What if we stopped Africa from splitting by just... filling the rift with concrete?
Posted by Davinjho@reddit | CrazyIdeas | View on Reddit | 53 comments
Scientists have confirmed that the African continent is slowly splitting apart due to tectonic activity along the East African Rift. The Somali and Nubian plates are drifting away from each other, and eventually this could lead to the formation of a new ocean.
But what if we just... filled the whole rift with concrete?
No new ocean. More land for Africa. Problem solved.
oneofthehumans@reddit
I think that would force it apart even more. Need to use ratchet straps and pull both sides closer together. Should be easy
sexist_bob@reddit
Super glue should do it
HachiTofu@reddit
Only works if you twang the strap and utter the mandatory 4 words
USDXBS@reddit
My dad has a bag of ratchet straps he loves breaking out for any occasion. I'm sure he'll let us use some.
Davinjho@reddit (OP)
We should quickly invest in Ratchet Straps stocks!
Shamewizard1995@reddit
Or, hear me out, start investing in the soon to be new beach front properties of Africa 2. Once the new ocean forms, you’ll be rich
R_FireJohnson@reddit
Africa 2 is crazy
MqAbillion@reddit
Africa 2: Savannah Boogaloo
CarlJustCarl@reddit
RSTR
Vladishun@reddit
Yeah OP is dumb and apparently has never seen a pothole.
Ratchet straps seem a little extreme, why not just put one long piece of duct tape lengthwise across the tear?
its_all_4_lulz@reddit
I can’t tell if you guys are serious or not. Obviously ratchet straps are not going to hold a fucking continent together, neither is duct tape. This is a job for flex tape, and nothing else.
oneofthehumans@reddit
I don’t think you’re taking this seriously
SquirrelNormal@reddit
Fine, two pieces of duct tape
Omnicide103@reddit
r/doohickeycorporation will get our brightest minds on the case o7
oneofthehumans@reddit
Woah.. that sub is awesome! 👍
Omnicide103@reddit
It's probably my favourite hidden gem tbh
People have started pretending to be members of various nonsensical departments in the comments (you're speaking to the head of the redundancy department of redundancy), it's hilarious
-Im_In_Your_Walls-@reddit
But you had to slap it and say, “Yep, that ain’t goin’ nowhere.”
UNITICYBER@reddit
Gotta pull on one of the straps once you're done and say "thats not going anywhere". Otherwise the whole thing will come undone
i_never_ever_learn@reddit
That's not going anywhere
redbo@reddit
You need to fill it with something flexible like caulk, concrete will just crack over time.
Religion_Of_Speed@reddit
You're gonna need something to anchor the land to the concrete. I'm thinking dumbbell shaped reinforcements with one end in the concrete and the other a few hundred miles into the Earth. That way the cement can hold those in place. Ratchet straps just aren't feasible with having to go under the ocean to attach them on the other side, it's just too deep and wet.
Personally I think we should turn it into the world's largest highway. 20 lanes on either side, a McDonald's every quarter mile, and Somalia can just be a parking lot.
Davinjho@reddit (OP)
I love this idea! Somalia would benefit from the parking fees!
Religion_Of_Speed@reddit
I thought so! Plus parking lots are already the most dangerous parts of the road so might as well put it with one of the most dangerous territories on Earth.
Frnklfrwsr@reddit
You’re presupposing that tectonic plate movements are a problem that requires solving.
It will take a very very very long time for this movement to occur. It will be so slow, that there’s no real problem with just allowing it to happen.
Did you go to see the Grand Canyon and think “man someone needs to fill this hole in!”??
mzialendrea@reddit
Definitely Bungie cords use them to stitch up the rift.
Dom-Luck@reddit
It would probably take longer than recorded human history for the split to happen.
Mika_lie@reddit
Concrete is good with compression, not tension. Thats why we slap some steel rods inside it.
Basically even your mom can stand on a relatively small concrete block without it shattering to pieces. But try to have her hang from one, and it snaps instantly.
Better choice would be flex seal.
doobyscoo42@reddit
Basically, you're saying that his mom's so fat she can break concrete by hanging from it.
eaterofbeans@reddit
Nothing gets past this guy
Right_Moose_6276@reddit
That was the implication
qozh@reddit
Because of the implication?
baumpop@reddit
I like how everybody thinks sand is infinite and free.
And no you can’t make concrete out of desert sand.
Life-Ad9171@reddit
Oh, "...you can't make concrete out of dessert sand." You just want to hog all the sand for yourself! Sand is sand!
baumpop@reddit
Desert sand is round tiny balls of glass. Ocean sand takes millions of years to make because it forms by mountains being ground down into micro boulders and rolled all the way to the ocean. They’re tiny rocks not tiny glass.
Life-Ad9171@reddit
Yeah, glass is made of silica, not rock. I was making a funny :)
baumpop@reddit
I hate how literal I can be lol
Life-Ad9171@reddit
Ah, its alright man
inspiringirisje@reddit
I only hate how uneven it's splitting
its_all_4_lulz@reddit
I can’t tell if you guys are serious or not. Obviously ratchet straps are not going to hold a fucking continent together, neither is duct tape. This is a job for flex tape, and nothing else.
scampf@reddit
All jokes aside, if we had the technology to be able to patch the rift, the split would just begin again at the next weakest spot.
AnotherFeynmanFan@reddit
Concrete has low tensile strength. Ie-, it's bad at holding things together.
Soar_Dev_Official@reddit
no, it's a crazy amount of material to use + concrete doesn't even really hold things together. we should use giant staples to keep it from splitting any further
plainskeptic2023@reddit
I think it would be cheaper and just as effective in our lifetimes to just deny the rift is happening.
Kiwi_Apart@reddit
By the time any human notices, climate change will have removed all the concerns.
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dylan_1992@reddit
So you have a force that splitting a literal continent.
Then think your concrete could hold it together?
wggn@reddit
clearly they didnt put enough concrete on that fault line
Snake_Eyes_163@reddit
By the time it gets to be a significant size gap we may have the technology to drill down into the mantle to cause volcanic rock to fill in the gap. The crust is thinnest along those rifts between continents so it might be possible.
scarr3g@reddit
But... Has it tried therapy, first?
Ok-Walk-7017@reddit
Krazy Glue would work better, I think. Maybe slap some duct tape across it for good measure
Brokenandburnt@reddit
I was looking for this comment.😁
galaxyapp@reddit
Over the 10s of millions of years, it will be largely filled with erosion for a while. We could dump some dirt or cement in there also, but as it gets to the bottom of the plate, the chasm would be beyond filling.