Should I report to social services?

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Nope. This is completely normal tbh. I have a woman like that upstairs. My partner's daughter is also reception age and, without exaggerating or being unfair, she's a little fucking shit. Seems to me it's more rare to find a well behaved reception age kid tbh. What you've essentially just done, and exactly what I've just had to go through literally 5 days ago, is made that poor woman's already quite clearly stressful life, even more stressful by wondering if their child will be taken from them. It's a fucking awful feeling, and you should be fucking ashamed, because the school will "take it further" for literally anything these days, and from simply swearing in the street, social services will close that case within the hour.

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pullingteeths@reddit

Screaming and swearing at a small child is not normal. It's emotional abuse. Being stressed doesn't excuse it, no child (or person of any age) deserves that. Anyone who is doing this has the responsibility to learn better parenting techniques and how to manage their anger and emotions better. I feel sorry for the children you know if you think this is normal, they have bad parents.

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Yiazzy@reddit

Well, this was an easy game of "Find the Non-Parent".

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pullingteeths@reddit

Look at the rest of the comments here including many from parents. I've watched my sister have a child at 19 and bring him up without screaming and swearing at him even when he was a handful. You're on your own in this line of thinking. You don't scream and shout at people, that's bad and abusive behaviour. How do you expect a child to behave well when you're acting like that?

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Old_Manner_9044@reddit

Social services don’t do much. A friend worked at a school and they would report all sorts to SS and SS never took any of the kids away

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TenToedThingi@reddit

If anyone ever has the thought, ‘Does that need reporting?’ Then yes, report it.

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doomdoggie@reddit

Record the audio, you want at least 3 different incidents and when you get to the third, open the door and get video of who it is. Then see how many more videos you can get, be careful she doesn't see you. The more evidence you can get the better. Because once she realises social services is onto her, she'll not do this anymore. Right now you have an opportunity to get evidence. By next week you should have plenty for social services to use.

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coop190@reddit

Do all of that and social will go round and absolutely fuck all will come of it. Standard procedure

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carpexn0ctem@reddit

Unfortunately social services do not get the funding needed. Whilst everyone in the services and out would agree that this child is facing abuse at home and needs to be monitored/helped/removed, they do not have the government in their corner to provide the resources to put this child in better conditions. They near enough have to work at a “is this child’s life in immediate danger?” basis. It’s horrible but the reality.

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poopio@reddit

A sad state of affairs. Probably why with every generation, we seem to end up with more little cunts \*shakes fist, get off my lawn\* But seriously, when I was a kid, we'd go around being dicks... proper dicks... trashing council property, maybe painting the odd bit of BT infrastructure, but we would never consider being cunts to actual people.

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Countcristo42@reddit

In terms of crimes, statistically if you were a kid more than 20 years ago while you might not have been more of your peers were nasty to actual people

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ginormousbreasts@reddit

Yeah, every generation in every corner of the world thinks that the one behind them is falling apart in all manner of ways. It's usually bollocks.

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Countcristo42@reddit

The funny one I heard lately was early Roman writings (while it was still a city state) talking about how the youth were so decadent and would cause all the hard won victories they ancestors had fought for to be lost in their apathy and lack of courage Which isn’t … entirely what went on to happen

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ginormousbreasts@reddit

There's another example of a monk in the middle ages going off about how novices can't read or write like they used to. The world has been falling apart since the start of time.

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coop190@reddit

I understand that they are underfunded but that is all too often the excuse for absolutely awful decision making and case follow up.

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Present_Confection80@reddit

I agree, it's a cop-out thing to say in my opinion

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shinchunje@reddit

That’s not always the case especially with the school involved. I work in a school and there have been many instances in safeguarding wherein an effective action has been taken by social services. And while I live on the UK, I’m from the states in the south and they have appalling social services there.

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calmbabe@reddit

Please please report. Make sure you remain anonymous and always better reporting to make sure that little girl is safe. (From a girl who wished someone had called when i was little)

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Time-Contribution682@reddit

Well done for making that call. It could change a young life for the better

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Remote_Specialist52@reddit

Just for a heads up, it's very unlikely social services will step in, especially for a mother, I've seen stuff like this regularly and social services don't care until the child is being harmed and they never probe much past a cursery glance but if its a man, different story.

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NotRealWater@reddit

It's quite common for parents to make empty threats to children. So unless you suspect that she is actually buying her child or making them stand in a corner all night then that could be nothing. Unless the child is in danger or their immediate needs aren't being met (clothed washed fed etc) social services would rather leave a child in a disfunctional home than take them away from family. Also, when you contact social services, "I saw a kid on the street" isn't going to be enough info for them to fill in their stupid little forms. Even the I line form asks for things like 'surname', don't know how they expect us to know the surname of some random kid.

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trin6948@reddit

You did the right thing, threats to injure should always be taken seriously. It may be your report was just what was needed to put an investigation in to action. Well done you!

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bat-brain-on@reddit

You might not see this reply, but thank you so much for doing this! I work in paediatrics and a lot of my job is to do with safeguarding kids, who may or may not end up Looked After by the Local Authority. A lot of people will comment on stuff like this “social services won’t do anything” and it’s true that they’re massively overloaded and underfunded, but unless we as the adults actually tell them about kids to try and protect them how are they ever supposed to do anything? They almost certainly aren’t going to swoop in and take this kid away from her mother on the basis of this, but if they can monitor and offer support then they may be able to prevent further harm, and if it were to escalate or they get further evidence then they can safeguard her. You’ve done a really good thing.

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Cakeyhands@reddit

Thanks for looking out of a child is all I can say. This is the most important thing we can do as a society

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_demidevil_@reddit

Trust your gut. This isn’t how any parent should treat a child, phone your local MASH and anonymously report. I understand what you are saying in that she’s not coping. I was a fairly young mum and struggled to cope. I do have empathy for those in that situation - but there’s no need to threaten and frighten a child like that. At 21/22 even though I drank far too much wine, had a very high needs autistic kid and my own serious health issues I was still cognisant enough to take the following action when I became frustrated with her: endure she is safe (even if she’s crying) leave the room and scream in to a pillow. Calm myself down before returning to the baby/toddler. Screaming *at* my kid was not an option. It never has been. Regardless of what the mum is going through, the kid doesn’t deserve it. The phrase “imagined infarctions” really struck a chord with me just because I see this so often - parents putting unnecessary and unrealistic boundaries on kids for no good reason other than “I’m in charge”, “it looks weird” or “it’s annoying”. Because the kids get set unrealistic boundaries some of them give up trying to follow any boundaries at all. Boundaries lose meaning, kid just doesn’t respect them at all.

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FellowEnt@reddit

Thank you for your input that's really interesting. How did you learn about managing boundaries like this?

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_demidevil_@reddit

It’s dependent on age and level of understanding and development. When she was little (non verbal until she was almost 6) when she did something dangerous or defiant I would tell her “no”. I wouldn’t say anything else, if she ignored me I’d just pick her up and move her away. Don’t make eye contact. Walk away. Lots of fuss and attention when she responded to a “no”. She even hit me a few times and I just turned my back and walked away. Because it didn’t get a response she didn’t bother with it. Now she’s older - Never set a boundary without a reason. So I wouldn’t say “you have to wear shoes in the garden”. I’d say “you need to wear shoes in the garden otherwise you might step on something sharp and hurt your foot”. Try to do this in simplest language possible. If she doesn’t know the reason she doesn’t remember the rule. She also wouldn’t respect it because it would seem pointless. Luckily she’s not a badly behaved kid at all. She’s never had significant behavioural problems. She did scream and have meltdowns a lot before she could speak probably because it’s frustrating not being able to communicate! Went through some dark times then. I do really think my approach paid off because we never got stuck in a power battle like you see in so many parent-child relationships.

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cuccir@reddit

Do you know the school that they go to? If so I would get in touch with them. They will know if there are any broader concerns about the family, and may be able to add your evidence to what they already have if there's a bigger problem.

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holmortician@reddit

This is a good shout, I tried to ring SS over something I keep seeing a couple of weeks ago they told me they couldn't do anything because I didn't have a home address and to ring the police instead. Annoyed me tbf.

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octoberforeverr@reddit

Why would that annoy you? How are Children’s Services going to identify a member of the public without any information about them? Police are an emergency service that can go out with no identifying information. Children’s Services are not.

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holmortician@reddit

It annoyed me because it's the same group of people getting pissed up while a baby sits in the pram, same place, same people almost everyday. It's blatent. That's why it annoyed me.

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RambunctiousOtter@reddit

They don't have the ability to investigate and identify people. The police do. They gave you the correct advice.

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Dwcskrogger@reddit (OP)

I don't but I can make an educated guess judging on where they are walking from. Thanks I'll get in touch and let them know

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ymaface@reddit

I'm a social worker and I work in child protection. This is the correct answer. Include as much detail as possible

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clj73@reddit

My hat goes out to you because it's yet again the public criticize the professionals that are out working and helping. They don't blame the government for cutbacks, red tape and stupid rules. Because it’s not the government seeing the horrors and staying awake all night worrying. It must be a awful job because no one wants to have Social services turn up. So can imagine the abuse they put up with whilst only trying to protect your child.

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ymaface@reddit

I love my job most of the time. As i said above, meeting and supporting the kids themselves is usually the highlight. I tried working in adults but it was dull. I also work in a fantastically supportive and funny (though somewhat mad) team which is crucial. It's chaos but in a good way. The bad? Definitely the cutbacks to resources (especially mental health), long waiting lists for help, the large amount of paperwork (75% of job is admin), and top of the list is yeah awful parents. I don't get too many aggressive ones (I'm about 5"2 and wear dungarees a lot - very non threatening) but the worst imo are the ones who are purposefully unwilling to change because they can't be bothered, or their priorities are elsewhere (new partner/new baby). Very frustrating to ask parents to parent. I'd say 75% of families are happy to work with me usually - even if it's just to answer questions.

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solemndodo@reddit

Thanks for your work, it must be tough, I really appreciate all you do 👍

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ymaface@reddit

Honestly? The good moments far outweigh the bad, and 99% of the kids I work with are awesome. Thanks though 👋

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minisrugbycoach@reddit

My mother in law was a social worker. Head social for children's services in a very large catchment area. All tough cases she would have to make the final call for. Tough does not begin to touch the sides of how awful it is for far too many out there. It's nice to hear that some people do actually appreciate and knowledge how bad it can be.

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BAdhoc@reddit

Just wanted to say thanks for asking on here and putting the suggestions into action. You might have just put things in motion to make that kids life better. Thanks for caring.

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worldworn@reddit

Honestly, well worth a bit of a chat. If you have a rough description, they will probably know who you mean. It sounds horrible, but these types of parents are often known by the school. These kids often are the ones who come to school without a hat in summer, who fall asleep in class, who get upset for "no reason". Schools can only act, if people speak up.

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ellemeno_@reddit

Sadly, it’s the six weeks holidays now and it’s unlikely anyone at the school will be contactable. It might be worth checking the school’s website for their safeguarding policy, seeing who their designated safeguarding lead is and is their email address is available. If not, contact the LADO for where you live, as they’re likely to be able to contact DSLs (or the head) out of school times.

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PantherEverSoPink@reddit

There will be someone at school doing safeguarding things all summer even if there are no students in. Their details will be on our of office messages, voicemail, and the school website.

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ellemeno_@reddit

Sadly this hasn’t been the case in the primary schools I’ve taught in, and contact had to be made via the relevant LADOs.

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PantherEverSoPink@reddit

Ok, thanks. I work in secondary so didn't realise it would be different in primaries (but they are smaller I guess so that makes sense)

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Dwcskrogger@reddit (OP)

She was in school uniform today so hopefully they'll be open this afternoon? I've left a message with the school outling my concerns and left a contact number

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ellemeno_@reddit

Oh fantastic, there’s still time then! I know most of the schools where I live have already finished, so I’m glad her’s is still open. Good luck. You are absolutely doing the right thing. Maybe send an email too, so it’s documented in writing (phone messages can easily be lost/not passed on).

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Dwcskrogger@reddit (OP)

Just had a call from the school safeguarding officer. They know who it is from the description and will be taking it further.

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Appropriate_Road_501@reddit

Having worked in a school, this family is likely already known/has concerns. What you've witnessed is a valuable puzzle piece to them and will likely be part of a bigger picture. Hope the mum gets appropriate help.

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ellemeno_@reddit

That’s good to hear. Well done for making the call, it seems like your actions could really make a difference to that child. Continue documenting any further incidents over the summer as school holidays can be a time children at risk fall through the net.

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Awkward_Chain_7839@reddit

My daughter finished today, but they officially finish on Monday (but it’s an inset) but we always finish after everyone else (south wales).

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Illustrious-Bread239@reddit

The school I work at don’t finish till Tuesday in North Yorkshire with kids in 🙃😂

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ymaface@reddit

I'm a social worker and I work in child protection. This is the correct answer. Include as much detail as possible

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RambunctiousOtter@reddit

I would report it in the knowledge that this one bit of evidence may not meet the threshold for social services involvement. But if may add up with other reports to build up a larger story which may lead to social services interest.

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FellowEnt@reddit

Thank you for being a good human being. You've done something really important for those children.

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FreckledHomewrecker@reddit

This poor poor child. Unfortunately I doubt the school will do anything, I worked in a school where kids would come in hungry “because daddy didn’t buy food this weekend” and give them cereal from a small pantry we kept in the class room, kids wouldn’t be picked up then a neighbour would arrive “oh his mum is drunk in the garden, I’ll bring him home” etc and no one ever reported anything. I was v young and didn’t know what to do so followed the school approach but I wish I had done something now. Well done OP.

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ElectronicBrother815@reddit

This is so sad. The mother must’ve had a horrible upbringing to behave that way. I hope they both get the support to break the cycle of abuse 😭

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RichardTauber@reddit

Yes, important you do this urgently. Social services will be discreet and supportive, but by jiminy, it needs to be done, and asap.

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Sweetrolld@reddit

Are we referring to jiminy cricket or a different jiminy

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RichardTauber@reddit

Hehe. But I presume it was a euphemism for "By Jesus" -- imagine someone, used to using robust language among friends, started to say that and then realised there were children, or religious friends, present. My older Scottish friends use "Jings" as an exclamation in the same way.

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whoops53@reddit

Not to detract from this serious situation (which appears to be getting taken care of now) but I just had to comment on your "by jiminy". Not heard that since I was a little kid and it made me smile :)

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RichardTauber@reddit

I like to keep old usages like that alive if I can.

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Apod16@reddit

Well done OP

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Zaxa7@reddit

Thank you for doing this. You're a star.

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wherenobodyknowss@reddit

I really hope this helps the little girl, fingers crossed x

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farkenoath1973@reddit

This breaks my heart, the damage that women is doing to her daughter can be irreversible..

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Kokonuts457765@reddit

Definitely. That is totally the opposite way to treat a kid, especially a young one. Report it to social services as soon as you can

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No_Butterscotch_2663@reddit

Not too sure about the question. But as we have decoupled, the question of EU/US sanctioned substances should be put back. After having tried caffeine pills, pharmaceutical stimulants, benzodiapenes and most other over the counter remedies it seems that medical cocaine is one of the superior stimulants. Not sure why sales exemptions are not obtained for this substance. Full VAT would be paid. If you don't like it - don't buy it.

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is_that_a_wolf@reddit

Please do, my mum was like this and a vile physically abusive cunt. I always hoped someone would call social services on her but they didn't, I was too scared to do it myself.

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jaimefay@reddit

I'm glad the school are doing something. I work in a library, so obviously I see plenty of kids. Had someone from Social Services come to give us some training a bit ago and the takeaway from it was basically: if in doubt, report it. They're not going to go off the rails and remove a child because of one minor incident, frankly they're too damn busy and stretched way too thin. But what she did tell us was that there are times when seemingly minor incidents come together to create a pattern that indicates something is wrong, or a third party reporting something is the last piece of evidence they need. Most of the stuff people report lies on file, but sometimes it is part of something bigger that isn't obvious to that third party. I've only ever made two reports to SS, and as far as I know one went nowhere. The other was an excuse for a social worker to get involved in a situation they already had some concerns about, and the support they put in place seemed to turn things around for the family. You did the right thing.

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Mammoth-Wait3544@reddit

I'm of the opinion that if you ever even ask the question if you should report something, then you should report it. Reading what you've heard, there's no doubt that it needs to be reported. I'm no Buddhist Monk or anything, but I'm a parent and I haven't ever threatened my child like that. I can assure you, that is not how parents should behave.

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IndelibleIguana@reddit

Phoning social services on someone is despicable. Care homes are shop windows for the local rich peados.

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updownclown68@reddit

Well done for taking action to help safeguard the child/children

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s4turn2k02@reddit

I was that child. I’m glad it’s been reported

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Danglyweed@reddit

Well done for doing the right thing. I've 4 kids 8-14 and have only ever lost my shit at them only once, in public too. Luckily a lady was there that asked if I was OK and distracted the kids. I wasn't OK at that point but by fuck that woman helped me then. I've phoned social services, fuck I worked for them and reported right to my manager awful drug abuse and child turning up at mine during the night. Nothing!

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Anxious_Plane_8219@reddit

This is such a wonderfully based thread! Thanks for putting action behind these discussions! I do have a concern about what happens when kids are taken away and put into foster care, though. Not to say that I know what would happen in this case, and I'm not sure how prevalent the issue I'm speaking of is in Europe. But as an American, I've read stories about abuse and adoption into sex slavery straight out of foster care. Great book called "The Eagle and The Dragon" by a famous U.S. powerlifter that describes his experience with it when he was growing up. Evidently there was a lot of corruption and parts of the foster system were complicit. I just hope this kiddo ends up living well.

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clamtunashiny@reddit

Just want to say really well done. It’s so much easier to be a bystander but it sounds like this girl needs someone on her side, even if it’s just to prompt someone checking in. Thank you for being that person!

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Geekmonster@reddit

Throughout lockdown and the years that have followed, I've listened to the lady upstairs shouting and screaming at her husband and son. The boy is ~7 now. I've heard the husband say "don't you dare hit me" to her. She's a lunatic. I called the police and they came out to do a "welfare check". So, it's all on record now. It could've been any of the neighbours that reported her. We've all heard her ranting. So, if they ever get divorced, it's on record that she has been hitting her husband. It would be awful if she got custody of the kid. She's crazy enough to claim that he was abusive to her, but the police know the truth.

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Deepdiver272@reddit

Not following the term; reception age. What age is that?

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FlyBuy3@reddit

4

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FlyBuy3@reddit

See something, say something. Good on you.

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ch3zza80@reddit

Never judge till you've walked in that person's shoes you say your not a parent so u have no idea how hard it can be sometimes, maybe the child has additional needs and the mother is trying her hardest, maybe she is struggling at home, maybe she's already getting help maybe she's exhausted and has tired so much. I really hope she doesn't loose her children, maybe every morning this mother tries to be on time and her daughter just doesn't listen or do as she is told so she makes these empty throw away comments..

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Longjumping_Bid_2651@reddit

No matter WHAT you go through as a parent You don't fucking treat your child like that. "Maybe she's struggling" or "maybe she's exhausted"-- when does that warrant swearing and shouting at your child and threatening to hurt them?

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ch3zza80@reddit

Your right it doesn't

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Longjumping_Bid_2651@reddit

>maybe every morning this mother tries to be on time and her daughter just doesn't listen or do as she is told so she makes these empty throw away comments.. Why are you trying to make excuses for the behaviour then my guy? Come on.

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ch3zza80@reddit

No I'm not trying to make excuses for her but no one knows her story

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Puzzleheaded-Low5896@reddit

No, as a single Mum to 3 (and one with special needs) you might have the odd day when you are grumpy/stressed with them but not to the extent of the behaviour being described here. If this woman is behaving like this in public I shudder to think what goes on in private. Both the Mum and child need support in this situation.

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ch3zza80@reddit

They do indeed

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Davina33@reddit

I've got nothing to add as there's so much great advice already. Just wanted to say thank you for caring and doing what you can to protect this poor little girl. It does sound like the school are taking it as seriously as they can.

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Parking-Grade8241@reddit

Reading your post and your update, I just wanted to say thank you for doing something. It's so easy to ignore concerns or tell ourselves it's none of our business. Well done for actually acting on your concern!

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PantherEverSoPink@reddit

OP, I want to thank you for calling the school and social services. So, so many people would have done nothing.

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hhfugrr3@reddit

Just saw your update but from my experience I expect the school know who this kid is and are already doing something. Not the same at all, but when he was very little my son was attacked outside of school by a slightly older kid (both primary school age) who hit him with a piece of wood. He didn't tell us and we only found out when I saw huge bruises across his back at bedtime. Next morning, I went into school and spoke to the headmaster. Much to my surprise, he was already aware of what had happened (I'd raised it with my kid's childminder who had reported it to the head overnight). The head had taken action to prevent the other kid coming across my kid at school and - obviously couldn't go into detail - but said that there were other interventions being brought into help the other kid's mum and the kid himself. I was genuinely impressed.

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QuirkyMaterial@reddit

I’m so glad you have got the ball rolling for some sort of next steps for this family…what you wrote reminded me of a very similar situation I found myself in a few years ago. From the bus to work along a busy A road, I saw a young boy (in primary school uniform) looking lost and a bit bewildered. This stretch of road is always rammed in a morning, so I got plenty of opportunities to watch him from the stop/start of the bus as he he paced up and down the pavement like he was looking for someone. His uniform was filthy and covered in food stains and his shoes, which were undone, were clearly much too big for him. He didn’t look upset, more puzzled and to be honest, I couldn’t work out what was going on. Lost? Looking for siblings, friends? Someone to help him across the road? It is a busy road traffic wise, but there were no other adults in sight and something just felt off. He was bothering me all the way to work, so when I got there I messaged my friend (primary school teacher) and asked her which school his uniform was from - and I rang them. I didn’t even have to describe him fully for them to know exactly who I had seen - and it was definitely the same kid because the shoes had a neon orange stripe on the sole (as well as being too big for him). The school said they’d act on my info (whatever that meant) so all in all I’m glad I did ring but it was still a strange thing to do, I felt a bit intrusive but concern for the boy was the main driver. You defo did the right thing - I know it feels weird but as people have said, sometimes kids need an extra ‘something’ watching out for them just in case. Much love xxx

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BeesInATeacup@reddit

If you're asking if you should, then you should. If she's like this in public, what is she doing behind closed doors!

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jacquetpotato@reddit

Exactly what I was gonna say!

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Cattlemutilation141@reddit

What's the worst that could happen if you didn't do it?

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AngryTudor1@reddit

I didn't see this in time to be any help but just wanted to say that both you and the school have done everything 100% correctly SS will do nothing about it unfortunately unless they are already working with the family, but there isn't anything else or better you could have done

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Great_Cucumber2924@reddit

You did a good thing for that poor child. I hope her mum works so she doesn’t have to spend the summer at home with her.

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Strong_Roll5639@reddit

Oh this is so sad. Thank you for reporting.

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Beersink@reddit

Maybe it just took one additional report such as your to tip the scales and get something moving. Well done.

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BludSwamps@reddit

Well done for posting this, being considerate and following through and getting it on the correct peoples radar. A brilliant thing for you to have done and potentially huge for that little kid.

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TheDocJ@reddit

Responing after your Further Update. Thank you for taking action, glad to hear that it is beingtaken seriously.

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totesboredom@reddit

Owner of 2 young feral children here. Life can be VERY stressful, especially in the mornings... But there is no excuse for the threats and you did the right thing. For the school to take it further, they already had suspicions.

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terryjuicelawson@reddit

Just amazing, there is a woman I see taking her kids to school who is just awful. Not as bad as this but she looks like a Towie reject and speaks to her kids like absolute shit. "You are fucking pissing me off this morning!" and stuff like that. Screaming at them to stop / come back / leave her alone / stop hitting each other. The kids however run riot, she has no control as all she does is shout so it is background noise to them. Makes me concerned what your lady there is up to.

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fastbleepmeme@reddit

Like a lot of comments here; if you think about a report then report it. Much better to report something for it to be dismissed over not report and miss something

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curlanxiety@reddit

You are a good person. Who's cutting onions?

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yourbottomdollar@reddit

If I heard someone say that about biting to a child, any child, I’d fly at them. That’s disgusting. You are right to stand up for this child. Get a photo of them for the school to identify her. That poor baby.

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Dwcskrogger@reddit (OP)

The school called, they know who it is thankfully and will be taking action

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yourbottomdollar@reddit

Thank goodness.

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DNBassist89@reddit

Good on you for this, honestly. As another commenter said, "This kid can't speak up for herself, please do it for her" and you did.

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RequirementDear5831@reddit

What I always think with this type of thing is, your report alone might not make all that much of a difference, but perhaps if you’re the third person to report her for some reason or another then perhaps alarm bells will start ringing.

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Fun-Consequence4950@reddit

Absolutely report to social services, and take the advice in other comments here about documenting it well. You may very well save that little girl's life.

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Suspicious_dorito0@reddit

Well, its great that you haven't turned a blind eye to it! A lot would and do, so massive kudos for looking to take action! I can't imagine the torment that poor kid is enduring without even realising it nor how anyone could speak to a child like that. Just think, you could genuinely be saving that child from years of mental or even physical abuse, changing her life for the better. If its feasible, maybe see if anyone else has noticed this happening? They may have but may not want to speak up about it. Please do whatever you can to help her!

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azzthom@reddit

Yes. You should report to social services with any information and evidence you have. I'm sure social services would prefer a false alarm to a missed opportunity.

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DoctorOctagonapus@reddit

I had to do safeguarding training last year, the one point they make is no concern is too minor. Definitely report it, even if they decide not to do anything.

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bobbybuddha@reddit

Always report even if you just have an vague feeling something is wrong, most kids can't or won't speak out for themselves. In this situation, obviously something is very wrong, the problem is getting the evidence, I agree with the other commenters, get evidence I.e. recordings, and keep a record (a diary/notes) of dates and incidents you've overheard otherwise it will just be 'hear say'.

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Sivear@reddit

A report that isn’t necessary is better that a necessary report not made.

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Sea_Midnight1411@reddit

YES please report. Do it ASAP. Social services are there to look out for the kids. That might involve placing them somewhere else or with a relative. Alternatively, it might be that the mum is having some kind of trouble and actually social services could help, so she could get support and monitoring to help the family stay together. Either way, whatever she’s doing in public, she’s doing a hell of a lot worse behind closed doors.

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Ismays@reddit

A good rule of thumb for safeguarding concerns is not ‘what if I’m wrong?’ but ‘what if I’m right?’ I agree that the local authority safeguarding officer is where to start, and I disagree that you should record evidence yourself. Report your concerns first. If schools are closed they probably won’t be taking the same route anyway. They may not be able to identify them at this point, but get it logged.

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another_awkward_brit@reddit

Yes. So many cases have escalated to horrendous actions, with too many featuring "well, I thought someone else would report it". If you know the school (you suggest they're reception age?) and have gathered the evidence others have stated then the child can be found.

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Mumique@reddit

From domestic abuse training, it is always better to report than not. Because if it's not a problem no big deal, you might make someone annoyed that some anonymous bod reported them. But if it is and you report it you might save a life. Reiterating the document and report!

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QuietAnxiety@reddit

You can make a call to the child safeguarding team at your county councils social services. The call will be logged and if deemed serious enough to warrant further investigation you will be contacted. always report if you have a concern but don't be disheartened if nothing comes of it.

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bishibashi@reddit

Difficult to know how you can report if you don’t know their address, but suggest calling NSPCC for advice https://www.nspcc.org.uk/keeping-children-safe/reporting-abuse/report/#

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