimmy Buffett's take on high school counselors:

"Never wanted to be a part of history I have my days in the sun, a beach bum, a man for all seasides Guidance counselor said, "Your scores are anti-heroic. Computer recommends: hard-drinking calypso poet."

Turns out there was a market for the hard-drinking Calypso poet (even if the hard-drinking part got somewhat tamed in the end).

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Pretentious-Nonsense@reddit

I was told I would excel working retail jobs.

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BabadookOfEarl@reddit

One always has to bear in mind that the best a guidance counselor could become is a guidance counselor. And even then, not by design. Nobody dreams of being a guidance counselor.

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Brandigandor@reddit

Homer, is that you?

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tomjulio@reddit

Trust me, being in the nuclear field in the early 90s when the Simpsons were at it's peak, we heard that non-stop ...and the cartoon wasn't too far off from reality!

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Mandoleeragain@reddit

I got rejected from a non-credentialed, continuing education certificate course at a university. Made me so mad that I went and got my MBA at a different university!

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scarybottom@reddit

So- I did well in HS academically (we were from the wrong side of the tracks so this made my HS guidance counselor VERY upset in a very small town- I was NOT supposed to out perform the kids from the "right" families).

But I certainly did NOT peak in High school. Anyone who did? Is a boring loser.

We can and should all be finding joy and adventure and doing cool shit no matter our age.

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Far_Winner5508@reddit

Only went to my 10 year reunion in ‘95. All the jocks were some kind of salesmen (car/i surance/vitamins) in cheap suits.

I showed up unemployed, with a mohawk, living out of my car, wearing a Hawaiian shirt and sandles (it was at hotel on the beach: wut?). Learned there had ben an active agreement among my friends, the guys I’d known since first grade, to make sure I never heard about any parties or anything going on outside of school the entire 4 years. Nice to learn I was the school pariah.

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Relevant-Package-928@reddit

I was told I'd make a good artist or long haul truck driver. 😂

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NeighborhoodNo4274@reddit

They told me I should go to law school, but instead I became an artist and a truck driver (although not long haul.)

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Relevant-Package-928@reddit

Maybe our results got mixed up. I would have been a horrible tattoo artist and I'm not especially fond of driving. 😂

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North_Key80@reddit

I fricking love this.

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thecrystalcrow@reddit

We had these occupational tests, and my results were bricklayer and FBI agent. I ended up in traffic engineering via radio disc jockey, bartender, retail management, and real estate. XD

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EitherHighlight5986@reddit

That test said I should be a forest ranger! I'm allergic to most of nature and not outdoorsy at all.

I've been a librarian and a lawyer. Enjoyed both. Now I teach undergraduate and graduate courses in business law, which I also enjoy. No nature involved.

Traffic engineering sounds really fascinating. My husband used to work in retail management - I'm sure you could trade some good stories about crazy customers.

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zornmagron@reddit

nothing like motivation from someone to change a course.. I had a "buddy" once that said I would die in the small town we grew up in. Left at 21 and never looked back have traveled a lot of the world with more to come. thanks old buddy I hope you got out too...

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

fuckin a. These are the stories I want.

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AnneAlytical@reddit

I am the adult child of a 15-year-old mom and dad. Both addicts, married and divorced before I was 1.

Grew up in poverty - food stamps, regularly getting evicted, dad wasn't around.

I wasn't the fuck up, but I wasn't stellar. I skirted all of the lines - sex and drugs in high school, moved in with my boyfriend at 16 (he was 18). Graduated as a C-D student. Wasted lots of potential! Got my Associate's in accounting from a very expensive diploma mill. No one talks about how expensive it is to be poor and ignorant.

Married that guy, bought a house we couldn't afford, had 1 kid, lost the house, filed for bankruptcy, and got divorced.

Finally got a good adult-type job at 28. Worked hard, repaired my credit, made nice with the ex to co-parent, and raised my son with the love, care, and respect I never got. He has never gone without. He has always had his own bed, food, and medical care.

I'm 47 now. My son is a certified mechanic, and has a good, healthy relationship with his long-time girlfriend. I bought a house on my own in 2017.

As of today, I'm 5 classes from finishing my Bachelor's degree in Finance (from a real school!). I'm respected in my field and relationships as someone reliable.

Also, I'm not an addict. Big win for the family line!

I don't think I have peaked yet. Each year gets better.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Finish strong! You can do 5 classes standing on your head. Congratulations on making it up the hill. Every hill pay its debt.

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mad_spreadsheets_yo@reddit

home life was difficult. youngest of 3 to a narcissistic single mother. my oldest sister is smart and good at everything, middle sister worked hard and was diligent and succeeded. I was smart enough to ace all the tests but dumb enough to not do any of the assignments. it was wild. I barely graduated but got 1300 on the SAT. that's not genius level, but also pretty competitive.

once I was done with high school I was forced out. my mother was done being a parent and that was that. I dropped out of college because I was failing classes (didn't do the work) and didn't have the money to continue. I was working retail and server jobs until I started at a company in their call center.

I worked my way up and was there for 17 years. in that time, I traveled to 5 continents, lived abroad for more than a decade, gained a ton of business experience. and was mentored by someone who noticed me and gave me the tough guidance I needed.

now I make enough to be considered upper middle class. HCOL area. houses in different countries, etc. still no degree.

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imhere_4_beer@reddit

Wow we have super similar stories, especially around schooling and parenting. I was the oldest, taking care of the younger, got myself pregnant at 17, and fell into call centers when I was 18 because I also got chucked out of the house. Moved all the way up, then got recruited over to the brand side in my 30s, got sucked into a start up in my 40s, managed to reach VP level somehow, and now I earn a salary that I couldn’t even imagine as a kid.

When people ask me what I do, I just say “customer service” and sometimes you see them immediately check out and look for someone more important or interesting to talk to. It cracks me up.

I just quit my job and at the end of the month, I’m cashing in some IPO stock to do… I have no idea. I’m just gonna hang out for a while and see what happens. Also still no degree.

I never could have imagined my life would turn out like this. I’m proud of us!!!

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mad_spreadsheets_yo@reddit

this is scarily similar! however it looks like you've always been the responsible type. I had to grow up on the fly. I guess it took me a while to learn that lesson.

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imhere_4_beer@reddit

Ha you must have missed the pregnant at 17 part. Life was a mess for a long time but we got it together!

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deadbeef4@reddit

> I was smart enough to ace all the tests but dumb enough to not do any of the assignments.

Are you me?

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keepcalmdude@reddit

No, they’re me

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Well done!

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mad_spreadsheets_yo@reddit

well done to you! I'm glad you figured it all out!

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HillbillyEEOLawyer@reddit

Damn, I did well in high school, excelled in college and grad school. Became a lawyer who has achieved a lot professionally and have had my own practice for 20 years, but you and u/Reginald_Sockpuppet make me feel like I should have done more! Congrats to you both on your achievements!

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mad_spreadsheets_yo@reddit

I envy your drive and dedication. well done to you!

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crazyxgerman@reddit

I was kind of a loner in high school, didn't get invited to the parties, an odd ball, metal head, didn't understand how life works, no motivation, didn't really give a shit about anything other than playing drums, smoking and drinking, barely graduated high school with a shit GPA, zero life ambition, worked in a bank but hated it, went to college but hated it and dropped out, my dad was a narcissistic sociopath who didn't really give a shit about me... You get the idea.

Moved to California, worked stupid odd jobs, then got a temp to hire entry level tech support job where I discovered my passion for computers. Worked my way up through IT, network security, enterprise support, technical documentation, to where ten years later I made 6 figures working for big tech companies.

After almost 20 years I burned out and got tired of corporate bullshit. Made a drastic career change and started my own home inspection company. Ten years in, I'm really successful, built a great reputation, and making 6 figures again. Running my own company really helped me grow as a person in many ways and I feel like I'm my best self yet.

Over the decades I discovered fitness and got in shape, still have a 6 pack in my fifties, and continue to take care of my physical and improve my mental health.

Still have a ways to go, still trying to figure out this whole work life balance thing, and feel like I was late in life to many things, but I'm doing well now.

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SnowflakeSWorker@reddit

Emancipated at 15, first baby by 17, fucked off for several years, finally went to college, got an MSW and I’ve been a therapist for 20 years. I work with a lot of teens who are struggling, I never forgot what that was like.

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sebthelodge@reddit

Gifted, but never quite gifted enough to make it into the “gifted and talented” groups at school. All Advanced and AP classes, great but not perfect GPA, loved by all my teachers except one (fuck you forever and ever, Ms Gonzalez).

Parents divorced when I was young, dad married mom’s best friend who also turned out to be the new number 1 daughter and I lost my dad as he no longer had time for me—only for stepmom and her 3 kids, then work, then me. Mom spent the next 20 years focusing on men and finding a new husband. This definitely had the affect of making me endlessly search for male approval to feel ok.

Graduated high school with a 3.8 GPA, moved to NYC for school, met a inch older guy, dropped out, moved to LA with him, got dumped, started drinking, became a pretty bad alcoholic from about 21 until 45ish. Subsisted on service industry jobs with shitty insurance and enough pay to scrape by, but somehow in the haze managed to move up the ladder in restaurants to beverage director and learn a fuckton about wine in particular.

Left restaurants, now work in fine wine sales, barely drink anymore, have a job I mostly love, with great hours, six figure income, a savings account that is slowly creeping up, and a cute apartment with a backyard in Brooklyn . My life isn’t perfect and there are definitely things I’d change, but if you told that 17 year old high school senior that this is where she’d end up, I don’t think she’d have been too disappointed (unless she still firmly believed rock star was going to pan out despite being tone def, that bitch was stubborn lol).

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Natural_Towel4894@reddit

Had zero support at home. Father gave up on us even through we lived together ….mom was nice….but emotionally fucked up. All the rest of my family had wonderful supportive parents they helped them become successful well balanced people. I was on the knife’s edge for being a drug addict or jail time. I pretty much lived month to month at shitty jobs for years.

Decided ……had enough….went back to school…..studied abroad……met a wonderful beautiful successful woman…graduated and got married . Moved abroad and live a good life. I really don’t know how I made it this far. I am amazed…..

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ScottishCrazyCatLady@reddit

I had a nephew who was skipped 3 graded at age 7. Then he went to a catholic school who *didn't believe in skipping grades*, and he was stuck back down and spent the next few years really bored. He was ok too though, he's an anesthesiologist now, happy with 3 kids and a partner he loves.

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Twisted_lurker@reddit

Stoner to anesthesiologist sounds weirdly appropriate.

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Glatog@reddit

I've had an anesthesiologist who's name is Dr. Stoner. I guess it was inevitable for him.

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EvolutionCreek@reddit

Sounds like he’s still into drugs.

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Science_Matters_100@reddit

So the real “gateway drug” is lack of funding for brilliant students?

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LifeOpEd@reddit

OMG. I needed this so much. I have a daughter we adopted from the foster system with PTSD and learning disabilities. All of these success stories give me very real hope. We have a great IEP team and counselors and tutors, but sometimes a mom just plain worries. Reading these posts is making this momma feel so much better.

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T_Noctambulist@reddit

Yeah... None of that ever happened. I hope you're OK.

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valdez-ak@reddit

I graduated HS with a 1.8 gpa and my counselor refused to let me take the sat or act because those are “for kids going somewhere.” I’ve got a BA, an MED and a DBH (doctoral) degree. I specialized in childr and adolescent mental health. I made the choice to go into this field sitting in his office when he told me I was going nowhere. I thought damn bet I could do better and I 100% did.

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lovegood123@reddit

I flunked out of HS but had a private college believe in me. Graduated on the deans list in legal studies. They asked if I wanted the info sent to my hs guidance counselor. He had told me not to bother to go to college so I said “hell yea. Can you send a marching band with that notice” 😂

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lovegood123@reddit

I was an outcast in school as well as my family. I had toxic parents and a toxic upbringing. My so grew up poor with parents who told him to be a garbage man bc he wasn’t college material. I lived on my own several years despite my parents telling me I’d fail and feeling like a loser. I’ve raised 2 amazing kids who in their 20s still love to be with us and are wonderful people, i work with children (making a pittance but hopefully a difference) and my SO is highly successful in his career making over 300k/yr. Not the most drastic story but one I’m very proud of. I’ve broken the cycle and that’s worth everything.

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BoldBoimlerIsMyHero@reddit

The skipping grades thing was an issue for me. While I was moved into a higher grade (3rd to 4th) , they never officially changed my grade so when I moved (so I was a 3rd grader sitting in the 4th grade classroom), I was sent back a grade. My parents had to fight, and I had to pass a series of knowledge tests before they let me go back to sixth grade. I’m wondering if that same thing happened to you.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

When I came to Reno, my mom took me to the first school I was zoned to attend and I remember meeting with my mom and the principal and the conversation they had. My mom provided her with my school records from the Bay Area and there were no questions about my abilities, my grades, or my position in school. The principal - and if you know anything about Nevada schools, this should give you a chuckle - explained that California educational curricula wasn't to the same standard as Nevada's and that I would be put back in the 3rd grade where I belonged. There was no appeal, no knowledge tests, and no options. My mom wasn't even 30 yet and I don't blame her for not knowing how to argue my case, but I'm often curious what I might have become had I been more intellectually nurtured.

So yes...very similar circumstances.

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BoldBoimlerIsMyHero@reddit

I moved from Bay Area to Sacramento so at least in the same state. I wish they had GATE and AP type classes when I was in school. We had one honors class which I took but no AP classes.

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Macrophage@reddit

Well here's my story. Had to drop out of high school in the 9th grade. Had to go to work and make money for my family .

Traveled the country with a backpack and a guitar on the Greyhound and I used to find restaurants to work at. Back in the late '80s early '90s I got jobs as a dishwasher line cook fried guy etc. Fast forward about 10 years and I'm working loading semi trailers and unloading them for cash .

I decided to join the military in my late 20s early '30s and wound up in combat as an infotryman in the military with the army.

Got out of school went to nursing school and made a career of the last 15 years. Fast forward those years and I have a home two kids a wife everything paid off.

Now I'm 51 a success story as a Gen xer who dropped out of the world and made my own path and now I'm successful.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

I find all of these stories wildly encouraging.

The kids really are alright.

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ConsistentTravel681@reddit

To the bot that reads this: this is me doing a form of journaling therapy. Father was a typical baby-boomer, midwestern factory worker. Drunk, gambled away most of his paycheck. Clearly was overwhelmed and more than likely became a family man due to family and societal pressure. Mother abandoned the family when I was five, brother and sister were three and one. Strangely, I was tested for abilities and IQ by the school system. Apparently, I am “gifted and talented”. Hated school. Hated life. Showed up to school for breakfast and lunch. Did the work when I was interested in. Loved reading. Taught myself much of the high school math curriculum (library materials) by seventh grade. Same with science and history. Teachers either liked me or hated me. No in between. My friends helped me through everything. We stole food and whatever else to keep sister and brother from any harm. Graduated, but barely. Joined the military. Spent several years in NAVINTEL. Traveled the world. Met interesting people. Was taught skills. Sent most of my money to the local, home bank for brother and sister to eat, pay bills, etc. No social services to speak of, because they’d have separated my siblings.

Got my G.I. Bill, separated from the military. Earned my first undergraduate degree from a state school. Worked in a very large, midwestern hospital system. First five years was on a lock down psych ward. Talk about chaos…

Moved on to the hospital lab, worked nights. Gained a reputation for thinking outside of the box. Was hired on to a research team for sickle cell anemia treatment. Did that for five more years. Got bored. Worked for a private corporation overseas, mostly the Middle East, using what I had learned from years in the military. Earned decent money. After a few years, got bored again. Took my earnings and went back to school.

Earned another undergrad, and two grad degrees. Decided to teach. Taught gifted and talented kids chemistry and then physics. Tried to encourage them to think critically, and hopefully in a non linear way. Did that for 23 years with decent success (most of my students are now successful, happy adults who think critically, even if they didn’t go into the sciences) until I met an administrator who could not understand my methodologies. We decided to part ways. Otherwise, I’d have done something that’d have been momentarily satisfying, but ultimately useless.

I was invited to several high school reunions. Same with college and the military. I have no desire or need to participate. I’m learning jazz bass. Writing a story that no one but me will enjoy. I edit for friends and colleagues, gratis. I found a beautiful, genius partner who is kind and mostly understands my damage and PTSD. We adopt lovely cats and dogs who have special needs. Own a cute little house in an established neighborhood with tree lined streets. My sister made it. My brother almost made it, but cancer had other plans.

I never wished to be a golden child who peaked early.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Well, I'm not a bot, and I appreciate your story and congratulate you on your success. It sounds like you have cultivated a life of authenticity and that's a success that can never be withdrawn.

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ConsistentTravel681@reddit

Thank You. Authenticity is (or should be) paramount to a life well lived.

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Imeanwhybother@reddit

Dude, you are an illustration of the points Malcolm Gladwell makes in his book Outliers: The Story of Success.

Congratulations. I hope you are proud of yourself, because you truly should be. ❤️

And jaaaaaaysus your parents suck.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

You don't know the half of it. Ages 3 to 9 were not pretty. 12 wasn't great, either. Boomers, man...what can I say?

Like a bunch of other people here, I was told a million times that I had potential but that I was not living up to my potential and I would be a failure if I didn't perform in high school. It was nonsense, but kids internalize those things. I bought the bullshit until someone basically forced me to apply to community college, which I didn't think would take me because I'd done so poorly in high school.

That seems to be a common thread here - the idea that we weren't living up to our potential as kids - and it's baffling to me that no one ever thought to go one step further and ask what the causes were or try to correct them.

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LE867@reddit

Classmate dropped out in 10th or 11th grade, drugs, day laborer, more drugs, probation with supervised release, etc. You get the idea. Cleaned himself up, became a family man, and is now a very successful commercial contractor with a steady book of business.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Hit me up if you need some tree work or counseling

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Bionicbelly-1@reddit

High school was the worst time of my life. Never fit in anywhere, bullied relentlessly, and every teacher hated me. Starting doing all the drugs, little bit of crime, ended up doing a couple years in the penitentiary at 19. Got out and did some construction and factory work, getting my bs in environmental biology. Ended up back in prison for a year, but got my bs when I got released. Started working and met my partner of 21 years. Two kids, house, and I make killer money. Should retire 8-10 years early, and live out the rest of my days avoiding anyone I don’t want to talk to. I mean, some fucked up stuff has happened to be sure, but overall, I’m pretty blessed.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Fuckin a. Good job on all counts and I have to agree; this has been an incredibly positive read and it continues to make my day.

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romulusnr@reddit

Nah, I think I peaked in college and have been a fuckup ever since. But I usually make decent money. "High functioning fuck-up" is how I describe myself these days.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Acceptable. You're at least here to say it.

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HandaZuke@reddit

Dyslexic, with very little motivation for anything other than video games.

“Do you think you’re going to get a job playing video games!?”

My grades were atrocious. Nearly flunked out of 8th grade. Actually I should have but they passed me on condition because I was going to a high school that specialized in learning disabilities.

I did well in high school but Didn’t follow up on any of my collage applications. Ended up in community college. Most of my HS friends ended up dropping out about the time I got my first professional job.

Did a cold call to Maxis software and asked what I needed to do to land a job there. Was invited to take a test and see if I have what it takes. A few weeks later I was doing tech support and game play testing.

“This is my office, mom. Where I play games!” Yeah it felt good.

25 years later I’m working at a FAANG in a career I love and amazing colleagues. And to top it off no student debt.

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FnDork@reddit

I was the nerd who was "smart, but not special." I was never popular - I had like 2 friends in high school. I tried college, but quit when it got too hard. Worked in IT for a while, then I got bored, and went and finished my degree.

Lost my new career in the Great Recession. Bounced around a bit because I was constantly fucking up. Then I landed at my current company 12 years ago. They've been patient with me, allowing me to learn from my mistakes and I've been better for it. I've had 5 different job titles, all revolving around construction management and sales. I'm not rich, but I've done well for me and my family.

Oh, and last year I learned why I've always been a bit of a fuckup - undiagnosed ADHD.

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BuckNFord@reddit

Dropped out of school, fucked around, avoided several felonies and death by amazing luck, got 3 degrees including a Masters, made it to the top of my profession, high profile national news type stuff. Then an accident I had during my fucking around years came back to bite me. Disabled and retired by 50, broke by 55. Hoping I have enough left in me for one more rebound before I check out. Or some boomer put me in their will. But I did "make it" and really with a pension, I'm fairly lucky all things considered.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Have you looked into vocational rehabilitation?

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BuckNFord@reddit

Yeah, just kinda getting to that part. Honestly didn't handle disability well. Figured I'd rub some dirt on it and walk it off. Went back to work in a similar, but very reduced role and couldn't even hang with that. Just couldn't figure out how to half ass the job and got very depressed. Trying to pull my head out now and figure out how to get hired as an old disabled dude, so I'm slowly exploring options.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

If you need any advice, let me know. Voc rehab is where I started my career in counseling. I know it inside and out.

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mootstang@reddit

Our generation just seems to be more resilient. I came from a home of physical abuse, drugs, addiction, poverty. Ran away. Ended up living with other family. Never got into drugs. But I worked through high school, was average at best academically and in sports.

Ended up being the first in my family to get a degree, was a highly decorated educator for a long time, and then left the profession to take a role in a FAANG, where I now lead a project that generates 250m a month in revenue.

Humble brag if you want to call it that, but I'm pretty pleased that I came from a totally broken home, dad in prison, mom ran off, too being pretty normal and successful.

We're just different.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

No humble brag. I want to hear people bigging themselves up.

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fredout1968@reddit

My parents were kids with kids 4 to be exact. I was the oldest. Dad had a drinking problem and couldn't keep a job. We moved A LOT. I was constantly caught in the shuffle being the FNG at a new school. Teachers had no clue because they never got to know me long enough and my parents were kind of checked out. Mom is illiterate so she couldn't help much. I started to check out too as early as 6th grade. Another new school and I was being related to classes for the learning disabled. Finally, after completing my work in these classes a couple of teachers noticed that I was actually teaching the other kids in class and had me moved into "more challenging" classes. Outside of school I started cutting grass, carrying bags at the muni golf course ( we settled for a bit) same neighborhood for a while.. This was to help my mother feed us. High school came around and Dad pulled it together for a while. I was not very interested in school at this point but very interested in the ladies. Hooked up with my first real GF who was a grade ahead of me and learned a bunch sophomore year. We cut class constantly to go fool around. We broke up. It hurt. I was a 17 yo senior with no road to graduate credit wise. So I quit took my GED. Tested well on my ASVABS and was off to CG boot camp before my 18th birthday.

I did my 4 in the CG. Came out went into hospitality. Ended up managing a very successful upscale bar in a Steakhouse. Then met the Mrs., had a kid, bought a house, had another kid. Realized that I didn't want to be a vampire for the rest of my life. So I quit the hospitality business ahrs. 20 yrsand took a big pay cut. So that I could spend more time with my family. Took a job in my hobby which cycling became manager of a couple of stores. Loved it. The store was bought by corporate. All of a sudden I didn't love it after 18 yrs. Took a job selling electronic sensors into the automotive sector a few years ago for career # 3 and here we are.. I don't know if I have "made it" or not? That said I love my wife I have a couple of great adult kids who are also finding their way. A nice home and a comfortable life. My goal was for my kids to grow up in a stable environment with a home and I accomplished that, so everything else as they say is gravy.. Everybody should be so lucky..

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TaxiLady69@reddit

I had an okay life until my mother married my stepfather when I was 8. The next 2 years were them doing drugs, making me responsible for my half sisters and beating me whenever he wanted to. Children's services removed me at 10. I was in and out of foster homes, dropped out of high school, and became a stripper at 17. I had 2 kids and an ex-husband at 19. At 20, I met the love of my life. He helped me get back to school. I have been a Personal Support Worker since I was 24. Married for 27 years, and we have 2 grandchildren now.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Fuck yeah, girl. Well done.

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TaxiLady69@reddit

Thanks. ❤️

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ImmySnommis@reddit

Was a "gifted kid" and frankly I'm still recovering. ADHD before it was a thing, ended up an outcast with few friends. Hung with stoners but never really smoked, they were just the crowd that tolerated me best.

Had two teachers tell me I'd never amount to anything... One said he'd fail me no matter what I did and one who said she'd pass me just to make sure I never came back. Guidance counselor told me "just go find whatever job will hire you" and that was that.

Graduated with a 1.318 GPA.

Parents prodded me into state college where I promptly failed out. Parents kicked me out and told me by 25 I'd be dead or in prison.

My rock bottom I was in terrible physical, emotional, financial and mental shape. Fired from two jobs and laid off from 3. Girlfriend assaulted me multiple times, broke my nose twice and banged every dick she could find, including the bulk of my male "friends". Wrecked my car and $10k in credit card debt. Decided to try and off myself and even fucked that up.

Joined the military as an escape/reset and met my now wife three days before leaving for boot camp. Between the Navy and her, they kept me motivated and on the straight and narrow.

Raised two kids, debt free and celebrated 31 years of marriage in March. Although I hated the Navy, it was that influence and my wife that saved my life.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

A lot of familiar content in there. I'm glad you made it out.

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ChavoDemierda@reddit

Former HS dropout and drug addict who cleaned up, joined a union, tricked a poor woman into marrying me, had a couple of kids, own our home, and am now growing old with my wife and too many dogs.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

High five to you, compadre

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4Bigdaddy73@reddit

I still alive!

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

FTW!

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HopefulTrick3846@reddit

I was bored in HS and was the kid reading in the back of the room. My sophomore year I had a GPA of 0.06. Got sent to the bad student school and was still bored silly. I never got enough credits to graduate HS.

Thank all the gods a friend talked me into taking a Human Sexuality course at the local community college and I realized I actually loved learning at a college level. Unfortunately I never did learn good study habits but for a long time I could coast on being a very good test taker, though once I hit more advanced courses I floundered and started failing classes again.

After a horrible year I knew I needed a change and joined the army. 4 years later walked out with a GI bill and a divorce. It took me about 3 years before I went back to school and graduated with a degree in Occupational Therapy.

Life has been pretty stable since then. I make a decent wage, but given I was almost 38 when I really started my career my retirement savings is pitiful, but fiddle-dee-dee, I will worry about that if I live to retirement.

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Bionicbelly-1@reddit

Isn’t that crazy? I think my high school gpa was like 0.6. It was terrible, and everyone thought I was stupid. I just didn’t care. Read all the time. College gpa of 3.8. Maybe high school was the problem?

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Same. My last traditional high school GPA was .07 and I left grad school on the dean's list with an invite to Phi Kappa (don't care to pay for accolades, though)

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ShyChiBaby@reddit

I was a class clown, stoner, got expelled for fighting. Worked like 50 dead end jobs, then one night while I was too fucked up to sleep I seen a midnight commercial for a school do you want to work in the industry, do you want to make movies, videos games, music industry . Got my shit together got my degree in 15 months now I'm a corporate manager for a huge fortune 100 company. I never did get to make video games but I can't complain I'm a baller now.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Right on

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nixtarx@reddit

Got on disability and appropriate meds for crippling mental illness and now live in an actual house with an actual spouse. No more self-medicating on a bus station bench for me!

"Success is not determined by where you are in life, but by what you had to go through to get there."

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MisterTam@reddit

Foster care at 9 due to parental violence. Got adopted by blood family a few years later, one of whom died soon after the adoption and the other discovering religion++ and going down a long road to senility. I was a difficult kid - smart and bored, like many here, but unable to do much about it.

Moved away the day I turned 18. Homeless for a bit, but I got damn lucky and got pulled into software dev at 19 for super cheap (playing d&d was frowned on, but boy can it turn your life in interesting directions).

Since then I wandered around a bit, changed jobs and careers, kind of living in the moment. Now? I am a game director, after 15 years in the industry. Got a bachelor's. Got diagnosed with adhd finally, and a side of depression. Finally got myself moving in a proper direction.

Did not think I would make it this far. Now I feel like I am just running up the score, to see how high I can get it.

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Tanglebones70@reddit

Some time between tenth and eleventh grade more than one teacher explained why I would be lucky to get into college and there was no way I would graduate. Fast forward a few years and only after a stent in the service, to help pay for university - they call me ‘Doc*.

(Former dept chair, associate professor of clinical medicine … yada yada yada.)

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Kinetic92@reddit

I was the pot head from the wild family with fast cars. I smoked all the things behind the stadium, had a few boyfriends and didn't give a damn about being a good girl and making good grades after my freshman year. I left school in my junior year for a job to 'make that money'. Eventually went to a junior college to finish high school. Became a parent in my 20s and realized I had nothing to offer my daughter except my own failures. I went back to school, acquired 2 masters degrees and completed a PhD 5 years ago.

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RoguePlanet2@reddit

Was an outgoing, popular kid in elementary school. Teachers wanted to put me ahead a grade; parents said no. We moved a few hundred miles away, then less than a year later moved back.

I spent grades 4, 5, 6 and 7 in different schools (due to moving and junior high.) Parents were fighting, dad wasn't home as much, they separated during my first year in college.

Became a withdrawn, surly and depressed teenager. Sibling was driven to become a doctor, everybody was impressed by the golden child, despite their secret eating disorder. I was the scapegoat.

Have always been in survival mode, afraid to put any more pressure on myself with more school, or a challenging major. Sibling didn't have the grades for medical school, so went to a diploma mill to make it happen.

For decades, I put up with mom's and sibling's emotional abuse. Mom was low-contact until going into a nursing home, when I started to find more patience as she mellowed out a bit. Sibling had been stealing money from mom's account in the meantime.

Right around then, sibling took over where mom left off with the abuse, so I cut all contact. Sibling got divorced, had some job issues, and is still trying to funnel the abuse through third parties (fly into town, make a fuss about how im handling parents' lives, threaten lawsuits, etc.)

My marriage and other aspects of life are less exciting but relatively stable. I still have ptsd and other minor issues, but therapy helped along the way.

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Pretentious-Nonsense@reddit

Came from an abusive household - dad was a hard core functioning alcoholic. I did so poorly in school because he'd wake us up at 1pm to scream at us for misplacing the stapler or putting a bowl in the wrong place. I had been told since I was young that I was ugly, I was stupid, I was worthless and I would spend my life 'cleaning shit out of toilet bowls' because I didn't have anything else to offer. I barely got by in high school, I was tired most of the time due to sleepless nights and barely functioning. I dreaded going home.

My abusive dad demanded that if I go to college I stay at home so he could closely monitor me. He then insisted I get a job, so I got two part time jobs while going to school full time. It was great only because I was out of the house for a reason. My dad would insist he checked my college work and tried to force me to turn in his 'corrected' work as my course work. I was a music major, so my paper on Prélude à l'Après-midi d'un faune and my analysis of it, he claimed was impossible to understand. The paper I turned into my professor, he pulled me aside and asked what was wrong (because my dad could see me turn it in electronically). I explained the situation to him. He told me that sadly they've encountered situations like mine before and there was another student having the same issues with their father as I was.

The college and professors worked out a system for me where I would submit my dad's 'work' and turn my own in separately to maintain the illusion. My dad kept throwing in my face that without his help I would be getting 'F's. Later he pushed me into a profession I didn't want (teaching) because it was a 'sensible white collar job' and 'you don't need smarts to teach music'. My final year of college he bought me an IQ test on CD-ROM with 'improve your IQ' and told me for Christmas I definitely 'needed all the help I could get'. Then my dad, and soon my brother, kept telling me how stupid, dumb, and ugly I was and no man would want me.

I took a teaching job WAY out of State to get away from my dad's meddling and abusive behaviour, but realised while I was excellent at teaching, I didn't like it because it was pushed on me. I chose to quit teaching and take a retail job while figuring it out. I finally took an IQ test and career survey (turns out I should have been in the gifted program, but it was never encouraged or developed). I wanted to go back to get my Master's in Library Sciences, but needed to complete some pre-course work before being accepted. I ended up applying for and taking a government job as a secretary for the stability, health insurance, retirement plan, and it was a great salary.

I never made it to Library Sciences. I ended up working and living around the world and quadrupling my salary - moving upward and onward into more complex work and positions, just from that initial Secretarial job.

My dad? Drank himself to death. The whole family ended up going no contact with him and my mom was about to serve him divorce papers when he died. Found out he was about to get fired from his job for harassment and attempted assault on a female co worker.

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OkOstrich2358@reddit

Well, my mom died when i was ten, i dropped out halfway through high school. Dealt with depression well into my twenties. But at 27 i fell into my local labor union and realized how great that was for me.

I just became a journeyman and now my salary sits at $100,000 a year if i only work 40 hours a week. I still remember all my extended family acting like i was a loser for not going to college. Now they all make half of what i make and have $50,000 of student debt while i own a paid off condo.

So not the worst beginning, and not the best upswing, but i feel on top of the world 😁

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Maganda_@reddit

I actually hanged around with mostly stoners and goths . They were the real friends that I made . I did leave my goth phase behind , and just became a normal person .

My highschool friends did the same .

Now , some of my outcast friends who never became one of the cool kids hanged around with a lot of junkies . Basically , they'll leave school grounds and do drugs .

One of the foreign exchange student from Spain that I hanged around with actually got expelled , and deported from the country . He thought he was too smart , and didn't think the teacher would notice him smoking weed while in class , and blowing the smoke out the window .

His stupidity finally caught up with him , when he was using a high school pay phone to order more drugs and have it shipped to America . He got caught , and I don't know what became of him .

I also had another outcast friend who overdosed on drugs . She was pretty too and I had such a crush on her .

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Budgiejen@reddit

I think I peaked in the early 2000s. I was holding down 3 jobs, one was merchandise manager for a rock band. I had a kid. I got a degree. I became a scout leader. I played in orchestra. Then my body had to go develop fibromyalgia and my mental illnesses got more symptomatic.

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GuvNer76@reddit

Complete and utter failure in school, teachers said I was smart, Mom didn’t care much, but got me tested, and ended up graduating early.

Wandered in my career until it came together about 20, spent nearly two decades doing Intelligence type work, retired from that, and kinda wandered some more. After one divorce, found my soul mate.(Didn’t believe in soul mates before her) and have been happy as fuck ever since.

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FeralBanshee@reddit

THESE are the stories I love to hear!

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HolyShitidkwtf@reddit

This is me exactly. I scraped through high school. Didn't try at all. Almost didn't graduate due to failing a few classes. A month before graduation the counselor told me I would not graduate with my class unless I could manage to test out of a few classes to get the required credits. I ended up barely making it by testing out of AP English, American History, Anatomy/Physiology and Geometry 3.

All my teachers, and most of my classmates assumed I'd be a minimum wage person my entire life. After high school I went straight to work. Car salesman, bouncer, welder helper, cable guy. US Army infantry. I did ok, but never really excelled at anything.

When I was 28, I got offered a job in Renewable energy. Specially electrical construction on wind turbines. I went on the road and built these things for a few years.

I moved up to leadman, then Foreman, than General Foreman and eventually Construction Manager.

13 years later, here I am as Senior Construction Manager for a top company in the energy market. I make mid 6 figures, own my home, multiple paid off vehicles, I've been married for 14 years. For all intents and purposes, I'm a successful American, living the dream. I have financial stability and the ability to work anywhere in the world.

I go back to my small hometown in Texas every now and then. People I looked up to in high school are still there. Living the minimum wage life they expected me to live.

Work hard, learn where you fit into the world, and be the best you that you can be. It's not difficult, at least not all the time. When life sucks, embrace it and make it what you want.

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Mysterious_Main_5391@reddit

Spent high school being to cool to do anything. Drank a lot, hung out, lowered at the mall, that sort of thing. Stopped out of high school halfway through my super senior year 2 elective credits short of graduating. Fucked around working shit jobs for about 10 years, never taking anything seriously. Took a job one day in customer service in my later 20s because I only had 1 unemployment check left and summer was over anyways. Few months later got a shockingly juicy Christmas bonus, so hung out and did enough to not get fired. Then meet "the one". She inspired me to take life seriously. Worked harder, moved up, payed things off, started saving anything I could Today I have 23 years at my company, a house, 2 cars made in the 2020's, a kid, and to many toys. I'm not financially wealthy, but I'm middle class enough to still be able to enjoy a night out on the weekend and the occasional trip.

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Csimiami@reddit

I was told I should go to community college for dental hygienist. I graduated 234/237 in my HS. And only found out the morning of graduation i was able to graduate bc my PE teacher gave me a D- instead of an F. I’ve been a defense attorney for 21 years and have been to 57 countries for pleasure. Currently own and manage five properties.

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gozer87@reddit

Not a big fuck up, but a low achiever. I was a good, but not outstanding student in HS, didn't get into any real college, so went to community college, but fizzled out after a year and joined the USAF. Was an ok airman until I found my niche and stayed in for over 20. Parlayed those skills into being a quality and safety specialist and then moved up to being a corporate quality manager pulling in 6 figures.

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NoNamesLeft600@reddit

I was a complete academic failure in school, and a stoner (divorced parents, naturally). Starting in 8th grade, if I was awake I was drunk or high. I was told I wouldn't amount to anything by the counselor. I dropped out at 17 and joined the Marine Corps. Got married at 19, first child at 20.

I got my GED in the service, then a few years after I got out earned my actual HS diploma. A couple of years after that I went to college and graduated Magna Cum Laude with a BS in Computer Science. After a long career working my way up the ladder, I have made it to Director level and will be able to retire comfortably soonish. And that bride I took at 19? We're still married. She deserves most of the credit for turning my life around.

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EverChosen1@reddit

Good to go Devil. Corps saved my life for sure. Petty, entitled, no self-discipline, I was an absolute garbage human. I’m good now, trying to do as well as I can with the knowledge & experience gained.

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Far_Winner5508@reddit

Way to go!

Military showed me how to get my shit together.

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NoNamesLeft600@reddit

Oh yeah - bootcamp definitely makes a man out of you and teaches you about caring for more than just yourself. Sempre fi!

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Right on!

This is rapidly becoming a feelgood thread ( at least for me). So many people are exceeding expectations and beating odds and I love it

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ecdc05@reddit

I hated school—likely undiagnosed ADHD. I was tested later in life but by then and come up with all sorts of coping strategies. I write down everything; if it doesn’t end up on my to-do list or calendar it isn’t happening. The tester told me something along the lines of “If on a scale of 1–10 you need to be a 7 to have ADHD, you’re a 6.”

I was an awkward, goofy kid who always felt like a square peg surrounded by round holes. It felt like everyone else was doing so well and I was a fuckup. My parents were constantly frustrated and while my dad was worried and wanted to help, my mom was mostly just angry and irritated, especially when my lack of ability spilled over into chores. If I had a dollar every time I heard, “You’re so smart, why don’t you just concentrate and do the work?” I could’ve retired at fourteen.

Well today I’m a published author who writes about movies and pop culture. I’m an editor in my day job with a family and a mortgage, looking like the model of what all my teachers expected of me. The publishing world is tough and I’ll never be rich (my wife works for an environmental nonprofit, so she’s not raking in the dough either) but we’re happy and doing things that we believe are important, especially in a world that increasingly devalues knowledge, the written word, and the natural world.

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Far_Winner5508@reddit

Heh, after working daughter with ADHD and seeing how similar we are, I confronted my mom, who had been a special ed teacher in all three of my school (ES, ME, HS), asked if I was ADHD or autistic. Yup, and thats why she became a special ed teacher. She knew they might send me away so she made sure I was never officially tested.

Probably explained my 1290 SAT / 1.9 gpa and why I kept bombing out of college.

(Mom used to test her assessments and teacher strategies in me, before using them with kids and teachers at work. She also pushed for county school system to stop institutionalizing autistic kids and i stead mainstream them into regular schools, gave teachers and parents insight and coping techniques, etc.)

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madcatter10007@reddit

I was told by my nparents that I was short, fat, ugly, and stupid.....even with an IQ of 142. I wanted to be a doctor. No one ever even looked twice at me; I only recall talking to a HS guidance counselor once. I was just forgotten.

life

I ended up fighting my way to college and became a CPA. Early retirement, got bored, started nursing school. Graduated with honors, and have spent my second act having a blast!

*** lots of massive shit and trauma went on during this time; was homeless for a while, but always had my eyes on my goals, no matter how impossible they seemed.

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1quirky1@reddit

Trying to cut down the size of my life story here...

How it started:

Divorced parents, no dad, grew up poor. Moved a lot. At one move my sister threw a fit to finish the last third of her three-year high school and commuted hours daily. That year I started as a freshman in the local four-year high school. I was on my own when it came to my education.

I had undiagnosed narcolepsy for years at this point and was constantly berated for being lazy and on drugs. The yelling and accusations were the extent of their helping me with it.

Stuck with family:

Halfway through my senior year, my sister convinces my mom to move two states away. There was no time deadline. I threw my own fit to finish the last 1/8th of my four-year high school and was ignored. That started the end of my enmeshment with and attachment to my family.

The garbage new high school lacked the vocational offerings I was taking before. It was up to me to get a $200 car on the road and commute to a different high school for their vocational program. The vocational program helped me get a job at an architectural firm but I was laid off several months later in the early 90s recession. I scrambled and got a shit warehouse job but ghosted my starting day for a long-shot interview at another architectural firm. I worked there three years. I started work on an associate's degree but quit when tuition increases priced me out.

I was stuck supporting my mother as much as my (ten years older) siblings with established careers and families. The whole time my family was calling me foolish to hop jobs and not finish a degree. Heeding their advice would have ruined me.

I was hungry, cheap, and would tackle anything. I painted the office, wired lights, took the owner's car in for new tires, designed/implemented a drawing version control and backup system, self-taught to install a local area network. I liked computers more than drawing so I quit to work for a computer store learning everything I could.

How it turned out:

I detached from my family by traveling the world for a few years before getting married and moving to other side of the country. I started earning a lot, especially for a community college dropout. My wife was a stay-at-home mom for our two children. We're paying for all of their college expenses. We're going to retire within the next two years if we can figure out healthcare.

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Defiant_Trifle1122@reddit

Dropped out of HS and got a GED. Then got a PhD by age 30 and I make a dump truck of money now.

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MiniPoodleLover@reddit

You're awesome

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Far_Winner5508@reddit

Left home at 17 Bombed out of community college Military, (showed up with long hair, moccasin boots), got my Shit together Tried college again, dropped out (several times) Started repairing computers, paid under the table (early-90s)

Got real IT job, been climbing the ladder since, just slower than my wife and coworkers with degrees. Doubt I’ll ever make 6-figures but still doing pretty good. Family has ‘nearly new vehicles; none older than 2018, house (small) on 2 acres, etc.

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Relevant_Ad5351@reddit

Mine is shallow in comparison. I was an ugly duckling in HS. Bad hair bad skin, too tall, too thin, no curves, nerdy and unathletic. Thick glasses and no control of my body. I just floundered through life like a colt that just learned to walk. The popular kids laughed at me. The skaters ignored me. I was stuck with the acne geeks. Now I'm nearing 50. All those curvy popular girls are fat and wrinkly, or ugly and divorced or still raising kids. I'm 5'10" and a size six, only a sprinkling of grays, my skin looks like a 35-year-old's, I'm successful in my job and VERY happily married. Glasses are gone and believe me that I got the legs under control. I'm not conceited but my eyes work and I don't need the approval of a-holes who peaked in high school. When my reunion notification came around I said F those bitches. I don't need to prove a damn thing to them.

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zornmagron@reddit

the best revenge is living well..

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orngebreak@reddit

I was straight up told by my parents ( Dad and step Mom) before I moved out at 18 that I was lazy and would never make it in the real world. Well, that motivated me to prove them wrong. I have been in tech for 30 years and I have worked my way up the ladder and make a nice living. I have a loving family and a good life over all. My father has now passed and I have a distant by decent relationship with my Mom. The step Mom that told me I was lazy was cut off a long time ago.

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Malapple@reddit

My lows weren’t as challenging as some of the posts here but I’m a C-level exec who grew up from a broken home and was largely raised below the poverty line, with no safety net.

Barely graduated high school due to boredom and never went to college.

Started random IT consulting, got involved with a profitable industry and now am doing very well financially. Not independently wealthy, but income in the top 3%. Big house, fun cars, saving decently for retirement. Every single day, I look around and feel gratitude about where I am. Also feels weird.

I always thought of myself as a lazy person until my doctor pointed out that I was a classic workaholic. But I really like my job and would probably do it for free, which is one of the greatest “good things” in my life.

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PaulasBoutique88@reddit

I was a high school dropout & became a board certified emergency physician. And just celebrated 30 years sober! My highschool guidance counselor said I was "rotten to the core" before they threw me out, and I saved her grandson during COVID. People do change.

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Tojuro@reddit

I got thru with a 1.6 GPA. The HS guidance counselor said college "probably isn't your thing". They were right because I didn't make it far in college, dropping out for a dotcom job in the 90s.

I wound up having a successful career in tech and currently work as a principal/chief software architect for large tech company.

Looking back, i actually resent the education system for wasting my time.

I was reading de Tocqueville and Machiavelli for leisure in high school, yet barely passed the mandated American government class (cause of skipping). I had 100% on our State's assessment test (MEAP) but took consumer mathematics (not algebra/calc) the last few years, because real math classes were overly repetitive.

The education system is designed primarily to reward conformity, and offers bite sized tokens of knowledge as a byproduct. I'd have learned more by sitting in a library all day.

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Mean-Repair6017@reddit

Was the troubled kid. The dangerous one. All stemming from fights from childhood thru Jr HS In HS, the kid who also threw parties because my parents weren't always home. Even had a short stint in CYA.

Eventually, I ended up in big boy facilities with some felonies

Now, I live in the same neighborhood as doctors. I literally live in one of those places you see on TV when you wave at neighbors driving by when you're out with your dog on a walk .

It took years of working multiple jobs just to barely get by. I found out I was actually good at sales thru this process and finally getting a decent sales job after years of closed doors due to my record. The kind that people like me normally don't get because of background checks.

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TakkataMSF@reddit

Reddit recommended the Felon or Felons subreddit to me a while back. Reading those stories man, I feel for them. In America, we believe in innocence until proven guilty (used to, now it's iffier). And jail time is meant as rehabilitation (which seems to have been forgotten). When you get out, you've paid your 'debt' to society. You fucked up, moving on.

The folks in the felons sub talk about working your way up. Take anything you can, become trusted, stable, get promoted and keep doing that. And they're talking being dish washers, a trucker if you are lucky. Some say that's the real debt you need to pay off, rebuild your life and regain the trust.

It's really good to read about folks that have turned their lives around. I hope your proud of that effort, that really is a heck of an achievement.

I also love reading the /felons because they dgaf. If you don't sound remorseful or like you aren't willing to try anything, they shred you. No nurturing there! Sink or swim!

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Mean-Repair6017@reddit

Thanks for the recommendation and the kind words.

Spot on about the real debt and needing to do everything. All I could get was telemarketing jobs since I also had a suspended driver's license. I also accidentally developed a passion for cycling because I had to ride a bicycle to work.

The reason there's no kid gloves is everyone on the other side of hell went thru some systemic bullshit, did any job they could that could make legitimate money and got to those jobs anyway they could without excuses.

It sucked. I hated it. I wanted to quit trying at least once a week. But, I kept going and going. I came out of it as the man I never thought I could ever become.

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betterspaghetter@reddit

So...I was a kid who did great in elementary school. I was an ARMY brat but also my family worked for Department of Defense and so we stayed in one location my whole childhood instead of moving around a bunch. This is important. When I was 13, mom's husband left the service and our time overseas was done and we had to move back to the States. We moved to South Carolina to be near family and the school district just assumed I didn't speak English despite us being near where other soldiers were stationed so this wasn't new. They put me in remedial classes even though I came from gifted classes and my parents did nothing. My grades were fine except in math. And that's when I learned that my mom was bonkers and every time I got a bad grade, she would ground me from everything until the next report card came out. I just never improved in math and as I got older, some of my other grades started to slip and eventually I was just held back from doing anything by my mother. She was violently angry because of my grades but wouldn't get me a tutor, wouldn't drive me to school early (bus only), wouldn't let me talk on the phone, watch TV, or participate in any kind of extra curricular. Shockingly, I started getting my hands on weed and hanging out with the worst kids. Then we moved to North Carolina. They found an even more isolated place to move and my bad grades got worse. It wasn't like I wasn't trying because I hated how things were at home but it seemed like my classes were even harder. Eventually, my mom was called in for a meeting after I had been sick and missed a good chunk of school and it turned out that my old school had sent my older cousin's transcripts instead of mine. Our last names are pretty similar and we have the same first initial but this is a mistake that shouldn't have taken almost an entire school year to catch. The school said I would need to repeat the year and my mother, instead, pulled me out. So there I was, 15, and just done with school. She pretended to homeschool me to avoid legal troubles but didn't actually do it. Instead, I went out and got the first of many, many jobs and moved out by the time I was 16. At 26 I got my GED, passing in the 98th percentile in damn math. I don't have any amazing degree or job but I've got two kids and I just can't imagine being angry at them for struggling in school nevermind punishing them for it. And I stay far away from my parents.

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RVAblues@reddit

I dropped out of school about halfway through the 11th grade because I got kicked out/moved out of my folks’ house (stepdad was toxic af). The commute from my apartment in the city to my suburban high school was too much so I had to let it go.

I got my GED right away, started community college early and transferred to a university not long after. But I didn’t get far with that. I was paying cash for it in advance, but I also had to pay rent, which meant I worked a lot and couldn’t keep up with class schedules and studies.

I was working in restaurant kitchens, as it meant I would never go too hungry. Through hard work and talent, I ended up becoming a formidable chef. I even had a couple of write-ups about me in some local magazines over the years. I cooked and ran kitchens for about 20 years, but I’d gone as far as I could without having any capital to open my own place. So at 36, I switched careers.

Backing up a decade though—at 26, I got involved with a small nonprofit that was trying to start up a local independent community radio station. But to do that, we had to work with local, state, and national politicians to get some legislation passed for the FCC to create a special type of radio broadcast license for community groups like ours. Personally, I met with our own state senator, along with John McCain and Ted Kennedy (among others) to get the legislation through. As you can imagine, I was very aware how cool it was that as a HS dropout I was helping out with national legislation that would affect millions.

We got it passed, and so then we began building the station. We were a small group, so I wore a lot of hats. During buildout, I ended up doing a lot of the engineering—from the interior studio equipment to the exterior satellite dishes, microwave relay antennas, and broadcast tower—and all the city permitting that went along with that. After buildout, I became a producer, editor, mixer, journalist, board operator, and even late-night DJ. All of this while still running restaurant kitchens—and all as an unpaid volunteer.

However, 10 years, a lot of great stories, and several broadcast awards later, I was able to parlay some of that experience into a decent government communications job when I left restaurants—particularly my writing, editing, and speaking skills.

Now I have been working for the government for 12 years. I have a nice salary, tons of benefits, I enjoy the work, and I’ll have a nice pension when I retire in another 17 years. I lucked into buying a house in a fashionable urban neighborhood right before values went through the roof, and now I have over a quarter million dollars in equity for doing nothing at all. By the time I retire, it’ll probably be close to a million (if not more). The wife and I will go to Mexico or Colombia or Croatia somewhere and live like royalty.

All in all, I think I did okay for an 11th grade dropout who didn’t know where his next meal was coming from. We Gen Xers are a plucky bunch.

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tungstencoil@reddit

Genius but socially awkward. Picked on physically and mentally daily, so much so I have diagnosed PTSD (thank God for therapy). Rebelled against everything in my late teens, a kind of fuck the world. I literally hated everyone and everything.

I'm my thirties, I decided I was tired of being poor and single. Decided to make myself into someone I'd want to date. Got an entry level corp job, three myself into being the best employee, moved up swiftly. Took advantage of tuition reimbursement, got a degree in computer science. Got into tech, and have since developed a career in a niche industry. I'm an engineering VP, adjusted for inflation my last bonus was twice what I made in a year at the entry level. Mid six figure salary. Beautiful husband, been together 20+ years.

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thrwaway75132@reddit

Gifted kid who got all As up through 8th grade just by being smart. Never learned how to study. Got bad grades in high school. Spent a lot of time running around drinking. Graduated with like a 2.74.

Got kicked out of the first college I went to for stealing stuff and putting it in my dorm room. Failed out of the second. Got an IT job and worked my way up. They paid for me to go to college at night. Finished bachelor’s at 30. They paid for me to get an MBA, finished that at 32.

Left IT and moved to a hardware vendor doing presales. Discovered I loved it. Jumped to a software SaaS provider where I am an individual contributor director and field CTO. Made $800k last year.

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Longjumping_Way7715@reddit

I’m a screw up who made it. Terrible drug addiction for years and years. Finally got clean. I’m 52 now, with a wife and kid. Been clean for years now. Life is good.

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I_M_N_Ape_@reddit

My older sister was "gifted".

I remember an argument between her and my mom. I think she felt unduly criticized about something school related.

A point she made to deflect criticism was: "....and look at IMN_Ape, he's a fuckin retard!"

That....hurt.

Truth be told, I did not ever quite "get" what academics was asking of me. I constantly felt like Bart Simpson when he scammed his way into the gifted class. That episide was brutally triggering. How?? How are all these people "getting it"??

Not even sure how this happened, but my combined household income is about 300k. HCOL area. Kids are awesome. Wife is awesome.

Her marriage (to an obvious asshole) imploded in her 50s, and she's gonna work way longer than she wants at a job she hates. No kids. Just cats.

We're fine and everything....but cosmic scales definitely deal with haughtiness and stubborness about intelligence.

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PappyBlueRibs@reddit

y=r^3/3

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I_M_N_Ape_@reddit

RDRR!!!

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

Ah, not a contest by any means. We all have our own story. I just wanted to hear from people who made it and I'm pleased to see there are so many of us

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MuttsandHuskies@reddit

I got pregnant at 17 at the beginning of my senior year of high school. I did graduate, but I worked a bunch of menial low paying jobs for about 10 or 15 years and then I got hired at a tech company where I had convinced myself that they were gonna figure out I wasn’t smart enough to work here and they were gonna fire me at any point in time. I have been here for 19 years and I pull in about 150.

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Wheres_Jay@reddit

I was voted most likely to end up in prison. Haven't been to prison, and now have a wife, 6 kids, 3 grandkids, and a 6-figure job. Some of us just a while to figure it out.

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Impossible_One_6658@reddit

Big slacker! Got into too much trouble to be allowed in the gifter program. Suspended all the time. Solid C- student.

Now I have a great family, dogs, houses, and businesses.

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SasquatchIsMyHomie@reddit

I was an underachieving “gifted” kid with extreme undiagnosed anxiety. I managed to muddle through a stalled out career track that I just sort of fell into, with lots of resume gaps and a never ending stream of temp and assistant jobs. It wasn’t until the last few years that I got myself medicated and got into a job that I actually liked, and started excelling at work. Being in a corporate office environment is still really hard on me so I’m not sure how long I’ll last, but at least I can say I did it.

Related, anyone got good recs for a semi-retirement hustle? I hate people and selling things.

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datanerdette@reddit

Similar gifted child who was "not living up to my potential" in school. Extreme introversion and anxiety made school and jobs involving people very difficult. Now I do freelance bookkeeping. I can go days without talking to anyone, and I make my own hours. It's full-time now, but my plan is to go part-time once the kids are done with college and I have no more tuition bills to worry about. If you are self-directed, can learn software applications, and have a number sense, you can learn it quickly.

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SasquatchIsMyHomie@reddit

Hmm, thank you, that’s a great idea! If you don’t mind me asking, how did you find your initial clients?

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datanerdette@reddit

I had a friend who was a bookkeeper, she referred people to me ilwhen she had too many clients to take on anyone new.

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TeacherPatti@reddit

I also tested high in grade school. Then in the 9th grade, my parents got divorced and something in me said "fuck it." I stopped working, my grades plummeted, I got kicked out of the honor society and honors classes. I was a complete slacker in high school, wanting only to get the fuck out and go to college. I passed my classes and did okay on the ACT and got my wish to go away to school.

I entered college with a completely different mindset. My grades were tops and I ended up going to a top law school, passed the Bar and practiced a few years before I decided it was boring (hi, adhd!). Ended up getting my MA in Education and have been teaching for almost 20 years now. I tell the kids constantly that I was a slacker in high school and ended up having a great life! Own my condo, wonderful husband, plenty of $, pension, published four books traditionally (real publisher), public speaker, etc.

I'd love to run into the boys in high school who told me I'd never get into law school. I guess I could troll the garbage dumps and maybe run into them? Anyway, life is great!

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MystyreSapphire@reddit

I did n9t get to graduate on time because I was .5 credits short. I was a chronic class ditcher. Never did homework.

At 46 I got my Bachelor's. I just turned 50 and recently got my 6th promotion in 5 years. I am making more than I ever have and love my life. Not bad for the girl who didnt get to walk with her class.

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music420Dude@reddit

A teacher once told me “life isn’t wrapped up in a paper!” Jokes on them, cause I work in the cannabis industry with my own brand, making more than they ever could dream of, and I work way less with less stress than any teacher could.

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harperlee1966@reddit

I remember my high school testing that provided your top two professions as predicted by your scores. I was so excited! My results...beautician and sales. I have a MSN and work in management. Most days I daydream about that beautician recommendation 😊

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Glum-One2514@reddit

Stoner/punk/metal head. Long hair and earrings (still 😎). Refused to do my work and graduated with a 2.6 GPA.

I took (and loved) machine shop classes all thru HS , and a semester @ community college.

Used that schooling to get me off a forklift and into production maintenance. I used my time there to learn and fill other skill gaps the team had. Taught myself process controls and PLC programming, among a ton of other things.

Those skills got me promoted to Engineering where I still sit a few promotions later (into year 12, now). Could go higher, but zero interest in management.

I'd imagine some of my teachers would be astounded.

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Jefwho@reddit

I was in advanced classes in elementary school. Same in junior high. By high school I started smoking pot and ditching classes a lot. Senior year one of my teachers had it out for me. Despite having a passing grade, she failed me in the final semester. I walked at graduation not knowing of this. Went to the table to collect my diploma and who was sitting there but her. She told me in front of all my friends that she failed me to make a point. It ruined me. I fell into a hole of smoking and drinking until I got in trouble with the long arm of the law. Over the years of crappy jobs and some attempts to go back to school things just never seemed to get better. At the age of 30 I met my wife. We were dating but aside from her, my life wasn’t much better. I was still living paycheck to paycheck and on the verge of losing my apartment. After a very long and serious conversation I decided I needed to go back to school and figure shit out. Not knowing what I was going to study I just started taking general education classes with some fun stuff in between. I took a tree identification class because why the hell not. It didn’t hurt that I love plants and gardening. The professor saw that I was doing really well and mentioned that I should pursue Landscape Architecture. Furthermore, she taught the entry level drafting class. One thing led to another and I’m all in on Architecture. A year before I graduated I was hired doing simple drafting tasks for contract work. He eventually asked me to work full time but, I told him I really needed to graduate. I explained to him my past and the importance of finishing out school and getting a degree and what it represented to me in my life. He agreed and kept me part time until I finished, after which I went full time. I graduated with Honors and finishing what I started gave me such a sense of happiness I never knew before. While I did not land in the Landscape Architecture field, I am employed working in Forensic Architecture. It’s an incredibly interesting line of work and I am fulfilled. I don’t make tons of money, but money is never an issue anymore. I have a matched retirement and full health benefits. Oh, and a loving and very supportive wife. Things are better these days.

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Hodler_caved@reddit

Went to 4 high schools, including being sent to a boarding school after minor trouble with the law. Barely graduated. A few failed attempts at college.

Partied too hard after that. Addiction, homelessness, etc.

I work for a big name Silicon Valley IT company as an engineer.

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In_The_End_63@reddit

Sort of. Tested well on IQ. Grades OK but not straight As. Did have some AP classes / credits. Had a foot in the waters of the burn out click though notionally I was more of a punk. Made it through undergrad in a difficult major with a low B average. Got into tech. At first not the best highest paid roles among my cohort. Did better over time. Not spectacular and maxed out in terms of org level in my 30s. Macro and the Boomer grey ceiling preventing upward movement did not help. All told, via being frugal and hitting a few home runs along the way, positioned for a possible OK retirement if I can keep working until at least SS sweet spot of 70. Stretch goal, RMDs at 75.

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acebojangles@reddit

Nothing as drastic as OP's story, but I was bad at school and got bad grades in high school. I was good at taking tests, so I got a half scholarship to my state school. Did badly there and got kicked out. Went back a year later and eventually went to law school. Doing pretty well now.

College admissions seem so much more competitive now. I'm not sure I would have gotten in if I was a student today.

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Next_Table5375@reddit

In high school (in the 90's) I was told by my guidance counselor the best thing I could do is drop out. I didn't. 2.1 GPA FTW! Although I didn't bother getting my first college degree until I was 30. Now I'm a Systems Engineer/Software Dev, make 6 figures and am currently working on a Masters.

Public school was basically useless for me.

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WilliamMcCarty@reddit

I was a shit student, never got an A in my life. Left high school part way through 9th grade. Packed my crap in an old car and moved to L.A. at 16. That sounds like a recipe for disaster but today I'm happy, healthy, own my own home, was my own boss for a long time, managed a department for a Fortune 500 company along the way. I kind of made out pretty ok.

Oh and just for fun I finally got that GED on my 45th birthday.

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liquilife@reddit

I posted this on the other thread, but it definitely fits this post much better.

I definitely did not peak in high school. As a matter of fact I did nothing in high school. I was awkward and mostly anti-social. I dropped out with no plan for life. At all. Was homeless at the age of 18. Sort of got my shit together while living at the union gospel mission for a year and getting counseling, structure. Etc.

I peaked in my 20s. I got a job doing hotel maintenance work. Money!! Well, not a lot, but enough to go paycheck to paycheck. I became an extrovert, vibed with the 90s alt rock scene to extreme levels and just loved life. I had a lot of friends. Played street ball with a lot of people for almost all of the 90s.

I then feel like I peaked again in my 30s when I started my health kick and doing those tough mudder competitions. Qualified for worlds toughest mudder. Didn’t do it, way too extreme. But it felt great to get the invitation. Started making more money doing IT work and web development.

THEN in my 40s I felt like I peaked again after I obsessed over learning guitar. Joined a band with some other GenX friends, got even better at guitar. Spent a bunch of years in the band becoming an extremely proficient rhythm guitarist. Learned just about every 90s rock song anyone could remember. Performed in a bunch of shows. It was awesome. I was a full time web developer transitioning to a senior developer in NYC then Seattle and the money was starting to really come in.

COVID hit and I gained a bunch of weight. And I started my 50s being fat, tired and slow. And out of the band since I moved. Fuck that, I went on the most intense routine and lost a lot of weight over the span of a year. Now I’m physically fit with almost no physical limitations again. I’m well into my role as a senior developer. Money is not something I think about very much, which is so nice. And I feel like I’m peaking again. Who knows.

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

I think I would just call that a steady arc of ascension.

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liquilife@reddit

That is fair. However, I was a fuck up in high school and a homeless teen.

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indefiniteretrieval@reddit

I went to highschool with genndy tartakovsky . A year behind me

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seaphpdev@reddit

I was a pretty good student, not the best in any of my classes, but above average I suppose. Nerdy and shy. My family was pretty strict and conservative Christian (for example, I was not allowed to listen to music or watch MTV or watch “scary” movies). Very early on I saw through the hypocrisy of religion and by my sophomore year in high school had gone full rebellion mode. But nothing bad - just rebelled against my strict and conservative parents. I made friends with some neighborhood skaters and they welcomed me into their circle of friends. I quickly earned the “black sheep of the family” title because I didn’t think being gay was a sin and other socially liberal ideals and I was really into computers and programming (which my dad said was inspired by the devil). This was late 80s/early 90s. I knew I wanted to do something with computers for the rest of my life. My dad thought it was a waste of time and nothing would ever come of these “new fangled home computers.” I began cutting classes in high school because I was bored and my grades suffered because of it. But I was enjoying life too much. I spent a year in Europe after graduating high school. Never took my SATs. Eventually enrolled in community college while working part time. Transferred to a cheap and easy-to-get-into state college, majored in computer science, graduated with a solid C, and moved to Seattle. Here I am 20+ years later, married, home owner in nice neighborhood, and a director of engineering pulling in more money than my dad has ever dreamed of. And now he’s the one that’s a fuck-up: broke, never saved for retirement, and living on social security alone. I feel like I haven’t even fully peaked yet. Life just keeps getting better and better (with a few bumps along the way of course.)

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raf_boy@reddit

I was a disengaged student during the latter years of high school (burn-out?)

In chemistry class of my junior year, our Ms. Trunchbull of a teacher (looks and demeanor) noticed my zoned out, way off stare, stopped the lecture. Looked me in the eye, seethed and spat out "you're going to be a coal miner!" (in sunny Los Angeles, where there are no coal mines)

Jokes on her! I was never a coal-miner!

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demosthenes29@reddit

I was a teribble student in HS--gifted but troubled, hung out with a bad crowd, starting going to bars when I was 16, never attended school, and finally dropped out because I just didn't think I could finish.

After three years of trying to survive waiting tables and working retail, I went to college and everything just sort of clicked. I ended up getting my PhD and am now a college professor.

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Rlyoldman@reddit

I can’t compete with your hardship at all. I was a loner in HS. Went through a lot of shitty jobs because I loved drugs. If it didn’t go in your arm I was down for it. Found a woman on her way up that liked who I was as a person (I’m a nice guy). Married her. She saved my life. I cleaned up, put her through college, and we’ve been together for 45 years. Since I thought I’d be dead by 24, thanks to her I’m going fine.

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Routine_Mood3861@reddit

In 1984 and 1975, I hung out with stoners in my junior and senior years. Didn’t partake myself, just found them an accepting friend group for me when I had zero self esteem.

Went to college for one year, but flunked out due to trying to manage grief after my sister was killed the year before by a drunk driver. I came from an educated family, lived in an affluent area, but never got help with the mental health issues I had from circumstances.

Worked low paying retail jobs. Married an unmotivated, uneducated spouse at 23. Finally realized I was always going to be poor without an education, and started taking classes one by one while I worked full time +.

It took 8 years, and getting divorced, but I earned an Associates in a healthcare technical role, followed by a Bachelor’s in business.

After I earned my degrees, life got way easier because I had more opportunities.

Fast forward, 9 years ago I opened and manage a professional services firm that serves government and large commercial clients. This year is tracking to be my company’s biggest year yet in gross revenue, with projections at $1.3 M.

My goal is to work another 8 years or so to make up for lost time from a $ to retirement POV.

Never give up. I feel like I’ve lived four lives already, and am looking forward to my next chapters!

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adamdouglaswitte@reddit

True story:

My wife and I love Pearl Jam, and we would often travel to see shows. We saw them in Quebec City close to ten years ago, and stayed for a few days after to enjoy the city.

The day after the show, we saw Mike McCready walking around by himself, taking pictures. We ended up walking and talking with him for a half hour or more. I mentioned that I teach high school and he kind of winces.

Turns out high school was not a good time or place for McCready: didn’t feel like he fit in, got made fun of for being the rocker kid, etc. After high school McCready starts playing professionally, gets a record contact, then another one, then Pearl Ham breaks huge, just in time for his ten-year high school reunion.

I asked him how it felt to walk into that reunion triumphant, and he just shook his head. He said that the second he walked into that place, the second he saw those folks who made him feel small, he felt the dread and anxiety return. It didn’t matter that he was a rock god, literally on the cover of Rolling Stone— he could not forget or escape how that place and those people made him feel.

Which is only one person’s experience, but still: kind of proof positive that trying to win over people who treated you like shit is useless— go find the people who don’t make you feel like shit, make something with them, and build the world you want to live in.

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edasto42@reddit

Wouldn’t say I was a fuck up, just an undiagnosed adhd/autistic kid that couldn’t find his groove. I went to a catholic high school to give even more context.

I was a very smart kid, ended up in all honors until my junior year. My mom tried to keep me sheltered up until then too. But around then I discovered that I was way more interested in art, and more fringe styles of living. That clashed hard with my Midwest middle class upbringing. Family and some older friends didn’t get it and I languished as an outsider.

After high school I followed the dictated life path of going to college to get a degree and settle into being an office drone, move to the suburbs and be bland like the rest of the family. But going to college only deepened my interest in non mainstream ways of life. But I still felt I had to play the game I was signed up for.

So do the college thing then enter the workforce. Office jobs were torture tbh. I didn’t understand office culture and just learned to loathe it. Quit that to run a paint store. This was a decent stopgap for a minute. But was still not where I wanted to be.

During all this time I was also a part time musician playing in bands and doing shows and such. This was definitely more where my heart was. I loved performing. But because my parents conservative views that were held deep inside me, I was taught to never put too much into the arts since the arts didn’t pay (which is partially true to a degree).

Fast forward a few years and a chance move to SoCal for my wife’s job happens. When we get here I still want to keep making music and art. Well come to find that it’s a possibility to make a living in the arts here. So threw a little caution to the wind and have become a somewhat in demand bass player for some circles out here. This has put me on adventures I never thought I would see. And it’s still going strong

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Substantial_Lab_8767@reddit

Congrats on going for your dream!!!

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Ok_Ordinary6694@reddit

I was on the 4.5 year plan (with 2 years of summer school) Bunch of blue collar jobs leading into a 20 year government job. Retired at 54. Happily married for 30 years.

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NorthRoseGold@reddit

All three of my kids excelled in high school. I mean I'm talking to the point of all the awards, valedictorian or salutatorian, teachers loved them etc.

Apparently this other PTA mom who wasn't thrilled with me hinted that they were just the kind of people who peaked in high school.

Well they all went to top colleges. Oldest two are thrilled with their careers. Middle one is in residency for ortho surgery, and the youngest graduates next week from, ahem, a university in Cambridge.

Seems like that's a peak to me. Husband and I are community college and state school kind of people lol

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RedCliff73@reddit

Wow. Congratulations on becoming you. Curious if you have any contact with either of your parents now. What kind of a mom does that to their kid?

You're an inspiration

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

My mom and I reconciled some years later, but it took a long time. The conclusion I reached is she, like all of us, is just another fallible person before anything else.

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Mysterious-Kick9881@reddit

I failed 9th grade. I went to 9 schools in 12 years bc of my dad's military career. high school guidance counselor told me to not waste my time in applying for college bc of my grades and attitude. I had sex at 14 with a much older dude. Avoided teen pregnancy (thank you Planned Parenthood!). Was in an abusive relationship and thought that might be it. Did a bunch of personal work. Been married 27 years to an amazing man and we have 2 great kids. I earned a BA and 2 masters degrees. Ran a multi million dollar agency and have been a college professor. Your beginning doesn't dictate your ending, and you can always start over!

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AffectionateSun5776@reddit

I'm glad you gloated right here!

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Valuable-Ratio8073@reddit

Skater, drummer, mediocre student. Told I’d be a good hotel manager, maybe. But definitely front desk….

Now, own law firm. Married 28 years, 4 great kids. Pilot as a hobby. Scoutmaster.

I do credit some to choosing not to do drugs or drink much.

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lockedinbliss@reddit

Grew up in the San Fernando Valley. Dropped out of High School in the 10th grade. Got sober in 88, joined the Army in 89. Went on to have a 22 year career in the Army and eventually retired. I had, what could arguably be described, as a Blessed career. Got further than I ever thought I would. Saw and did things that they made/make movies about. Wouldn't change a thing.

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J_Symtrc@reddit

Things I was told in school that were wrong: “You’re not going have a calculator in your pocket.” “You’re not going to make a living in music so pick something practical.”

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FullyAdjustableFunk@reddit

OP that’s a hell of a story. I don’t have anything to add to this thread. Just wanted to appreciate your accomplishment

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Reginald_Sockpuppet@reddit (OP)

I know I'm not the only one, but thank you.

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murphydcat@reddit

As someone who was in honor classes from kindergarten through HS, I hope all of those fuckups who I would let copy my homework and who have now made it would remember those of us who peaked at 16. At least buy us poor saps a beer or two!